poverty porn

Rick Santorum Welcomes You To Obama’s Murder Colony

Where farts come out of your earRick Santorum has taken a breather from losing the Republican presidential nomination to put out this ad, “Obamaville,” showing “a small, American town two years from now if Obama is reelected.” It shows poor people being poor and having no money, suffering from the financial maladies of the times. It’s just like how Obamaville is right now, or how Romneyville or Santorumville (gross) will be two years from now. (It is slightly better than Gingrichville, though, since it the residents haven’t nuked themselves.)

The best image is that of the fellow holding a gas pump to the temple of his head, as though to kill himself. Does he have any idea how much that would cost if he did it?

And then the living Real Americans, after having Obama take all of their money that they never had, just sit around watching Wall Streeters on their several television sets stacked atop each other. Despite the post-apocalyptic level of poverty afflicting Obamaville, it will apparently be the norm for these Americans to watch several television sets at the same time. So yeah, this rings true. Ace ad from Weird Rick!

[Political Wire]

About the author

Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

Comments

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  • memzilla

    But the danger from drowning in the toxic sludge at Santorum Acres would be worse.

    • Terry

      Don't forget all the poor women dying in childbirth. Fun times!

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        At least they'd be propped up out of the sludge by their transvaginal wands.

  • James Michael Curley

    Will my Farmville avitar work in Obamaville, cause that damn thing don't wanna work any where, just collect welfare.

  • Doktor StrangeZoom

    I would go to church and pray that this never happens, but OBAMA HAS CLOSED ALL THE CHURCHES!!!!!!

    • tcaalaw

      Indeed, all of 'em, Katie!

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Alas, Babylon!

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Shouldn't that read "All Ass, Babylon"?

    • Guppy

      See what happens when you don't bomb Persia?

  • sezme

    Well, expensive though it may be, at least it's gasoline that comes out of that pump, not that frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that's sometimes the byproduct of electing Rick Santorum President.

  • SoBeach

    How could that ad NOT start with the ominous and obligatory "In a world…"

    Fail.

    • Doktor StrangeZoom

      Don LaFontaine is gone, and we live in a diminished age.

      In a world…where voiceovers no no longer say "in a world…" (Because Obama has eliminated freedom, mostly)

      • not that Dewey

        They could get the guy from "The President's Speech"…

        In a world where a Don LaFontaine impersonator lays voiceovers on a parody video for Obama…

  • memzilla

    Welcome to Santorum Acres

    Dagny Taggart, Mayor

    Schwarzen und Braunen sind hier nicht erwünscht!

  • BaldarTFlagass

    I liked the Randall Flagg reference at the beginning, with the crows. Also, a little subliminal racism with that, neh? Crows, get it?

  • tihond

    Santorum: ""Race War's on everybody! It's going down! Shit is going down!"

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    Needs moar Justin Timberlake in an Uncle Sam costume with a boombox handing out death panel notices.

    • MadBrahms

      I think I just had that dream. Damn, I gotta stop reading Wonkette before bedtime.

      • memzilla

        "I gotta stop reading Wonkette before bedtime sober."

        /fixed.

    • tcaalaw

      Très Southland Tales!

  • Doktor StrangeZoom

    I like the very subtle bit where, at the words "sworn American enemy," the TV screen flashes between images of Ahmadinejad and Obama. It's a thoughtful contribution to responsible political discourse.

    • freakishlywrong

      I'm surprised there was no subtle shot of a birf certificate. Rick's.

    • Callyson

      They were talking about that on NPR, and the Santorum lackey, I mean spokesperson, was seriously trying to deny that they were trying to equate Obama and Ahmadinejad. "No, we were just alluding to his failed Iran policy."
      Why the reporter's response was not to ROTFL, I have no idea…

      • GOPCrusher

        I guess I don't understand why, after the Somali pirates, Osama Bin Laden, and Muammar Quadaffi (Quadaffy, Ghadafi, etc.) they still believe that they can try to tie the President to Islam.
        Do they really believe that pandering to the less than 20% of the American population that believe that shit, is really the way to win the election?
        But after the Etch-A-Sketch fiasco of last week, the answer has to be, yes. Yes they do.

        • CthuNHu

          Normal, non-sociopathic person: This evil, horrible, despicable, defamatory thing I could say about this person I don't like is glaringly false, so I won't say it.

          Sociopathic person: This evil, horrible, despicable, defamatory thing I could say about this person I don't like is glaringly false, so I will say it over and over with whirling fury and conviction.

  • Barrelhse

    I'm stacking my television sets TODAY!
    WAKE UP SHEEPLE!

    • BaldarTFlagass

      I only have flat screen TVs, which don't stack well at all. What to do?

  • MadBrahms

    Where's the guillotine in the town square, Rick? You promised!

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      "Executorville"!

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    That Christian baby in the red onesie looks delicious!

    • memzilla

      Goes great with matzoh, chitlins, and cheesy grits!

      • freakishlywrong

        I like cheesy grits. And catfish.

    • chicken_thief

      It's just the right length!

    • not that Dewey

      That chick in the kitchen at 0:20 is kinda hot. Maybe I'll vote for Santorum!

  • BaldarTFlagass

    I am sure that Rod Serling was a typical hollywood liberal, and would not approve of this message.

    • HistoriCat

      Rod Serling was a Unitarian – obviously he was a liberal and a commie.

  • cheetojeebus

    Rod Serling is gonna claw his way out of his grave and literally skull fuck the editor and narrator of this in anger.

  • Dashboard Buddha

    Oh what tribulating times we life in when a bullet is cheaper than a squirt of gas.

  • LiveToServeYa

    Ain't watching this. I try and avoid stepping in Santorum.

  • MadBrahms

    Please, we all know Gingrichville would be on the moon.

  • freakishlywrong

    That nice, christian, down home working man's hero, Rick Santorum is quite a lying asshole.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Was that filmed in an old Pennsylvania steel town?

  • OC_Surf_Serf

    Prefer to imagine living in Hooterville…right up the brooke from Buttsecksville.

    • LetUsBray

      Right along the Santorum River.

  • freakishlywrong

    "Every Man is an Island. You're on your own. Vote Republican."

  • MadBrahms

    Holy crap what's with the blinking nightmare tree at 0:46? Anyone else see that? Gyah!

    • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

      I cannot watch it here from work. But the still shot, shown above, reminds me of "Lost Highway" promo/ imagery. So the "blinking nightmare" I'm picturing right now is one Robert Blake, in greasepaint, uttering that horrible laugh to terrorize Bill Pullman over the phone.

    • Doktor StrangeZoom

      It's part of Obama's insane regulatory restrictions on manufacturers: All trees must now be equipped with high beams.

      • freakishlywrong

        And be the right height.

        • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

          And hang heavy with strange fruit.

    • SkinnyNerd

      The shot at the end with all the trees reminded me of Twin Peaks. Damn, I really liked that show. Looks like a wonderful place to live. Now where's Bob?

      • Doktor StrangeZoom

        The anal froth is not what it seems.

  • ThankYouJeebus

    And the new Abortionplex is driving all the mom & pop Ye Olde Abortion shops out of business.

    • MadBrahms

      Time was you could get an abortion for a nickel and stop by the gumball machine on the way out. Why do you hate America, Obama?

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        Onion belt. I'll bet nobody ever thought of THAT before!!

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        I remember running down to the corner abortion shop with a quarter in my hand, and picking out the fetuses I wanted to abort.

        "Gimme six of them, and four of them, and can I have the root beer candy one? I'll deliver the papers to old Mrs. Johnson for ya!"

        Now, I gotta buy them by the jumbo bag with a discount card. And that means I have to pick the blacks ones out to enjoy the others.

        • GOPCrusher

          Those Sam's Choice fetuses certainly don't have that same homemade taste that I remember from my youth.

    • Biff

      You can't compete against 12 operating theaters, you just can't.

  • smashedinhat

    Where were the Obama sponsored hobo fights?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Didn't you see them on the TV just before the political ads to re-re-elect Obama/Ahmadinejad '14?

  • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

    "Can switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Has Barack Obama authorized FEMA, the Justice Department and the IRS to establish White Slavery?

    • MadBrahms

      That attack ad would've been a whole lot better if he farmed it out to RonCo.

    • Doktor StrangeZoom

      A [your town here] mom discovered this one weird trick to flatten your stomach and turn over American sovereignty to the UN. Click here to find out more!

  • hollywooddood

    Santorumville is where no one has sex unless the Ayatollah Santorum says it's okay.

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    Oh irony. Santorum is pissed because we never listened to him and his ilk during the blowing up of the housing bubble. If we had listened to the wingnuts (ie done nothing) when the world economize nearly shit the bed in 08/09, we'd all be neck deep in economic Santorum.

  • SorosBot

    Why is it a stupid small town, instead of an actual city where real Americans live?

    • MadBrahms

      Anyone who takes mass transit is not a Real American.

    • ThundercatHo

      Because then they would have to show urban youths in hoodies and saggy pants standing around on street corners eating Skittles and Rick's crack team decided it wouldn't be a good time to rile up the blahs.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Because cities themselves were obliterated by Ahmadinejad's sekrit weppuns program that only a Presnidet Santorum could have wiped out.

    • Callyson

      Cities scare Frothy. They're filled with blahs, people who have recreational sex, and non closeted gheyz.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Odd it doesn't end with Rick Santorum tearing down a snow-covered street shouting, "Merry Christmas, you beautiful building and loan!"

    • Tundra Grifter

      actor212;

      I was thinking the same thing! Somebody saw "It's a Wonderful Life" too many times.

      That's probably Li'l Ricky's answer when someone at FoxPAC asks him another gotcha question: "What's your favorite movie?"

    • Guppy

      When doesn't he loudly proclaim his love for a bank?

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        The dark secret of the Santoum campaign is his multiple arrests for sexually assaulting the night deposit slots.

        • Guppy

          And he refuses to allow the banks access to emergency contraception!

        • EmileZoloft

          Marriage is not, you know, man on dog, man on bank, that sort of thing.

  • PuckStopsHere

    Needs moar Demon Sheep. But that's all. Other than that, it is PERFECT!

  • RadioStalingrad

    Yeah, but the Abortionplex will be all shiny and new.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Wastin' away again down in Obamaville.
    Lookin' for my lost ACORN vote
    Some people claim that there's a Repub-lickin' to blame
    But I know, it's the damn Negro's fault.

  • littlebigdaddy

    Ricky's just reminding us not to re-nig.

  • ThundercatHo

    I think they raided Romneyville a couple of years ago and took all the kids but then America marveled at the sister-wives amazing hairdos and gave them all back.

  • BaldarTFlagass

    Needs more Walker Evans, Dorothea Lange, and Gordon Parks.

    • stncmchnc

      Needs more Walken, Christopher….and cowbell.

    • Callyson

      Diane Arbus or GTFO.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Needs more Walking Dead.

  • UW8316154

    Looks like a trailer for The Stand, now I can't get 'Don't Fear The Reaper" out of my head.

  • prommie

    Needz moar coughing man and kid pushing a shopping cart.

  • Lucidamente1

    And everybody has to wear a hoodie.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    This can't be true! There were no Kwanzaa decorations! No Happy Ramadan cards!

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    Needs more flesh eating zombies!

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    The best image is that of the fellow holding a gas pump to the temple of his head, as though to kill himself.

    Dude. He's diesel-powered!

  • http://www.flickr.com/photos/30500320@N06/ DerrickWildcat

    There are still birds. So I am ok with Obamaville.

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      Don't tax the poop creators!

    • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com FROTHY

      DerrickWildcat, you so the funny.

  • UW8316154

    Looks an awful lot like Wasilla right now, but needs moar Wal-Mart and tattoo parlors.

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    If only those poor people had been snobby enough to go to college. Then they wouldn't have to live in haunted houses and practice cannibalism.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/mrblifil mrblifil

    Plenty of stock photography and stock video footage tossed in there. History shows Republicans never, but never, pay for permission to use stock photos and video. Also: worst. Gay. Porn. Evar.

  • BarackMyWorld

    Obamaville?

    These Facebook games are getting out of hand.

  • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

    Santorum could take a tip or three from the original McCain campaign media team: vintage wonkette headlined, "Barack Obama is Personally Raising Your Gas Prices."

    'Tanks' for the memories, Newell!~

  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    I'm pretty sure I saw that movie. It was better than " the grudge" but not as good as "the children of the corn".

    • Chichikovovich

      This is the latest sequel: "Children of the Ethanol Subsidy".

  • http://www.facebook.com/pages/Johnny-Appletruth/133951326629923?sk=wall deanbooth

    fellow holding a gas pump to the temple of his head

    "Eat unlead, punk!"

  • mavenmaven

    At least in Obamaville the poor people will have insurance and not be turned away at the hospital admissions office as they are now. In Santorumville the rich people will be partying as they foreclose on the people shown in this video.

  • Chichikovovich

    That place is paradise! They have full bowls of fruit on the table, they're driving new SUV's, have nice looking watches on their wrists (is the smoker giving us the eyeball at 0:52 supposed to be George Zimmerman?) and they have color TV's! These people aren't "poor"! They're wealthy beyond the imagining of people in other countries!

    [And at 0:12, is that one of those $300 basketball shoes I keep reading about on right-wing sites?]

  • http://my.execpc.com/~artkm/rabbit_hole.html MilwaukeeKent

    Still looks likes Bushville from here. Clintonville, on the other hand, is booming!

    • MadBrahms

      Banging, even.

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    Gingrichtown is on the moon.

  • stncmchnc

    Let's not go to Obamaville, 'tis a silly place.

  • chascates

    Rick Santorum is no George Bailey.

  • Limeylizzie

    Needs moar Union actors.

  • north_of_moscow

    That does look kinda scary, but at least we'll still have porn.

  • Doktor StrangeZoom

    It really tied the whole room together, man.

    • horsedreamer_1

      & some Guantanamero pissed on it.

  • chicken_thief

    Fuck that place. I want to go some place happy. I'm moving to Niggerhead, where I understand the gaity is non stop.

  • not that Dewey

    Need a small, post-industrial town in ruins? We got that B-roll! Need a family standing in a kitchen wondering where their next meal will come from? We got that B-roll. Need a shot of a fellow holding a gas pump to the temple of his head, as though to kill himself? NO! THAT'S TOO SPECIFIC! THAT'S NOT B-ROLL!

    • Toomush_Infer

      I liked that shot: Gas! Gas! Into my head and out of my Ass….

  • kakotechnia

    And no one can make a response ad for "Santorumistan" because A Handmaid's Tale already exists.

  • Toomush_Infer

    I forget…what District is Santorum from….?….and are all his kids eligible for the Reaping?…

  • Callyson

    "Imagine a small American town two years from now if Obama is re – elected"
    Heavy red lipstick will come back in style?

  • elgin_pelican

    This clip was the winner in the US Chamber of Commerce Sims Tournament.

  • owhatever

    In Rickville, everything is happy and gay. Well, at least happy. Gays not allowed.

  • EmileZoloft

    The shady guys in the smoke-filled room, right? They're writing their own notes and drinking out of those cheap styrofoam coffee cups you get at gas stations. What the hell are they supposed to symbolize? They're too poor to be Fat Cats, too cheery to be Union Thugs, and too white to be Darks (the most ethnic-looking is Horatio Sanz).

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      It's an AA meeting.

  • EmileZoloft

    Imagine a small American town two years from now if Obama is re-elected.
    Playground equipment is creaky, and childrens' shoelaces go untied.
    Sexy librarians don't let you talk, while outdoors large turds roam the streets.
    Families appreciate produce and Diane Arbus, and hospitals have empty beds.
    Your tank holds over 37 gallons, and with gas under $2.50 a gallon people are using it to wash their hair. Whoops, better put out that candle!
    Old people are still creepy — where does the time go?
    Meanwhile, Max Headroom pre-enactors watch Ahmadinejad and his cloned Crimson Guard parade, symmetrical trees are evil, cheers! I'm drinking water!
    Labor law is so bad, I got fired for having a plant at my desk – and I work at home!
    Lewis Black is cruising around your neighborhood in a minivan, ranting about the Blair Witch Project, people who can't spell, cold sores, and people who stand too close to the camera.
    Obamaville – seriously, this is parody-proof.

  • ttommyunger

    Watched it three times, have no difficulty fapping to it.

  • DahBoner

    Who wants to live in a town with NO PORN????!???

    You would be forced to drawing pictures in the dirt with a stick and then Fapping to that!

    Lame…

  • http://www.kalimao.blogspot.com FROTHY

    What the FUCK is Dick Cheney doing in that video?

  • horsedreamer_1

    Wastin' away, ag'in, in Obamaville, lookin' for my lost fakir of exalted Allah…

  • Negropolis

    For Paulville, all they'd have to do is run a clip of Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome.