IN THE SEXUAL WAY MOSTLY  9:00 pm May 22, 2012

Wingnuts Confused Over How To Be Angry About New DC Comics Gay Superhero

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Takes one to know one.

Some horrified wingnuts have been distressed over the announcement that DC Comics will “turn” one of its major legacy superheroes gay in June, and weirdly those wingnuts don’t include vile hate lizard Bryan Fischer. After all, at last someone is recognizing what Bryan Fischer’s many arduous years relentlessly studying gay men taught him long ago: that a muscle-bound man who runs around in tights must be a very naughty pervert indeed. Vindication. So really, what is the big hairy-chested deal here, angry conservatives? Let us turn to the tense worrywarts of the Weekly Standard for what is one rather novel argument adrift in the sea of outrage, here it is: We ought to feel disgusted because DC Comics is using gays for, get this, marketing purposes. GAYSPLOITATION.

Standard opinionator Jonathan V. Last hates to bother you with this inconvenient saga, but your beloved elitist DC Comics has not been doing very well financially these last few years.

For people who don’t follow these things (read: normal, well-adjusted adults) Dan DiDio took over DC Comics in 2006 and drove the company into disarray. Sales were down. The company’s flagship characters were in books nobody bought. With the exception of Christopher Nolan’s Batman franchise, none of the DC characters were successfully being brought to movie screens—which is, at this point, the primary business mission for comic book publishers.

After six years of DiDio’s management, the company believed that it was so creatively bankrupt that it had to cancel every single title it owned. And then re-imagine—and re-launch—the entire brand. Imagine New Coke, if Coke was the only product the Coca-Cola company owned in 1985.

So guess what: now they want some of those big homosexual bucks everybody keeps talking about, sellouts.

Comic book nerds were pretty worked up about all of this, but the mainstream press was thrilled. They don’t normally pay much attention to comics, but DiDio got places like the New York Times to smile upon DC because he promised that, as part of the re-imagining, DC was going to the diversity woodshed. The New DC would have more minorities. And homosexuals. And drunks. And drunk, minority, homosexuals. (I’m kidding—but only about the alcoholism.) The Times, and other organs of polite society who otherwise couldn’t care less about comic books, loved it.

Ha ha, the stupid media has fallen prey to such an easy trap, suckers. Who reports a narrative like “a struggling business changes its strategy to widen its demographic appeal and attract some publicity” when “gays shamelessly exploited for homosexual bucks” is the actual story here?

But really, who cares? The New DC is already a creative failure. It looks like it’s going to wind up a business failure, too. And as a piece of social activism? This morning Marvel announced that their big homosexual character, Northstar, will get gay married—interracially gay married!—in June’s issue of Astonishing X-Men. So even in the contest for transparently commercial attempts at cultural relevance, DC is a already loser, too.

So there you go. You may now feel smugly secure that DC Comics has failed at capitalism, for being too slow to embrace the homos. That is such a fun argument for a conservative magazine to make! [Twitter/ Weekly Standard]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 270 comments }

Barb May 22, 2012 at 9:02 pm

Gay superhero? Why would they have to turn gay? They can toast bread with laser beams that shoot from their eyes. They don't need the small appliances that comes with gay induction.

tessiee May 22, 2012 at 10:58 pm

"They don't need the small appliances that comes with gay induction."

OR that you get for wedding presents.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:29 am

I didn't get no small appliances.

I'VE BEEN HAD!!!

smokefilledroommate May 22, 2012 at 9:06 pm

I thought the gay one was Robin the 'Boy Wonder'.

shortsandpants May 22, 2012 at 9:26 pm

For sure he is! He never has a girl to save, he wears pastel colors, he's always following around a bigger man, and he refuses to drive his own car. The gay-dar is reading off the charts with that one.

Beowoof May 22, 2012 at 10:10 pm

The cub to Batman's bear.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:31 am

Now that you mention it …

Negropolis May 22, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Come on, everyone knew Bruce Wayne was gay. A confirmed bachelor with commitment issues who dresses up in tight leather and a fancy belt every night, who enjoys "fighting crime" with his partner? Really, this is a surprise, how?

Barb May 22, 2012 at 9:13 pm

He does keep a teen boy in a cave. Hmm………….

JudasPeckerwood May 22, 2012 at 9:26 pm

So you're saying that Batman is about to come out as a family-values Republican?

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Bruce Wayne: Job Creator

Negropolis May 22, 2012 at 9:30 pm

I can see him, now, railing against paying higher taxes on millionaires, because it's going to go to the corrupt Gotham City police department.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:34 pm

The Gotham City Weakly Standard will be writing editorials condemning the corrupt, unionized police force and the idea of single payer police protection and lauding the private sector efforts of Batman and Robin, who aren't limited by burdensome regulations and that whole "due process of law" thing.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:24 pm

Does he enjoy hambiscuits too?

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:25 pm

Don't forget, Batman also accessorizes fabulously.

miss_grundy May 22, 2012 at 9:32 pm

I can't wait for someone to ask Christian Bale about it. Do you think he'll take it well or will he go into a tirade?

rickmaci May 22, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Lives with an older man who cares for his every need. Oh, and the Bat Cave is spotless!!

George Spelvin May 22, 2012 at 10:30 pm

And fabulous!

Swampgas_Man May 23, 2012 at 6:31 am

That's Alfred's doing.

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 9:52 am

Alfred's gay, too?! It's true, then, the gay is contagious!

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Personally, I always thought that Robin and Alfred were getting a lil' sumthin sumthin on the side.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Well, duh, buttler!

