ONE BOURBON ONE SCOTCH ALL THE BEERS  4:30 pm April 2, 2012

Is Rick Santorum A Gutter Drunk?

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Smegma lips that touch liquor shall never touch mineIt is an excellent question, the one we have just posed right there in the headline. Is Rick Santorum a gutter drunk? Buzzfeed investigates, and seems to have photographic proof that yes, Rick Santorum is a gutter drunk. Here is a Twitter showing him drinking beer at 11:30 a.m. because if he doesn’t, he will have the DTs, because of how he is a terrible alcoholic who is addicted to alcohol (PROBABLY) and maybe other drugs too, why not. We hope for the sake of his 54 children that he is somehow able to kick his habit of constantly drinking premium beers all day and night forever, maybe by following in the footsteps of only-cool-Republican-ever and certified nice lady Betty Ford. The First Step, Rick, is to admit you are powerless over delicious beer and then find a higher power to believe in. A nicer one than you currently believe in, probably, because That Dude sucks. [Via Buzzfeed]

 

Hola wonkerados.

To improve site performance, we did a thing. It could be up to three minutes before your comment appears. DON'T KEEP RETRYING, OKAY?

Also, if you are a new commenter, your comment may never appear. This is probably because we hate you.

{ 172 comments }

Come here a minute April 2, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Morning beer — finally something Rick and I agree on!

Barb April 2, 2012 at 4:32 pm

Rick is so uptight and conservative that he won't even eat a Hershey bar if it has nuts.

elviouslyqueer April 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm

I'd wager Rick's had a few up the Hershey Highway as well.

nounverb911 April 2, 2012 at 4:33 pm

Drunk Dialing: No
Drunk Driving: No
Drunk Campaigning?

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:36 pm

It couldn't hurt Santorum

mrpuma2u April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

The way his campaign is going, I would not be surprised he starts the day with an Irish coffee and those "campaign helper pills" the doctors gave him. The noonish beer is just to pace himself.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Yea, you gotta take the edge off that downer from the morning helper but before the three martini lunch.

An Asexual Ungulate April 2, 2012 at 4:58 pm

"Rick, America called and they want to talk about last night… they know you probably don't remember any of it, but you said some super awkward things and they'd like to discuss them with you. They think maybe you have a problem. There's no easy way to say this Rick, but this is an intervention."

BornInATrailer April 2, 2012 at 4:34 pm

To be fair, I think if most people only had sex when they were trying to create a kid, they'd be hammered much of the time too.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:17 pm

To be fair, if you were hammered much of the time, you'd have a hard time remembering if the sex was for enjoyment or baby-making or both, which is obviously a sin against Santorum's personal lord and savior.

johnnymeatworth April 2, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Although, to be fair, he needs to drain that bottle before using it as a buttplug….

FakaktaSouth April 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Between Obasms, Limp Mitts, Pill Poppin Perrys and now Santorum dranking on the down low – this is definitely my kind of news day. I want more! More! More!

Mumble_JustSayYesOta April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

I want more! More!…

'Atta girl. Gittin' drunk on fun!

CapnFatback April 2, 2012 at 5:21 pm

I'll see your Obasm and raise you a moregasm.

FROTHY April 2, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Gurl, U R INSATIABLE!

Schmannnity April 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm

11:30 is Bloody Mary time, you fool.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:37 pm

And two hours past wine thirty

FakaktaSouth April 2, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Abso-fucking-lut-ly. Or popov-ly or Grey goosely, schmirnoffy? ThreeOlivesly.
Damn. I'm out of vodka.

elviouslyqueer April 2, 2012 at 4:48 pm
FakaktaSouth April 2, 2012 at 4:53 pm

I DO need a big ol bottle of … this stuff… – just like candy!

Geminisunmars April 2, 2012 at 5:09 pm

I'll have, eearp, whas sheees havink. I wanno be poopular.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:19 pm

If I "popped out at parties" I'd surely be arrested.

actor212 April 4, 2012 at 10:03 am

Socko the Clown? Is that you????

mayor_quimby April 5, 2012 at 5:21 am

You are in Luk-su-so-wa, my Belvedere friend.

Chet Kincaid April 2, 2012 at 4:59 pm

But only between Memorial Day and Labor Day!!

Schmannnity April 2, 2012 at 6:30 pm

You're forgetting Easter–Christ has risen indeed [drains Bloody Mary] Hallelujah!

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 9:09 pm

"Bloody mary, blessed are you among cocktails. Pray for me now in the hour of my death, which I hope is soon. Amen." – Sterling Archer

Lascauxcaveman April 2, 2012 at 5:46 pm

I like my first beer before I get out of bed in the morning. So, yeah around 11:30 sounds good.

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 8:54 pm

You can wait until 11:30? Talk about your superhuman will power.

MosesInvests April 2, 2012 at 9:06 pm

Or Mimosas.

FROTHY April 2, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Yeah, every fucking faggy brunch place serves mimosas these days. You can always sip 'em and pretend you're NOT slowly sliding to the floor.

elfgoldsackring April 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm

I have to commend him. If I were Rick Santorum, I doubt I could get through a single day without at least one meth-fueled gay hooker interlude.

FROTHY April 2, 2012 at 10:20 pm

Well, we don't KNOW that he's not getting a little on the down low.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Is Rick Santorum A Gutter Drunk?

Yes.

This has been another edition of SASQ…

littlebigdaddy April 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm

In fairness, everyone I have ever known from PA (and there are a lot of them) has enjoyed their morning beer. They didn't set It's always Sunny in Philadephia there for no reason.

cheetojeebus April 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm

My Favorite bar name of all time, from Kensington, Philly, "Booger's Beef and Beer"

Baconzgood April 2, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Drinking beer at 11:30 a.m is sooooo light weight. Baconz already moved off the 7&7s and is on straight vodka by 10:15.

Chet Kincaid April 2, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Is Baconz a shell-shocked, dissolute surgeon in a Korean War mobile army surgical hospital?

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Or perhaps a grizzled private detective in San Francisco in the 30s?

DaRooster April 2, 2012 at 5:28 pm

… or a sales guy in Northern California?

actor212 April 4, 2012 at 9:59 am

Attention MUST be paid!

Warwhatgoodfor April 2, 2012 at 5:35 pm

Naw, he was a straight bourbon man. Although he did manage to pack away a considerable amount of good scotch in The Big Sleep.

SecretMuslin April 2, 2012 at 4:36 pm

He's normally a PBR guy, to be sure.

James Michael Curley April 2, 2012 at 5:00 pm

Iron City
Definitively, Iron City

anniegetyerfun April 2, 2012 at 5:18 pm

Are you saying that those sweater vests are ironic?

SayItWithWookies April 2, 2012 at 5:21 pm

Prayer, Buttsechs and Remorse?

Boojum April 2, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Priests, Blowjobs, and Regret.

GunToting[Redacted] April 2, 2012 at 5:42 pm

As long as it isn't Lord Chesterfield. My roommate in grad school brought a case of that back from a ski trip, and we had nearly a whole case left still 3 months later. And this is GRAD school, when we had less than no beer money. Shit was NASTY. Then again, probably exactly what Rick would drink. God forbid he enjoy the taste of the intoxicant.

Chick-Fil-Atheistâ„¢ April 2, 2012 at 4:37 pm

"Rooster could beat everyone at beer-chugging, [Christine] Grasso said. She explained the Rooster technique: 'You just open your throat.'"

ewewewewewew!!! His little sister swallowed drunken Santorum.

hagajim April 2, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Might be the most human thing I've seen Rick do so far.

Baconzgood April 2, 2012 at 4:38 pm

CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG

flamingpdog April 2, 2012 at 11:47 pm

I drink I can! I drink I can!

Lucidamente1 April 2, 2012 at 4:39 pm

To be fair, he's just emptying the bottle to make room for the fetus.

SorosBot April 2, 2012 at 4:39 pm

He doesn't allow himself to enjoy sex – or have sex with the gender he really wants to – so of course Rick turns to the bottle instead, just like all the non-pedophile Catholic priests out there.

noodlesalad April 2, 2012 at 4:39 pm

He can't even use the excuse that it's 5 o'clock somewhere, because the earth is flat and the daylight savings is a gummint conspiracy also.

coolhandnuke April 2, 2012 at 4:39 pm

Much like Cheney's new heart will reject its' new evil owner, I sense this beer will reject this empty, pious vessel.

LettucePrey April 2, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Does anyone really think he could spew all that bullshit sober?

Chick-Fil-Atheistâ„¢ April 2, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Also, it looks like Santorum's nickname in college was "Rooster."

So, anyone ever watched chicken sex? It is incredibly fast. Blink and you'll miss it.

I'm not speculating anything. I'm just leaving these details for you to consume. I report, you infer.

Doktor StrangeZoom April 2, 2012 at 7:00 pm

Keep on … oh, nemmind.

Loaded_Pants April 2, 2012 at 8:28 pm

Fair and balanced.

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 8:41 pm

It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

Lucidamente1 April 2, 2012 at 4:41 pm

But it's 6:30 P.M. Vatican time.

Baconzgood April 2, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Can we really snark on this people? Glass houses and all…

prommie April 2, 2012 at 4:54 pm

Fuck yes we can! We're not out there telling everyone they can't get married and shouldn't fuck and they have to worship Jesus to matter and all his shit.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:55 pm

You running for President?

QUIT JUDGING ME!

Loaded_Pants April 2, 2012 at 8:29 pm

Glass bottles and all…

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 4:42 pm

I bet Rick is one who shows up to a kegger with his red plastic cup and no money. Asshole.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:54 pm

And a six pack of Bud Yuengling, cuz it's BYOB

(Edited to reflect state of origin)

James Michael Curley April 2, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Day was when you could walk up to The Hill and get a six pack of Iron City right out of the plant for $1.00.

Warwhatgoodfor April 2, 2012 at 5:33 pm

OMG. Overpriced at that. Quart of Rheingold at 35c was my personal favorite.

actor212 April 4, 2012 at 10:00 am

There was a bar in the West Village called "The Red Witch" best known for the fact that wasn't sawdust on the floor, who offered two pints of Carling for a quarter in the mid-70s

GunToting[Redacted] April 2, 2012 at 5:44 pm

Ug. See my above diatribe about Lord Chesterfield (Yuengling's "finest").

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 2, 2012 at 5:05 pm

Always gonna get the next round and then hiding in the bathroom when the waitress finally comes by.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:22 pm

Or "getting a fresh bowl of peanuts" at the bar.

Geminisunmars April 2, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Oh. Is one supposed to contribute to a kegger? No wonder I haven't been invited to one lately.

SayItWithWookies April 2, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Hmmm — known fabricator, abandons his children, has delusions of grandeur, persecution complex — he's either got a serious alcohol/drug problem or he and his followers are about to move to a farm in Guyana.

Chick-Fil-Atheistâ„¢ April 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm

Please. I'll charter.

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Thanks for reminding me to never drink Santorum flavored Kool-Aid.

SorosBot April 2, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Great, there goes my lunch at that thought.

Maman April 2, 2012 at 4:42 pm

If Rick were really following in the steps of Jesus Christ, he would be drinking wine. Cuz that is what JC turned the water and his blood into..

Extemporanus April 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm

"The photo has been drinking, not me…not me…not me…not me…not…me."

- Rick Santorum

Blueb4sunrise April 2, 2012 at 5:10 pm

Waits LIBEL!!!!!!!!!

SheriffRoscoe April 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm

If he promises to never take his shirt off in public – ever again – I will not judge his alcohol problem.

widestanceromance April 2, 2012 at 4:48 pm

If you promise to never bring that up–ever again–I will not judge you.

elfgoldsackring April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

I didn't realize Santorum was an Irish name.

Blueb4sunrise April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

It would be irresponsible……y cetera….

Callyson April 2, 2012 at 4:44 pm

So I was right when I said that this GOP presidential campaign would drive anyone to drink.

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Hey, it turned Rick Perry into a pill-popping moron. Well, a pill-popper anyways. Well, never mind.

elviouslyqueer April 2, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Oh Rick, the first step is admitting you have a problem.

No, not with being an alcoholic, you dumbass. I'm talking about being a lying, deceitful, bigoted, closeted, self-loathing, religiously intolerant nancyboy.

widestanceromance April 2, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Slanderous! We have no evidence he's a nancyboy (and speaking for myself, I do not want any, of any kind, ever).

FlownOver April 2, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Stupid, drunk and stupid is no way… [need I type the rest?]

Geminisunmars April 2, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Stupid, drunk, and sweater-vested?

metamarcisf April 2, 2012 at 4:46 pm

The only thing that can save Fecal Boy's campaign is to be photographed breastfeeding at the Wailing Wall.

