Like that.Uh oh, there is trouble in right-wing-asshole paradise! Look how mad WND is at Ghost Andrew Breitbart for stealing all its shit! This is the sound of a riding glove meeting a soft hairless cheek!

Editor’s note: In 2008, WND thoroughly vetted President Obama’s radical background. Many of those original exclusive reports, almost entirely ignored by the establishment news media, currently are being utilized four years later by some media outlets in the lead up to this year’s presidential election. From now until election day, WND will present its original investigations into Obama and his radical ties with bonus updates. These reports are as important today as they were in 2008. Following is the first in a series of articles aimed at re-vetting Obama.

Anyway, what’s the NEWEST REVETTENING? Well, we are ashamed to say that our reading comprehension is unfortunately not quite up to the task of diagramming the layer upon layer of guilt-by-association and guilt-by-guilt that makes up these proto-Glenn-Beckian ravings. Some people knew some other people who were influenced by a fifth person who once read something or sat on a panel with Studs Terkel, right? (Right.) So you COULD SEE why they’d be so mad at Ghost Breitbart for jacking their vibe.

This one says Valerie Jarrett, the president’s confidante, is a Communist MOLE, probably, we think, who was planted early on to report on Obama? Or lead him to the Fifth Column? IT IS NOT CLEAR.

Was Valerie Jarrett, one of President Obama’s closest advisers, introduced to the president’s political circles by her father-in-law, a communist sympathizer who worked with the radical Obama mentor Frank Marshall Davis?

Jarrett’s family background and her initial introduction to Obama may tie her to onetime Obama environmental adviser Van Jones’ radical ideology.

Jarrett’s father-in-law, Vernon Jarrett, was an associate of Frank Marshall Davis, the controversial labor movement activist who has been identified as an early influence on Obama.

Vernon Jarrett and Davis worked together in 1940 in a Communist Party-dominated organization, the Citizen’s Committee to Aid Packing House Workers. The group’s own correspondence, previously uncovered by the New Zeal blog, describes its communist influence. Many of its leaders were tied to the Communist Party.

The pair also frequented the SouthSide Community Art Center, which was dominated by communists. In addition, Davis and Vernon Jarrett worked in the late 1940s on the communist-influenced, black-run Chicago Defender newspaper.

It goes on like that pretty much forever. Fucking white people love stealing shit so much, they even do it from beyond the grave. Boooo. [WND]

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  • Barb

    The voices in Glenn's head talk too freaking much.

    • Biel_ze_Bubba

      If the didn't talk, they wouldn't be voices.

  • nounverb911

    Just blame Breitbart's undead father-in-law, the black-listed, ex-communist Orson Bean.

    • Generation[redacted]

      Live Breitbart had a close association with a known communist? Does Dead Breitbart know about this?

  • Oh, goodie. We get to do 1950 again. Who the fuck listens to anything that Allen West says in the first place.

  • From the WND Obama vetting desk, 2008:

    "Valerie Jarrett, one of President Obama’s closest advisers…


    Need I say more???

    • anniegetyerfun

      I just assumed as much, as I don't know who she is. But if she follows the "radical" ideology (blackness) of Van (Black) Jones, there must be something black about her.

    • Antispandex

      Wait…I thought they couldn't find the WND. Even Bush said so.

  • OkieDokieDog

    I refuse to believe that Obama is a commie until I hear it from Allen West, who might know someone who knows someone else who heard about someone reading it on the internet one time.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    Oh my fuckin' Gaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh………………….

  • elviouslyqueer

    Shorter WND: Obama still a Kenyan Muslin Nigger.

    • mormos

      *Niger(ian prince)

      • Boojum

        I thought he was Kenyan? So much for the vetting!

        • Negropolis

          I thought he was Indo-Kenyan?

  • Who's WND gonna call?

    • Exhausted66

      Ghost Brietbart!

    • not that Dewey


  • orygoon

    What is this, National Mole Week or something?

  • Sassomatic

    If Barack Obama is a communist I'm The Tooth Fairy.

    • nounverb911

      What's the going rate for a molar these days?

      • George Spelvin

        O Jeezuz, more shit about Avogadro.

        • new_pic_for_NEWTer

          I see what you did there…

        • lulzmonger

          This comment is worth at least 6.023 X 10²³ lulz!

    • bflrtsplk

      Do I get extra if it has a gold filling?

