NAME RANK AND SERIAL NUMBER  10:10 am May 23, 2012

Nation Weeps As ‘Obama Not An American’ Rep. Mike Coffman Releases Tragic Hostage Video

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

No negotiating with terroristsListen, Denver 9 News reporter Kyle Clark, Rep. Mike Coffman stands by his statement that he misspoke and he apologizes. What about that statement do you not get? That he misspoke? Or that he apologizes? Let him clear it up for you. He stands by his statement that he misspoke and he apologizes. Want him to turn it up? HE STANDS BY HIS STATEMENT THAT HE MISSPOKE. AND HE APOLOGIZES. Watch Rep. Mike Coffman shit himself on camera in this tragic hostage video, after the jump!

“I don’t know whether Barack Obama was born in the United States of America. I don’t know that,” Coffman told donors. “But I do know this, that in his heart, he’s not an American. He’s just not an American.”

Informed that the comments were recorded, the Coffman campaign issued a written statement.

“I misspoke and I apologize. I have confidence in President Obama’s citizenship and legitimacy as President of the United States,” the statement read. “I don’t believe the President shares my belief in American Exceptionalism. His policies reflect a philosophy that America is but one nation among many equals,” the statement read. “As a Marine, I believe America is unique and based on a core set of principles that make it superior to other nations.”

Got it, so Barack Obama is totally American except in his heart. Good misspokenness. Good apology! Rep. Mike Coffman is going places, like maybe back to the factory for a reset.

[Denver9News]

 
Related video

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 153 comments }

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:15 am

In fairness, his heart was obtained in the Wayback machine from the Saracens in Jersualem during the Crusades.

sewollef May 23, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I think his heart was probably bought at WalMart…. in the bargain bins.

Which means he's a living, breathing, full-on Maoist with a fake copy of a real person's heart.

I buy a ten-pack for $20 on Canal Street and sell them on eBays. Make a huge profit from those douchebags downtown.

Barb May 23, 2012 at 10:15 am

The Secretary of State for Arizona got his answer from Hawaii for his request for an official birth certificate. I can't wait to hear if he uses the same "I misspoke and I apologize" answer in his announcement today or if he will give a full throated endorsement of Obama's American citizenship.

NorthStarSpanx May 23, 2012 at 10:20 am

I'd rather my son feel America is just one nation among equals than be a sociopath.
http://azdailysun.com/news/state-and-regional/art

starfanglednut May 23, 2012 at 11:37 am

"choked many of the boys until they passed out as a game."

WTF???!!!

doloras May 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

David Carradine and Michael Hutchence, you are avenged.

ChapterUndVerse May 27, 2012 at 11:18 am

Someone needs a spanking and a lecture on how the expression "broomstick up your ass" is a metaphor, not an actual way to create more Republicanz.

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:23 am

I wonder when the AZ Sec of State will issue his statement as to whether Romney is, in fact, a unicorn.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:26 am

Oh, man, that is such unicorn libel!!!!

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:40 am

MittRomneyIsAUnicorn.com

Mahousu May 23, 2012 at 11:00 am

Unicorns are people too, my friend … Nope.
I enjoy firing unicorns … Nope.
I should tell my story, I'm also an unemployed unicorn … Nope.

Jeez, Romney memes are so lame, they even make unicorns look bad.

starfanglednut May 23, 2012 at 11:38 am

Unicorns are MUCH hornier than Romney!

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:38 am

Dick Cheney has made unicorns an endangered species.

Schmannnity May 23, 2012 at 10:15 am

Everyone who does not agree with me is not a true American.

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

That's the gist of the GOP mindset in a single sentence.

starfanglednut May 23, 2012 at 11:38 am

Concise. Simple.

sewollef May 23, 2012 at 1:34 pm

"Uh oh, I'm in the shitter now…", Newt.

ChilLysol May 23, 2012 at 10:16 am

This is obviously all Barry's fault. If hadn't gone around the globe apologizing for America's shortcomings, Mike Coffman would've never been forced to say this.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:50 am

Clearly, Obama should resign in disgrace.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:02 am

Why haven't they started the impeachment proceedings?!!!

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:07 pm

Because they are afraid of Hillary. She killed Vince Foster, you know.