Clancy_Pants April 2, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Who does he think he is? Don Fucking Draper?

edgydrifter April 2, 2012 at 4:47 pm

I don't have a hot tub to drink in, but the shower has good water pressure and gets plenty warm. DRINKING BEER IN THE SHOWER IS AWESOME, is what I'm saying. Santorum should try it. Maybe it would mellow him out a little.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:58 pm

And the advantage? You cut out the middleman.

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 5:07 pm

True Fact!

The best cure for jet lag is to check into your hotel and then immediately take a hot shower while drinking a beer. 3 pm or 3 am, it does not matter. It works.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:08 pm

In fact, it works best if you cut out the travel and just shower drinking beer at home.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:30 pm

Alas, do not drink and do cocaine in the bathtub, though…

Jerri April 2, 2012 at 4:47 pm

Guys. He's still in Wisconsin. If Rick wants to win our pickled hearts, he's going to have to booze it up before lunch.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:58 pm

Click through the link. He was doing it in Illinois and Louisiana, too.

Jerri April 2, 2012 at 5:14 pm

That bastard!!

Then fuck it, I'm voting for Newt.

Rotundo_ April 2, 2012 at 5:35 pm

Yeah, I have been leaning Santorum since it would cause the most chaos amongst the repukes, but now I am leaning towards Newt! since it is looking like Mittens is going to win this thing. It would be nice if we could stretch this agonizing process out for as long as possible for Mittens and the repubba-bubbas but all good things have to end at some point. Newt! will make as good a protest (read rat-fucking) vote as any of them.

Jerri April 2, 2012 at 9:40 pm

Yep, and Newt could use the ego boost (for our amusement.)

elviouslyqueer April 2, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Well, duh, Louisiana, home of the Drive-Thru Daiquiri Huts. When in Rome, son.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:32 pm

They don't call it Bourbon Street for nothin', mon ami.

ManchuCandidate April 2, 2012 at 4:48 pm

Bud light presents real american losers
(Real american losers)
Today we salute you Mr. Papist Feetus Fetishist Theocracy Advocate
(Mr. Papist Feetus Fetishist Theocracy Advocate )
Your tireless efforts keep big gubbiment out of finances and slam it right into women's vajayjays like the He man Womyn H8tr you are (Hate'em Vaginas)
Instinctively, you play to your audience of Morans
(Get a Brain Morans!!!)
Carefully ending up shooting off mouth and your proverbial nutsack
(Ow MY BALLSSS!!)
Shitting on half the electorate desribed by the Bard as "Hell Hath No Fury like a Woman Scorned"
(Bitches gonna cut yah bad!)
Can he hold on to be the lead weight (VP) that sinks the Rombot?
(Woah, yea)
You know. why? because you're mr. Papist Feetus Fetishist Theocracy Advocate
(US America politics couldn't be as fucked up without you)
So crack open an ice cold bud light mister, and know it's no accident that women and the tinted people hate your fucking guts.
(Hey at least people will remember you as a mess of shit, lube and sperm.)

Lucidamente1 April 2, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Santorum Lite: Great taste, less filling.

elviouslyqueer April 2, 2012 at 5:16 pm

F. T. W.

BarackMyWorld April 2, 2012 at 4:50 pm

He's ideas are about as coherent as any other drunk's that I know.

elfgoldsackring April 2, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Whoa, dude, leave some apostrophes for the rest of us, will ya?

BarackMyWorld April 2, 2012 at 5:17 pm

I'm too type to drunk.
*burp*

SteveMcCroskey April 2, 2012 at 4:51 pm

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the Santorum.

Blueb4sunrise April 2, 2012 at 4:51 pm
SkinnyNerd April 2, 2012 at 4:52 pm

I wonder what a conversation at the Daily Dairy Wisconsin Wonk was like today.

Reporter 1: My candidate's wife talked about his flaccid penis.
Reporter 2: My candidate went on and on about California, schools, and history. Then he started drinking. He also looked at a poster of cheese.
Reporter 3: My candidate's supporters accused other politicians of racism.
Reporter 1: Where's the guy covering Newt?
Reporter 2: Out sick, wouldn't you be?

prommie April 2, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Sounds plausible, a young version of Boehnor.

mrblifil April 2, 2012 at 4:53 pm

Seems like a beer he'd like to have a guy with.

Tundra Grifter April 2, 2012 at 4:53 pm

“Gutter drunk” is a new term to me (although I grasp the concept).

“Get Her drunk” I’ve heard before.

