Dignified constituent-servicer Ken Bennett, Arizona’s Secretary of State, went through all sorts of unnecessary hoops to “verify” President Obama’s birth certificate for a ten-millionth time after Sheriff Joe and Joseph Farah and TWELVE HUNDRED CONSTITUENTS demanded he do so. He takes the oath of office very seriously, folks. So seriously that he promised to run Mitt Romney’s birth certificate, which we saw this week and which is clearly bullshit because c’mon, just look at it, through the exact same verification process. But now he’s reneging on that pledge that because, uh, Sheriff Joe or some other idiot authority figure hasn’t pretended to raise any issues with Romney’s certificate yet. Why is Ken Bennett ignoring the calls of Arizonans Arizona-wide to verify Mitt Romney’s birth certificate? He must really hate his constituents.
We think Ken Bennett knows that Romney’s birth certificate is a fake — and again, it is, just look at it — and is doing the work of his party now. This is the most disgraceful thing in American politics since Elizabeth Warren went around saying she was 100% black Mexican:
PHOENIX – Secretary of State Ken Bennett will not verify the birth records of Republican presidential hopeful Mitt Romney, at least not now – and possibly not ever – despite an earlier public commitment to do so.
Bennett said Thursday that he has received requests from Arizona residents to perform the same kind of verification through Michigan about Romney’s birth certificate as he did through Hawaii for President Obama. And he acknowledged he had agreed to make such a check if he got a request.
But Bennett is now saying he needs something else: an allegation by an Arizona law enforcement agency that there is a question about the veracity of a candidate’s claimed birth certificate.
He said that was always a precondition of looking into Romney or anyone else. He just never disclosed it before.
Clearly this can’t stand. Just look at that Romney birth certificate, it’s bullshit. Look at it. Right? Here is the contact information for the Arizona Secretary of State. He needs to hear from the people about this. He is not taking his responsibilities seriously and should go back to Mexico.
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Romney is not as brown as Obama. ; )
Needs more tanning beds.
Shouldn't it read:
Mother's age:39
Mother's age:37
Mother's age:14
Mother's Age:16
………………………
Barb–Do you have a sicko twitter connection to the editors? How do you always manage to be the first commenter? Have you no life? If not, you can have some of mine, because it sucks right now.
But it's in English, not Romney's native Mexican.
I demand to see the Romneybot's long-form user's manual!
Have they finished translating it from it's original Chinese?
Actually, the original was written in Yoruba and translated into Japanese by a Polish scholar, who went on to make that brilliant Polish-Japanese science fiction film, Avalon. It was pirated by a Chinese firm which did a bootleg translation using a Thai highschooler.
It says VOID right on it. Nice try, Mitt.
Not only that, but the watermark is clearly a map of Africa and the Middle East.
But this was a totally legitimate investigation, not just pandering to the lunatic racist Republican base.
How dare you be racist against the racists!
Hating racist white folks is the real racism!
Why are the tolerant so intolerant against the already intolerant? Truly that is the real intolerance.
Hey wait- Romney's dad is from Mexico, and some wingnut told me that Michigan is the place with all the Muslims….
And the biggest city in Michigan has a French name, and Romney spent TIME IN FRANCE. WAKE UP SHEEPLE.
And those cheese eating surrender monkeys have the soshulis medicine. And Mitt rammed soshulis medicine down the throats of the unsuspecting libruls in Massachusetts. Stop drinking the koolaid and CONNECT THE FUCKING DOTS!!!!
Baaaa -aaaad.
You'd think this birther thing was politically motavated or something….
Why is Obama politicizing his birth certificate?
Where have you BEEN lately, baby? Nice to see ya. Hope life has been OK.
Aww, you are Prommie are so sweet to notice. Been out of work, and finding an appropraite position in my industry as proved daunting. But I've given up! Yay! Living on my unemployment and not ashamed of it, because why? Because I paid for it and by God it is my right to use it! So suck it, righttards!
Where was I? Oh yes, you guys are sweet, and thanks for the kind words. Life is a lot easier when you just let go, I am finding….
