How is Barack Hussein NOOBAamA disgracing the Oval Office NOW? He is cold just sitting on Pinterest, swapping recipes for Obama cakes and “pinteresting” (?) dreamy window treatments and the softest pashminas! Why is Obama Pinteresting when gas prices are so high? Shouldn’t Obama be transmitting to his Russian masters instead of gawking at adorable ways to decorate with pumpkins? IMPEACH!
Here is the Great Impostor’s Pinterest wall (board?), which is supposedly run by his campaign. It has recipes, and cakes, and “Obamart” and job growth charts. But why hasn’t Obama pinned the New Black Panther Party, huh? Why hasn’t he pinned his father, Bill Ayers? Most importantly, why, under “Obamart,” is there a Shepard Fairey portrait of Tom Hanks? Is it because Tom Hanks is racist? (Yes.) [CNET]
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Balls!
Cock.
You tall drink of bitch! I took a slug of coffee before I read your reply. That hurt like hell.
No, Barb, I am a tiny delicate flower of bitch. 5-2 (3?) representing. But I walk tall.
SLUTFIGHT!
5' 10" here and well worth the climb!
I just made lunch for Jeff to take to work and I always write a little love note for him. I wrote "BALLZ" and kissed him goodbye.
Together, you and I are 10'4"!
…les of my heart.
Poop!
~
Taint.
Jizm.
Nice try.
Hey! Meta! Didn't you used to have like -120p? What the hell happened?
Meta got banned from Big Breitfart, that's what happened.
No more -120 downfistings.
~
Blatant attempt to win the morning. A successful attempt, but still…ahem…ballsy
Were you raised by an Asian Tiger Mom!? None of the other kids want to be in the sack race, because they say you win everything!
SO, are you saying you WANT to be put in a crate so small you can't turn around?
Hey, Barack! Pin this, bro!
He’s welcome to pin me…
…though Michelle might bust his ass for doing so…
Where can I find his Mommy blog?!
http://wonkette.com/
MILF
In his Mommy jeans. Wut?
After Newt became a non-factor in the Republican primary, Obama lost pinterest.
Well, there ya go [spit!] Pintrest rhymes with "interest", which is what the banks charge in order to take money from us. [spit!] So, Obama is being controlled by the Fed and the World-Wide Jewish Commie Conspiracy through the Pintrest program. Interesting….. [spit!]
"Softest Pashminas"
Sounds muslin…
They ain't Muslim…. they's Persian. Which is much worse given we're at war with Persia.
We are, right?
Um, what the fuck is Pinterest? I've never heard of that before; does that mean I'm somehow out of the loop or not hip enough?
Yes, that is what that means.
It's like a giant bulletin board and you can post recipes and talk slime about icky boys and…
In other words, like Facebook and other mommyblogs, you get to post all sorts of interesting things that other people can comment on, and in exchange, the
Editrixproprietors get to exploit those interactions for profit.The problem is that once you comment, you get an email from everyone else who comments on whatever was posted (maybe there is a setting for this – I just deleted my entire account, because MY GOD, how useless). The constant emails wouldn't be a big deal if the women (always women) posting them could come up with something other than "So cute!". But no, it's always "So cute!"
We should go post this all over Obama's boards.
This is where is it good to have a daughter in publishing/design. She keeps me up-to-date on this stuff.
It's for girls. Are you a girl? So is Barack.
*Looks between legs* No, still no vagina there, so I guess not.
Hey, wait a minute! Are you posting here naked?
Isn't everybody? I thought that was a rule.
Ease of fapping
Pics or GTFO!
Well no, it's too cold for that today. But last week, when it was up in the 70s…
Still out of a job, Soros?
Probably NFSW but, Here you go
Someone, in a factory somewhere is on the assembly line for these things thinking, "what the fuck have I done with my life".
This reminds me of "The Vagina Song" by Willam Belli
I thought you and MissTaken commented all day in a sex swing, holding smartphones behind each other's backs.
Nah, we broke the sex swing during one of the Santorum threads.
You're looking at the wrong legs, dood. I *know* you have a vagina, you just keep it on a different coast.
It's Facebook for the illiterate.
I have it but I never use it. I guess I'm not pinteresting.
The Merch board has some pants that are allegedly "great for running or sun salutations." What a fucking hippie.
Anyone know where I can get some capris? For a dude, I mean; I am looking for pirate-type capris, with flared legs. Hey, you mentioned pants.
Preferably ones that have "JUICY" written across the ass?
I worry about you sometimes, Prommie…
laurapetrie.com
Psocializm!
