HE RESTS HIS CASE!  3:42 pm June 19, 2012

Joe The Plumber Has Brilliant Analysis Of What Caused The Holocaust

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

What caused the Holocaust? (Or per Business Insider, “Why are the sources of anti-Semitism?”) Well, you could be boring about it and point to the rich vein of anti-Semitism going back to the Middle Ages in those parts of Bavaria where Hitler was strongest, and add in his need for an “other” to blame for Germany’s terrible economic situation after the Treaty of Versailles. But what are you, in grad school? Nope, much better to just go online and see what the militia folks are saying, like “Joe” the “Plumber” did!

Mr. The Plumber, who apparently would like some more attention, please, has a new ad out that explains that gun control caused both the Holocaust and the Armenian genocide. That is some First Class trolling there, Joe, but you forgot one tiny, teeny thing:

Jews don’t do guns.

[Via ThinkProgress]

 
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{ 265 comments }

DrunkIrishman June 19, 2012 at 3:44 pm

Could you imagine Jews with guns? I'm guessing there would be a lot of friendly fire.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:49 pm

I'm sure they'd trade shots.

At a discount.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Your move, Menachem Begin.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Dunno, ask the Lebanese, I think they found the fire to be very unfriendly.

DrunkIrishman June 19, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Israeli Jews so don't count.

finallyhappy June 19, 2012 at 7:16 pm

My uncles- but they are all dead now- fought -with guns in WWII. At least 2 of them had guns and hunted(yes, hunted animals) after they returned.

sewollef June 20, 2012 at 8:29 am

My dad fought with guns also, too. 'Cept it was a effing big gun with lots of armoured steel around it and an engine at the back.

He had a silly name for his gun gang…. something like, 7th Armoured Division of the 8th Army. Doesn't exactly roll off the tongue that name. I preferred 'Desert Rats'.

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:02 pm

If only Anne Frank had a My First AK-47, she might not have thought people were really good at heart and that's the real tragedy for Herr(-less) Plumber.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:08 pm

Jews, Israelis, what difference does it make?

Negropolis June 20, 2012 at 2:07 am

Says the drunk Irishman. lol

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 3:45 pm

What caused the Holocaust? (Or per Business Insider, “Why are the sources of anti-Semitism?”)

Or, per Sonja (@sweden), "Whats the fuzz with jews?"

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Well, see, Sonja, some sects of Judiaism do not allow men to shave their face–

Oh, you meant "fuss"…

MosesInvests June 19, 2012 at 6:38 pm

That's very different. Never mind.

Antispandex June 19, 2012 at 7:46 pm

" What caused the Holocaust?"

That's so easy. Obama, of course!

nounverb911 June 19, 2012 at 3:46 pm

Do plumbers "Plump" when you grill them?

HogeyeGrex June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

I don't know, but I'd bet they scream if you put them in the oven.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Would I toin da gas on if my friend Joe was in dere, Doc?

Chet Kincaid June 19, 2012 at 4:14 pm

What the fuck, you guys?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:17 pm

Everybody screams when you put them in the oven.

HogeyeGrex June 19, 2012 at 6:35 pm

Even mimes?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:38 pm

They do jazz hands.

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:03 pm

I do know you can fit thousands of them in the ash try of a Volkswagen.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

I don't know, let's find out!

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Because if there's one thing Jews have always done well, it's shoot people.

ChernobylSoup June 19, 2012 at 3:48 pm

And if Joe the Plumber had a plumber's license he'd be a plumber.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

If his name was, you know, Joe.

ChernobylSoup June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Now you're just being pedantic.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:58 pm

I deny the charge. She told me she was eighteen

Crank_Tango June 19, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Allegedly.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Sorry, but I don't believe for one minute that he knows a fucking thing about the Armenian genocide.

Doktor Zoom June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

He knows as much about the Armenian genocide as he does about the reasons for the Holocaust.

Fukui-sanRadioBarb June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

Or, frankly, anything apart from "Does Joe get the moneys? Joe does? Joe likey."

Crank_Tango June 19, 2012 at 5:34 pm

All caused by liberals, done and done.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

He's heard about it because he's from the same state as Mean Jean Schmidt and her Armenian-Holocaust-Denial Machine, apparently he didn't quite understand that the party line was it never happened.

ChernobylSoup June 19, 2012 at 3:53 pm

It's okay, neither do Turkish school kids.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

Very winnish.

edgydrifter June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

He thinks the Armenians were those blue dudes from Avatar and that they totally deserved to be wiped out for being filthy savage space Commies.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

…who were tree-huggers, to boot!!!

Dashboard Buddha June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Hey knows as much as the holocaust and Armenian genocide as he does the requirement to become an actual plumber.

boobookitteh June 19, 2012 at 4:09 pm

I guess he didn't get the memo from Condi that it never happened.
http://www.armenianweekly.com/2011/11/04/condi-ri

PubOption June 19, 2012 at 4:16 pm

If he knew that Kardashian was an Armenian name, would he still feel the same way about the genocide?

Geminisunmars June 19, 2012 at 4:50 pm

More importantly, would he still feel the same about the Kardashians.

