HOW MANY POPES IN THE PIT?  5:11 pm May 25, 2012

Very Sane Website Explains: English-Only Driving Tests Protect Against Bigotry, Racism, The Pope

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

All hail BeelzebubHey Americaphile, what’s new in Jersey? Anything interesting going on with respect to driving tests at whatever New Jersey calls the DMV? Could you please answer in the form of everything in bold and ALL CAPS?

Republican Sens. Gerald Cardinale of Cresskill and Michael Doherty of Warren/Hunterdon offered a bill to require both portions of the examinations for personal licenses – written test and skill test – to be administered only in English.

THIS MEASURE WILL MAKE ENGLISH AVAILABLE TO ALL AND BE A STRONG BULWARK AGAINST BIGOTRY AND RACISM!!!!

That is intriguing indeed! We did not understand the first word in your link back to your previous post about how “English-only” driving tests protect against bigotry and racism, so we will just have to take your word for it. Maybe because all the gross foreigners will be gone, so nobody can be racist against them? Yes, that makes the most sense by far. (At least more sense than Ireland and the Klan what?) But is there something crazier you would like to tell us, maybe what this English-only driving-test bill by these two American heroes has to do with Popery?

THIS MINISTRY SALUTES THESE TOW TWO HEROES FOR THEIR COURAGEOUS EFFORT TO FREE AMERICA’S HIGHWAYS AND URGES ALL PRO-AMERICANS IN NEW JERSEY TO WRITE TO THEIR STATE SENATORS IN SUPPORT OF SENATE BILL 1874!!!!!

HOWEVER, IT IS DISTURBING TO LEARN THAT THESE TWO PRECIOUS PRO-AMERICAN SOULS ARE ENTRAPPED IN POPERY!!!!!

So these fine upstanding tow two Greatest American Heroes are Catholic, is what you’re saying? Hmm, well is there anything they can do about it?

THIS MINISTRY URGES THEM TO ESCAPE ROME AS DID GOVERNOR SARAH PALIN, UNDER THE FULL MANIFEST POWER OF THE DEBORAH ANOINTING, FIND A MARK 16:18 FELLOWSHIP AND FINALLY ENJOY LIVES WITH MEANING, LEST THEY GET LEFT BEHIND TO SPEND THE REST OF THEIR LIVES…. AND ALL ETERNITY…. WITH PIAPS!!!!!

All right, thanks Americaphile. Catch you again on the next slow news day! [Americaphile]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 165 comments }

tihond May 25, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Just chilling with my Piaps.

HogeyeGrex May 25, 2012 at 6:33 pm

I guess I must have known this once, but had long since forgotten.

PIAPS, according to urban dictionary, for the ignorant like me:

this is the acronym used to describe Hillary Clinton. It stands for "Pig In A Pants Suit."

It sort of completes teh funny.

Generation[redacted] May 25, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Today, we are all entrapped in popery. At least until the weekend starts.

HogeyeGrex May 25, 2012 at 6:18 pm

Moar Poper.

Nostrildamus May 25, 2012 at 5:15 pm
Nostrildamus May 25, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Do you know he's not the Pope's butter?

BaldarTFlagass May 25, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Parkay.

Angry_Marmot May 25, 2012 at 5:52 pm

"Parkay?" cried Job, and no one likes the answer.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:32 pm

It's not nice to fool Mother Nature.

deanbooth May 25, 2012 at 6:06 pm

Know? I can't even believe it's not butter.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:05 pm

"Do you know he's not the Pope's butter?"

of course.
the pope's butter is a cute li'l billy goat who butts the Pope whenever he goes out in the Vatican backyard.

tihond May 25, 2012 at 5:22 pm

It's so hard to find good help these days.