Just missing a pic of the big bag of salted dicks that Obama will soon be asking the Supreme Court to choke on.
Page needs a hoodie.
Recipes for cakes we like: Coconut coated Lamb-of-God or Pagan Bunny?
Fetus shwarma
Pinterest I think our President’s advisors need to focus on their Kegel exercises and leave this reelection campaign to people that eat raw meat.
That would be me. Carpaccio, anyone?
Fucking Pintrest. One of these days, I'm going to invent anti-social media. You just wait….what?…It's called Twitter…shit…
WTF is Pinterest, anyhow? And who, if anybody, needs it?
At least we're finding out now who are really the chicks on Wonkette and who've only been pretending.
I understand it's a way for the percentage of the population with malfunctioning opposable thumbs to "share" Justin Bieber's coif shots.
Oh. They're going to make millions, aren't they?
He's just like Nero, or the cartoon version of Nero, at least.
Nero Wolfe?
I'll bet nobody reads those anymore.
If he were a real Amurikun, he'd be looking at porn.
Sorry Barry, but your dusky manliness is no match for the Romney clan's screaming pastels overlaying a field of blinding privileged whiteness.
Damn, that hurt.
Wow, that is one the the creepiest families I have ever seen. Is that the native costume of the tribe?
Jesus, is the King Family getting back together and going out on tour?
http://www.officialkingfamily.com/
Those can't be all of their kids, can it? Tell me there are some nieces and nephews in the mix.
I think they are just hiding the sister wives (down in the back).
The kids are cute as kittens. Too bad the progenitor had to be such a cockfuck.
They sure don't dress like they have money.
They DO. However, Money != Taste.
Back in the day, the Kennedys used to get the whole family together and play a touch football game. Mitt could start a new league.
Fer christ's sake, how come there was no NSFW warning on that link?
My eyes are bleeding
Dood, my fuckin' *genitalia* are bleeding, after looking at that. Because I ripped out all the working bits and pounded them with a GIANT mallet to make sure no progeny of mine would ever sully what's left of this beautiful earth.
"People" like this make me sick. He has a $100 million trust fund for his kids. Given how many kids each of *them* has had, their grandkids will be lucky to inherit two pennies. Unless, of course, they can rob the rest of us blind.
How is it possible that just his head is about the same size as a couple of those actual children?
group entertainment in gingham.
Fucking breeders. In other news, we're at the tipping point on global warming, and it's due to the Duggars and these Gumps, mostly.
Ain't seen that much gingham sine Petticoat Junction got cancelled…
I still don't know what pinterest is but I haven't figured out this MySpace thing either. Is pinterest on the AOLtubes or is it a store you go to?
Friend me on Friendster and I will tell you everything you need to know.
And we can have a riveting conversation about it on ICQ later as well!
I totally re-pinned "I Bark for Barack" on to my "Pets of Jihad" board.
I'm just pissed that you didn't give us the link to your "Pets of Jihad" board.
Does he have a page on Pooptrest too?
Well, if that's what the President, as my commander-in-chief, is doing instead of working, then I don't feel so bad about fucking off here at Wonkette during work hours.
♫ Nothing'll stop the US Air Force!! ♪
…the anonymity helps. I stay off Facebook during work hours, but I'm keenly staying on top of things here.
Wait–when did they change the lyrics from the original ♫Army Air Corps♫?
You are doing a GREAT service to your country by fucking around on the USAF's dime/time.
Barry also said that the new links box below the fold sucks ass.
I always KNEW Chet was *really* Barry!
You too???
I looked at that place, but I haven't any idea how to play it. Do you get guns or grenades?
When you figure it out, just remember. Don't play it on the tarmac.
Can someone get him a bigger fucking monitor? Do you want your Preznit to squint and enfeeble his eyes?
We could send him some carrots, too.
If he got one, the wingtards would be howling about how it was made overseas, and the bigger it was, the more elite (and waste-of-taxpayer-munniez) it would be.
Which is why he should get a 27" iMac, and let 'em all go fuck off.
Here I am on my 32" Mac display playing Zuma. Meanwhile Barry is on his 17" preparing a powerpoint presentation on how he will personally take everyone's guns away starting in 2013.
Dude, the Rethugs already got his hair going bad, now his eyeballs are gonna start melting? Hey, in my own personal experience, that's how it works anyway.
Dood, you KNOW it's all that, um, self-pleasuring you're doing in your burrow.
ETA: And just LOOK what it's done to your hairy palms!