PsycWench May 22, 2012 at 10:22 pm
Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:30 pm

Thank you, that was simply hilarious. Written by Stephen Colbert!

PsycWench May 23, 2012 at 12:44 pm

Yeah, that one is priceless. But I can only share it with select friends and colleagues.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:53 pm

I, labouring under no such disadvantage, will try to share it with the whole WORLD ASAP. The joys of a nom-de-Net! Om, nom, nom!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:32 am

Boston marriage.

Mumbly_Libel May 23, 2012 at 7:49 am

Fun bit of actual comic books trivia: Batwoman was originally introduced as a love interest for Batman, specifically to blunt this exact critique, and retired in the 60's because there wasn't much else to do with her. She was then re-introduced during the most recent previous efforts to diversify the DC universe, in the mid-2000s, as a lesbian and also too jewish.

She's romantically involved with Renee Montoya (a character first introduced in the good animated series) who is a former Gotham City Detective, and currently fights crime as the new The Question (formerly a deprecated Ditko hero who partially influenced Watchmen's Rorschach).

Sharkey May 22, 2012 at 9:11 pm

And drunk, minority, homosexuals. (I’m kidding—but only about the alcoholism.)

Hey now, we don't kid about alcoholism on this website!

radio-of-owls May 22, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Well, sometimes *hic* we do. *hic*

Buckminster May 22, 2012 at 11:20 pm

Who's kidding? We're alcoholics unanimous on this website, amirite?

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:42 am

Fuck yeah. Rehab is for quitters.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:34 am

We're past the kidding stage, fo sho.

Callyson May 23, 2012 at 12:48 am

Seriously. And we are not "drunks": we are connoisseurs of fine wines and spirits.

Weekly Standard readers and writers, on the other hand, must be a bunch of drunks to fall for this crap…

Boojum May 23, 2012 at 6:27 am

No, really, drunks.

mavenmaven May 22, 2012 at 9:12 pm

It's Chicken Hawkman, of course.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Who is secretly mild-mannered conservative columnist Jonah Goldberg.

ifthethunderdontgetya May 22, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Goldberg is Bouncing Boy.
~

vulpes82 May 22, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Matter-Eating Lad.

ChuckieJesus May 23, 2012 at 7:45 am

The sheer nerdery/snark makes me regret I have but one upfist to give.
\

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 1:44 am

Translated into gay slang this joke is disgusting.

I approve.

mavenmaven May 23, 2012 at 4:48 am

That was the intent. His next guest issue revolves around his pairing up with the Cougar.

gullywompr May 22, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Any guy that can bag Wonder Woman, Catwoman, Batwoman, Poison Ivy, Sasha Bordeaux, Black Canary, and Jezebel Jet (just to name a few), is doing something right.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:27 pm

Beards, they're all beards.

Mumbly_Libel May 23, 2012 at 8:15 am

So much. Especially Batwoman, both in-canon (she's not actually into dudes) and out-of-canon (she was introduced as a love interest because Seduction of the Innocent called Batman, and I'm paraphrasing here, "super-gay")

Sharkey May 22, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Adam West approves. Case closed.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:59 am

Allen West approves too. But on the DL.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:59 am

Does he send your gaydar shrieking into submission too, hon? 'Cause that boy just ain't right.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:13 pm

DC needs to bring back sapphic, BDSM Wonder Woman with lots of scenes of Wonder Woman tying other women up, Wonder Woman spanking other women, other women tying Wonder Woman up, Wonder Woman being spanked by other women, etc, etc, etc. You know, like she was originally written by her creator, William Moulton Marston.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 9:19 pm
Beowoof May 22, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Why for the first time since I was 11, comics are interesting again.

Biel_ze_Bubba May 23, 2012 at 7:43 am

And not just bondage! Old man Marston was a kinky one, no question.

If Lynda Carter had stuck with the original intent, we'd still be watching today.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 9:14 pm

I hear Archie is going to divorce Veronica and gay-marry Moose.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Pfft…Moose would split Archie in half.

Beowoof May 22, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Moose is the bottom.

tessiee May 22, 2012 at 11:04 pm

Believe it or not, the Archie series already has a gay married couple:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/how-archies-gay-frien

If you notice the picture that goes with this article, they're also a gay, interracial, married couple.

My favorite line from the article: "When Archie is too progressive for you, that's how science identifies you as an earlier species."

vulpes82 May 22, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Archie has become incredibly progressive, actually. It's kinda weird, but wonderful.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 12:02 am

I love Cracked. I kept trying to assume that it was essentially the same thing as Mad Magazine, but it's really good. I mean, not that Mad wasn't.

ChuckieJesus May 23, 2012 at 8:07 am

Nobody remembers Crazy. :(

flamingpdog May 23, 2012 at 12:14 am

Well, from the article I'd have to say it looks like if Archie divorces Veronica, she has someone to fall back on.

Brb!

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 1:57 am

They produced a limited series surrounding that gay character, and now it looks like he's going to get his own digest size too. His books are displayed prominently on the splash page, and supposedly they've been huge sellers with people who never even read Archie before (including yours truly).

Seriously, Archie comics has been downright amazing lately. The ease with which they introduced an openly gay character into a medium for kids, and acted like it was no big deal, is nothing short of inspiring.

Neoyorquino May 22, 2012 at 9:16 pm

Nope. I won't be happy until my comic book heroes are caught up in an interracial, bisexual love quadrangle.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Get Marv Wolfman to write it and George Perez and Phil Jimenez to do the artwork and I'll buy two copies.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:56 pm

I prefer a love bi-dodecahedron. Be careful though…you might wind up sucking your own dick.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:03 pm

If I could suck my own dick I wouldn't need to read comic books!

