We all vaguely know that Mitt Romney was at one time one of those Marxist militants who sought to force healthcare coverage on human individuals with a government requirement that most individuals buy private health insurance available through a competitive marketplace, i.e. COMMUNISM, and that this long-ago love affair with tyranny is something that Mitt Romney’s team spent $100,000 to hide when he left office as Massachusetts governor. But true love cannot be kept hidden forever blah blah blah and now the Wall Street Journal has published a lengthy series of fugitive emails that managed to escape his team’s delete key, and they are just one long testament to Mitt Romney’s devout affection for the individual mandate. Let’s have a peek!
Most of them are too lengthy to block quote so here is the first short one we saw. This is Mitt Romney, who is staying in, not having any fun, because he is lovesick, for individual mandates:
So, I stayed home to write an op ed. No New Hampshire, Lousy weather anyway. Take a look at what I’ve drafted. I’m not sure it’s cerebral enough for the WSJ. Maybe somewhere. Maybe a re-work. Of course, as always, praise is welcome. Best, Mitt
That’s cute, “praise is welcome.” Look who has feelings to hurt now all of a sudden! He is so in love with the individual mandate. Here is the first draft to come out of that lonely weekend, where he even tries his hand at some emotion with a fancy word like “inhumane” used in a negative context, like it is somehow unacceptable when people suffer from lack of healthcare. Liberal pansy-ass!
Totally smitten. And guess what other terrible liberal crimes against humanity Mitt Romney used to love to commit! Here is a fun thing we spotted in the Boston Globe:
A Lowell-based solar technology company that received $1.5 million in state loans when Mitt Romney was governor has filed for bankruptcy, opening the presumptive Republican presidential nominee to charges of hypocrisy.
Konarka Technologies disclosed Friday that it had filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy protection and would fire its 80-member staff and liquidate its assets.
On the other side of the equation, maybe this is why Mitt Romney has mysteriously been going around trying to take credit for Barack Obama’s successes. He has understandable difficulty telling Obama’s record apart from his own. [WSJ]
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Romney likes to man date? Do Miss Lindsey and Marcus know?
Know? What do you think they did this weekend?
But his men are all dated.
Those "mom jeans" are such a turn off.
He wears Jord-ass
Yes, the off switch to the RomneyBot 2000 is in the pocket.
"Is that an off switch in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
–Miss Lindsey
But it's pointed up!
Reversed polarity?
They are One Million Moms Jeans (not available at JC Penney).
Chill_Bill, thank you for an excellent response to my post. You are very talented and special.
Thanks, Barb! It means a lot coming from you.
Btw, when are you going on vacation again? That's the only time my p-score goes up!
I am going on vacation on the 17th.
Sorry that I seem to be holding your p-score back.
Making these jeans is the afternoon craft activity at Vacation Bible School!
I was thinking a sweatshop in the Marianas, because Mitt likes to "shop Republican".
There are no jeans in the world that could make Mittens a turn on. J Brand, True Religion…no chance…
When Barry wears them, they're sexy. Mitt however, looks like a creepy Ken doll eunuch.
You know Mitt has no recollection of this, as he wiped his own hard drive.
Did he walk through a magnetic metal detector?
No, he rubbed his hard drive against it, then wiped off with a screen cleaner.
I'd like to rub my hard drive against a metal detector, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.
In fairness, he might have suffered an EMP when he came into close contact with Callista during the debates. Them feedback loops can be tricky.
So if Mitt and Calista had a baby, would it look more like R2D2 or C3PO?
You know, that was a truly unpleasant mental image. Congratulations!
You are welcome.
Twiki, from Buck Rogers (Google it, if you aren't old enough)
Ooh yeah, good one.
mmm, Erin Gray…
"You got your USB plug in my ethernet socket!"
"You got your ethernet socket on my USB plug!"
Using a Huggies hypoallergenic baby wipe likely.
"Insist that everyone purchase"?
Oh, I see! He's being like a Republican boss, so he can have his little "insurance policy"…
He's not so much a ward healer as he is a warding heel.
Individual mandate: the love that dares not speak its name.
I again raise my voice in praise of the architect of our Nations wonderful new healthcare plan. Thank you Governor Romney for putting politics aside and seeing to the needs of your State
"Of course, as always, praise is welcome"
Praise only; no criticism is welcomed. What an entitled douchebag (as always).
"Cerebral enough for the WSJ." Ha, ha! (Wipes tears. Sighs.) The old Mitt was such a jokester.
Damn, you beat me to it by two posts…
Also: LMFAO!
That is not a real photo, is it? It looks like his torso is trying to flee the lower half of his body.
Seems right–I'd flee the lower half of his body. Mrs. Romney flees on horseback.
Ann Romney has fleas?
Hey, I'm just asking the questions. It's up to the viewers to decide what vermin she's infected with.
Mittbot parts are interchangeable. He's just like a potato head in every sense of the word.
That is exactly what it looks like, too, like he's not quite bolted together right.
I think it's a 'shop.
I’m not sure it’s cerebral enough for the WSJ.
Wait–he thinks the Wall Street Journal is "cerebral"?!?
I don't know whether to LMFAO or cringe in terror…
Well since Rupert took over they should have changed the name to The Tea Bag Journal. And we know nothing cerebral is going on there anymore.
I don't think "cerebral" means what he thinks it means.
Konarka Technologies is totally different from Solyndra because, uh, Romney and uh, Freedom??
This is really going to play out interesting as Konarka has stated it was seeking and may still be seeking Chinese financing. So one of the few companies in the US which has developed an alternative to the traditional photo voltaic cell is primed to sell its patents to the country which has crashed the US solar energy industry. What are the odds the bankruptcy judge was appointed by Romney/Bush?
Are they not chosen from the pool of each particular district’s judges or is that a coincidence, I don’t remember.
Obvs, because Romney is white, and Bazza isn't.
Every time Mitt flip-flops, it makes Baby Joseph Smith cry.
That photo: Is Romney attempting to reproduce the Heisman? If so, #FAIL.
And let's never forget that the individual mandate was a Heritage Foundation-backed alternative to Bill Clinton's proposals for a federally-run centralized health care system.
This was of course the fabled age when the Democrats actually took a leftist position now and then, and when the Republicans' guiding philosophy wasn't pure Social Darwinism but without the belief in evolution.
Of course, Dems still took the bold stand of folding like a brand new poker player the minute a Republican said "Boo." And putting forth a variety of conservative legislation that would later lead our country to financial ruin. It's a long a proud tradition.
Camel toe!!
Even my sisters cockatoo doesn't find the editoral pages WSJ cerebral.
Remember, Mittens is used to talking to sycophants. Their responses are limited to words of one syllable, usually along the lines of "Yes." Anything polysllabic is, by comparison, cerebral.
We call it the Personal Responsibility Principle: no more free ride.
Can't wait to see this principle applied to the oil companies, the defense contractors, Wall Street bankers, and those people known as corporations…
Personal responsibility so loved by republicans, except when proposed by the Blah Guy.
If a blah says it, it's liberal fascism. Totally different.
He's got fucking camel-toe! I've heard of man-boobs (ok, more than heard) but I didn't know men can sport camel-toe. This is strange.
Mormon says what?
If being for the individual mandate isn't proof of Romney's liberal programming, the fact that he tried to reason with libertarians definitely ices it.
You're fired! Of course, as always, praise is welcome.
Enjoy your haircut! Of course, as always, praise is welcome.
God Bless Amercia! Of course, as always, praise is welcome.
CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEX TAPE
KBJ you sure you don't want to rethink that statement? It's an eye catcher and all, but a Mitten butt-orama?
Think we want bunz, then is Newell available for live blogging of the Annual Solstice Nude Bicycle Parade on the 16th?
Rule # 6 – no banana seats.
EWWWWWWW. I don't know why but I can't stop gazing at Mitts batch.
Want me to tell youse? It's because it's Mitt's top half photoshopped onto a woman's bottom half (I'm pretty sure), and the, um, packaging looks all wrong. Your brain keeps telling you that the pitcher's not right.
Even with this information, I'm still disturbed.
(Hugs the Baconz) Let's see if that helps.
You think it's because RMONEY is such a bot, that it's hard to *like* him?
Please! Let us speak no more of Mitt Romney's genitals!
*Wipes back of hand across forehead and faints
That’s the magic of magic underwear.
Mittens wears mom jeans!
If you think these are something, you should see the interpretive dance Romney used to perform about the Death Panels.
"So, I stayed home to write an op ed. No New Hampshire, Lousy weather anyway."
Ain't no sunshine when the mandate's gone / Only darkness every day
"Oh come on, that was when I was running Windows Vista! I've had a complete rebuild since then."
Just wait until he gets upgraded to Windows 8. His hair app is supposed to be even glossier.
Mitt's other nickname is "High-Pockets".
True story.
Ok, ok, I get it. Once again Romoney is a douche hypocrite about the mandate.
But I want to know what the hell was going on with the winter weekend in New Hampshire that he would need to write about it with that suspiciously veiled reference ! Hmmm.
Um, MIttens? The correct way to do the Hokey-Pokey is left foot in, right foot out. What you're doing looks like a cross between Bob Fosse jazz hands and an epileptic seizure.
The internet/email/Twitter/Facebook kinda make it hard to etch-a-sketch the hypocrisy away.
And my mom called. She wants her damn jeans back.
That's one dandy karaoke machine ya got there Mitt.
So I imagine we'll hear soon why Konarka=good and Solyndra=bad. I suppose Solyndra must sound more like Kwanzaa than Konarka does, if ya know what I mean.
Well, at least now we know why Mitt wants to take a lot of credit for things. No one's giving him any.
The 'shop above is one of the creatures Harryhausen designed for his sequel to the original "Clash Of The Titans." This horrifying half-Titan, half-Gorgon was supposed to drop its culottes and drown Greek warriors in afterbirth.
A Ken Doll is packing more meat than Mitt "Pandering is HARD" Romboto.
He even copies Obama's mom jeans.
My pappy always told me, never trust a man who looks like he's playing ping pong when he's not playing ping pong.
No basket in jeans that snug = really a robot. Give me Martin O'Malley in sleeveless black with a guitar<3
OMG, this man IS my former boss, but with more hair.
Somewhere, a 40-ish house-frump has lowered her trousers to pee, and in horror discovered Mitten's Mormon union suit, frank and beans.
Gah! I have to lay off the martinis.
The english language doesn't even need the word "hypocrite" anymore – just replace it everywhere with "romney"
The insurance stuff is too confusing, with math and all, so let's just lie about it, then go with Obama is going to take your guns.
"Opening Romney" to charges of hypocrisy is like opening Hitler to charges of being prejudiced.
No snark here. My son is alive because of MassHealth (originally RomneyCare). He was born at 23 weeks 6 days development, which is nearly 4 months early. In his first month of life he had a re-opening of the patent ductus which is supposed to close at birth, causing a potentially fatal heart murmur, a perforated intestine, a brain bleed, and emphysema. Had it not been for MassHealth, there is no way we could have kept him at the hospital for the care which saved him. So you understand I get really pissed off when I hear Romney babble about how ObamaCare (which is for all intents and purposes the same thing) is such a terrible thing.
I'm glad your little guy is ok.
yeah and what's so sad is he's forced to run away from a really good thing he did b/c the republican party has moved vaguely right of the inquisition.
At this rate, by the end of this campaign season, Mitt will not only be in favor of gay marriage, but will claim he was for it the whole time.
Obammer's opposition research team's biggest problem: WHERE TO START.
It's like Finnegans Wake. You can open to any page and start reading.
It's like Finnegans Wake. You can open to any page and start reading, and eventually return to where you began.
fer sure.
Why is Mitt wearing Mom jeans?
Being retired, that's all he can afford?
I want mittens to take off those mom jeans, and put on a pink slip.
MITTENS TOTES DIGZ "The Personal Responsibility Principle," CUZ to you people working for a living and taking responsibility for you and the well-good of others, You're still middle class, dammit. Damn you, middle class. And you students? Damn you, too— and also. And Also. When you make a load of sweet, sweet cash— you can be like Romney sayin' "I remember being human. I remember that. It was a thing. Human. Now it just tastes good." And that is all Mittens will have to say at his blasted acceptance speech.
What I really want to know is: Why is Mitt Romney wearing mom jeans?
Well…I just went off on a winger on the Daily Beast for the same blindspot stupidity…this is why I come to wonkette when I'm online. You guys are like the condom wrapped 'round the penis before the penis enters Sarah Palin (try to get that image out of your head for a while). It's good to see fellow lefties as sick-minded as I am…may you all never change
By the way…I just read a news story that's claiming somebody hacked RMoney…which one you did it and did you make him wear Rudy 911iani's dress and put that animal trump bolts to the top of his head out his misery? Hacking Romney has to be like the most boring minigame ever…
Wow, it's like Abelard and Heloise communicated via email. And were really boring.
I meant that as a compliment, of course. I need a vacay myself, also.
I can see why you'd faint, sweetie.
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