LetUsBray May 23, 2012 at 10:16 am

Venn Mike Coffman says, Vee is der Master Race…

swordfis May 23, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Ve'll – "Heil!" [Bronx cheer] – –"Heil!" [Bronx cheer]— right in der Fuehrer's face

ChurchofRealism May 23, 2012 at 10:16 am

If Mike Coffman were a rock album, he would be called Smell the Derp.

BaldarTFlagass May 23, 2012 at 10:25 am

Or the White Album.

ChilLysol May 23, 2012 at 10:36 am

He'd be a Nickelback album of Kings of Leon covers.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:45 am

As interpreted by Creed.

ChilLysol May 23, 2012 at 10:47 am

And produced by Bob Rock.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:51 am

Liner notes by Hootie and the Blowfish

starfanglednut May 23, 2012 at 11:41 am

Nickleback is teh fucking worst. When I went on Facebook and saw that my annoying sister in law likes them, I laughed for like half an hour.

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 10:48 am

"Sniff The Glove" seems more fitting, doesn't it?

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:07 pm

Sniff The Butt.

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 10:17 am

Jesus loves the little children, all the little children of the world, but MOST especially the White American ones, because they are the best, Semper Fi.

Cognitive motherfucking dissonance.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:17 am

FREE MIKE COFFMAN!

(except Fridays, Saturdays and any weekday after 5)

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 10:18 am

When will Barack Obama apologize for these toxic political remarks?

EatsBabyDingos May 23, 2012 at 10:19 am

I don't know if Mike Coffman was born. Unless I see pictures of him coming out of his mother's hoo ha, I will assume he was hatched.

starfanglednut May 23, 2012 at 11:42 am

Motherfucker came straight off a wingnut assembly line.

sewollef May 23, 2012 at 1:37 pm

You can have 'em in any colour as long as it's white.

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:09 pm

I've seen those pictures. They were taken in Wingnuttistan.

Not_So_Much May 23, 2012 at 10:20 am

Can Mike Coffman's jittery mouth unfuck the assfucking that his own words fucked himself with? Also?

Serolf_Divad May 23, 2012 at 10:20 am

I love it that patriotism has basically been reduced to a variation on "my dad could beat up your dad."

MrFizzy May 23, 2012 at 10:20 am

Semper Fi, eh, motherfucker? Here's a news flash – just because you were a Marine 35 years ago doesn't give you a license to run around slandering other people.

thatsitfortheother1 May 23, 2012 at 10:47 am

Most (not all) veterans have the good sense not to slime the commander in chief of the active duty guys.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:06 am

Hey, I'm a retired Marine but I don't try to use it as license to spout nonsense.

It does, however, help with the occasional traffic stop.

MrFizzy May 23, 2012 at 11:29 am

Yeah, exactly, integrity is supposed to be baked in – I was not a Marine (Navy), but I doubt the credo includes lying, even when it suits your needs. Now the traffic stop thing is excellent.

BaldarTFlagass May 23, 2012 at 10:21 am

"I believe America is unique and based on a core set of principles that make it superior to other nations"

Fuck you, asshole.

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:24 am

It's a wonder that the Brits and Canadians, let alone any other countries, even talk to us.

Skullfry Buddha May 23, 2012 at 10:35 am

Mostly cuz we're the bully who coincidentally has lots of money

Chichikovovich May 23, 2012 at 10:38 am

We've learned to just filter it out – rather as you might regard a Tourette's victim who randomly tossed out uninformed jingoism rather than profanity. I remember as a little kid reading an Archie comic where one of the characters said to the other something like "This is the only free country in the world", or something like that. And even at that age – maybe 8 or 9, I was aware that Canada had elections and free press and all that stuff. I remember thinking "How did those morons get to be so ignorant?"

Multiply that by about 10,000 more experiences of that type, and you have the foreigners attitude toward standard American mindless patriotism.

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:43 am

To be fair, we have to listen to Canadians go on about their hockey and beer.

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 10:51 am

and Michael Buble, don't forget we listen to him, too.

Jus_Wonderin May 23, 2012 at 10:41 am

We are so superior to them, we wouldn't even take their calls. We would stand there to check the caller ID as the call goes to our voice mail.

freakishlywrong May 23, 2012 at 10:33 am

Yes. Indeed. Being up to our armpits in bomb-throwing right wing, religious, ignorant fascists makes us truly superior.

