GOP  9:08 am May 25, 2012

Why Won’t The Democrats Compromise On The Budget Like Republicans Do?

by Kris E. Benson

Would you buy a used car from this man?Congressional Representative Robert J. Dold, a Republican (because SHOCKER) from Illinois, is a self-described “small business owner” from Illinois who is very, very concerned about the deficit. As all Very Serious People know, the deficit is the Most Important Challenge facing America today, and it’s not going to fix itself! It will take very specific, nuanced policy prescriptions like: “working together” and “finding common ground” so we can “spur the economy.” It’s just “common sense” that we can solemnly nod our heads in shared agreement about which platitudes best describe the correct course of action for addressing this non-problem. “Enough is enough,” by golly! (Democrats, he is talking to you!)

As Representative Dold wrote in The Hill yesterday:

Clearly, there is no one-size-fits-all solution to the fiscal crisis that faces our nation. We can’t just raise taxes on millionaires and we can’t just cut spending and expect that everything will be fine.  We must work together, find common ground, and move forward policies that will put our nation back on a sustainable economic path.  There are a lot of things we can agree on.  We know that we need to rein in spending and we know that we need pro-growth tax reform.  These are places that we can start to come together and find bipartisan agreement amongst Independents, Republicans, and Democrats.  We have no other choice if we are truly serious about spurring the economy and empowering businesses to hire more workers.

Clearly, raising taxes on millionaires will accomplish far less than gutting Medicare and forcing Income Disadvantaged Americans to work until they drop dead, it is COMMON SENSE.

First and foremost, we must begin to operate on a budget. Every family in this nation operates on a budget. They know that if they spend more than they make, that they will be in serious financial trouble.  The CBO is telling the government the same thing. It’s just commonsense. However, despite an obvious solution to the problems plaguing our nation – the Senate has failed to pass a budget in over 1,120 days. Enough is enough. It is the obligation of Congress to pass a budget and it is shameful that some in this body would rather kick the can down the road than make the tough decisions.

Indeed. Every family in this nation DOES operate on a budget, and a family budget is EXACTLY THE SAME as the budget of a sovereign government. I mean, hasn’t YOUR family run a debt every year except for the year it was established? Doesn’t YOUR family mint its own currency and issue its own bonds? No? Oh because we do in my family! We have AWESOME BUCKS, and they come in denominations of $2 and $7. A $2 AWESOME BUCK has a picture of my dog’s butt on it. The $7 AWESOME BUCK looks just like the medal my brother won in the 2nd grade spelling bee.  Right now the rate of exchange is pretty steep: there are a million dollars Canadian in one AWESOME BUCK and they are legal tender in my living room, dining room, guest bathroom, and in some editions of Candyland.  Oh and currently the tax-equivalent yield on our bonds is running at around one thousandths of a percent right now, which we’re feeling pretty good about. Like all budgets, however, this one isn’t perfect, it took “compromise” which Republicans are totally known for.

No budget will be perfect.  It will require compromise, it will require hard work, and it will require putting partisan rhetoric aside so that we can move forward and find ways to implement a long-term solution to the fiscal challenges our nation faces. As one of 38 people to vote for the bipartisan Cooper-LaTourette budget, I will continue to come to the table and listen to any serious proposal. I would urge my colleagues in both chambers to do that same.

Yes! Let’s find ways to move forward and ruin Medicare for everyone, for ever! Let’s be clear: it’s what the Founders would have wanted. [TheHill]

 
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{ 71 comments }

CrunchyKnee May 25, 2012 at 9:12 am

Talking points moron has talking points.

Texan_Bulldog May 25, 2012 at 9:14 am

So do Republicans from IL think they have to be extra douche-y to make up for Barry being from there? (Looking at you too, Joe Walsh.)

fuflans May 25, 2012 at 1:35 pm

yes.

and to make up for the fact that cook county is so big and so blue they will ALWAYS suffer a significant inferiority complex.

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 9:15 am

Tourette budget? Fuck asshole cunt dick penis…

Sorry. Shit.

V572 Is this him? May 25, 2012 at 9:30 am

Goddamnit, I was going to make that fucking joke.

Mumbletypeg May 25, 2012 at 9:41 am

Tourette budget

Needz moar exclamation points, both of ya's. At least I'd always seen Tourette's portrayed as its sufferers "exclaiming!" or barking out their uncontrollably urged epithets.

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 10:02 am

Exclamation points this early in the morning hurt my head. SHIT! OUCH!

Goonemeritus May 25, 2012 at 9:15 am

The Republican Caucus has compromised plenty; after all didn’t they scrap their 2010 election commitment to hunt all remaining Democratic representatives down with dogs and torches?

ifthethunderdontgetya May 25, 2012 at 9:16 am

It will require compromise, it will require hard work, and it will require putting partisan rhetoric aside so that we can move forward and find ways…

To cut Social Security without being lynched by the olds.

