REEFER MADNESS  8:36 pm April 3, 2012

Attorney General Eric Holder Raids Dope School, So Tired Of Only Being Hated By Right

by Erik Jay

Pretty babiesWith all of the Wall Street criminals taking Monday off, and apparently just sick and fucking tired of only being despised by gun nuts on the right, Attorney General Eric Holder sent his G-men in to bother a bunch of fucking hippies at Oaksterdam University. Joined by forces not ratified in the Constitution, and conveniently ignoring a little thing Southerners, Santorum, and racists (same thing) like to yammer on about (i.e. “states rights”), they set out with their $800 government hammers to crash their way through the doors of some of the world’s most dangerous pot growing teachers. Three local buildings were raided, with harshed witnesses watching agents load up their vans with sweet fucking bud and shit from the school. Oaksterdam president Richard Lee also found himself playing host to agents at his home the same morning. IRS spokeswoman Arlette Lee said a search warrant was being served and the probe was under seal in a Northern District Court. Attempts to get a hold of the IRS for further comment were met with a wait time greater than fifteen hours. Apparently Oaksterdam and Mr. Lee have been under double secret probation this entire semester.

Holder, who once promised to leave the dirty fucking hippies alooooone, is apparently now taking cues from Michele Leonhart, a soft hearted DEA boss who is also a humanitarian hellbent on helping old people stop not hurting from pain medication in nursing homes (even if they have their doctor’s prescription in hand) and also happens to be the person who unlocked the hammer cabinet for Monday’s raid. Leonhart is no stranger to marijuana thug life. As a former Baltimore cop she has seen the pot labs explode and kill for miles around, and as she became the DEA big dog she saw the horrors of marijuana once again when David Koresh smoked marijuana for the first time. She only intends to become more aggressive.

In defense of this administration’s aggressive marijuana policies, it should be pointed out that not one marijuana induced suicide bombing has not happened since Obama took office and that accidental related marijuana baby microwaving has been non-existent. [MSNBC]

 
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{ 317 comments }

johnnymeatworth April 3, 2012 at 8:40 pm

To add insult to injury, they also confiscated every Flaming Lips album on campus.

Ruhe April 4, 2012 at 6:47 am

There's a lesson there for everyone who joins Federal Law enforcement "because you cannot know yourself or what you'd really do…with all your power."

actor212 April 4, 2012 at 9:58 am

That's so dope!

Sassomatic April 3, 2012 at 8:42 pm

I don't understand. I thought black people loved weed.

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 8:42 pm

Obummer, dude.

OzoneTom April 3, 2012 at 8:43 pm

Thankfully there was nothing more important for law enforcement to do in Oakland yesterday.

Crank_Tango April 3, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Yeah it was a pretty quiet day here otherwise. Oh wait, no it wasn't.

rocktonsam April 3, 2012 at 9:39 pm

it was NPR's third story this morning.

GUNS FOR EVERYONE!!

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 10:27 pm

♫ Raaape, mur-der, it's just a puff away, it's just a PUFF away. ♫

LettucePrey April 3, 2012 at 8:43 pm

A higher authority, indeed.

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 8:44 pm

OT: Conservative "Girl on Girl on Girl" violence:
Malkin criticizes Coulter for criticizing Palin.

Who'd have thought Coulter would be at the top of THAT food chain?

CZL April 3, 2012 at 8:59 pm

I generally assume Coulter tops Malkin all the time.

Boojum April 3, 2012 at 9:30 pm

And, strangely, I have no desire to watch.

Angry_Marmot April 3, 2012 at 9:45 pm

♫ Peg o' My Heart… ♪

weejee April 3, 2012 at 9:11 pm

More like three missing links. They all knew Lucy back in the day.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 9:34 pm

"Begun, the Clam Wars have."
- Yoda

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 10:30 pm

"Girl on Girl on Girl"

Close but no cigar. You need a 70, not a 66, on your med boards to pass and become a gynecologist.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Erik Jay….I get it.

savethispatient April 3, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Mary's brother!

weejee April 3, 2012 at 9:12 pm

And isn't Mary a Jain?

LettucePrey April 3, 2012 at 9:00 pm

I hear it's an ongoing joint investigation.

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Going along at quite a clip.

trampndirtdown April 3, 2012 at 11:51 pm

Going to blow the lid off.

Sharkey April 3, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Putting a space in there really seals it for me.

gullywompr April 3, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Gee whiz, Obama, are you trying to hand the election to Ron Paul?

freddymcmurray April 3, 2012 at 8:51 pm

pass the duchie on the lefthand side. oops, nevermind

KennyFuckingPowers April 3, 2012 at 8:52 pm

I'm getting too old for this shit. I am not a fucking criminal.
Turn me, loose set me free, anywhere but Montana.

FROTHY April 4, 2012 at 3:45 am

Movin' to Montana soon
Gonna be a dental floss tycoon …

chascates April 3, 2012 at 8:54 pm

I wanted to enroll this past month (one month intensive course) but didn't have the money. (If it took a nickel to go 'round the world I couldn't get out of sight!) Oaksterdam U has Ed Rosenthal as a teacher; he's written many books on pot growing and has a column in High Times or one of those mags. The tuition was low, they guaranteed you a job as an intern and would easily get you a med-pot card. All types of cultivation are covered: hydroponic or dirt, sea of green, cloning techniques, etc.
With the fed crackdowns this past year enrollment had really dropped off. When even Pat Robertson argues for decriminalization this administration is trying its hardest to alienate those who helped elect it.
http://www.oaksterdamuniversity.com/semester.html

Lascauxcaveman April 4, 2012 at 1:08 am

Seriously, WTF.

Be cool, Barry. It's not like underage drinking or anything.

FROTHY April 4, 2012 at 3:47 am

I'm just about ready to give up. Birth control is not MY problem, and I'm not gonna be around long enough to worry about how much RMONEY fucks over the 99%. All I want is the right to use weed for my pain instead of something that leaves me zombified and costs nearly ten times what my good weed does.

Barrelhse April 4, 2012 at 10:49 am

Chemo- all my hair fell out, chronic fatigue, NO appetite. The weed made me hungry enough to drink some Ensure, but I still lost 20 lbs.
Real criminals must be overjoyed to see that law enforcement has chosen to waste time and resources on harassing sitting ducks, rather than tackle any truly harmful criminal activity. Choosing to enforce the easy stuff is not impressive law enforcement.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 8:54 pm

What are they doing now that they weren't doing in 2007? If this place is so evil, why didn't they nip it in the bud, so to speak?

That and … jerbs creator!!

weejee April 3, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Ask not for whom the bong tolls.

Blueb4sunrise April 3, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Is this the Primary Live-Bong thread?

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Vaporize It.

orygoon April 3, 2012 at 8:57 pm

They'll still be hated by the right, and everybody with the sense that God gave little ducks knows that.

Money from pharma, maybe, for blowing up the weed?

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 10:21 pm

That stinks like a tinfoil wingnuts' taint (guessing). But I can't think of any better reason. Obama already had to make a deal with them not to tackle drug prices in the ACA (3-legged stool: 1) Healthcare Providers 2) Insurance Companies 3) Drug Companies — take out one of those legs so they don't gang up on the legislation and spend tens-of-millions on negative ads during the ACA's passage through Congress). Maybe this is residuals of that deal, or a new one? I don't like feeling like the mirror opposite of a Paultard.