I knew you got laid off (hugs Tommmcattt), and was worrying aboutcha when I didn't see you around. I spent about a year looking without any success, and then decided I'd just go ahead and have major surgery and worry about things as and when they happen, and it's been better than I thought it could be. Good to see you back here, stay a while! Put up yer feetz and let yer inner snarkette run wild!
After viewing this, I can confidently state Romney's Birth Certificate saved the auto industry.
I think Romney's Birth Certificate would take a lot of credit for saving the auto industry.
Also too the Olympics, Salt Lake City, Utah, Mormonism, and The World. Not in that order.
Forgery, forgery, forgery!!1!
SkullfuckingSkullduggery even.The real one is here.
That delightfully impish humour now wingeth its way across the Twitterverse. Let's hope it gets TRACTION!
Romney has a certificate of Live Bait. He's a fucking worm.
Truer word was never spoke. Srsly. I just called him a fucking worm my own self.
"Certificate of Live Birth" is not a birth certificate, my friends. I've seen a lot of forged birth certificates in my day and that sure looks like one.
That font didn't even exist in 1947!!!
Plus they screwed up and made the issue date 2012.
Did they really have fonts back then at all?? Wasn't it all copied by monks?
Was the Ftate of Michigan even a ftate in 1947?
We fhall not fuffer fuch infinuations, you ftrumpet.
Pixels. Plus, also, Lenore? Who's named Lenore? Totally fake.
Beethoven's girl friend?
The rare and radiant maiden whom the angels named Lenore
Nameless here for evermore
You beat me to it, swine.
Nice work!
Poe's dead lover?
Hitler?
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa! Din't AI trademark dat?
A nympho that lives in TX that used to "date" a friend of mine. Back then, maybe 12 – 15 yrs ago she was pretty hot.
I hate to do this, but it actually looks like an amateur slap-up job. At least POTUS' COLB looked like a COLB.
'live birth' IS a little too much.
That "birth certificate" has fonts and kerning and shit. No way it's real.
The pixels! My God! the PIXELS!
"My God…it's full of Pixels!"
Daisy, daisy, give me your a n s w e r d o
I'm …. half …. Craaa….zeeeee…
all…. for…..the ….l o v e
o f
yyy oooo uuuuuu……
Wait – of course it's a fraud – it has "VOID" stamped all over it.
If you're familiar with the codes, it would be easy to figure out what fab plant most of his chipset came out of. His enclosure is trickier, but there's got to be a serial number stamped on the chassis somewhere.
Yeah, the question is "Where?" Nobody wants to find out.
I call "not it" on the chassis inspection. Because…ewww…
See? NOBODY wants to check ol' Chuckles' chassis.
The calendar says that his Fabrication Date was on a Saturday. At least, he isn't one of those Monday – Friday Androids. Those things break and go haywire all the time.
I dunno, CRE, he's lookin' awfully Monday – Fridayish to me.
He's sure acting that way, MB. Those assembly techs must have gone on a genuine bender that Friday. Bastards.
(Pays off last assembly tech) Wut? Oh, this guy's just leaving, don't mind him.
Wut's that you say?
These goobers have argued that since Obama's father was not born in America he is not a 'natural born' citizen. Romney's father was born in Mexico, in a slutty cult compound. Therefore . . .
Your logic is 2/5ths weak.
I can't wait to hear the loud yowls of wingnut outrage.
But the birther thing isn't racist. Nope. Hell no.
Word.
IBM has yet to release the original, long-form certificate.
I'd be more interested in seeing the warranty.
Mitt came with a Warranty Card, not a birth certificate.
Against defects in manufacture only, not performance or capacity to perform as advertised.
/ too much fine print heads for the Visine.
Mitt's a lemon.
But where's his warranty information?!
It wasn't even issued until January 18, 2012!1! Certificate of Live Birth my honkey white ass. Every good Real American knows only a Long Form Birf Certificate is legitimate!! Get The Donald™® on the phone ASAP!
And we need an affidavit signed by all the doctors that participated in his birth!!! No it doesn't matter that they're likely all dead by now!
Did Romney use this to forge his birth certificate too, also.
Does that signature at the bottom say Hewlett-Packard?!
Certified by Carly Fiorina herself.
Whoops, send it back for QA inspection. No wonder the damn thing's always breaking down.
I dunno, but the almost-invisible watermark says "Adobe".
That's not a *water*mark, Biely.
Mannish Water?
Mannish sheygetz.
HP? Just like their printers, that would explain the shitty quality and high operating costs. Printer ink, speaking fees, same diff.
Their ink is priced just right, for the 1%.
Priced like other staples of the 1% (no pun intended), from what I've heard.
More like this staple of the 1%.
His mama's name was Lenore Lafount? Sounz suspiciously French to me. Maybe that Mormon mission he did in France was really a homecoming?
It says "VOID VOID VOID" down both sides, for Pete's sake.
If Romney's team can't fake votes any better than they fake birth certificates, Democrats will win big in November.
Hey, dumb ass question here – but if his father was born in Mexico how did HE run for president back in 1968????????????????
That's just you and the media distracting from the real problem. Obama is a black man in the White House for fuck's sake!
Anyone can RUN for President, doesn't mean you can actually BE President.
Actually, no snark, during the NH primary that year some fliers turned up insinuating that ol' George Romney was in fact ineligible to run because he was born in Mexico. Romney's opponent being Nixon, it would be no surprise to find out they came from his camp, though I don't think that was ever proven.
Romney Sr. argued that he was a natural born U.S. citizen, even if he was born in Mexico, because his parents were citizens. Kind of like how Obama would be a natural-born U.S. citizen anyways even if he had been born in Kenya, because mother was a U.S. citizen. I know, right?
Or how Obama's 2008 opponent was a natural born US citizen despite being born in Panama.
Fair point, but I always assumed the Naval base McCain was born on was considered U.S. territory, even if it was in another country.
That is actually the argument for Juan McCain. And I believe there is an act of congress that states as much.
Tricky Dick McCain's certificate (obtained just for the press) listed an on-base hospital not built until four years after he was born. But the natural born thing has never been tested in court. Who knows what it means.
LOOK AT IT, LOOK AT IT!!!!!!!!!! IT SAIS "VOID" RIGHT ON IT. WHERE THE FUCK IS VOID? AFRICA? UBEKI-BEKI-BEKI-STAN-STAN?
"Bennett is now saying he needs something else: an allegation by an Arizona law enforcement agency that there is a question about the veracity of a candidate’s claimed birth certificate."
I bet $10,000 there's no such requirement anywhere in Arizona's statues and regulations. Fucker is lying through his teeth, in public, to the public (i.e., he's an Arizona Republican.)
There was no such thing as a sans serif font in 1947. Its clearly a forgery. The clue to the mystery is the word 'Mexico', which is a reference to "Montezuma's Revenge", the code name for the project that developed Mittbot 1.0
Show us Trump's Long-Winded birth certificate again.
Trump wasn't so much born, as formed when a bunch of shit in a cesspool fermented.
Don't dispute it. instead, just remind Arizonians that they are about to vote for a Franco-Mexican Taxassachusetts Mormon Liberal.
But he ain't "that nigger".
Just sayin'……….
Glenn Copeland
Michigan Birth Defects Registry
Vital Records and Health Data Development Section
Michigan Department of Community Health
201 Townsend
Lansing MI, 48691
http://www.mdch.state.mi.us/pha/osr/index.asp?id=…
I'm willing to concede that the production model was probably turned loose in Michigan . . . but shouldn't we go with the beta release? I'm pretty sure that was in some foreign-to-teabaggers (i.e. brown people) country.
But Bennett is now saying he needs something else: an allegation by an Arizona law enforcement agency
Well we can see this will never happen because all the lunatic, conspiracy lovin law enforcement officials in Arizona are Republicans.
This seems to indicate he is human and not a unicorn, as Michigan ALLEGEDLY does not issue a certificate of live birth for a unicorn baby. BUT DO WE KNOW FOR CERTAIN? HAS THE STATE OF MICHIGAN CONFIRMED THIS?
He says he's not a unicorn, and I have no reason not to take him at his word.
