MAUI WOWIE  9:45 am June 19, 2012

Here Is A Picture Of Barack Obama’s High School Friends Being Total Drug Addicts

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Look at these fucking stonersCan you find Jeff Spicoli in this picture? Have they already smoked their marijuana, or are they preparing to smoke their marijuana? Did they smoke two joints before they smoked two joints? Will they smoke two INTERCEPTED!

In the meantime, aw man, doesn’t this take you back? All that’s missing is someone’s mom to drive them to the skate park in their Ocean Pacific (OP) shorts. And what are they getting ready to eat? That cake we like. This is just a perfect picture. That is all. [WashEx]

 
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{ 115 comments }

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 9:46 am

I've always wanted to walk up to Obama and say "Dude! You holding?"

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 10:07 am

Holding? William Holden? Did Holden Caufield come to the party?

thatsitfortheother1 June 19, 2012 at 10:14 am

Now Erik's the Holder.

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Did Gandalf bring his Bag of Holding?

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:16 am

Call feel? Man, is she a hooker?

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 10:54 am

Holding? No, not nearly as scary as Whispering Death

Estproph June 19, 2012 at 9:49 am

Hey! Whose lawn are those damn kids on?!

Chill_Bill June 19, 2012 at 9:49 am

The Audacity of Dope.

MumbletyRadio June 19, 2012 at 10:18 am

I just broke into a soft-shoe upon reading that, with a tip of the hat in your direction (all virtual, of course, of course…)

Chill_Bill June 19, 2012 at 10:28 am

Thanks, Radio! (takes a bow)

noodlesalad June 19, 2012 at 9:50 am

Clearly, these people are all too skinny to be Americans.

In all seriousness, I want to go to there. Too fun.

TheJasonAlexanderFanClub June 19, 2012 at 11:08 am

They're not American, they're Hawaiian. Kamehameha will rise again!

Hera Sent Me June 19, 2012 at 9:50 am

This is a photo of the meeting where it was decided Barack would be president one day.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 9:56 am

Is that grinning idiot Saul Alinsky???

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 9:56 am

Always wondered what they grew there at the Bohemian Grove.

BerkeleyBear June 19, 2012 at 11:06 am

Fat, saggy naked guys mainly, if the stories are true.

Hera Sent Me June 19, 2012 at 9:59 am

An excerpt from the minutes follows:

Commie Wastoid 1: You know what would be totally awesome? If one of us became president one day.

Commie Wastoid 2: Man, that would be primo bitchin'. Which one of us should it be?

Commie Wastoid 3: Don't look at me man. I plan to destroy my mind with LSD in a couple months.

Commie Wastoid 1: Yeah, well I'll be living on a commune in California.

Commie Wastoid 2: Hey, Barry is passed out. I nominate him.

Commie Wastoid 4: I, like, second that.

Commie Wastoid 1: All in favor, make a peace sign.

Commie Wastoid 5: Looks like it's totally unanimous.

Commie Wastoid 1: Like, wake up Barry and tell him.

Commie Wastoid 3: Wake up dude, you're like totally going to be president.

Barry: Of Pakistan?

Commie Wastoid 3: No dude, of America.

Barry: Almost as good.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:05 am

Aw, man! Dammit!

sullivanst June 19, 2012 at 10:46 am

You gotta be quick around these parts, doncha?

Chill_Bill June 19, 2012 at 10:03 am

That was back in kindergarten. In this picture, he's picking his cabinet members.

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:47 am

Well, I give all of them a lot of credit for realizing he could no longer be a Supreme Court Justice.

Baconzgood June 19, 2012 at 9:50 am

"total absorption"? We knew it as submarining or fish bowling.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:08 am

Carful of pot smoke? We called it "any winter evening"

Baconzgood June 19, 2012 at 10:13 am

You gotta crack those windows. If you get pulled over…well you get the picture.

Trust me. Lessons learned hardest are learned best.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:25 am

Oh, you were moving?

Well, I mean so were we but it was more flying than driving…

Chow Yun Flat June 19, 2012 at 9:52 am

Hey man, Barack's not here.

ElPinche June 19, 2012 at 10:47 am

Probably because he's too busy bonin'

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 9:52 am

Man we had shitty cameras back then.

1stNewtontheMoon June 19, 2012 at 10:30 am

that picture was taken a week ago with instagram

skaboy.net June 19, 2012 at 1:03 pm

I was thinking the same thing! It's absolutely amazing we go from no camera phones, to crappy ones, all the way to 10 MP camera phones just to make our pictures look like 1955 all over again. Why!!!

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 9:53 am

If that picture was taken in Hawaii, you know they had some good shit.

harriedhubby June 19, 2012 at 9:53 am

Oh SWEET MERCIFUL JESUS! They have CAKE! How did this get past BREITBART??? CAKE! They want to rub CAKE all over the constitution! CAKE! Everyone lock and load and be on the lookout for CAKE!

thatsitfortheother1 June 19, 2012 at 9:57 am

I'll bet if you look beneath the icing, it's yellow cake.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 9:59 am

Someone! Leave the cake out in the rain!

freddymcmurray June 19, 2012 at 10:26 am

or red

bonghitforjesus June 19, 2012 at 2:15 pm

The cake is a lie!

DahBoner June 19, 2012 at 3:28 pm

We need more movies about cake.

harriedhubby June 19, 2012 at 9:55 am

When you look at the dufus who posted this original item on the Washington Examiner, you come away with the thought that the brother needs to either hit a spliff, take a dump, get laid, or all three.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 9:58 am

I was just thinking he looks upset he missed the party.

"Chooming? Aw, man, that's another thing Mom did that I haven't! My mom is cooler than I'll ever be!"

Chow Yun Flat June 19, 2012 at 9:56 am

A choice between a member of a multi-ethnic bunch of laid back tokers or an uptiight leader of a crew that assaults gay fellow students.

Seems pretty clear.

Chow Yun Flat June 19, 2012 at 9:57 am

Simultaneously. He could ask Senator Vitter for a few phone numbers.

Baconzgood June 19, 2012 at 9:59 am

Those are some tight ass short shorts.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:02 am

When I was a lad, they weren't shorts if your nutsack wasn't poking out the bottom

Baconzgood June 19, 2012 at 10:04 am

I was a lad then too. This is why you never see me in shorts unless swimming or biking.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:06 am

I miss the tight ass short shorts. On chicks. Hot pants. Yum.

thatsitfortheother1 June 19, 2012 at 10:10 am

On a bike…

BRB

ph7 June 19, 2012 at 10:25 am

Those were the days of miracles and wonders.

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:48 am

Sizzlers!

[Not the restaurants you dumb ass kidz!]

SoBeach June 19, 2012 at 10:27 am

Still remember my OP corduroy surfer shorts. With the 28 inch waist. Looooooong time ago, man.

And everyone had that same Scott Baio, parted in the middle hair…

scvirginia June 19, 2012 at 10:47 am

You sure Scott Baio isn't in that photo?

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:50 am

SoBeach:

Slax with a 28" waist, bell bottoms, and no outside seams.

My mother-in-law had a 70's party and I told one of the guys there "cool pants!"

My mother-in-law said "Those used to be yours."

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 10:00 am

So, he's the "tokin' black" of the Choom Gang?

freddymcmurray June 19, 2012 at 10:29 am

you magnificent bastard.genius.

TheJasonAlexanderFanClub June 19, 2012 at 11:09 am

Awwww shucky ducky.

Beowoof June 19, 2012 at 10:00 am

I don't know about you, but I would not want the guy who never tried weed in high school or college to be my president. At least be cool enough to have given something different a try.

FlownOver June 19, 2012 at 10:00 am

Also pictured (2nd from left): future candidate of the Slightly Silly Party Kevin Phillips-Bong.

Schmannnity June 19, 2012 at 10:00 am

Those Kenyans have awfully light complexions.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:01 am

"So dude, man, you know what would be really cool, man? *sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssmf* I was thinking, man, it would be really cool if Barack here was, like, you know, our first negro President man, cuz then the nation would finally be, like, equal and racism wouldn't exist anymore and we'd all join hands and live in peace and harmony, man.

DOOD! Why you intercept?????"

UW8316154 June 19, 2012 at 11:24 am

*ssssssssssssssssssssssssf* "…..you fucker, Barack!!………..anyway…….couldn't you just see our man here, ya know, gettin inta Harvard or sumpin like that?"

Come here a minute June 19, 2012 at 10:05 am

Hawaii? Those thugs look one hundred percent like Kenyans.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:07 am

Say, what "high" school is that?

Maman June 19, 2012 at 10:07 am

Looks like a picture of dudes from my high school yearbook, The Towpath. except nobody every baked us cakes.

chascates June 19, 2012 at 10:11 am

Because they were too baked themselves!

scvirginia June 19, 2012 at 10:48 am

Because y'all were all tow-heads?

Maman June 19, 2012 at 1:08 pm

No, because we live along the Erie Canal and barges moved down the canal because they were dragged by mules that walked along a towpath.

Chet Kincaid June 19, 2012 at 1:18 pm

Uh, when were you in high school??

Generation[redacted] June 19, 2012 at 10:09 am

When I look at that picture, why do I hear the first few bars of Aerosmith's Sweet Emotion?

chascates June 19, 2012 at 10:10 am

"Dave's not here!"

ph7 June 19, 2012 at 10:19 am

I'm glad I get this joke.

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:52 am

JINX!

Sorry – Chow Yun Flat beat ya to it. Please see above.

chascates June 19, 2012 at 12:28 pm

See, I searched for 'Dave' to see if anyone had posted that and figured I was safe.
MUST. READ. COMMENTS. BEFORE. STICKING. FOOT. IN. MOUTH.

BaldarTFlagass June 19, 2012 at 10:10 am

Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Michelle Obama, man, and everyday Barack would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man, when he come in the door, man, she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man.

1stNewtontheMoon June 19, 2012 at 10:33 am

Mitt's going to cut the shit out of Mitch Kramer's hair. Bank on it.

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:53 am

BTF:

I think Michelle is the girlfriend who didn't put up with that shit and got Barry back to Barack.

BerkeleyBear June 19, 2012 at 11:13 am

Nah, he started using Barack at Occidental, because chicks digged it. He got clean towards the end of his time there and then was basically a library haunting nerd through law school, when he met Michelle on a summer job. No way choom club Barry scores a fine, upstanding woman like Michelle – that took Barack.

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 11:21 am

BB:

I think we're on the same page. BTF's vision was a nice one – but reality distorts it a bit.

doloras June 19, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Did you ever look at the back of a dollar bill? Man, there's some freaky shit goin' on there.

Sparky McGruff June 19, 2012 at 10:15 am

I can't wait to go to the Examiner website to read the racist comments.

ElPinche June 19, 2012 at 11:02 am

I left a poop for them. They need a little bit of weed in their sad lives.

UW8316154 June 19, 2012 at 11:32 am

Here's an eloquent example from Harold Herrington:

President ["POT HEAD"] Now Ain't You So Proud,You Voted For This Fraud,Birth Certificate,False Draft Form,Stolen Social Security Number,No Clooege Degrees To Show,Law License Revolked For Fraud Application.Can't Get Security Clearance Yet You Gave Him The Keys To Our Country.What A Bunch Of No Lives You Are,Leftist Loons!

heh. I knew that clooege degree I earned wasn't worth shit in Amercia.

Sparky McGruff June 19, 2012 at 12:42 pm

You have to admit, capitalizing every word is a nice touch. I think it really "classes up the joint"…

But then again, I have too many clooege degrees.

ph7 June 19, 2012 at 10:16 am

Life is unfair. My stoner friends looked just like that in 1979, but none of us became President of the United States. Maybe the Paraquat stunted us.

not that Radio June 19, 2012 at 10:17 am

You know what I like to munch when I'm all baked? Fido.

Oblios_Cap June 19, 2012 at 10:18 am

Don't bogart that joint, my friend. Pass it over to me, again.

I feel like a number.

1stNewtontheMoon June 19, 2012 at 10:28 am

Mitt's boner for cutting the hair of unwilling participants just ripped the seam in his magic underwear. Get Mittens his Clippers!!1!!

Halloween Jack June 19, 2012 at 10:29 am

That one dude is totally flashing a Vulcan gang sign. Darrel Issa needs to hold another hearing!

Guppy June 19, 2012 at 11:31 am

There are only so many days in a week for Issa to hold his lectures hearings!

MosesInvests June 19, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Trek yo'self before you wreck yo'self.

elburritodeluxe June 19, 2012 at 10:34 am

This is the shittiest Islamo-Fascist Madrassa EVER! Where are your long beards? Where are your AK-47s?

ElPinche June 19, 2012 at 10:49 am

Mitt has a similar picture of his days at University of Moroni, except it looks like a funeral with gold bullion and butlers.

Antispandex June 19, 2012 at 10:54 am

Must be stoned if they're going to eat all of that cake. What is the current statute of limitations on being hign, and eating cake?

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 10:56 am

The theme is already up here, in more sublte tones, but I really would like to compare that photo to the one of (r)Money holding a kid down and cutting his hair.

Chet Kincaid June 19, 2012 at 12:36 pm

There's a photo of that?

Tundra Grifter June 19, 2012 at 1:03 pm

CK:

Unfortunately, I very much doubt there is.

But we can always hope…

DahBoner June 19, 2012 at 11:03 am

Where's the hot straight-haired chicks from The 70's Show????

ElPinche June 19, 2012 at 11:03 am

Mittens: "Let them eat!"
Obama's notorious choom gang: "OK!! "

SayItWithWookies June 19, 2012 at 11:07 am

Remember those days in high school when it was late spring and the world was lush, warm and beautiful and you used to hang around with your friends thinking about the future and wonder if you'd be famous or significant or accomplish something great? That takes me back. And it's nice to know that future happens to somebody, even if it's not quite the way he imagined it.

I'll bet Mitt's got memories like that too — rolling down the assembly line, the QA testing, being taken out of the bubble wrap for the first time…

savethispatient June 19, 2012 at 12:03 pm

OMG, we need to scour YouTube for the "MittBott 3000 unboxing video". It'll be the dullest video known to man.

bonghitforjesus June 19, 2012 at 2:19 pm

The video of Mitt learning to sing "Daisy" is super cute tho.

BTWBFDIMHO June 19, 2012 at 11:08 am

Guess why nobody's holding dollar bills?

DemonicRage June 19, 2012 at 11:11 am

So which of these guys would the Prep School Bully target for pinning down and obligatory hair cutting?

Chet Kincaid June 19, 2012 at 12:37 pm

Do you like being called "Katie" or something?

notreelyhelping June 19, 2012 at 11:16 am

I love the idea of a sleepy-eyed, smirking Obama nodding his head to "Slow Ride." Just because. They need to work that into the campaign bio film at the convention. "Take it easy…"

mavenmaven June 19, 2012 at 11:36 am

oh, they are obviously all Asians, as they are flashing the V for the camera like Japanese girls, except for the white dude doing the vulcan salute…

DahBoner June 19, 2012 at 3:24 pm

V for Vagina?

niblick77 June 19, 2012 at 12:22 pm

The cake reads: Welcome to America Barry!

Chet Kincaid June 19, 2012 at 12:40 pm

These guys prolly never did anything really cool like kidnapping a girl and force-converting her to Aqua Buddha.

commiebro June 19, 2012 at 3:16 pm

Vans. OP shorts, Hang Ten shirts. A little early for Vuarnets, that was mid '80's. Skateboard: Tracker trucks, Kryptonite wheels, Logan EarthSki deck. Or Bones/GullWings/Stacey Peralta. Bike? Mongoose or FMF. Stickers on notebook: KLOS, KMET (that's the L.A. equivalent, I dunno the radio stations in Oahu at that time). Yes, I had that haircut- Editrix, it's up to you to find a photo, I'm sure Mom has something.

DahBoner June 19, 2012 at 3:23 pm

What I want to see is when Barack's father guest stars on How I Met Your Food Stamp Mother, Dude

Tommy1733 June 19, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Wild times in Singapore.

kingofmeh June 19, 2012 at 4:07 pm

needs more maniacal grin and fake pistol under chin.

TribecaMike June 19, 2012 at 5:35 pm

As always, The Washington Examiner is dazed and confused.

M. Bouffant June 19, 2012 at 6:22 pm

do0D.

ttommyunger June 20, 2012 at 7:32 am

Well that does it, I'm voting for Romney.

actor212 June 19, 2012 at 10:24 am

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