BerkeleyBear April 3, 2012 at 11:33 pm

I think it had more to do with the head dude at the U's overt pro-legalization/bend the medicinal rules to the breaking point stance than pure politics. Dude sorta blazed out a "come and get me" smoke signal, and the DOJ bit.

imissopus April 3, 2012 at 11:48 pm

If I'm not mistaken, that dude was the one who got the proposition to legalize weed on the CA ballot in 2010, despite resistance from pro-legalization groups who thought he was picking the wrong time and wrong way to push the issue. The guy seems to care more about the glory of being the person who gets it legalized, which of course makes it less likely to happen.

Lascauxcaveman April 4, 2012 at 1:18 am

We have the same debate going on in the Soviet of Washington (State). We've got heavy hitters in the State Leg trying to out-and-out legalize weed (screw the Feds; legalize and TAX it) and long-time medical and de-criminalize people shouting "No! No!"

People are almost as nuts about this stupid, little, tiny insignificant thing as they are about the controversial (but statistically insignificant) issue of abortion. I don't know about the rest you, but I want my roads properly paved and my public schools properly funded. I don't want you legislators to waste my time or tax dollars on the idiotic witch hunt stuff.

Jesus, people are fucking stupid.

I can't wait for baseball season to start.

FROTHY April 4, 2012 at 3:48 am

Tobacco and AgPharma working in concert.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Amsterdam = "Don't euthanize me" bracelets
Oaksterdam = "Don't confiscate my stash" bracelets

Sharkey April 3, 2012 at 9:31 pm

I hate to alarm you, but my stash just got euthanized.

Crank_Tango April 3, 2012 at 10:04 pm

Thank Jeebus it's a renewable resource.

donner_froh April 3, 2012 at 8:59 pm

When Michele Leonhart flunked out of Bonghalationn Therapy school there was no looking back.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:00 pm

I just got the memo! Rebecca got her dispensary license and now we can trade our p-points for weed!

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 9:08 pm

No, really Barb, I've got glaucoma….Honest.

Crank_Tango April 3, 2012 at 9:20 pm

Please don't bogart it all, your Royal P-Ness.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:23 pm

Oh Crank! I only plan to give Rebecca a little of my p-ness at a time.

Crank_Tango April 3, 2012 at 9:28 pm

Don't we all!

Just the tip, I swear, also.

Boojum April 3, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Not me. Sorry, but I don't have as much as Barb.

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 10:37 pm

Run, Rebecca, run – Barb plans to drop a little p on you!!

Unless, you know, you like that kind of kink.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Rebecca is more "kinks than vanilla"

LastGasp April 3, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Let's see — Barack Obama, George Bush, and Bill Clinton are all known to have used non state-sanctioned consciousness-altering substances. Gives a new meaning to the phrase "The highest office in the land."

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 10:38 pm

When's Barry gonna start raiding the Lucky Strike factories?

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:02 pm

I fucking hate pot, I hate the smell, I hate how I feel when smoke it, I hate those lunatics who smoke a joint upon waking and I loathe being around a bunch of people when they are high. Still love me Wonkette?

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:03 pm

Uh, oh! Ignore the "free pot" post I made above. I still love ya!

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:07 pm

We can have the booze party in a separate room. No prob.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:34 pm

I don't drink either!

iburl April 3, 2012 at 9:35 pm

Adam Ant?

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:40 pm

No, Mormon…..just kidding.

LettucePrey April 3, 2012 at 9:38 pm

Okay, now you've lost me.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:45 pm

Very rarely, but MrLimeylizzie is a recovering alcoholic, so seems unfair to be boozing it up around him, so I just don't bother anymore.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Oh!Actually, I don't either.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:52 pm

Sister Wife!

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Me neither. I break out in handcuffs.

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Reminds me of the Norfolk State College in Virginia football cheer: "We don't drink, we don't smoke, Norfolk, Norfolk!"

imissopus April 3, 2012 at 11:32 pm

Believe me, as a native of that area, that chant is not exclusive to Norfolk State.

C_R_Eature April 4, 2012 at 6:30 am

Navy personnel stationed there refer to it as "Nofuck, Vagina."

LettucePrey April 3, 2012 at 9:10 pm

Well, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

(Seriously, though, I upfist you. I've smoked pot maybe four times in my life and hated every time. I hate the smell and don't like being around people who are high. But I live in San Francisco and go to Burning Man and worship The Big Lebowski. Some battles just aren't worth fighting.)

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Yes, I have smoked it maybe a half dozen times and I just can't stand it.

HippieEsq April 3, 2012 at 10:15 pm

Try sitting?

And…mom is that you?

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:19 pm

I think it is my fault as the first drug I ever tried was acid, I was 14, and went to a club and got very, very paranoid, so after that I just wasn't particularly interested in any of them.

doloras April 4, 2012 at 2:13 am

That's exactly what Frank Zappa said.

C_R_Eature April 4, 2012 at 6:33 am

That's true and it really Freaked Out some people on the mountain.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Fondles her orbs, lovingly….”Yep. still there”.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:39 pm

Mine too, right up front where I left them.

Lucidamente1 April 3, 2012 at 9:36 pm

Always.

Biff April 3, 2012 at 9:41 pm

If you weren't already married, I'd ask for your hand. What the hell, all the other parts, too. I hate the shit out of that shit! I hate the laws against it, though, too. Also.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:44 pm

Yay Biff!!! We are the killjoys.

Biff April 3, 2012 at 9:57 pm

But I certainly don't want to impose on anyone else's right to enjoy it. Same with booze, don't like it myself, but you're more than welcome to it, and I know how to avoid that which I don't like…

Angry_Marmot April 3, 2012 at 10:01 pm

But I am inordinately fond of old dope songs from the Thirties and Forties.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:09 pm

I like filthy blues, myself.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cr6xjWEYGSs

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 9:42 pm

'Course, we love you, how could we not?

I haven't smoked dope in 15 years of so – P tests put a stop to that. I kinda miss mushrooms, especially in the field, on fantastic sunny days like today, I drink and it's fun but I could take it or leave it.
However, you can have my Coffee when you pry it out of my Cold Dead Hands.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 9:54 pm

I love the java more than life itself. A lovely medium-deep roast, low-acidity and full-bodied, much like myself come to think of it.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 10:03 pm

Ahhhhhh, one of the Morning's wonderful pleasures. I brook no Adulterants. Pure, Hot and Black. As it should be.
I mail order Kona beans from Barry's birthplace for special occasions. Like Sundays.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:14 pm

A dash of milk for me, but I like my coffee really strong .

Monsieur_Grumpe April 3, 2012 at 9:58 pm

I haven't smoked a joint in years myself. Never found it habit worthy and when you sing for living it is real hard on the throat. Mushrooms however… good thing they are hard to come by.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Yeah, I always thought smoking sucked and don't miss it at all. Mushrooms…They were so much fun an Age of the World ago. I've probably accumulated so many psychological scars that I just wouldn't be able to enjoy them any more.