So, Wikipedia, what fun facts do you have about Ken Bennett?
In 2008, Bennett was named Chief Executive Officer [CEO] of GeoBio Energy, a company attempting to develop and market alternative fuel from plant sources such as algae. Bennett served as CEO of his family fuel distribution business, Bennett's Oil Co., from 1985 to 2006.
In 1989, several underground petroleum storage tanks owned by Bennett's Oil Co. released petroleum into the environment. In the years following, Bennett's undertook various remedies to decontaminate the area, paid for by its insurance company. Bennett's insurer, Federated Mutual Insurance, submitted five separate applications to the state for periodic reimbursement of the cleanup costs. The first four were approved, but the last was denied under a recently enacted act limiting reimbursement to costs not covered by insurance. Bennett's appealed the denial in court, arguing that the law was intended only to prevent double recovery, not to limit the state to providing only secondary insurance. The court affirmed the state's interpretation of the law and denied reimbursement.
This later came to prominence when as a state senator (see below), Bennett co-sponsored a bill in 2004 which would provide reimbursement for oil company cleanup costs already covered under private insurance. Some accused Bennett of a conflict of interest, given that his own company would benefit from this change. The bill never made it out of committee and did not become law.
And, of course, he wants to run for governor in 2014…
CEO of GeoBio Energy, a company attempting to develop and market alternative fuel from plant sources such as algae.
Being a true Republican, I'm sure he didn't accept any of those liberal, wasteful and commie/socialist federal grants, subsidies, or tax breaks. Just good old-fashioned USA investment money from entrepreneurial, job-creatin' billionaires.
That's an obvious forgery, because everyone knows that Romney became operational on 12 January 1992, at the HAL Laboratories in Urbana, Illinois, as production number 3.
Actually, the system went on-line on August 4th, 1997. Romney began to learn, at a geometric rate. It became self-aware at 2:14 a.m. eastern time, August 29.
In a panic, they tried to pull the plug…
The Mittenator M-800?
I Have No Mouth And I Must Yawn
The Robots of Yawn
This looks photoshopped! I can tell from some of the pixels and from seeing quite a few photoshops in my time.
The same day in history, March 12, 1947: The Truman Doctrine was proclaimed to help stem the spread of
MormonismCommunism.Well, I can dream, can't I?
Here's my actual email to Bennet:
Or fuck, what about that Panamanian sensation, Juan McCain?
Uh, Build the Dang Fence? (and then fill it with water)
Won't work. Juan comes from a long line of Navy people. They'll make it across the water. +
If some small town Arizona police chief, with retirement in the bag perhaps, were to question the authenticity of Romney's birth certificate, my respect for the whole state would move up at least 20 points.
So, 20 points total?
Mine would go up 20 points to 5.
I reckon Pima Sheriff Dupnik might think about it.
Birth certificate, nothing. I want to see Mitt's DNA, as there are serious allegations as to whether he's even human.
Where is "Dr. Polarik" when you need him?
What the fuck…? His middle is really "Mitt"?!
He had it legally changed for the 2012 election as part of a sponsorship deal.
Which explains the forehead tattoo he's getting in October.
(Day before birthday)
Child: Dad, can I have ice cream on my birthday.
Father: Yeah, sure.
(Birthday day)
Child: Where is the ice cream?
Father: Washing my cars was always a precondition of my giving you ice cream, I just never disclosed it before.
Child: You're a Racist.
Obviously, Mitt is hiding something.
Mitt Romney is an anchor baby.
Screw these wingnuts. I remember when Hopey was inaugurated, 1.8 million people, overjoyed at the possibility of some sanity after 8 years of bullshit. And on that very day a cabal of hating, bitter righties met to destroy not only him, but us, and our peace of mind. A month later, the fucking "tea party" was ginned up from the slime of Mt. Doom. They've made that last 4 years nothing but miserable to anyone who dared support something other than an oligarchy.
In the future when the history books are written, I'll be interested in seeing just how the Santelli incident either actually inspired the oligarchs' master plan, just gave it a name, or if he was actually just carrying out their orders.