Biel_ze_Bubba June 19, 2012 at 5:19 pm

He knows that
(1) if you get genocided, it's because you didn't have enough guns, and
(2) if you didn't have enough guns, it was because of gun control.

So simple, even a plumber can figure it out.

Gleem McShineys June 19, 2012 at 5:29 pm

(Psst ixnay on the umber-play, I kinda didn't get the license!)
I MEAN OH UM, LOOK OVER THERE, GUN CONTROL GENOCIDERS!

miss_grundy June 19, 2012 at 10:17 pm

He's a hillbilly from Ohio, he doesn't know shit!

Callyson June 20, 2012 at 3:03 am

Turkey instituted gun control…hence their genocide against Armenians. Guess it makes sense in Wingnutland…

sewollef June 20, 2012 at 8:36 am

So, Joe thinks there was too much 'gun control' — during war time? Of fucking course there was gun control…. controlled by the occupying German army.

Who does this moran think he is, a fucking plumber?

nounverb911 June 19, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Why does "Joe the Plumber" hate tomatoes? Can we train them to shoot back?

elviouslyqueer June 19, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Faster, Brandywine, KILL! KILL!

flamingpdog June 19, 2012 at 4:33 pm

They can be trained to kill.

elviouslyqueer June 19, 2012 at 4:48 pm

I win!

flamingpdog June 19, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Free wallpapers???

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 3:49 pm

Something else not-Joe the not-Plumber forgot. The Jewish population of Germany in the 30s was well below 1% of the overall population. Shooting back wasn't gonna get them very far.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

Greatest war machine in history (up to that point) v. a bunch of guys in tefilin running around with revolvers.

These guys just don't get it, do they?

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

It's a thing with them, the whole not getting anything.

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 4:12 pm

Progressives are the master race – the Fourth Reich!

MissTaken June 19, 2012 at 5:54 pm

Oh for fuck's sake.

Lemme guess! Nazi's are liberals because it says Socialism right in their name. Right?

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 6:48 pm

Case in point.

swordfis June 19, 2012 at 7:32 pm

Why don't you go back to licking the balls of Dead Breitbart, you malevolent troglodyte?

Doktor Zoom June 19, 2012 at 3:57 pm

If the Jews in Germany had been armed, they could have at least filmed ads showing them shooting a copy of the Nuremberg Laws.

Geminisunmars June 19, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Well, the teflon would make the bullets just slide off, wouldn't it?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:18 pm

And of that tiny number, a significant portion were female, or children below the age to, you know, effectively murder other people. Jesus, these people, what the FUCK is wrong with them?

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 6:06 pm

"Jesus, these people, what the FUCK is wrong with them? "

They are not perfect like we liberals!

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 6:50 pm

What a stinging rebuke! Witless sarcasm defeats grade-school math!

swordfis June 19, 2012 at 7:33 pm

Don't you get enough attention by masturbating in front of school playgrounds?

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 8:10 pm

You speak from experience, as if you are part of the Occupy Schoolyard group.

RayneMan June 19, 2012 at 3:50 pm

What a tool.

Specifically, a plunger.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Not a bumwad?

Barrelhse June 20, 2012 at 11:30 am

The snake!

SayItWithWookies June 19, 2012 at 3:50 pm

Wait — I thought affordable healthcare caused the holocaust.

HogeyeGrex June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

No, no. Affordable healthcare is the Holocaust.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:02 pm

Wait, so if we abolished gun control we'd have single payer?

Wow. That's a tough call….

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:23 pm

If we abolish gun control, we won't need health care.

NotMother June 19, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Nope. It's the possibility of hedge fund managers losing their carried interest tax exemptions.

Swampgas_Man June 19, 2012 at 5:48 pm

No, allowing women to control their own reproductive cycle is the holocaust. My preacher done told me!

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Wait more–I thought it was the homos?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Well, ERbody knows the Ho-Moes are the root cause of civilization's discontents.

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:33 pm

We've been around for a long, long time and helped many a man seal his fate. . .woo woo woo. . .

elviouslyqueer June 19, 2012 at 4:34 pm

No no. We're causing white people to die off in droves, remember?

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Settle down, kids. We did ALL that and more and still found time to give your Boy Scout a reacharound!

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:11 pm

Busy, busy, busy.

DemmeFatale June 19, 2012 at 7:45 pm

I thought you were too busy destroying marriage to kill whitey!

extreme_left June 19, 2012 at 7:52 pm

I thought Communism caused it.

Fukui-sanRadioBarb June 19, 2012 at 3:50 pm

If I were to attempt a parody of the idiocy of "gun lovin', rootin' tootin' Americans" in the most classless way possible then I couldn't even come close to the fake plumber.

That's an achievement, I suppose.

RayneMan June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

I wonder if he and Ted Nugent swap spit? Actually, no I don't *vomits*

Funny thing is, he's from Ohio, as am I. We're not exactly known for being a "gun lovin', rootin' tootin'" area. So, having said that, to whom is he pandering? *mind-boggled*

Fukui-sanRadioBarb June 19, 2012 at 4:00 pm

He's pandering to the Americans who exist in his own mind. Which is sort of scary.

noodlesalad June 19, 2012 at 3:51 pm

I think idiot skinhead plumbers who did the piping for the showers had more to do with it.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:59 pm

They would have had names like Wurzelbacher, no doubt.

noodlesalad June 19, 2012 at 4:08 pm

And they definitely would have loved the homeland.

