New Poll: Majority of North Carolina Voters More Idiotic Than Previously Thought

  start drinking

So THIS is how Virginia Foxx happened.

Your Wonkette editor was happily trawling polling data on her Friday afternoon — how else do you get a wild weekend started — when she belatedly noticed a fun head-scratcher in a recent Public Policy Polling item about the upcoming vote on North Carolina’s Amendment One, which would add a ban on same-sex marriage and civil unions to the state constitution. Ready for what the polling revealed? You may need to read this twice: “55% of voters in the state support some form of legal recognition for gay couples in the form of either marriage or civil unions to only 41% completely opposed. But at the same time 55% of voters plan to support the amendment that would prohibit any legal recognition for same sex couples while only 41% are opposed.” Did you notice that, how the second thing does not seem to follow from the first? Why is this? Do not think any harder than the majority of North Carolinians about the answer.

It’s just plain old classic stupidity:

The problem for opponents is that only 40% of voters actually know that the amendment bans both gay marriage and civil unions. With those voters the amendment is failing by a 60-38 margin. But with voters who think all the amendment does is ban gay marriage, 27% of the electorate, it’s passing by a 72-27 margin. And with voters who admit they don’t actually know what the amendment does, 26% of the electorate, it leads by a 64-28 margin.

(Our bold.)

Don’t you just need a shot now, or fifty? See, wild weekend underway already. [PPP]

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306 comments

    1. glamourdammerung

      Actually, SCOTUS forced them too, but they did change the law in 1977, one year before Mormons decided black folks "repented" and were now people too.

      1. Chichikovovich

        Alabama didn't get around to voting down, in a referendum, it's anti-interracial marriage laws until 2000. And even then, 40% voted to retain the laws.

          1. LionHeartSoyDog

            I am pretty, oh so pretty,
            but not in the same way you are, glamdamm.
            Best Wishes.

            (lilgreenfootballz is one of the most vile sites around. Am not willing to investigate further).

          2. Fukui-sanYesOta

            There used to be a quiz (sadly taken down) where it was "LGF commenters talking about Muslims or actual Nazi quote?"

            Stuff like this:

            "Nature is cruel; therefore we are also entitled to be cruel… Should I not also have the right to eliminate millions of an inferior race that multiplies like vermin?"

            "I am obeying the highest law by doing my duty. Man must defend himself against bedbugs and rats — against vermin."

            "Our superiority, militarily and morally, to these vermin is so overwhelming that it would go without saying, were it not for the daily shrieking of the… press."

            "I've been fond of transfer of these subhuman[s] for a while. Perhaps something more like targeted genocide… will become necessary."

            "They don't need statehood; they need sterilization."

            It was really hard to tell.

          3. glamourdammerung

            I am not sure what LGF has to do with my somehow managing to forget to put the word "sure" in my earlier post here. Especially since I have only read posts there rarely and do not comment there.

          4. Fukui-sanYesOta

            Your blog link references LGF on the hover-over, which I think is what LHSD was talking about.

          5. glamourdammerung

            That makes more sense. I was thinking I might have been confused with someone else. But yes, I thought the link was a pretty good example of how Breitards "function".

          6. Fukui-sanYesRadio

            Heh, we've all seen your posts and I don't think anyone would mistake you for one of those virulently vicious LGF commentators!

        1. Puffperney

          Another amazing coincidence occurred when God told the mormon president that polygamy was no longer OK when the U.S. required the abolition of polygamy as a prerequisite for Utah to become a state.

        2. Negropolis

          This is one thing that bothers me about Mormonism so much. It's so incredibly cynical. It's not like other religions that had to change their views through centuries of literal battle and strife, which itself is bad enough.

    1. Chow Yun Flat

      I not only saw what you did there but I only had to think about it for a second. If I was from North Carolina I would still be trying to figure it out.

    2. tessiee

      Meh, Research Triangle Park has a branch of the Cato Institute, so they're no great shakes.

  1. edgydrifter

    Voting for constitutional amendments you know nothing about–that's conservative!

    1. CapnFatback

      The problem is, the poison that their votes cause lasts far longer than any fart.

  2. Ayn Rand Paul Tard

    You say this new law will require I amputate the nose from my face and leave a gaping hole? But I get to stick it to the gays (not literally, obvs!)? Works for me! YEE HAW!!!