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 10:41 pm

I once knew a guy who could suck his own dick….skinny fucker. Demonstrated at a party once. Years later he was confined to a wheelchair. Coincidence? I think not.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:40 am

Could he still suck his own dick though? I mean yeah, being confined to a wheelchair would suck, but it would suck less if you could blow yourself.

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 1:47 am

Demonstrated at a party once

The hell kinda parties are you going to, and how can I score an invite?

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:45 am

Now that I think about it I want to be involved in a love tesseract. That way I could suck my own dick and violate causality by cumming in my mouth before I started blowing myself. Am I over-thinking this?

Lascauxcaveman May 23, 2012 at 1:04 am

I would say, yes, you are definitely overthinking this.

Now let me tell you about this really strange dream I had last night…

Skullfry Buddha May 23, 2012 at 1:09 am

This…THIS is why I love Wonkette. Only three types make me laugh: Myself. Professional Comedians, and Wonkettes.

It's only you folks that keep me from being a complete auto-erotic whore monger.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 2:01 am

OK, I KNOW I'm overthinking this, but — how the fuck do you become a complete auto-erotic *whore*monger? Or are you just whoring yourself out to the hand, here?

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 3:24 am

"Criminals are a superstitious, cowardly lot, so my disguise must be able to strike terror into the their hearts. I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible…A…A"

As if in answer a huge, auto-erotic whoremonger flies in the open window.

"An auto-erotic whoremonger. That's it! It's an omen. I shall become a complete auto-erotic whoremonger!"

And thus is borne this weird figure of the dark, this avenger of evil. The Auto-erotic Whoremonger-Man!

Too derivative?

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:16 pm

Maybe it will just be an imaginary story where Superman is exposed to Pink Kryptonite

Tundra Grifter May 22, 2012 at 9:17 pm

A very good friend of mine told me his family used to watch "Mission Impossible" every week because Barney (not the green dinosaur) was the first national tv blah character who was just a character. Not a pimp or other crook, not a sidekick, just a guy.

This was a big, big deal.

Funny how it didn't come up that blah folks were being exploited by that move. Or when Jack Johnson and Joe Lewis were heavyweight champions of the world.

Fukui-sanRadioBarb May 22, 2012 at 9:20 pm

Same with the wife and Star Trek (minority pilot, who later turned out to be teh ghey, and Uhura), and Hawai'i 5-0 (minority in Kono, as policeman not crim). 60s stuff.

So Tired May 22, 2012 at 9:32 pm

I remember watching Mission Impossible as a kid and thinking why WASN'T it a big deal? They were treating him just like everyone else. As a scrawny white kid growing up in Redneckville, northwest FL, it was a wonder.

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:43 am

Many years ago I heard an interview with the widow of Nat "King" Cole. It was often pointed out he was the first Black performer with a national tv variety show.

She said the iimportant thing wasn't that he was the first one. The important thing was he wasn't the last one.

memzilla May 22, 2012 at 10:12 pm

In a conversation with a blah friend, the subject turned to blah actors in the 1930s — Hattie McDaniels, Bill "Bojangles" Robinson, Stepin Fetchit, Butterfly McQueen — and how some viewed them as victims of exploitation by the Hollywood system.

We agreed that they were, but more importantly, that they were blah people gettin' paid in the middle of the Great Depression.

vulpes82 May 22, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Hattie McDaniels: "I'd rather play a maid than be one."

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:44 am

"I can make $1,000 a week in Hollywood playing a maid. Or I can make $10 a week being one."

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:49 am

W.C. Fields was on Broadway with the great Bert Williams, at that time one of the highest paid performers in America.

Fields asked Williams to go out for a drink. They picked a posh New York hotel, figuring they both would get served.

Fields was charged fifty cents for his drink. Williams was charged $50.

Williams pulled out his wallet, laid five $100 bills on the counter, and said "I''ll have ten more."

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:09 pm

T.G. — YOU are one of the reasons I keep coming back here.

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 8:44 pm

AOMM:

You are much too kind. I can still remember coming to Wonkette as a wide-eyed kid, reading the comments and wondering if someday I could ever do that.

Of course, back then I had a job…

Lascauxcaveman May 23, 2012 at 1:15 am

Yeah, I remember watching Mish Imp (as we called it) religiously and Barney was always just really cool. Total professional, on top of things all the way.

Now Linc, over on The Mod Squad, OTOH, always seemed to be trying too hard: trying impress the hot white chick

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:49 am

Solid!

Tundra Grifter May 23, 2012 at 11:50 am

Given what happend to his career after that show, guess he became the missing Linc.

DemmeFatale May 22, 2012 at 9:18 pm

So let me get this straight: the wing-nutz actually WANT this company to fail?!
(CAPITALISM LIBEL!!!)

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 12:09 am

Why are they trying to punish success?

PuckStopsHere May 22, 2012 at 9:19 pm

I hope he's packing condoms in the Batman Utility Belt!

Werner_Voss May 23, 2012 at 2:30 am

Speaking of which, where's the 'mandatory condom law'? }:{

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:19 pm

I'll agree with Johnathan V. Last about Dan DiDio sucking (the only time I will ever agree with any of the retards who write for the Weakly Standard about anything) but will point out that Last is an ignorant fuck (of course he is, he writes for the Weakly Standard) if he thinks that homosexuality in comics is anything new.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 9:26 pm

How could anyone forget Buttman and Rubbin?

Arken May 22, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Damn it, beat me to it by only 40 minutes!

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:12 pm

Great minds and all that. But despite my annoyance at Bryan Fischer and Johnathan Last for their pearl-clutching I am pleased to have a reason to link to Superdickery.

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Yes. Didio sucks. I hate to agree with 'em too. But I gave up on DC entirely after the recent asinine reboot. Yes, I'm nearly 40 and read comics. And I don't live in my mom's basement.

Also, they didn't bitch as much about lesbian Batwoman, is that because lesbos are hawt and gays are icky?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:07 am

ZOMG!! All those YEARS of reading/watching Batman, and (sob!) I never even KNEW!

GhostBuggy May 23, 2012 at 1:08 am

DiDio may suck, but that article is still way off in its timeline of events at DC and the reasons for various changes. Not that we should be going to the fainting couch at the thought of WS cocking it all up, of course. I mean, Superman's gotta fly, Aquaman's gotta swim.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 1:41 am

Usually I RTFA, but with the Weakly Standard why bother?

imissopus May 23, 2012 at 1:50 am

Don't even get me started on that "White Flag" song.

GhostBuggy May 23, 2012 at 11:35 am

Well done. Took me a while to figure it out.

bumfug May 22, 2012 at 9:20 pm

At least these guys have super powers, not like that ass-bandit Archie and his pack of dick smokers.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:51 am
Groupshrug May 22, 2012 at 9:22 pm

New Batman story idea: Batman gets thrown in to the electric fence concentration camp for the gays and frees them, but not before having lots of hot, dirty, drippy, filthy gay sex.

SayItWithWookies May 23, 2012 at 1:20 am

Spartacus! Which was totally not gay!

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 1:48 am

How did you get my screenplay?

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 2:31 am

Sir. Your screenplay must have gotten out onto the net. Lindsey Graham is on line one. He says that he wants to play a noble US Senator who ends up in the camp, totally by mistake of course, and who is liberated by Batman. Allen West is on line two, he says that he wants to play the noble black conservative US Congressman who ends up in the camp, totally by mistake of course when he was searching for the missing Lindsey Graham, who also ends up being liberated by the Batman. Shit, line three is ringing. "Hello? No Mr. Bachmann, we haven't finished casting yet. No, I can't say if there's a role for a psychologist who ends up in the camp, totally by accident of course, and who ends up being liberated by the Batman. Yes, yes, I will mention your idea of having your wife play an evil, camp guard named "Miss Thing"

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 9:20 am

"Hello? …No, Mr. Foley. We have no plans of filming on location at a daycare. Stop calling."

Doktor StrangeZoom May 22, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Meh. Superdickery has known the shocking truth for YEARS

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Damn…beat me to it.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 22, 2012 at 9:52 pm

Boner boner boner!

Beowoof May 22, 2012 at 10:15 pm

Boner crime, sounds as if they are talking they're talking about John Boehner getting caught ala Eric Massa.

CthuNHu May 22, 2012 at 9:26 pm

No! Not Northstar! He was my hero growing up! I had his posters on my walls! This shatters my ideals of, uh, um, …

There's a superhero named "Northstar"? Really? What does he do, listen with superhuman ears for the wails of tourists lost in the big city, kids lost in the woods, and drivers whose GPS has stranded them in a desert, and then drop from the sky to give them directions?

Doktor StrangeZoom May 22, 2012 at 9:28 pm

Well, and he made a pretty sweet engine for Cadillacs in the 90's.

James Michael Curley May 23, 2012 at 6:00 am

Around 2004 you could sell your Caddy El Dorado Northstar engine for more than any of the other same year Cadillacs.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Yeah, and he's Canadian too.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:41 pm

Well…that explains the gay part.

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:26 pm

And this is why my gay Canadian college roommate collected Alpha Flight comics. Well, also, the Canadian thing, but he was happy that there was at last an out gay superhero.

BarackMyWorld May 23, 2012 at 6:05 am

His power is he moves super fast and can shoot a blinding light. His secret identity was a professional skier. He was one of the X-Men. I'm not kidding.

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 9:25 am

And in one series that was later retconned, he was revealed to be an interdimensional fairy suffering from a deadly immune disease!

Comics have a…checkered past with the lavender brotherhood.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:31 pm

A lot of us Oldz who might also have had Teh Dreaded Ghey looked for those little signs of hope in our comix.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 9:29 pm

DC needz to create a new gay super character – Fischerman. But what would his super power be?

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:35 pm

super-felching

not that Radio May 22, 2012 at 9:36 pm

The ability to invert and distort reality?

PsycWench May 22, 2012 at 10:25 pm

I was thinking "deny reality in its face" but invert and distort works well too.

Fukui-sanRadioBarb May 22, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Bigotry.

Negropolis May 22, 2012 at 9:43 pm

Withering, and pointed homophobic rants?

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Fischerman would also drive around schoolyards in the Fischermobile, an unmarked white van, handing out candy and trying to recruit a young, teen, sidekick with firm, yet hairless buttocks.

GlowneyHouse May 22, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Aquaman's significent other, obviously. First issue could have them out riding seahorses together.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 12:11 am

Super gay? Destroying traditional marriage, obvs.

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 12:40 am

okay, what in the fuck. I just spent 10 minutes reading about George Tierney of Greeneville, South Carolina. And now I want to go there and show him "how the internet works" with fists. I WAS TRYING TO GO TO BED. Good lord. Well, anyway, thanks for the blood pressure spike. High five, nice new avatar, and of course, CUNTS.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 12:42 am

Sorry – he's my new obsession. I can't get enough of his stupidity. It's like crack.

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 12:48 am

I can totally see how that could happen. I am freaked the fuck out. He should get some intensive anger management counseling and then take a computer course, but not online. I bet he has a gun in the house and no dictionary. What a fucktard. Ah well, the more you know…..

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 1:15 am

I'll bet that George Tierney of Greeneville, South Carolina is pretty stoked about the new gay DC comics character.

DerrickWildcat May 23, 2012 at 1:31 am

Do you think, George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina will ever clean the google of all mentions of George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina?

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 1:56 am

I don't know, but I hear George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina has all the lawyers, so maybe we should ask George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina if George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina did in fact, find a lawyer to tell George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina he could make "me getting paid" happen.

A toast, to George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina, from the dregs of this bottle of $10 Christian Audigier Ed Hardy wine someone left at my house (this is a real thing!) my only wish is that it had come in an actual douche-bag. Cheers!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:10 am

Drilling butts at 200 paces with his eyes, while fully clothed. BUTT-SECHS!

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 1:20 am

Okay, see, now this though? This is a thing I WOULD be willing to find out more about. Cause knowledge is power! And buttsechs with your eyes fully clothed? Amazing.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:24 am

See, if I could figure out how to grant this superpower to Wonketteerz? Filthy, stinking rich, I'm tellin' ya, and in no time flat, too.

OK, maybe only in Hobo Beans ™, because Wonketteerz ain't wealthy, but still.

SexySmurf May 22, 2012 at 9:34 pm

DC Comics will “turn” one of its major legacy superheroes gay in June

How is that going to work? Is he going to get bitten by a radioactive Rentboy?

PlanetWingNut May 23, 2012 at 5:00 pm

its not gonna be a senator come on now…

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:36 pm

They'll probably just do something lame like make Aquaman gay and if they do, who cares, because it's fucking Aquaman.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 12:12 am

Have to share this, because I enjoyed it. Also, anyone who can include the lyrics "seven gen and tonics" in a song is my hero.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Twyrmr4sMow

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:42 am

That is freaking awesome!

pepperpat May 23, 2012 at 10:34 am

He could do a crossover issue with Marvel's Sub-Mariner.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 9:37 pm

This morning Marvel announced that their big homosexual character, Northstar, will get gay married—interracially gay married!

I guess it's finally time for Supergirl to marry Comet.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:46 pm

Nay…they' just horse around, but it's nothing serious.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:40 pm

This fuckstick had the nerve to write this while at the same time Strifetime pimps Bristlecone for a reality show?

No shame…no shame.

Negropolis May 22, 2012 at 9:41 pm

Yes, because one way to maintain and grow your customer base of young men is to introduce gay characters. Yeah, they are totally doing this cynically for the money. lol

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:44 pm

Well of course DC is going down the shitter. Everyone knows that Superman is a Dick

rocktonsam May 22, 2012 at 9:45 pm

"very very gay" and "sexually deviant."

new super hero! Captain Obvious!!

cripes almighty

FakaktaSouth May 22, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Yo, can I still be sexually deviant if I am very, very straight? Or just bi-curious? Did the gays call all the deviance? Because I think this could be a thing I would like.

Chichikovovich May 22, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Since this is deviance as assessed by Brian Fischer, I think it will suffice to have had sex at least once in any position other than missionary, or with the lights on, to count as massively deviant.

You sicko!

FakaktaSouth May 22, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Man, I need to raise my standards. I really think I could teach this Brian guy a thing or two. Oh wait eewwww. No, I mean, I could show him some videos?

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 10:35 pm

And the address of your website is?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:16 am

I have a built-in DVD player. Or streaming. I could do streaming.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:16 am

Jesus, I don't even want to know what you call me behind my back.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:00 pm

You're a woman, by the standards of Bryan Fischer, the American Family Association and everyone who works at the Weakly Standard you're already a deviant and a degenerate slut just by the virtue of having two X chromosomes.

FakaktaSouth May 22, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Is it bad that that is the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day?
but yeah, I think that's probably about right.

George Spelvin May 22, 2012 at 10:50 pm

Not only are you a double-X, but it appears that you may actually derive pleasure from one or more sex acts.

Thatsa some spicy deviance.

radio-of-owls May 22, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Damn. I was all set to call you a depraved pervert and he beat me to the punch. Wish I wasn't so shy around flatitious hussies. :(

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:38 am

Can I also point out that you make fun of "authority" figures like Bryan Fischer and refuse to take them seriously and that you have no respect for the traditions of American Conservatism.

Fukui-sanRadioBarb May 23, 2012 at 12:20 am

Oh hell no. Deviance is where one finds it, and some people find it more than others.

I love deviance and will defend my and your right to practice such.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:17 am

(Hugs Fukui-san most fondly)

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:15 am

LGBTQQ — includes Queer and Questioning, sweetheart. After all, you don't really know how you'll feel about daisy chaining with fifteen other women/men/both until you've TRIED it at least once, right?

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 1:46 am

It seems to me that you'd have to try it at least n times where n is the number of possible combinations of naughty bits. Do I have the math right?

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 2:10 am

I like this math of yours. It's more to my taste than attempting to figure out Obama's SAT scores by dividing the number of SAT takers by the available configurations of constellations.

Where can I subscribe, or learn more? I would like two copies of your newsletter.

FakaktaSouth May 23, 2012 at 2:13 am

"How do you knooooooow you don't like it if you won't tryyyyyyy it?"