And sadly, I'm sure there will be plenty of Democrats ready to go along after the elections.
~

EatsBabyDingos May 25, 2012 at 9:16 am

Obvious Kenyan Socialist, or he would have an American Flag pin on his lapel.

anniegetyerfun May 25, 2012 at 9:35 am

Also, failed to use code words like "personal responsibility." Obvious RINO.

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 9:17 am

Errr, acutally, technically, any family that owns a house with a mortgage is already bankrupt.

V572 Is this him? May 25, 2012 at 9:32 am

Got a car loan? Loser. Student loans? Pathetic financial weakling. Balance on your Unicard? Might as well report to Debtor's Prison in the morning.

sewollef May 25, 2012 at 10:34 am

Tomorrow morning? What the hell…?

Prevaricator…. get there right now!!

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 9:17 am

"compromise"

You keep using that word. I don't think it means what you think it means.

HippieEsq May 25, 2012 at 9:30 am

"I will continue to come to the table and listen to any serious proposal"

(LIAR)

Beowoof May 25, 2012 at 9:18 am

I think we should switch our currency to Disney Dollars. What else is more widely accepted World Wide. Crisis over.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 9:20 am

We can’t just raise taxes on millionaires and we can’t just cut spending and expect that everything will be fine.

…so I support a budget proposal that cuts spending on everything but the military and contains no tax increases.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 9:21 am

I know that no one in my family ever borrowed money ever.

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 9:23 am

Commie

chascates May 25, 2012 at 9:29 am

Would they be willing to lend some?

Studebaker Hawk May 25, 2012 at 9:23 am

Representative Dolt (fixed)

BaldarTFlagass May 25, 2012 at 9:23 am

"Every family in this nation operates on a budget."

I thought every family incurred heavy credit debt and lived way beyond their means, just like the government.

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 9:24 am

When did Ralph Malph dye his hair brown?

BaldarTFlagass May 25, 2012 at 9:25 am

"find bipartisan agreement amongst Independents, Republicans, and Democrats."

Wouldn't that be tri-partisan?

V572 Is this him? May 25, 2012 at 9:33 am

A three-way? Not with Republicans.

Baconzgood May 25, 2012 at 9:34 am

Who needs to count when you're talking about a budget?

littlebigdaddy May 25, 2012 at 9:25 am

Robert J. "Dill" Dold has some stupid stuff to say.

actor212 May 25, 2012 at 9:29 am

And he makes sure to thrust his point into our national intercourse.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 9:26 am

"We know that we need to rein in spending and we know that we need pro-growth tax reform. These are places that we can start to come together and find bipartisan agreement amongst Independents, Republicans, and Democrats."

Did David Broder teach a course in "How to write Political Essays for The Beltway"?

sullivanst May 25, 2012 at 9:32 am

Easiest. Course. Ever.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 9:37 am

Prerequisite: "How to write for an 8th Grade reading level."

HippieEsq May 25, 2012 at 9:26 am

Maybe this idiot should shoot for a Nobel Prize in Econ by studying the merit of debt-financing his personal family recession when the taint of failure grabs hold of his politcal career.

bureaucrap May 25, 2012 at 9:27 am

If this guy had "PlatitudeBucks" (TM), he'd be a millionaire.

chascates May 25, 2012 at 9:28 am

Compromise for the Right means agreeing completely with them.

C_R_Eature May 25, 2012 at 9:31 am

Whenever I hear Republicans saying these kinds of things I immediately think
"Translator Error".

Naked_Bunny May 25, 2012 at 11:00 am

The last decade shows that even doing that isn't sufficient.

DaSandman May 25, 2012 at 9:28 am

Just a run of the mill right wing terrorist dumbass. Are all the high end fart in the bathtub and snap at the bubbles right wing terrorists taking a long holiday weekend? They must all be up camping at Niggerhead for Memorial Day.

arihaya May 25, 2012 at 9:28 am

GOP compromise: "Hey, let's do it, Dems: I will give my sugar-daddy tax cuts and then you cut Medicare budget to off-set it ! Brilliant, right?"

slamtundra May 25, 2012 at 9:33 am

What is it with these bug guys and politics?

freakishlywrong May 25, 2012 at 9:35 am

I hate these assclowns.

V572 Is this him? May 25, 2012 at 9:37 am

Rep Dolt comes from IL-10, which includes North Shore lakefront suburbs such as Highland Park, Waukeegan, and Lake Forest, the richest municipality in the state. This demonstrates that the Riches are not necessarily smarter than the inheritance-challenged, non-bond-holding human beings that comprise the rest of the electorate.

Or perhaps it demonstrates that Riches prefer a congressman with no original ideas, thoughts, turns of phrase or other distinguishing characteristics; a dutiful stenographer who will vote to enact the Ryan budget agenda.

I'm going with the second hypothesis. It feels more sustainable.

deanbooth May 25, 2012 at 9:37 am

My family taxes my income at about 99%.

elburritodeluxe May 25, 2012 at 9:38 am

For instance: say your family decides to invade a neighbor, and then invade another neighbor. So you have two other households your family has to pacify and that's expensive.

And, say at the same time your family decides to pay for all of Grandpa's meds but not purchase them in a cheaper way, just pay full price.

And imagine your family does all this while Mom and Dad cut back on the number of hours they work, reducing the revenue coming into the household, because, it's just not right working all those hours!

That's the Republican way to run a family's finances!

elburritodeluxe May 25, 2012 at 12:30 pm

…well then maybe you have to cut back on doctors visits for the children, or as Republican families say, "chillern."

Stevola May 25, 2012 at 9:41 am

Illinois Republicans. I hate Illinois Republicans.

James Michael Curley May 25, 2012 at 9:42 am

"I will continue to come to the table and listen to any serious proposal drink your milkshake."

weejee May 25, 2012 at 9:48 am

Wuz Dold's great²grandpappy a fellah name of Uriah Heep?

MosesInvests May 25, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Ah, I though Dold seemed rather 'umble.

BarackMyWorld May 25, 2012 at 9:49 am

I love how in all Republican family budget metaphors, the family is never ever justified borrowing money to pay from things like health insurance or education like real families do.

not that Radio May 25, 2012 at 10:05 am

Nor do they ever seem to have secret torture prisons, like my family does.

Naked_Bunny May 25, 2012 at 10:57 am

Churches aren't secret.

not that Radio May 25, 2012 at 10:05 am

He forgot to mention "twirling toward freedom"

BarackMyWorld May 25, 2012 at 10:06 am

The only thing missing from most "pro-growth tax reform" proposals is the part where the tax reform actually goes towards growth.

DahBoner May 25, 2012 at 10:09 am

That's odd! These same people didn't seem the least bit concerned when Bush turned the surplus into a deficit.

Hmmmm….

Doktor StrangeZoom May 25, 2012 at 10:13 am

Because Freedom.

Exhausted66 May 25, 2012 at 12:18 pm

9/11 changed everything!

FNMA May 25, 2012 at 1:14 pm

Wait a minute! There was another president before the black guy?

OneYieldRegular May 25, 2012 at 10:19 am

A bill with a picture of a dog's butt on it would still look magnitudes better than the ugliness that passes for U.S. currency now.

Biff May 25, 2012 at 10:33 am

USAmerica should just borrow money from it's parents. Problem solved.

Naked_Bunny May 25, 2012 at 10:51 am

Sure, cut spending, lower taxes, re-privatize healthcare coverage. Funny how we only adopt the policies of European countries when those policies are failing.

barto May 25, 2012 at 11:33 am

I think he means spurn the economy

biblioteq_tress May 25, 2012 at 11:41 am

For fucks sake.

OT but not really: I work for a a federal agency that provides disability and unemployment payments to a largely blue collar workforce. Like Social Security, this is a social insurance program that is supported by its own beneficiaries and potential annuitants. It mostly runs in the black, and has little income from the general funds.

If the Ryan budget had passed, this agency would have been abolished. Why? Because, um, well, no one knows. Because we don't want to have the working class suffer the indignity of collecting an insurance policy they have paid into?

a_pink_poodle May 25, 2012 at 3:14 pm

I always spend over half my income on defense spending too.

By defense spending I mean booze and porn.

Nawww I'm kidding, just booze.

Wonderthing May 25, 2012 at 3:34 pm

I like what someone said once and I can't remember who or what exactly it was so I'm paraphrasing because shut up: The poor in this country will never get together to defeat the greedheads because they see themselves not as poor but as temporarily embarrassed millionaires.

didgen May 25, 2012 at 4:32 pm

When I print the money for my family I put cat hair into all denominations, and dog hair into the special edition cash. It makes it much harder to counterfeit.

Negropolis May 25, 2012 at 11:40 pm

OT: What happened to the staff?

V572 Barb May 26, 2012 at 11:41 am

This is awfully good:

Distinguished gym teacher, legislator, war hero and bribe solicitor Randall ("Duke") Cunningham is about to be released to a halfway house and humbly requests that the judge restore his 2nd Amendment rights. How could a man this illiterate be elected to Congress? Ask the voters of CA-51.

ttommyunger May 26, 2012 at 11:47 pm

Funny, I googled "Derp" and the same pix came up, go figure.

not that Radio May 25, 2012 at 10:02 am

He probably says "common sense" when talking about particle spin interactions and electron degeneracy pressure. It's just common sense.

biblioteq_tress May 25, 2012 at 10:56 am

Seriously, can I take that quote and put it on a bumpersticker at Cafepress? If I can make it work will happily donate any proceeds to any cause or upcoming races of your choice.

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