Can I have all three?
and now we get to go back to 8 more years of bullshit.
at least that's how i feel after hearing those job numbers and the romney team and the market's crashing and fucking bill clinton.
be careful what you wish for assholes.
Mr Bennett:
Giving you a swift kick in the nuts was always a precondition of looking into Romney or anyone else. We just never disclosed it before.
That is not a birth certificate. That is a certificate of live birth. I don't see any doctor's or hospital's name. Plus, the state file number is not the right sequence for 1947. (I just made up that last part, but I figured it was enough to pretend to state it authoritatively.)
Really, this is the kind of thing that Michigan will hand out to anyone if you just give them five bucks.
Additionally, I believe there are some Republicans in the Michigan state government, so basically, SOROS ACORN ALINSKY.
AND NO RAISED SEAL.
And VOIDVOIDVOID!
(maybe that's supposed to be DROID DROID DROID…)
Someone on Yahoo! was asking why Obama took so long to release his birf sertificat and wondered what he was hiding.
But let me put it this way: what if some lunatic- say, a dentist lawyer from Southern California or Miami who believes the Apollo missions were filmed in a studio on Mars- demanded that Mitt Romney release a super-sanctioned CT scan proving that he is actually a department store mannequin being piloted by a mouse.
Would YOU respond to that kind of lunacy? OF COURSE YOU WOULD WHAT ARE YOU A COMMUNIST ALALALALALALA
Personally, I think on everyone's birth certificate where it says "Birthplace" it should say "vagina" or "gaping c-section wound."
or hospital.
Contact the Arizona Secretary of State and remind him of his duty to investigate the underwear, magic or otherwise, of all the candidates.
Bennett is so dumb that when he runs for governor he'll e-mail himself demanding to see his own birth certificate, and then whine about it being a distracting non-issue.
I told them in 1912 there was insufficient intelligent life forms in that desert to make it a state. Still isn't.
Of course he does not need a fellow Mormon's birth certificate. He probably just assumed the certificate was on some gold plates that only Bishop Romney could translate from "reformed Egyptian" and that would be a lot of work.
I used my soopersekrit Arizona-based email address to send the following:
Pardon me for copying your excellent idea, though not word for word!
http://www.azsos.gov/info/contact_us.htm
i wish i was still finding this stuff funny.
Wayne County… why do I think of electric chairs?
It could totally happen
10000111100000110111011010010100000001010101010000000000.
This is just sad. I stopped believing in Mitt Romney when I was in second grade, when the Easter Bunny let me in on the joke.
Hey, anyone in the Baltimore – D.C. area: Severe weather, thunderstorms and Tornado warnings in the DC, the Baltimore area, the Westminster area and the entire Region.. Here's the Sterling VA Radar
Serious weather and nothing to take lightly. Careful out there and take cover when you have to!
What? Wonkette has a picture of my people at the top of this story. Just read "The Worse Hard Time" by Timothy Egan because my still-shell-shocked stepdaughter, who moved to OK a couple of years ago, had already read the thing and decided the two of us should take a vaca retracing the dust in the Panhandle.
BTW–Ken Burns has a new doc about the Dust Bowl coming to PBS. More great publicity for Oklahoma! FDR saved them. So they show their gratitude by being Teabaggers before it was cool.
Shouldn't he also demand that Romney release his patent registration?
Clearly the birth certificate is a fake. After all, it appears to be printed with a computer printer in a font that was not around in the 1940s.
Plus it says Mitt was born in Detroit, and yet he is not poor. black., and or an unemployed auto employee. Like that is possible.
Where's the vagina????
I contacted Mr Bennett and suggest you do likewise.
I am eagerly awaiting the verification of Willard Mitt Romney's birth certificate, as you promised, so things are even and you don't look to be a racist.I know, as you and Mr. Romney are both Mormons, that racism is in your recent past and something like only verifying the black guy's birth certificate could prove troubling to many Americans. Thanks
That's not really imissopus. That's a Poe.
I thought imissopus's Raven reference was very apPoepriate. Make that mistake? Nevermore!
(laughs hysterically, frightens cat)
How clever! Now, nothing can go wrong…go wrong…go wrong…
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