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 4:23 pm

And guns. I bet they owned lots of guns.

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:11 pm

J the P would not have been 'a good German,' he would have been 'The Best German.'

Tommy1733 June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Pass the Lord and praise the ammunition.

Dashboard Buddha June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Heyyyy…them are some nice bullets you got there.

NellCote71 June 19, 2012 at 5:31 pm

Is that a bullet, or are you just happy to see me? (inside reference to an ex-husband).

BoatOfVelociraptors June 20, 2012 at 1:03 am

Well, any time you bust out the vibe…

An_Outhouse June 19, 2012 at 2:52 pm

I fear Jews with guns less than I do cows with guns. Burger King is the real holocaust.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm
BarackMyWorld June 19, 2012 at 4:09 pm
GeorgiaMike December 3, 2012 at 11:01 am

But Chic-fil-A is fighting on the side of the cows, except for the ones that caught teh gay.

bikerlaureate June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

When scapegoats are outlaws, only outlaws… uh, wait, I know this one…

Eve8Apples June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

A fake plumber and a pretend world history scholar. Joe's the whole package alright. A big package.

BarackMyWorld June 19, 2012 at 4:02 pm

A big package?

I figured he was into guns to compensate for something.

RayneMan June 19, 2012 at 4:14 pm

I think, this time, the package is in the rear.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:43 pm

Package of WtF????

BoatOfVelociraptors June 20, 2012 at 1:04 am

I resemble that remark!

John Birf Society June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

On behalf of my people, I thank you, Joe! Now someone will speak for the Jews.

Spurning Beer June 19, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Yes. Jew the Plumber.

HempDogbane June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

Do I have to watch the video to comment that Joe is a real Dick?

timbo71351 June 19, 2012 at 4:09 pm

No, and JoeNotaPlumber is too stupid to turn off the like and dislike button on his YouTube clips.

LastGasp June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

There was gun control… in Nazi Germany?
[insert laugh that goes on for a dozen lines here]
Seriously, the Nazis were all about guns, guns, and more guns.

BarackMyWorld June 19, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Nazi gun control = control your gun so you have a better chance of hitting Jews.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 4:12 pm

Yes there was, but the grain of truth has been well mashed and incorporated in a few pounds of lies.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:32 pm

A very interesting site. Thank you.

sewollef June 20, 2012 at 8:49 am

And of course that grain of truth [very interesting site, btw], became irrelevant following the annexation of Austria and the subsequent blitzkrieg of Poland.

Even assuming that the Poles were a well-armed people [they weren't], the professional Polish army was swept aside by the speed, ferociousness and overwhelming might of the German invasion, I shudder to think what kind of response would have been meted out to a lightly-armed civilian revolt.

Oh that's right, the Warsaw ghetto uprising dealt with that, at a time when the Germans had moved most of their elite troops, armor and weapons to the Eastern Front to counter the advancing Russians, they still crushed the uprising with limited resources. Although those resources were SS-Commando groups.

Still, over 13,000 Jews armed with handguns, molotov cocktails and the odd rifle, died as the ghetto was firebombed to oblivion. The surviving 50,000 were shipped to Treblinka extermination camp.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 3:54 pm

And if unarmed tomatoes had come to kill the Jews and the Armenians, they probably would not have even needed guns to fend them off; they could have just squished them while doing some kind of klezmer dance.

BoatOfVelociraptors June 20, 2012 at 1:07 am

http://www.bing.com/search?q=tomato+fight+in+spai

Those unarmed tomatoes re-live the holocaust every year. Mass slaughter in the public square of a European city.

Doktor Zoom June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Given his record, I wouldn't have expected him to even Shoah little knowledge or decency on this topic, either.

finallyhappy June 19, 2012 at 7:19 pm

Ok, how many Wonketteers got that one?

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:38 pm

All of them, Katie.

Wilcoxyz June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Yes, but you know who did have have access to guns, besides Custer, the South and the folks at Waco?

CapnRadio June 19, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Sure, everyone wants gun control. But at what HoloCOST‽

/subtlety

BarackMyWorld June 19, 2012 at 4:07 pm
Dashboard Buddha June 19, 2012 at 3:56 pm

I can easily imagine Jews with guns. It's a little thing I like to call Israel.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:34 pm

This is why I will always support the existence of the state of Israel, even as I argue against Israeli state policy towards the Palestinian people.

LionHeartSoyDog June 19, 2012 at 6:00 pm

If there was going to be a state of Israel after WW2, they should have taken a chunk of Germany.
Why make the Palestinian people suffer for the crimes of the German Nazis?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:08 pm

While I agree that most of the attempted genocide against the Jews after the Diaspora came at the hands of Europeans, surely the victims themselves would not have been comfortable remaining in a divided and torn country filled with ugly memories. We (the people of the world) gave them a flawed solution and we have all, the Palestinian people most of all, suffered ever since.