    • Don't you see?

      He's taken the Republicans' ideas…that's redistribution!

    • You owe me a Quarter!

  • edgydrifter

    Americans can't remember who was president on 9/11–you expect them to connect this nebula of random dots? Nice try, WND. This may get you some hot action with Orly Taint, but otherwise you needn't have bothered.

  • Fukui-sanYesOta

    I blame Kevin Bacon.

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      He is History's Greatest Monster.

      • Actually, Kevin Bacon apparently not be linked to History's Greatest Monster, according to this website, which crawls IMDB:

        Though, you know who else, can be linked?

    • Hmmmm. bacon!

    • Hey Fukui, good to see you.

      • Fukui-sanYesOta

        Thanks Jukesgrrl, I've missed you guys.

        It's been tough as hell but a person has to move on, right? Things are as they are, and I still like a snark or two on my favourite website.

        • If you need to blow off some steam.This is the place to do it.Uh oh, I said “blow.”Not a good word to bring up here.

    • Negropolis

      He's the cause of all the wars in the world.

      That said, I'm still very much a fan of regular bacon. Mmmm….bacon…mmmm….

  • Antispandex

    Crazy shit —> Glen Beck <—Obama —> 9 / 11 <— hair balls —–> weak nuclear force —> chicken fingers…..

    See the pattern?

    • bagofmice

      That is so not UML.

    • Doktor StrangeZoom


    • iburl

      I'm following the chain wherever it leads…. Chicken Fingers —-> Time Cube —-> Saul Alinsky —–> Boxcar Willie <—- Reptiloid Aliens —-> Battlefield Earth <—-> Universal Health Care Coverage —> Van Jones <— Johnny Winter —> Racist Suntanning Booth Tax

    • Nostrildamus

      I didn't at first, but this guy helped me figure it out.

      • McDonnellville

        That camper probably smelled like candy & missing children.

      • Boojum

        And did you notice that his license plate is 67266. Three sixes equals 666. 7 – 2 = 6. So OBAMA IS 666 PLUS ONE MORE 6!!!

        • Boojum

          Oh, look! I have 6 upfists! 1, 2, 3, 4, 6! This is scary.

  • Radical WND's radical strategy of radically inserting the word radical into as many radical sentences as they can radically manage makes their radical diatribes radically harder to radically read. Radical.

    • Repetition is fundamentally a great rhetorical device.

      • McDonnellville

        Yes, it's radically fundamentally, as well.

      • A penguin sighting! How are ya, buddy?

        • Well hey Chet, I'm good. I've been lurking around, just for various reasons not writing more than a few comments here and there, and the new regime puts up so many damn posts every day I'm sure they are harder to stumble across.

    • BerkeleyBear

      If they aren't careful, they'll go from radical to awesome. And then it is a short slide down the slippery slope to full Spicoli.

      The President is like, radical, dude.

  • These reports are as important today as they were in 2008.

    Very true. WND is exactly as important now as it was in 2008.

    • Because they didn't have the brains to steal BAT BOY!! from the defunct Weekly World News.

  • nounverb911

    Needs more "Manchurian Candidate".

  • anniegetyerfun

    They're still bringing up Van Jones? Weak.

    • I don't think they're going to get too far with Van Jones as Dangerous Radical. He was on TV the other day talking about ALEC and my 85-year-old ma said, "Who is that nice-looking young man? He's very well-spoken."

  • AlterNewt



  • bflrtsplk

    How can we be sure Breitbart is really, you know, passed on. He could be one of those types who must avoid the sun to survive.

    • nounverb911

      Where's his long form death certificate?

    • Let's dig up his grave just to be sure. Who's with me!? Huh?…Huh.

      • Boojum

        I'm right behind you, with a camera and a cell phone.

        • Excellent! It's the only way we'll know for sure. I'll bet we can get Geraldo Rivera in on this — Empty! A-and some whacked-out Christians — He is risen! Then there's the Zombie angle…

        • When you're caught and told how horrible you are, tell them James O'Keefe sent you … and make him prove he didn't.

    • LetUsBray

      Sure, like Dick Cheney.

  • Robman2

    I really thought the latex gloves were off, and that this was a joke by the Editrix. There is a place called WND,

    WOW just as important as WMD's in Iraq and like Levon Helms, steering the conversation, "Anna Nicolle married for love".

