ONE LAST GRIFT  10:33 am April 12, 2012

Check-Kiting Grifter Newt Gingrich Stiffed Nevada Small Businessman, But It Felt Like A Kiss (VIDEO)

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Here is some geezer talking about what a fraud Newt Gingrich is, and how ol’ Newty owes him eight large and will never ever pay him. Also, he will still totally vote for him, because personal responsibility is such an important part of the GOP ethos. [TheYoungTurks]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 85 comments }

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:36 am

"some geezer"

Oooh, is Wonkette going British?

Terry April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

We'll know if they start dropping extraneous U's in words.

Lascauxcaveman April 12, 2012 at 11:03 am

Blimey. You mean wourds old mate?

trampndirtdown April 12, 2012 at 11:08 am

Needs more dozy cunts.

proudgrampa April 12, 2012 at 11:11 am

Tally-ho! Pip pip. And all that rot, you know?

LesBontemps April 12, 2012 at 11:19 am

Send the lobsterbacks back to Knifecrime Island!

MadBrahms April 12, 2012 at 11:40 am

Wait for "wanker". That'll clinch it.

metamarcisf April 12, 2012 at 10:37 am

After one of the early debates, Newt approached the moderator, Diane Sawyer, put his arm around her and said “Say honey, I’d really like to get into those pants of yours.” She replied “Thanks anyway but I‘ve already got an asshole in there.”

Badonkadonkette April 12, 2012 at 10:37 am

Check-Kiting Grifter Newt Gingrich Stiffed Nevada Small Businessman, But It Felt Like A Kiss

A kiss with a grift is better than none.

Tundra Grifter April 12, 2012 at 11:56 am

You rang?

slithytoves April 12, 2012 at 10:38 am

Newt is bankrupt in every way. See if anyone can collect from him on his ethical debt.

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:38 am

Now that guy is a fucking paragon of good business sense!!!

Callyson April 12, 2012 at 11:46 am

He certainly demonstrates how well Republicans handle economic affairs.

Tundra Grifter April 12, 2012 at 11:57 am

Starting with extending credit to a political campaign. Cash on the barrelhead is the rule.

Campaigns – unlike corporations – can simply close up shop and no one is responsible for any outstanding debt. Ask Alan Keyes about that one…

Lucidamente1 April 12, 2012 at 10:39 am

"Newt the Stiffer" will be his title as Emperor of the Moon.

LiveToServeYa April 12, 2012 at 10:54 am

This is not a title with which Callista would agree.

Serolf_Divad April 12, 2012 at 10:39 am

Stockholm syndrome much? Guy would probably vote for Bernie Madoff if he could.

ManchuCandidate April 12, 2012 at 10:44 am

Damnit. You beat me to it. I was thinking exactly along the same lines.

freakishlywrong April 12, 2012 at 10:39 am

Also, he will still totally vote for him
Assholes such as this deserve what happens to them. The rest of us, however, don't.

DaRooster April 12, 2012 at 10:39 am

Integrity!!
We got it!!

ChernobylSoup April 12, 2012 at 10:40 am

I don't buy it. A real Nevada Small Businessman would have broken Newt's legs already.

Biff April 12, 2012 at 10:50 am

Vegas was best when it was mobbed up. Now it's just got the ex-mayor that can't let go of his history as a mob lawyer going for him, and the town.

Lascauxcaveman April 12, 2012 at 11:06 am

Mafia > Disney.

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 11:12 am

But I understand that The Mouse is far more dangerous than The Mob.

proudgrampa April 12, 2012 at 11:14 am

Mouse over, mouse back. Who can explain it?

hagajim April 12, 2012 at 10:40 am

Has Newt been taking grifter lessons from Lou Sarah? If so he must have failed the "don't write checks your ass can't cash" lesson.

Chick-Fil-Atheist™ April 12, 2012 at 10:41 am

"Even if I don't collect [the $8,000 the campaign owes], I still would have to vote for him if he was the Republican nominee, over President Obama."

Looks like he just donated $8,000 to the Gingrich campaign.

sullivanst April 12, 2012 at 10:51 am

Sure does. What's the individual contribution limit again? Oops. Or was that a direct corporate donation? Oops again.

Biff April 12, 2012 at 10:52 am

Good. I hope he gets busted for going over the maximum campaign donation limit.

Barb April 12, 2012 at 10:42 am

If you are such a fan of the GOP you should consider the $8,000.00 a campaign donation, spank your inner moppet and get over it.