Michael Chabon's The Yiddish Policemen's Union posits a different solution, not one that I'm advocating either. It's an interesting read, if you haven't already read it.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 7:16 pm

Because Balfour had promised a Jewish homeland in Israel in 1917, which helped motivate the efforts of Zionists to encourage Jews to move into the area and in some cases fight.

BarackMyWorld June 19, 2012 at 3:59 pm

I mentioned this earlier, but I thought the official wingnut line on the Holocaust was God let the Holocaust happen so the Jews could get Israel back and allow the end-times to begin.

Or is that just the crazy Revelation-zealot wingnut reason? I think I might be getting my wingnut classifications confused.

Chichikovovich June 19, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Well, shoor. But he tossed in a lesson about the importance of a home arsenal for self-protection too. It's hard being Divine Providence, you need to multi-task.

scvirginia June 19, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Nope, I think you got it about right. Now they're just waiting for the pure red calf, & then something, something, mosque destruction, something else, Muslims, something, Rapture, something else, End Times, the END.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Looking forward to the Post-Rapture scavenger hunt – cars, food, water, guns -to fight the final battle. DAMIENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!

scvirginia June 19, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Love that bumper sticker: "when the rapture comes, can I have your car?"

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Yes, but, see, if those goddamn Jooz (whom we totally support) had been armed, they could've fought back against the 99% non-Jews with whom they shared a nation, thereby disobeying GAWD's word and … DANGER DANGER DANGER

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Careful, you're overloading!

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:13 pm

I swear to god sometimes when I'm reading their shit I think I'm gonna pop an artery.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 7:21 pm

Remember when McCain had to unaccept John Hagee's endorsement after audio surfaced of him saying this:

“Then God sent a hunter. A hunter is someone with a gun and he forces you. Hitler was a hunter. And the Bible says – Jeremiah writing ? ‘They shall hunt them from every mountain and from every hill and from the holes of the rocks,’ meaning there’s no place to hide. And that might be offensive to some people but don’t let your heart be offended. I didn’t write it, Jeremiah wrote it. It was the truth and it is the truth. How did it happen? Because God allowed it to happen. Why did it happen? Because God said my top priority for the Jewish people is to get them to come back to the land of Israel.”

Doktor Zoom June 19, 2012 at 3:59 pm

Be fair. Joe lost family in the Holocaust. His grandfather died at Auschwitz….

…falling out of a guard tower.

weejee June 19, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Joe's pipe needz moar sweating.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:46 pm

EWWWWWWWWWWW.

Spurning Beer June 19, 2012 at 5:52 pm

What the flux?

bobbert June 19, 2012 at 11:41 pm

I have a tube bender just his size.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 4:03 pm

The Jews seem to do a pretty good job with F-16s and Mirage III's, too.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Not all Jews are Israelis, and not all Israelis are Jews.

Allmighty_Manos June 19, 2012 at 4:03 pm

Word War II could have been prevented if both sides had guns.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:37 pm

See, if only we hadn't had gun control, back then …

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:46 pm

Zactly!

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:05 pm

Actually, Joe has it wrong: Hitler actually relaxed gun control laws.

SayItWithWookies June 19, 2012 at 4:23 pm

Zis contradiction uff ze narrative vill not be tolerated.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Not according to the site GunCite, cited by sullivanst, above. Apparently, according to an apparently well-researched article at that site, Hitler tightened gun control laws in 1938.

glamourdammerung June 19, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Actually, there is another article I read (at the same site and possibly by the same author if my memory is correct) about how they did loosen private ownership. But again, they were going off the 1928 laws which also loosened private ownership (since the original laws had no rules to allow private ownership at all). The 1928 law required registration and presumably would have kept the Nazis from owning guns (since they had to be "law abiding" and most of their leadership did time for that whole "Beer Hall Putsch" debacle).

And the 1938 rewriting of the 1928 law lowered the age of legal ownership and removed pretty much all non-handgun weapon restrictions. Which is not even that odd that handguns had restrictions considering pistols have been heavily regulated in that area since the Holy Roman Empire.

But of course, the myth that the 1968 Gun Control Act was translated from German (specifically the imaginary Nazi gun ban law) is an article of faith among a good chunk of the lunatic fringe.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Thank you. I would ask you if you had a link to the specific RWNJs spouting this drivel, but I'm quite sick of reading their garbage right now.

MumbletyRadio June 19, 2012 at 4:05 pm

Well, you could be boring about it

I for one welcome our new Over-bored's!

(not really)

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Funny how right-wingers keep on pushing this ahistoric line.

Fun fact: Nazi Germany actually had relatively lax gun laws (for non-Jews). Simiarly, Saddam Hussein's Iraq actually had compulsary gun ownership by citizens. Contra the right-wing/neoconfederate insurrectionist theory of the Second Amendment, all those guns did bupkis in terms of armed uprisings that successfully deposed dicatators and tyrants.

Why, it's enough to lead one to believe that effective social control, mass-censorship of dissent, and deploying broad police powers against the same, backed up by a massive military complex relative to the populace, somehow manage to stifle dissent long before they reach the point of active revolt.