  3. ttommyunger

    Slowing progress is just like trying to push a rope up the street: in the end, they will just wind up sweaty and looking stupid. Sadly, lots of folk will be hurt in the process, but the times are leaving these folk behind with their dicks in the dirt, and it can't happen soon enough to please me.

    1. Biel_ze_Bubba

      "There continues to be a massive generational gap with seniors (60/36) strongly in support of the amendment and young voters (33/59) strongly opposed."

      So, yeah. We may just have to wait for the ignorant old fuckwads to die off.

      1. ttommyunger

        As an old fuckwad, I say Amen! I'm like the hunter that caught the Racoon by the tail in a tree, “Just shoot up here, one of us needs some relief!”

  4. MissTaken

    I just had to strong margaritas for lunch. I'm sure I am now qualified to vote in NC.

          1. Lascauxcaveman

            Probably be too lazy (exhausted) to make them up afterwards. I'll probably need assistance just to uncap my beers.

          2. Lascauxcaveman

            I haven't ridden that far in one shot in over 30 years. But the only hard part (the first 8 miles, on this route) I do about once a week. So I think I'll survive. I forced myself to ride every day the weather allowed this winter, so I actually stayed in pretty good shape.

    1. Fare la Volpe

      Wait until you drill down into Vagina Foxxx's district

      I am so glad you did not say "hole."

  5. SayItWithWookies

    Wait — find out about something before you make an important decision about it? Sounds like sex education to me.

  6. HippieEsq

    This math checks out to me. But I'm a lawyer, AND HIGH AS A KITE (and a little drinky too, hello Friday). So what do I know.

    1. Negropolis

      This is down-right scary, then, because North Carolina is the "smart" Carolina.

    2. tessiee

      "An informed voter? Boy, you must be thinking of some other Carolina."

      Certainly not South.

  7. WhatTheHeck

    Goddammed poll asking multiple questions. Too confusing.
    One question per poll please!

  8. SorosBot

    Gah, now I do need a drink. But I don't have any alcohol and can't really afford any, dammit.

    1. MissTaken

      Sorry. Yet ANOTHER reason you need to move your happy ass here. I'm drowning in tequila!

      1. SorosBot

        Could you send some over here?

        And yes, I will be happy once we're no longer 2,500 miles apart.

        1. Texan_Bulldog

          Are you two really dating? I knew of a couple who met on teh Wonkette but it was a long time ago & I don't remember their handles or even know if they are still together.

          1. MissTaken

            Yes, we really are. He came out here in Feb and I was out in Philly a couple of weeks ago. We're so cute together it's disgusting!

          2. Texan_Bulldog

            How cute is that?! How did that transpire since you don't have access to real names or email addresses?

          3. MissTaken

            Thanks!

            SorosBot sucked it up and posted his email addy deep on some Santorum thread back in January. We've been talking daily ever since.

          4. DustBowlBlues

            That's insufferable darling. What hasn't anyone sent me hidden messages of love? No one around here even seems to love me. Maybe it's being 64 arthritic and having the old man and his porn mentioned on virtually every comment stream I offer my two cents on. Oops–underemployed wonket English major sitting in mom's basement, having raided Dad's liquor cabinet who is now raving, pissed off drunk.

            What was I talking about? I got carried away finishing up with the beginning of a short story, and now I've forgott—

            Oh, I remember. It had to do with ending a sentence with a proposition and kind of wandered off for a while.

          5. Chichikovovich

            The Old Man and his Porn — that was one of Hemingway's edgier stories.

          6. DustBowlBlues

            And that, sir, is my laugh out loud moment at the end of a long day. Thanks.

          7. Fare la Volpe

            underemployed wonket English major sitting in mom's basement, having raided Dad's liquor cabinet who is now raving, pissed off drunk.

            YOU DON'T HAVE TO GET PERSONAL.

            <bawls>

          8. Spurning Beer

            A proposition is a terrible thing to end a sentence with.

            I mean, a proposition is a terrible thing to end a sentence with, so let's make out.

          9. Biff

            Uh, because you're always yammering about having an ol' man? Otherwise, you're the perfect woman!

          10. HistoriCat

            Oh sure, Music Maker seems like a good cause but what relationship do they have with the Uzbekistan leadership? And how much are they doing to oppose abortion?

          11. BelleSC

            The Carolina Chocolate Drops won a Grammy in 2010 in the Best Traditional Folk Album category for their album, "Genuine Negro Jig."

            "On the album, the multi-instrumental group reclaims and revives a near-forgotten brand of banjo-driven string-band music from North Carolina’s Piedmont region, and doing so, says the Boston Globe, with 'a contagious, abundant joy.' "

            From the nonesuch.com website.

          12. SorosBot

            Yes, we are; we have been since January or February, depending on if you count from when we first started talking privately or when we first met each other. And MissTaken is even smarter, cuter and funnier in real life than she is here.

          13. Texan_Bulldog

            Awww….such a sweetie. Good luck to you both & I want to be invited to the wedding or the abortion–whichever comes first!

          14. DustBowlBlues

            I never even noticed the two of you flirting. That's what I get for not having time to wonkette-up my dull life.

          15. FakaktaSouth

            I am just busting up in here to say what up Sor-ken and I love when I actually am one of the cool kids that already knew about this from way back. Now I need a tshirt "that proves you were there, that you heard of them first." Mazel Tov.

          16. SorosBot

            I do like the "Sor-ken" name for us; the only better name I can think of uses our real names, that one works well

          17. glamourdammerung

            I would refrain from posting your real name and contact info if I were you unless you really want "witty" prank calls and impotent death threats from Breitbart's flying monkey brigade.

      2. Steverino247

        Personal ad:

        "Cute woman with plenty of tequila has need for happy ass in San Francisco. Likes SorosBots."

        Put your shoes on and start walking, brother!

    2. Chichikovovich

      Man, things are screwed up in this country. You can't get something to drink even though you could use it, while I could go out and get a drink right now…. but I don't drink! Where's the logic in that? Huh?

      Clearly Obama's fault.

    3. Texan_Bulldog

      I was watching 'Intervention' one night & this woman alcoholic was so bad off (her family had ditched all the liquor in the house) she drank mouthwash & strained Isopropyl alcohol through a paper towel. So, if you need a quick buzz head to your bathroom. (Snark off: that show is so incredibly sad, esp. when the majority of those filmed end up using again. One of my top 3 wishes for my kids is that they never suffer that level of addiction to anything.)

      1. BigSkullF*ckingDog

        " strained Isopropyl alcohol through a paper towel."

        I'm not much of a chemist compared to a couple of my colleagues, but this offends even me with its stupidity.

      2. SorosBot

        That sounds like the time Uncle Tom Hanks was desperate enough to drink the Keaton's vanilla extract, because that has alcohol in it, leading Alex to realize that he was an alcoholic. And fuck that's sad.

        1. DustBowlBlues

          I was thinking Days of Wine And Roses, I do not know the movie you menitoned. Or whatever.

        2. Chichikovovich

          [No snark] A friend of mine in Winnipeg worked the graveyard shift in a 7-11 located in one of the rougher parts of the city, which at the time was the center of the local skid road, as well as an area that was the heart of a recently sprung-up Filipino community. After midnight, almost all his customers were either Filipinos getting off of late work or "rubbies" as we called them in Canada (a reference to rubbing alcohol). His blackly humorous joke was that every client was of either Manila extraction or vanilla extraction. That 7-11 branch was the only thing open for miles around at that time of night, and so it was the only resort for the desperate. They had to put mouthwash behind the counter, then shoe polish, then Aqua Velva after-shave,… The job was a lesson in just how many household products contain enough alcohol to give someone a buzz.

          1. DemmeFatale

            My legendary, once glamorously beautiful Aunt drank all the perfume she could find in her (desperately) cleaned out house.
            (I guess the vanilla and after-shave reminded me of that,)
            *sigh*

          2. Chichikovovich

            That's really a tragic story. My heart goes out to her, and to the people ike you who loved her.

          3. user-of-owls

            Shampoo. You forgot shampoo. And licking the sweat off yourself in the hopes of catching some of the good stuff just seeping right the hell out of you.

            One more fun fact: if you're a souse that's hiding it from your spouse (you louse), disposal of the evidence becomes an issue, as does finding a place to pour the cheapest shit you can buy down your throat. In this, I found, Walmart is your friend. Parking lots are off road and not a damn soul watches you. Except the other drunks doing the same thing. Our minds think alike. Then once you finishing the swill, you go round back and toss the empty bottle in the dumpster. Don't even need to get out of your car.

            This is why sots make great CIA/FBI types. We are extremely crafty.

      3. Fare la Volpe

        I worked at a homeless shelter in Asheville during my fall and winter breaks in high school, and two of the things all residents had to check at the door were mouthwash and (not kidding) rubbing alcohol. Homeless people would buy those and drink them straight because they couldn't buy booze, then suffer acute alcohol poisoning and either pass out or die before anyone could get them help. Some of the drinkers would burn their throats so badly that they would close up and suffocate them. It was awful.

        Alcoholism was never funny to me after I heard those stories.

      4. ColonelDoctor

        The alcohol in rubbing alcohol is a toxic isomer. It isn't for ingestion. Isopropyl alcohol, methyl alcohol and the like will kill you. People can only drink ethyl alcohol. That is why people die sometimes from moonshine; it isn't precisely distilled and you get the bad isomers. Hence "triple-distilled" and the like.

  9. anniegetyerfun

    how else do you get a wild weekend started

    1. Flavored lube
    2. Alpaca
    3. ?
    4. Profit!

        1. Steverino247

          Let me correct that personals ad…

          Personal ad:

          "Cute woman with plenty of tequila has need for happy ass and labia ballot punching in San Francisco. Likes SorosBots."

          Road trip!

          1. Steverino247

            I think we should take up a collection or something to help you move out there to SFO. I'll talk to the Editrix about it on Thursday. 8)

      1. BigSkullF*ckingDog

        Nothing in the world has ever needed more Pat Buchanan. It doesn't exist.

  10. Mojopo

    If only the gays would add a child beating amendment, something North Carolina people can use and enjoy, they might get civil unions. Without an opportunity to whip, smack or mash little kids, I just don't see how this will get through.

    1. Mojopo

      What in the sam hill are these durn Yankees going to marry next? A calculator I bet! Go to Californee, hippie queer, and take yer adding machine boyfriend with you! We don't cotton to no numbers round here!

  11. Redhead

    If your head isn't sore from banging it against the wall yet…

    I saw this commercial last night. I am not making this up.
    "Everyone gay or straight is free to live as they choose, but no one has the right to redefine marriage." (set to the image of a bible, right after talking about how GOD defined marriage IN THE BIBLE before NC was a state).
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPY5mZt6aL8

    1. jodyleek

      Doesn't the bible have several references to men having multiple wives? Where does it say in the bible that marriage is only between one man and one woman? The wedding at Canaan could have been for a guy who already had a bevy of dames. Seriously. I mean, I know I'm drunk but I think these fuckers are just making shit up.

      1. Redhead

        You're not that drunk – they are. (And they're trying to frame it as a freedom of religion issue – as in my freedom to impose my shit head views on anyone who disagrees)

        1. jodyleek

          They are all Liars for Jesus! Read Chris Rodda's book – lots of gory detail (not blood and guts – scholarly) but fascinating.

  12. EtchySketchy

    Fine illustration of the 'Trickle-Up Theory Of Stupidity" as we watch the dumbness rise from South Carolina.

  13. Doktor StrangeZoom

    A majority of Americans also support the Administration's policy toward Freedonia.

      1. flamingpdog

        Is it just me, or does the clown at 0:16 look like Saddam Hussein? And I have had a drop of alcohol tonight, neither?

    1. tessiee

      This was best expressed in an editorial cartoon in "The Daily Tar Heel", circa 1994, where the following words were written in a circle:
      "There are a lot of bible thumpers here, so we don't have a state lottery, so the schools are underfunded and terrible, so our kids grow up stupid, so there are a lot of bible thumpers here…"

  14. bikerlaureate

    Another great opportunity for a favorite of mine…

    Josh: 68 percent think we're giving too much in foreign aid and 59 percent think it should be cut.
    Will: You like that stat.
    Josh: I do.
    Will: Why?
    Josh: Because 9 percent think it's too high and shouldn't be cut!! Nine percent of the respondents couldn't fully get their arms around the question.

  15. Guppy

    Direct democrat action by morons…

    I just realized! North Carolina has become California!

    1. Fukui-sanYesOta

      California had proposition R which, sadly, didn't pass.

      "Shall the City change the name of the Oceanside Water Pollution Control Plant to the George W Bush Sewage Plant?"

  16. Monsieur_Grumpe

    What do expect from the state where Forest Gump talks too fast for 76% of the population?

  17. CommieLibunatic

    Discarding this poll from my memory. My weekend forecast is already looking stressful.

  18. sullivanst

    Since North Carolina's state constitution already defines marriage as between a man and a woman, and since North Carolina state law already bans same-sex marriage, the "fuck you you can't have any rights at all" amendment appears to be a gilded invitation for Anthony Kennedy to go all Romer v Evans on their asses.

  19. Antispandex

    This isn't really that hard to understand. See, there is no "C" option. One of my friends back when I was in the Navy was from there and he said when he didn't know an answer he always picked "C". So, obviously, the entire state has switched to "A". You have to be a good test taker to get these things, I guess. I was always studying and try to get the correct answer….I know, dumb. Well, at least I'm not a homophobe! That's something.

  20. OneYieldRegular

    As a North Carolina native who spent the first 18 years of my life in the state, might I offer a quiet bit of sage advice to others similarly situated?

    GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE!

  21. Fairtackle

    I was going to defend NC by saying that Charlestons is a really nice town, but…

  22. OldWhiteLies

    I'd like a list of volunteers to place giant Mr. Yuck stickers on all the Welcome to North Carolina signs.

    It only seems fair to the rest of the planet.

    1. MissTaken

      Answer:

      This President's stick is so big Air Force One must refuel every 1,000 miles due to the extra weight.

  23. ifthethunderdontgetya

    And with voters who admit they don’t actually know what the amendment does, 26% of the electorate, it leads by a 64-28 margin.

    (Our bold.)

    Let's get that chant goin', beaches.

    USA! USA! USA!
    ~

  24. Negropolis

    Something similar happened with Michigan's gay marriage ban in that it didn't just outlaw same-sex marriage rights, but was so broadly written that even unmarried opposite-sex partnerships were deemed null, as well as other kinds of familial domestic situations. Then, after it was passed, everyone claimed they didn't realize it did that, too.

    1. horsedreamer_1

      Except all the moral midgets in Michigan Dutch Country who proclaimed: "WINNING!"

    2. Chichikovovich

      I have rarely been as angry about anything in politics as I was about that referendum. It wasn't just that people "didn't realize" that it would go that far – the anti-gay marriage forces were actively encouraging that impression. I still remember the incessant robocalls we were getting – "It's about marriage, not about benefits" over and over again. When people pointed out that the language was so ridiculously broad it could be used to force the University of Michigan to stop offering health insurance to same-sex domestic partners of employees, the proponents of the proposition said the worriers were engaging in "scare tactics".

      The Attorney general (I think it was Mike Cox, but if not it was some other Calvinist wacko) kept pretty quiet about the whole thing. Then within days of the proposition passing, he filed suit to prevent the U of M from offering domestic partner benefits. The haste made it clear that the case had been prepared and strategized long before. And, of course, he won, because the language was that broad. [U of M has some smart lawyers around campus, as it happens, and they found a way around the decision and brought back the benefits in a way that satisfied the letter of the law, but the forces of obsessive theocracy have been fighting tooth and nail to stop them.]

      When thinking about it now I am choking with fury. You expect a certain level of dishonesty in politics, but it was staggering to see playing out before my eyes the sheer barefaced lying about the effect the proposition would have, when having that effect was precisely what the bill was crafted to do.

      Tabernak, it is things like this that make it clear to me how beneath contempt these people are, as well as frightening. And I make sure to have my Canadian passport up-to-date.

      1. Negropolis

        It was Mike Cox. But, just to be clear, like the governor and senate majority leader and the lt. governor and (fill in blank of prominent, Michigan politician), he is a Catholic.

        1. Chichikovovich

          Ah – thanks for the correction. He's a wacko, but not the precise flavor of wacko I had believed.

          1. Negropolis

            Yeah, the West Michigan Calvinists (i.e. the so-called "Dutch Mafia".) know that the only way they even have a chance of winning any statewide race in Michigan is to ally with the Southeast Michigan Catholics.

            The Southeast Michigan Catholics, though, are a swingy bunch dependent upon the year and the issue being voted on in the way the westside extremists will never be. They are the folks that gave Jennifer Granholm a second term, and allowed medical marijuana and stem celll research margins of support of 60% . They are also the idiots that elected Engler and passed the gay marriage ban.

      2. Boojum

        You should have seen Georgia pass a sovereign immunity amendment. The ballot question was written as if it was giving citizens the right to sue the State, when the Amendment did the exact opposite.

      3. George Spelvin

        Well, if he was a Calvinist, he didn't really have any choice, did he?

        BTW, one of the lesser benefits to me of your participation in teh Wonkette (the major ones include your extraordinarily broad range of knowledge and crystalline logic) is that you have introduced all of us to sacres.

