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good headDo you remember Nancy French? She is the lady who writes all single-teen-mom Bristol Palin’s blog posts yelling at President Obama for not giving children a mother and a father, because gays. (It is that weird sad Maggie Gallagher Syndrome, where her boyfriend or whatever ditched her so she has redirected her rage onto Adam and Steve and whatnot with their whoozits in the uh-oh, NOM NOM NOM.) Anyway, Nancy French has done a thing in her own name this time, and that is that she has TRIUMPHED over SMUT, aka self-help books that teach you how to give good lady-head being displayed RIGHT IN THE SEXUALITY AISLE where customers might see them! No, they will just have to be in brown wrapper behind the counter please, these disgusting “books” what teach you how to bring your lady to orgasm, as if any lady would even WANT such a thing!

From Ms. French’s original blog post!

There, right next to the nice Civil War section (this is Tennessee, after all) is apparently a “sexuality” section, showing various sexual positions in plain view. And when I showing, I mean showing.

One book promised to make this the most erotic year of your life with 365 sexual positions – one of which was shown in plain, naked view on its cover. Another was about the art of erotic massage, and had a naked woman’s torso with a man’s hand – barely – covering her. […]

Thankfully, no damage had been done. I have a four, an eleven, and a thirteen year old, but they hadn’t seen the display. I promptly, turned the books face down, figuring some teenage kids had come in and thought it would be funny to put pornographic images out in plain view.

NOPE! The bookstore had put books about people having sex in their Sexuality section THEMSELVES! Blah blah blah, she calls corporate headquarters because of course she does.

While I was on hold, another worker explained that these were paid positions on the shelf and that they weren’t allowed to deviate from what corporate dictates.

“But my kids would learn exactly how to have sex simply from the cover,” I explained.

“Well, we have it tucked away next to the military history section,” she said. “Most kids don’t walk down that aisle. Just men.”

“Tucked away” is not what I’d call the second aisle of a store, in plain view, on the top shelf. Plus, are we okay sending men over to read about the Civil War, only to have them see pornographic images? This is what I explained to headquarters, which listened politely and supposedly took down the book title information.

Your hearts will all be gladdened by the news that Books-A-Million backed the fuck down when faced with the mighty flaming sword of justice wielded by Sarah and Bristol Palin’s blogwriter.

After my interview with Channel 2 News (which will air tonight at 10:00), we walked through the “Sexuality” aisle and found that they had, in fact, kept their word and removed the books from the sight of shoppers.
Thank you, Books-a-Million corporate headquarters and Books-a-Million Spring Hill for helping parents protect themselves – and their children – from seeing these inappropriate images.

Luckily, Nancy French is here to keep teens from getting “hooked on more than just reading.” We are pretty sure it was books that knocked up Bristol Palin (also: gays), it is called “logic,” why don’t you get some! [Nancy French, via Romenesko]

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