ALL OF THEM KATIE  1:27 pm April 27, 2012

Regular Guy Scott Brown Has Twice As Many Houses As Mitt Romney

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Awwwww yeahMassachusetts Sen. Scott Brown is just a regular guy — a virile human bear rug of a man, ridin’ in his pickup and bein’ a Joe. He also has six houses, which is so many houses it is almost as many as John McCain’s (which were so many he couldn’t remember) and twice as many as Mitt Romney has. (Three.)

That’s cool though, he probably doesn’t live in all of them, because that would be a crazy number of houses to live in. He probably just rents them out, investment-like. And who doesn’t love a landlord! Also, Scott Brown made lots of hundreds of thousands of dollars — spiking at $839,520, about on par with Bammerz, both of them due to yummy book advances — but only gave (at its peak) 3.23 percent to charity, probably because otherwise he might only have five houses, and that would be Sad. [MassLive]

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Gratuitous World April 27, 2012 at 1:30 pm

yes, but "truck elevators" are much more relatable

chascates April 27, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Wow, I just wish I had an old school bus I could call my own to live in.

Sharkey April 27, 2012 at 2:26 pm

This one appears to be available.

chascates April 27, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Kesey used to have a VCR tape for sale (autographed even) that had highlights of the Pranksters and the bus. I never got around to ordering it and as soon as he died I found his web site but the offer was gone. Someone in Austin had a skoolie they had mounted a VW bus atop of which looked really cool.

Sharkey April 27, 2012 at 3:43 pm

This movie had limited release last fall I think, and if you don't want the DVD, Amazon has it streaming.

Also I found this free documentary about Timothy Leary to be very enlightening, although sad at the end of course.

el_donaldo April 27, 2012 at 1:32 pm

That's great. So many places for him to go cry when Warren whips his pretty boy ass.

ChernobylSoup April 27, 2012 at 1:34 pm

Hey, you got Elizabeth on my Warren.

el_donaldo April 27, 2012 at 1:35 pm

You got Warren on my Elizabeth!

Boojum April 27, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Reece's Socialism Cup!

elviouslyqueer April 27, 2012 at 2:24 pm

when Warren whips his pretty boy ass


ChernobylSoup April 27, 2012 at 1:32 pm

I hope Elizabeth Warren castrates this clown, with votes.

Terry April 27, 2012 at 1:46 pm

And a withering stare.

Beowoof April 27, 2012 at 1:33 pm

And yet the people who vote for guys like this, live in trailers.

Generation[redacted] April 27, 2012 at 1:34 pm

"If you live in a trailer, vote for a truck!"

Toomush_Infer April 27, 2012 at 1:40 pm

truck envy….

HobbesEvilTwin April 27, 2012 at 1:46 pm

yes, sadly the parts of Massachusetts that are like New Hampshire outnumber the parts of Massachusetts that are like Cambridge.

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 27, 2012 at 1:53 pm

I know a guy who lives in a trailer and he has three houses. He just keeps puttin a new trailer in front of the old one when he wears it out.

BerkeleyBear April 27, 2012 at 3:23 pm

That's called adding a wing, Dog.

My wife's grandparents in New Mexico had a plot with 3 trailers and 2 houses on it. They rented one house, a daughter lived in the other, a grandson and his family lived in the Airstream, and grandma and grandpa lived in a doublewide that was attached to the original "manufactured home", effectively creating a "triplewide", although not a fancy one like Huckabee lived in while the governor's mansion in Arkansas was being renovated. And the whole parcel was in the middle of what was basically industrial property.

I visited once before I got married and wondered just what the fuck white trash hell I was getting involved with. But I went ahead anyways – tribute to the power of pussy.

Isyaignert April 28, 2012 at 2:35 am

To the power of pussy!!!

MissTaken April 27, 2012 at 1:35 pm

Hey Scott! When you think about how easy it is to get all those home mortgages these days be sure to thank Elizabeth Warren for pushing the paperwork to be simplified.

Chet Kincaid April 27, 2012 at 1:35 pm

The Boston Globe estimated that Brown's suede barn coat cost $675 (Boston Globe 1/28/10).

Scott Brown's barn contains a Golden Calf, also.

James Michael Curley April 27, 2012 at 1:55 pm

A suede barn coat? A Suede BARN coat? I paid less then that for the last Burberry's Trench I bought (in 1983).

Chet Kincaid April 27, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Scott's barn also houses a cash cow.

actor212 April 27, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Must be an awful small barn if it only needs a coat and not insulation.

Doktor StrangeZoom April 27, 2012 at 2:20 pm

What sort of idiot makes a barn out of suede?

actor212 April 27, 2012 at 2:50 pm

A rich one?

comrad_darkness April 27, 2012 at 1:35 pm

The mouth breathers will love him all the more for it.

SorosBot April 27, 2012 at 1:39 pm

So the daughter are both hot and rich? Sign me up!

Fare la Volpe April 27, 2012 at 1:39 pm

I'm Robin Leech, and welcome to Lifestyles of the Rich and Shamless.

V572 Fehrnstrom April 27, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Think you made a spelling error there. Should be "Robbing Leech."

WiscDad April 27, 2012 at 1:40 pm

You're all just jealous because you don't have a big hairy treasure trail like ol' Scotty. Wonder if Lizzie has one…hhmmmm

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Stairway to Heaven, is what we used to call them in college.

Callyson April 27, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Brown owns as much as $50,000 of stock in Exxon Mobil (May 2011 Financial Disclosure Form).
Brown has invested as much as $50,000 in the Bank of America (May 2011 Financial Disclosure Form).

What, no BP stock? He could have hit the trifecta of most hated companies!

(Also, Elizabeth, release the damn six years of tax returns–don't give fodder to their side when you HAVE to win this one for the sake of the country…)

anniegetyerfun April 27, 2012 at 1:45 pm

I do love me some man-bush, but I'm not into white guys, so this picture is always confusing for me.

MissTaken April 27, 2012 at 1:47 pm

His happy trail leads all the way from House #1 to House #6.

SorosBot April 27, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Someone needs to learn to shave himself.

actor212 April 27, 2012 at 2:07 pm

Needs moar wax

Blueb4sunrise April 27, 2012 at 1:48 pm

I'd like to have a beer in each of his houses. Not with him, just wanna go in and drink the beer.

WhatTheHeck April 27, 2012 at 1:49 pm

I wonder if he used any credit unions to secure all those mortgages?

Exhausted66 April 27, 2012 at 1:54 pm

He sees a world of Haves and Soon-To-Haves so I for one am excited for my extra houses. Someplace to put these damn teenagers.

SayItWithWookies April 27, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Hell, at 800 grand a year, the motherfucker probably still isn't rich enough to be voting in his best interests. Which I guess makes him a regular-guy Republican.

chicken_thief April 27, 2012 at 3:03 pm

Right. I almost feel sorry for him. It must be embarrassing for him to hang out with the "real Republicans", the ones that pay more for a bottle of wine than he did for his pseudo-regular-guy-but-really-Brokeback Mountain-ish barn jacket.

ifthethunderdontgetya April 27, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Love the Mr. Robinson's Neighborhood clip.

P.S. CILL My Landlord.

starfanglednut May 1, 2012 at 8:27 pm
gout April 27, 2012 at 2:02 pm

"but only gave (at its peak) 3.23 percent to charity,"

Jeez, he let all the ladies see his nads, what more do you want from him?

actor212 April 27, 2012 at 2:04 pm

twice as many as Mitt Romney has. (Three.)

Mitt's is bigger.

Come on, we've all seen the pictures!

Chow Yun Flat April 27, 2012 at 2:24 pm

The Massachusetts Democratic Party released a new video this morning portraying him as "a millionaire under that $675 barn jacket."

His barn jacket = my rent.

owhatever April 27, 2012 at 2:33 pm

The senator denies that he never ever had sex with a barn owl.

hagajim April 27, 2012 at 2:42 pm

A $700 fucking dollar jacket!??! And he's trying to make Warren out as the out of touch elite one? Holy shit!

ThundercatHo April 27, 2012 at 2:42 pm

I'll bet you $10,000 that Miss Lindsey and/or Marcus has that picture taped up inside their closet.

chicken_thief April 27, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Miss Lindsay just lurks in the Congressional locker room, waiting with bated breath…

valthemus April 27, 2012 at 3:01 pm

Gripping a copy of Aaron Schock's magazine cover.

Isyaignert April 28, 2012 at 2:38 am

I have no idea what that means, but it sounds good to me.

SoBeach April 27, 2012 at 3:14 pm

"…and twice as many as Mitt Romney has…"

But to be fair Mitt went on a selling spree after learning that voters might be just a little put off by his nationwide string of mansions. He's down to three now, but only because he wants to be president real, real bad.

bikerlaureate April 27, 2012 at 3:37 pm

I'm so jealous of his success, I'm going to vote the straight DemocRAT ticket just out of spite.

ttommyunger April 27, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Boy, you shore have a pretty mouth, now drop them panties right now!

Veritas78 April 27, 2012 at 6:32 pm

Seriously, I'm trying to figure out when he earned all that money, doing what. He brags about how poor he was growing up and through college. Then in the early 90s he started snuffling at the public trough as an assessor, then a state rep and state senator, and being in the national guard. None of which adds up to a net worth of over a million, unless his law practice billings in the 80s were kicking ass.

Negropolis April 28, 2012 at 1:41 am

Pretty good for spending his youth as a wayward, youth criminal. No, really. His daddy sure as hell didn't help him. It's also rather impressive given that he's as dumb as a box of rocks.

Now, it time to get a real senator back in Ted Kennedy's seat. Scott Brown might be an acceptable choice for some random, rural, New England House seat, but as a senator from the state of Massachusetts? No way, no how. He's an earnest dullard, bless his heart, but he's still a dullard.

Isyaignert April 28, 2012 at 2:32 am

You said, "bless his heart" like a real, nice person; however, I think I know what it really means in nice Southern speak, and I agree.

Negropolis April 29, 2012 at 3:49 am

There is never an occasion where "bless his heart" is not an insult. lol

Isyaignert April 28, 2012 at 2:29 am

You can see his pubes in that pic. That is so uncomely, among other things. Ewwwwww!!!!!

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