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It is official. Warren Buffett, the Sage of Omaha, class warrior, and by all appearances victim of Stage Four of Lesbian Bed Death, will now use his “fuck-you” money to buy a slot and make you listen to him singing whenever and wherever he wants. He has appeared with a ukelele for the Chinese New Year, and in his latest bid for the lights of Broadway, in a newsboy’s cap from the 1930s, when he was 47 years old. See him crackle and warble — charmingly! unbearably! depending upon your affection or lack thereof for the crusty tycoon — a “funny” song about how he now owns a newspaper, the medium of the future (just ask Rupert Murdoch)!

After he finished his delightful (horrible) number, world’s famousest secretary Debbie Bosanek offered a list of things she would buy once she hit the “Mitt Romney” job creator tax bracket of like negative 220 percent. Why does old lesbian Warren Buffett hate America? [Omaha.com, via Romenesko]

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