V572 Is this him? May 23, 2012 at 10:45 am

And can we pu-leez stop talking about "The Free World"? What other worlds are there? Why are they not free? Yes, we know Mitt still thinks its 1957 and the Soviets are orbiting bomb-filled Sputniks overhead, but the rest of us have moved on.

BerkeleyBear May 23, 2012 at 10:48 am

North Korean Worker's Paradise libel!

thatsitfortheother1 May 23, 2012 at 10:49 am

superior to other nations…

It probably was, during that short time it took the French to catch up.

BerkeleyBear May 23, 2012 at 10:52 am

I know America is not unique and is based on a core set of principles that it borrowed liberally from the thinkers and traditions of other nations, with a healthy respect for those traditions and the belief that every subsequent generation can improve on the past but never achieve perfection.

Fixed it for him to include some truth. Fuckers who don't know our Founding Fathers were self proclaimed midgets standing on the shoulders of the predecessors don't deserve to have their words treated with respect.

Joshua Norton May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

I get the distinct feeling that "American Exceptionalism" has become the new dog whistle for White Supremacy.

I wonder why that is…..

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:40 am

I highly recommend the excellent book "The Limits of Power: The End of American Exceptionalism" (American Empire Project) by Andrew Bacevich.

Any book by Col. Bacevich is well worth reading!

jodyleek May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

American Exceptionalism? And by that you mean, in the US America there is an exceptional number of mouth-breathing troglodytes who hate the government, but who campaign extensively to collect checks and benefits from the government. Is that right?

EatsBabyDingos May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

Maybe Mike needs to be on a pinata like Nikki Haley

Mittens Howell, III May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

Now let's hear what Corey Booker has to say In Coffman's defense.

NorthStarSpanx May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

He believes in America Exceptionalism the way Catherine Scalia thinks she's Pamela Anderson sexy.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:25 am

At least Scalia serves the occasional hot dog in her buns

deanbooth May 23, 2012 at 10:22 am

We still don't know what Cheney is, in his heart. Probably Messican.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:10 am

Isn't Cheney like 6th cousin to Obummerz? In fact, I think Barry learned to toss a football at the family reunions playing catch with Cheney's heart.

BaldarTFlagass May 23, 2012 at 10:23 am

Actually, he's right. Obama is not from America. He's from Alpha Centauri. Just like Mittens.

thatsitfortheother1 May 23, 2012 at 10:51 am

Alpheratz.

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Except Bams has HUGE Space Balls.

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 10:26 am

Didn't American Exceptionalism come about because we wanted an excuse to murder all the Indians and Mexicans who had already staked claims out west?

Look for the GOP's 2016 campaign platform: White Man's Burden.

V572 Is this him? May 23, 2012 at 10:48 am

It goes well with our current enthusiasm for social Darwinism. All those Unemployeds are just part of the herd being thinned, and the social safety net slows down the inevitable process.

thatsitfortheother1 May 23, 2012 at 10:53 am

That was Manifest Destiny. American Exceptionalism came about because we wanted to wipe our ass on everybody else.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:12 am

Thank Jeebus that there weren't any "Stand Your Ground" laws back then.

Mumbly_Libel May 23, 2012 at 11:24 am

American Exceptionalism means one of two things. Its original meaning, as I've understood it, was the suggestion that America was uniquely situated, economically, socially, and culturally, to be the crucible for modern Representative Democracy. A lot of the factors De Toqueville pointed to were probably egregiously wrong, but it wasn't an especially odious thesis.

Of late, it's been used to say that because America is automatically and innately Morally Right, possibly because Jeebus wrote the Constitution and Declaration of Independence, therefore America is always right and nothing America does could ever possibly be wrong, including things that violate America's own laws, and that there's similarly an imperative to impose the values that America doesn't live up to on the rest of the world, by force. It's basically many of the creepiest precepts of Dominionism, just super-sized to the national/international level.

Anyway, when Republicans talk Exceptionalism, they usually mean the latter version.

SorosBot May 23, 2012 at 10:26 am

And I believe that anyone who believes in the insidious philosophy of American Exceptionalism is in their heart not a real American, but a fascist who hates the Constitution.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:13 am

They are also clearly oblivious to the better qualities of other nations – say like math and science scores, health care delivery systems, and social safety nets.

BarackMyWorld May 23, 2012 at 10:26 am

He did misspeak. Obviously what he meant to say was "Nigger nigger nigger nigger nigger nigger."

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 10:52 am

"Blah blah blah"

BerkeleyBear May 23, 2012 at 10:54 am

I will know have that on loop to the tune of LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" (wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle) all day. Only voiced by the 6 year olds I hear reciting the lyrics to that song at the park.

Gratuitous World May 23, 2012 at 10:27 am

as a marine, he clearly believes in blahblahblah (but not chain-of-command)

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:31 am

Chain of what, now?

Terry May 23, 2012 at 10:45 am

Sing it, Aretha!
http://youtu.be/8Lx52sBLtKI

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:52 am

One of the best moments in recent movie history was John Travolta dancing to that in a dive bar in Michael. Outstanding choice.

thatsitfortheother1 May 23, 2012 at 10:54 am

sometimes fidelis

SheriffRoscoe May 23, 2012 at 10:27 am

Wingnuttery means never having to say you're sorry.

weejee May 23, 2012 at 10:31 am

Regardless of what a sorry sack you really are.

StarsUponThars May 23, 2012 at 10:29 am

DEFEND FREEDOM
<my freedom, not yours>
LOWER TAXES
<except for poor fuckers>
LESS GOVERNMENT
<except for gays who want to marry>

MarionNYNY May 23, 2012 at 10:56 am

<and except for people who want family planning, or to use medical marijuana>

MoeDeLawn May 23, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Please leave out the "medical" part. It make me feel like a (stoned) hypocrite.

BaldarTFlagass May 23, 2012 at 10:30 am

It's a special Republican ability, being able to look into someone's heart and knowing what they are all about. George W Bush did it, too, with Vladimir Putin. It's a super-power, like those comic book characters have.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:31 am

Pooty-poot!

Whereas Putin merely had to look at the blank stare of Bush to know he could roll him on just about any issue he wanted to.

BerkeleyBear May 23, 2012 at 10:55 am

As long as he was wearing a cross of a faith he doesn't have, which apparently was enough of a shiny object that Bush's penetrating gaze never went deeper.

weejee May 23, 2012 at 10:31 am

 

Mumbletypeg May 23, 2012 at 10:32 am

I approve this dope walking back his statement as long as the walking is truly, and backwardly, taking place off the end of a plank into crocodile-infested swamp muck.

Joshua Norton May 23, 2012 at 10:34 am

What he really said was "Barack Obama is the greatest president ever". But unfortunately his white hood muffled the words.

Mittens Howell, III May 23, 2012 at 10:36 am

"I am Miss Poke, and I apologize"

Spoken like a true lady.

Jus_Wonderin May 23, 2012 at 10:36 am

Statement: I will not watch any videos on Wonket today. As my deadlines loom and my blood pressure is up. I don't want to blow out my aorta.

el_donaldo May 23, 2012 at 10:36 am

Yes, we are unique. In that the rest of the world is laughing at us because we and we alone elect and consent to be governed by asshats like you, Congressman Coffman.

freakishlywrong May 23, 2012 at 10:37 am

Why isn't Mittens being asked to "refudiate" this shit daily? The Obama team, (all of them), had to apologize again and again for Hilary Rosen saying something true.

proudgrampa May 23, 2012 at 10:38 am

I continue to be stunned, and I know that I shouldn't be, at the racist hatred and disrespect directed at our president.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:18 am

Well, if only he wasn't a muslin Kenyan soshulist commie Pretender-in-Chief who is destroying America as we know it, they might cut him some slack.

But then again, he is married to that blah woman who is trying to take away our fries and chips. …

SorosBot May 23, 2012 at 10:38 am

Another thing that makes no sense is how he says "As a Marine, I believe…" when what follows has jack shit to do with being a Marine. Besides that it's a lie, since it appears he's a former Marine, it's completely irrelevant. But a lot of [former] Marines talk like that – as if somehow being in the Marines gives them some special insight into patriotism when it doesn't. I don't give a shit that this guy was in the Marines, nor should anybody.

Yet it's common with them. Does basic training for Marines include brainwashing to believe that they somehow magically are better Americans than everyone else?

