SHUCKING AND JIBING  9:45 am June 4, 2012

Black Congresswoman Is Black

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Also? She's black.

Ghost Andrew Breitbart simply does not care for this “screeching screaming song and dance” performed by Democratic (did we not already say she was black?) Congresswoman Gwen Moore. But why? What could they possibly have against this nice lady’s funny Def Jam Poetry about Scott Walker’s sleazy voter nullification and everything else he has ever done?

Not sure! First commenter, can you let us in on what the Breitards are thinking?

Black. Black black black black black black black. Also? She is black.

[Breitbart]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 149 comments }

chascates June 4, 2012 at 9:48 am

She should have stuck to shooting hoops instead.

boobookitteh June 4, 2012 at 10:02 am

Midnight basketball libel.

bagofmice June 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

Shakespeare libel!

chascates June 4, 2012 at 9:49 am

And I believe the correct term is 'shuck and jive'!

JustPixelz June 4, 2012 at 9:53 am

Not that there's anything wrong with that … oh wait, actually there is.

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 9:54 am

Depending upon the cut of her jib.

BornInATrailer June 4, 2012 at 9:57 am

"Excuse me, miss. I speak jive."

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 9:59 am

The only "shucking" Breitbart ever did was a half pound of oysters, in a desperate attempt to conceive a child.

iburl June 4, 2012 at 12:46 pm

He tried to build a child out of a pile of raw oysters? Dude was messed up.

ShreditorsDesk June 4, 2012 at 10:01 am

I get the jive. CWCAL cain't dance and cain't jump!

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:09 pm

*puts Louis Jourdan on CD player*

Lionel[redacted]Esq June 4, 2012 at 12:31 pm

Perhaps she was discussing sailing? Or perhaps the commenter is so white, he can only think in terms of sailing.

George Skullfry June 4, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Except among the blah yachting crowd.

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 9:52 am

Too soon. We are all still swooning over Breitbart's portrait in the article just below.

Serolf_Divad June 4, 2012 at 10:14 am

Agreed.If this lady had simply had the foresight to dress up as a Teutonic Knight and addressed her concerns to the Party Congress in Nuremeberg, it would have been 100% kosher cool.

CthuNHu June 4, 2012 at 9:53 am

If Jesus wanted black people to vote he'd have written it into the Constitution, like he did state-sanctioned piracy.

freakishlywrong June 4, 2012 at 9:53 am

The cross-eyed turd has got to go. I only hope they can get rid of him. Fuck you, Brietbart.

didgen June 4, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Hey, you know some of us cross eyed turds are not so bad. Not so much turds either..or named Scott, or have a criminal defense fund, but I'd like one of those, but cross eyed, definitely cross eyed..

Vecchiojohn June 4, 2012 at 9:54 am

Thinking?

Gratuitous World June 4, 2012 at 9:54 am

Let The Eagle Soar Remix or GTFO.

FlyOverGirl June 4, 2012 at 9:55 am

Where's the watermelon and fried chicken?

Callyson June 4, 2012 at 11:45 am

More iced tea, MF'er!

FlyOverGirl June 4, 2012 at 12:05 pm

Sweet tea, y'all.

badgitator June 4, 2012 at 9:56 am

Excuse me, stewardess – I speak shuck & jibe.

mrpuma2u June 4, 2012 at 11:01 am

Chump don't want no help, chump don't get dick help. Jive ass Scott Walker got no brains no how.

walterhwhite June 4, 2012 at 1:43 pm

jibe? It's "jive." Get those racist cliche's right!

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2012 at 9:14 pm

Sadly, the Milwaukee native who made that film is now a Teatard.

A mighty fall from being in my Lutheran stepfather's Scout Troop at one of the North Shore synagogues. From ecumenical to yech.

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 9:56 am

I'm confused. Codes like "states rights" and "native-born" are OK because…why, again?

chascates June 4, 2012 at 10:06 am

Because they're not 'urban'.

Serolf_Divad June 4, 2012 at 10:16 am

Because they're about uniting people, not dividing them like Democrats do whenever they complain about laws that make it harder for minorities to vote.

valthemus June 4, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Because that's how we always talk just before a civil war.

new_pic_for_NEWTer June 4, 2012 at 9:56 am

Needs moar Jacskon 5, and less Saul Williams…

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 9:58 am

Michael Alinsky and his brothers Tito, Jermaine, Randy, Jackie and LaToya.

MosesInvests June 4, 2012 at 10:23 am

Janet Alinsky libel!1!

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 10:54 am

Free the Expo 67!

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 9:57 am

Clearly, Breitbart has no Baptists on their staff.

Hm. Or they do but none of them will own up to it.

BerkeleyBear June 4, 2012 at 11:28 am

Oh, they have Baptists. Southern Baptists (the actual denomination, not the general popularity of Baptist tradition in the South). Think John Birchers but with a drawl.

Negropolis June 4, 2012 at 10:57 pm

Which is funny, 'cause Scott Walker is a Baptist, but not "that" type.

JustPixelz June 4, 2012 at 9:58 am

This reminds me of when Mitt Commie sang "God Bless America". He really let his hair down* on the second verse!!1!
__________________________
* according to microscopic photo analysis

SoBeach June 4, 2012 at 9:58 am

"…street corner shuck and jibe."

I prefer to DUCK when I jibe.

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 10:00 am

Duck and jab, Rocky! Duck and jab!

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 10:32 am

ISWYDT

Tundra Grifter June 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

Talk about your "boom times!"

weejee June 4, 2012 at 9:58 am

Here's hoping Walker becomes a political ghostie.

Thurman Munster IV June 4, 2012 at 11:05 am

As a resident of the blueberry in the tomato soup (Madison), I must warn you to not get you hopes up.

weejee June 4, 2012 at 11:21 am

Well if not the recall how about asking Walker to join you on a field trip to Horicon Marsh? The crappie might be biting and I hear cider blocks with a goober wrapped in chains is the proper tackle.

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:14 pm

I like the general idea, but Walker's already crappie enough.

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:13 pm

"blueberry in the tomato soup (Madison)"

It took me a second to get it, but that's good.
Chapel Hill, NC used to call itself "a small pat of butter in a sea of grits", which meant pretty much the same thing. I thought it was conceited until I got around to visiting other parts of the state.

fuflans June 4, 2012 at 3:33 pm

you don't think so huh? i thought i heard something this AM that suggested barrett had some momentum?

NorthStarSpanx June 4, 2012 at 10:00 am

Commenters should be relieved that not all blah's live up to the stereotype that they can sing (and dance.) Then maybe they aren't so poorly reflected in the size of their Whi'man's genitals.

WunkRocker June 4, 2012 at 10:05 am

You got Voter problems / I feel bad for ya son/ I got 2 Koch Bros / an this bitch aint one.

Estproph June 4, 2012 at 10:06 am

OhmiGod! SHE RHYMED! Those people ALWAYS rhyme!

They dance too! It must be because they rhyme!

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 10:52 am

You know who else always rhymed…

bagofmice June 4, 2012 at 11:25 am

Vanilla Ice?

anniegetyerfun June 4, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Mutter Gans?

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Adam Yauch?

(He stole, also.)

Negropolis June 4, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Don King?

Fare la Volpe June 4, 2012 at 1:56 pm

And their bones are curved. That's why they can't swim.

Chow Yun Flat June 4, 2012 at 10:08 am

It is a shame and a sham that CWCAL is allowed near a computer with an internet connection.

Mittens Howell, III June 4, 2012 at 10:08 am

She should talk to her constituents through Fox News, like God intended.

deanbooth June 4, 2012 at 10:09 am

[no snark] A tip o' the hat to Rev. Wright for pointing out that there are many odd dialects across the US, but shuck and jive is singled out for ridicule.

Dashboard Buddha June 4, 2012 at 10:29 am

Maybe on a broad level…but when I want to indicate stupidity, I, with deepest apologies to my smart friends south of the Mason Dixon, will imitate a southern accent.

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 10:45 am

I had a Cajun ask me a question at Heathrow once. Couldn't understand a word he was murdering. Musta been a long trip in London for him.

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 10:53 am

It's OK, he was likely as unable to understand the locals as they him.

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 10:56 am

Two great nations separated by a common language

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:18 pm

I had a co-worker from somewhere in rural Louisiana, don't know if he was a Cajun, exactly — and as I've probably mentioned a few times, I'm a Jersey Girl. We really did have a hard time following each other. Although our conversations were technically in English, if they'd ever filmed them, they would have needed to subtitle both of us.

deanbooth June 4, 2012 at 10:50 am

Yup, the hillbilly dialect gets similar derision.

Here is part of what Wright said (it loses something in the transcription):

In the 1961, it's been all over the Internet now, John Kennedy could stand at the inauguration in January and say, "ask not what your country can do for you, it's rather what you can do for your country." How do you spell is? Nobody ever said to John Kennedy that's not English "is". Only to a black child would they say you speak bad English. Kennedy got killed. Johnson stepped up to the podium and love feel, we just left love feel. And Johnson, said my fellow Americans. How do you spell fellow? How do you spell American? Nobody says to Johnson you speak bad English.

Ed Kennedy, today, those of you in the Congress, you know Kilpatrick. You know, Ed Kennedy today cannot pronounce cluster consonants. Very few people from Boston can. They pronounce park like it's p-o-c-k. Where did you "pock" the car? They pronounce f-o-r-t like it's f-o-u-g-h-t. We fought a good battle. And nobody says to a Kennedy you speak bad English.
http://www.libertylounge.net/forums/30022-reveren

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 10:57 am

Say it! Say "Chowdah! "

bagofmice June 4, 2012 at 11:27 am

Showdère

CrunchyKnee June 4, 2012 at 10:10 am

Viking ghost Breitbart nods and smiles from Jeebus' right hand side.

prommie June 4, 2012 at 10:11 am

And then she went and voted 27 times as a dead white grandfather!

And damn that dead breitbart's arms are so fucking short!

chascates June 4, 2012 at 10:14 am

"His arms too short to box with God."

HogeyeGrex June 4, 2012 at 10:28 am

Thalidomitebart

arduinohacker June 4, 2012 at 10:58 am

And going by the size of his head, his torso is only about 1.6 head-heights high. That's gotta crowd his internal organs something fierce.

kissawookiee June 4, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Only having room in there for a sigmoid colon explains so much.

randcoolcatdaddy June 4, 2012 at 10:12 am

Hmph … all these damn kids with their hippity hoppity music. Get off my lawn!

FlyOverGirl June 4, 2012 at 10:12 am

I thought it was a good idea to to Google "Shuck and Jive" or "watermelon racist joke" to see if it spurred any pithy comments in my brain.

So … looking for that brings up lovely sites like Niggerbama. The interwebs hurts my brain.

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 10:33 am

Is that site about a president or a state?

FlyOverGirl June 4, 2012 at 10:51 am

President. Although there may be a small town in South Alabama.

boobookitteh June 4, 2012 at 10:52 am

It's where Rick Perry hunts.

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 10:57 am

Must be furners. There's no more racism in 'Murka, Bamz' election proves it.

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 11:00 am

Well, actually, it proves that only blacks are racist, because over 90% voted for Obama.

(As opposed to the 85% of blacks who usually vote for the Democratic presidential candidate)

new_pic_for_NEWTer June 4, 2012 at 10:14 am

Oh yes one more thing – kindly FUCK the autoplay BudLightMojito advert…

Come here a minute June 4, 2012 at 10:15 am

Ghost Andrew Breitbart DEMANDS a glass of M-Fing iced tea! ("Is it just me, or does it seem like these flames are never going to end?")

Dashboard Buddha June 4, 2012 at 10:24 am

does it seem like these flames are never going to end?

Sometime between now and the heat death of the universe, the offspring of these fools will look at their parents and think, "that's fucked up" and adjust their beliefs incrementally. Then, the children of those people will do the same, and so on and so on.

I hope.

BaldarTFlagass June 4, 2012 at 10:15 am

Its just your jibe talkin'
Youre telling me lies, yeah
Jibe talkin'
You wear a disguise
Jibe talkin'
So misunderstood, yeah
Jibe talkin'
You really no good
.
Which Bee Gee is still alive?

prommie June 4, 2012 at 10:25 am

Are you trying to start a joke, that will get the whole world laughing? careful, you might not see they are laughing at thee.

thatsitfortheother1 June 4, 2012 at 10:48 am

Particularly after lights all went out in Massachusetts. Or was it Wisconsin?

Geminisunmars June 4, 2012 at 11:10 am
Pop_Socket June 4, 2012 at 10:16 am

What's the latest on Obama? Is he still black too? Perhaps he needs to be vetted better.

smitallica June 4, 2012 at 10:17 am

Who the black does this black think she black? Jesus Black alblacky!

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Black down, Honblack. Your black's black is all that blacks.

Chow Yun Flat June 4, 2012 at 10:19 am

Why doesn't she just speak like normal people?

prommie June 4, 2012 at 10:21 am

And this still is not my beautiful Wonkette, all looking like the fucking Playboy's Party Jokes page from 1974 with that creature with the fucking ears there and font, lord protect us from the terrors of that font.

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 10:34 am

Fappable Editrix silhouette?

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 10:51 am

I for one welcome our new feminofeline overlord. Uh. Overlady?

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Overkitteh.

SorosBot June 4, 2012 at 10:25 am

I missed the part that makes that hard to watch; that was very easy to watch, and I like that congresswoman.

metamarcisf June 4, 2012 at 10:25 am

Take it from me. Since Andy succumbed to the Big C (Cocaine), his website has degenerated into a poor man's World Net Daily. Here's hoping that father-in-law Orson Bean has what it takes to return the Big sites to relevance in time for November's trainwreck.

Estproph June 4, 2012 at 10:35 am

Degenerated? That would be a step up!

HogeyeGrex June 4, 2012 at 10:25 am

Now, if she'd have been screaming "BEHAVE YOURSELVES!!!" at the top of her lungs? That would have been alright.

DaRooster June 4, 2012 at 10:29 am

CWCAL needs a sentence/paragraph writing class and so on and so forth and also too…

weejee June 4, 2012 at 10:30 am

BTW, pollz in Cheesheadistan show Barrett closing on the walking ghost Scott Walker. One problem with a lot of pollz these days are they are way heavy to landlines. Even oldes like Mrs. weejee and I have tossed our home landline in favor of mobiles. And guess what? Libtards do much better in cell phone pollz that landline pollz. So huzzah, Walker is a loozer by 800%, the end.

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 10:59 am

Your words, FSM's ears.

fartknocker June 4, 2012 at 11:28 am

My family is coming together tomorrow night to watch the WI recall votes but more importantly, we want to see how your citizens vote in the recall of 4 State senators. Your state's political landscape changed in 2010 because of the Tea Party schmucks. As we understand WI, a recall of just one of the 4 republicans will shift your state house back to the Democrats.

Ed Schultz revealed that the Koch rings are spending $25 for every dollar we liberals contribute. We're hoping your electorate has sliced away all the bullshit and bravado and understands that Scott Walker is the new template for the GOP attacking and dismantling union rights for government workers. Everyone reading this should know I am retired union government worker, so I get like 5 big gold stars of being a liberal douchebag in the world of GOP because I didn't earn "it" like Jim Inhofe, Rick Perry or Newt Gingrich.

weejee June 4, 2012 at 11:44 am

I'm a Wisconsin alum, sorta – kindergarten through 11th grade, and Ma's ashes are in Sister Bay, about 75 miles out the thumb from Green Bay, but voting would be a reach from Seattle.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

DRUDGE SIRENS

Den of leftniquity Wonkette schemes to vote illegally in Wisconsin with Seattle mailing addresses

"Revenge for stealing the Pilots", rejoin Emerald City communists

/DRUDGE SIRENS

Dashboard Buddha June 4, 2012 at 10:31 am

They might have listened…at least for a little while, if she had her skin bleached like Michael Jackson. But then they would complain about her not being true to her race.

Have I mentioned that I hate these fuckers?

mrbubb June 4, 2012 at 10:31 am

To be fair, there were a lot of criticisms of that Indiana state senator who lost his cookies the other day. I don't see a lot of difference between this liberal losing her shit and that conservative losing his shit. Black or white, she should chill.

BigSkullF*ckingDog June 4, 2012 at 10:36 am

Dear Editrix,

In polite society one does not say "that" word. The polite word is blah.

Yours Truly,
BigSkullF*ckingDog

weejee June 4, 2012 at 10:43 am

Jibing?

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 10:38 am

I think this fellow usually spells "democratic representative" with two "g's"

starfanglednut June 4, 2012 at 10:39 am

Where's her hoodie?

Baconzgood June 4, 2012 at 10:40 am

You can't diagram that sentence

weejee June 4, 2012 at 10:46 am

It's too Venngali?

BigSkullF*ckingDog June 4, 2012 at 11:25 am

You can, but the diagram ends up looking like a fat doofus in a suit of armor.

horsedreamer_1 June 4, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Subject goes in, predicate comes… Uh.. Erm… Wazat?

schvitzatura June 4, 2012 at 10:44 am

I tried to put on my shoes they were too tight they would not fit…then I went to use the convenience and almost froze my toes … here's how it goes…

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8!

738838 June 4, 2012 at 10:46 am

This woman has totally GOT it. Obama/Moore 2012

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 10:47 am

Dear first commenter at Ghost of Breitfart…

Before you take offense on the audience's part, you may wish to consider their reaction.

BarackMyWorld June 4, 2012 at 10:49 am
comrad_darkness June 4, 2012 at 11:02 am

"Shuck and Jibe" I did that in a sailboat once. Almost tipped it over.

Tundra Grifter June 4, 2012 at 11:27 am

Next time, don't be afraid to let out the sheet.

TootsStansbury June 4, 2012 at 11:36 am

Inattentive helm: "Shucks…JIBE!!!!"
Rest of crew: "word that rhymes with shuck!"

Sassomatic June 4, 2012 at 11:02 am

Ooh, chile', dat missu Walker sho' is wrong fo dat.

Thurman Munster IV June 4, 2012 at 11:02 am

I don't like blah mondays.

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 11:02 am

Editrix, is it just me or is this fucking video on autoplay?

freakishlywrong June 4, 2012 at 11:13 am

Yes.

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 11:15 am

Not just on autoplay, but above the fold, so it autoplays on the home page too.

anniegetyerfun June 4, 2012 at 1:12 pm

It DOES seem to be the case. Good thing I don't have a working audio system!

Chick-Fil-Atheistâ„¢ June 4, 2012 at 11:07 am

They were probably just trying to figure out what "predilection" means.

actor212 June 4, 2012 at 11:20 am

Ah gots et!

It's like a purdection, but es a purdection bout th' lection! ACORN done fixed it arreddy!

sullivanst June 4, 2012 at 11:22 am

Needz moar spit.

Chow Yun Flat June 4, 2012 at 11:12 am

Run a tape of some drawling redneck from East Texas and you wouldn't be able to tell what language he is speaking.

occams8ball June 4, 2012 at 11:17 am

Mistress, if you are so into brightbart, why don't you but that one too?

CapnRadio June 4, 2012 at 11:23 am

Excuse the stylized rant, but it's the end of the term, and I've grading on the brain.

CWCAL–Your post is direct and fairly well structured (I believe that you mean "jive," but that's neither here nor there, really). What concerns me are several aspects in your premise, namely:

1) The slam poetry that Congresswoman Gwen Moore is performing is mislabeled as "shuck and ji[v]e." I'll just chalk this one up to racism, if you don't mind.

2) The implication that her performance is somehow a lesser performance of literacy. People aren't always being intentionally racist when they assume the form of discourse that is and has been dominant in our country is the "proper" one; I'm always seeing students adopt that attitude because they haven't been encouraged to see differently. So I'm encouraging you to do so now. There is nothing inherently better about a discourse that has been set by affluent white males. Let that roll around in your skull for a while.

3) The suggestion that Congresswoman Moore's constituents would feel patronized by her speech. Did you watch the video? Did you hear the reactions and audience participation? I'm afraid I would suggest closer reading next time. Additionally, I posit that if you break down the language in that performance and compare it to your average Mitt Romney speech to the Seniors for Vanilla Pudding Society or whatever, you'll find that Moore uses more sophisticated language and the poem's scheme encourages a deeper negotiation with the structure of the text. But hey, she's up there waving and moving her head in a manner threatening to the non-initiates in the discourse (like you? I'm not so sure–the parallel structure of "It is a shame, and a sham" gives you hope), so it must not make sense to anyone, right?

Final Grade: F

I'm afraid you'll have to take this course over until you actually learn something.

Doktor StrangeZoom June 4, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Course evaluation: Instructor never respects students with different political opinions and only gives As to people who agree with his far-left views. Doesn't explain grading criterions. Video of lectures to be posted to Project Veritas soon. Also never gave clear explanations of assignments and hates America. Would NOT recommend this class

CapnRadio June 4, 2012 at 1:53 pm

What, no chili pepper‽

TootsStansbury June 4, 2012 at 11:29 am

What the hell is wrong with that commenter? The Congresslady is wonderful.

MissTaken June 4, 2012 at 11:31 am

It's a shame, and a sham, when a commenter has to address the Breitfarts he (probably not she, let's be real) was self-appointed to blabber to like they are worthy of far more than being commented at like they are capable of understanding something but trailer parking lot shock n'yall.

Terry June 4, 2012 at 11:35 am

Shuck and jibe? Jeeze louise, if you're going to be a racist at least get your terminology right.

niblick77 June 4, 2012 at 11:37 am

Breitbart's biggest complaint is……well, his biggest complaint right now is that he is dead!

Tundra Grifter June 4, 2012 at 11:40 am

However, had this been a white guy in Illinois yelling and throwing around his papers, that would have been cool.
http://wonkette.com/473911/dont-worry-thrashing-l

Ryy June 4, 2012 at 12:39 pm

The following three comments appear as response to the first comment:

"And ugly. I don't like to comment on the face people were born with but this person and Sheila Jackson Lee both look like gorillas. They really do."

"Hell…you'd think the idiot people watching her would be embarrassed!!!!!!"

"Amos and Andy had class."

Fun yes, but the winner is: "fat ,black,and stupid is no way to get through life gwen". Tell ME about it!

anniegetyerfun June 4, 2012 at 1:15 pm

OMG. I really feel like the internet should administer deadly shocks when people type stuff like this.

ttommyunger June 4, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Puppies bark but the train just keeps rolling on down the tracks.

a_pink_poodle June 4, 2012 at 4:25 pm

She's black, y'all
She's black, y'all
She's blackity black and she's black y'all

Negropolis June 4, 2012 at 10:55 pm

I need a big smile, today, and I thank Gwen for this one.

tessiee June 4, 2012 at 12:20 pm

"Ai em NOT! eh clumsy, Clouseau-esque waitaire!"

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