Loaded_Pants April 3, 2012 at 10:41 pm

What I hated about weed was it made me paranoid & then I would get the munchies from hell. If I didn't eat everything I could find in the fridge or cupboard, I ended up going to a local fast food joint & eating food that would tear up my digestive system for the next day or so. However, the potheads I knew were more fun to be around than some of the people I knew who were drinkers who turned mean after a few drinks.
Oh, the memories. At least it was before such shit like Meth & Oxycontin had entered the area where I was living at the time.
Too many people I used to know from that time & place are now either dead or in prison. I'm glad I managed to not get too swept up in it.

ThundercatHo April 3, 2012 at 11:17 pm

Why wouldn't we love you? Being pro-choice is about more than having a punch card down at the Abortionplex. I happen to love pot, the smell, the taste, how I feel when I smoke it. I haven't been able to for some time tho' d/t having kids and being a responsible parent, etc. Since I am a total lightweight when it comes to alcohol (1 drink limit) and don't really like being around people who are shitfaced it was a way to participate in my younger days.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 11:42 pm

I adore you for “Punch-card down at the Abortionplex”.

imissopus April 3, 2012 at 11:40 pm

Well, I like weed. I never have it around the house anymore because a) I'm a broke-ass poor and b) I go through occasional phases of heavy exercising that include three-mile runs and I like to have my lungs clear for that, but otherwise I would buy it and put myself to sleep some nights smoking a bowl and watching Adult Swim. But you're still okay, LL.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 12:57 am

Well, I suppose the defining question is: do you think that people who don't agree with you (including those lunatics) belong in jail?

Limeylizzie April 4, 2012 at 2:10 am

No, I would have no friends.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 2:42 am

Then this Wonker still loves you.

Limeylizzie April 4, 2012 at 2:57 am

I am totally in favour of it being legalised, I just wish they could get rid of the smell!

Lascauxcaveman April 4, 2012 at 1:30 am

I am just OK with all recreational drugs. But being of abnormally robust constitution, I've tried most of them, found them amusing, and and none have become the master of me.

You just have to decide exactly how much of your life you wish to spend intoxicated, that's all. For me it's only between dinner and bed time. And not every day. There is a life to be lived, after all.

FROTHY April 4, 2012 at 4:09 am

No. I used to, but.

Of course, I use it only for pain (srsly. I used to love getting high as a yoof, but once you grow up and have shit you need to do, getting high is not so fun any more, or not for me, anyway, because I'd rather take care of shit before it turns into a crisis, and I can't do that if I'm ripped). These days, I use a fixed, tiny amount each day, and ONLY for pain, and I find I can function quite well that way. Much better than being on painkillers all the time.

So, I'm sorry, darling, it's over.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 8:48 am

With a 34G super structure, of course we'll still ….. Wait! are those things staring at me? Where ever I go in this room they're staring at me!

Toomush_Infer April 4, 2012 at 9:42 am

Just for the record – I love the idea of your orbs, just like the idea of pot, like the idea of heaven….us oldz can only get to the second Cuba Libre before it's naptime again….

Limeylizzie April 4, 2012 at 9:50 am

MrLL is an oldz, quite a bit older than I am, and when he starts to nap I whip off my bra and do the “nipple tassel dance” . He enjoys the orbs as well.

FlownOver April 4, 2012 at 10:12 am

Hell, I start nodding after the second Pauli NA. Altering your consciousness is a young man's game.

realmurkin April 3, 2012 at 9:05 pm

Weed libel!

Negropolis April 3, 2012 at 9:09 pm

I can't for the life of me figure out why they are still doing this. The administration has been doing this since they got into office. Until our AG here in Michigan came in and basically holed-up the medical marijuana advocates, it was the Obama administration that'd been doing consistent intimidation raids.

This isn't even politically smart, anymore, so it makes even less sense. If there are any issues running quickly to the left in the past decade, it is the equality movement and the decriminalization movement.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Hon, have you been over here http://wonkette.com/468915/bipartisan-michigan-la
to see what Fakakta South has for you?

Negropolis April 3, 2012 at 9:31 pm

I'll go take a look. I usually start at the top of the page and descend when I get here.

Wile E. Quixote April 3, 2012 at 9:21 pm

It's because they're a fucking bunch of dicks. Most of our law-enforcement apparatus is completely useless, but in order to look as if they're actually doing something to earn the money that they steal from us they occasionally have to have a big raid like this one, otherwise someone might eventually say "Who are these fuckheads and why are we paying them so goddamned much money?"

Chichikovovich April 3, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Also (not sure of this, but pretty sure) it's a huge money-maker. Any cash found on the premises can be seized and used by the force. Roof leaking in the agency squash courts? TV in the lounge looking a bit old? No money in the budget for repairs or new TV's? Raid a drug den!

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 10:32 pm

Vegas bash for the GSA?

An_Outhouse April 4, 2012 at 8:56 am

Is there anything easier than busting stoned people?

Boojum April 3, 2012 at 9:34 pm

It's in the Alinsky book. Best way to change a bad law is to strictly enforce it.

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 11:01 pm

We just have to bide our time here, Grop. Some of the other people on teh Wonkette has assured us that Barry will go all radically liberal after the election when he doesn't have to worry about being re-elected, and I'm sure marijuana legalization is one of the things that will magically happen because he's just biding his time until he can reveal that he actually is a secret Saul Alinsky, Bill Ayers, and Stokely Carmichael all wrapped up in one.

iburl April 4, 2012 at 1:33 am

Who are these people? Really? There are still people who think Obama has the Librul burning a hole in his back pocket? I mean, I know the GOP does, I know Newt Gingrich has warned us of the coming Marxist Takeover that a 2nd Obama administration would be, but, seriously, Wonketters that still have not figured out that Obama is a center-right mainstream Democrat at heart?

Negropolis April 4, 2012 at 2:58 am

I just said this downthread, but this 11 dimensional chess conjecture/conspiracy is really starting to get old. the game only makes sense when you're trying to co-opt an idea where the conservatives are firmly in control. We're talking about decriminalization for medical use, not even just general decriminalization.

Here in Michigan, this thing passed by 60+%, meaning that it isn't even a partisan issue in most of the states that pass it. This enforcement simply doesn't make any kind of political sense, and not even any policy sense. The feds should not be fucking with this. They should have kept to their cease-fire. If Republican governors want to fuck around and oppress, that's one thing. This administration should not be a party to something where they are going to end up on the wrong side of history. And, again, this doesn't even make sense from a policy standpoint because Republicans governors and legislatures in states with decriminalization for medical use are already fucking with patients, caregivers and the community in general. The Obama administration should not be doing their work.

PuckStopsHere April 3, 2012 at 11:51 pm

Fuck that pin dick Bill Shutte or however in the fuck the priss spells his name.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 1:55 am

I hate to say this, but I've come to suspect that the President is exhibiting what I call Guilty Parent Syndrome. I've seen this in quite a few of my fellow Boomers and post-Boomers (I'm an oldish parent, so most of the parents of my kids' contemporaries are Xers).

It runs something like: I did various recreational substances when I was younger, and it was even sometimes pretty cool; but the drugz made it hard for me to excel at what I wanted to do (strong form: almost snared me into a lifetime of addiction); so my children must be protected from the temptation, even if that means imprisoning a lot of other peoples' children for doing what I once did.

Guilty Parent Syndrome can be a really powerful motivator. Coupled with forty years worth of institutionalized Drug Warriorness (which has its own motivations, most of them financial), we get business as usual.

I admire President Obama, but there are points upon which we disagree. The "mini-surge" in Afghanistan was one, but there it appears that he may have emerged from the Pentagon's spell. The Drug War is another, and there — unfortunately — it appears that his position is unchanging.

GunToting[Redacted] April 4, 2012 at 10:19 am

Um, Barry is the prez… I understand your key point, but does this mean that if Barry didn't blaze he'd be emperor of the universe by now?

angerbear April 3, 2012 at 9:10 pm

It's weird how reefer madness seems to manifest most acutely in people who don't smoke pot.

Negropolis April 3, 2012 at 9:32 pm

Crazy, innit? Never smoked a thing in my life (asthamtic, here), but there is something deeply unfair about this particular prohibition.

weejee April 3, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Were Brewer and Shipley deans?

littlebigdaddy April 4, 2012 at 12:17 am

Wow, obscure album rock ref from the late 70s ftw.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 12:59 am

Now, that's over the line.

Major Thom April 4, 2012 at 9:54 am

Only one toke.

smokefilledroommate April 3, 2012 at 9:18 pm

Legalize it, man. Don't criticize it. And for fuck's sake don't destroy it.

weejee April 3, 2012 at 9:21 pm

Frothy in front in Wisconsin. Wait & see if Mittens squeaks or wails in Waukesha.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:22 pm

Santorum is giving his no-concession concession speech in Butler, PA. Ever been to Butler? If not, save yourself the trip.

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 11:02 pm

Is the Butler anywhere near Intercourse?

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 11:34 pm

No. Butler is a boring ex-urb north of Pittsburgh. No funny business going on there.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 5:26 am

Yes. Several times. Mostly forgettable. For purely aesthetic insanity Butler decided to create a memorial to those who worked the factories during WWII building the Jeep. In the park (across from where I first saw Annie Hall) they put up the memorial; a Jeep. On at least two occasions I swiped a parking ticket off a car parked on the street and put it on the memorial as in "Illegally parked on the grass."

This is the town in which Santorum grew up. Explains a lot.

Negropolis April 3, 2012 at 9:22 pm

OT: Oh fuck, Santorum is babbling, again. If I hear "liberty" one more time…

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:26 pm

He just admitted he grew up in "government housing on VA property." So that kind of welfare is OK, huh? As long as you're not blah, I guess.

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 9:31 pm

He prides himself on his ability to speak without prepared text, but his speeches really suck.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 9:43 pm

I thought he was saying "Puberty".

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 10:06 pm

Give me puberty or give me death!

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 10:10 pm

All Hail the Statue of Puberty!

Doktor StrangeZoom April 3, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Give me your gangly, your pimply, your awkward masses yearning to cop a feel…

chascates April 3, 2012 at 9:23 pm

And for a brief time some med pot workers were eligible to join the Teamsters (2010):
Under the two-year contract, the company will pay for the workers' health care costs. The workers will receive pensions under the Western Conference of Pensions Fund, and their wages, currently at $18 an hour, will increase to $25.75 an hour within 15 months. They also get 10 paid holidays and 60 hours of personal time per year.

With apologies to Little Milton, if that isn't heaven then grits ain't groceries and Mona Lisa was a man.

iburl April 3, 2012 at 9:26 pm

I was already hating Holder for his bullshit excuses as to why this and all future American presidents have the right to declare other Americans "terrorists" and have them (and their children, evidently) killed on the spot, disappeared, held without trial, etc., etc., etc..

I'm sure that these God-like powers will never be abused by some future, less cuddly president.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Holder has been the biggest disappointment to me of anyone in the Obama cabinet.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Rahm, Summers and Jeff Zients ain't far behind.

TheGyrus April 3, 2012 at 10:00 pm

I've been assuming the "fast and furious" investigations by the Republican house members was just bullshit Republican politics as usual. But, fuck it, I hope they take him down.

sbj1964 April 3, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Pot is a Gateway drug,for those who one day want to be able to afford a Coke habbit.Why are the 1% trying to keep the rest of us down?

Lascauxcaveman April 4, 2012 at 1:36 am

I used to smoke pot, and I can assure you, it ain't a gateway to anything bu overeating and nap time.

Toomush_Infer April 4, 2012 at 9:43 am

I usually wait until Coke goes on sale at Walmart…

prommie April 4, 2012 at 9:57 am

The really wealthy can afford to develop heroin habits. It is apparently a pleasant substance, as long as you never have to be anywhere and can afford unlimited quantities.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:36 pm

Romney sweeps all 3 states! He mopped up the floor with Santorum.

Lucidamente1 April 3, 2012 at 9:39 pm

Fire up a spliff?

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 9:44 pm

That's exactly backwards. Santorum first, then mopping.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Barb, that was liveblogging with ruthless efficiency. No Wolf. No King…..here King, here King. No Erin Burnout. Thank You.

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Erin Burnout – lol. Teehe-ahahaahaa

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Smoke it up. Smoke it up.

Crank_Tango April 4, 2012 at 2:18 am

That's certainly no way to get the floor clean, but then again mopping is just a primitive form of bending.

rocktonsam April 3, 2012 at 9:37 pm

"pot labs explode and kill for miles."

where? who?

I'm really to stone to check the googlez and find the frick out

cripes

Boojum April 3, 2012 at 9:38 pm

If the law weren't enforced, who would want to change it? If it were only (still) enforced against the blahs, would Pat Robertson care? Give Hopey some credit; he's just spreading the enforcement around to Ritz cracker country, y'all.

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 10:09 pm

I agree. He took a similar tack with DADT.

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 11:19 pm

Speaking of Pat, about 15 yrs ago a buddy and I were watching 700 Club one night (just sorta happened) and they did the most over-the-top reenactment of a PCP freakout where a guy went on a hammer-murder rampage. In the background of his apartment was a poster of (can't remember, let's say… Mona Lisa smoking a joint?). I looked over at my buddy's apartment wall and there was that very same poster. We laughed! Wish I could find that clip on teh YouTubez.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 1:01 am

Oakland, CA is "Ritz cracker country"?

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:18 am

Poetic license.

Toomush_Infer April 4, 2012 at 9:45 am

Cheetoland…

Negropolis April 4, 2012 at 2:21 am

Oh, please, with this 11 dimensional chess bullshit excuse, already.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 2:36 am

No, seriously, whether it is his intention or not — and I give him credit for intelligence and book learnin' — strictly enforcing a bad law will lead to its repeal much faster than ignoring it. Particularly in this environment of everything he is for, they are against, yet they are the natural supporters of the drug laws. So, they either give him credit (not gonna happen) or they talk the need for medical marijuana and an exception to the ridiculous drug laws. Pat Robertson has started that trickle. Watch it become a flood.

Biff April 3, 2012 at 9:38 pm

Hurray for mittens, I guess, for winning the evening?

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 9:46 pm

"Dope will get you through times of no Money better than Money will get you through times of no Dope"
- Freewheelin' Franklin

rocktonsam April 3, 2012 at 9:58 pm

word

Dogless_Heathen April 3, 2012 at 10:13 pm

And a friend with weed is a friend indeed.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:19 am

With Mittens level money, there are no times of no dope.

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 9:47 pm

Listening to Paul Ryan…Whe credits it to Obama, but wasn't "uniter not a divider" a George W. Bush line?

And Ryan's reciting a "string of bumper stickers" says Maddow.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 9:52 pm

If you see this van a rocking', my dad probably moved the factory.

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Ryan also says a president shouldn't blame others, then Mitt comes on and starts blaming Obama for job losses, poverty, and gas prices.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Let's see Mitt bring this shit to the debates against President Obama*

*I'm going to do my best to call him "President Obama" I am tired of the likes of Sarah Palin, calling him "Obama"

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 10:46 pm

I kind of like taking those pointy words from wingnuts and dulling them down and keeping them. "Barry" and "Obamacare" are ones I use affectionately w/out thinking anymore. That's probably wrong.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 10:56 pm

snark off/
Paul Ryan is wrong. His budget is a travesty. An embarrassment of humanity. Tax the poor, more tax cuts for the job creators? Really? Medical coupons for for the oldz? Gut education, Social Security, the environment and science? Whilst not touching the Military-Industrial-Socialist Complex? A fascist proposal that passed the House?
Shame, shame, shame.
snark on/
Ryan/Cantor '16

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 11:05 pm

I was glad Obama called it "Social Darwinism," because that's what it is.

I can't wait to see the rightwing indignation over the use of that term in the next few days.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 11:44 pm

Srsly, BMW. Obama doesn't need a poll or consultants to call this dreck out. Teabaggers, the 1% and Palinbots are the only ones who could support this insult to reason.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:20 am

These are features, not bugs.

GunToting[Redacted] April 4, 2012 at 10:35 am

"Zombie-eyed granny starver."

randcoolcatdaddy April 3, 2012 at 9:52 pm

Obasm is obviously trying to appeal to those three voters in Chapel Hill, North Carolina that were undecided between him and Santorum.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 10:33 pm

As a native C' Hillian, I would say those guys are probably too fucked up to vote, under any circumstances.

deanbooth April 3, 2012 at 9:53 pm

You're a different kind of high, Mr. Jay.

GunToting[Redacted] April 4, 2012 at 10:36 am

Doonesbury reference?

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Mitt's victory speech is just terrible, in terms of both wording and delivery. The substance also sucks, but that's a given.

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 10:01 pm

This sounds like a convention speech. A really terrible convention speech.

ElPinche April 3, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Mitt is in serious need of a game changer, and Paul Ryan can't help that wealthy mannequin.

AddHomonym April 3, 2012 at 10:21 pm

The hostility is Gingrich-worthy. The invective is Santorum-worthy. You just beat these guys, Mitt. No need to mimic them any more.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Here's the party line from now on: Mittens is a highly advanced (and fetchingly handsome) android from planet delta in the Alpha-112005 system. He has been present on earth since earth year 1788 and particularly regrets the French Revolution. The glitches you see are due to the vast distances that communications travel between Mitt and his handlers on Alpha-112005 Delta. He will, nonetheless, lower your taxes and kill your granny, if she is on Medicare.

Negropolis April 4, 2012 at 2:16 am

Every time I'm accosted by these primary night "speeches" from him, I can't help but continue to ask myself: "This is the guy they are about to put up against the president?"

God knows that anything is possible. I mean, you get enough stupid into a proverbial room and damn-near anything is possible. But this guy makes Bob Dole and Herbert Walker look like exciting, principled visionaries. I mean, Mitt looks like a bad clone/copy of what a "good" Republican would be. You know, like the degredation you get when you copy a copy.

Toomush_Infer April 4, 2012 at 9:56 am

The problem is: over half the voting public is stupid….is there any snark that can match this reality?…

BarackMyWorld April 3, 2012 at 9:57 pm

"I'm not naive enough to believe that free enterprise is the answer to every problem."
The free-market purists just shit a brick.

Follows up with "government should be an ally of business."
Everyone should've just shit a brick.

Terry April 3, 2012 at 9:58 pm

They are a "cannabis college"? Isn't that basically sending an engraved invitation to the DEA to raid them?

commiegirl April 3, 2012 at 10:15 pm

Cause it's legal here, Terry. Or at least *it was*.

Terry April 3, 2012 at 10:21 pm

Sorry, hard to keep track.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 10:27 pm

And they've been in operation since 2007, so what's happened between now and then? Or would they prefer that medical marijuana dispensaries be staffed by people who know nothing about pot? I don't get Eric Holder. At all. Not to mention I find it hard to believe he consulted with the re-election managers before he pulled this stunt.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 10:03 pm

"Walk with me every day"? You mean with our noses up your butt the way Paul Ryan was doing at every campaign stop today? I don't think he wants the vice presidency, I think he wants to be adopted by Mitt. Or maybe gay-married?

StarsUponThars April 3, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Or Arizona.

ElPinche April 3, 2012 at 10:12 pm

*spfffffff* *hold it in*
One word: LEGAAALLLEEEYYYEZZIT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uq1lH6JNGdY&fe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgSdxhfE074

What is this ? crooks and liars n shit??

HippieEsq April 3, 2012 at 10:13 pm

The consensus from the brain trust of extremely talented and ridiculously blazed attorneys in the board room (my Patio) is that this about taxes, man. Also two of the five lawyers are dogs, but one of those is named Earl Warren so, ya know.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:23 am

Dude. Earl Warren ended segregation AND can lick his own gonads!

HippieEsq April 4, 2012 at 4:03 am

But….I neutered Earl Warrren.*

(*that phrase also serves as the working title of Scalia's next book)

prommie April 4, 2012 at 9:55 am

You are my hero and god.

HippieEsq April 4, 2012 at 1:01 pm

please tell that to Mrs. HippieEsq., she seems to be in denial.

Negropolis April 4, 2012 at 10:34 pm

If this is about taxes, mayhaps they need to bring this industry fully into light instead of this ridiculous legal limbo they leave it in.

HippieEsq April 5, 2012 at 9:33 am

You mean a policy change? At the federal level? Sigh….it appears we're both smoking (vaporizing?) too much.

Monsieur_Grumpe April 3, 2012 at 10:17 pm

A little OT.
I find that most of the jobs I apply for now a days require me to take a drug test. I've never had a problem passing but that has been purely by chance. If they would ask me if I take drugs I would be honest and I say that I like to smoke a doob once in a while with my friends and my preferred method of mind alteration is organic hallucinogens such as mushrooms but I would never show up at work stoned any more than I would show up at work drunk. I find it strange that they never ask if I take drugs. They just get me to piss into a sterile cup instead which is sealed by a nurse substitute and inserted into a machine that mindlessly performs the tests and emails the results to my potential employers HR department. The nurse substitute never knows the results.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 10:23 pm

It might be even more dangerous for you to admit you consort with us.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:26 pm

Grumpe, the best of luck to you in your job search and bug hugs!
My husband had a pee test at work and tested positive for PCP. They tested him again and he was clean. I don't trust the tests.

trampndirtdown April 4, 2012 at 12:15 am

Jeez Barb Jeffer's a freak.

Barb April 4, 2012 at 12:47 am

A super freak, the kind you don't take home to mother.

smokefilledroommate April 4, 2012 at 2:58 am

One of the most annoying things I was ever subjected to was a "hair sample" drug test by Blockbuster –I'd never heard of it; uh, I was young and needed a job in southwestern Ohio in 1993. The douchebag manager pulled my hair from underneath my ear (I had really short hair) and cut it off with rather dull scissors which fucking hurt. (I still wonder to this day if that was legitimate). I thought shit, I'm just an alcoholic, so I'll get the job.. A few weeks later after learning how to clean windows and all the nightly shit doled out to me that nobody wanted to do, I came back to work after a raucous Bengals/Eagles Toilet Bowl game in which a friend and I were pelted with peanut shells for rooting for the Eagles. Much beer was imbibed. I was greeted with "Amy, you smell like a brewery!". Needless to say, I didn't last long.

And that's my Blockbuster story.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 10:51 am

My Blockbuster story was; "I rented this DVD of Bambi to show to the kids … "

Hair sample drug testing for weed was all the rage back then, claiming it could distinguish if the testee had used it for up to 6 days prior. However, it seems the same test would give false positives for coal tar which was used in several hair prep products. Or so we would argue back then. Ever look at a reasonably cognizant judge and try to tell him the long haired hippie standing before him used Vitalis on his hair? Do they even still make Vitalis

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Insurance. If you drive a forklift or company car through the crowd of children, seniors, bunnies, baby deer, kittens riding puppies, and everyone's mothers, someone's gonna get sued. Especially if you were wasted. It's better just to make sure you can at least go to an interview sober-ish.

PuckStopsHere April 4, 2012 at 12:35 am

I passed a drug test once. I was pissed. Called my dealer straight away and told him, "I told you that weed you sold me was horseshit."

Crank_Tango April 4, 2012 at 2:26 am

Dave's not here, man.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 5:42 am

Being old and a veteran who came out of the service a bit less of the Adonis I was when I was drafted, I get to subject myself to VA ministrations for a variety of reasons. The last time I got the results of blood tests I found they added a test for marijuana. Making inquiries produced the usual; "I don't know." with the understated; "Are you trying to make trouble?"

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 10:31 pm

I'm a disgruntled Korean-American ex-student. Guess what my next move is.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 10:36 pm

If you're thinking about shooting a whole lot of people and then yourself, start with
yourself, please.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 10:50 pm

I have a cunning plan!

smokefilledroommate April 3, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Please let it include bibimbap made especially for me.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 11:00 pm

A road trip movie with an Indian friend?

snarkycomments April 4, 2012 at 10:34 am

Hanson was my favorite band, too.

C_R_Eature April 3, 2012 at 11:40 pm

As cunning as a fox who's just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University?

littlebigdaddy April 4, 2012 at 12:20 am

Cambridge libel!

DemmeFatale April 4, 2012 at 1:24 am

Sod off, Baldrick!

Warpde April 3, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Holder can take away my buds when he pries them from my THC laden hands.
Then again, I'll be so fucked up I probably won't notice………..
BC BUD 2012, FUCK YEAH!

Oh, sorry!
Wrong country.

FakaktaSouth April 3, 2012 at 10:54 pm

I remember hearing the man himself say this shit would not happen under his admin. It aggravates me. I have HEARD Pres O talk about this in a reasonable manner, so I know he knows this is bullshit. What about states' rights for real? (I don't care if I am a southerner and a big old cliche, the people in that state did vote for this to be allowed in their state, so that means, fuck off Feds, no?)
What a waste – of time, money and for God sake won't somebody think of the weed? Breaks my heart.

Designer_Rants April 3, 2012 at 11:01 pm

Not to mention it really does help people, so I've heard. People who can't eat because of chemo, people who have strange pains that no prescription seems to help…

prommie April 4, 2012 at 10:20 am

Not to mention people who enjoy a little enjoyment with their enjoyment. Being happy makes me happy.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 11:48 pm

President O, as in obasm? That's an image that gets me through the night.

HippieEsq April 5, 2012 at 9:38 am

Well, to be fair to the Kenyan Socialist administration, they promised not to interfere with growing/dispensary operations that were legal under state law and otherwise not implicating other federal criminal laws (RICO, tax, etc). So the point is….fuck I forgot.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:59 pm

Hold the phones! Sarah Palin has suggested Allen West for Veep.
OR someone who:
"….. has intimate knowledge of the way the military works and should work, perhaps by having a close family member serve, someone like that."

Sarah, are you suggesting that having your son in the Army qualifies you to be all Veepy again?
Is there anyone here in Wonkette who didn't/doesn't have a close family member who served in the military? Today, we are all VEEP nominees.

FakaktaSouth April 3, 2012 at 11:06 pm

HEY! We got a surgeon in our family, and I was JUST thinking it'd be fun to cut on somebody – I feel by Sarah's rationale I am instantly qualified – relatively speaking.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Fakata-I nominate your for the post of Surgeon General. Congratulations!

trampndirtdown April 4, 2012 at 12:24 am

Barb, my brother is a librarian. Can I get a small sinecure in the Library of Congress?

Toomush_Infer April 4, 2012 at 10:03 am

Barb, tramp: my sister-in-law is a libertarian: am I free?…

smokefilledroommate April 3, 2012 at 11:09 pm

My uncle served in the Air Force in the mid 80's. He messed his hand up and apparently got some kind of "experimental surgery" where they removed one of his knuckles or something which left his hand more fucked up than it was originally. According to him, he gets 'hush money' to this day.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:18 pm

SmokeFilled, thank you to your uncle for his service.

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 11:32 pm

My uncle, who passed away last week, volunteered for the Marines at the beginning of WW II, and came home with a metal plate in his head and epilepsy to go with it. He never talked much about the war, but a couple of summer sago I was talking to him and somehow his volunteering for the Marines came up, and he looked at me (or looked as best he could because he was going blind) and said, "What the heck was I thinking?!?"

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:41 pm

Flaming, my deepest condolences and respect for your uncle. I'm sorry for the loss your family suffered and appreciate the service your uncle gave to our country.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 10:47 am

When I got drafted (Summer '67) the Army lined you up in the induction center in a couple rows without telling you what it was for. I was raised to be courteous so I let a couple asshats push ahead of me. The a drill sergeant from the Marines came in and counted off the first twenty-five and marched them off to Camp Lejuene. I was about 29th. Best lesson I learned in the military for my whole time.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:27 am

My brother (a commenter of note) is a Navy hofficer. Does that mean I can be the first gay/village people straight Vice President?

ThundercatHo April 3, 2012 at 11:25 pm

This is so awesome. Please let it happen again. Please, please, please. Did you watch her this morning? I thought about, couldn't bring myself to do it and decided to wait for the highlights.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:32 pm

No, I didn't watch her. I'd rather be a plaything in an all chick prison.