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:44 am

Semper Fi, dude. They take that motto seriously. Once a GIrine, always a GIrine.

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:16 pm

Except when they bad mouth the (blah) CinC.

V572 Is this him? May 23, 2012 at 10:51 am

Yes.

BerkeleyBear May 23, 2012 at 10:58 am

Fuck yes. A childhood friend became a Marine around the time of the First Gulf War, and I wound up seeing his boot camp yearbook (an official Marine publication). Egads, what a load of swill they put out, much of which 18 and 19 year olds swallow whole heartedly. Now, many of them either ignore it or get better, but plenty never do.

Jus_Wonderin May 23, 2012 at 11:01 am

When I had a company (3 partners) we hired one of the company friends as CEO. He was a marine and made sure everyone knew it every fucking second of the day. Also, he was a racist. A hard core conservative. An individual who ran up debt then took bankrupsty. And laughed at the fuckin' ignorant Florida voters that couldn't figure out how to vote in 2000.

Yeah, we were sooo lucky to have him before the company failed. I am not bitter. Just stupid.

Chichikovovich May 23, 2012 at 11:07 am

Well I hope that you at least paid him a huge bonus just before the company went under. That's the American way.

Terry May 23, 2012 at 11:45 am

" I don't give a shit that this guy was in the Marines, nor should anybody. "

I know a few Marines who would be p.o.'d that he was making them all look bad.

Negropolis May 24, 2012 at 3:19 am

I agree with that save for the part that there are, indeed, professions in which once you've been in them, you are part of that family, for life. I don't mind former Marines calling themselves Marines. There is no such thing as an ex-Marine or ex-president etc…

Skullfry Buddha May 23, 2012 at 10:38 am

Vladimir Putin…Christ, what a enormous cringe-making embarrassment that was. The minute Bush said he "looked into his soul" the world pissed itself laughing.

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Bush should have known better. After all, he had experience with the soulless.

ShreditorsDesk May 23, 2012 at 10:40 am

Some machines don't get a 'reset'. They get recalled.

elburritodeluxe May 23, 2012 at 10:41 am

Nobama am still an Islamic though!

CapeClod May 23, 2012 at 10:41 am

It is quite exceptional that his opinions change when told that his remarks have been filmed for a wider audience.

Mumbly_Libel May 23, 2012 at 10:41 am

What a douchebag.

I'm sorry, I misspoke. I mean to say, what a fucking shit-for-brains douchebag.

Mittens Howell, III May 23, 2012 at 10:42 am

I do not know whether Mitt Romney was born in America or assembled in a Chinese factory. But I do know this, that in his circuitry, he’s not a human. He’s just not a human.

actor212 May 23, 2012 at 10:47 am

Manchurian Candibot 2.0

Indeed, his real name is "Meeps," we just misheard him.

Oblios_Cap May 23, 2012 at 10:55 am

Meeps is people, too, my friend!

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 12:23 pm

But he's got the "Derp" app running.

Texan_Bulldog May 23, 2012 at 10:42 am

That hostage video was even better than Booker's.

Baconzgood May 23, 2012 at 10:50 am
ifthethunderdontgetya May 23, 2012 at 11:00 am

Classic.

Mr. Lizard! A monster! Would you care for a HAMBURGAR?
~

Mumbletypeg May 23, 2012 at 10:52 am

Dear me! (O/T). CSM has a game called "Gaffe Dodger: A Presidential Election Game" and it is cracking me up, just the sound effects alone [/LOLgasm]

Apologies if anyone has mentioned this nifty game already. It seems perfect for wonkette minded's to fill some idle time; & I'm normally not into 'games but I'm all over this.

Beetagger May 23, 2012 at 10:52 am

In my heart, I know this guy is a shitsack.

larrykat May 23, 2012 at 10:58 am

"Is there any question I can ask you that you'll answer in a different way?" That was classic. Good on that reporter.

Manhattan123 May 23, 2012 at 11:10 am

Mitt Romney can stop the VP search now. This clown would get every lardass teabagger and their brother (not to mention every yokel Southerner and their cousin – who they no doubt married) out to enthusiastically vote in November.