I don't go to Pinterest because I can never decide if I prefer The Caretaker to The Birthday Party.
Hmmm … I always thought Obama was more of an Angry Birds kind of guy. This whole "Pinterest" thing sounds kind of fruity.
What, Angry Birds is the top download at all the U.S. military academies? Somehow I think not.
Yes, but did he begin multitasking, refreshing his Twitter feed on his iPad?
OT: Is there any rhyme or reason to the big fucking box of links now attached to the bottom of every post? Because I don't understand why I would be interested in months-old links that have no discernable connection to the article I just read. And why is the type so huge, for Christ's sake?
I found all of the articles to be interesting, informative, and very easy to fap to.
So they are connected?
Links come in, links go out…you can't explain it.
CK:
You're just a guy who likes to think outside of the box.
Most guys like to think very much INSIDE teh box, if you get my drift. And I b'leev you do.
The type is huge so the President can read it on his dinky little monitor, as you can see in the picture.
That, or I guess someone who now owns the place is fiddling with some of the levers and dials on the Intensedebate machinery.
The rhyme and/or reason, according to the Outbrain Content Recommendation FAQ, is thus:
Outbrain is the leading content discovery platform, recommending content you may find most interesting. Our platform provides publishers a service for recommended links to increase traffic and generate revenue, and marketers a way to distribute their content alongside publisher's own editorial recommendations in order to grow their audience.
Because I for one am extremely interested in "5 Celebs who regret their plastic surgery". Winning the advertising future!
What, no tips on how to forge a birff certificutt or how to weasle yer way into Harvard? Fucking asshole…
He posts those under his pseudonym "BillAyresplane"
What kind of Chicago thug is into Pinterest?
Is that the computer he faps to?
GOP lojik: Taking many vacations while pretending to clear brush and going all blinky on the world when the economize is about to shit the bed = Good.
A simple webpage for mostly family = bad.
I hear ObaMart has a great deal on bulk houndstooth pashminas.
The only reason a dude would be on Pinterest is to refer to it later in an effort to get laid. "Pretty busy day, you know, just cold Pint-ing some preeeetty interesting shit."
Jim got me started on the "just cold [verb]+ing" statements, so I've been just stone cold dropping them all over Facebook, and I have yet to start a trend. Haz sadz.
I've never seen his signature before. . . Can a signature be hott? Because <fans herself before swooning> mmhmmm.
Draw a line from the top of the B to the top of the O, and it gets even more exciting.
Dude. I totally see what you did there. What Barry did there. No wonder I felt feverish and, um, squishy.
That signature gets today's highest pness factor. Or is it largest? Hard to wrap my hand around it. The distinction.
I'll catch you guys later. I have to go take a cold shower and look at pictures of Haley Barbour.
Should take alla ten seconds of Ol' Haley to get you back to dry, baby.
I'm the only one I know not on facebook. I hate facebook.
So do the people on facebook.
Except when we can't get to it because the job blocked it from the firewall, the fucking rat bastards…
Not that we care or anything…
Yea, lemme go update my status to rant about this so all my friends can read about it.
I was on it when I was deployed in the Middle East, but have not been on it in 3 years now. I wonder if I'm missing much.
Wonder no more. All Suckerman has spent the last three years doing is making it worse.
Diaspora. It's still in beta, but SOMEday.
I also too hate facebook. I made a fb page but never go there because it's always stupid shit I don't want to deal with or people I don't really like/know want to "friend" me.
my bff is not on facebook, i'm on it and hate it and no, you're not missing anything.
i've said this elsewhere but it's like picking a scab.
Why do I have the feeling that there's an adult friend finder social media thingy called "Sinterest" in the making?
Trademark that, FAST!
Whatever you do don't 'bookmark' it though — Facebook ©®™ will rip you a new asshole and feed it to the pigeons, since they own all rights throughout the known universe to teh word "book". Oh fuck, I'm done for now…
Holy shit, if there isn't one, there needs to be.
Grab that URL now!
Uh, Rule 34?
Oh God no! I was just clicking around trying to find out what the deal was and, bam! http://pinterest.com/barbarabarnard/stevie-nicks-…
never ever will I go there again. It is a terrible place.
What have you got against gypsy rags, twirling, tambourines and cackle-singing?!
Damn. There are more pictures of Stevie Nicks on that page than in the entire rest of the internet.
That was bad but at least it wasn't Thomas Kinkade.
Damn, I never could suck shit up my nostrils and fap at the same time!
wanna bet barbara's a PUMA?
I know what I'm getting for my doggy. Thanks NOBAMARS!
Wow. Apropos of nothing here at Wonkette, I just typed the words "pictures of" (because I'm trying to stalk the new Affleck baby and then later today I'm going to have the letter "L" tattooed on my forehead) into the Google search box and here were the first two returns:
Pictures of Jesus
Pictures of herpes
Awesome.
What if you put a big ol' AND between those?
That's a decent summary of the decline of western civilization.
Maybe when Jesus visited the New World and traveled among the Mormons, he brought herpes back with him to Lourdes or Rome or wherever he ended up before founding the Merovingian dynasty, just like Columbus did for syphilis.
Townsend and Daltrey haz the sadz.
My favorite is typing "I hate it when" in Google and getting "I hate it when Hitler steals my Nutella" as a suggestion.
Phallus phus phpeople phshould phmake phup phwords…
What the phuck?
Phish!
Pintrest? One moar social
diseasemedia site to ignore. Thank you madam Editrix.What the phuck is that?
Can not have automatic ads popping up… especially ones that I can't shut off… with no sound card and a crap video card I just get jumpy static.
Please… make 'em stop.
POTUS is a vampire. GET AWAY FROM OUR FLOTUS!
http://barackobama.tumblr.com/post/16012899257/gu…
Oh my god, he is so adorkable.
Pinterest is blocked at work. I now hate my jerb a little less…
New "Jobs Act" goes to Obama today or tomorrow and will allow "Crowd Funding". By Saturday we should all have a hundred emails asking if we want to invest in the next greatest social media disease.
No Terry, I am not trying to curry favor. Hey Rebecca! I finished licking your car clean. Now what?
Video, please.
Dammit, this kills my whole theory about how Obama is the overgeared Gnome Druid that keeps ganking me in Stranglethorn Vale!
Forget the lawn chair – grab the video camera!
Notice that the photo shows Nobama only from the waist up. The minute the Pinsanity thing was done, he was back at the pornz.
bamz if you want to waste time on the interwebs, COME TO WONKETTE!!!
I think he's already here.
Uh … yeah, follow. That's the ticket.
Obamart?
IS THIS A GUM'MINT TAKEOVER OF A CORPORATION THAT SINGLEHANDEDLY DESTROYED THE AMERICAN MANUFACTURING INDUSTRY?
*pops popcorn* *cracks open a lovely, chilled bottle of Abita Strawberry Lager*
Clawing, hair-pulling and windmill-slapping, just like in grade school!!
I did that once for my wife. Not sure, maybe that is why I am divorced?
Okay, Barb, this is getting scary. I'M 5' 10" ALSO TOO.
Okay, so I'm not. But it's always been my fantasy height. I stopped at 5' 8 and 3/4. Story of my life, now that I think about it.
My baby drove up in a brand new Cadillac! She said "balls to you honey — I ain't never comin' back!!"
Boy, is he gonna be surprised.
You wrote a note to Jeff and then kissed him goodbye? Yea, that would do it.
I'm here for the hair-pulling, myself.
ooohhh…how is that beer. I lurvs me some Abita
Ooops! Don't tell Barb.
Yes Actor, I make Jeff's lunch every morning after I shave him. It seems that the 17 restaurants in his company don't make what he wants, a lunch made by me. I write him a love note every day. Today's note just said "BALLZ!"
And mud. There must be mud. Or jello.
Oh yes! Of course, this is Wonkette, so I'm sure they only use the cleanest dirt and spring water.
Their Strawberry is my fave of their seasonals, and it's hella hard to find outside of Louisiana. I would willingly blow David Vitter for a six pack, if only I could get Bobby Jindal's head out of the way.
What's that in your glass?
I'm Jus_Wonderin why he got two notes and two kisses, is all…
And lots of hair-tossing! Just like on those heavy metal music videos!
Could be worse, he could be the guy filling the bags of dicks…
Jus_wondering makes really good lunches!
I try. I try.
Yes, still unemployed and broke; thanks for reminding me.
I hear there are positions available on the Gingrich campaign!
Sorry, dude, it was just the part about people sitting at the computer in their underwear/nude that was me think of your status.
Strawberry beer?
Dude, that is so gay.
LOL, it's like you were a fly on the wall the day Mitt convinced Ann to finally stop porking her boyfriend-on-the-side.
Oh please, Lascaux. Like I'd suck down anything else.
Wait, what?
(Grabs pants, pulls them on)
Sorry for the delay in responding. That is my very own Extra Special Bitters…my favorite Fall brew. You know I've had a few when I take beer porn pics :)
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