  25. Negropolis

    BTW, America is the very best example against compulsory voting.

    So, when do we put up the reintroduction of race-based chattel slavery?

    1. anniegetyerfun

      Also: "Studies show that close to 70% of Americans don't own passports, causing the rest of the world to breathe a sigh of relief."

      1. Fukui-sanYesOta

        "I am not an advocate for frequent changes in laws and constitutions. But laws and institutions must go hand in hand with the progress of the human mind. As that becomes more developed, more enlightened, as new discoveries are made, new truths discovered and manners and opinions change, with the change of circumstances, institutions must advance also to keep pace with the times. We might as well require a man to wear still the coat which fitted him when a boy as civilized society to remain ever under the regimen of their barbarous ancestors."

        I think I've played this game with you before.

  26. Numbat_Dundee

    So here's my plan. Propose an amendment to the North Carolina constitution that a certain visiting Australian with a marsupial nom de plume be given large wads of cash and/or complimentary blow jobs from the comelier inhabitants of the state if and when he should choose to visit. Frame the proposal in words of more than one syllable and watch as the "don't know what it means but I'll vote for it anyway" demographic push it into the "Yes" column. Then collect.
    Of course I'd have to visit North Carolina…

    1. Fukui-sanYesOta

      Of course I'd have to visit North Carolina…

      Proposition Numbat, Clause 2.3g

      All aforementioned fellatio from Clause 2.3b shall be consummated at a locale determined by the eponymous party of the amendment and at the expense of the fellator.

      See? Easy.

      1. Boojum

        And "comelier" might be too vague. I would at least specify the number of extremities and teeth.

  27. C_R_Eature

    26% of the N.C. electorate's Thought Balloon, voting day:

    "I'm a Moron and this is my Wife
    She's frosting a cake with a paper knife…"

      1. Radiotherapy

        I think it's more like North America is the smart America. And Central America is the red headed step child.

        1. emmelemm

          "North America is the smart America"

          Mmm. I'm not too sure about that. Maybe if you'd said North America is one of the top three Americas, I'd believe it. (Not including America Ferrera.)

    1. Radiotherapy

      At least they don't have Pedro's South of the Border, well, except the fucking billboards every fucking 1/2 mile.

  28. tessiee

    You know, just in case they were getting too smug because *south* carolina has "South of the Border".

      1. tessiee

        Also, Jesus vs. Godjira came up with the same "pay me money bill" idea as numbat dundee.

        Great minds, same gutter, yadda yadda yadda.

      1. SorosBot

        A Nazi murder/suicide – who tried (luckily incompetently) to make it look like he, and all the family members he killed, including the year-and-a-half-old baby, were killed instead by angry Mexicans. Fuck that story is infuriating.

        1. Fukui-sanYesOta

          Don't forget good old Shawna Forde, who felt it her duty to shoot messicans because, um, whatever.

          "Raul and Brisenia Flores, who died, as well as Gina Gonzalez, who survived, were all natural-born U.S. citizens."

          She and her Aryan-nation buddies shot a 9-year-old girl as she begged for her life.

          1. user-of-owls

            She and her Aryan-nation buddies shot a 9-year-old girl as she begged for her life.

            It was the Christian thing to do, don't you know.

          2. Fukui-sanYesOta

            Yeah, because fuck knows those messicans aren't Christian. Probably Zoroastrian or something.

          3. Radiotherapy

            hey bitch, guess who has to go sober? but you know what? tx to you and Dewey, I figure I can do it as well. wish luck upon me, my ulto-avian friend. actually, when you guys were in the midst july of '11 or so, i had cut down, but now the party is over. i just wanted you to know.
            and fukui, this is a tough time for me too, so if in a few days you guys don't see me for awhile, you'll know why.

          4. Fukui-sanYesRadio

            My friend, I know what you're going through and I've been cutting back myself because I've admitted that I have a problem too.

            Good luck to you and my best wishes. I will be thinking of you.

            edit: Solidarity.

          5. user-of-owls

            And to you, dear Fukui, solidaridad y abrazos a ti. Embrace happiness even though it isn't easy, feel wonder when all is dark. Miracles happen.

          6. user-of-owls

            You do our genus proud, you crested sweetheart you. And we're here to talk for you. Always. ;)

            I think we're nearing critical mass here! And Dewey started it off by having the courage to talk about his first steps right here around 10 months ago. Hooray for us!

          7. starfanglednut

            Ha ha we should have a sober wonkette meet up. Can you imagine? We'd have to make up for the lack of alcohol with buttsecks, lots and lots of buttsecks.

          8. user-of-owls

            Wow.
            Huau.
            Wao.

            Can't tell you how proud I am. We're here, all of us. Welcome on board the HMS Sobrio.

          9. Radiotherapy

            abrazos, pero no besos, mi amigo. srsly, I am not looking forward to this, right now it's the nausea/anxiety that gets me in the morning, but I can't tell you and Dewey enough how you inspire me. In fact I am going to go read those threads again.

          10. not that Dewey

            I left you some anxiety/nausea Hints from Heloise on an older thread. I hope that helps.

          11. user-of-owls

            Ginger for the stomach, meditation (if you work at it a bit) for los nervios.

            Once the minutes get easier, the hours get easier, once the hours get easier, the days get easier; the days get easier, the years get easier. And then you win. Huzzah!

          12. Biff

            Jesus christ, what a bunch of quitters we've become.
            23 years here, but who's counting…

          13. Radiotherapy

            I've been reading those threads from last summer where Dewey and Owls fessed up and our community rallied around them. And, more importantly, how they handled their "transition" to sobriety. I'm hoping later tonight we can all talk again — on the cinco de mayo thread? My counselor called it a disease of isolation, and probably it's a lot more subtle than that for me, but I guess i am a anti-social socialist to some degree.

          14. Biff

            Who knew this joint could be supportive or inspirational? Hope I can catch up later, on my way out for some live music and coffee. Such a place now exists nearby, apparently.

          15. user-of-owls

            Who knew this joint could be supportive or inspirational

            Me. Dewey. Radio. Fukui. You want I should continue? It's a beautifully long list. And growing.

          16. Radiotherapy

            As I said my fine feathered friend, I went back and read a great thread from July 29? last year. Hell, you were even cordial with our favorite harpy. I used a trick you and someone mentioned at a 5 May party tonite. I brought a can of Vernor's Ginger Ale and put it on a little ice. Fuckin' 48 hrs. ago I didn't even conceive sobriety was possible. I've got to go to rehab in a few days. ; (
            But all you brilliant MFer's will help me get through this.
            Does anybody know how to get to on Dewey's OG thread on July 4th or so other than clicking through 400-500 of your Int debate comments?

          17. SayItWithWookies

            Radio, you and your sober friends make me ashamed to be an awful human being. Not really — but best of success and perseverance to you.

          18. not that Dewey

            Right there with you, buddy. I fell, and then I got up, and owls helped me AGAIN (really above and beyond, that guy). Now my watch is synchronized with yours.

          19. Designer_Radio

            but I guess i am a anti-social socialist to some degree.

            I believe I know EXACTLY what you mean. Also, good job for initiating this. I've been sober 2 yrs now. Eventually you'll find something else to occupy your time.

          20. starfanglednut

            Radio,

            Mumbletypeg suggested that I could reach you by replying to one of your posts. I want you to know that I've been where you are, and anything I can do to help, I will. Just say the word. I know this is a hard time, but I promise you, it really is the beginning of a new life. I will forward my email to Rebecca. Perhaps she can get it to you. Everyone here at teh wonkette is pulling for you.

            sfn

          21. CapnFatback

            VayaconDoritos, my friend. In lieu of raising a glass, come to the Wonk and raise a p-score.

          22. MittBorg

            Hey, Radio. It's been a while, and I've missed you, guy. Hope things are working out for ya. Please let us know as and when you can how you're doing. You know where to find me, if you ever want to talk.

          23. not that Dewey

            I had written a smart-ass email to the Minutemen/Jim Gilchrist in the wake of the Shawna Forde trial, something about the Minutemen should amend their "code of ethics" to include shooting 9-year-old girls in the face. He was not amused. He decided to show me what's what by accusing me of child molestation, and then spamming me with 400 racist Minutemen emails every day, not realizing that I know what a spam filter is.

            More productively, I got one of the Albuquerque news stations to run a story on it, which they had been avoiding, although they run stories on "border violence" nearly every day, because usually "border violence" is supposed to mean a white person was attacked my a brown person, and not the other way around.

      1. Blueb4sunrise

        Always with the negative waves imissopus. I was trying for the Friday Good News Story.
        .
        .
        ………..and a great cheer went up from the lawyers. Also.

  29. littlebigdaddy

    As a former Tarheel, I am surprised. It has one of the best educated populations in the country, and the Triangle, Charlotte, Asheville, and a few other places are generally pretty liberal. I think this may be a flawed poll, maybe because they are only calling land lines.

    1. DustBowlBlues

      yeah. If our beloved editor feels the need to make fun of an always-dumbass state, what not pick on a state that deserves it. I mean, what's Oklahoma? Chopped okra?

      1. Fare la Volpe

        People usually ignore it for its bigger, dumber, and louder brother due South.

        1. MosesInvests

          Bigger and louder, yes. Dumber? I mean, Texas has its share of eedjits, but in '08 not *one* county in Okiestan went for Obama.

  30. DustBowlBlues

    No Spooky Mormon Hell Dreams for Mitt. As is clear in the Book of Mormon, exceptions are made for rich white people.

    1. Negropolis

      There are few states left that haven't passed similar measures.

      It's so obvious, now, that this is just about keeping the president from winning North Carolina in the fall. It's so fucking cynical and transparent that it's sickening. Itis definitely worth noting that these things seem to be put on the ballot during presidential elections. That it discriminates against a group is just the icing. This is about getting the mouth-breathers out to the polls forever-tax cuts and forever-wars.

    2. Fukui-sanYesOta

      That was f'in sickening. Those valley fucks. I once saw a horse out there with a Bush/Cheney sticker on the saddle.

  31. BZ1

    The old conundrum, easier to say no, especially when you haven't got a clue about virtually anything…

  32. Fukui-sanYesOta

    OT This is a pretty interesting walkaround of a US stealth ship from the mid-80s based on F-117 technology. If you jump the long text part, you can set up a kinda slideshow with scrollable panoramas.

    It's obviously the ship which inspired the stealth ship in the Bond film "Tomorrow Never Dies".

    1. Radiotherapy

      I heard ol' what's his name was trying to counter this war machine before he was whacked.

  33. Biel_ze_Bubba

    "And with voters who admit they don’t actually know what the amendment does, 26% of the electorate, it leads by a 64-28 margin. "

    I'm beginning to understand how the GOP does it.

  34. imissopus

    Well, I've read through this comment thread and I am now even more profoundly depressed than I was before. You people are supposed to cheer me up, dammit! I'm going to bed.

  35. Lost Trail: Experimental, Ambient Music From Hillsborough, NC

    how amusing that people pushing for gay and lesbian rights, ie against stereotyping and discrimination…pull out hateful and discriminatory stereotypes and assumptions about a state theyve likely never visited?

    let's make this clear. north carolina has a thriving gay population, a stellar arts scene, and those us not living out in the middle of nowhere are against this amendment.

    don't judge us by the other half of our state, thanks. im a committed liberal activist and i also love my state. and while i may be distressed by this situation, it isn't like other states aren't being as bad or worse. how many of you making snide southern stereotype jokes are from california, i wonder? you sure proved yourself just about as hateful of the LGBT population, didn't you? Just don't generalize my state when i'm a devoted liberal activist in a veritable sea of them down here. stereotyping is stereotyping, whether the subject is a gay person or an entire state you don't understand anything about, thanks.

    1. Negropolis

      Everybody loves their state. Well, most people love their state, anyway. And every state gets made fun of, here, and every negative stereotype ir brought when they do stupid shit, yes, even blue states. So, I really wish Southerners would spare us this ultra-defensiveness whenever their turn comes up.

      This shit has passed in every state it's been put up in, so to think this is some targeted attack on Southern yokels is reading into this more than is either written or even implied.

      Project much?

    2. imissopus

      Uh-oh, someone got his fee-fees hurt!

      Get over yourself, Bubba. We make fun of everyone around here. And that poll doesn't discriminate between liberals and conservatives – near as I can tell, it's saying voters of all stripes of NC are fucking idiots about this issue. And by the way, I have visited your lovely state many times (I grew up next door in Virginia and we think you North Carolinians are absolutely adorable) and I have friends who live in the state who are very smart and generally liberal, but you guys also gave the country Jesse Helms and Virginia Foxx and the 2012 Charlotte Bobcats, so just own it and go whine somewhere else.

  36. DahBoner

    Wayne's World, Beavis & Butthead, Dumb & Dumber: Revolutionary GOP Roadmap to the Future…

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