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:42 am

Maybe SarahPAC can lend a hand here.

Chick-Fil-Atheist™ April 12, 2012 at 10:54 am

At least Stephen Colbert's SuperPAC is operating within the rules. Maybe he can let Newt hold some ends.

widestanceromance April 12, 2012 at 10:42 am

YOU WILL RESPECT MY CANDIDAC-EYE!

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:43 am

"Ever get the feeling you've been cheated? Good night."

LesBontemps April 12, 2012 at 11:09 am

"Newty Rotten" just doesn't have the same ring to it.

James Michael Curley April 12, 2012 at 10:43 am

Why does it look like someone hit Cenk Uygur in the face with a garden spade?

CogitoErgoBibo April 12, 2012 at 10:43 am

If you view this through the Mittens prism of value, where $374K isn't a lot of money, this makes complete sense. Total chump change can't get between this guy and his Chosen One! Also, psst. Buddy. Can I get a "loan"?

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:44 am

Tiffany's, take note.

donner_froh April 12, 2012 at 10:44 am

Not that surprising that the geezer would still vote for the guy who stiffed him for $8,000. Printers (he owns a company called Las Vegas Color Graphics or something close to that) always get money upfront from political campaigns.

Or they don't get paid.

Baconzgood April 12, 2012 at 10:46 am

His checks are as rubbery as his torso.

nounverb911 April 12, 2012 at 10:47 am

"Check-Kiting Grifter Newt Gingrich Stiffed Nevada Small Businessman, But It Felt Like A Kiss"
Did Newt send Callista in to finish the job?

Clancy_Pants April 12, 2012 at 10:48 am

A lot of holes in the desert, and a lot of problems are buried in those holes. But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the hole already dug before you show up with a package in the trunk. Otherwise, you're talking about a half-hour to forty-five minutes worth of digging. And who knows who's gonna come along in that time? Pretty soon, you gotta dig a few more holes. You could be there all fuckin' night.

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:51 am

Listen to me Newt. I got your head in a fuckin' vise. I'll squash your head like a fuckin' grapefruit if you don't give me my 8 large. Don't make me have to do this, please. Don't make me be a bad guy, come on.

Newt: Fuck you!

Clancy_Pants April 12, 2012 at 10:54 am

Newt's methods of campaigning weren't scientific, but they worked. When he won, he collected. When he lost, he told the donors to go fuck themselves. I mean, what were they going to do, muscle Newt?

DaRooster April 12, 2012 at 11:19 am

And if you are dealing with Newt… you sure can't leave the diggin' to him.

Baconzgood April 12, 2012 at 10:48 am

NEEDZ MOAR PANTONE BLUE!

nounverb911 April 12, 2012 at 10:53 am

Reflex blue or process blue?

Baconzgood April 12, 2012 at 10:59 am

I could never understand why, out of all the printers inks, Reflex Blue was the hardest to get off your hands. That shit would stay on your hands for days no matter how much you cleaned them off. Not even black 6 stained that much.

Jus_Wonderin April 12, 2012 at 11:10 am

This reminds me of when I murdered that whore in that seedy motel. Damn, I had to pay for an extra night there just to get it all cleaned up.

James Michael Curley April 12, 2012 at 12:19 pm

Norm, you should have replaced the shower curtain.

Lascauxcaveman April 12, 2012 at 11:14 am

It's made from human blood.

Texan_Bulldog April 12, 2012 at 10:50 am

Sounds like Newt has the 'evading bill collectors' lingo down pat. He didn't ask for the guy's name or anything–just told him he'd work on it & hung up. Hilarious. He should have told him all his money goes to Tiffany's to keep the little woman from leaving him.

ManchuCandidate April 12, 2012 at 10:50 am

Love hurts, Love steals, Love wounds' and mars
A GOP voter's strong enough
To take it in the ass, take in the ass
Love is like the Newt, he steals some of my cash
Love hurts, Ooo-oo Love hurts

LesBontemps April 12, 2012 at 11:03 am

Love comes in spurts
in dangerous flirts
and it murders your heart
they didn't tell you that part

thefrontpage April 12, 2012 at 10:55 am

Newt Gingrich is a Communist, and a Radical Islamic Muslim Terrorist!

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 10:56 am

It's not quite clear to me what the point of bringing this guy on the show was. He doesn't really seem too outraged; more resigned to his ass-fucking-with-sand-for-lubricant than anything else.

ManchuCandidate April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

For comedy

proudgrampa April 12, 2012 at 11:17 am

Well, Current has to fill up the time with something now that Olbermann is gone.

JustPixelz April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

I suppose Newt will use this incident as an example of the experience he'll bring to the Oval Office. "The debt ceiling is a serious problem. And I know how to fix it."

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 11:09 am

"I called him up on the phone, and said 'This is Hu Jintao, and you owe me money. Can you please help me?' He said 'How much do I owe you?' I said 'About 3 trillion dollars." He said 'We've had a rough time in Iraq and Afghanistan, kinda got behind. I'll try to scrape some money together to get you paid. Goodbye.'"

LesBontemps April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

I still would have to vote for him if he was the Republican nominee, over President Obama

Jesus, dude, how much did Obama stiff you for?

Chick-Fil-Atheist™ April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

Wait… a Nevada businessman gets stiffed by a person whose is being backed by a casino…?

LesBontemps April 12, 2012 at 11:13 am

Paging Harry Reid …

LiveToServeYa April 12, 2012 at 10:57 am

Newt will have to sell the development rights to the moon to somebody to make good on all this.

Radio福井県 April 12, 2012 at 10:58 am

Newt should have just shot him in the face.

Jus_Wonderin April 12, 2012 at 10:58 am

Ah, I get it. Newt is one of those job creators.

"Here, do this job for me, Mister Sign Man."
"What?! Pay for the sign? You're fuckin' kiddin' me, right?"

mrblifil April 12, 2012 at 10:58 am

On the streets I'm just a geezer
got to make ends meet yeah
got to do what I need to
shit, we all got our runnins now

Goonemeritus April 12, 2012 at 10:59 am

Let’s face it when a white guy steals from you it just feels more upscale somehow.

Mumbletypeg April 12, 2012 at 11:01 am

…but it felt like a kiss

Yet each man kills the thing he loves
By each let this be heard.
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word.
The coward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!

–Oscar Wilde, from "The Ballad of Reading Gaol." I do not know how to pronounce 'gaol' — is it like "Gay Old Party"? — or is it like "gou" as in "gouging" your creditors.

Lascauxcaveman April 12, 2012 at 11:19 am

Just like 'Jail,' I believe. Only some folks stretch it out a bit. Jay-ol. As in, "That former congressman should really be in jayol."

James Michael Curley April 12, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Gah-ool

Like those things that attached to your spine in the old Stargate TV series and suck the life out of you, you know – the 1%.

Arken April 12, 2012 at 11:09 am

This was a good video. Not only did I get to see an idiot Republican, but the amount of time I had to see Cenk's annoying smug face was minimal.

BaldarTFlagass April 12, 2012 at 11:10 am

So, this guy has Newt's cell number? I wonder how he managed that.

Mahousu April 12, 2012 at 11:14 am

I'm sorry, but given how poor Newt's results were in Nevada, paying this guy would just be rewarding failure. That's something a historic figure like Newt simply can't afford to do.

Maman April 12, 2012 at 11:25 am

Good luck collecting dude, Newt bounced a check to the State of Utah for $500 to get his name on the ballot.

WiscDad April 12, 2012 at 11:34 am

A fuck is as good as a kiss to a blind horse

Tundra Grifter April 12, 2012 at 12:03 pm

That's probably the only stiff Ole Newt has these days.

spareme April 12, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Maybe more of Newt's supporters will fall on a knive for him, too.

fuflans April 12, 2012 at 12:10 pm

the economist article on the end of his 'campaign' was entitled: 'deflating the zeppelin' accompanied by a really unflattering girth picture.

Doktor StrangeZoom April 12, 2012 at 12:28 pm

Party of Personal Reprehensibility.

Ayn Rand Paul Tard April 12, 2012 at 12:42 pm

Child bearers and gentlemen, this is why we can't have a nice government.

DahBoner April 12, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Nevada Small Bid'nessmen obviously have a SURPLUS of money, which means they are not getting conned enough by sleazeball Republicant drifter-grifters…

owhatever April 12, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Newt has volunteered his daughters to work as janitors for this guy to pay off the debt.

Chet Kincaid April 12, 2012 at 4:02 pm

"Even though Newt stole my money, I could never vote for the Kenyan Usurper because he is trying to steal my money!!"

ttommyunger April 14, 2012 at 10:21 am

Stupid is as stupid does.

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