history's worst monster

Fox’s Dana Perino: California Gov. Jerry Brown Is A Dictator Because He Made A Youtube

President Stalin delivering a fireside chatDid you hear that California — the Golden Dream by the Sea — is having a wee little problem with its economy? What happened was a million years ago some proto-Grover Norquists made it impossible to ever raise taxes in the state, both by requiring a two-thirds supermajority in the Lege and by mandating that property taxes could never go up ever. Then, on top of that, Arnold Schwarzenegger took a ballpeen hammer to a car to symbolize SMASHing the Vehicle License Fee, and whoops! The very next year, California was in the red by … the exact same amount it had foregone in Vehicle License Fees! But everybody got $134 back to go spend at Wal-Mart, so good trade! This has been a problem for California, because it is no longer able to pay for things like world-class educational systems that used to draw people to it, but obviously, all current and historic budget shortfalls are Jerry Brown’s fault because he used to be a hippie, and did you know also Al Gore invented the Internet? Haw haw haw.

Anyhoo, now Jerry Brown has announced additional cuts to education and services (he has been pretty Austere already) and also plumped for an infinitesimal rise in the sales tax, and three percent more in income taxes for Facebook founders. How did he do this? In a YOUTUBE. And that makes him just like Evita Peron. Don’t cry for him, Sacramento, etc.

Here is Dana Perino, blahing about it on Fox News:

“On one hand oh how innovative, the governor of California using new media to get a message out to the voters. […] Doing something like that, by video, is something that is done by like dictators where you don’t have to answer to the people.”

And here is Jerry Brown’s Youtube announcement, where he is trying to be Stalin times Castro plus Obama combined!

We are very sure that Dana Perino, former press secretary to George W. Bush, is not at all being something so low as “partisan” or “political” when she only objects when a Democrat doesn’t take questions. In fact, this has been a longtime tactic of LIEBERALS, and that includes all stupid Roosevelt’s Fireside Chats, when no reporters were allowed to ask him questions through the radio. Dig him up and burn him, and let it be a lesson to them all!

[MediaMatters]

About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Comments

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  • nounverb911

    Dana Perino's on Youtube too, what does that make her?

    • Major Thom

      Margaret Thatcher?

    • http://www.wonkette.com Chill-A-Sketch

      An aging camwhore?

    • widestanceromance

      A dictaker.

    • http://krisbunda.com/blog/index.php Designer_Rants

      A cunt?

      • proudgrampa

        I agree.

    • Crank_Tango

      all of um, katie?

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Stupider than a Faux

    • Callyson

      What Rush Limbaugh said?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Blond?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        A dumb blonde. Dumb enough, even, to catch the notice of Faux News.

    • bikerlaureate

      As consistent as any other media-whore Republican?

  • ChernobylSoup

    You lost her at "Castro."

    • nounverb911

      They make convertibles, right?

    • SorosBot

      I thought that was one of the most, ah, "San Francisco-y" neighborhoods of San Francisco.

  • Barb

    "Doing something like that, by video, is something that is done by like dictators where you don’t have to answer to the people.”

    As Bush's former Press Secretary, she should be used to not having to answer to the people. They could just tap our phones and find out how we felt about anything.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Much like requiring a loyalty oath to attend a rally.

    • FakaktaSouth

      What is up with a Press Secretary saying "Like, um, dictators" Yeah, Dana, totally grody to the max. She was in the PERFECT administration for her skill set. "Under Bush There have been, like, no terrorist attacks in like forever, oh yeah, cept that one. Whatevs."

    • Lascauxcaveman

      Here's a You Tube of a gang of four would-be tyrants dictating guidelines for the holding of hands.

      We the people have no way to answer back!

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    It's not like she's ignorant of basic history of US America including the Cuban Missile Crisis…

    Wait… whut?
    http://wonkette.com/331981/dana-perino-dumber-tha

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      God. That was 2007. So I have been reading this blog at least that long, because I remember the photo, and comments (which were since vaporized, or grew old and fell off?) included making fun of her botching the "Live Long and Prosper" sign.

  • http://www.wonkette.com Chill-A-Sketch

    Fox News always seemed like the logical career path for a blond bimbo, right-wing parrot like Dana.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Oh Dana Perino's the girl Dana.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Yea, the only boy Dana (and he pronounces it Dan-uh) is Bash

      • Exhausted66

        Does that mean Dana Rohrabacher has both man and lady parts?

  • Baconzgood

    "Now watch this drive"

    -Comander and Lunk/Co-POTUS-

    • Callyson

      Mission accomplished!

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    She was dumb and pretty as a Bushie, and her post-Bush employment merely confirms her skill-set.

    • FakaktaSouth

      Holy shit I just said the same thing, right down to the word skill set. My bad, but that confirms what we are saying I think – this bitch is an idiot who has landed in the PERFECT place for a lovely empty vessel willing to say whatever people need for her to say. BLEEEEEH. She do got some purdy skin though.

  • nounverb911

    Perino's just annoyed because her kids gave her a lump of coal for Mother's Day.

    • Jus_Wonderin

      That wasn't coal. It was coprolite .

  • Baconzgood

    It's not like politicians can lock protesters 5 miles away behind chain link fences in "freedom of speech zones" while they visit….oh.

  • skoalrebel

    Y'know, this whole social media thing is gettin' outta hand. [spit!] All these libtards makin' stupid YouTube stuff tryin' to spread some sorry message about global warming and other crap. Let's get back to the basics, like it says in the Constitution. The intertoobs are for porn (and not the fuckin' gay kind [spit!]). That's how Jesus and the other Founders intended it.

    • Baconzgood

      But what about putting a roll of mentos in a 2 liter of Dr. Pepper and exploding it?

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        Nerd porn, of course.

  • Texan_Bulldog

    Pretty sure every time Dana opens her pie hole, a unicorn gets his horn chainsawed off. Nothing like a pretty girl, dumber than dirt (see ManchuCandidate's post) who thinks she is so damn smart. (See also Palin, Sarah)

  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    if he put a giant piece of bread around his face, it would be less partisan.

    • CapnFatback

      And more artisan?

  • Mittens Howell, III

    I know how Gov. Brown feels, I sure took a lot of heat for my oppressive Dictatorial Cat Vids.

  • edgydrifter

    If only there was some way for Dana Perino to have her opinion broadcast to Americans…

  • freakishlywrong

    This ignorant twunt would know from dictators.

  • littlebigdaddy

    On a personal note, really glad now I didn't get that job at UCLA!

    • nounverb911

      Only on clear days?

  • SayItWithWookies

    Dana Perino is going to be on Jeopardy tonight. With a brain like hers, she should give famous contestant Wolf Blitzer a run for his (negative) money.

    • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

      Dana: The answer is Blue.
      Trebek: Phrase it in the form of a question.
      Dana: What is a question, Alex?"
      Trebek: What?
      Dana: What?!
      Trebek: I'm sorry, the question was what is your name?"

      • SorosBot

        Who are three people who have never been in my kitchen?

        • PuckStopsHere

          You had to go deep in the hole to come up w that one Soros, and I, for one, salute you.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Um, I'll have….no, I can't use "Potpourri," cuz that's a gateway drug….I'll take The Alphabet for….what's that number in front of the two zeroes, Alex?

      • SorosBot

        I'll take "the rapists" for $200, Alex.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          That's "Therapists", Dana….

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      Agreed. But far as famous contestants go, I'm partial to the negative capability of Anderson Cooper myself.

      • SayItWithWookies

        Anderson will be trying to redeem himself Friday. But I'm looking forward to Thursday, when aromatherapy shaman Dr. Oz faces off against noted haploid Chris Wallace.

  • Biel_ze_Bubba

    Fucking stupid Faux News is fucking stupid.
    And making American'ts fucking stupid in the process.

    • Major Thom

      Fuckin-A

    • Baconzgood

      How much does it cost to subscribe to your zine?

    • Callyson

      Well, fuckity fuck!

  • bumfug

    We need people like Dana Perino because it should be clear by now that leftist rhetoric will never incite armed revolution but just maybe the populace will grab their guns to try to make her whining stupidity stop.

  • FNMA

    See, this whole thing is just like the Cuban missile crisis when Kevin Costner built a baseball field and Mark Cuban launched missiles at it.

    Though I could be mistaken…

    • nounverb911

      "Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days."

      • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

        "You lie!" "Bull!"

    • littlebigdaddy

      Didn't the Cuban missile crisis have something to do with not importing Cuban cigars?

      • Biel_ze_Bubba

        "Sometimes a missile is just a missile."
        -John F. Kennedy

        (Kruschev was so pissed, he pounded his shoe on the U.N. lectern.)

  • Mittens Howell, III

    Two Words: Nyan Cat Death Camps!

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Watching that always makes me feel stabby

  • lowaltflier

    "Stalin times Castro plus Obama combined."

    I was never real good at algebra.

    • ChernobylSoup

      = two death panels and a free health screening.

