Here is excitable-looking Arizona nitwit congressional candidate “Ron Gould” runnin’ around with his flat-top ‘do and his murder weapons and his pack o’ hounds before he takes a quick break from huntin’ Mexicans in the desert to pump buckshot into “government-run health care,” meaning the federal health care reform law requiring citizens to purchase private insurance, from private companies. PRINCIPLES. For his next ad, “Ron Gould” will pump buckshot into leeching Arizona seniors crying for their government-run Medicare, probably.
For more stupid, we go to the Huffington Post, which has this ridiculous detail about Ron Gould’s idiot son and this terrible ad:
The ad features men fondling guns and includes appearances from Gould’s sons, Ron Jr. and Robert Gould. But Robert does not carry a weapon in the ad, and for good reason: In January, he was sentenced to 90 days in jail after a felony theft conviction, which makes it illegal for him to possess firearms.
…
Patrick Gerhart, Gould’s campaign manager, said that the campaign made sure to keep Gould’s felonious son away from the weapons. “His son Robert was not around any of those shots. His son Ronnie was in those shots,” Gerhart noted accurately.
Well! Good to know that some thought went into the ad, at least. [YouTube/HuffPo]
{ 175 comments }
Happiness is a warm gun.
you beat me to it……….
I find burning sandlewood a little severe, but it tempers nicely with thyme.
Damn these cheap foreign knockoffs! All this time, i'd been singing happiness is a warm gnu. How embarrassing.
Good thing it wasn't a Chinese knockoff, or you'd sing "Happiness is a warm Nuge"
In the mouth.
He's quite skillful at pulling on it, isn't he?
"For more stupid, we go to the Huffington Post"
Truer words were never spoken.
Good place to go if you experience a twinge of inadequacy and want the cure.
Also quack medical advice!
It's funny because it's true AND it's Dr Nick Riviera! Hi Dr Nick!
From what I've heard, you also go there for the sideboobs.
But not the comedy. No no. For that, it's our good old fashioned Amercian brand of comedy, from Teh Wonket
yeah, fuckin sideboobs. there can never be too much sideboob.
Remember when the brand new Huffington Post was a welcome breath of anti-Drudge fresh air?
Maybe he can get Jesse Kelly to guest-star in his next ad. I mean, he ain't doin' nothin' nowadays anyway. They can go out and machine-gun some saguaros.
I want to see more of the grizzled old prospector at 9 seconds in. Especially if he jumps up and does a jig yelling, "GOOOOLD! GOOOOOOOOOOOLD!"
The new sheriff's a ni(CLANG)!
Isn't that old-timer the same guy that's in the Wonkette stock AZ photo, with the huge cactus for cock and balls?
Cactus to you.
Regular Saturday night to Ann Coulter.
"GOOOOLD! GOOOOOOOOOOOLD!"
You'd probably have better luck if you watched some futbol on Telemundo.
My first guess is that he is/was (same thing) a Marine.
My second guess was that he thinks of himself as a Marine.
It's the latter.
Cue "there is NO SUCH THING as a 'former' Marine" rant…
Sometimes Fidelis.
There is no such thing as a "former" Marine Poseur!!!
Semper Faux
I'm so
stealingborrowing that.haha
As a Mareen Kernel that served with John Wayne and Audie Murphiy on the Apache Trail, I think I am best qualified, no…the only qualified Man on this whole World Wide Web Internet site to tell you who is and who isn't a Mareen!
Sic Semper Fifi!
OO-RAH!
So his son Robert is on the government dole, then? Getting all the free govt food and free govt health care in the joint. That's Socialism, my friends.
I wonder if he was a guest of Sheriff Joe.
Hey Ron, if you "pull" repeatedly, it's called "fapping."
Until you finally "shoot your wad".
Is it just me, or did Wonkette remove our faces? Maybe Gould blew them off with his gunz??
Maybe our faces were fucked off by drunk Libertarians.
COTD
It's not just you.
I Have No Mouth, And I Must Snark
Excellent.
As Jon Stewart would say, "It's like an Eyes Wide Shut orgy in here."
Like I told you
What I said
Steal Your Face
Right off your head.
(Sigh) and me with this ice-cream cone on my forehead.
"Conservative Republican Ron Gould"
You'd think "Conservative" were some sort of earned title to listen to them, like Dr. or Rev. or something similar.
It's shorter than Fuxstick, Second Class.
Probably more like a professional license/certification, like a Professional Engineer (PE) or Professional Geologist (PG). That reminds me, I've got to renew my PG next month…
Listen, to Conservatives, rétard is a step up in rank.
Dr. of Moraniscism
As opposed to all those liberal Republicans.
So, if elected, Mr. Gould will surely "pump himself full of buckshot" when he accepts that sweet, sweet federal health care supplied to all Congresscritters.
Oh yeah, and, socializim!!!111!!!!
Irony is indeed a fly in one's Chardonnay.
"If I go to Congress, this is what I'm gonna do to Chardonnay…pull!!"
But given yesterday's happiness in Gabby Giffords' former aide Ron Barber keeping her seat in Congress (by 7 freakin' points oh yeah!), perhaps the Arizonians are showing some sense about gunz.
Naaah, the Idgit Brigade is still very much alive and well.
The gun nuts passed out after celebrating Indiana's victory against public servants and didn't make it to the polls.
I'm sure Barber will find himself in their
gunsightssurveyors' marks come November. And he'll whup 'em again, because now the district is more heavily Democratic.He doesn't mention how Jesus wrote the Second Amendment after a night of drinking in Yuma. Doesn't he love America?!?
He's Mormon?
Jesus had to. He once shot a man in Flagstaff, just to bring him back to life.
I thought at first that the logo on the guy's shirt was bragging that he has an Arizona Commercial Driver's License, but no.
From the website:
"If you want to protect your Right to Keep and Bear Arms in Arizona, then you want to join the Arizona Citizens Defense League (AzCDL)!"
Oh, one of those. Color me surprised.
They need guns to protect themselves from unarmed USDA and Census workers. Citizens' Defense!
"Ron, Ron Jr., and Robert."
God how I hate unclever alliteration.
In Arizona it's illiteration.
I was thinking more "Hi, I'm Larry; this is my brother Darryl, and this is my other brother Darryl"
He's like the bastard child of Ron Burgundy and the bad guy from Avatar.
I have yet to understand why embarrassment and shame don't stop men like this from waving around guns as props; it does nothing but advertise and amplify their inadequacy for the whole world to see.
It does? {Puts .45 back in drawer.}
I'm sure he drives a hugely jacked up pickup as well.
With huge steel balls hanging off the trailer hitch…
Men like this seem to sincerely believe that you won't NOTICE that they obviously have micro-penises.
These endless fucking idjits are destroying my comfort zone.
Guns don't kill people. People with moustaches kill people.
I bet he didn't even consider recycling that copy of the ACA law.
Lost: one kitten avatar. If found, please call me.
It's the face-eating Florida zombies! They've over-run intensedebate!!
HA! That explains how I still have mine. No one messes with Rambo Kitteh!
Looks to me like those of us logged in thru Wordpress are the only ones who retain our Purity of Essence, as it were.
Hmmm.
Chet, I am askert. Hold me, please.
Don't call yourself a "skirt," that's sexist!
To be on the safe side, Barb, you should probably take it off.
You can borrow mine…
Arizona; the dry Florida.
It's not the Derp, it's the Stupidity.
It's a dry Hate.
No gators. Lots of 'baters.
Small eyes close together = mean.
And usually, IQ < three digits, too.
And ignorant. (See: Scott Walker).
My mom always said small eyes and ears = wife beater
Small eyes close together = Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, like Joe Scarborough
Good fucking God, those beady eyes and muffin hair can make me lunge for the remote.
ts;dw (too stupid didn't watch)
Rep. Ron Gould (R-Desert Shithole Methlab)
Gould? Sound Jewish. Maybe he ought to change it to Goulet.
Too Frenchy.
So maybe Poupon?
Gullet.
I've got a Jewish acquaintance out in PHX who shares that last name, you can be sure I am going to be giving him some shit on this.
We don't need the ACA, well, not until we get sick.
Oh, Arizona, why do you try so hard to make Florida look good?
OT
Is it just a glitch in my computer or is there a movement afoot to remove avatars?
No, mine and a lot of other people's have disappeared. Perhaps they have been Raptured!
Aw, fuck! So truly, I am Simply Left Behind….
Now you can go into everyone's house and find their stash and drink up all their booze.
Oh wait! Bonus! I'll say hi to Satan for you all…
Much like third grade…
Yours is the only one I can see..
The avatars go in, the avatars go out…who can explain it.
They were gone before, but I see them now, I do I do.
He can understand that "we can't afford" healthcare but never gets to the point of asking why. Oooh, so close…
Guns are so "Vietnam Era." I want a guy with drones. Drones are cool.
I'm sure he drones, too.
Fezzes are cool!
These people are so far gone, and have made campaign spots like these so often, that this is really unremarkable.
It is extremely remarkable, that this has become unremarable, though.
Hell, instead of an election just meet at high noon on Main Street ready to slap leather!
You mean vote for Congress at that Leather Man Convention thing? I used to work next to a hotel in Chicago when the leather boys came to town every year. That was some people-watching!
Really? I wouldn't think that afficionados of versatile multi-tools would be all that interesting to watch.
(No, it's just impossible to even talk about the hardware company without a wave of double entendres…oh, I did it again…)
I think Jan Brewer might not enjoy that much
Talk about distressed leather.
That reminds me, Germany is playing Netherlands tonight.
I play with my Netherlands almost every night.
8:45 at my place, watch about the first five minutes?
I'm pretty sure the last five are the most interesting part.
How about a compromise? We'll build you a fence fence, but it's got to have four sides, not just one.
Bonus, Arizona's a nice square state! We won't need a whole lot of fancy posts or scienceticians to work out how to put it in place. Couple good ol' boys and a pick up truck.
Mine field. Don't forget the mine field. And the razor wire.
The Feds will pay. Oh wait, silly me…. of course I mean we'll pay, since Arizona's another net recipient of my money.
Arizona … still trying to make NC, SC, Mississippi and Alabama not look so stoopid.
"We want govuhment out of our lives so elect me to govuhment."
Wow…hook this guy up with the woman that voted against her child's happiness and we'll have one of them there super couples. Instead of Brangelina we'll have Gouldalooper.
And that's how Palins are made.
Why have I got this sudden urge to pry things from his cold dead hands?
These people are the reason we can't have a nice government in this country. Somehow, someway, we used to keep this level of moron away from actually having a voice in things; what the fuck happened?
what the fuck happened?
Nothing. We have always been a nation of yahoos and morons. Technology has just made the idiocy more accessible, particularly to other idiots.
They got that one line in the Bible a little wrong. "And the stupid shall inherit the earth."
Its been on the decline since Gutenberg. Zuckerberg made it worse.
Am reading Twilight of the Elites for clues.
So far it's only made me consider buying another keg of Alaska APA to get me through the week. Also going out to the rifle range for more practice.
I'm actually a pretty decent skeet shooter. When we run out of clay birds, we fling copies of the Ryan budget.
The ad features men fondling guns
Gay porn, in other words. Smart move.
The dude is sporting a totally glorious molester-stache, ain't he?
Yeah, and when he mentions himself as a "straight-shooter" my gaydar is going off the chart.
After he shoots Obama-care, I bet he's gonna shoot global warming and sea-level rising. Then he can shoot the deficit to death, and then he can shoot the shit out of the weak economy. There ain't no problems that can't be dealt with by shootin' them, yeee-hawwww.
Guy's opposed to government run health care, eh? Since the new health-care law doesn't provide a government-run healthcare system, nor do Medicare and Medicaid, I guess Patriot Gould must be talking about the system of VA hospitals. I'm not sure he's going to get a lot of support for taking away a system that veterans depend on, but you have to respect that he's a man of principle.
Perhaps it's the lack of humanity I mean humidity that causes all of this weirdness in Arizona.
The heat evaporates the brain until it becomes a dried-up husk.
Breaking news: Those who's avatar still shows are the finalists in the Win a Date With the Editrix Contest.
This has caused me to lose face.
I see what you did there, invisible stranger.
Mine disappeared but I made it come back, so am I stll in the runnning? And what are the terms and conditions of the date?
How about those who just restored their avatar by finally getting around to setting up a Gravatar?
I have a gun made entirely out of butter.
I think that's a gub not gun
Cheez-Whiz, Winch, now it's a Woody!
win-win……?
I don't have anything to say, I'm just testing my avatar.
AAAAARGH! Where is my avatar?????
It's a conspiracy, I tells ya!
Arizona. The Dry Florida.
PRINGLES!
CELEBRITY NIP SLIPS (PHOTOS)
Sideboobs or GTFO.
Here's an idea. Nut jobs seem to regularly threaten to take all their guns and their canned goods and run off into the Mexican desert or to an enclave in Idaho. How can we give them all a good enough scare so that they do it and leave the rest of us to live in peace?
Threaten their supply of "Bud Light"
Once you pop, you can't stop!!
Felony theft?
SHARIA LAW, CUT OFF HIS DICK (IF ANY)!!!
Vote for me, or I'll come to your house and shoot you!
Too bad they didn't put thought enough into the ad to avoid saying "Washington needs a straight shooter" right after retelling the Lie of the Year, 2010.
My avatar (and everyone's) shows up on the computer but not on my I-Phone.
Some avatars are better than other avatars. Smirk.
Didn't this guy just lose to Leslie Knope?
OH NO, NOBAMA'S THUGS TOOK AWAY HIS KID'S GUNZ FOR NO REESON!!!1111!!
Why do these neo-Nazi's think they also need to imitate Hitler with a nit wit mustache?
I am ashamed to be so shallow as to judge just on appearances, but this turd looks so stupid I simply refuse to allow his words to enter my thought processes. You, see; I live in Georgia so my life is pretty much consumed by suppressing the urge to go Postal.
OK, screw that Idea–I can see a couple of gravatars without the li'l "W" logo…
While you are giving advice, you might want to give Chet a nudge…
I haz a wordpress, but because of complicated reasons, it's not directly linked to the IntenseDebate I use,
I think that's just it: "Gravatars" work also? But just uploading a pic to Intense Debate got ate up?
Comments on this entry are closed.