Presumptive Republican presidential nominee and man-shaped pile of hair gel Mitt Romney needs some more scratch, fellows, and so his surrogates are passing around a nifty Kickstarter-style menu of fabulous prizes you could get if you had 50,000 clams that for some weird reason you did not need for shelter, food, or four months worth of healthcare premiums.
The campaign is asking people who are able to make a $50,000 contribution to do so today and become a "Founding Member" of Romney Victory. These donors will be invited to a special retreat with Governor Romney in late June in California and will have preferred status at the first Presidential Inaugural retreat as well as yet to be determined access at the Republican National Convention in Tampa in August.
But wait! There's more!
For $10,000, you and your opposite-sex spouse can get a picture with Mr. Romney -- somewhere the sad puddings behind Newt Gingrich's $50 photo ops are gnashing their teeth at the unusual smallness of a Gingrich Idea -- and ... that seems to be about it. What, not even a totebag?
[ Buzzfeed ]
Just promised the DNC more dough than I can really afford -- but in the long run, I figure I can even less afford a GOPtard in the White House.
My name will appear on the internet, of course, for any and all wingtards to see and maybe decide they don't want to give me business. Unlike the fucking billionaires who donate millions anonymously to PACs, without anybody knowing who they are. (Because THAT would be unconstitutional.)
If I can get the same 5,000% return that Mitt got from Bain on his IRA money, I'll sign on. Otherwise, fuck him.