because karl rove

Karl Rove Still Making Mockery of Campaign Finance Law, Humanity

thug lifeYesterday, ThinkProgress reported that Karl Rove, disgusting human being and co-founder of the American Crossroads Superpac, is making a “mockery of the law” by attending a Romney-hosted retreat for top $100,000-and-up campaign bundlers and donors at a Park City, Utah, resort. Predictably, the internet is all a-twitter at the shocking revelation that a SuperPac cofounder would coordinate with a political candidate. Shocking, isn’t it.

Via ThinkProgress:

This weekend, Mitt Romney and his campaign will host a retreat for top $100,000-and-up campaign bundlers and donors at a Park City, Utah resort. The event, dubbed the “First National Romney Victory Leadership Retreat,” will reportedly be an opportunity for “strategizing and fraternizing” between those bankrolling the campaign and those running it.

But one name has raised flags for campaign finance watchdogs. A Saturday panel on “media insight” will feature American Crossroads and Crossroads GPS co-founder Karl Rove. The Crossroads reportedly plan to spend a stunning $300 million to help Romney defeat President Barack Obama this November, but they are legally prohibited from coordinating this effort with Romney’s campaign.

But really, is this really being fair to Rove? I mean, since he makes the laws, isn’t it up to him to  decide who mocks them? Also, isn’t this the least of Rove’s law-mocking, given that he used federal tax dollars to engage in political activity during the Bush administration and also may or may not be a war criminal? Besides, who are WE to tell KARL ROVE what kind of speech he can have? Laws are for little people, duh. Now please enjoy this famous video of Karl Rove rapping.


About the author

Kris E. Benson writes about politics for Wonkette and is pursuing a doctorate in philosophy. This will come in handy for when they finally open that philosophy factory in the next town over. @Kris_E_Benson

View all articles by Kris E. Benson
What Others Are Reading

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.


  1. Baconzgood

    Unrelated to this post.


    1. Callyson

      And I'm finally getting my drink on as well.

      If you're not passed out yet, here's a toast to the Pirates…I know I know I know, but we can celebrate a winning record and being a contender while it lasts…

  2. Callyson

    The Crossroads reportedly plan to spend a stunning $300 million to help Romney defeat President Barack Obama this November

    Every time some teabagger starts going on about the deficit, I will bring this up. Makes me ill to think of how many *productive* uses to which that money could be put…


    1. glamourdammerung

      I think you are giving Scalia way too much credit for consistency and integrity.

  3. Dr. Nick Riviera

    Yeah, but Obama asked for donations from people on their gift registries. Who's the *real* villain one here?

  4. FidoMcCokefiend

    "Strategizing and fraternizing"? Isn't that what Larry Craig was doing in the Minneapolis Airport bathroom?

  5. dogscantlookup

    My doc gonna give me so much shit for my constant drinking on Monday, got to stop the urge ta stab everything somehow !
    What`s a liver?

    1. flamingpdog

      I'm pretty sure Jaizuz will descend from the clouds in a flaming chariot and turn the HR Rethugs into pillars of salt shit before that ever happens.

      1. Fukui-sanRadioBarb

        Crossroads GPS is a 501(c)4 therefore donations are legally protected from disclosure! HURRAH FOR TEH LAW!

  6. bikerlaureate

    More than a dozen Republican heavy-hitters are scheduled to join the private retreat as special guests. According to a fundraiser who is attending, they include some GOP stars thought to be in contention to be Romney’s vice presidential running mate: Rep. Paul Ryan (Wis.), Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal and Sen. John Thune (S.D.).

    Sen. John McCain (Ariz.), the party’s 2008 presidential nominee, also is scheduled to attend, according to the fundraiser. Other expected guests include former secretaries of state Condoleezza Rice and James A. Baker III, former Florida governor Jeb Bush, strategist Mary Matalin, and commentators Bill Kristol and Fred Barnes.

    Sounds like a meeting of KAOS (or CONTROL) to me…

    1. NellCote71

      Hey, highrollers, please let little Billy Kristol pick the VP nominee again. Please, please.

      1. bikerlaureate

        I think the traditional format is, "Oh, NOOOOOooes, we libtards would be terrified if little Billy Kristol picked the VP nominee again. We'd be toast! Please, pleeeEEEEEZZZZZeee don't listen to him !!!!!!1!"

  7. Extemporadio

    "The event, dubbed the 'First National Romney Victory Leadership Retreat'…"

    …because "First National Bank" was already taken.

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      The fuckers probably plan to meet with Mitt once a month, after he's elected.
      (To upload new subroutines.)

  8. BarackMyWorld

    Re-post from earlier (because it applies to this story as well):

    George Will says there isn't too much money in politics because we spend $2 billion on Easter candy. Because politicians are exactly like chocolate bunnies and candy eggs, and should be bought once a year.

    1. flamingpdog

      I would agree with George of the Bowtie if we could bite the ears off of politicians, put them in a basket, and take them back to Mal-Wart if they make us sick (which they will).

  9. SayItWithWookies

    I like how the name of their meeting has "Romney," "Victory" and "Retreat" in it — like he'd ever take one side of a point of view when he could take both.

  10. edgydrifter

    Emphasis on fraternizing. After midnight in the "Victory Suite" it's going to look like a fifty-donor inhuman centipede, with Karl Rove eating $100 bills up front and Mitt extruding golden tablets from his discharge port at the back.

      1. RadioSlut

        I'm out on pass for the next three days and I've already relapsed…..on this addiction.

        1. Extemporadio

          I'd reply to this, but I don't want to act as an enabler. (Dammit!)

          No joke: Computers can be a Gateway drug — stay straight, or I'm gonna stage an Internetvention. (Also, Mumblety will stab your foot.)

    1. rocktonsam

      I wish Lee Atwater was here to kick in the dick. I can only dream of kicking Turdflinger.

    2. flamingpdog

      Get back to work, Radio – my p-ness caught up with yours while you were gone. Good luck building up any p these days.

          1. RadioSlut

            Tx Wooks, i can never express how grateful I am to all my Wonkette friends for getting me a whole lot better.

    3. Fukui-sanRadioBarb

      Hey, dude!! Good to see you!

      I got your letter but I've not replied yet. I'll get on it tomorrow.

      1. RadioSlut

        De nada, mi amigo. They let me out of the clink for a few days and now I'm in the madhouse….go figure.

    1. bikerlaureate

      The suffix "-man" makes a very insulting implication in this instance, and you need to apologize to us human males right now.

  11. Dr. Nick Riviera

    In the last post, Liz wrote:
    "This all brings up a good point. If you are so desperate for the money, so focused on the dollar signs, maybe you will forget that people actually have to like you in order to give you money, and if you ask for money in disgusting, clueless ways, maybe the people will not like you, and then not even give you money when you ask for it in normal, cool ways! Just an idea."

    Actually you don't have to like someone to give them money as this billionaire bash shows. You just have to like what they're going to do for you. Most of these guys probably think Romney is an asshole but they don't care because Romney advances their goals. This is what Republicans very much understand and this is one reason why Republicans win elections despite veering ever closer from evil evil to cartoony evil.

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      "You just have to like what they're going to do for you."

      Precisely. These pricks would be there regardless, checkbooks open, if it was Newt, Tex Goodhair, or even Ricky-poo — although the chance to put one of their own* in the WHite House must especially please them.

      (*Anyone who believes that personal net worth = personal worth.)

    1. edgydrifter

      "When the White House sends out spokesmen to make the case for him on the Sunday morning shows, it's campaign operatives, like David Plouffe and David Axelrod. They more or less spin how he'll win. Where are the heavyweights, the cabinet secretaries, the great men and women of the Democratic Party? Hiding? Unable to make the case? Not trusted to make the case?"

      Or maybe they're doing their fucking jobs. I know, weird.

      1. bobbert

        Isn't it supposed to be traditional that cabinet members DO NOT participate in campaigns? Because, you know, they're supposed to be running the government?

    2. Chichikovovich

      Republicans obsess on [Obama's] eloquence because it allows them to pretend they lost in 2008 because the American people were gulled by pretty words. The truth is he won because he seemed the furthest thing possible from the Republicans who'd presided over two unwon wars and the great recession.

      … And now people like Noonan hope that people can be so deluded as to vote for exactly the same Republicans, advocating exactly the same policies, only to a higher degree and substituting Iran for Iraq.

      1. BarackMyWorld

        Somehow they've concluded that doing the exact same things, but with a new guy, will totally make things different.

        1. Biel_ze_Bubba

          What was that line about doing the same thing over again, and expecting a different result? It had something to do with teabags, I think.

      2. extreme_left

        Just a little note from Down under, Clinton stated she is moving the war machine from Iraq and Afghanistan to Australia/China region and has proven it by starting a Marine base, 3 B-52 bases, 1 Aircraft Carrier Battlegroup base and 1 Submarine Nuclear base here in Australia. Australia is now a Nuclear target thanks to the D's and our own gayness. We had admitted US spy in Parliament and nothing happened, just more proof we work the corner real good.

        1. Biel_ze_Bubba

          Spying on Australia? That must have been just for practice, before moving on to real targets. The Aussie gov't probably helped grade the guy.

          1. extreme_left

            He was central to sacking our Chinese speaking leader so he was more a 'super spy' if you will. Of course one could make a link between the sacking and then our sudden transformation into a nukular armed base but that would be nuts.

          2. extreme_left

            China was no threat to our peaceful existance, it is our number one trade partner, until we decided to become a proxy nukular power which we are now thanks to our professional US arse kissers. Of course the level of stupid it takes to act aggresively to ones most important trade partner is some high quality, A-grade stupid.
            China has already responded by limiting trade, how and if they respond militarily will be interesting, they may not respond at all, after all America needs it's military industrial complex far more than China needs it. It would be funny to see the arms dealers spoiling for a fight to justify their existance and China just saying 'fuck off' we will just keep on manufacturing stuff for Walmart.

    3. BarackMyWorld

      Mr. Romney is looking good, as are his crowds. When the camera shows people in the stands behind him as he speaks, they no longer look as if they walked in off the street or put a bet on a horse and are straining to see if it breaks from the pack. Now they look like people watching their horse take the lead, with no one coming up the outside.

      Substitute the word "good" with "white" in the first sentence and the paragraph makes infinitely more sense.

      1. RedneckMuslin

        " they no longer look as if they walked in off the street or put a bet on a horse and are straining to see if it breaks from the pack."

        Dressage libel!

    4. Butch_Wagstaff

      I only could make it halfway through. The stench of bullshit just became too overwhelming for me.

    5. Fukui-sanRadioBarb

      The president has wrestled for the past six months with themes. He's jumped from one to another. They are:

      It's not so bad—this indicator is up, and that one.

      OK, it's bad, but it could have been worse—my actions kept us from tanking.

      It's bad, but it's Bush's fault.

      It's bad, but it's the congressional Republicans' fault.

      I have made it less bad, and I need more time to make it even less badder.

      All of these things are true. He should definitely further emphasize the point about the Republicans being obstructionist cunts.

      1. Biel_ze_Bubba

        Saw a headline in passing tonite: "Gas headed for $3 a gallon." I can hardly wait for some Faux Newsbabe to deliver an "analysis" of how gas prices are not influenced in any way (as of this week) by White House policy.

        1. Negropolis

          I really hope they aren't going to go with the gas thing. Gas is low compared to most of the Western world to begin with, but this year the prices are pretty much in line with last year. The media's whole laser focus on gas prices is nothing short of amazing. It's required that you forget history (even recent history) to care about the current news stories on it.

          1. Biel_ze_Bubba

            Best to wait and see what gas costs on November 1. Given that a few million morons will cast votes based on that single issue, you'd be a fool not to scoop 'em up.

            Meanwhile, it's fun to replay that Faux News routine where they sat in the studio and simply read aloud "Why is nobody talking about gas prices?", right from the GOP-issued talking points paper, which they were holding in their hands, on camera. Provided a classic moment for Jon Stewart.

  12. RedneckMuslin

    Man, I got such a woody looking at that photo of Rove with a gun to his head. It'll probably last longer than 4 hours.

  13. rickmaci

    If we can't call in a drone strike on a meeting of war criminals, then what the hell good are the damn things!

  14. HogeyeGrex

    Remember when Rove said that after Bush, he'd retire from politics because he'd already done all he wanted?

    Yeah. I figured he was lying too.

  15. flamingpdog

    the internet is all a-twitter

    Waitaminute, I haz the confusez. If the internet is all a-twitter, how come I have the internet but I don't have the twitter? Am I all here?*

    *Don't answer that.

  16. flamingpdog

    I was going to watch the Rove video, but changed my mind and decided to go home and chug a six-pack and then throw up.

  17. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    Yesterday, ThinkProgress reported that Karl Rove, disgusting human being turdblossom . . .


    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      Make that "exceptionally revolting turdblossom." Because your average, run-of-the-mill turdblossom is so much nicer.

  18. Biel_ze_Bubba

    The candidate who will say anything to get elected meets the right-wing billionaires who will pay anything to get him elected. What could possibly go wrong?

    For America, I mean.

  19. TribecaMike

    Homeland Security refuses to acknowledge it, but the actual purpose of fracking is to discover how far down into the molten core Karl Rove's asshole really goes.

    1. NellCote71

      Double triple dittos. (laughing out loud and only halfway through my first drink. Dog has already slunk upstairs.)

  20. GeorgiaBurning

    "First National Romney Victory Leadership Retreat"? Sounds like a bad 80's band getting back together.

  21. extreme_left

    Good to see Rove using initiative to bend the rules for Corporate success.. isn't that what Freedom is all about?

    …apart from the whole idea of 'no coordination' being utter bullshit anyway

    if people are that stupid they can be bought off by endless stupid propoganda bring on global warming.

  22. Antispandex

    Well, as with the Mormons, if there is a law that gets a little too controversial, someone just has a "revelation" and presto! It is labled a "bad law" and goes away (think polygamy here). Karl is just cutting out the middleman. It's called Making Government More Efficient", hippies.

    1. TribecaMike

      If Mitt does gets elected, at noon on inauguration day the Elders will have a sudden revelation that they were wrong about that whole Blacks being equal thing.

  23. arihaya

    and co-founder of the American Crossroads Superpac "

    will I get banned for praying that someone hit Karl Rove with a truck in a crossroad?

    1. Antispandex

      Thanks to Robert Johnson we all know what happens down at the crossroad. I don't know about Mr. Johnson, but I believe it when it comes to Karl.

  24. shortsandpants

    M.C. Rove will soon be rewriting record contracts with his talent. Somehow these contracts will go to Haliburton, though.

      1. Slim_Pickins

        Very good, but personally, I think its low cost producer as opposed to differentiated supplier.

  25. Generation[redacted]

    Give Karl Rove credit for his charitable work. He's running a non-profit social welfare organization. The fact that it only operates during election time is just a coincidence. Nobody (in the SCOTUS 5-4 majority) seriously believes his sole purpose is to elect Republicans to office.

    1. HollidayB

      Seriously, he's a rejected carnaby street wanna be who's still exacting his revenge for people laughing at his polka dot bell bottoms….

      The little piggy should marry his partner grover,… come out come out wherever you are!

  26. DahBoner

    I'm getting drunk with Japanese businessmen right now, but I ain't drunk enuff to know KKKarl Rove is a Christian.

    Because Christians don't lie and bear false witness.


  27. Negropolis

    So, will they be having Victory Gin at their Victory Retreat?

    Tone deaf bastards are tone deaf.

  28. Isyaignert

    Every time I see that fukker's fat, ugly mug, I say to myself, "Shouldn't you be in jail for violating two Congressional subpoenas you fukkin' fuk?"

  29. ttommyunger

    I would watch a video of Rove being nailed to a stump and pushed over backwards. Until you have that one posted, don't bother me with Karl Rove videos, thankyouverymuch.

Comments are closed.