    • DeathOfIrony

      There is an implied parenthesis around Stalin and Castro, also, you need to square it by 9/11 to normalize it. Go to another forum if you want it converted to metric.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Dictator, huh? I'm visualizing her wearing a Sacha Baron Cohen beard.

    • mavenmaven

      on her face?

  • Mittens Howell, III

    Two Dana Perinos, one cup.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      of brains.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Dana Perino always looks like she has barbed wire in her panties.

    • Nostrildamus

      OK, let's all take a moment to ponder Dana's panties.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "Doing something like that, by video, is something that is done by like dictators where you don’t have to answer to the people."

    Next up, FOX's blistering exposè on Jerry Brown's rape rooms.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Or his lack of rape rooms, contravening U.S. Immigration/Terrorism Law.

    • bikerlaureate

      She was just as hard on Republicans "suspending" their campaigns via YouTube… no, wait…

  • Sir_Fartz_Alot

    please remind me what were her qualifications?

    • widestanceromance

      She can hold her breath for a long time and she talks really fast.

    • nounverb911

      None, so she's perfect for Fox.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Somewhere south of her neck and north of her belt.

      Oh, WHAT were her qualifications? I thought you asked "where"….

      • Jus_Wonderin

        That is good because she needs reference points on the map to be able to comb her hair.

    • yrbmegr

      She used the qualifier "like" when referring to dictators. That's all I got.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      Blonde.

  • FakaktaSouth

    Oh my God yes, Dana, tell me all about using video propaganda to communicate lies and evil in an attempt to control people from your perch at Fox Fucking News.
    These people do not see themselves. At all.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      I always figured Ailes had no reflection in a mirror … you think it's that way for all of 'em?

  • Chichikovovich

    Dana Perino. Dana Perino….. Oh yeah! Now I remember. She's the person who said on air in 2008 that there had been no terrorist attacks under Bush. Apparently she forgot to Never Forget.

    How could someone that dim get a job at Fox? A puzzlement.

    • http://sciencekick.blogspot.com valthemus

      Asking and answering your own questions is the height of efficiency.

  • RedneckMuslin

    It's amazing that someone from the Bush administration has the balls to look down on someone else's fiscal plan.

  • Generation[redacted]

    LEAVE DANA PLATO ALONE!!!!11!

  • prommie

    Fascist dictator communist is ripping up our constitushinz!

  • CapnFatback

    Perino's right. Traditionally, a governor makes these sort of announcements in handed paper note form:

    Do you like these budget changes? (check one)
    ☐ Yes
    ☐ No
    ☐ Maybe
    ☐ Dana Perino would suck Newt off for a charge account at Target

    • Jus_Wonderin

      I keep clicky, clicky but nothin' happens!

      • Callyson

        "OK, then, the machines work just as we wanted them to. Deliver them to the polls."

        -Diebold

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    So, Dana Peirno and Jello Biafra: Separated at Birth?

  • rickmaci

    Call me when Dana Perino posts a video of herself on YouPorn. Otherwise, her mouth is pretty much useless.

  • http://sciencekick.blogspot.com valthemus

    My mother was a dictator for making me eat carrots.

    Nigella Lawson is a dictator for making me want to buy expensive herbs and jams.

    Eric Cantor is a wannabe dictator and a dick.

  • SorosBot

    Nope, Gov. Brown doesn't have to answer to the people, who didn't overwhelmingly put him into office over a failed CEO.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Isn't the whole point behind electing representatives that we *trust* them to do stuff in our best interests?

  • mavenmaven

    Fox News: Random Hateful Stuff 24/7

  • Callyson

    Snark off–

    Redistricting gives CA voters a real chance to elect a 2/3 Democratic majority in the legislature and get around the R – word 2/3 majority vote required for votes on taxes. Golden State residents, get off your asses and vote this November!

    • http://oliphantparts.org/ natoslug

      I promise to vote early and vote often.

  • Callyson

    Doing something like that, by video, is something that is done by like dictators where you don’t have to answer to the people

    Yeah–Governor Brown should have discussed this matter in a quiet room. That's a much better way for the people to hold their elected leaders accountable.

    Idiot.

  • MissTaken

    “On one hand oh how innovative, the governor of California using new media to get a message out to the voters. […] Doing something like that, by video, is something that is done by like dictators where you don’t have to answer to the people.”

    She's right! Me no understand this World Wide Interwebbing, MeTubey stuff. I always mess up when I be typing the htp;\wwww.comm. Never can figure it out. Guess Moonbeam a dictator after all!

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    I see the video with the old guy, but where is the one with Jerry Brown?

  • el_donaldo

    I read this, and I'm thinking, who in media is so ignorant of the basic dynamics of mass communication. Only someone who went to college for a communications degree could be this witless.

    So I checked the Wikipedia entry, and, what was Perino's major? Communications. Most pointless degree ever.

    • Wile E. Quixote

      Communications degrees are for people who are too stupid to major in English, and as far as English degrees go, well, from my sad dating experience a lot of women who major in English are completely fucking insane.

      • el_donaldo

        Yes, I am married to one. Crazy smart. Also crazy.

    • MosesInvests

      MBA libel!

  • MissTaken

    Yes Dana, the very definition of a dictator is someone who has the citizens of their state vote on increasing their taxes instead of just doing it on their own. You are very smart.

  • Mahousu

    Dana is right. Ronald Reagan, after all, got to be known as the "Great Communicator" because he was essentially Hitler.

    Well, more like Mussolini, to be honest. Except for that "trains running on time" bit; he had no use for that.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Reagan had a computer on his desk in the Oval Office, and he never turned it on even once! That's how democracy works, my friends.

  • CommieLibunatic

    Oh, shut your fucking mouth, you amnesiac bimbo. You wouldn't know a true dictator if he personally sowed a yellow star onto your jacket.

    Sorry for the snarkless outburst. Family is being a bunch of fundamentalist idiots who don't deserve opposable thumbs, and I'm stuck with few outlets. That, and Dana Perino is dumber than cement poured by a teabagger.

    • Exhausted66

      Teabagger?
      Don't mind if I do.

  • http://www.gurukalehuru.wordpress.com gurukalehuru

    Note to Dana Peritoneum, YouTube is not really considered "new media" any more.

  • Wile E. Quixote

    Which stupid blonde Fox cunt is Dana Perino? I get them all confused. As a public service someone should offer a set of "know your lying conservative cunts" trading cards so you could keep them straight, especially the blonde ones, Coulter, Megyn Kelly, Perino, etc.

  • randcoolcatdaddy

    I didn't realize it was time for the Two Minute Hate on Fox News already.

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    I bet there is a lady named Dana Schwartz.

  • ElPinche

    I see Dana finally went full Megyn Kelly.

  • V572 Is this him?

    Time was, every time Perino would get on the teevee for saying something stupid, I'd think, "She's so pretty…"

    Even that'snot working for her anymore, sadly.

    • el_donaldo

      Now that we have January Jones, what do we need with Dana Perino?

  • Dildeaux

    So may "likes" she sounds like a freakin 15 year old valley girl.

  • mormos

    "Here is Dana Perino, blahing about it on Fox News:"

    I find that racist!

  • OneYieldRegular

    Yes, god forbid any politician should attempt to use "new media" in any way. They'll probably break the whole internet or something, you know, by accidentally disconnecting the "You" tube from the series of tubes that keeps it all working.

  • Come here a minute

    Seems like this violates the YouTube terms and conditions — saying you're gonna tax the hell out of YouTube billionaires.

  • crybabyboehner

    I forgot the rules. Are we allowed to call her a you-know-what?

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Betty Draper is so petty! When will it get through her blonde noggin that she is not married to the U.S. anymore?!

  • elburritodeluxe

    Hey, look! It's George W. Bush's Leni Riefenstahl here to tell us how Democrats are the real dictators!

  • mileslarboy

    She's STILL making Al Gore/Internet jokes? WTF???

  • Birdwatcher1

    Perino is unbelievable. She looks like an android – NOTHING on that face is moving. You have to feel sorry for the Foxlets – they all go blond and pulled the minute they get signed on. She is no longer pretty as she once was.

    That said, she's never had a working brain. What a bimbo.

  • PuckStopsHere

    Yeah, Dana. Like Al Gore would take your call.

  • ttommyunger

    No snark: Dana Perino is one of the dumbest white women on the planet, period.

    • George Spelvin

      Aha, you are almost as late to this thread as I.

      Also, you are absolutely correct. If this twint hadn't once been sorta cute, she'd get as much media attention as a checkout clerk at the dollar store.

      • ttommyunger

        Yeah, sorta cute in the “C'mon, I'll only put the head of it in” way.

  • MRjonz

    Lil' Dana, yet another Republican graciously appointed to a cushy board position by Obama (Broadcasting Board of Governors) who regularly stabs him in the back, was on a special edition of “Jeopardy Power Players” broadcast from D.C. last night, and lost it all because she couldn't come up with the answer "Guggenheim Museum." And she lives and works in New York. ‘Nuff said.