Hey Drug War, what’s new? Lock up any first-time-offender grannies who had no idea they were participating in a drug-mule operation between Messico and Tejas? You did? Awesome. For how long? Forever? Well it is ABOUT TIME! Good job, Drug War! And also, super-good-job, jury! We will no longer be under siege from the insidious threat that is Elisa Castillo not being behind bars for the rest of her natural life! Great life sentence, everyone involved! Well, everyone except for the actual drug kingpins who get non-life sentences or witness protection instead!
But did Elisa Castillo, who never touched a single drug, really not know she was helping run a drug operation?
At the urging of her boyfriend, Martin Ovalle, [Elisa] Castillo became partners with a smooth-talking Mexican resident who said he wanted to set up a Houston-based bus company.
But the buses were light on passengers and shuttled thousands of pounds of cocaine into the United States and millions of dollars back to Mexico. Her lawyers argued she was naive.
Castillo claims she didn’t know about the drug operation, but agents said she should have known something was wrong when quantities of money and drugs were repeatedly found on the coaches.
“After hearing all the evidence as presented from both the government and defense in this case, the jury found her guilty … ,” said Kenneth Magidson, chief prosecutor here.
Well, “should have known” should definitely be enough proof to hand someone a life sentence. Get over yourself, Grandma! And please enjoy having already served a longer sentence than Ken Lay ever saw. Mazel. [HoustonChronicle]
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Nice pic of Herman Cain's desk.
Herman "Co" Cain?
Wait until the ladies find out that Herman has a different idea about blow.
They want a job, right?
I dunno, inhaling pizza through a straw seems more like a Chris Christie joke to me.
It's like a turducken. Christie inhales the models.
Can we try this scheme on Grover Norquist?
I'd rather forcefeed him cocaine condoms until either he or one of them explodes.
"A mint, sir?"
Castillo claims she didn’t know about the drug operation, but agents said she should have known something was wrong when quantities of money and drugs were repeatedly found on the coaches.
Because no one ever smuggles drugs on a bus across a border…
They use the NJ Transit trains instead?
Ridin' that train, high on cocaine…
NJ Transit?
Jebus, those drug cartels would be filing complaints to the er, 'Transportation authority responsible for complaining', that their 'goods' weren't getting to their suppliers on time. Ever.
"Why do these passengers always seem to leave their cocaine and money behind?"
Wouldn't you suspect that drug traffickers would take better care of their product. Drug addicts on the other hand..
Wow, haven't seen a picture of the Olsen twins for a while. Thanks, Rebecca!
Actually, that's Miley Cirus and her mom.
Dammit Chil! I thought it was Lindsey Lohan and her mom!
If she had given if a lot of thought Elisa Castillo would have just robbed some guy using a gun and had a much lighter sentence.
If she'da shot him, Stand Your Ground, baybay!
Or she could have robbed us of billions through derivative trading and not even been indicted.
His Hairness informs us that the counterparty to those deals made billions, so it's a wash. That's how capitalism works!
Well, that, and if the trader can't pay his losses, the taxpayers pick up the difference.
Exactly–that worked so well in 2008 when AIG was counterparty to a few trillion in deals.
Was she the driver? If not, I think there might be a shadow of a doubt. Ah, trusting young love.
And the rosy cheeks of grandchildren need never fear her pinches again. NEVAR FORGET!!1!
Also, was there ever any justice, real justice, ever anywhere?
Here's some.
Grandma is locked up, James O'Keefe wanders the streets freely. Another day when I need a drink or ten…
I'll sleep better now, knowing this.
Why doesn't this argument apply to bankers?
An expensive Amani suit offers a lot of protection. Much like Superman’s cape.
Or batfink's wings.
"Your lawsuits cannot harm me – my money is like a shield of steel!''
Bankers transcend law.
They don't transcend it; they dictate it, to Geithner, Bernanke, Phil Gramm, etc. "We don' need no stinkin' Glass-Steagall Act."
IOW, "Bankers don't transcend law, their donees transcribe it."
"I AM ABOVE THE LAW!!" — Guy on "South Park" with bad comb-over
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
"We don't want the smoking gun to be a cocaine cloud."
This makes me so frustrated I'm going to have to get high.
If you don't have access to a regular supply you might want to try the bus route from Houston to Mexico.
What's the lady-part equivalent of "whiskey-dick"? 'Cause I think those two ladies have it.
Vagin and tonic?
And Theresa Giudici roams the hills of Jersey, a free woman!
A freakin outdoor pizza oven? Who delivers, racoons?
Should have bundled that cocaine with some toxic hedge funds then she would have not only got off scott-free but would have got billions in bail outs too also.
Zombie super models snorting magic mushrooms from pizza.
Thanks Wonkette for stealing/posting my new series I was going to pitch to IFC.