Speaking of which, how does (yet another) Joe feel about a free and independent press? What about war critics?

fuflans June 19, 2012 at 4:24 pm

dude. history, facts, we're talking about wingtards here.

extreme_left June 19, 2012 at 8:02 pm

Facts are just the playground of elitist UN types.

As for stifling dissent, nothing like taking our historical figures of rebellion and turning them into obsequious hobbo's as I saw in Ridley Scott's flacid 'Robin Hood', the whole 'steal from the rich and give to the poor' was a side note and hood was turned into a nice peasant boy who knew the importance of having a nice Lord of the manor.

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 8:55 pm

You know, there's actually a decent narrative by which Robin Hood was some terrible wingnut tax protester.

Think about it: the "Good King" Richard the Lionhearted racks up an enormous debt while going off to have a foreign adventure. Prince John is left in his place, and has a fucking kingdom to run. So what does he do? He raises taxes, to pay for shit. So, what does that make Robin Hood and his bandits, in this version?

extreme_left June 19, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Depends if Hood was down with Military expansion, i'm guessing he wasn't. The vast majority of Taxtards are all for Military expansion funded by cutting Civilian Government to offset cut's in taxes, as seen in the only sane part of Daddy Pauls platform, that is Military minimisation, getting roundly crushed recently.

not that Radio June 20, 2012 at 8:45 am

You know who else was named Joe and disapproved of war criticism/free press?

Truantly_Joe June 20, 2012 at 10:46 am

Joe Miller?
Joe Lieberman?
Joe Walsh?
Joe Arpaio?
Joe McCarthy?
Joe Barton?
Joe Wilson?
Joe Scarborough?
Joe Vogler?
Joe Piscapo? (I mean, presumably)

not that Radio June 20, 2012 at 11:02 am

You shouldn't include Joe Piscopo in that list. His father included him in that list once. ONCE.

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

Shouldn't the music be a little less peppy? Or does ominous cost more?

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

OT but related to earlier post, Kennedy Institute tells Scott Brown to fuck off.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Wish I'd said that.

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:51 pm

What a pussy he is!

miss_grundy June 19, 2012 at 10:30 pm

Actually, he's a tosser, a twat and a little scared bitch.

Estproph June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

I'm going to start calling him Mr. The Plumber. Too good to pass up. Joe the Plumber, along with his sister Josephine, and brother Liquid.

HippieEsq June 19, 2012 at 4:10 pm

As accurate as the time he said Obama's election would be "the end of Israel".

Weenus299 June 19, 2012 at 4:11 pm

What the fuck caused kamikazes?

Blueb4sunrise June 19, 2012 at 4:19 pm

Ummm, gun control in Korea?

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Equal pay for women, obvs.

HarryButtle June 19, 2012 at 5:45 pm

A tanker truck full of vodka crashed into a truck full of limes just as a plane loaded with Triple Sec crashed on the same spot?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:32 pm

Constipation.

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:51 pm

Teh gheyz, duh.

ShreditorsDesk June 19, 2012 at 4:11 pm

I'd bet dollars for donuts Joe's mom's mitochondrial DNA carries the dreaded 'jew curse'!

Gopherit June 19, 2012 at 4:16 pm

With Joe the Plumber in congress, no fruit is safe……metaphorically speaking.

Chichikovovich June 19, 2012 at 4:16 pm

There were events of armed resistance. For example Czech resistors killed Reinhard Heydrich, who was a Hitler golden boy running Czechslovakia. And what happened?

[Wikipedia:
On 9 June, after discussions with Himmler and Karl Hermann Frank, Hitler ordered brutal reprisals. Over 13,000 people were arrested, deported, and imprisoned. Beginning on 10 June, all males over the age of 16 in the village of Lidice, 22 km north-west of Prague, and the village of Ležáky, were murdered. All the women in Ležáky were also murdered. All but four of the women from Lidice were deported immediately to Ravensbrück concentration camp (four were pregnant – they were forcibly aborted at the same hospital where Heydrich had died and then sent to the concentration camp). A number of children were chosen for Germanization, but 81 were killed in gas vans at the Chełmno extermination camp. Both towns were burned and the ruins of Lidice were levelled. At least 1,300 people were massacred after Heydrich's death.

If only the people of Lidice and Ležáky had assault weapons in their basements they would have been fine?

And there was the shooting of the diplomat vom Rath in Paris. In response to which Hitler unleashed Kristallnacht. But that was in 1938, before the time when, according to Joe the Historian, Germany imposed gun control. So the Jewish community in Germany could defend themselves, right? No government would dare take on armed patriots. That's not how I remember my readings about Kristallnacht, but my history books are obviously anti-2nd Amendment propaganda.

johnnyzhivago June 19, 2012 at 5:10 pm

Nobody said you wouldn't get your hair mussed!!

Fukui-sanRadioBarb June 19, 2012 at 5:30 pm

You are attempting to read far too much into this man's "thought" process.

TBH it's insulting to anyone whose talents extend to such ridiculously elite things like "reading"

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:35 pm

Ur a godam eleetess relynig on books and that stuff lkei that bcos even aBush an I dont agre wtih him sed he kneow thigns fron his gut, in his gut he know them.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 7:38 pm

Let's not forget the Night of the Long Knives, when Hitler had Ernst Röhm murdered. Being head of an entire (well-armed) militia did Röhm no good.

Soylent Green June 19, 2012 at 4:17 pm

Silly numbnuts, facts are for kids: The Holocaust was caused by christian conservatives wielding guns who perceived Jews as inferior as stated by their religion.

extreme_left June 19, 2012 at 8:15 pm

.. to say nothing on the long glorious history of Christian progroms against Jews with a fun fact being the English first introduced the yellow star accessory. The progrom got it's start by Christians not being allowed to lend money so they went to tha Joos for cash, then when the Joos wouldn't lend any more they were massacred or run out of town in the name of the Lord. A great debt solution, just kill the holder of the loan.

One wonders how many Joos were owed cash to finance all those concrete highways of the Third Reich… seeing as the Reich was built on debt.. like another Reich.

ChrisM2011 June 19, 2012 at 4:19 pm

Yes, if Anne Frank had only been packing a few 9mm and went all Jovovich on those germans the world would've been a different place.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:48 pm

Needs moar Alice.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Yes, armed resistance to ethnic cleansing has always worked

poorgradstudent June 19, 2012 at 4:22 pm

If I can have a snark-free moment? Thank you.

For starters, this is just like the bullshit that they always crap out whenever a horrible shooting massacre happens. No matter how much you want to think otherwise, a majority of people do not do not turn into John McClane in the middle of a potentially violent situation involving weapons, especially if your only exposure to firearm combat is the shooting range and the occasional round of "Call of Duty." As an ancillary to that, if you think you could stand up to the World War II-era German army with just your trusty rifle, well, be my guest. I mean, there was Jewish armed resistance to the Nazis, but even they with more resources than you can probably get even at a gun show didn't stop the Holocaust.

Second, quite a few of the first Jews who ended up in concentration camps were members of the Polish army – and, hey, THEY HAD GUNS!

Third, if you actually knew anything about the Holocaust and the historical consensus about how it could happen, you would realize that one of the MAJOR POINTS in Holocaust studies is that the Nazis made things worse by increments, and took advantage of the fact that they were acting against a minority already wearily accustomed to even official persecution, so that by the time many people realized that Nazi anti-Semitism wasn't something that would just pass over they were already having their property taken away and forced into the ghettos.

That's actually considered one of the biggest yet less obvious lessons of the Holocaust, and has been echoed in works like THE HANDMAID'S TALE ever since: that modern governments that wish to take freedom away from a minority do so gradually. Hey, isn't that the whole reason why wingers like Joe the Plumber say we can't have universal health care and high-speed rail projects – because it would lead to SOCIALISM and then the gulags? Sounds like Joe's not all that confident in the ability of the Second Amendment to protect us after all.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:26 pm

the Nazis made things worse by increments, and took advantage of the fact that they were acting against a minority already wearily accustomed to even official persecution

Sorta like Americans under W.

MrFizzy June 20, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Stop making sense – America is simply not the correct venue for this kind of thing.

jerichothedrifter June 19, 2012 at 4:24 pm

I dunno, Jews did pretty doggone well with guns in the Warsaw Ghetto uprising. Too bad it was too late by then.

I really thought this dumbass was gonna disappear by now.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Another thing we can thank John McCain for.

Baconzgood June 19, 2012 at 4:26 pm

That tomato shoulda armed its self.

greenide1 June 19, 2012 at 4:26 pm

So the victims are to blame because they aren't violent, gun-toting assholes like the aggressors? Hmm. I guess that means Wonkette readers are responsible for the current House of Representatives…

rickmaci June 19, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Sooo, I guess the f *ing Turks caused the Kardashians? Thanks Joe.

I love the new history where you just make shit up and then pretend it really happened. Used to be people like that got locked up in a hospital and treated. Now we are putting them in Congress.

fuflans June 19, 2012 at 4:30 pm

has anybody left a worse campaign legacy than john mccain?

Limeylizzie June 19, 2012 at 4:37 pm

Hitler.

MOG2410 June 19, 2012 at 4:50 pm

Always.

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Eva Braun didn't appear on DWTS and get her own reality show.

bobbert June 19, 2012 at 11:54 pm

Reagan and W, for two, but of course that's partly because they won.

Negropolis June 20, 2012 at 2:30 am

Nixon ranks up there.

owhatever June 19, 2012 at 4:39 pm

I luvz the America, cause over here, I can put on safety glasses and earmuffs and shoot a tomato.

That would not have been possible back when they took the guns away from Turkeys. The tomatoes ran wild and killed every Jew in Germany. Then the Russians bombed Pearl Harbor.

PubOption June 19, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Not plain old earmuffs, but mirror image earmuffs (see at about 16 seconds), also note that he is shooting tomatoes with a shotgun, so not much need for accuracy.

widestanceromance June 19, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Why is Joe ignoring the obvious: a certain Jew would have shot up the Romans like so much swiss cheese–IF he only had been packing. And then maybe some weird-ass religion with an execution device as a logo would never have been smeared across the planet. Oh, wait. He likes that part.