  • SexySmurf

    I want to play Six-Degrees of Obamanation:

    Former Obama minion Kal Penn was in the Harold and Kumar movies with John Cho, who was in American Beauty with some broad named Sue Casey. Casey was in Deep in my Heart with the late Walter Pidgeon, who was in Holiday in Mexico. Holiday featured a young extra named (we're about to go down the rabbit hole here people) FIDEL CASTRO!!! (Dun dun dun)*

    *That's supposed to be dramatic music.

    • I watched Harold & Kumar!

      I'm in the conspiracy.

      • Of course you are!

        Hiding in plain daylight…Brilliant! Who would think to look for a mole who calls himself "ManchuCandidate"?

      • finallyhappy

        I spoke to Kal Penn one day as he walked home from the White House through Farragut Square several years ago(during his first WH stint)- he didn't answer me but he did stare at me when I said- "Hi!!!! You're Kal Penn!!!"

        • Why haven't the wingnuts jumped all over Obama for hiring a Filthy Hollywood Brown who makes movies mocking the scourge of drug abuse and the 9/11 security regime?! Plus he played a terrorist one season on "24"!!

    • Lionel[redacted]Esq

      Does this mean that Obama is constantly stoned?

    • Blueb4sunrise

      Is there a guitar tab for that?

    • Wile E. Quixote

      Holy cow. Fidel was in a movie. Just think, if some Hollywood talent scout had spotted him he could have become the go-to actor whenever Hollywood needed to cast a smoldering Latin and the geo-political history of Central America would be completely different. Plus Nancy Reagan probably would have given him blow jobs too.

    • Negropolis

      Wait, John Cho was in American Beauty? Really?

  • PhilippePetain

    "Hm, I see, so what you're saying is "Nigger commie nigger nigger commie coon commie." Yes, hm, that does seem to have something to it.

    <pulls lever for Romney>

  • Callyson

    From now until election day, WND will present its original investigations into Obama and his radical ties with bogus updates. These reports are as unimportant today as they were in 2008. Following is the first in a series of articles aimed at re-bashing Obama.


  • hagajim

    Obama! Blah Blah Blah Blah, Commie!

  • MissTaken

    OMIGOD! Valerie Jarrett married someone who's related to someone who hung out with someone 70 years ago and together they did some stuff for some people. This is terrible.

    • Fukui-sanYesOta


      • Lionel[redacted]Esq

        Let's face it, this proves that Valerie Jarrett is Joseph Stalin's love child!

      • Who, coincidentally, was at the height of his power seventy years ago. Wheels within wheels!

    • I saw the words "Community Art Center" in there so, for Gawd's sake, call the COPS!!

  • Radio福井県

    You see everybody, Obama is going to wait for his second term to unleash his radical Marxist agenda. This whole center-right administration thus far has been a huge cover for Act II — American Communism,

    • Now we know what he was REALLY transmitting to Vladimir!!!

    • Nothingisamiss

      Thank God. I thought he was seriously moderate for a minute there.

    • Wile E. Quixote

      About time dammit, I've been wanting a job as a guard at a FEMA death camp ever since I first heard about them.

  • nounverb911

    Has Romney un-baptized Beck yet?

    • SayItWithWookies

      Nah — baptize 'em all, let Kolob sort 'em out.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Oh — so that's why nobody was paying attention the first time.

    • LesBontemps

      And now there will be twice as many people not paying attention.

  • mormos


  • iburl

    My new band is called "Van Jones’ Radical Ideology"

    • bagofmice

      Sustainable energy is so Rad! Especially when it's nuclear.

  • Monsieur_Grumpe

    I found that I can get some satisfaction from printing out a couple of pages of WND and wiping my ass with it. Not a lot of satisfaction but it's still better than reading it.

    • Swampgas_Man

      That can cause nasty paper cuts.

      • Boojum

        And ass cancer, from the plutonium.

  • HelmutNewton

    "Many of those original exclusive reports, almost entirely ignored by the establishment news media…"

    WND. Just as clueless as they were in 2008.

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    When are they going to get to the stuff that no one discussed in 2008, like the fact that Obama was a Senator from Illinois, or that he married a black women? Rumor has it, he is half black himself!

    • finallyhappy

      I hear he has two daughters who are black and that maybe he has other black relatives.

      • Fare la Volpe

        And one time

        He hired a black person

        Instead of a white person.

      • Negropolis

        And, the dog Bo? Totally blah.

    • His great-grandfather's name was Ralph Waldo Emerson Dunham, Sr. Je-SUS! Somebody get some Trump operatives on that. Ralph Waldo Emerson was a goddam Trancendentalist!!! AND he wrote poetry.

  • "What a drag it is gettin' mole'd" ♪

  • Doktor StrangeZoom

    Yes, as we all know, a President's advisers' in-laws are crucial influences on the direction of national policy.

    • OneYieldRegular

      On top of that, the accusation is that the advisor has been influenced by an in-law who was an alleged associate of one of Obama's own mentors, so bringing in the in-law just seems like overkill. It reminds me of my late mother, who used to claim that a tall glass of gin with nine raisins in it helped her arthritis. I told her, "Mom, I'm pretty sure you can leave out the raisins."

  • chascates

    The SouthSide Community Art Center. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.

  • mavenmaven

    Keeping in mind that Joseph Farah is an ARAB, who knows, perhaps he's been hired by the COMMUNISTS to start a pretend right wing newspaper allowing him to plant all these false rumors to DESTROY AMERICA! Perhaps he'll be KILLED by Obama just like Breitbart was, to protect the CONSPIRACY. Just wait and see!!!

    • McDonnellville

      His dyed mustache makes me suspicious about his real allegiance.

    • Boojum

      I have seen no evidence disproving it and he has not denied it.

    • Where's his Long Form Non-Communist Certificate! I haven't seen it!

  • gout

    Hard to argue with that logic.

    • McDonnellville

      They make some interesting connections.

    • Boojum

      At least without Thorazine or electroshock.

  • Troglodeity

    Re-vetting (v.): 1. To re-hash previously discredited information in a desperate attempt to come up with filler for a failing website. 2. To scrutinize someone's credentials two times more than Sarah Palin's were before her selection as the GOP VP candidate in 2008.

  • LesBontemps

    I want to know more about Obama's radical ties, 'cause the neckwear I've seen him in is pretty lame.

  • Troglodeity

    And if Republicans are going back to 1940 (Nineteen-fucking-FORTY!) to dredge up that the father of one of Obama's advisers was a pinko, they surely can't complain about Dems going back to the 1980s for direct proof that Romney himself is a dog torturer.

  • Lionel[redacted]Esq

    So, by "vetting" what the right wing means is repeating the same smears they have been saying for the last five years?

    • not that Dewey

      Perhaps they meant "Vittering"

  • OneYieldRegular

    These people would soil themselves if they knew of the 100,000+ people gathered at Place Bastille in Paris last week to support Communist Party favorite Jean-Luc Melenchon.

    • Boojum

      Paris, Tennessee holds 100,000 people?

    • Boojum

      Paris, Tennessee holds 100,000 people? And it was also the birthplace of Vernon Jarrett, who is blah!

    • Negropolis

      Slight correction, Jean-Luc Melenchon leads up a left-wing party, but it's not France's Communist Party, and even before that, he was just part of the Socialists.

      • I assume he's a member of the Progressive Caucus. What Godless state does he represent? Taxachusetts?

      • OneYieldRegular

        Thanks for the correction. You're right, and he was never a member of the Communist Party nor does he identify as a communist. But Melenchon's Left Front is representing the Communist Party – as well as several other progressive parties – in the elections this month. Place Bastille was an ocean of red. I counted at least 78-81 actual communists there.

        • Negropolis

          No, thank you for your corrections. I didn't know that the Left Front was an umbrella in this election. Regardless, Jean-Luc may as well be a communist with how he talks…and I don't necessarily mean that as a slur or a praise. He reminds me of Ron Paul, in a way, not necessarily ideologically, but how he's seemed to have come out of nowhere to garner grassroots support.

  • Do these people realize how ridiculous they look, slandering harmless Chicago institutions like the Southside Community Art Center, the Chicago Defender and Vernon Jarrett? (Vernon Jarrett, who was a syndicated columnist for the radical, bolshevik Chicago Tribune?)

    • Wile E. Quixote

      I'll bet that all of those "harmless" Chicago institutions aren't as harmless as you think because they're from Chicago, and do you know what happens in Chicago? Chicago style politics. And I'll bet that while those "harmless" Chicago institutions were engaging in Chicago style politics and plotting Kenyan Muslim Socialist Insurrection (which is also from Chicago) that they were also eating Chicago style pizza and not good, wholesome red-blooded American pizza.

      • Needs moar "Chicago Thug."

        • BaldarTFlagass

          I really liked that James Caan movie "Thief."

    • No. No, they do not.

    • swordfis

      I seriously believe that the right wing has a dead zombie problem.

    • fuflans

      i didn't know vernon jarrett was valerie jarrett's father.

      true fact.

  • not that Dewey

    Then they came for the trade unionists, and I … WAITAMINNIT.

    • If you want to appear to be a credible right-winger, it's important to excise that first two lines (communists/socialists, trade unionists, &c) from that poem thingy.

      **This has been your daily WINGNUT-TIP.**

  • ElPinche

    OT: The Right's darling little cuddle bear George Zimmerman has been charged with 2nd degree murder. I wonder if Tucker Carlson is going to show to Zimmerman's holding cell to spoon him and massage his feet?

  • Warpde

    So, let me get this right.
    My mothers, brother other sisters, cousin, father, marries his sisters, friends, cousins, brothers, nieces brother who went to school with a man that's sisters friends father read a book on Marx it's a commie plot to infiltrate the other 50+ % of already commie Dems in guberment


    You bastard commie Obama!!!!!

  • MadBrahms

    Here's the thing: to a rational person not suffering from a severe case of confirmation bias, long lists of Kevin-Bacon-esque relations seem like a pretty idiotic way to draw conclusions about anyone.

    To the true believer, the more tangential the connections, the more they point to a vast conspiracy. It's amazing how these things work. How do you even respond to shit like this? You just don't, I guess.

    • finallyhappy

      let me see, I have been to the home of someone who actually knew Saul Alinsky – I guess I am next in line after Raoul Castro to run Cuba

  • WiscDad

    Fuckin' ehhhh…prick on prick violence

  • You mean Obama's NOT a DLC/Clintonite centrist with a streak of "Scoop" Jackson (a scoop of "Streak" Jackson?) War-Hawk Liberal?…Man, I'm so relieved! Now I can't wait to vote!

  • Boojum

    Vernon Jarrett's name starts with a "V", which is the first letter of the word vichyssoise, which is French for cold potato soup. "Cold" starts with "c", as does "communist," which is another word for French. It's obvious!

  • DocChaos

    The future irony of this is that 70 years from now, on whatever has replaced the internet ( airborne infovirus?), some left wing site will be playing the guilt by association game by pointing out that a presidential advisor's father-in-law was an associate of Joseph Farah, paranoid rightwing nutjob editor-in-chief of WND back in 2010.

  • Negropolis

    P.S. Valerie Jarrett is blah, so if you don't believe our bullshit guilt-by-association narrative, there's always that.

  • lulzmonger

    Hoo boy, you libtards are SO screwed now!

    I mean, just look at how well this "Vet Obama" tactic worked LAST time!

    Strangest thing, though – in the late summer of 2008, while the Dow & NASDAQ were imitating a Stuka in a power-dive for day after terrifying day, even people like Alan "Fuckface" Greenspan were saying the Guvmint might have to nationalize the major banks, just to keep that whole yucky "Big Frickin' Piles Of Corpses In The Streets" scenario at bay.

    It must've taken all of Comrade Obama's superhuman Stalinist discipline to bail everyone out on the public's dime instead … let alone hire so many Goldman Sachs alumni to his economic team. In fact, at this point some might argue that his sleeper-cell training's gone a bit TOO well … c'mon, Barry, you gotta ACTIVATE the plan to destroy Amerika BEFORE you retire from the Presidentin' gig, you wacky Blahshevik usurper!

  • Quayle2012_KNOT

    The Vittering is next.

  • Valerie Jarrett was born and raised in Iran, WND! You call this Vetting?!

    Jarrett was born in Shiraz, Iran to American parents James E. Bowman and Barbara Taylor Bowman. Her father, a pathologist and geneticist, ran a hospital for children in Shiraz, as part of a program where American doctors and agricultural experts sought to help jump-start developing countries' health and farming efforts. When she was five, the family moved to London for one year, returning to Chicago in 1963.[3]

    Batshit Quality Control is really sleeping on the job, if you guys haven't flipped your fucking flowcharts over this key cog in The Conspiracy!!

  • DahBoner

    "This is the sound of a riding glove meeting a soft, hairless cheek"

    How do you manage to get any work done with all that racket?

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