ChilLysol May 25, 2012 at 5:23 pm

Apparently there is a site called "Vatileaks." Worst leaking site name ever.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:34 pm

I understand that there's a Pharmaceutical commercial for that now.

iburl May 25, 2012 at 5:35 pm

The Pope's butter is something completely different.
(Hint: Made with Choir Boys)

Chow Yun Flat May 25, 2012 at 7:59 pm

Guy clearly didn't think through what he was giving up by leaking documents on bribery and corruption. As the pope's butler he got to ride in the front seat of the Popemobile.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:06 pm

AND try on the red shoes when nobody was looking.

Billmatic May 25, 2012 at 5:16 pm

MAY THE CHRISTIAN LORD GUIDE MY HAND AGAINST YOUR ROMAN POPERY

Angry_Marmot May 25, 2012 at 5:53 pm

As the actress said to the bishop.

Joshua Norton May 25, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Why does everything wingnuts do end up like a combination Lawrence Welk Show and Klan meeting?

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:06 pm

Uh…
Sibling incest?

LettucePrey May 25, 2012 at 5:20 pm

How come, when you click on the link for "POPERY," you get a plaster cast of Cloris Leachman?

GemlikeFlame May 25, 2012 at 8:21 pm

You'd prefer a picture of Ratzinger? Be happy with what you got.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Maybe that's a picture of Martha Stewart and the link is misspelling "potpourri".

ifthethunderdontgetya May 25, 2012 at 5:20 pm

Speak AMERICAN, traitors!!!11!

P.S. DEBORAH ANOINTING

Who knew?
~

BaldarTFlagass May 25, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Did this come out of one of those Jack Chick cartoon pamphlets?

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:42 pm

This is my very favorite "Jack Chick" cartoon pamphlet.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:06 pm

Back when I was into the occult/witchy woo-woo stuff, it was amazing the number of people I found who believed that the Necronomicon was an actually real-life grimoire.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:18 pm

Any Tome of Secret Occult Knowledge that's sold in direct-mail catalogs is bound to be suspect. But then, I'm just a skeptic.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 8:06 pm

I have to admit that I bought a mass market paperback of it when I was a teen and I thought it was real. That was before I read any Lovecraft. Years later, I found entire threads on occult/witchy woo-woo message boards loaded with comments from people who thought it was an actual grimoire and took it very seriously.

mrpuma2u May 25, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Friggin Papists, they even ruin exclusionary racist legislation.

ChilLysol May 25, 2012 at 5:22 pm

What kind of poopery is this?

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 5:55 pm

And does it have peanuts in it?

Dudleydidwrong May 25, 2012 at 10:51 pm

Mitt's dog?

SorosBot May 25, 2012 at 5:22 pm

NEEDS MOAR MISPELING AND INSANTY!!!!!!!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Or piss-smelling, which is much more likely.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:08 pm

And neck tattoos, gotta have the neck tattoos.

Barb May 25, 2012 at 5:24 pm

I think the tests should be given in Navajo or some other Native American language. They were here first, ya know.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 5:33 pm

That would kill me daid from larfingk.

Barb May 25, 2012 at 5:41 pm

"You sheep????" Ewe hurt my feelings. : )

CZL May 25, 2012 at 7:37 pm

Goat on with your bad self.

Barb May 25, 2012 at 8:24 pm

OMG Gully, I was kidding. See the smiley face. I didn't want you to delete your super funny comment.

Schmannnity May 25, 2012 at 5:24 pm

Gov. Christie says America is a Judeo-Crisco nation.

weejee May 25, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Chrispie Creme is a fat in the can fan?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 5:33 pm

And who should know better than His Behemothitude?

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:52 pm

He probably eats it by the handful. Using both hands.

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 5:25 pm

TOW TWO

Code?

Or did somebody try to slip in a 2 for 1 towing promotion?

tihond May 25, 2012 at 5:27 pm

When you're rocking the crazy, you don't correct your mistakes, you double down.

memzilla May 25, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Hey, you got your popery in my japery!

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Sounds like a lot of jiggery pokery to me.

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 6:34 pm

That, and the hanky panky, is what got the Church into the trouble it's in today.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:22 pm

And the Huggery-Buggery also. But that's only because of the Sexual Revolution and the Libertine society the Church is forced to lave in.

