Our old pal Jon McNaughton, the hero behind such paintings as 2009′s One Nation Under God (The Jesusy-Constitution one) (Don’t forget the Blood Remix!) and 2010′s The Forgotten Man has produced this new masterwork, One Nation Under Socialism, which you can purchase for a mere $345. What does it mean, this work of paintery in which Barack Obama is just stone cold lightin’ the Constitution on fire? Jon McNaughton will answer all of your questions.
McNaughton has provided an actual Answer Sheet to explain the painting. Oh boy!
So there ya go: Pottage and whatever. Buy it NOW!
{ 541 comments }
Someone should paint a picture of me burning a McNaughton painting.
That's a subject for photography, not brushwork.
Or perhaps video would be better…
Good topic for an investigative kegger.
Or burning McNaughton…
figuratively speaking, of course.
With votes!
I swear, those things you see on my piece of work are surveyor's marks.
I saw what you did there…
And then he would paint a picture of White Jesus burning THAT painting.
And then a Margaret Keane painting of a sad girl burning the White Jesus burning DrunkIrishman burning the McNaughton painting…
At which point Thomas Kincade would arrive and spoil everybody's fun.
You'd have so much fire and flame at that point, and so much absurdity, that Kincade might be just the man to do it.
OOH! But Bob Ross could add some happy little trees!
Tommy K could piss on it and put the fire out.
hey now, I'm not only the Jesus but also a Drunk Irishman (at least right now, @ 3 AM)
Dood, you're even LATER to the party than I am!
Us night owls should start a conversation among ourselves.
A picture of you burning a McNaughton painting, of you burning a Mcnaughton painting.
send me a photo…
This "artist" has such a vivid imagination and clear mental illness.
It is a shame that neither seems to make his work any good.
Needs more lobotomies.
Paging Nurse Ratched!
I know, right? His POV might be excused if his work had any power. Instead, it's just mediocre dreck.
You're not kidding. That doesn't even look like Obama. I thought it was Robert Downey, Jr.
Apparently this McNotanartist character got his artist credentials from the back of a comic book.
Maybe we can all chip in our daily liquor allowance and commission him to paint a picture of George W. using the Constitution to wipe his ass. And yes, by "ass" I mean Dick Cheney.
I'm so ashamed of myself for posting that last sentence.
Allow me to correct myself: Dick Cheney is not an ass. He's what Bush wiped.
Fixed.
Well, Dick Cheney uses George W. to wipe *his* ass, so it all works out.
….chip in our daily liquor allowance …
uhhhhhhhh, no.
I knew I was treading on sacred ground.
How about if we chip in the kids' college savings? Oh, wait. Same thing.
thanks, I just posted that to the moron's FB page (curious to see how long it stays on?)
Why would he even *have* a FB page? It's just another way to let all the hatey-hatey people c'mon over and hate all over his wall.
His haters are his motivators.
Crystal meth, also.
Exactly. Look what it did for Van Gogh. Wait – that was syphilis.
I think you mean Gaugain, leaving his mark on Tahiti….
Jon McNaughton, report to your local Post Office or Amtrak station for immediate boarding on the next FEMA Death Train.
FEMA = Find Every Mormon Around.
- Mor(m)on –
What a slut.
Bonsoar, Poupe-y-tête.
Didn't John Wayne Gacy paint too? I'm just sayin'.
Hitler too, don't forget….
He could paint an entire apartment in one afternoon. Two coats!
Goddamn it!
Something tells me increased funding for the arts might be a good investment. Imagine if that Little Corporal had found a job, any kind of job, maybe hand-lettering sentimental dreck. How much better the world would have been!
To think, a shitty postcard artist from Austria (Redneck Germany) ends up taking over Europe. You couldn't write shit like this.
I think you just missed a chance to say "you know who else wanted to be a painter?" and have the answer actually be the short-mustached one for real.
Charlie Chaplin?
Well fuck me!!
I feel your pain, Chet.
He was a clown too!
And he was a Clown. Two strikes. Well, three, with all those murders and all.
He was a serial murderer too.
We can never forget these things. Thank goodness we have Michele Bachmann to remind us that "… just like John Wayne was from Waterloo, Iowa." and she will carry on the tradition: "That's the kind of spirit that I have, too"
I know that I'll sleep better tonight.
Thanks for the meringue tip. And I need to find trampdirt and thank her or him, or them.
And very big thanks for the ricotta recipe. I had no idea.
See? Some of us thought that when a woman bought "our" wonket that the most potty mouthed and funniest political snark anywhere in the internet tubes would also be a recipe exchange.
Just wait until Sara Benincasa comes back and hosts a quilting bee.
I'd bee happy to be hosted in a quilt with the scrumplicious Ms. Benincasa.
HEY, my imaginery girlfriend!!!
OK, you got me back for saying "Hitler" earlier today.
Or you could go to Red State and be part of a recipe for disaster exchange.
About as well, yeah.
Ever see his clown paintings? Pretty bad, but an excellent diagnostic tool. I'd say this guy has some "issues" too.
Stop it. you're frightening me.
Apparently, you can't even say intreegued! No, that's not a typo or a misspelling, it's an oversensitive scriptbot scripted to catch any mention of Toad's youngest child.
And all I did was call you babycakes and ask what could possibly have frightened you!
Stop talking about the Clowns. You know how I get.
And no trying to get around the Script Censor, either. It's there for our own protection.
When you burn the Constitution it turns into shit? Or is that santorum. Must be santorum.
"When you burn the Constitution it turns into shit?"
No, when you burn the Constitution, the *country* turns into shit.
For reasons known only to Mel Brooks, I now have that delightful church scene from Blazing Saddles playing in my head with accompanying song, specifically the line: "Our town is turning into shit."
Whatever it is, Evil Obama wants to make sure we notice it.
Evil Obama doesn't sneak up to the Constitution, strike a match and light it, and then quickly dart away, hoping nobody saw him do it. No, Evil Obama grabs the Constitution by the scruff of its preamble, lights it on fire, and then stands there holding the Constitution in your face, staring you straight in the eye while he points at the flames. "Yeah, I did that, mother-fucker. You see what I did? That's your precious Constitution going up in flames right there. Mother-fucker."
Evil Obama doesn't even need a goatee.
Honey badger don't give a fuck.
I don't think our Hopey *can* grow a goatee. He seems to have very little face-n-body hair.
I'm waiting for the Cthulhu version… again.
I'm tempted to start making one, myself. Except I don't think I have the genius to match the last one.
