Don't make her pull this car over!GOP Senator Lisa Murkowski, why do you insist on undermining the War on the War on Women? RNC Chair Reince Priebus has said it’s fictional. Kathryn-Jean Lopez twits 17 times a day with links to her one or two columns saying the same thing. Even Ol’ Whatserface, Drinky Nooner — who you know has seen the inside of an Ortho Novum packet or two — snoots in her patrician manner that this is not a War on Women but a Defense of Liberty against religious terrorist President Disappointment. Lisa Murkowski, stop fuckin’ it up! “If you don’t feel this is an attack, you need to go home and talk to your wife and your daughters,” she told the Chamber of Commerce in Homer, Alaska. But K-Lo does not have a wife and daughters, Murkowski! Why are you racist against K-Lo’s gay marriage?

We already knew that Lisa Murkowski almost instantly regretted joining ranks with her GOPpy fellows on the Blunt Amendment — the Mitch McConnell-led snit that would have allowed any private employer to determine his employees’ access to medicine based on his own religious beliefs — when she spent the entire next weekend getting yelled at by Alaskan ladies about it. She apologized, and said given it to do over, she would vote no. But does that mean she has to go around badmouthing a perfectly respectable GOP meme that it is the Democrats who are at war with women? And does she have to go on and on and on about their terrible record on beating up ladies?

Murkowski criticized GOP presidential candidates for not condemning Rush Limbaugh for calling Georgetown law student Sandra Fluke a “slut” and a “prostitute,” which he later apologized for. Fluke was rejected as a witness before a panel on the Obama contraception mandate chaired by House Oversight And Government Reform Chairman Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) last February.

“To have those kind of slurs against a woman … you had candidates who want to be our president not say, ‘That’s wrong. That’s offensive.’ They did not condemn the rhetoric,” she said.

What else would you like to say before you are purged from the Republican Party, Lisa Murkowski?

She also said that she would continue to support funding for Planned Parenthood, adding that the courts have affirmed a legal right to an abortion and she stands by that.

Lisa Murkowski will now be Mitt Romney’s vice presidential nominee, for that important pivot away from wackjob for the general election. Sorry, evangelical buddies, you will now get about as much as you ever actually get from the Republicans. But maybe Mitt Romney will have a proper Easter celebration at least, not like that atheist Muslin and his fat-ass wife in there now. [HuffPo]

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  • This is good news for Joe Miller.

    • HippieEsq

      Oh yeah, him…He was on TV recently. An actual network. He sounds as crazy as he looks.

      I was thinking….how much of this Murkowski touchy-feely common sense is driven by an urge to be in constant conflict with Palin-ites?

      • PNWTom

        It's more driven by an urge to fuck with the political party that allowed Joe to win a primary against her, and then threw her under the bus by supporting that fuckwit over her. While Lisa M. may not have acquired her Senate seat under the most wholesome of circumstances, by 2013 she will take over from OIympia Snowe as "most reasonable Republican Senator." Strange, but true.

  • Doktor StrangeZoom

    Oh dear–Lisa Murkowski's a RINO now. She said things that are true, but that the Christian Taliban won't like. Lucky for her the seat is safe from primary until 2016; god only knows how insane The Base will be by then.

    • Trannysurprise

      Duke/Phelps 2016!

    • RINO now? How do you think she got to be a write-in candidate in the first place?

      • Doktor StrangeZoom

        Oh, dear–I just googled "Lisa Murkowski RINO" and was set straight. My fave was the one predicting that immediately upon being sworn in, she'd "switch her party to DemonRAT"

      • PNWTom

        Epic Win.

    • Wile E. Quixote

      What I love is that Lisa Murkowski is in a position where she can tell the Republican base to go fuck themselves. The Republican base chose Sarah Palin's boy toy, Joe Miller, in 2010 and Murkowski beat him as a write-in candidate.

      • PNWTom

        This is exactly right. (I used to be an Alaskan. I was able to escape, but still know what's up.)

  • DaRooster

    "We already knew that Lisa Murkowski almost instantly regretted joining ranks with her GOPpy fellows on the Blunt Amendment…"

    "Almost instantly regretted?" If all of your friends were jumping off a bridge… I mean seriously, being a politician does NOT mean you have to throw all of your logic out the window. Grow a pair and do the right thing… not just the Right thing.

    • clblabin

      Now we see why America "almost instantly regretted" letting Alaska into the Union.

  • CivicHoliday

    How long until she runs as an independent?

    • Terry

      Remember that she was re-elected via write in votes this last go-round.

      • larrykat

        And everybody got cool bracelets with her name on it so they could spell it.

  • ThundercatHo

    Who else wants to see Sen. Lisa kick the ass of Granny Sarah in a cage match?

    • Terry

      Sarah would try to cut her with a knife she smuggled into the ring, then when she's called on having an illegal advantage, Sarah would quit the match.

    • sullivanst

      Don't forget, the Murkowski family's the reason we have Sarah Palin – it was the utter sleaziness of her father appointing her to his old Senate seat that set the stage for him to lose the next Gubernatorial primary to Snowbilly.

      Well, that, and the gubernatorial Westwind II he bought himself.

    • I thought the election of 2010 was the cage match as Lisa whomped Sarah's proxy Thug Life Joe Miller as an "independent."

    • realmurkin

      Yes, please.

  • FNMA

    "Lisa Murkowski will now be Mitt Romney’s vice presidential nominee…"

    Another Alaskan on the GOP ticket? What could possibly go wrong?

    • Will never happen. I think that would get the Crazy Base actively working against Mitt, possibly even putting up a 3rd Party Nutjob. Mitt's stuck having to pick somebody toeing the party line on all issues, but perhaps appearing not to be insane. Good luck finding 'em, Mittens!

      • Terry

        Lisa's conservative but not insane, which means she has no appeal at ALL for the GOP base.

    • LagunaB

      For Mitten's VP I'm going with Nimrata Nikki Randhawa Haley.
      Going rogue!

  • Data Exactly

    I wouldn't mind it if she pulled the car over on me – if you know what I mean!

  • Schmannnity

    What? Everyone in Alaska isn't a lunatic?

    • larrykat

      I don't get it – she USED to be a lunatic. I guess being in mortal combat with the Palin flying monkeys has refocused her!

  • DaRooster

    Adrienne Barbeau needs to smile more.

    • MrFizzy

      And flash those giant Alaskan hogans for the camera.

    • Adrienne Barbeau needs to run down the beach in glorious, rolling slow motion on "Battle Of The Network Stars" more.

      • DaRooster

        She is still pretty darned hot… just Bar-beautiful…

    • Not_So_Much

      This version of her needs more skin for her head. Seems like it's too tight.

  • Giveusabob

    Pretty sure K-Lo is a twit more than 17times daily, unless she's spiking her Zima mimosas with Miracle Grow or something.

    • bikerlaureate

      Zimamosa sounds disgusting.

      • Giveusabob

        Indeed. You add the Miracle Grow to cut it.

  • OC_Surf_Serf

    War on the War on Women

    So is this WWWI or we on to WWWII? WWWIII?

    • Callyson

      The GOP has always been at War on Women, so I think we're calling this the Great WWW. Like how WWI was the Great War until WWII came along.

      • sullivanst

        Only when they weren't calling it "The War To End All Wars". Oops.

  • Penngy Nooninshire does not approve of wandering off the reservation, dear. Now be a good egg and fill Auntie Peggy's glass– and don't bogart the good scotch this time.

  • MrFizzy

    Isn't that the creature that crawled out of John Hurt's abdomen in Alien?

  • smitallica

    Memo to Sister Sarah:

    THIS is what going rogue looks like.

    Also, you're a bitch.

    • Negropolis

      Memo to Sister Sarah:

      THIS is what going rogue looks like.


  • Weenus299

    When you have your father's face and tenacity in politics, are you a woman?

    • Guppy

      According to whom, Donald Trump?

  • Biff

    Squirrel, blind nut, etc.

    • Dashboard Buddha

      I was about to get all, "wow…a principled Republican. What planet did I wake up on?" Then I read your comment and reality doped-slapped be back into the real world. Thanks.

  • Homer & the rest of the Kenai does hide a surprising number of liberals. Perhaps with a more libertarian bent that the urban variety, but in the liberal direction none the less.

    The key demographic is that Homer,and a lot of the other towns on the Kenai, have as many bars as they do churches. Not sure if this is the result of city permitting requirements or happenstance, but seems so often to be the case.

    • Terry

      I actually attended a Rotary Club meeting in Homer a few years back. The membership was a fabulous mix of libertarians and hippies, all actually respectful of each other.

      • Same deal in Seward, Ketchikan, Juneau, 'n such. Anchorage is, however, is a somewhat dirtier and more alcoholic petite version of Houston. Oil bidness or GTFO.

        • Terry

          The oil people in Alaska remind me of the British people in colonies such as India. Go there a few years, make scads of money and live the high life, dabble a bit in politics (just enough to screw things up for the locals), never consider sending your kids to the local colleges, then haul ass back where they came from.

          • sullivanst

            I expect a few of them are Brits who still think of the US as the colonies…

            I mean, BP does have a big slice of the North Slope pie.

  • bikerlaureate

    I don't know about this implication that men should actually listen to their wimminfolk. Sounds French-like to me.

  • WiscDad

    Maybe she's a double-headed secret agent of feminism. I know you can't tell by looking but she looks like she might be :)

  • Biff

    She'll be hung out to dry in Homer, with her dick in the wind.

  • chascates

    Wow, she looks only slightly better than Bella Abzug!

  • hollywooddood

    She just doesn't want to lose the slut vote.

  • MrFizzy

    Blago has to be envious of that hair.

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    We've always been at war with the war on women.

  • Oblios_Cap

    But maybe Mitt Romney will have a proper Easter celebration at least

    What do the Moroni worshippers do for Easter? Dead-baptize some Jooz?

    • FNMA

      No, for Passover.

  • Mahousu

    OK, so the Republicans are losing the war on women, and the war on caterpillars, and so far haven't even been able to have a war with Iran – what war can they win?

    Aside from the war on common sense, that is, which is really more like Division III play than a real war.

    • Chichikovovich

      Remembering what things looked like last December, I'm pretty sure they're winning the War on Christmas. I even said "Merry Christmas" a bunch of times myself, fifth columnist that I am.

      [Around here that seems to be an infallible test for wingnutism: Everybody wishes everybody else a Merry Christmas (though of course care is taken not to direct such greetings at Jews, Muslims, etc.) But when the wingnuts do it, they have this defiant look on their faces, jaws jut forward, as if by saying this they are as brave as the Danish resistance spiriting Jews to Sweden under the Nazi's noses.]

  • freakishlywrong

    Republics do realize that their woman folk take the pill and get mammos, right? They also get "d&cs", instead of what the poors and the blacks get, which are "abortions".

  • But K-Lo does not have a wife and daughters, Murkowski!

    I wonder why?

  • SheriffJoeBiden

    Could it be that we are witnessing a watershed moment in American conservatism, when the first few smart Republicans (with or without a conscience) are realizing, as the Democrats did in the 1960's, that long-lasting political majorities can't be built by catering to the most ignorant, barely-human bigots in the entire country? That the pendulum of social history really does swing father to the liberal side every time it swings? … Nah, probably not.

    • fuflans

      oh please.

      and if romney loses the election, i guaran-fucking -tee you they'll take exactly the wrong lesson from it.

      • Callyson

        November 1, 2012:

        Cue Frothy Mix and the like gabbing "we lost because we weren't true to our principles" in 3…2…1…

  • el_donaldo

    Romney's going to "pivot away from wackjob"? I don't think so. Ten to one he doubles down on it and campaigns on mandatory uteri inspections and stockades for sluts.

  • tessiee

    Jeeeezus, she looks like a velociraptor.

    • ElPinche

      RINOsaurus rex

    • sullivanst

      She's the absolute spitting image of Cruella de Vil. Even has the white streak developing.

      Come to think of it, have they ever been seen in the same room together?

    • Guppy

      Lizard person.

  • Chichikovovich

    "Murkowski criticized GOP presidential candidates for not condemning Rush Limbaugh for calling Georgetown law student Sandra Fluke a “slut” and a “prostitute,” which he later apologized for."

    Câlisse. This again.

    Dear Hack Journalists of America:

    That Limbaugh used those words was the least of his offenses. That's one reason why, in the mealymouthed hemi-demi-semi-apology that he was forced to make in a hope of stemming the stampede of fleeing advertisers, he spoke *only* about using those words. As an effort to divert people and leave the impression that that was what he needed to apologize for. The problem was that he went on for three days of three unbroken hours falsely stating that Fluke had discussed her own sex life and need for birth control during the testimony, rather than the health care needs of students she knew. And saying that Fluke must have had so much sex that she could barely walk. And demanding that Fluke post sex tapes of herself on the internet. And on and on.

    Here's a little test: Take Bill Maher's much-condemned-by-the-right remarks, and replace the words "twat", and "cunt" and whatever other gutter talk he used with "despicable person", and "creep". What do you have? No loss of content in what Maher said, and nothing making an apology necessary. That's what happens when the words are all that people need to apologize for: remove the words, remove the offence.

    Now take Rush's words and replace "slut" with "woman of loose virtue" and "prostitute" with "woman of negotiable affection". What he said is every bit as revolting after the substitution. That's what happens when the words are not what demand apology.

    • Callyson


  • mavenmaven

    Clinton/Murkowski 2016!


    So they hire people for 8 Hrs. but control their lives 24 Hr/day. And in the name of freedom!

  • fuflans

    yes but not at all like 'activist judges overturning a law passed by a majority of both chambers of a duly elected legislature.'

  • fuflans

    she looks pretty in that picture.

    that is all i have to say on this topic.

    • Negropolis

      Pretty what?

  • Callyson

    OK, Senator, I look forward to seeing the legislation and other concrete *action* that you will be taking to back up these nice words. Because I'm sure you are not just parroting this out in a damage control attempt or anything…

  • owhatever

    The bitch to nowhere.

  • DahBoner


    What's the frequency, Kenneth????

  • larrykat

    Lisa, we hardly knew ye. You seem so…. sane.

  • Bananas Foster

    According to 538, Murkowski still votes in line with Trump’s agenda 88.6 percent of the time.

    Let’s not get carried away.

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