Ryy June 19, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Jonah Goldberg says it was liberals that caused the holocaust…. is Joe calling him a liar!?

DeathOfIrony June 19, 2012 at 5:10 pm

One thing for sure, Nazi Germany was really afraid of people that had guns. They overran France and the low country because the French were armed with baguettes and tried to stop the blitzkrieg by sending mimes to the border to fool the Germans into thinking there was an invisible wall there.

BTW what kind of punk-ass dinky shotgun was that? I'd be afraid to take on a squirrel with that pea-shooter Joe.

Oh, and you suck, douchebag…

johnnyzhivago June 19, 2012 at 5:12 pm

I'm waiting for the Downfall Parody of this before I make any further comments.

OneYieldRegular June 19, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Joe the Plumber? Sounds more like Joe the Just Scratches the Surface.

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Tarantino's next flick: "Joe The Opprobrious Basterd."

Nostrildamus June 19, 2012 at 5:22 pm

It doesn't surprise me Joe can't pronounce "Armenians", but Christ, you'd think that maybe someone on the production crew might. Guess not.

These people are morons. Every single one of them.

coolhandnuke June 19, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Joe is just following the NRA's recipe for salsa.

scvirginia June 19, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Hope he's not lookin' for spicy- those jalapenos are hard to hit from a distance…

coolhandnuke June 19, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Jalapenos are way too ethnic for gun nuts. The NRA recipe calls for pepper spray and gun powder as the spices.

valthemus June 19, 2012 at 5:55 pm

I get it… the problem was always the gun control laws, not some army of assholes following the orders of an egomaniacal sociopath. Named Karl Rove.

We *must* get to the bottom of Fast and Furious! Our freedom to shoot blood-thirsty tomatoes depends on it!

HarryButtle June 19, 2012 at 5:56 pm

Used to be that history was written by the victors. Now it's just written and rewritten by any fucktard who can hold a crayon.

YouBetcha June 19, 2012 at 5:56 pm

Sometimes, I think Palin was the worst thing McCain unleashed on us. Then, we hear from Joe the Unlicensed Plumber. It's a hard call. Tie, maybe?

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 6:16 pm

I'd like to. To a shark cage. In a swimming pool, of course.

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 5:59 pm

You know the Nazis had pieces of flair they made the Jews wear.

MissTaken June 19, 2012 at 6:02 pm

How many Joe the Plumber for Congress ads are just him trying to tell the voters to vote for that Sam Wurzelbacher guy and not Joe the Plumber?

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 7:10 pm

It's gonna be quite hilarious seeing Marcy Kaptur's margin of victory in November.

randcoolcatdaddy June 19, 2012 at 6:28 pm

Who is giving this excuse for a sludge pool money to run for office? That's like encouraging and outbreak of botulism.

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 6:29 pm

Next time I run into a Holocaust-denier, I'm just going to whip out a shotgun and shoot them. Thanks for the tip, Joe! Say, can I share your parent's basement with you while I'm on the run? Just until the statue of limitation runs out.

smokefilledroommate June 19, 2012 at 6:49 pm

This is as bad as the Cain/Mark Block ad. You got Sam the Idiot babbling about Armenians, Jews, the Holocaust and some imagined direct correlation to gun rights, all while blowing the shit out of a few fruits and vegetables with a shotgun.

Nostrildamus June 19, 2012 at 6:57 pm

The real reason the Armenians got clobbered was that General Lando Calrissian was preoccupied in Cloud City.

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 7:16 pm

Uproarious Update from Think Progress:

Hunter Walker at the New York Observer reached out to Wurzelbacher’s spokesperson, who only worsened the comparisons, comparing gun control to slavery as well:

Phil Christofanelli [said] “there’s nothing offensive” about the video and discussed how gun control may have led to slavery in the United States too…. “Well, blacks weren’t allowed to own guns in the south, that’s a historical fact as well,” said Mr. Christofanelli. “So, it would seem that the argument would apply there as well.” http://thinkprogress.org/election/2012/06/19/5023

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 7:23 pm

He's not going to win the support of his Republican base if he starts advocating giving guns to the blahs.

finallyhappy June 19, 2012 at 7:23 pm

I'm sure the Klan and the American Nazi Party agree.

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Blacks weren't allowed to read in the South, either. And yet, these guys never seem terribly worked up about literacy or education.

bobbert June 19, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Good grief, he has a spokesperson who may be more stupid that he is. There may be no lower bound.

finallyhappy June 19, 2012 at 7:26 pm

http://www.facebook.com/phil.christofanelli Is he still in college at Wash u?

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 7:42 pm

Has Rand Paul offered him an internship yet?

Chow Yun Flat June 19, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Not a good day for Hannah Arendt.