Exactly. It's just common sense. Like I was always told, you don't have to eat everything but you have to at least taste it, you might love it!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Yeah. That's how I got started on teh Rocky Road to Deviance.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:53 pm

DC Comics is using gays for, get this, marketing purposes

Well duh fucking duh. Given that rightwingnuts everywhere are losing their ever loving minds over what consenting adults do in their bedrooms, DC is just…(wait for it)

Exploiting Chaos

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:17 am

The Sacred Chao?

Oh, NOOOOEEES!!

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 9:54 pm

Northstar wasn't the first gay Marvel character, the Human Torch has been flaming for years. Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week. Try the chicken.

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 10:38 pm

*sniff* self-esteem craters*

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:18 am

There, there (pats the hairy little rodent back)

tessiee May 22, 2012 at 11:08 pm

"Try the chicken."

I like them young, but not *that* young.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 23, 2012 at 12:27 am

See, I'd have guessed it was Flaming Carrot.

Ut!

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:35 am

Geek point of order. I said "Marvel" character. Flaming Carrot was published by Aardvark-Vanaheim.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Hey…DC should do a comic about a dude who's a straitlaced US Senator by day, but is a toe tapping closeted hypocrite by night.

We can call him Larry Craigman.

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Marvel Comics is on line two sir. They say that they're suing us because Larry Craigman is a transparent copy of their character, The Fabulous, Flaming Hambiscuitman.

PsycWench May 22, 2012 at 10:27 pm

AKA "WideStanceMan"

Dudleydidwrong May 22, 2012 at 10:36 pm

There are about 30 others who are auditioning for the part. They all seem to know their lines already.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:19 am

There's always MarkFoleyman, texting and harrassing underage pages. A real page-turner, as it were.

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 10:09 am

Ba-dum Ba-dum.
And don't forget to tip the waitstaff!

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:15 pm

Just the tip, Miss, honest.

pepperpat May 23, 2012 at 10:41 am

He's not deviant enough though. David Vitter would be better suited for that.

Skullfry Buddha May 22, 2012 at 10:01 pm

I'm sorry…but comics have been dead to me ever since they took The Tick off the air.

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:29 pm

I do hope you mean the cartoon and not the pale imitation live action show that had one thing going for it (Liz Vassey). Well, two, if you count the casting of Patrick Warburton. The only man physically right for the role. But that show stank on ice.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 23, 2012 at 9:19 am

"It's OK to play with dolls!" –Battle cry of Baby Boomerangutan

Arken May 22, 2012 at 10:07 pm

I didn't think there was even a question about which D.C. superhero was gay…
http://superdickery.com/images/stories/oneshot/sm

Mumbly_Libel May 23, 2012 at 8:00 am
johnnyzhivago May 22, 2012 at 10:08 pm

The Justice League is in Emergency Session on this matter as we speak…

Wile E. Quixote May 22, 2012 at 10:08 pm

I keep hoping that Marvel will make Reed Richards, a.k.a. Mr. Fantastic gay, or at least draw a couple of panels where he stretches out his dick and blows himself. Hey, fuck you. Don't you look at me that way, I know that you've thought about it too.

iburl May 22, 2012 at 10:19 pm

What, Plastic Man not gay enough for you?

Sharkey May 22, 2012 at 11:05 pm

Doc Oc has a point of order, if the court allows…

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:54 am

There's something about Mister Fantastic doing it that makes it more transgressive. Especially if Invisible Woman was invisible and secretly watching him and fapping herself silly.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 1:43 am

As played by Ioan Gruffudd, he was TOTALLY gay, but that is just what happens when CERTAIN British/Irish actors attempt an American accent (see also: Jamie Bamber, Colin Farrell).

johnnyzhivago May 22, 2012 at 10:10 pm

BTW, if you've never seen the "Justice Friends" cartoons – which used to air with Dexter's Laboratory (my kids are teens now and these are the shows I used to watch with them) – go google them.

They are hillariously funny and make a mockery of all the hyper testosterone heros you know and love….

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Val Halen. A joke kids would never get.

weejee May 22, 2012 at 10:11 pm

And Bryan Fischer outs Nancy Drew as a Transylvanian transvestite in 3, 2, 1…

mavenmaven May 22, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Nancy Drew is Orly Taitz?

weejee May 22, 2012 at 10:25 pm

ftw

flamingpdog May 22, 2012 at 10:45 pm
ChapterUndVerse May 23, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Is she a sweet transsexual tranvestite, too?

not that Radio May 22, 2012 at 10:16 pm

Freakazoid is totally not gay.

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Of course not, he was secretly a nerdy kid who couldn't get chicks! He got his powers from the internet, which as we know is made for porn. It makes perfect sense now.

PsycWench May 22, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Well, it's good that the characters are getting gay married. Because if there is anything that the comic book demographic is totally into, it's marriage.

Sharkey May 22, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Marriage, and superpowers. In that order.

(gay what now?)

Buckminster May 22, 2012 at 11:26 pm

It's the closest many who follow the book demo are going to get to close physical companionship. Oh, Sheldon?

shortsandpants May 22, 2012 at 10:23 pm

Unlike SNL's Ambiguously Gay Duo, there is nothing "ambiguous" about Robin's preference. It's more of a "Painfully Obvious OH MY GOD HOW DEEP AND DARK IS THAT CLOSET" duo.

V572 Is this him? May 22, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Superman, on the other hand, was NOT GAY. He didn't put it to Lois because he was shy, like any respectable superhero. Plus Perry White was always screaming at him. He only had a Fortress of Solitude because he liked to be alone sometimes. Well, a lot of the time. Sometimes he did have to duck into the closet, but NOT BECAUSE HE WAS GAY.

Also not gay:

"My Three Sons."
"Bachelor Father"
"Bonanza"
"The Bob Cummings Show"
"Fury"
"Maverick"
"Rocky Jones, Space Ranger" (heh heh)
"Tom Corbett, Space Cadet" (ha ha!)

Totally gay: "Father Knows Best"

Buckminster May 22, 2012 at 11:25 pm

No wonder J. Edgar Hoover got into prom dresses!

BarackMyWorld May 23, 2012 at 6:09 am

But can you explain why Clark and Jimmy Olsen were eating breakfast together in those old cereal commercials?

tessiee May 22, 2012 at 10:55 pm

Only funny episode of "The Ambiguously Gay Duo":
Sidekick: I'm pretty sure they're gay.
Supervillian: Look, I don't… [aside, to the Ambiguously Gay Duo] Do you mind? We're *trying* to have a conversation here!
Ambiguously Gay Duo: Oh, sorry.
*stops tying up Supervillain and Sidekick*
Supervillian: Look, I don't have a *problem* with it, I just don't *see* it!

not that Radio May 22, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Does "Mork" count as a superhero?

ttommyunger May 22, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Gee, Bryan Fischer sure thinks about dick a lot…..just sayin.

DerrickWildcat May 22, 2012 at 11:12 pm

The ones that wear their underwear over their tights are gay.

NYNYNYjr May 22, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Action comics. I'm going to go out and buy the latest issue of Action Comics and read it while I have an egg cream, and then go vote for Warren G Harding.

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 1:58 am

Bully idea, old chum!

DocChaos May 22, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Batman and Robin greet the morning together.
http://boards.collectors-society.com/attachments/

alteredimages May 22, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Now to be fair, there was a war on, and there was rationing, and, erm, a shortage of… beds. And… blankets? Maybe? I got nothing.

LionHeartSoyDog May 23, 2012 at 12:34 am

"Forbidden"

vulpes82 May 22, 2012 at 11:21 pm

This thread proves once again, without a shadow of a doubt, that we are all a bunch of NERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS.

BZ1 May 22, 2012 at 11:21 pm

wait a second, repubs admit to reading?

Fare la Volpe May 23, 2012 at 9:45 am

They mostly just look at the pictures.

The pictures of sweaty, muscled men in tight, form-fitting spandex.

Sharkey May 22, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Sexually, the fappability of this post is "very, very gay".

MarionNYNY May 22, 2012 at 11:41 pm

Uh dudes, hey, Wonder Woman — raised on an all woman magical island, called PARADISE ISLAND. Never saw a man till she was 1200 years old or something (I think they're all immortal).

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:58 am

Actually when DC rebooted Wonder Woman in the 1980s with Perez and Wolfman this was hinted at at one point.

ifthethunderdontgetya May 22, 2012 at 11:55 pm

Same old, same old.

In the late 1940's and the early 1950's, Dr. Frederic Wertham was touring the country blaming comic books for the 'moral decline' of that eras youth. He claimed that Batman and Robin were a 'homosexual fantasy,' that women were always victims with large breasts, and that horror comics lead children to commit murder. But wait… He said that women were always victims. What about Wonder Woman?

Well, he said that she had to be a lesbian.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 1:43 am

Not only that, but he said it was like a bad thing.

Sharkey May 23, 2012 at 12:17 am

Bartender, a round of drinks on the house?

Fukui-sanRadioBarb May 23, 2012 at 12:18 am

I'll buy.

flamingpdog May 23, 2012 at 12:23 am

If I have to be on the wagon much longer, I'm gonna have a heart attack.

Callyson May 23, 2012 at 2:30 am

Tried to quit drinking earlier this year, then read the news and said "Capital WTF?!?"

Am hoping for 2013…

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Why do you have to be on the wagon? Weed's better for ya, plus it's legal in your state, now.

Fred_Wertham_Jr May 23, 2012 at 12:38 am

Dad was right.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 12:55 am

Totally on topic but was casting Robert Downey, Jr. as Tony Stark in the Iron Man franchise a brilliant bit of casting or what?

fitley May 23, 2012 at 1:13 am

The issue where the gay super-heroes thrash the pedophile gang of priests is really going to get Teabungers doing the St.Vitas dance.

imissopus May 23, 2012 at 1:19 am

Sammy Clay libel!

SayItWithWookies May 23, 2012 at 1:38 am

Oh, the Weekly Standard (also Jonah Goldberg's euphemism for his bowel movement) is up in arms over a comic book having a gay character? Heh heh — who wants to tell them about the army?

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 1:38 am

Who DOESN'T want a big, homosexual buck?

Oh, money. Sorry, not interested.

mcrummett May 23, 2012 at 1:48 am

"…other organs of polite society…"
(snicker) He said "organ!" (giggle)

mcrummett May 23, 2012 at 1:50 am

The Right couldn't "changes its strategy to widen its demographic appeal" if it's life depended on it. Oh, wait! It does! Yea!

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 1:54 am

Am I the only person who ever wonders if there is an alternate universe located far, far away in the realms of probability where Touko Laaksonen, a.k.a Tom of Finland came to the United States in the early 1960s and became part of the Marvel bullpen along with Jack Kirby, Steve Ditko and John Romita? I'm telling you, drawing all of the Avengers like this with big old porno staches would be awesome, especially with a bunch of Kirby Krackle in the background.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:56 am

Oh, yes. I mean, yes. That is. Yes.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 2:20 am

OK, so now that I mention it am I the only person who thinks that that would actually be a pretty freakin' cool alternate universe located far, far away in the realms of probability? Plus if Tom of Finland had been drawing for Marvel there wouldn't have been any of that nonsense where Bruce Banner transforms into the Hulk and all of his clothes are torn off except for his pants, which not only transform with him but also remain on, regardless of how much he exerts himself or how much damage he takes (which, when you think about it is every bit as ridiculous as the idea that exposure to massive quantities of gamma radiation would do anything other than kill you very quickly). No, Tom of Finland would have shown us the Hulk in all of his hot, green, turgidly raging glory, and we'd be all the better for it.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:04 pm

I always wondered about those pants. I mean, srsly, this was in the days BEFORE Lycra Spandex, or whatever that stuff is.