SideshowSlob May 23, 2012 at 11:13 am

always knew he was a scotsman

Native_of_SL_UT May 23, 2012 at 11:18 am

Looking at the still picture of Coffman in the video, it appears to me that Coffman has had an implant put on his forehead. I'm sure it was to hide his neanderthal looking skull.

johnnyzhivago May 23, 2012 at 11:26 am

It would take a Marine to be able to evaluate the relative rankings of every country on the planet and figure out which are the best and worst.

DahBoner May 23, 2012 at 12:42 pm

True.

Marines are noted for being the most intellectual branch of the military.

Well, behind the Air Force, Navy and the Army…

johnnyzhivago May 23, 2012 at 11:27 am

By almost every measure the US has become an exceptional nation again – it's close to dead last in just about every important category.

SayItWithWookies May 23, 2012 at 11:30 am

Hey, it's the essence of American exceptionalism to hold the radical idea that everybody should be treated equally — that's why we should be above the law. Now wait a minute — I know those two ideas go together somehow…

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:35 am

Dude held his position about as long as (r)Money supported letting gay couples adopt children.

Native_of_SL_UT May 23, 2012 at 11:38 am

Why is it that those same people hollering about American exceptionalism are the same people who tell us our government sucks ass?

Geminisunmars May 23, 2012 at 12:16 pm

As a Denverite, I have been watching Kyle Clark for a while now, and admiring his attempts at being an actual journalist, as much as KUSA will allow him. Can I take this as a sign that real journalism might be returning to our news departments? Nah, he'll probably be looking for a new job in a day or two.

owhatever May 23, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Coffman does not care. He intentionally blew the birther dog whistle for his rightwing base, then "apologized" when the librul media said he did so. He's a Marine, so he will rip Obama's head off and piss in the skull, and his teabaggers will applaud. Oh, by the way, he was a lawyer in the Marines.

DahBoner May 23, 2012 at 12:44 pm

He was such a skilled lawyer, he couldn't get a job anywhere else but the Marines?

niblick77 May 23, 2012 at 12:27 pm

Did he do his 20 and retire a Marine? If not I have no respect for him.

DahBoner May 23, 2012 at 12:38 pm

PSSST!!! HAVE YOU NOTICED HE'S BLACK???

BZ1 May 23, 2012 at 2:20 pm

"in his heart, he’s not an American" is there projection going on here??

lulzmonger May 23, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Tragic Hostage Video

NEEDS MOAR PATTY HEARST.

Oh, Amerika's sure thirty-nine flavours of fuckin' exceptional, alright.

Never been another nation in history to have such epic strategic & economic advantages handed to it on a platter literally right from Day One … virtually all of which are by now pissed away, in exchange for the geopolitical equivalent of hookers & blow.

USA! USA! USA!

Nostrildamus May 23, 2012 at 3:48 pm

“But I do know this, that in his heart, he’s not an American. He’s just not an American.”

“As a Marine, I believe America is unique and based on a core set of principles that make it superior to other nations.”

Is one of those core principles disloyalty to the president by a member of the armed forces is treason?

Tommy1733 May 23, 2012 at 4:43 pm

What a beautiful mind.

ttommyunger May 24, 2012 at 8:00 am

Not simply a little cunt- a cowardly little cunt.

Manhattan123 May 24, 2012 at 1:42 pm

If Colorado is trying to outcrazy Arizona they've got a long way to go, but this guy is singlehandedly putting them in the running.

ChapterUndVerse May 27, 2012 at 11:39 am

"I believe America is unique and based on a core set of principles that make it superior to other nations.” Despite inheriting its citizens from said other nations, its legal principles from Magna Carta and English law as codified by Edward Coke.

Actually, the "core set of principles" that remained consistent from the founding until now is snake oil salesmanship and theft from the natives. Even the frickin' national bird is a bully and a thief, among its kind.

The last nation founded on these principles was Sparta.

ChilLysol May 23, 2012 at 10:56 am

Cover art by Ed Hardy.

chicken_thief May 23, 2012 at 11:04 am

Or Jon McNaughton.

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 11:53 am

And that twat-rag Celine.

Lascauxcaveman May 23, 2012 at 12:14 pm

Mike Huckabee on bass, Joe Barton on Drums.

sewollef May 23, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Michele Bachmann-Turner on vocals.

Negropolis May 24, 2012 at 3:16 am

And Shania Twain and Justine Beaver and Nickleback and…there is a lot.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: