NAME RANK AND SERIAL NUMBER  1:23 pm May 25, 2012

How Dare This ‘Out-Of-Bounds’ Reporter Ask Jesse Kelly About His White Supremacist Pals? (Video)

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Not at all a terrifying young fascistThe last time we said ‘hey’ to young Jesse Kelly, he was running for Miss Teen USA, and it went a little something like this: Healthcare, right or privilege?

My belief system is this. The health care for anybody but especially for our nation. The highest quality and lowest cost can only be delivered without the government. What I believe is that all things we drive, we do, health care, anything, is a privilege to some extent. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, those are inalienable rights endowed by your creator. If you’re claiming a right, if you’re going to say anything’s a right, if you’re going to say you have a right to a cell phone, then who has the responsibility to pay for it? That’s what I believe.

Good times! But now, faced with outrageously “out-of-bounds” questions about ALIPAC, who are these nice neo-Nazis and white supremacists who keep endorsing him for Gabby Giffords’s old seat, he has learned a thing or two about how to stay on script, and stay on script, and stay on script. That was TWO YEARS AGO (and last week). And palling around with terrorists only counts when it is Bill Ayers and black guys. Anyway, have some smirking robot.

Jesse Kelly, why do you keep accepting endorsements from neo-Nazis and white supremacists?

We feel like we have heard this somewhere before? But honestly, it’s the only way a true hero should respond when faced with The Enemy that is a free and lamestream press.

[KGUN9, via DailyKos]

 
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{ 160 comments }

nounverb911 May 25, 2012 at 1:26 pm

ALI PAC that's Muslin, right?

YasserArraFeck May 25, 2012 at 2:52 pm

No, that would be Ali-Pak-Paki-Paki-Stan-Stan

KenLayIsAlive May 25, 2012 at 5:40 pm

I only accept endorsements from Ali-G PAC

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 1:27 pm

The closed captioning is a hoot!. So are the three witches from MacBeth in the background

Texan_Bulldog May 25, 2012 at 1:28 pm

I can't figure out why that black woman is laughing that a white supremacist organization endorsed her candidate. I guess even the black people are crazy in AZ.

ingloriousbytch May 25, 2012 at 2:29 pm

The Black Crusaders need to have a chat with her.

christianmaxwell May 25, 2012 at 6:54 pm

Hahaha. That episode was just on last week. Very nice. On a more serious note, there are 1-2% of black voters that have had a big cup of the Republican Kool-Aid and gone back for seconds: Michael Steele, Clarence Thomas, and apparently the woman in this video.

YasserArraFeck May 25, 2012 at 2:54 pm

You see, skin color is, after all, only skin deep. AZ KRAZY, on the other hand, goes right down to the bone (in other words, it's easier to step out of your skin than it is to make a batshit crazy Arizoner sane)

swordfis May 25, 2012 at 4:03 pm

maybe she's the only one that gets it.

OkieDokieDog May 25, 2012 at 1:28 pm

Is he Sharron Angle's son?

Nevar furgit!! Sharron Angle: Press should 'ask the questions we want to answer'

Generation[redacted] May 25, 2012 at 1:38 pm

I don't know that they are white supremacists. Some of them look Asian to me.

ManchuCandidate May 25, 2012 at 1:29 pm

You can't spell Arizona without Nazi.

rickmaci May 25, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Aronazianna
Aryanzona

swordfis May 25, 2012 at 4:05 pm

Is Jesse representing [Arizona] [or a Nazi]?

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 1:29 pm

"Pay no attention to the Nazis behind the curtain!"

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:02 pm

CRE! You're back! (Hugs the CRE_ature)

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 3:11 pm

I'm back, baby! (8-armed squeeze)

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Nothing like a cephalopod dance of affection!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Ink-Free! And also: Happy Towel Day!

ChernobylSoup May 25, 2012 at 1:29 pm

NPR interviewed one of his supporters this morning. By the sound of her voice I reckon she looked a lot like the heavy-set North Carolina woman that graced Wonkette earlier today. She really hated that Gabby got shot and all, but gosh, Giffords shoulda resigned from Congress just as soon as the bullet went in her head.

Nice people this Kelly fella pals around with.

YasserArraFeck May 25, 2012 at 2:56 pm

but gosh, Giffords shoulda resigned from Congress just as soon as the bullet went in her head

Some folks jus' won't take a hint

nounverb911 May 25, 2012 at 1:29 pm

"Some of my best friends are Neo-Nazis."

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:49 pm

How true.

edgydrifter May 25, 2012 at 1:29 pm

Jesse Kelly's All-American Energy Independence Plan: MORE WHITE POWER.

imissopus May 25, 2012 at 1:39 pm

It's apparently a renewable resource.

ManchuCandidate May 25, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Stupidity and inflated sense of importance/self worth/entitlement is an infinite resource.

MittsHairHelmet May 25, 2012 at 1:50 pm

*MORE WHITE POW(D)ER

MittsHairHelmet May 25, 2012 at 1:30 pm

That face has "punch me" written all over it.

sewollef May 25, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Gotta put my glasses back on, I can only read C-U-N-T across his forehead. Funny that.

jjdaddyo May 25, 2012 at 3:52 pm

That, and "You will get me out of the closet when you pry it from my cold, dead, pink tie wearing fingers."

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 1:30 pm

So his campaign is focused on what now?

Lascauxcaveman May 25, 2012 at 1:30 pm

What's the reboot procedure on this particular model of defective robot? A punch in the throat?

prommie May 25, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Use the heel of your shoe to depress the "Reboot" button built into the adam's apple.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Hatey-hatey stabby-stabby?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Sounds good. Let's try it?

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 1:30 pm

"health care, anything, is a privilege to some extent. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, those are inalienable rights endowed by your creator"

Fucking Christ Parachuting into a pond. Do thses douche bags realize how quickly they contradict themselves. I'm not joking, in the same fucking breath. HEALTHCARE NOT A RIGHT BUT LIFE IS! LIFE IT'S THE FIRST OF THE INALIENABLE RIGHTS. WE HAVE THE INALIENABLE RIGHT NOT TO FUCKING DIE THERE FORE HEALTH CARE IS A INALIENABLE RIGHT ASS HAT!!!!!!!

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 1:50 pm

BACONZ!

Nice hit – knocked it outta the park again!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Baconzgood.

Damn, I got to say that twice in two days!

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 3:49 pm

I love when you rub my pork belly.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:07 pm

OH-Eeeeenk! (rubs Baconz pork belly vigorously)

TanzbodenKoenig May 25, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Tell us how you really feel there, Baconz

natoslug May 25, 2012 at 3:23 pm

You only have a right to life until you die. And it doesn't have to be a healthy or happy life.

Monsieur_Grumpe May 25, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Yeah, stick with the important questions like:
Boxers or briefs?
Ginger or Mary Ann?
What’s your favorite Teenage Mutant Turtle?
Is your dog a racist too?

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 1:52 pm

MRS HOWELL LIBELZ!!

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 1:59 pm

"What’s your favorite Teenage Mutant Turtle?"

Well, we can rule out the three with Wop names right from the git-go.
"Rafael" still isn't 100% Murkin, but at least the Rafaels in Arizona do a good job mowing the lawn and cleaning the pool, so I guess they're OK.

Sharkey May 25, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Don't ask, or don't tell?

Beowoof May 25, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Well Mary Ann, the rest is just meaningless trivia.

Monsieur_Grumpe May 25, 2012 at 9:50 pm

well duh.

widestanceromance May 25, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Does my vacant stare and my inadequate head make my oversized torso look fat? Seriously, is this guy wearing shoulder pads or a mattress pad?

MrFizzy May 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

I think the body is normal but some tribesmen pre-shrunk his head. Evidently not much was lost in the process.

Beowoof May 25, 2012 at 6:41 pm

The unusually small head size should be a warning sign that there isn't much room for gray matter in there. Not that it matters in batshit crazy Arizona.

Joshua Norton May 25, 2012 at 1:32 pm

The highest quality and lowest cost can only be delivered without the government.

Oh yes! Because it's worked so well so far.

noodlesalad May 25, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Evolution, government oversight, women's rights, it's like America gets a bad case of the stoopids every 70 years or so.

Beowoof May 25, 2012 at 6:42 pm

Sure, look at air traffic control they have planes running into each other all the time.

SorosBot May 25, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Sadly, the white supremacist endorsement may help in the fucked-up world of Arizona.

HippieEsq May 25, 2012 at 3:48 pm

Next to Joe Arpaio, maybe it's the most important endorsement!

horsedreamer_1 May 25, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Rehnquist will have you know he was disenfranchising & marginalizing Messicans when OL JOE wad a two bit Dago on an East Coast constabulary force.

nounverb911 May 25, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Cassius Clay called, he wants his name back.

prommie May 25, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Speaking of, guilt by association, wasn't it sheer genius for Karl Rove to have Bin Laden endorse Gore right before the election?

Fox n Fiends May 25, 2012 at 7:32 pm

yah mean Kerry

LastGasp May 25, 2012 at 1:34 pm

… if you’re going to say you have a right to a cell phone, then who has the responsibility to pay for it? That’s what I believe.

That's an incredibly thought-provoking and erudite observation. Obviously, political theory is this man's strong suit.

YasserArraFeck May 25, 2012 at 2:58 pm

Obviously, political theory is this man's strong suit.

Better than the crappy suit he's wearing – looks like his big brother's

OhNoGuy May 27, 2012 at 9:51 pm

Great color. Bird shit green. Looks perfect on him.

YasserArraFeck May 29, 2012 at 4:10 pm

It's amazing what a good tailor can do with an SS uniform when he takes all the hardware off

Joshua Norton May 25, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Jesse Kelly, why do you keep accepting endorsements from neo-Nazis and white supremacists?

Those labels are so 15 minutes ago. The new PC wingnut term is "American Exeptionalists".

MrFizzy May 25, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Unfortunately, being a complete fucking stooge doesn't disqualify anyone from winning public office, particularly in Arizona.

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 2:34 pm

In Arizona, being a fucking stooge gives you an advantage.

pdiddycornchips May 25, 2012 at 2:57 pm

It appears to be a requirement, at least for Republicans. As does loving guns and hating brown people and all vajajay's regardless of color.

Lucidamente1 May 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

"Now if you'll excuse me, I've got interviews to do with Peggy Noonan and Mark Halperin."

weejee May 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

 

noodlesalad May 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

This guy clearly has the smarts, charisma, and the ability to think on his feet that America needs. Wait, he's not applying to be a special needs bathroom cleaner at McDonalds? Fuck this guy, then.

Schmannnity May 25, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Saguaro you saying is no comment?

Lucidamente1 May 25, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Makes one long for the thoughtful, statesmanlike answers of Joe Miller.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I'm not watching this fuck head.

Barb May 25, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Come sit next to me, Baconz. I'm not watching either.

UnholyMoses May 25, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Let's be honest — this will probably help the guy get some votes.

This is, after all, the state that didn't want an MLK holiday.

Oblios_Cap May 25, 2012 at 1:37 pm

What I believe is that all things we drive, we do, health care, anything, is a privilege to some extent.

But I do all of those things and more to accomplish my unalienable right to be happy.

I guess what he was trying to say was that those things are only for the privileged.

sewollef May 25, 2012 at 1:38 pm

I too listened to NPR early this morning, where they interviewed some teabagger harpie belonging to Kelly's gang, who actually blamed Gabrielle Giffords for not thinking about her constituents and resigning sooner.

Blamed Gabrielle Giffords. On the media. Both my wife and I went, "WHAAAT THE FUCK!!!!"

ChernobylSoup May 25, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Check this nerd out… he listens to NPR!

sewollef May 25, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Gosh, thanks! :)

Sharkey May 25, 2012 at 1:49 pm

And has a wife!

ManchuCandidate May 25, 2012 at 1:52 pm

From Canada City!

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Her name is Incontinentia Buttocks.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 2:23 pm

Wait until Biggus Dickus hears of this!

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Yes but it most unfortunately is NOT the subversive vehicle for intelligence, compassion and thoughtful reporting it was back in my college days. More's the pity.

Sharkey May 25, 2012 at 2:03 pm

The commercials are pretty good, though.

NellCote71 May 25, 2012 at 2:55 pm

Elitist.

TeaNuts May 25, 2012 at 1:38 pm

Ok Arizona, please secede already. And take Texas with you! What a bunch of Dumblefucks.

fartknocker May 25, 2012 at 1:56 pm

We Texans look to West and say "I'm glad I don't live in Arizona. That's one fucked up place." Also, the cool people of Austin like America. Place exempt us from succession.

Thank you,
Fartknocker

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:12 pm

Texas used to be a true-blue Democratic state with the likes of Ann Richards and Molly Ivins. And I love Austin too much to let it go.

HistoriBarb May 25, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Who does Barbara Jordan have to inspire around here to get a little respect?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 9:16 pm

HistoriBARB, obvy.

Callyson May 25, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Wow, and we think Mittens is a robot? He's got some serious competition for that label from this guy…

PubOption May 25, 2012 at 5:50 pm

I thought this guy was more of a parrot.

Callyson May 25, 2012 at 1:42 pm

Also, how hilarious is it that the reporter hails from a network called "KGUN9"?

iburl May 25, 2012 at 1:45 pm

"You kin twist it all up and say "White Supremacist" and "Nazi" and all but people are free to take it however they want, or they can just go away, I mean, really, to simplify, yes, the bible." – Fat Stupid North Carolina Cunt

MissTaken May 25, 2012 at 1:45 pm

I feel bad for New Mexico being stuck between Texas and Nazi Berlin like that.

JustPixelz May 25, 2012 at 4:27 pm

"New Mexico" sounds kinda … you know, Mexican. Let's rename it "Barb's State". Also rename New Jersey just plain "joyzee".

Callyson May 25, 2012 at 1:46 pm

"Our campaign is going to stay focused on lowering gas prices, creating jobs, and lowering taxes."

Oh, so that means you'll work to put a stop to the warmongering over Iran (which is a key driver of the recent gas price increases)? You'll be unlike the 2010 Reeps who said they would focus like a laser on jobs, only to turn around and go after those sluts who want birth control? And I take it you'll stand against the idea that some of your Reeps have to tax the poors even more by imposing an income tax on them when they have too little income to tax and already pay up in payroll, sales, gas taxes and the like?

Yeah, I don't believe him either…

SayItWithWookies May 25, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Apparently that jackass who's claiming to be Dan Quayle's son is a stinkin' liar — this guy's got the real goods on the legacy of "Robin to George Bush's Batman."

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 2:03 pm

"that jackass who's claiming to be Dan Quayle's son"

???
I thought bush 43 was the offspring of the unholy union of Bush 41 and Dan Quayle.

KenLayIsAlive May 25, 2012 at 5:48 pm

hahaha. TOTILLY GROSE but good.

comrad_darkness May 25, 2012 at 1:47 pm

You know, the democrats we have are no great shakes, but the loon to sane ratio in the republican party is reaching speculative bubble proportions here. Is it possible that our 1% corporate masters are overreaching with finding the stupidest puppets they can?

ifthethunderdontgetya May 25, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Is it possible that our 1% corporate masters are overreaching

As in heads they win, tails they still win?

No, they're not overreaching.

They need the repukes to act up as serious loonies just to provide our corporate-owned right-wing Dems with the cover that they need to keep their base voting for them. Even as those right-wing Dems screw their base on issue after issue.
~

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:14 pm

That's an interesting point of view, comrad. In fact, I would like to subscribe to your newsletters.

SoBeach May 25, 2012 at 1:49 pm

That reporter can officially, legitimately lead his story with "Candidate Repeatedly Refuses to Disavow White Supremacist Supporters". Yuk it up, dingbat. You won't think you're so cute and clever when people start making the entirely reasonable assumption that you're A-OK with the nazis.

FlownOver May 25, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Note to reporters – The correct form of coverage of this assholery is: "When given the opportunity to comment, ___________ repeatedly refused to answer any questions about _________________."

Pretty soon the refusal to answer becomes the issue, and if his opponents can't take advantage of that gigantic opening they don't deserve the office.

And yes, Jesse Kelly qualifies as a "gigantic opening."

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:14 pm

Of the nether regions. An evacuation of bowelandia, if you will.

TanzbodenKoenig May 25, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Made it 3 seconds until the shitstack opened his mouth. Do I get a prize?

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Butbutbut, Reverend Wright, and such!

PuckStopsHere May 25, 2012 at 1:53 pm

What an asshole. I like to think I'd put that microphone right in his mouth. Hard.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Needz moar neck tattoo.

Blueb4sunrise May 25, 2012 at 1:54 pm

I have my BS detector set to its' lowest setting since this fuckwad has been airing his ads, otherwise it'll overload .

Geminisunmars May 25, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Well, what kind of questions do you expect from a reporter who has a Menorah sticking out of his head?

ElPinche May 25, 2012 at 1:55 pm

This is good news for Jesse Kelly.
Seriously afterall ,it's Arizona, USA's anus.

tessiee May 25, 2012 at 1:56 pm

"health care, anything, is a privilege to some extent"

Unless you're a fetus, of course.

JustPixelz May 25, 2012 at 4:29 pm

I was a fetus. It was the best 3/4 year of my life. There were no Repubicans. I was the 1%. And talk about socialism — all my needs were taken care of by the Mommy State.

prommie May 25, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Anybody else got anybody else left in their office? I am about to skedaddle off into the summer weekend and dust off my seersucker pants and have me exactly one, just one martini, come 5:00. I use a 4-Our Father and 1 Hail Mary pour count on that martini, because I believe in moderation in all things, especially sobriety and virtue. Adieu, mon freres!

Geminisunmars May 25, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Ta ta. See you Tuesday?

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 2:00 pm

I'm out in five minutes. Margaritas on the veranda of this nice restaurant, then sober up and ride all weekend.

MissTaken May 25, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Got 4 more hours until I can blow this pop-stand. Oh goodie.

SheriffRoscoe May 25, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Bon weekend, prommie!

Note: It's totally okay to bastardize the French language with English words again, due to the fact that a socialist won the Presidency!

prommie May 25, 2012 at 2:05 pm

oui, pas probleme, nowadays.

Jus_Wonderin May 25, 2012 at 2:05 pm

We are seriously under staffed today. That's fine though, makes my day more relaxing. I am taking off early too. Have a great weekend!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

I'm in my Fortified Compound office now and I'll be here all weekend. I'm not going anywhere with blithering fuckweasels like this roaming free.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:53 pm

Hahaha. Stocked up on booze and comestibles, I hope? We're off to scour the curtilage for evidence of weeds in a bit, partner's headed to the store for ribs and what-all. Enjoy your hideout!

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Oh, I'm well provisioned, thanks and planning on going into town as little as possible or not at all. The Natives get Weird when I surface, as if I'm going to eat them. Well, as if I'm going to eat all of them. Nervous Nellies.

Enjoy your Partner, Ribs and What-all. I'm going to pop in at times all weekend and post amusing outrages when I can.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:18 pm

Maybe it's time to quit getting dressed up in Cthulhu costume for those little visits to town?

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Still have a couple of hours to go. Then it's sangria on the deck. Or maybe bourbon. Maybe both.

natoslug May 25, 2012 at 3:24 pm

I'm still in the office (well, the abandoned home with Internet access that I've used as an office for the past 1.5 months), but plan on taking an extended lunch and seeing if my code fixes can wait until Tuesday.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:50 pm

It's the fuckin' weekend, prommie, and a long weekend, at that. A votre sante, I lift a glass for you.

JustPixelz May 25, 2012 at 4:35 pm

ooooh! The "fucking weekend". Like me, comes but once a year.

Geminisunmars May 25, 2012 at 1:57 pm

This stance of redundantly repetitively repeating your talking points worked so well for Mike Coffman (who is now making the rounds here in Colo trying to explain himself).

OldWhiteLies May 25, 2012 at 2:00 pm

I just love that those womenz in the background seem to be having some happy-funneez from this asshat's responses. That's the only thing that makes listening to Mr. BustedRecord for more than ten seconds even possible for me.

SheriffRoscoe May 25, 2012 at 2:06 pm

I wish the reporter would say "Sorry I don't speak tea-tard."

shortsandpants May 25, 2012 at 2:07 pm

I hope he doesn't accidentally point his gun the wrong way. That would be just so awful-bad! A travesty! A plague on man! We can't have that! How will he pay his medical bills?

Chichikovobarb May 25, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Well, well. Mr. Kelly has committed a few words from the Declaration of Independence to memory, though I'm not ruling out that he wrote them on his hand. Just think how much it would expand his world if he could hold more than 10 words in his head at once:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–

Hmmm…. "among these are" eh? So those aren't the only ones, just the ones he chooses to mention. Let's go on:

That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness

Hmmm…. "Right of the People" to form governments that "seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness…."

I wonder who I'll trust. This cementhead, or the author of the Declaration, who was said to be a smart guy.

MiniMencken May 25, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Whoa, Nelly! He nailed that smarmy journo-punk but good!

OneYieldRegular May 25, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Look, nobody would pay Republicans any attention if they didn't reach out to bigots and extremists.

valthemus May 25, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Look at him givin' that lamestream media cipher what for! You go, you racist wingnut mental defective! Transparency and intelligent discourse are for fuckin' sissies!

ingloriousbytch May 25, 2012 at 2:26 pm

These reporters aren't playing this the right way. After the third repeat answer, they need to take the questions is a different direction.

"Jesse, while you're getting blowjobs from hustlers in the men's room at the Rod and Shaft what is your campaign going to focus on?"

"Jesse, what is the biggest lie you've told in this campaign?"

"Jesse, are you repeating yourself because you're stoned or because you're tweaking. Repeat your last statement if it's the first and repeat your last statement if it's the second."

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 3:54 pm

I like the way you think, inglorious.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 2:28 pm

"Don't be Schtoopit, be a Schmarty! Come undt join ze Nazi Republican Party!"

owhatever May 25, 2012 at 2:31 pm

I watched the video but missed the part about lowering gas prices and taxes and creating jobs. Think he might repeat it?

Exhausted66 May 25, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Do you know who else wouldn't answer questions about Nazi….

Wait, that's not gonna work this time.

Generation[redacted] May 25, 2012 at 4:17 pm

Sgt Schultz?

a_pink_poodle May 25, 2012 at 3:10 pm

What a man does with a black family's lawn is his own business!

FlownOver May 25, 2012 at 4:07 pm

The inability to "leave early" is the downside of working at home.

Well, that and the all-too-accessible fridge being so much closer than the treadmill.

natoslug May 25, 2012 at 4:46 pm

No, they're fixes. I'm castrating the player calls. The last thing the world needs is more baby video.– Nathan

pinkocommi May 25, 2012 at 4:48 pm

"Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, those are inalienable rights endowed by your creator. "

If we point out to this guy that most people at some point won't have a life without healthcare, will his head explode? Please?

KenLayIsAlive May 25, 2012 at 5:46 pm

How am I supposed to keep my Nazi past secret when these Jew reporters keep asking about it?

Beowoof May 25, 2012 at 6:39 pm

Did I just have a flashback to one of my sister's talking dolls from the 60's? Pull the string and it says the same lame thing over and over.

extreme_left May 25, 2012 at 8:51 pm

IG-88 has taken human form.

ttommyunger May 26, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Not spending what little time I have left watching this moron. Fuck him, his supporters, his dog and the horse he rode in on.

lulzmonger May 29, 2012 at 7:00 am

Needs more LOWER GAS PRICES, USING AMERICAN ENERGY, LOWER TAXES, & CREATING JERBS.

*desu*

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 25, 2012 at 4:04 pm

Happy Towel Day, you hoopy frood.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Costume? I don't have to wear a costume.

HistoriBarb May 25, 2012 at 9:13 pm

I'm sorry – it's the hat. You just look too much like you're in the Catholic hierarchy … I think I would fear for my children's safety too.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 9:44 pm

Oh, you needn't worry. I think children are delicious delightful.

HistoriBarb May 25, 2012 at 10:11 pm

Touche

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