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 7:28 pm
tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Could be hocus-pocus, argle-bargle, voo-doo, or mumbo-jumbo.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:09 pm

"Hey, you got your popery in my japery!"

Oh, yeah? Well, YOU put your crockery on my napery!

not that Radio May 25, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Mark 16:18 says

they will pick up snakes with their hands

I get it now.

HogeyeGrex May 25, 2012 at 6:21 pm

I thought he was talking about Jesus' subscription to Wankbabez.com.

weejee May 25, 2012 at 5:28 pm

 

BloviateMe May 25, 2012 at 5:28 pm

If only we could tax insane ramblings…

WhatTheHeck May 25, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Wonket, what the hell. This pope story confused the shit outta me.Like a Tea party sign, I don’t know which way is up. Pope. English only. DMV. Sarah Palin. I know I haven’t been drinking as yet.

Angry_Marmot May 25, 2012 at 5:57 pm

Tanqueray and tonic with lime and just 1/8 teaspoon of sugar stirred in, ice cold. Time to catch up.

Lascauxcaveman May 25, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Hablamos Ingles aqui, motherfuckers.

iburl May 25, 2012 at 5:33 pm

This here (from that very sane site) is the shiznit: http://americaphile.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/v

Pithaughn May 25, 2012 at 6:42 pm

Silly humans, with proper brainwashing they will believe anything.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:00 pm

Needs moar strychnine drinkin'. That's when you know the holy spirit has made you a bad ass.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Maybe you should write your blogs in english first Americaphile? Ya think?

Lascauxcaveman May 25, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Wait, what? They're saying Sarah Palin, like me, is a former Catholic?

Ooh. I feel all dirty now.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 6:05 pm

Makes me want to go out right now and take the eucr…uchr..ewcher….those Necco wafer things they give me when I go with Baconz Ma on Christmas and Easter.

HempDogbane May 25, 2012 at 5:35 pm

No Choad Left Behind !

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 5:35 pm

"Word salad yummy yummy"

-The Wiggles-

nounverb911 May 25, 2012 at 5:39 pm

They speak English in Joisey?

BlueStateLibel May 25, 2012 at 6:27 pm

A strange variant of it. I was once told in a pizza parlor that I have an "English accent."

Callyson May 25, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Jesus Christ.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 6:02 pm

No where near close enough. Try again.

Barb May 25, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Hey Bitches! Rebecca said we are live-blogging: Hour One of the Barrett Walker Recall Debate, 9 p.m. EST

Get your drink on and be here with the rest of us, please. Salty snack food will be served.

Nostrildamus May 25, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Rat dicks?

Barb May 25, 2012 at 6:07 pm

No, no rat dicks. I am trying to cut back.

Angry_Marmot May 25, 2012 at 6:09 pm

Not for Walker; there're some things a rat won't do.

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 5:54 pm

How about wine coolers?

JustPixelz May 25, 2012 at 6:30 pm

Sounds like someone wants to go to the abortionplex in a couple weeks.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 6:02 pm

I recall Barrett Walker. He sat next to me in 7th grade English. He smelled like garbonzo beans for some reason.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:39 pm

I don't know if I should sober up, stay drunk, or stumble over to the corner bar for this.

Sharkey May 25, 2012 at 5:48 pm

PIAPS? IS THAT SHORT FOR PRIAPISMS?

TribecaMike May 25, 2012 at 6:02 pm

PIAPS IT IS, PIAPS NOT

DerrickWildcat May 25, 2012 at 6:03 pm

I've known about this nut for a few years. He has a weird Obsession/Hatred for Hillary Clinton. PIAPS stands for Pig In A Pant Suit. This is how he always refers to Hillary.

Sharkey May 25, 2012 at 7:58 pm

Priapism it is, then! Thanks Derrick!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:26 pm

It means that they belong to This Church, which would explain a lot.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:45 pm

I have worshiped the COCK before but now I seek out the guiding path of ASS.

randcoolcatdaddy May 25, 2012 at 5:51 pm

"HOWEVER, IT IS DISTURBING TO LEARN THAT THESE TWO PRECIOUS PRO-AMERICAN SOULS ARE ENTRAPPED IN POPERY!!!!!"

I suppose that's better than wearing magic underwear.

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Yup. There it is again.

X = DefinitelyNot(X)

Excluding all languages but English = BULWARK (*luv that word) AGAINST BIGOTRY AND RACISM

You can create your own reverse-exclusionary equations at home …

*Sounds like someone has their college freshman English Major home for the summer, helping out.

sbj1964 May 25, 2012 at 5:57 pm

This must have come from the GOP think tank known as The family values council.( Motto:Making life better through hate.)

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 5:58 pm

unrelated to this post

Baconz is going to get stinking drunk on double screw drivers and watch Ben Folds.

(This comment is 100% snark free)

Barb May 25, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Party on, Wayne!

sullivanst May 25, 2012 at 5:58 pm

It appears to be crazymotherfucker religiousnut Friday. Thank FSM there's a long weekend to recover from it.

Fairtackle May 25, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Remarkably coherent for a teaparty diatribe.

Maman May 25, 2012 at 6:00 pm

Rebecca, it is cruel to link that, because now I am fighting the urge to post on them.

I was thinking about pointing out that none of them would be "appropriately" Xtian without the catlicks.

StarsUponThars May 25, 2012 at 6:01 pm

I don't know what's more scary about that photo, the incidental devil horns made of the collar of the man standing behind him or the look of sheer evil on Popeman's face. I'm calling it a toss-up.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Pope Ratzy looks evil in every picture of him I've ever seen.
Also, I'm not 100% convinced he's not Zell Miller and/or Robert Blake.

TribecaMike May 25, 2012 at 6:01 pm

Forget it Jake, it's Bergen County Town.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 6:04 pm

If you are trapped in Popery:

1) Remain Calm
2) Do Not ingest any water, wine or crackers. They could be tainted with Pope Magic.
3) Activate the Protestant Signal. Help will arrive soon
5) Be aware of Signs and Portents
4) Be careful not to overreact and become a Hebrew, Mahomettan or Hindoo

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 6:08 pm

OK, thanx folks. We have our winner for today. You can all go home now.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:08 pm

But I'm just gettin' started!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:28 pm

5) Never, under any circumstances, fondle any beads.

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:12 pm

6) Should you find yourself stricken with a case of glossolalia do not panic. This is just a sign that you are no longer under the influence of the Pope's spells.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:23 pm

7) Just relax. The poisonous snakes can't hurt you.

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 7:24 pm

If I'm under the influence of the Pope's spells what's my savings throw to get out of it?

tessiee May 26, 2012 at 7:12 pm

"Never, under any circumstances, fondle any beads."

::fap::?

C_R_Eature May 26, 2012 at 7:15 pm

"Never, under any circumstances, fondle any beads."

EDIT: "While anyone is watching"

EDIT II: "Unless you want them to."

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 6:31 pm

It wasn't my fault. I didn't want to go there, but they weakened my will with the smells and bells and those hats. My God, those fabulous hats. It's like the Ascot Opening Race Scene in My Fair Lady. The next thing I knew I was confessing my sins, saying Hail Marys and telling the rosary like a 98 year old Italian grandmother.

AddHomonym May 25, 2012 at 6:41 pm

5) Profit!

DahBoner May 26, 2012 at 4:45 pm

4) Or Aqua Buddist.

comrad_darkness May 25, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Are the whack jobs in Jersey going to revert to banning the Irish from employment? I mean, they have to hate on someone when all the browns are gone, right?

deanbooth May 25, 2012 at 6:10 pm

Do you think that would fit on my van?

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 6:39 pm

Depends. You thinking inkjet printer, or stencils?

CivicHoliday May 25, 2012 at 6:14 pm

what in the ever loving fuck

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 6:16 pm

I always liked when they did "popery" jokes on Laugh In.

HogeyeGrex May 25, 2012 at 6:17 pm

So, is 1874 the bill's number, or the date they're trying to drag the country back to?

CrunchyKnee May 25, 2012 at 6:18 pm

I thought popery was that stuff my moms used to put in my room to cover up the stink of gym socks and weed?

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 6:23 pm

Pope, pope, pope
Pope of Rome, Rome, Rome
Pope of Rome, Rome, Rome
Pope of Rome

As I walk around St. Peter's Dome
No one can stop the Pope of Rome
The Vatican's my fuckin' home
It's good to be the Pope of Rome

OK, I'll stop before Gene Chandler hunts me down and cuts me like a bitch.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 6:43 pm

Michael O' Donoghue, no?

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Damn but you're good!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:57 pm

All things considered, I'd rather be Doing the Vatican Rag.

BlueStateLibel May 25, 2012 at 6:23 pm

Why not just have the driving test in Latin?

Wile E. Barbote May 25, 2012 at 7:25 pm

I think the quality of drivers has gone downhill since they started giving the driving test in the vernacular.

Buckminster May 27, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Sic Gloria Mundi

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:27 pm

Don't worry about the Pope. How many Divisions does he have?

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 6:28 pm

I used to like Popery Tarts as a child.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:13 pm

So you liked spinach-filled tarts?
Oh, wait.
Those are Popeye tarts.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 9:40 pm

You know what happened when the Pope went to Mount Olive?

smokefilledroommate May 25, 2012 at 6:34 pm

..make English available to all
Like the driver's license written exam is an English tutorial.

smokefilledroommate May 25, 2012 at 6:36 pm

'Demlibs' is almost as good as 'Libunatic'.

JustPixelz May 25, 2012 at 6:37 pm

They may as well give the test using dog whistles.

Lucidamente1 May 25, 2012 at 6:39 pm

“We are Republicans, and don't propose to leave our party and identify ourselves with the party whose antecedents have been rum, Romanism, and rebellion.”

HogeyeGrex May 25, 2012 at 6:40 pm

And if that wasn't loopy enough to bankrupt you at the nearest bar, try this one on for size.

From the same website,

DID YOU KNOW THAT THE ROMAN POPE ORDERED TO JESUITS TO SINK THE TITANIC IN 1912?!?!?!?!

Holy shitehammers

Butch_Wagstaff May 25, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Cheez-Its Christ. I thought I'd saw enough crazy from clicking on the links included in this post.
I'm starting to think that maybe the site exists just to pull people's legs. But then I think no satirist, however good they may be, could come up with that high level of WTF?

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:25 pm

I'll bet that Aliens ate his Buick, too.

johnnyzhivago May 25, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Michael Doherty is my state senator – Catholic, Schmatholic – the guy is an asshole.

johnnyzhivago May 25, 2012 at 6:42 pm

BTW, Michael Doherty – I'd prefer you spend your time keeping lousy drivers off the road – instead of people who don't speak english.

BlueStateLibel May 25, 2012 at 6:44 pm

NJ Driving Test Question:
When is it appropriate to give someone the finger?
a) The asshole just cut you off.
b) The asshole cut you off and then slowed down to 65 mph.
c) The asshole cut you off and then ratted you out to the Feds.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:26 pm

d) All of the above.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:18 pm

a) and b) only; if someone rats you out to the Feds, they're going to get, um, [makes finger quotes] "hit by a drunk driver" before the end of the week.

smokefilledroommate May 25, 2012 at 6:44 pm

Wow, they even link to that horrible 'Press '1' for English' song.. Nice!

James Michael Curley May 25, 2012 at 6:46 pm

I worked two campaigns against Cardinale. He is so vicious that when one of my candidates called him to offer a concession (as was traditional) he told his son, or campaign worker, to tell my guy that he doesn't talk to losers.

This guy is a dentist and perennially tries to push bills through the State Legislature which would allow dentists to dispense the prescriptions they fill. I have been in states where they allow that (like California) and many have changed it because the doctors and dentists gouged the patient.

Think "Is it safe yet?" and you have this guy's personality and demeanor.

We once engaged in a little heated discussion and he called me a Mick.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:29 pm

You're not an Anti-Dentite now, are you?

radio-of-owls May 25, 2012 at 6:57 pm

An online/windshield ministry sharing the truth in these last days!!!!!

Well I, for one, have always sought out windshields when seeking the truth.

Jukesgrrl May 25, 2012 at 6:59 pm

You know those people who have an abnormal fear of clowns? I have an abnormal fear of the Swiss Guard, a subset of clowns.

chascates May 25, 2012 at 7:39 pm

So, is the 'Whore of Rome' behind the purgatory-length waits at the DMV?

TribecaMike May 25, 2012 at 7:45 pm

What appetizer is on the menu of every New Jersey Baptist-owned Indian restaurant?

il Papa Dumb.

AlaskaGrrl May 25, 2012 at 7:46 pm

IT IS DISTURBING TO LEARN THAT THESE TWO PRECIOUS PRO-AMERICAN SOULS ARE ENTRAPPED IN POPERY!!!!!

Not anti catholic, just a typo. They are entrapped in poopery.

extreme_left May 25, 2012 at 8:35 pm

Wonkette fail: they mean trapped by Potpourri, these poor people have so much potpourri around the house the stench is so bad it isolates them and they cannot set foot in the outside world as it's lack of potpourri has become an offensive smell, trapping them in a world of loneliness.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:00 pm

"We did not understand the first word in your link back to your previous post about how “English-only” driving tests protect against bigotry and racism"

By attracting only the frisky, aggressive drivers, and selecting out for the ones who are asleep under a cactus in the corner.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:01 pm

"LEST THEY GET LEFT BEHIND TO SPEND THE REST OF THEIR LIVES…. AND ALL ETERNITY…. WITH PIAPS!!!!!"

With polyps?
With priapism?
Neither one goes well with my left behind.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:03 pm

*sings*
Rome, Rome, you're just fine,
You have all those ancestors of mine.
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word,
And each Christian is fed to a lion.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 9:15 pm

I think we finally found the guy who owns this camper:
http://wonkette.com/449226/wingnut-camper-art-pro

lizunyan May 25, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Nobody can convince me that this website isn't an elaborate and admittedly hilarious troll. Infact, I am positives about it.

cogitoergodavsm May 26, 2012 at 7:26 pm

I've been following Ralph for years. No one as unhinged as he sounds would be allowed use of a computer in the institution to which he's been committed. This is actually relatively mild. He used to refer to "AMERICA'S GREATEST PRESIDENT, GEORGE W. BUSH!!!!!" and to Hillary Clinton (PIAPS) as a lesbian Antichrist. His solution to immigration is an alligator infested moat along the Mexican border, and Dobermans patrolling the Canadian border.
He hates the Irish.
boy, does he hate the Irish.

lizunyan May 25, 2012 at 9:27 pm
DahBoner May 26, 2012 at 4:43 pm

Will it be the Queen's English? Or NASCAR American English?

ChapterUndVerse May 26, 2012 at 5:25 pm

Tim Minchin is now playing in my head. http://vimeo.com/11338327

Where do I sign up for the World Sapphic Socialist Caliphate?

ttommyunger May 26, 2012 at 11:03 pm

"Sieg…" Whaaaaa?

Buckminster May 27, 2012 at 1:00 pm

As soon as these two can write a post in English, they can haz driver's license.

TribecaMike May 28, 2012 at 1:11 am

Who died and made him pope? Oh wait…

lulzmonger May 29, 2012 at 7:04 am

Poe's Law conundrum?
PIAPS, PIAPS not.

SenileAgitation May 29, 2012 at 9:33 am

According to Urban Dict. PIAPS is an anti-Hillary Cliinton acronym for Pig In A Pant Suit. I'm glad that's all it is. I thought it might be a Deborah annointed end times thing!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 7:31 pm

Hey, that's a good one! * dashed off quick note to Vatican*

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