Boojum April 4, 2012 at 1:28 am

Oh! Me too!

flamingpdog April 3, 2012 at 11:28 pm

Fucking' Allen West makes Alan Keyes look like Mr. Normal Sanity. Patrick Murphey is the Dem running against Mr. Flattop this year. I've thrown Murphey a few Ameros this time around even though I don't give a crap about Florida, just because Allen West is not only a discredit to his race, he's a discredit to any race, including the "human", which I'm not altogether sure he is actually a member of.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:35 pm

Tell me where to send the $$ Flaming.

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:45 am

Just clink on the "Patrick Murphy" linkie above. There'll be a contribute button.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 6:05 am

http://act.credoaction.com/take_down/the-ten.html

By that cell phone carrier that promotes itself as not contributing to right, republican causes and politicians.
They have a list of six, soon to be ten, congress members they are targeting.
Allen West is one. Joe "Deadbeat Dad" Walsh is another. Of these two, a Superpac raising $1,000,000 may have legs. Allen West is in a district with new boundaries which some say will work against him and Joe Walsh is in a district with new boundaries and the Democrats just chose Tammy Duckworth to run against him.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 11:36 pm

Oh yes, the Romney cabinet:
Rubio: VP
John Bolton: Sec. of State
Palin: Dept of Energy
Ryan: OMB
Allen West: Defense
Inhofe: Interior
Malkin: Pres Sec't
Newt: Education
Steve King…here King, here King: Fatherland Security
Cantor: Treasury
Grassley: Agriculture
Bachmann: Attorney General

Barb April 3, 2012 at 11:42 pm

Radio, you just made me throw up a little in my mouth.

Radio福井県 April 3, 2012 at 11:49 pm

That is so funny Barb, because my initial salutation to my reply was: Thanks Barb for making me puke on my keyboard.
Is your passport dusted off? Because if this happens, the Radio station is off to British Columbia.

Barb April 4, 2012 at 12:17 am

Radio, Jeffer has a job opportunity in Canada and we have room in the U-Haul. It's going to be horrible with my disturbingly insatiable desire to have a spotless house and homemade food. You stay alive, no matter what occurs! I will find you.

PuckStopsHere April 4, 2012 at 12:24 am

I once stayed at a Holiday Inn Express.

DerrickWildcat April 4, 2012 at 1:20 am

I was in the Army, but I don't think I'm smart enough to be the President.

DemmeFatale April 4, 2012 at 1:35 am

I grew up on military bases overseas, so I guess that makes me a foreign policy expert.

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 3:07 am

These people.

Shit, I was in the Air Force for a few years. On the one hand, I wasn't in long enough to become a junior colonel like Allen West, but on the other hand I wasn't forced out for being even a bigger piece of shit than the military could stand.

BUT, I readily cede my place in the Wonketeer line-up of VPOTUS candidates to ttommy, who — living in Georgia as he does — would be a perfect electoral complement for either Rmoney or Mr. Faecescious. Close contact skills, also.

#thisisajoke,tommy

ThundercatHo April 3, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Hopey, you can stop sending me emails about your fucking bumper stickers now. I'll vote for you but you can count me out for all the other work (and donations) that I did for your campaign in '08 cuz I've just had it with your Republican bullshit.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Yeah the fake ones from Michelle are especially hurtful. If she was like, hey, if it weren't for BO, I'd totally do you, ok fine, but it's like enter to win dinner with me and my husband.

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:54 am

Yeah, I've actually replied to a couple of the letters from Michelle with a pledge of zero Ameros, but the message that I think her hubby seems like a nice person and all, and I'm a gonna vote for him again, but I only give dollars to Dems, not moderate Republicans. She keeps sending me more letters, though, hoping I'll change my mind, I guess.

Biff April 3, 2012 at 11:50 pm

I'm thinking Oaksterdam might be one of those California colleges that santorum says doesn't even teach US history.

littlebigdaddy April 3, 2012 at 11:51 pm

Honestly, if it weren't for weed this country would be Euro-socialist by now. Weed makes you dumb and saps your energy and in many cases turns you into a conservative cunt, because you have become so fucking self-centered. Alcohol makes you a progressive because it is a constant reminder of human frailty.

prommie April 4, 2012 at 10:22 am

Thats what The Man wants you to think, man.

fuflans April 3, 2012 at 11:56 pm

baby microwaving?

shit. that's –

LOOK OVER THERE!!! someone said SKULLFUCKING and r*tard!!

Doktor StrangeZoom April 3, 2012 at 11:59 pm

I thought Bunny Colvin said Hamsterdam was OK…

imissopus April 4, 2012 at 12:02 am

Has anyone here ever seen Erik Jay and Ken Layne in the same room at the same time?

Barb April 4, 2012 at 12:24 am

In a police lineup, yes.

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:57 am

Aw, give Mr. Jay a break. At least I didn't feel like slitting an artery after reading his post. I did crawl back down into my burrow and cry, though.

LiberalMantra April 4, 2012 at 12:09 am

Tommy Chong's teaching now? No wonder American History is getting the short end of the bon– err, stick.

imissopus April 4, 2012 at 1:11 am

OT, you nerds: http://twitpic.com/95b6ki

DerrickWildcat April 4, 2012 at 1:18 am

I have both of her albums. One is pleasant enough, but the other one is really dopey.

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 8:59 am

She is still looking pretty good. Saw her at the Qui Non AFB in early 69, maybe with the New Christie Minstrels. Maybe they were at separate times. I didn't even know Star Trek existed. One has rare opportunities to view TV in those circumstances.

mrblifil April 4, 2012 at 9:35 am

Ah, a charming Negress…

ThundercatHo April 4, 2012 at 9:43 am

Thank you, I can't wait to show my husband this pic. I'd love to have this in a large print to frame.

oldedinvn April 4, 2012 at 8:05 am

Lucky me, living in a commonist country where they don't not have any freedoms except them that ain't not stupid. Here, a bit of weed is not illegal. Religion trying to interfere with gubiment is go to jail time . Best ever separation of church & state ever.

ttommyunger April 4, 2012 at 8:12 am

I'm guessing Michele Leonhart either needs a really good horse-fucking or wears really comfortable shoes, which is it? Holder? He's just doing what he's told, like he's been doing his whole life. Pot? Meh. Methinks this "University" may have it's hands in several "pots".

smashedinhat April 4, 2012 at 8:27 am

Everyone picks on stoners, because it's easy. It should be a crime to harsh ones mellow.

Still waiting on that first post of the day! Tapping my foot!

ifthethunderdontgetya April 4, 2012 at 8:50 am

In other Hopey-Holder news,

Five Right-wing Supreme Court Justices side with Administration on strip searches:

Numerous progressive commentators are lambasting the Supreme Court for its 5-4 ruling yesterday in Florence v. Bd. of Chosen Freeholders, and rightfully so. The 5-judge conservative faction held that prison officials may strip-search anyone arrested even for the most minor offenses before admitting them to the general population of a jail or prison, even in the absence of a shred of suspicion that they are carrying weapons or contraband.

What virtually none of this anti-Florence commentary mentioned, though, was that the Obama DOJ formally urged the Court to reach the conclusion it reached.

~

DahBoner April 4, 2012 at 9:15 am

Strip searches are part of Obamacare.