PlanetWingNut May 23, 2012 at 5:16 pm

if that happend…Galactus would be a size queens delight… http://www.comics.org/issue/19911/cover/4/ The Coming of Galactus, indeed!!!!!

Fukui-sanRadioBarb May 23, 2012 at 2:18 am

Haha. I'm straight and I know it (I tried the forbidden), but even I can see the raw sexuality in Tom of Finland.

Can you imagine the evangelical meltdown if that became mainstream? I would love to see that.

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 3:01 am

I can just see the re-imagined origin of the Batman from Detective Comics #33.

INT NIGHT – BRUCE WAYNE'S STUDY
Bruce Wayne is dressed in a rather fabulous dressing gown which nicely accentuates his pecs, abs and package. HIs study is tastefully decorated.

WAYNE:
Criminals are a superstitious, cowardly and homophobic lot. So my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible, wearing a costume made of kevlar, black leather and neoprene that will accentuate my abs, pecs and glutes and draw the eye to my package, but tastefully, always tastefully.

As if in answer a huge bat flies in the open window!

WAYNE:
A bat! That's it! It's an omen. I shall become a bat. And then I'll run around Gotham City at night fucking criminals in the ass, because if anything will strike terror into a criminal's heart it's being jumped in a dark alley by some crazy guy dressed up as a flying, nocturnal rodent and fucked in the ass!

Negropolis May 23, 2012 at 7:59 am

You've thought way too hard about this. LOL!

Wile E. Quixote May 23, 2012 at 3:12 am

Sort of kind of on-topic, and very funny and deserving of mention. Jay Pinkerton's Batman Origin Comics.

BarackMyWorld May 23, 2012 at 6:02 am

Um…Bat-WOMAN is the gay one. Since, like, 2005.

SaintRond May 23, 2012 at 8:40 am

This guy has spent his whole life wanting to be fucked while being unable to find anyone deranged enough to do it for him.

Of course he's pissed off.

Nopantsmcgee May 23, 2012 at 8:43 am

Isn't it easier to decide which Super Hero is NOT gay?

BaldarTFlagass May 23, 2012 at 9:03 am

I think the Comedian from Watchmen. But he was a rapey pathological sociopath, so probably not a very good role model.

Doktor StrangeZoom May 23, 2012 at 9:10 am

Bryan Fissure? He gets kind of butthole at times

DahBoner May 23, 2012 at 11:07 am

Gay Comics for Conservatives:

The Adventures of Airport Bathroom Man: TAP TAP TAP…

Billmatic May 23, 2012 at 11:11 am

The worst news about all of this is that Scott Lobdell is still writing comics.

a_pink_poodle May 23, 2012 at 12:26 pm

And drunk, minority, homosexuals. (I’m kidding—but only about the alcoholism.)

Oh no, now the minorities are ruining comic books too?! We should put them behind the electric fence with the gays too and in a few years they'll "die off" too. WINKWINK

BombyMcGee May 23, 2012 at 4:31 pm

"DC was going to the diversity woodshed."

Doesn't "going to the woodshed" mean punishing someone for something?

Idiom fail.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 1:12 am

The less you want to. I, too, have been doing my best to gain new and exciting publicity for Mr. Tierney. He'll surely thank me SOME day. If not in THIS life.

Skullfry Buddha May 23, 2012 at 1:56 am

Alas…this was back in my 20s. My middle-aged compatriots don't want to talk of such things, and it would be creepy if I sought out folks young enough to appreciate such antics.

DerrickWildcat May 23, 2012 at 2:05 am

I sure hope, Sunland Staffing, also of Greenville South Carolina doesn't see what George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina said on the Internet. I would guess that Sunland Staffing of Greenville South Carolina wouldn't be too happy that their employee, George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina said those horrible things.

anniegetyerfun May 23, 2012 at 9:17 am

Their website is epic. The design alone made my week.

ChapterUndVerse May 23, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Sunland Staffing, of Greenville, South Carolina, is proud of its affirmative action policy with regard to the retention of George Tierney of Greenville, South Carolina, meeting its quota of gynoophobic non-blah personnel without any superpowers whatsoevah. In fact, the Palmetto State is using this fine young man's outstanding performance to keep South Carolina's hopes alive in the race to the bottom it nearly lost to Louisiana's Mark Traina.

vulpes82 May 23, 2012 at 9:34 am

Thank you. I try.

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 9:56 am

Sigh…I did so *many* things in my 20s that would be creepy to reenact in middle age.

/becomes lost in a hazy daydream of sex, drugs and adventure….

UW8316154 May 23, 2012 at 10:02 am

Only if the whoremonger has compound eyes, like The Fly.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 23, 2012 at 12:21 pm

I'm tellin' ya. First things start out harmlessly enough. Everyone is offered a "taste." Next thing ya know, there's a writhing ball of gaysexin' bodies on the rug, and it's downhill from THERE.

Ann_ObeyMe_Money May 24, 2012 at 1:37 pm

(Hugs TG fondly) Yeah, me too. Jobs. I remember those.

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