__kth__ June 19, 2012 at 8:34 pm

"Gun control made the Holocaust possible" is as old as the hills. It's something you've heard a dozen times, if you know a lot of stupid people. I'm concerned that Wonkette lacks acquaintance with this key demographic (the stupids, that is). Also envious.

rmjagg June 19, 2012 at 11:29 pm

listening to joe the plumber is like face-fucking an edsel . just awful

ttommyunger June 20, 2012 at 7:06 am

Sorry, I must get technical here: only a complete fucking idiot keeps his ammo in his weak hand pocket, passing rounds from one hand to another prior to loading, thereby unnecessarily risking dropping a round in the process. Once again, trying to look cool and coming off as a fuck-up, keep up the good work, Joe.

Dr_pangloss June 20, 2012 at 1:16 pm

From 1492 to present millions of indians were not arming themselves with firearms and were subesquently overrun, murdered in cold blood and deported. I guess they should have developed guns first. I Love 'Merica.

Troubledog June 21, 2012 at 1:46 am

I pawned my guns to a Jew once, and it didn't stop any Holocausts.

garryboldwater August 29, 2012 at 2:12 pm

You know why I don't ask plumber's what they think about the Holocaust? For the same reason I don't call history professors to unclog my shitter.

Peckerwood_Pete August 30, 2012 at 11:49 am

Asking Joe the Plumber his input on historical events is akin to asking your history professor from college to come fix that clogged up commode in your shithouse.

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 5:58 pm

Also too, Robert Byrd was in the Klan!!!! Chappaquiddick!!!

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 6:05 pm

No, we liberals really are vastly superior to those knuckle-dragging conservatives! Just read the posts here!

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 8:08 pm

We progressives know that preSScott buSSh advised Hitler on forming his Schutzstaffel.

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:33 pm

Ooh look, it's a new troll!

miss_grundy June 19, 2012 at 10:18 pm

That's what dumb republicans think. But again, what do they know.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Edvard Munch libel!

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 7:54 pm

Easy for you to (virtually) say.

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 8:02 pm

It's not that hard… say "moon" quickly and add a k, and you basically have it.

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 8:07 pm

Chappaquiddick? Why bring the architect of the wildly successful NCLB into this?

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 8:09 pm

What are you talking about?

We progressives are really nice people. Genteel and such.

MittBorg June 19, 2012 at 8:13 pm

Very funny, sullivanst. You make the ha-ha, yes?

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 8:17 pm

*bobs head while grinning with both hands flat in front of his mouth*

starfanglednut June 19, 2012 at 8:30 pm

Sully is very funny. I

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Actually, a very old one, with a history of abusing the comments system to harrass the bejesus out of people, and then crying intolerance when he finally got banned.

If our editrix is reading this, I just want to say that America's justice system, flawed as it is, is probably correct in concluding that some people are beyond rehabilitation.

CivicHoliday June 19, 2012 at 9:50 pm

We probably should be occupying schoolyards, what with so many conservative governors trying to blame public school teachers for their state's financial woes. But you wouldn't know anything about any of that because my guess is you have Glenn Beck's chalkboard so far up your ass that you can only spew talking points.

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 9:50 pm

IOW, burn the witch! Burn him now!

"some people are beyond rehabilitation"

A great example might be the author of this statement below, swordfis:

"Why don't you go back to licking the balls of Dead Breitbart, you malevolent troglodyte?"

not that Radio June 20, 2012 at 8:40 am

Under the new system, only smokefilledroommate, Negropolis and Radiotherapy get banned. Trolls are allowed to roam free.

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 9:56 pm

What's with the obsession with the male ass?

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 10:01 pm

IOW, burn the witch! Burn him now!

Are we quoting Monty Python now, because I have one, too:

"Help, help, I'm being oppressed!"

Also, I fail to see how swordfis's entirely accurate description for those just tuning in, and a suggestion that you return to your favorite passtime qualifies as unseemly.

NY9 Solyndra June 19, 2012 at 10:07 pm

That burning, turgid rage you choke with both hands is about to explode all over your keyboard.

Truantly_Joe June 19, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Hey now. I can't fault a fella for having an active fantasy life, and I have to admit I'm oddly flattered in a way, but let's try and keep it G-rated, okay? There might be children tuning in.

actor212 June 20, 2012 at 10:26 am

Wow. You're kind of a sad old troll. I mean, pathetic. Not particularly clever and really really boring.

I crap bigger turds than you after breakfast.

BoatOfVelociraptors June 20, 2012 at 1:01 am

What's the obsession with having "legislation" rammed down our throats?

sullivanst June 20, 2012 at 9:25 am

I believe a fair few Polish Jews fought with less effin' big, but still big enough, guns bolted on to some balsa wood with an engine at the front and wings on the side, too.

Doesn't look like they had anywhere as cool names as Monty's crew, though.

NY9 Solyndra June 20, 2012 at 9:27 am

What are you talking about? We progressives know that all progress comes from the federal government! The more laws, the better! If a session of Congress passes a lot of laws, that means they are mas macho.

Truantly_Joe June 20, 2012 at 10:25 am

Ah. Well, that seems tough, but fair. I certainly can't fault our illustrious editrix for such a system as that.

(Please don't ban me!)

not that Radio June 20, 2012 at 10:31 am

Talkin' outta turn? That's a paddlin'.

NY9 Solyndra July 6, 2012 at 12:18 pm

OMG, posters on this forum lack creativity and wit.

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