You're supposed to ask the nice Policeman to check those suspicious polyps…

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 10:40 am

Scalia asked for a private demonstration in chambers.

DahBoner April 4, 2012 at 9:13 am

Hey!!!!

You got your Amsterdam in my Oakland….

mrblifil April 4, 2012 at 9:34 am

Dave's not here man…

James Michael Curley April 4, 2012 at 9:37 am

Herb Kohl (D-Milwaukee Bucs) had a hold on Michele Leonhart's nomination for a year before he withdrew it in Dec. 2010. I guess he decided to squeeze one out for Michele (another singleL) because WI dems took such a beating in 2010. He is retiring at the end of his term this year so he is not running for re-election.
However, he had in Judiciary Committee (its there for obfuscation by the Repubs) The Nursing Home Resident Pain Relief Act of 2011 (S 1560) which would allow Seniors in Fed funded nursing homes (about all of them) to get "Schedule II" drugs. Which will circumvent the DEA's action which is blocking such prescriptions in many states where 'Medical marijuana" has been prescribed. You can call his office at 202-224-5653

prommie April 4, 2012 at 9:53 am

Gotta admire Holder's independance, boldness, and consistency.

thefrontpage April 4, 2012 at 10:06 am

In other pot-related news, Marion Barry won his Democratic primary election race on April 3.

chascates April 4, 2012 at 10:13 am

For not having a live-blog last night some people seem to be sleeping in today. Or did Newell get in yet another bar fight?

prommie April 4, 2012 at 10:35 am

If he was going to raid a dope school, why not go after Liberty U.? Thats a place doing far far more damage to our society than weed ever did.

Biff April 4, 2012 at 11:24 am

The mere existence of this post suggests we are all morally weak.

WonkCynic April 4, 2012 at 4:24 pm

It's always funny observing a liberal who has become disillusioned because one of the puppets in their party continues doing what puppets do. Any democrat who thinks the puppets who win the elections are going to reverse any of the policies and legislation that generate income for the legal industry by locking up idiots for dope needs to wake up. Just because your favorite politician hero stands in front of you and says things (lies) that are intended to earn your vote on election day, it does not mean they are actually going to follow through with any of their promises. Especially if they led you to believe that they'd be relaxing the drug laws. It has been amusing watching all of these medical marijuana advocates come out of the woodwork to reveal themselves over the past few years. Now that you've revealed yourselves, you will be watched closely until the next round of raids and lockups begins. Enjoy paying your legal fees. Your party will never let you grow a plant in your back yard that makes you feel good and competes with the pharma companies that sponsor their political rallies and campaigns. You've been had, yet again.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Can we haz a third room with food?

starfanglednut April 3, 2012 at 10:00 pm

Ice cream please.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Yes, lots of cheese,lobster, really good bread and caramel ice-cream .

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:03 pm

I am now enjoying a very delicious American Airlines ice-cream sundae.

FlownOver April 4, 2012 at 10:06 am

All you want is everything.

OK, except the booze.

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:24 pm

Are you on your way to N.Y., Sis?

HippieEsq April 3, 2012 at 10:33 pm

For some of us, regularly eyeballing a gram in a vaporizer (I prefer the one officially endorsed by Willie Nelson) is the emotional raincoat that allows interaction with despicable people without snapping their heads off (or sk$&%fuc++ng them, in Wonkateer parlance). Also I'm sooooo high.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 10:33 pm

We land in about an hour and a half at JFK. My single life in NYC…MrLlmeylizzie will be in Los Angeles until June…

Barb April 3, 2012 at 10:36 pm

I am here for you and everything will be fine.

Jukesgrrl April 3, 2012 at 11:33 pm

Hmm. Another thing we have in common.

Lizzie, did you see that our boyfriend Martin O'Malley got a kick in the head today? A state senator that the Guv, Steny Hoyer, and many others had endorsed for a newly drawn Congressional seat in western Maryland was defeated by … get this: A BANKER who doesn't even live in the district. The banker was endorsed by Bill Clinton (who received donations by said banker when he was president) and the Washington Post and used his own money to outspend O'Malley's candidate 3-to-1.

Limeylizzie April 3, 2012 at 11:39 pm

Then you and I must comfort him.

trampndirtdown April 4, 2012 at 12:07 am

Oh ring that puberty bell!

C_R_Eature April 4, 2012 at 6:12 am

The newly-erected refuse of your teeming schools.
Send these, the hairless, penis-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the engorged tools!"

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:31 am

I did four years hard time in Williamsburg in the early 70s. It's a big part of the reason I fled west.

Radio福井県 April 4, 2012 at 12:33 am

De nada. Mrs. Radio and I are anti-clutter minimalists también. And, I tell this story often: I married a cute girl and got a gourmet chef out of the deal.

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:41 am

Thanks, Barb. I was actually relieved when he died. Like my mom (his sister) he died very slowly over a long period of time. In each case, it got so that I had a hard time remembering them from when they were younger and still vital. When it's my time, I hope I get run over by a tractor-trailer truck.

Crank_Tango April 4, 2012 at 2:29 am

My grandfather was a naval corpsman who served out WWII in China inspecting the whores in the brothels for VD.

You're welcome.

Fight the clap over there, so we don't have to fight it over here, also.

imissopus April 4, 2012 at 12:59 am

William and Mary grad?

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:40 pm

William and Mary grad, yes.

Barb April 4, 2012 at 1:05 am

I love your love story!

George Spelvin April 4, 2012 at 3:14 am

Good point. I have rarely indulged for a couple of decades, but I always preferred cookies.

FROTHY April 4, 2012 at 4:14 am

Vaporizer. I use it inside the house, and both my partners don't like the smell of smoke, and they can't even tell I'm using it. There's a slight aroma of popcorn. The strain I use for the pain doesn't give the munchies, and, if anything, it makes me MORE energetic (no pain) and a bit obsessive, hence the lengthy quarterly reading lists and to-do lists, and that kind of shit. Which I like, because lying around zoned out is SO not enjoyable, as an Oldz.

C_R_Eature April 4, 2012 at 6:14 am

Sodoff Baldrick! I knew him, Horatio…

Biff April 4, 2012 at 10:46 am

My hero! My own grandfather was a carpenter prior to WWI. The Corps of Engineers already had all the carpenters they needed, so he was trained as a "dentist". What could go wrong, he already had a proven aptitude, and plier experience…

LesBontemps April 4, 2012 at 10:46 am

Or colonial reenactor?

flamingpdog April 4, 2012 at 12:44 pm

No, no, no. In my four years there, I never even ventured more than one block into Colonial Williamsburg, and that was only because my PO box was there (no mail delivery to students on campus) and for a little shopping. Too many gooks (= tourists) and too much sanitized history for snobbish college students!

trampndirtdown April 5, 2012 at 12:39 am

Go Tribe. were you Eric Cantor's roommate?

flamingpdog April 5, 2012 at 2:20 am

Nah, he was still dipping girls pigtails in inkwells when I was there, and he was in the Law School there. More likely he was roommates with one-L. Now I REALLY haz the sads.

I did live down the hall from this Republican douchebag freshman year. I only knew him to say hi in the hallway, but he seemed like a decent enough sort at the time.

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