"The Walking Duh"?
It's been done. "Keeping Up With The Kardashians"
The new Kardashian spinoff "What Happened to Bruce Jenner's Penis" is destined to be the "Joanie Loves Chachi" of the fall Teevee season.
He'll be appearing in an episode of the next season of American Horror Story: "What Happened to Bruce Jenner's Face"
The Bush twins are looking pretty good these days. Their fetus jar uncle? His water is a little cloudy. Good ol' Festus Cletus Bush, aka Uncle Fe-tus.
And yet James O'Keefe still walks free.
This seems more of a life sentence for stupidity. Dubya better watch out.
No, he's white.
The drug capos had something to trade: the secrets of criminal organizations. The biggest drug lords have pleaded guilty in exchange for more lenient sentences.
It's just like the people who propose repressive laws always say: if you're guilty, you've got nothing to fear from this law — only the innocent will get into trouble.
The new ad campaign for Pizza Hut looks a bit edgy.
The bitch is brown. She shoulda been behind bars for life long ago. Just on general principle.
Just think of all of the children who could have been saved had not this woman been locked up at birth!
Castillo became partners with a smooth-talking Mexican resident who said he wanted to set up a Houston-based bus company
And here I thought all the Romneys had left Mexico.
Is that what happened to Ken Layne?
Oh, Ken Lay…carry on.
The real lesson here is if you do the crime, you won't do the time, but that granny you swindled will.
It's grannies own fault for letting herself get swindled! Besides, shouldn't people be able to magically tell who is a criminal?
Used to be you could tell the criminal by their face piercings and tattoos. Now the criminals wear Savile Row business suits. Tricky, very tricky.
Here I thought the facial piercings and tattoos were just warnings that these were pretentious obnoxious modern hippie types.
That's nowadays. Years ago, when we were kids, those were the people our parents warned us about. Now they are our bosses.
Yeah, those suits are totally a new thing
Coke Adds Life, a life sentence that is.
She should have opened a chain of chicken restaurants, she could have called it Los Pollos Hermanos.
Long as she doesn't visit any thoroughly alienated, wheelchair-bound "uncles" in their nursing home…
Ding ding ding ding ding
The death of Gus Fring was one of the best death scenes evar!
No question the facts appear to indicate that abuela is guilty of being stupid beyond a reasonable doubt. Of course, if that were the operative standard for incarceration, most of the GOTeaP would be doing life sentences.
"We're gonna need a bigger straw."
Used to be, jails were full of criminals. But with the rise of the private prison industry and the concomitant strengthening of their lobby, combined with/leading to ever more draconian punishments for relatively victimless crimes, jails are now full of people who have made a stupid mistake. And black people.
Another epic case of Granny Snatching
See? Just like that, a jerb now opens for an American bus driver.
Upon being unjustly charged for drug trafficking, would it be a good idea to go out and meet actual drug dealers so I have enough information to trade for a lighter sentence?
I once worked for a methadone treatment clinic where our most famous client was a granny who looked like she could have stepped out of a Pepperidge Farms commercial. Just sayin'. (Still, I'll go along with that Granny Joan Baez, who said we should raze the prisons to the ground).
I'll go anywhere with Granny Joan Baez. Stunning Old Broad!
Ravi
30 Days Jail, 3 Years Probation, 300 Hours Community Service
http://www.northjersey.com/news/crime_courts/tyle…
That pizza looks cold.
Those women look dead.
This is whay racial profiling doesn't work. Grannies will do anything for some cash. Strip search them all.
Ya know, blaming one individual for cross-border drug running and brown peoples ability to roam about murika freely isnt prudent. Execpt Obama!!1!
Poor Dixie Chicks. I love them, but they have let themselves go since that "incident".
Snorting cocaine off of a pizza is the only way to snort cocaine. Also, extra sausage please.
Fuck grandmas and their old broken coochies.
-love, GOP
She is in Texas where she should count her blessings that she isn't executed. And real criminals know how to work the system, amirite W.
Best part is that it was all set up by undercover Chi-town PD.
Cruel and unusual punishment? In Texas?
STOP THE
PRESSESMOMMY WARBLOG!why would they send to jail the person who provides the drugs they are all clearly on?
I'm pretty sure, as anyone who has ever taken a long bus ride will confirm, that having a couple pounds of cocaine on board is more of a service than anything else.
Mema and friend, c. 1982
WTF?
YOU CAN SNORT PIZZA????!!!
Apparently, if you wear enough eye make-up. Or if you are the Governor of NJ.
I've taken the Bus cross-country and believe me, it seems like a life sentence no matter what you do.
Two hungry racoons snorting a pizza???
WHY I NEVER…
Pictured: Jenna Bush's bachelorette party.
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