Remember, Wonketteers in Oregon, Washington and even one or two of you freaks from Idaho: This is the weekend for the Decidedly Unofficial Seattle Gathering of the Wonkalos, and if enough people show up, we promise to never again use that term! The shindig will be Saturday June 30 starting at 6:30 PM at Latona Pub in beautiful Seattle.
The Wonkette gathering will be in the upstairs loft and pavilion. Be ready to drink like the Fremont Troll, if the Fremont Troll were able to set down that Volkswagen and pick up a pint. Your Correspondent will be there, assuming his 1973 Chevrolet, Vlad the Impala, does not deplete the Strategic Petroleum Reserve in making the trip from Boise.
Please note that this reader-organized event is not part of the officially-sponsored Wonkette Drinky Thing, so if you were expecting any actual Wonkette editorial staff to show up, you would be sadly disappointed.
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"…Vlad the Impala…" Hahaha! Happy Friday everybody – see you on Saturday.
All these Seattle stereotypes are offensive, good… *reads name* sir/madam!
I've been looking for a word that rhymed with buffalo for my epic pome [sp] I've been working on.
Have a happy drinky event. Take vid and pix, and make sure everyone signs the release so we can see them and have them identified.
If I were in the southern part of the state I'd be trying to carpool with you. Drink-up Wonketteers!
Hey, Dok — OT, but Texas GOP says that that whole "critical thinking" thing was just a mistake. They weren't thinking critically about it.
Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification)
Conservatives have had a hard on about values clarification since the mid/late 1970s. This was when stats were clearly showing that programs that included that stuff in early childhood, like Head Start, was producing older kids who were much, much less likely to get involved in gangs & drugs. Oh no can't have teaching kids that sort of stuff they may start questioning about Noah, Shem, Ham and Japheth riding on dinosaurs.
They rode Mastodons, dummy!
Beware the mastadon. It will cut you with a linoleum kniiiiiife! !
What about us smug ex-pats living in the Socialist Paradise also known as British Columbia? We will bravely cross the border into the gun-crazed methlab known as "Seattle" and flaunt our healthcare, gay marriage, and five weeks vacation in your lumpen faces, and perhaps buy you a pint with our fancy money supplied by Communist China, which they give us by the boatload for oil and dead trees and other shit we used to sell to America when it was a real country.
You know, I was going to mention you Canada guys, and then I went to get another cup of coffee while I was typing, and plum forgot.
So typical, and so characteristic of the relationship between our two nations.
As long as you don't bring any Tories with you – or tar sands for that matter, then I for one will welcome you heartily. Wayward depressed and mourning Leafs, Canucks, Sens and Habs are also welcome.
What the hell, bring an Atlantic-er or two, and snag anyone who sounds like Chantal Hébert to bring with also, to round out the panel, as it were.
A+ for the Chantal reference. she's the best.
PS Wonkalos comes from Juggalos. Do some research, if you dare….
I watch the CBC daily. Their [allegedly] party-aligned commentators actually speak to and of each other with moderate respect. Substantive policy conversations are had. However CAN politicians themselves have sadly devolved into US-like parodies of themselves.
Have you attempted full CAN citizenship, or are you work-visa-ing it?
Full citizen.
While the American influence is certainly grotesque to behold, I work with and know plenty of conservatives who are to the left of Obama. If the Libs and NDP ever merge they'd have an easy majority.
"flaunt our healthcare, gay marriage, and five weeks vacation in your lumpen faces"
Hey!!! Unkind, man, unkind.
Just so you leave the Celine Dion Stick-Twat at home.
She's in Vegas taking your tax dollars via old stupid fucks. Thanks!
Belongs in fucking Branson. No, wait; Vegas is farther away.
I would be an ex-pat living in beautiful, sane B.C., but couldn't be that far from the grandkids. Five weeks vacation? That's so European. Lucky you.
Hell, as if just the drinking with like-minded peoples wasn't enough; now I get to witness the storied chariot that is Vlad the Impala. Giddy anticipation ensues.
But Wonkalos? Is that some sort of Latin-ification of Wonketteers?
Don't mourn, organize LIKE A BOSS.
So, everyone is going to wear a face mask of their avatars, right, so we can recognize each other? Or is emmelemm actually a jumping pig? I'm going to try to make it just to answer such questions?
My pig is flying, not jumping!
Oink!
Today she's really flying, because the Supremes upheld "Obamacare".
Wonkalo makes me think of that song, you know that song. The one with the "low, low, low, low". That song where Tom Cruise was dancing and something something apple jeans, furry boots. Oh you know what song I'm talking about.
Anyways, have fun drinking the alcohol!
Southbound I-5ers who are not familiar with the Green Lake area might find taking Exit 169 the easiest. For northbound I-5ers you absolutely want to take Exit 170. When you are on the exit ramp, just after you pass the Exit 170 road sign (it'll be on your left towards I5) make sure to look to your left. This is the beloved Betty Page exit. City streeters will obviously know where they are going ;=)
When the Exit sign is on your left, you'll want to look to your right, if I'm not mistaken?
Absolutely, to Betty is on the right.
Are you Zombie Johnny Carson?
And don't forget, whichever way you're travelling on the I5, just go 10 mph below the speed limit whilst in the outside lane. You'll fit in like a star!
The state patrol is EVERYWHERE on I-5 today. Watch your speed, kiddies.
What about the farm report? What's the price of OG Kush?
God this weather sucks. I'm going to stay home and resume cutting myself.
Noooooooooooooooo……
Might as well come to the party and cut yourself with the rest of us.
Can't. Going to BC on Saturday. Hopefully while I'm there I'll run into a few wingtards who have decided to leave the country and congratulate them on their excellent choice.
If I thought any actual Wonkette Staff would actually show up, I wouldn't attend. I have my standards, ya know. Just joking, l can't attend anyway, wifey won't let me.
Boooo. Dump your wife!
Naw, she's a nice girl.Sent from my iPhone
I'm meeting wifey afterward. Told her that by then I'd be liquored up and ready for luvin'. Seemed to work.
Hard for a teetotaler to make that promise. Not sure I could sell it, anyway. Glad somebody I like is going to get some.Sent from my iPhone
Wonkalo Motto: F**king conservatives. How do they work?
1. Apply for farm subsidy;
2. Deposit money in Cayman account;
3. Clip coupons;
4. Complain about shiftless darkies.
I just received my "Learn About the United States: Quick Civics Lessons for the Naturalization Test" pack from USCIS, perhaps I shall bring it to quiz my fellow Wonkalos. And out any secret communists, obviously!
Didn't bother testing, assumed everyone was a communist anyway.
The 16 bus goes right past the place, so safe imbibations.
6:30 6/30
https://skydrive.live.com/redir?resid=402EE95E56B…
Vids.
I don't remember sitting on the ceiling… but, hey, I was drinking: the tape doesn't lie.
The bar is notorious for not shielding against the effects of Lionel Richie dance parties next door.
We were supposed to take sideways images, not upside down!
IT'S ALL RUINED!
It is way too loud.
Sorry to dash, but my bus comes in 2 minutes.
Lovely to talk to y'all last night: WeeJee, Owls, Emmellemme, BigSkullFuckingDog, JonWhoDoesntComment and the rest whose handles I can't recall at the moment. Had dinner w/ the wifer afterwards and she told me "The thing I love about you is that you're always growing … well, maybe not your sense of humor …".
Great to meet you too Nostrildamus! Damn pity that Doktor Zoom and Vlad the Impala couldn't make it to the shindig, but it was great to meet so many Wonketters and I've been having big fun with my door prize – <a href="http://www.mcphee.com/shop/products/Nunzilla.html” target=”_blank”>www.mcphee.com/shop/products/Nunzilla.html.
Thanks again WeeJee for setting this up and thanks to our Editrix for everything you do to keep me sane, informed and entertained.
I luv yous guys!
Alright, Lurker Jon! Now get an account and a picture for your avatar!
GAWD, it kills me that I didn't get to go. I hope everyone had a blast.
Also, too, Seattle meetup-goers with pictures and stories of the party should email me at doktor underscore zoom at-sign yahoo dot com. This comment will self-destruct in 24 hours or so to prevent spam.
If you have usernames to go with photos, so much the better!
News on the Fix Vlad pun-raiser to come soon.
Cool!!
ETA: BoatOfVelociraptor's comment below has a link to a video. You can mainly see Weejee.
Was there anyone else to see?
I'm the Asian looking guy in the cream colored light jacket and yellow shirt with the two headed eagle of the Holy Roman Empire on it!
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