Sorry, Cthulhu eats the Constitution. Or so I've heard. Shhhhhhhh!
I just nibbled the edges, a little
Not yet! You have to wait until Nyarlathotep gets here. You know this!
Oh, really?
I ferdot!
I'd like to see him do a lithograph of Sarah Palin's pants on fire, if you know what I mean.
That one's hanging in her Gynecologist's office.
That's not a painting. That's a photographic warning to the ladies as to what will happen if they don't take care of their lady-parts.
"Don't let this happen to You!"
On the other wall is a photo of the Duggar family and an ad for Lo-Ovral.
OT but do you suppose it's mere coincidence that, in the wake of all the forcible rape by transducer legislation recently passed, that I (who have been looking for a job for almost 2 years, and of course, the interwebs know this) should have received an email solicitation from "ultrasoundtechnicianeducation" inviting me to "learn how to be an ultrasound technician" and encouraging me to "get a glimpse into a new life."? And do you suppose the irony in that last sentence is unintentional?
I will have to investigate whether this program is funded by the socialist government and if so start a petition demanding that my tax dollars not be used for the rapey purposes whatsoever, even if it WOULD positively impact the unemployment numbers. Amiright?
Woah! So, all this Pudendal Probing Legislation is merely a Jobs Program in disguise? Who knew! I just assumed it was the end product of the religious fanaticism that's taken over one of our major political parties over the last 25+ years.
I'll bet there's no Government money in this program, if you look. I think it's funded by some nice Churches and Church organizations, like the Westboro Baptist Church and Operation Rescue.
Right, because the bible thumpers would never take everyone's tax money to further their agendas.
Oh thanks, Barb, I just had a mental image of Sarah Pee in hot pants.
Oh, never mind, personal responsibility and all that – obviously a product of my own brain damage.
STOP THAT IT'S DISGUSTING
Needs moar Hitler moustaches.
Oh, for fuck's sake.
You know, that's basically my response too… I can't drum up any snark here.
Edit: …Yet.
Or, in Santorum Speak, procreation: The ONLY thing that can sake a fuck.
Say, you know which other right-wing nutjob was also a failed painter… ?
Joe was a 'plumber,' not a 'painter.' Easy mistake.
You must not have kids. They ALL start out by fingerpainting with their own shit.
Are you a step-padre, or do you have
bratsdarling angels of your own?Leonardo da Vinci?
Yeah, but he liked the boys, so he doesn't count. Plus, he was sciency and shit.
Um…..one of the Nixons, maybe?
Glenn Beck was a failed finger painter.
That wasn't finger paint he used.
Begging your pardon, but that wasn't his FINGER he used.
That would explain why the strokes were so small.
poop
No wonder Li'l Rick "ManOnDog" was looking so … um, pained.
Ooh! Ooh! I know! I know!
Nixon?
Churchill?
VanGogh? Oh wait, he was a painting nutjob who was also a failed right-winger…
Or he cut off his right wing.
George W Bush? Oh wait, coloring books don't count, do they?
coloring inside the lines is good, but it hardly counts as painting, except maybe in the Thomas Kinkade school
This guy is a painter?!?!
No, no, it's a misspelling. He's a POINTER. See? He's got some strange man in a pitcher POINTING at something.
That terrible German guy….
David Hasselhoff?
Hitler could paint an entire apartment in one afternoon, two coats!
Thomas Kincade?
I always wanted a president with fingers of asbestos-coated steel.
Imagine how fast he could ASL-sign with such things! It'd be a blur!
Then Romney's your 'bot!
Or a musician with fingers of steel, for bluegrass guitar, banjo pickin' and such.
I bet it makes a lot more sense after a mess of pottage.
Do you like the way he drops a reference he thinks shows he's smart?
It's not to show he's smart, it's to rope in the talibangelical rubes. Yes, it really is that easy to do.
If he really were smart, he would discuss the semiotics of political discourse, and refer to a "pot of message."
McNaughton is so right about gubbermint intervention. When GOD sends his whirly death funnels to the midwest thousands of souls end up unjustly escaping because of the socialist Weather Service Tornado Warning entitlement program.
I really want to see a "Whirly Death Funnel Warning" appear on the screen now.
Is that a warning for funnel cakes at the State Fair?
IF THAT DAMN MICHELE OBAMA GETS HER WAY!
Leave my FLOTUS ALOOOOOOONE!!!
If not, they should definitely come with warnings: May make your ass explode.
Shouldn't that be "ASSplode"? In the interest of, you know, accuracy and shit.
He might think that the government was starting to get the message. Illinois has been refused FEMA aid to cover the recent tornado damage.
WTF? The dumb okies who don't believe in the government doing anything but protecting their gun rights have gotten boat loads of tornado damage.
Can't believe Thomas Kinkade didn't beat him to it.
Not enough light!!! when your president is blah.
Probably because he got stuck on a long line at the 7-11 while trying to buy PBR and the latest issue of "Gigantic Asses".
"Some of my best friends burn the constitution. Wait! What?"
–Mitt Romney
Silly nounverb911, Mitt's friends own the constitution.
Maybe, but they generously lease it back to our government for a nominal annual fee.
Yeah, but can he do it on an Etch a Sketch?
Etch-a-Sketchers do it exclusively with the opposite sex. They're SOOO straight.
Uh, from the looks of his latest painting, I think he'd be more likely to use a Retch a Sketch.
You forgot the Dubyuh.
Probably not, but that stage hand from the old "Friends" series could.
"Our federal government has been moving in the direction of socialism for over one hundred years"
Roughly coinciding with the rise of the US as a great power…
What was the problem again?
My question is "Why did he wait until a blah person took the presidency to get upset if it's actually taken that long? HEHHHHNGG?"
Exactement!
Where was the great American artist Jon McNaughton back in 1910?
HEHHHHNGG is my new favorite word! Omg, you are AWESOME. And I mean that in spite of the fact that I just hehhhhngged the mucousy contents of my nasal passages all over my iPad.
Taft Libel!!
There is good and bad in everything.
True … some perfectly good paint went into that thing.
McNaughton uses only lead-based paints because its socialist to use lead free.
Can you picture (so to speak) this wingnut being forced to put EPA and CPSC warning stickers on his canvases?
Bammers is putting his finger right up into the flames and then pulling it away at the last second, going "fffffttt…. hothothothot."
No way, he's going Full Liddy on that fire.
I sure hope the president doesn't hurt his hands from the fire. Fire hot!
Satan isn't bothered by flame; flame is bothered by Satan. Sort of like Chuck Norris.
Wait a sec… has anyone ever seen Chuck Norris and Satan together, in the same place?
One of them's not real, and the other one is Satan.
Well, doh.
Hot damn! (pun intended) I have been wondering what to get the in-laws for Jesus' birthday next year! I hope they don't think he is just trying to get someone to put the fire out. That would totally spoil it!
The part about separation of Church and State is crayoned over in that rendition.
Oh for fucks sake. Fucking enough already.
Hey, now, speak for yourself!
Whoa…. "Oh for fucks sake. Fucking enough already."
Speaking personally, I know I haven't fucked anything like enough.
Shouldn't there be scary music too?
Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D minor. You know, like in the original Rollerball.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FXoyr_FyFw
Carl Orff's "O Fortuna" or GTFO.
Good call.
How about 'Fire' by The Crazy World of Arthur Brown http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCU5hTCynkQ
Mussorgsky's "Night on Bald Mountain?"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8Ca_edg6RE
That could work, too.
Is there some kind of music that's simultaneously rap AND heavy metal?
If not, this ought to do very nicely:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zE-rD8vcY4U
FYI, for those who enjoy this sort of thing, go to youtube and type "Requiem for a Dream Nicolas Cage". Four minutes of Nicolas Cage losing his shit montage.
Rap metal came and went 20 years ago.
Any Meatloaf song?
Well, yes. Unfortunately, though (and by "unfortunately" I mean "THANK YEW JEEZUS"), Celine Dion is recovering from vocal cord surgery.
“I pledge allegiance to the United States of America, And not to an ideology,
which can never stand, One nation under socialism, divisive, With no liberty or justice for anyone.”
What, no mention of GOD?!? What, is this guy one of those immoral atheists or something?
"One nation under Canada"
–Robin Williams?
Fucking amateur. He didn't even paint it on velvet- some artist.
One nation under clean air,food safey and a highway system, and national parks.
NO WAY. Asthma, trichinosis, gridlock and blight for all! U-S-A! YEEHAW!
And the aquaduct?
Law and order!!!
SVU!
CSI !!
A little pity for the guy, eh? No matter where he goes in the room, Barry's eyes are always following him, following him, following him…
I was going to belittle you for implying that one is to be pitied if Barry's eyes followed one around the room, because I, for one, would be pleased as punch to labor under such a happy delsuion. Then I remembered that the guy in this picture resembles Obama about as much as the 2012 Republican Presidential Primary resembles sanity. So never mind.
Yeah! If it wuz BARRY's eyes, every woman in town would be screaming for more. And wetting their knickers, too.
ETA: And quite a few of teh men, too, I should think. (wipes drool)
In the artist's defense, all o' them blah people look alike AMIRITE?
I will admit it is one of the better black velvet paintings I've seen.
Yeah, fairly decent brush technique for being as utterly shitfaced on Black Velvet like McNaughton gets.
Did Barack light the Constitution on fire? Because then it could just be an accident, he was smoking, dropped a match, etc.
Or did he just touch it, and it spontaneously combusted?
Nothing about this painting suggests that Obama started the fire. In fact, Obama looks like he's pointing at the fire with the look of a really pissed-off parent, and saying, "Here, see this? This is fire. Did you do this, George? Did you? Do you have any idea how long this is going to take me to clean up!? That's it, you're grounded. Go to your state and clear brush. And I don't want to see you hanging out with those delinquents Willard, Ricky and Newton ever again.
Good point, Abandon.
I just read that Mitt gave a shout-out to W, saying Bush saved America from a depression, not Obama.
Oh, for the love of Benji. There are just no words.
Oh, I've got a word: HEHHHHNGE?!?!
Keep going, Mitt! We absolutely want to keep talking about what Bush did and didn't do right up until November. At the convention, make sure you put that abused, humble Christian patriot on prime time to talk about it at length.
He's just begging for an Obama rogering, isn't he?
Indeed.
Bush also got us out of Iraq. Oh wait…in, out, same thing right?
Troops go in, troops (minus a few thousand) go out. You can't explain it.
Maybe YOU can't, but I've got one HELLUVAFUCKING explanation.
That's what Mrs.Glenn Beck said. "You really can't FEEL the difference."
If Obama ain't happy, ain't no one happy!
Spot on!
Yeah – if anything, it's clearly someone to the right of Obama who started that fire.
He's saying "Look, they wrote 'Places of chusing Senators'. CHUSE OR LUSE, HAW HAW"
Weird! I wasn't aware that capitalism was even mentioned in the Constitution.
Hey he stole the album cover of my band's new heavy metal tribute album
The caption should be, 'where the fuck were you when your precious Dubya and his cronies were wiping their asses with this?"
Or like Patton Oswalt put it, jumped over the Bill of Rights with Dick Cheney in the General Lee on a weekly basis.
At least that would have been entertaining.
Um, I think his name is "Boss Hogg" when he's got the General Lee clamped under his chapped buttocks.
The caption should be, 'where the fuck were you when your precious Dubya and his cronies were wiping their asses with this?"
Not sure he has the artistry to paint telling people that had valid disagreements with the Bush regime to "go move to France" in between impotent threats.
Maybe he could just notate it with explanatory comments, like he did with the other ones.
Maybe he could paint Bush holding a container of Freedom Fries in one hand and a bottle of Viagra in the other while Cheney, in the background, dips his pen in the bloodied open leg wound of an American soldier in order to sign the Halliburton contract that made him even more rich? No?
I like this. Better yet, make it a soldier with his head blown apart. God knows we've got a ton of servicemembers with brain damage thanks to that goddamned war.
I can certainly see Thomas Kinkade's influence on McNaughton.
I dunno. It sorta has that trademark Thomas Kinkade "Caution – Filling May Be Hot!" lighting aspect.
"Thomas Kinkade: Painter of Crap" This one is my favorite.
Well, Kinkade is the "painter of light".
You should check out painteroflight.com
Did McNaughton move his factory to China, too?
Some pretty good parody versions here:
http://www.somethingawful.com/d/photoshop-phriday…
That's wonderful!
Kinkade's stuff makes my teeth ache.
The companion piece is Newt burning a marriage certificate.
TWO marriage certificates, there fixed for ya
Use a dab from you tube of cerulean blue in all of the spaces marked "5."
Non-snark. Why '5'?
'Cause I have a photograph I took [when on vacation in Charleston] that when I zoomed in on the foreground cobblestones, I can clearly see a number five written on a tiny stone. I had no idea it was there.
This is spooky.
Why is Fred Armistan burning that?
It's OVER! This Constitution is OVER!!
Good idea!
I can't put my finger on who this looks like. Fred Armisen meets Martin Landau?
Next in the series is a nostalgic piece featuring Hillary Clinton urinating on a bible, future subjects will include Michelle force feeding arrugula to a crying child, and a special portrait of the president paying the forger for his birth certificate. Other series include "Jew Bankers that took us off the gold standard", "Joseph McCarthy walking on water", and a quite popular series: "The Affairs of Martin Luther King", featuring the civil rights leader in compromising vignettes with various heroines of the left. The Artists' early works focused on variations on an Elvis theme with airbrush on imitation velvet.
Don't forget a painting of beaten and bloodied George Zimmerman lying prone on the ground and reaching desperately for his gun as wild-eyed, diamond toothed, broken bottle wielding Trayvon Martin descends.
Come on. Do you realize that if Skittles are thrown really hard and one hits you in the eye you could go blind? No wonder the Block Watch captain felt threatened.
Shades of the old National Lampoon article about how those crafty Vietcong were plotting against us: "Uses stomach to get stabbed with", "Uses head to get shot with", etc.
They should have done a takeoff on Goya, "Obama Eating Our Constitution."
http://www.chinaoilpaintinggallery.com/oilpaintin…
That would require McNaughton to know something about art beyond what he learned from his Malen nach Zahlen kit.
Talk about getting hit over the head with a painting.
As I always ask when offered the opportunity to acquire 'fine art:'
Can it be acquired on velvet?
And what is pottage? Is that some measure of the potency of marijuana? Like wattage for electricity?
The answer sheet doesn't seem to cover this.
I don't know what pottage is, but it sure sounds French to me. Soup-eating slander-monkey, that McNaughton!
one t potage is french, 2 t pottage is bible talk.
Yeah, but those sneaky French have been infiltrating our language for 1,100 years or more.
You gotta keep your wits about you or they'll imply mind control and brainwash on you by controlling grammar, also too.
That would explain some of the nutty things grammar said to me over the years. Just the one on my mother's side tho.
McNaught-talent should be fined for selling that stuff as art.
And fined double for selling it as fine art.
If he were honest and billed it as "WWII-style political propaganda" (my fave!!) instead of some kinda "Profoundly Insightful Divinely-Inspired High Art", I'd be cool with it.
I didn't realize that finger painting in feces was a real art form.
Considering that most of his political stripe express their opinions by *throwing* feces, he's actually at the had of the class.
- re(ct)al –
Meh. The artist isn't that good. He forgot to add Obama's devil horns and red eyes.
Yeah, fershur. The guy doesn't even know that the touch of a sacred document would force Obama to reveal his true form.
Feh!
(He saves that for the Jews.)
He also forgot to make him look like Obama.
I can't tell whether that's the Constitution or a giant Saltine. (with apologies to Chris Rock).
One small step for Xerox, one giant leap for giclee. Silk screen for the Cheetos set.
Who the fuck would put one of his paintings on their wall? And how would you react if you were in someone's house with a McNaughton painting hanging up?
I'm divided between flee as fast as fucking possible or slowly back away without making any sudden moves.
You'd probably not even go into the house, being warned away by the fetus jars on the window sills and the confederate flags hanging on the doghouse.
Either would work just as long as you got out before they gave you a tour of their house which would include the basement with its half-dozen blood-stained freezers.
"You should probably stay out of the shed. I'm drying some…
things…
in there."
Remember to avoid eye contact.
That's why I refuse to canvas on behalf of Democratic candidates in Arizona. Somewhere else fine, Arizona no way.
I do like that he's burning it with just his mind and
Kenyan voodoomajick finger.That is what I was thinking! Could an angry Obama point at a McNaughton gallery, please?
Maybe he just wanted Obama to sing a little Billy Joel.
I clicked on that. But, thankfully, I stopped it before that fire got started.
Pshaw, where's the smoke? Any one who has burnt an ancient priceless document knows there is a lot of smoke: forgery.
Everybody knows the Constitution was printed on smokeless papyrus. Just a pinch between cheek and gum.
If McNaughton fields requests, I'd like one with dogs playing poker strapped to the top of Mitt's car.
"Arcs of projectile canine diarrhea rain over the rear of the Wagonmaster as the prototypical American Family motor along on a cherished family vacation." Jon McNaughton Painter of Plight…
I'd like to get one for Gail Collins.
WIN
But the title wouldn't be:" Dog on Mitt's Roof", would it?….I'm thinking "Freedom Takes a Holiday!!!"…
Of course, he isn't wearing his wedding ring either.
Its not very realistic. Where is the teleprompter?
I've seen better art in a Jack Chick publication.
What a maroon!
Come to think of it…have you ever seen Jack Chick in the same place as Jon McNaughten?
His Twitter profile says "If my paintings cause one to think and feel something…then it is successful."
Well, they cause me to think he is a reactionary loon. And they make me feel, well, it's kind of a mix of pity and bewilderment. So, bravo, good sir.
His paintings cause me to think and feel that the artist probably lost his virginity to a sock puppet, whereas his prose makes me think and feel that it's small wonder he's an artist.
Maybe I'm shamelessly flaunting my elitist bent but gee dammit, NOUN AGREEMENT ain't rocket surgery.
actually they don't make me feel anything other than this guy should not be using the term 'fine art'.
fawn art?…faux art?….fucked art?…
Yo, fuckbrains. Name one specific thing Obama has done that is against the Constitution.
…I'm waiting.
Authorized military detention without trial for US citizens. Although that's all I've got.
Psh, he's just copying Bush. No one likes a copycat.
OK, except NDAA explicitly didn't do that and the Hamdan ruling was handed down in 2006…
OK, except NDAA explicitly didn't do that and the Hamdan ruling was handed down in 2006…
But according to the folks screaming at me, it really says "kill Whitey". I would explain it, but I do not have a chalkboard and mental illness.
What has he done that is against the specific document that he's burning? According to Chief Justice Taney, lots of stuff. Against the new, improved version with the post-Civil War amendments? Not so much.
You mean post-War of Northern Aggression, thankyouverymuch.
It doesn't matter 'cause, THE PRESIDENT IS A NEGRO!!!!
But wait, he's only half a Negro. But then, up until they rescinded the law in 1982 (!), in Louisiana, you were legally a Negro if you were genetically 1/16 a Negro. So, let's see … math … Obama is actually a minimum of eight Negros! But then under the Constitution (King Newt UnRevised Version), the 8-Negro President is only 4.8 people, which still makes it crowded at times in the Oval Orifice.
NOTE: I did these mathematicular calcumalations without benefit of a single drop of alcohol. Also with benefit of math.
Math?…are you sure that's not spelled with an "e"?…
Well, he's CLANG!
And also, he CLANG!
And then, of course, there's CLANG!
He's blah, is what I mean.
For Jon McNaughton, black is more than a pigment of his imaginatiom. He uses it to whitewash his vision of America.
This painting: Skullfucking my peeping-holes.
did he learn to paint in North Korea?
Why is Robert DeNiro burning that tablecloth?
Oh thank you. That's it. Robert DeNiro and Robert Guillaume had a tablecloth burning baby and this guy painted it. I could not figure out WHO the I-talian I was seeing there was. I was all not Ray Liotta, who does this look like…you nailed it.
I wish Obama would have that look on his face whenever he addresses Congress or holds a press conference.
I wish Obama would buy this and hang it in the oval office.
I wish he'd point at them, and they'd ignite, like in this painting.
I just donated 50 Ameros to the Ignited Negro Collage Fund in your name.
"Collage"…Ha!…
If he so much as looked at them with that look on his face, they'd wet themselves and run away crying.*
*Except Boner, but only because he's already crying.
McNaughton is certainly crazy enough to be a great artist; if he had talent and intelligence he would be the real deal.
Yeah, and you can tell Obama is a real socialist because he HAS NO FLAG PIN. (Also, that doesn't really look Obama, who's much better looking than that.)
It's the guy from the Allstate commercial, but the ears are a little big
That's a mighty big Bible The Beast is burning!!
Ooo, Scary Anti-Christ Obama and Angry Mormon Jesus should totally have a stare-down!!
I note the 'artist' does not depict him wearing a bone in his nose and a headdress.
So, look who's compromising now.
I just don't get some of the pop surrealism stuff.
shouldn't barry be smiling?
Like this: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dA470EhFkaE/SgEEW_654kI…
"It's just a goddamned (flaming) piece of paper."
And Obama will claim that the kid set the fire! https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-7TuZtWy1aws/T2…
But did you have to put Mrs. Gingrich III in there?
Nothing makes sense there anyway, so why not?
And OUR NEW MOTHER!?!?!1?
Indeedy!
… I'll be in my bunk.
Did you make that? That's awesome!
Beautiful! Nice to see the Skittle flag (rip Trayvon)
That's a copy of the original constitution, right? The one that said it was A-OK that people with his skin color could be bought and sold as chattel, and even, through the 3/5 clause, gave disproportionate political power to the drivers of men? The one that (according to Chief Justice Taney) precluded people like Obama from even becoming citizens?
Well, no wonder he's burning the thing! The new one is way better.
That's precisely why William Lloyd Garrison, the great abolitionist, burned a copy of the US Constitution before the Civil War.
I now understand why the legal principle governing people who are so ga-ga they can't be held responsible for their actions is called the M'naughten rule.
Now Santorum burning the Constitution would be believable.
Women voting? What snobs!
There's a typo on the watermark at top right, it says "Fine Art" instead of "Shit on Canvas."
Or one of the rare cases when eliding words (for example Fine Arts becoming FArts) makes sense
Should have read, "Ein Fart".
Hmmm, going towards horrible 'socialism' for 100 years and it didn't become evident until we had a black President.
Here's a suggestion for McNaughton: paint the Edmund Pettus Bridge as it was on Sunday, March 7, 1965. That's an actual example of 'We the People' demanding the rights the Constitution is supposed to provide.
Oh, you libruls an yer facks.
Looks like it's about 3/5th's burned.
George W. Bush looks awfully tan in that painting.
Don't Re-Paintery
in 2012
Mmmmmmm, pottage.
*Homer drool*
Agggghhhh…
And thanks to the Tea Partiers, there are no firemen to put that out.
Well, yes there are. But you have to buy a subscription. Else you're SOL.
Hey, if Barry had just paid the 75 dollar fire department fee! Or is Michelle in charge of the family finances?
Needs moar crying Bald Eagle.
The first version of the painting had the crying Bald Eagle wiping a tear from its eye with a wing.
Its right wing or its left wing?
Also, this has to be on velvet. Tambien.
Somebody else used inflammatory propaganda "art" to portray the opposition as demonic creatures to be eliminated in the name of the fatherland.
Sorry, you guys, but it's no longer for sale:
Fappy Analversary!
Dude, you're a genius.
I don't know much about art, these colors do look awfully warm and rich.
I think McNaughton's work ranks up there with the finest paintings by Rafael, Michelangelo, Leonardo,or Donatello.
Of course, it's hard as heck to paint a decent work of art when you've got stubby little green arms and a giant hardback shell.
There is another way to look at this work of art.
Well, work of Jon.
Mr. Obama is holding the US Constitution left by President George Bush and his minions on January 20, 2008. And our President is not the least bit happy about it.
Now, myself I would have painted him in jungle camo BDU's with a Zippo lighter. Kids these days have no sense of history.
Not saggy pants, a doo-rag, big sneakers, and fourteen pounds of gold jewelry, using the burning Constitution to light a Kool and/or crack pipe?
Because that's *really* what this is about, right?
That Is what it is about, for sure. I can't sustain that level of Racist Fury, though so I'll leave to the experts.
No more illusory messes of pottage! Real messes of pottage for all!
Pottage for some! Miniature American Flags for others!
A mess of pottage in every… well, uh, pot…
NEEDZ MOAR HAPPY LITTLE TREES!
Don't worry everybody, I have it backed up on a floppy disk.
My favorites…the artist statements…Yeesh!
Heh. heh. Art.
I think this American Flag Performance Art installation is much more
Ironic.
Hip, also.
See what paint by numbers has led to!
Man, the cheapest type is the 210$ giclee on canvas. You can't get this one as a litho? Giclee on canvas is fucking tacky.
To me, it looks like Obama did not light the Constitution on fire, but is merely pointing out that it is on fire, which is a good thing to do.
Comeon libtards, McNaughton had to drive miles away from his gated community to find "urban brown" in oils.
Hey Pinche, a favorite Wonket moment of mine was when you Blingee'd this ass musket's other stupid painting. Hint, hint.
Looks like Obama is "Standing His Ground."
Once the price gets marked down to $200 ("special offer for *** members") this will be in my crazy aunt's living room.
Why don't these people just move to fucking Somalia if they hate government as much as they claim? The local Fed Ag office employs 3 men who never seem to do anything. To save money, the guv'ment want to close it all but 2 days a week so these idiot rural Republithugs might have to drive an extra 20 or 30 minutes to pick up their federal handouts. Needless to say, the local deficit hawks got their Carharts in twist and passed around petitions to keep the place open 5 days a week.
I hate conservatives and I really hate Republithugs.
I live in a rural part of a rural state, and I can think of no bigger Welfare Queens than farmers.
And these "public servants" will claim that the government does nothing for them.
"It was like that when I got here."
I don't think Obama started the fire. He picked up a copy of the Constitution, already on fire, and he just said: "Who the fuck started this shit?" You can tell he has this stern, pissed off looks about it.
Probably the greatest example of a talent used for evil purposes since Leroy Neiman.
Or at least, it would be, if there was any talent involved…
Colonel von Horst: [reporting on Nick's interrogation] They're still working on him. He won't break. We've tried everything! Do you want me to bring out the Leroy Nieman paintings?
General Streck, German High Command: No. We cannot risk violating the Geneva Convention!
Hey, here's another Obama one http://www.mcnaughtonart.com/artwork/wake_up_amer…
I hadn't seen it before. It's awesome. It's got lots of metaphors all over it. I love this guy.
"Those who are familiar with my work know I like to use symbolism and metaphor to engage the viewer."
Like a toddler who draws every house with one window and a smoking chimney?
Look, it's got chains! That's deep, man.
Also a chicken for some reason.
According to his helpful annotations, that's a rooster, because something, something Peter denied Jesus three times before the cock crowed something something.
I have to hand it to M'Naughton for this whole "hammer the metaphors home" thing. Primo idea. Van Gogh didn't have the internet and pointers, or otherwise he would have posted a .jpg of "Cornfield with Crows", and if you put the pointer over the road it would say "This road ends partway through the cornfield because it is life" and on the crows "I chose crows because they make people think of death. And also of that Poe guy who talks about death all the time."
The whole artistic experience would be way better with something like that.
Also I've always thought the duck rabbit picture would be better if somebody had drawn some tiny webbed feet and feathers, make it a bit clearer what it is.
It's only art if you have to explain the already painfully obvious allegorical meaning in your daubs.
As Mondrian said: "It's a load of fucking lines and colours and that, innit"
The chicken's the only one not in chains, besides the Prez. I think McNaughton is advocating free-range chickens, probably as one of the "six keys" (to free us from debt) symbolically hidden in the painting.
Why is Clint Dempsey holding that burning piece of paper?
Team USA Libel!
This looks shopped. I can tell from some of the pixels and from seeing quite a few shops in my time.
Pfft, it's just Article I. What has Congress ever done for us anyway?
I hate to pick nits here but on that watermark, shouldn't the Fine be in quotation marks? Or, perhaps the "Art".
Both?
"Canvas-based vomitarium"
That's good. there was a guy somewhere who made "Art" on a huge canvas on the floor by giving himself numerous colorful paint enemas.
We're in the same class here.
I don't know much about art, but I know what I don;'t like.
how many honest hard-earned ameros were spent on art by this american patriot?
history will never know. we can only thank them for their sacrifice.
OT, here's our chum etch-a-retch on the economic collapse:
"I keep hearing the president say he's responsible for keeping the country out of a Great Depression," Romney said at a town hall in Arbutus, Maryland. "No, no, no, that was President George W. Bush and [then-Treasury Secretary] Hank Paulson."
I forget, whose policies caused that horrendous economic skullfuck in the first place?
He's got more flip-flops than a Super Wings in Myrtle Beach.
R Butt Us, indeed.
Doesn't he know the true geniuses behind the Bush Economic Doctrine were Phil and Wendy Gramm?
It might be that guy who's image is Red-shifted from moving so rapidly down the Memory Hole. I think that his brother may have endorsed Our Wealthy Mr. Malprop, though, so it's not all forgotten.
Honestly, that blows my mind. He can not be serious. Even most Republicans don't honestly believe that shit.
Bill Clinton, of course.
That must be Clinton…who had good economy during his term because of Bush I.
Bill Clinton, ask any wingnut
his getting blowed under the desk also caused 9.11
My favorite thing: the watermark claiming that this is "fine art."
How else would you know?
I can't upfist this enough.
Anything that has a sign on it saying it is "fine art" is not. Sort of the same thing is the guy/girl you meet at the bar who says, in the first 10 minutes "I'm not crazy."
I'm sorry what was this thread about? I was distracted by Christina Hendricks in the little ad to the right. Was it something about a picture? art? can't remember the image? Oh, Hey, did you see the Van Gogh show in Philly? That one of rain in a field……
I don't have the Christina Hendricks ad :( Just the usual animal cruelty dreck.
PETA doesn't even have the poor taste to leave you guys tons of woman-objectifying softcore porn anymore. Those bastards.
Wow, for a moment I thought I was on Regretsy.
I feel like this painting is a metaphor for something, but it's just too vague.
Actually, the more accurate interpretation is that Obama is symbolically burning the hopes and dreams of Mitt Rmoney to become president. Well done, Obama.
No, he's burning his real super-long-form Kenyan birth certificate.
You can tell this was painted for teabaggers–even in their fantasy world, Obama has to helpfully point out the obvious.
Its funny, because it's true!
Coming soon to a pedo-van near you!
Screw the painting. How much for that impossible in three dimensions half round table it is hanging over on his web page.
It says in the upper right hand corner, "McNaughton Fine Art." It's a good thing this artwork is labelled, because I almost mistook it for a vulgar, fascist, hate-mongering cartoon. I guess "house painter" didn't work out as planned.
You know who else was a
OH FUCK TOO EASY
Thank God for your headline, because I was wondering why a young Robert Guillaume was descrating historic documents.
If the march towards Socialism has been happening for 100 years, can I order a painting with Saint Ronnie burning the Constitution? I'm guessing no…
Need laser eyes, maybe goo-goo eyes that seem to follow you around the room.
Please, Obama's black, the Constitution is on Hemp. Like he is going to torch that and not take a drag!
This cutting edge painting provides the ground floor to understanding the Language of Hyperspace which is the Original Language of the God-Mind consisting of Color, Tone, and Archetype. This image of Hyperspace is the interspecies and inter-universal language used by all beings..
When you are visiting with a new friend nothing says “get out of this house as fast as you can even if you have to squeeze out the cat flap” as a Jon McNaughton hanging in the foyer.
If I could get Dana Loesch to piss on the fire, the value of the print would triple overnight. Art investors take note. This can only increase in value.
"McNaughton has provided an actual Answer Sheet to explain the painting."
Because a painting of a scowling Obama, *burning the Constitution*, while *pointing* to the burning part ("See? It's burning!") isn't self-explanatory enough for…
his target audience…
and-uh…
OK, then.
I think the description was very helpful. It's like when the paper or the news station shows a picture of a cat when they have some kind of a story about a cat thing for people that not be familiar with what a cat looks like.
Hence your avatar.
That's very true. And also it's very thoughtful toward the people who don't know how to read, to let them know that it's a story about a cat.
To be fair, that Sheet goes perfectly with the Sheet he likes to wear with his friends on the weekends.
Why $345? what's magic about the 45?
If I did a painting that looked like this one I would NOT consider myself "good" as an artist. The clumsy style reminds me of every painting ever displayed in the annual Adult Continuing Education Art Show at the Town Library.
it's not good art, it's "fine" art
Guys, have you had a shitload of totally unobjectionable comments get deleted from this thread?
No, your highness, but is there any way you could reinstate my home IP address?
Didn't I do that already?
No, it's a pain in the ass for me as I have to run off my tether or work IP. Thanks for noticing though. I suppose I have been whining (hehe) about it, but maybe you will perfect your banhammer process.
Write a comment from your banned IP so I know which one to unblock.
Now try!
YES!
no?
Oh, I don't know how to answer this one.
Our p-ness is no longer the same size. :-(
it's not the size of the "p" ness, it's the amount of snark magic in it.
"Watch me pull a p-ness out of my ass!"
I don't mind. You give me something to shoot for.
Careful of the hair, please. I just got it back from the cleaners.
YES!
I had the most awesome, funniest comment in the history of the internets deleted!!???
*pitiful sob*
Could you put it back, dear commiegirl? (Whatever it was.)
~
What was deleted?
Oh I see them. There must be some tripwire buzzword thing!
What are those "tripwire buzzwords" – just wondering, for….ah… research!
No and all my Objectionable comments are still here. Just lucky, I guess?
unobjectionable in what regard Charlie?
yes. I'll take 5 p please.
BTW, I've noticed that comments I make that include a word that includes HE WHOSE NAME MUST NOT BE SPOKEN, like for instance the thingy on a gun that you'd have to squeeze to make the explosion that adds a few letters to HE WHOSE NAME MUST NOT BE SPOKEN, are auto-deleted.
And word to the wise, don't even try any workarounds.
Don't Mock Flipper!
~
I hope you weren't expecting straight answers.
Wow, I didn't even make an objectionable comment, for once.
Oh great, now I don't know if I have to go back and look for more comments that have been restored, or were they all restored between the time Newell found them and the time I got here to page 3. Do they still have Evelyn Wood speed-reading courses?
Again, word to the wise: Don't Whine.
McNaughton produces fine art; I produce fine whine.
Sometimes, when I'm having a really good day, I try to think up shit I could say that would get me banhammered from My Wonkette forever with no warning. A Wonkette Suicicide Fantasy, if you will. So if you come up with something really, really objectionable, for here, I'd love to here it, you know, for my files.
He's not wrong. We have become more socialist, because as a community we agree that there are some things we will not do. We will not see chlldren starve, veterans die in the streets, generations of uneducated children.
It is also true that the encroachment on our civil liberties and privacy and a host of other things is constant and we get it from all sides.
But, it's pretty damn stunty of him to use President Obama in this manner and incrediably infammatory and irresponsible and a very very disingenous and dishonest portrayal. President Obama is hardly the worst offender. All administrations and all legislative branches and all governments in all the lands since the beginning of time do this.
What this country really needs is a great Art Critic. Where's Jesse Helms when we need him?
racistdouchebag@Satanslair.urgh
deadracistscumbucket@Satanscesspool.hell
That image is very disturbing. I wish you’d have chosen something else. I realize that it’s a shameful part of American history that we should never forget, but it’s too much.
I'm glad he's got a fire going. I've got my illusory mess of pottage, and I'm thinking fondue style.
I am surprised he didn't paint him lighting it with a burning bible while standing on flag. McNaughton is clearly going soft.
And lazy. Where are the two dozen broadly allegorical figures of urban/intellectual/black/Jew/female Evil lined up behind him slapping him in the back while the two dozen broadly allegorical figures of Teabaggers/priests/boy scouts/bewigged former presidents kneel before him in abject horror?
Here's the kitten version: http://blingee.com/blingee/view/128562824-One-Nat…
Wingnut John McCaughton is the Thomas Kincaide of shitty rightwing propaganda. At least Kincaide doesn't "break it down" for cromagnons.
He's signing "Thank you, America" with his hidden hand.
That is en FUEGO!!1!
BT Fucking W, here is the OG Pinche at his best.
Ah, now I see why Obama is so mad. Somebody spilled his pint!
"Artist"? Blowjob artist, from what I hear.
I think you are being overly optimistic and assuming this cretin has a talent for anything.
Yer prolly right.
I might actually pay $345 for a nice painting of a blowjob.
However, here in Atlanta, in some neighborhoods, that would buy nearly 70 actual blowjobs. Hookers are people too, my friend…
Magical, wonderful people.
Yes….yes they are.
Obama had to burn the constitution after the right wingers had wiped their asses with it.
McNaughty,
This is one nation under money, and don't you fuckin' forget it. We were sold down the river by your extremist capitalist kind generations ago. You keep shilling for Mammon and see where your False Jesus finds you.
November can not come soon enough. I tell you, this ideology is working my very last nerve…
Wait, but doesn't the Constitution say we are a capitalist nation — and socialisms like the military-industial complex are bad? To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States (the wingnuts always seem to forget the "general Welfare" part).
OT: Welcome back (in full).
Fist bump.
♪ ♫ Our overlord is a forgiving overlord. ♪ ♫
They don't forget, they just think he's a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
Or those shifty ones like on the Felix the Cat clocks.
He's got the Spock ears and everything.
I'm finding this somewhat difficult to masturbate to.
Use Crisco – it's what works best for viewing "images" in, or from, Utah.
BTW, if the subject of your art has to be depicted pointing to what he is obviously doing, you suck at art? Pointing? Really, man? How gauche; how common. Where'd he got to art school? DeVry?
ART FAIL
Oil cartoonist.
Artistic sophistication is Elitist… and French and Gay!
Past Wonketteer "teh" has already shown us what One Nation Under God looks like when one wears the special "They Live" sunglasses… so I wonder how this new piece of reichwing tripe would appear? Any takers?
I've always wondered about that Shortpacked character. What a "one and done" genius.
Bammerz is replaced by a giant dollar sign.
Barry Pottage and the Illusory Mess
Why is Dallas Mavericks Point Guard Jason Kidd burning the Constitution?!
http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7010/6586255991_129…
He doesn't draw negroes very well. Not much experience with it in Utah, me thinks.
OT, but Limey Lizzie? Barb? Mommy Rebecca?
What are these, penis-cosyies?
Meat Garage Macramé?
Mr. McNaughton:
If you are perchance available for commissioned work, I would pay handsomely for an Obama hitting the Statue Of Liberty from behind.
Here's a video that Mitt Romney can masturbate to.
that was just awesome. oh man.
This is treason.
Teabaggers *wish* it was Potent enough or Important enough to rise to the level of Treason; however, it's just a different media-format of the same-ol' scrawled, illogical end-of-america-communist-UN-negros-are-coming-to-kill-us paranoid mutterings/leaflets of nutjob street-preachers.
This is the first in a series. In the paintings to follow, Obama will burn the Declaration of Independence, the Magna Carta, the Bible, and of course The Birth Certificate.
Can't wait until it's available as a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle. Those are great for whiling away the hours.
Here's some Great Patriotic Minds who just can't wait to start watering the tree of liberty! http://www.sodahead.com/united-states/one-nation-…
These are the same fucks who think Föx is soft on Communism. e.g.:
If there is an election! You forget that he has us under Martial Law right now, which postpones any and all elections indefinitely. Executive Orders do not get ratified by Congress; in fact Congress has no say one way or the other. So technically he has already bypassed the elective process. Be warned, America, we are seeing the beginning of the Communist reign of terror. Make no mistake about it.
Stay armed and ready… Lets hope our Military and Police forces love the free America more than taken orders form a dictator/ Marxist!!!!
there are UN troops stationed throughout the US and they will be the ones as well as his "civilian army".
Awshit, Doc..they're onto us! Now we'll have to move up the timeline. Those camps are nowhere near ready – not all of the Immobilization and Reeducation Theaters have fully tested brainwave generators. Ah, well, you go to war with the camps you have, not the ones you wish you have…
I'm especially intimidated by the fellow with a Kristen Stewart avatar.
"Don't push me, bro! Or else I'll breathe really heavily and cry for my boyfriend!!"
McNaughton is to fine art what Mallard Fillmore is to comics.
Barry didn't burn it. He is holding it while yelling:
"Look bastards, THIS is what happened when you elected a Texas village idiot as president you chump."
I just remembered that I know a 94 year-old Faux-watcher who passes her time with paint-by-numbers things that she then proudly displays to guests…. she'd lurve THIS piece o' crap! Does McNaughton sell paint-by-number sets, or is that too challenging and sophisticated for his intended audience?
"Too elitist."
Oh, like he's EVER used a dictionary.
Shame on you Sasha and Malia!
You know Who Else was pictured arrogantly burning American documents?
OT: The Hoodie Granholm
Jeeze, I miss her.
One Nation Under Socialism, which you can purchase for a mere $345
Irony is dead.
That's just Day 1 of Constitution Law 101 at Univ. of Chicago Law School. By the end of the semester there is flag burning, sharia-compliant lesson plans and mandatory student participation in Hezbollah rallies.
Looked at this piece of shit again: Is he really saying: "Who's the N*****r now, white boy?….'cause it looks like it…
What I like best about this artist is his subtlety. Really makes the viewer think, you know?
Thank God its still just burning the boring parts down the bottom. Quick, put it out before it gets to 'promote the general welfare'!
Remember the make-believe art schools that used to advertise on match book covers "If you can draw this this you can become an artist!"
If he really wanted to make Obama look threatening, he should have put him in a hoodie.
I didn't know Obama had a laser finger.
Waiting patiently for Elvis At The Last Supper on black velvet
I think I see what's going on here. Bush decided to prank Obama, fashioned a sack out of the Constitution, filled it with Bo dung, and lit it on fire on the White House doorstep. Obama is all scowly as he hears Bush's muffled giggles off in the dark.
I take it as: "Really? Really? You fuckshits set the constitution on fire with the Patriot Act and now you want me to stand here and put it out while blaming me for setting it on fire in the first place?! And I'M the asshole…"
Sure, it's art. But it's no Mallard Fillmore.
President B. H. Obama DID NOT START THAT FIRE. He is simply being presidential in solemnly showing that indeed, the document he holds (which I think is only the Preamble) is aflame, and WILL SOMEONE NOT HELP HIM before his fingers are fried? Somebody, please, HELP HIM!
But it’s not really that big a deal. After all, Moses busted up the 10 Commandments. From God hisself. We can get another copy, people.
Did ya notice Rick's holdin' that bible the same way Nobama's holdin' the burning constiturion in the McNaughty fin art? Burn, bible, burn!
Wait, I know there's Wonketteers who don't drink, they probably have monies.
We spend it on hookers instead.
Or so I've heard.
Nope, sorry….and I barfed on my last hooker (in lieu of payment), so I'm kind of down to the streetwalker type, the type Livingrock or whatever his name was, warned us about…
And coke, no pepsi.
It's all true because, RELIJUS FREEDUMB. It's in the Constitushun. The Man in the Brown Suit said so on Teevee, so it must be true. I just wrote him a nice check out of Junior's College money.
I'm in, I'm more excited than a teabagger at a Palin rally.
BTW, would you like a 4-5 sentence recap of what went down that night, or let's let bygones be bygones?
Either way, you the man!
The snark of the moral universe is long, but it bans toward justice.
(Welcome back, home slice!)
In tonight's anal wink blot I see Jim Newell as a muscular Jesus welcoming his flock home.
Bull.
That is sooo great. I'm lovin' this entire thread.
Watch me pull a "p" ness out of my asshat.
Tentacle Porn!
O, excellent!
He does style himself as "the painter of light."
And Stephen Colbert observing it all in the mirror behind him.
And flaccid.
And ineffectual.
And drippy.
Dood, somebody had to.
Besides, you just about dumped the delicious Sara for our delightfully hot and sexxxay Editrix.
And those are just the visible scars…
Comments on this entry are closed.