Guppy April 2, 2012 at 4:54 pm

admit you are powerless over delicious beer and then find a higher power to believe in.

A hip flask of gin.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 4:57 pm

I, for one, welcome our glass-lined silver overlords.

DaRooster April 2, 2012 at 5:19 pm

"I think a flask is a great gift. It says,"You seem like an alcoholic on the go."

(or something like that)
Jim Gaffigan

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:24 pm

True dat! I mean, you carry around a gallon jug in your car in case you run out of gas, right? So why not a hip flask?

(NOTE TO THE KIDS: Don't drink and drive. You might spill some.)

prommie April 2, 2012 at 4:56 pm

Ya'll realize this is the Rove wing's final "take off the gloves" assault on him, so their man Mitt can stop getting pulled to the right.

Rotundo_ April 2, 2012 at 5:43 pm

True, but Mittens has enough comedy gold already on tape and readily available for rebroadcast to render a run to center pretty tough: All the Obama crew has to do is select the best clips of the PanderMatic in action to shoot down any moderation they might try to pass off on people now. Even the American people aren't that stupid. If they were, we would have repealed the presidential term limits and had Dubya for a few more cycles, if not forever.

el_donaldo April 2, 2012 at 4:57 pm

A higher power? If he needs it, yeah, there's not really much power in a fictional bronze-age skygod. A few D cells would have more power.

I introduce to you the Church of the Vibrator. Bow down to that, Frothy.

ElPinche April 2, 2012 at 5:00 pm

If he smokes a joint for lunch, then he's just like me !!

weej_FukuiKatie April 2, 2012 at 5:01 pm

More than breakfast beers and donuts, likely it is Frothy's Opus Dei bent that has given his campaign a terminal yeast infection.

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Is that a shelf made of cheese foam?

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:09 pm

It's a form of polyisocyanurate!

DaRooster April 2, 2012 at 5:03 pm

11:30 am?

What the hell are you waiting for… oh, and Whiskey or GTFO!!

Between this news and Parry's pain meds… I guess I should be a right wing, execution havin', sweater vest wearin', quotin' the Bible (when it suits me) but not acting it out, moran douche bag.

DerrickWildcat April 2, 2012 at 5:05 pm

I like Beer. I like Cheese. I like Soup.
But I don't like Beer Cheese Soup.

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 2, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Huh. I would think a morning drinker would be either way more fun or way more violent than him.

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 5:12 pm

Nah, Stickie Dickie is one of those depressing drunks who starts yapping about all the touchdowns he made during his high school glory days and then starts crying when he realizes he's actually middle-aged and will never catch a touchdown pass again.

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 2, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Yeah, and then goes home and punches his wife. Wait, maybe that's why his daughter looks so sad.

Gopherit April 2, 2012 at 5:09 pm

It's nice to know he enjoys some simple pleasures besides fetus worshiping and kid-fucking.

MissTaken April 2, 2012 at 5:14 pm

He's truly a renaissance man.

Chet Kincaid April 2, 2012 at 5:10 pm

"I…I was jush rea-ding in za bottom of a Tom Collins glass lash night that Obama has ordered teachers never ta use the word "Merica" in the clashroom — hick! Who is zhis guy?!"

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 2, 2012 at 5:12 pm

I'm pretty sure that bottle is actually full of holy water.

BigSkullF*ckingDog April 2, 2012 at 5:15 pm

I'm pretty sure there's actually a fetus in that bottle.

anniegetyerfun April 2, 2012 at 5:20 pm

So, you're saying that there is one thing about him that isn't 100% loathesome?

Mahousu April 2, 2012 at 5:23 pm

Today, we are all gutter drunks.

And pretty much every other day also, but that doesn't sound as impressive.

randcoolcatdaddy April 2, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Well, I see Rick Santorum is still a douchebag frat-boy.

That's some choice the Republicans give us this year – an emotional train-wreck that drinks at 11:00 am, a robot that doesn't drink but wears magic underwear, and an egotistical fart that would drive the whole country to drink at 11:00 am.

coolhandnuke April 2, 2012 at 5:27 pm

First beer in history to have more froth and head in it after it's empty.

Warwhatgoodfor April 2, 2012 at 5:28 pm

Nice John Lee Hooker lead in, editrix. I do personally prefer "Boom, Boom, Boom, Boom, gonna get you right down", if you know what I mean.. One of the last great ones. Thank the FSM for B B King.

Jus_Wonderin April 2, 2012 at 5:32 pm

Are we going to have to ask him to blow into this tube? (Oh, wait. He probably has done that).

undeadgoat April 2, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Hmm, does anyone say what he's drinking? It looks like it might be something from New Glarus, in which case this may literally be the first acceptable action of Rick Santorum's life to this beer-loving Wisconsinite.

donner_froh April 2, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Quite a headline in the Opus Dei article linked above:

Rick Santorum has embraced Spanish priest's behind

Pithaughn April 2, 2012 at 6:11 pm

Did anyone get a picture of Rick on Bourbon St? Hopefully on his 3d hurricane.

Antispandex April 2, 2012 at 6:20 pm

I KNEW it! If you look hard enough, there is something to like about everyone! Beer before 12…very cosmopolitan. Damn, he's what people back in the old neighborhood used to call a pinche alcoholico! Way to go Rick!

gout April 2, 2012 at 6:35 pm

Judging from some of the shit that comes out of that guy's mouth, I am guessing he is still drinking at 11:30 rather than just getting started.

Dashboard Buddha April 2, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Rick, a union member, and a tea bagger sit down to a six pack of beer. Rick takes five and tells the bagger to be careful because the union member wanted his beer.

Dashboard Buddha April 2, 2012 at 6:41 pm

Rick does not look so good in the morning:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRVhevmDwlk

Barrelhse April 2, 2012 at 7:21 pm

Drinking beer at 11:30 AM? WTF?
Did he sleep in or something?

StarsUponThars April 2, 2012 at 7:39 pm
Robman2 April 2, 2012 at 7:47 pm

OK, is this in WI? If so, drinking bottled beer is NOT blue collar, that is gentry suds. real working stiffs drink at the bar rail, from tall glasses, of missile fuel gauge (see: 6% or better) beverages. It's Wis-'f'ing–consin for cryin out loud, he can and must do better than that for my non vote.

Plus, he is standing behind the DIT, what a twit.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:37 pm

So, I take it that you're one-a-'nem professional drunks, then?

Isyaignert April 2, 2012 at 8:08 pm

My camping breakfast is a banana, a Hershey bar and a beer.

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 8:45 pm

What's he drinking, Wankerbrau?

Wile E. Quixote April 2, 2012 at 8:50 pm

And I can just see the Daily Callgirl headlines about Santorum's drinking and Rick Perry's pill-popping.

Alcoholism, Drug Addiction Increase Under Obama

rocktonsam April 2, 2012 at 9:27 pm

11:30 am ?
in Wisconsin?
between Rockdale and Cambridge we call that a,
Pussy

vtxmcrider April 2, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Cut the guy some slack. He needs something to wash away the taste of that early morning santorum.

FROTHY April 2, 2012 at 10:22 pm

OK, peeps, c'mon. You KNOW he's only swilling that stuff to show up Mint MorMoney (c. Helen Blazes).

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:09 pm

My fair Editrix, you are dancing fairly close to libel. lol And, if you get too close, he may flirt with you, and woo you, and then you'll end up having lovely, libelous babies, together.

LetUsBray April 2, 2012 at 11:14 pm

Lovely, libelous JAR babies, at that.

Jukesgrrl April 2, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Had I said the things Rick said about Dutch people, I would pretend I don't know what libel is.

Negropolis April 2, 2012 at 11:18 pm

Santorum? What a snob! What a slut!

DahBoner April 3, 2012 at 7:13 am

I think he needs to join AAA for the free tow…

ttommyunger April 3, 2012 at 7:47 am

Can't see the label clearly, but I'm betting it's an O'Doul's or some other non-alcoholic beer. I just don't see Little Ricky kicking back with a beer, any time of the day or night. Too much of a tight-ass. Plus, he would burn in Hell for eternity, also, too.

DocChaos April 3, 2012 at 11:52 am

He's Catholic, the religion that makes drinking wine a sacrament, so that won't be the reason he burns in hell.

ttommyunger April 3, 2012 at 12:52 pm

He'll prolly skate, then. Not sure being an ignorant dick by itself, justifies eternal damnation.

actor212 April 2, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Esh that Vimameemavagi-*hic*-vaginal? Take a shnort, pullllllllllllllllease

Swampgas_Man April 2, 2012 at 7:29 pm

I'll have two of what that nice man on the floor had, thank you.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: