Voters Simply Don’t Care For Callista Gingrich, Who Is Not Running For Anything

  today in pollery

Callista, flanked by The SpeakerWhy do pollsters do polls about candidates’ spouses? They just sort of stand there, on the trail, smiling, and then if the candidate wins they may launch some benign PR initiative, like recommending good nutrition and exercise for children. In other words, they poll candidates’ spouses because they’re extremely important figures who could end up indoctrinating our children! And Callista “Cally” Gingrich, according to the latest PPP poll, has an 18% favorability rating. It seems there’s quite a bit of jealousy out there among the 82% of American voters who haven’t had the pleasure of marrying Newt Gingrich yet.

Republican first lady candidates Karen Santorum and Ann Romney are still relatively unknown, but at least they manage to keep a positive net favorability rating despite being married to horribly unfavorable human-dildo husbands:

-Michelle Obama has a 54/34 favorability rating, compared to her husband’s 48/48 approval.

-Ann Romney has a 31/22 favorability rating, compared to her husband’s 33/58.

-Karen Santorum has a 31/27 favorability rating, compared to her husband’s 36/53.

ON THE OTHER HAND:

-Callista Gingrich is actually pretty unpopular, with an 18/44 favorability rating. But it’s at least better than her husband’s 28/61.

When will Robert De Niro apologize for conducting this poll?

[PPP]

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Jim Newell is Wonkette's beloved Capitol Hill Typing Demon. He joined Wonkette.com in 2007, left for some other dumb job in 2010, and proudly returned in 2012 as our "Senior Editor at Large." He lives in Washington and also writes for things such as The Guardian, the Manchester paper of liberals.

View all articles by Jim Newell

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111 comments

  1. Barb

    When asked what she was giving up for Lent she replied, "my opinion" Seriously. I think she should have answered, "all hopes of being the FLOTUS"

    1. Terry

      Remember that Newtie fell for her because he felt she could make him President. I'd say that after Newtie's embarassed in Tampa that Callista may join the growing ranks of ex-Mrs Gingrich's. On the other hand, Callista doesn't have a potentially debilitating illness so he may let her skate a while longer.

      1. DaRooster

        I would gain mass respect for her if she left him. Even though she is a mannequin she is too good for him.

        1. sullivanst

          Is there a woman on the planet who isn't too good for Newt Gingrich? My mind's blank…

          1. sullivanst

            Definitely a candidate, although it's not a clearcut case and I for one don't want to think about either one of them at all, let alone for however long it'd take to work out which is the more despicable.

    2. Lascauxcaveman

      Her profile in the New Yorker a couple of months ago has all the depressing details. She was kind of a dowdy chubby as teen and young adult, not too popular, not many friends, got involved in campaigns for local conservatives, ended up working in the notorious Newts office, hooked up with him despite all the polite cautions from friends and loved ones.

      Basically a decent and smart kid from the from the middle class making a last desperate grab at fame and power, despite being fully aware of the cost.

    1. rickmaci

      Bhaaaaahaaaaahaaaaaahaaaaaaa. Funniest post here. I nominate you for a Wonkie for Best Post about a Candidate Spouse in 2012.

  2. Mahousu

    Callista's going to be sooo mad. America will have to buy her some jewelry to make up for it. And none of that cubic zirconia crap, either.

  3. SorosBot

    But who doesn't want an animated real doll with a face carved to look like a bird's, a plastic helmet for hair, and a botox-induced permanent Joker grin?

    1. comrad_darkness

      Um, doesn't that describe all the fox news talking heads? Especially if you add in "blond"

  4. memzilla

    So much for the "Cally Helmet" hairstyle sweeping the nation… which looks like you could slice cheese and carrots on the sharp edges of it.

    1. BaldarTFlagass

      How much would you pay for this handy kitchen tool? Don't answer yet, because there's MORE!

  5. DaRooster

    "…if the candidate wins they may launch some benign PR initiative, like recommending good nutrition and exercise for children."

    Only the good ones… how dare she.

  6. ph7

    Why do pollsters do polls about candidates’ spouses? They Callista just sort of stand lies there, on the trail bed, smiling enduring .

    Fixed.

  7. tcaalaw

    Maybe Callista could use Newt's interest-free Tiffany credit line to buy some nice trinkets for random members of the American public to get those poll numbers up?

    1. prommie

      I was thinking she could be played by that marionette, the one named "Madame"? Whateever happened to that act?

  8. BaldarTFlagass

    I might take her home, if I was shit-faced drunk and it was closing time and I was horny as a three-balled tomcat, but when I woke up the next morning and she was asleep on my arm, I would chew it off so I could leave without waking her. And then I'd chew off the other arm, because I'd know she was out there looking for a one-armed man. And then I would stop drinking. I mean, I would really stop drinking.

    1. Texan_Bulldog

      Those are called coyote dates in TX. Swear to Allah–where you'd rather chew off your arm than wake her/him up.

    2. Man0nTheStreet

      "And then I would stop drinking. I mean, I would really stop drinking."

      Riiiiiiiight… that what you said the last time this happened!

    3. Negropolis

      That. Was. Hilarious. I like the way you think, and I'd like to subscribe to your (insane) newsletter…

  9. Sassomatic

    I'm thinking it's time Newt starts looking around for a replacement. This would make a fantastic Fox reality gameshow.

    Who Wants to Marry the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man?

  10. MissTaken

    Has anyone told her she has more of a chance of achieving an orgasm with Newt than of ever becoming FLOTUS?

    1. SorosBot

      Maybe she spontaneously orgasms every time she gets a Tiffany's diamond? Otherwise yeah; you know that right wing assholes will never go down on a woman.

  11. Goonemeritus

    I don’t think it’s any American’s business to approve or disapprove of her long standing adulterous behavior.

  12. Baconzgood

    I find it hard to snark on this woman. I really really want to but she's just so "Meh".

  13. Tilley

    FLOTUSes manquées are people too, my friend. Well okay, perhaps not this particular bunch.

  14. BaldarTFlagass

    "-Callista Gingrich is actually pretty unpopular, with an 18/44 favorability rating."

    Homewreckers are never very popular.

  15. Mumbletypeg

    "When will Robert De Niro apologize for conducting this poll?"

    Soon as Newt apologizes for his conductunbecoming — that, or when Callista's chill factor drops enough to thaw her aura so she can photosynthesize.

  16. MissTaken

    Callista as FLOTUS will be fun! She can give all the White House interns lessons on how to turn your nasty affair with your fat fuck of a boss into a marriage! She can go on the Today* show and talk about how many cans of hairspray it takes to get her hair just right each morning! It will be FANTASTIC!

    *But not the Hoda and Kathie Lee version of Today because they are fun and drunk.

    1. chicken_thief

      "…how many cans of hairspray it takes to get her hair just right …"

      Maybe when Newt kicks her to the curb, John Edwards can move in on the action. Then he and Callista can sit around all day and do their hair together.

  17. Lionel[redacted]Esq

    I'm sure, somewhere deep in the bowels of the Gingrich campaign, polling is already starting to find the fourth Mrs. Gingrich. They won't let this get in the way of their victory!

  18. VespulaMaculata

    This needn't be a drawback: if anybody can exchange wives before the convention, it's Newt.

  19. prommie

    This is just genius. For me, because I am slow, it was a "3 second" joke, it took me a few beats, and then I saw the perfection of it.

  20. elburritodeluxe

    For "fun", add up the totals and you get:
    Michelle Obama with 12% (!) having no opinion;
    Ann Romney with 47%;
    Karen Santorum with 42%; and
    Callista at 38%.

  21. chicken_thief

    So I guess the moral is: if you are the wife of a Republican candidate for POTUS and you want to be popular with the fine citizens of the US, you either need to help your husband strap a dog to the roof of your car or sleep with a dead baby. Just standing there with a glassy eyed stare don't cut it.

  22. GemlikeFlame

    This is woman who is apparently willing to be intimate with the warm, wonderful human being that is Newt Gingrich.

    I think that says everything that needs to be said.

  23. Man0nTheStreet

    The GOoPer base isn't into Callista, eh? Well, fortunately, ol' fat Newter has what – 3 months before the Convention to dump #3 Wife and marry #4, even if he has to swap religions again.

  24. Veritas78

    "…among the 82% of American voters who haven’t had the pleasure of marrying Newt Gingrich yet."

    Ouch. I guess Jim's really back.

  25. labman57

    Callista overheard constituents complaining to her husband about the unethical conduct of mortgage lenders that led to millions of families going into foreclosure, losing their homes and wrecking their lives.

    “Home-wrecking?”, she piped up. “What’s wrong with that?”

  26. chascates

    Hard to reconcile that 'church choir singer' stalwart Catholic with 'committing adultery for 8 years with married boss' aspect.

  27. ttommyunger

    The elephant has lots of company: everyone but Newt is flaccid around the "C" Lady. Oh, right; it stands for Calista.

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