My my, Rick Santorum sure is getting a lot of press around the old Wonkette HQ (Los Angeleez) today. WHY WILL NOBODY ELSE DO ANYTHING STUPID? Anyway what’s the latest and hopefully last forever sweet Jesus amen news from the Smegmataed One? Oh he just cold snapped on Dan Savage, the happily married and bechildrened sex educator and univerally loved Seattle writer and editor, yo!
First came a whole bunch of pout-pout-whine about how Catholics probably don’t even know he’s Catholic and that’s why he’s losing them horrifically (and not because hardly any Catholics are actually Opus Dei SantorumBack freaks), and then a bunch of Bible-based begats about Jesus wanting us to nuke Iran, and then this:
RealClearReligion: If you happen to run into Dan Savage, what would you say to him?
Rick Santorum: I would tell him that I’m praying for him. He obviously has some serious issues. You look at someone like that who can say and do the things that he’s doing and you just pray for him and hopefully he can find peace.
Jeez, Rick Santorum, what’d Dan Savage ever do to you? [RealClearReligion]
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http://www.spreadingsantorum.com.
For the children.
On the contrary: santorum is a proven contraceptive.
I think you mean Santorum, although santorum would work, too.
What's the difference, you say? Well, one is a filthy stain with a stench that snorting bleach will not remove, and the other is the product of anal sex.
clickied on the linky just to help keep it at top of the Google…you're welcum! :)
Rick Santorum is the new Sarah Palin.
Well, the term "palinating" was created to describe the technique of using your imagined status as a victim as if it were a weapon ("Josh, quit palinating about how your teacher hates you and do your homework!" ). Like santorum itself, "santorumniating" just doesn't flow easily off the tongue.
So who is the old Sarah Palin now? Aside from the Queen of the Grifters, I mean.
Ricky, I bet Dan has more "peace" than you. Hater!
Can we just pray away the gay basher.
If prayers were really answer, he'd be gone already. (JW looks up, with his "?" face.)
Thanks for reminding me to google santorum
Rick Santorum is saying the kids that go to college are snobs. Rick Santorum has a new program for children. It's called "Every Child Left Behind".
Is he going to Home College his kids?
Hey, someone has to be left to serve the rest of us our fries.
I thought it was "Every Priest In A Child's Behind."
No Child's Behind Left Alone
Haha! LL Cool J reference. RS wins!
Do you know who else Santorum prayed for?
The stork?
Hitler?
Hey! Just because I'M not there to say it doesn't mean you can steal my line! (OK, not without attribution, anyway.)
Heil Frothy!!1!
Are you back, or just a quick check in?
Either way, you were missed.
Marcus Bachmann?
His rent boy?
His IVF doctor so he doesn't actually need to bang his wife?
Who's the sperm donor?
The IVF doctor.
Naaaww, he would have gone to college.
Dan Savage? BUWHA HA HA HA!
HAHAHAHA! Oh, yes!
Do you know who else Santorum preyed upon?
Old white racist Christians who are all afraided by the scary brown Muslim Socialist President?
Himself.
Palin's less dangerous.
Prolly dumber too…also.
Yes, but never underestimate the viciousness of an adult mean girl who feels simultaneously entitled & spurned. Shudder…
So, are you referring to Palin or Santorum?
all of 'em, Katie?
Among the super-religious Catholics, "I'm going to pray for him" is code for "Fuck him'. So fuck Rick Santorum.
I'm going to skull-pray-for-him
I'm going to pray for his anus. I'm going to pray HARD!
As an atheist I'm happy to say "I'm going to pray for him" too.
Well, bless his heart.
Beat me to it. Fuck you very much.
I'll pray for you.
It's also the equivalent of the Southern "Bless his heart."
Oh, he'll find a piece alright.
Oh for fuck's sake!
Apparently Rick Santorum didn't learn his lesson the last time he fucked with Dan Savage.
http://spreadingsantorum.com/
What did Dan Savage ever do to Ricky? Well, its obvious isn't it…he's a GHEY!!!!
He obviously has some serious issues.
Because Santorum comparing the way Dan Savage lives his life to bestiality is Dan Savage's issue. Yup, that sounds about right.
But, don't you see, Savage was so mean and vicious and nasty to a poor decent man who was simply standing up for what he believes in. Remember, Rick Santorum is the injured party, not the whole class of people who were equated to dogfuckers.
And baby-rapers. Don't forget that he equated homosexuality to pedophilia as well as bestiality.
Well, yeah, but that hardly distinguished him from the other dime-a-dozen hatemeisters. But "man-on-dog," that's a level of douchebaggery that Rick Santorum OWNS.
Hey Rick, maybe we should talk about your many "issues"….let's start with those sweater vests…
Those poor kids. Does no one think of the children anymore??
I did what I could.
Well the priests in Santorum's Catholic Church and his friend Jerry Sandusky certainly do.
May I say, in response, ew.
Every time Rick prays, God Googles "Santorum" a thousand times.
Dear Rick,
Please don't pray for me either. Thanks.
Sincerely, Antispandex
Alt-text: "Folks, I ate so many beans for the Puerto Rico primary, you wouldn't believe it. I just flew back here. And I didn't take a plane."
Is that why everybody else in the room is passed out?
Another gay Santorum can't pray away?
The guy really is a slow learner, ain't he?
Santorum to captain of Titanic: "Gee, I sure hope we hit another iceberg".
If Santorum somehow manages to get elected, they're going to have to seriously modify the doors on Air Force One to accommodate that huge fucking cross he bears.
In Ricky's world,
Ghey = mount dog.
Little Ricky = Mount Calvary.
"If Santorum somehow 'miraculously' manages to get elected" / fixed (and I ain't helpin')
Santorum: Soooooo GGG!
Rick's just mad that someone beat him at his own game for so long. If the Santorum website hadn't ranked so high in Google search results, Rick wouldn't have given a flying fuck about Dan Savage.
Pray away the ghey.
Who let Rick into that blah church?
His Heavenly Blahther.
I was tempted to assume it was photo-shopped – except all the kids in that picture look knocked out with exhaustion and boredom – so Ricky really must have been there.
Sadly, blahvangelist churches are prime territory for gay-bashing politicians.
Isn't it time that the two of them just kiss and make up?
If they do it with government funding, do they have to provide us with the free video?
Betcha munniez teh Repuglycan'ts scream "NOOOO!" in unison. In public, anyway. They'd be the first to download it in private.
Ew, excuse me, Dan Savage is a good-looking dood with a hella handsome husband! Why on earth would he want to (ew, ew, ew) kiss Santorum?
Of course, as much as Rick talks about Dan Savage alla time, you just know he's fantasizing on Dan's gorgeous ENORMOUS cock, all turgid and … brb.
"Quit worrying about Santorum. He has as much chance of becoming president as I do." G.W.Bush
Actually, under the Constitution, G. W. Bush can become President again – he was only elected once.
I'd pray for Rick Santorum to quit being stupid, but I don't believe in miracles.
Some people say that Dan is Michael Savage's younger brother.
Michael is a Weiner, Dan is a man, not even the same species.
Anthony was a Weiner and, when he took on the right wing nutz, over-priced gold sellers, et. al., a Winner.
Michael is just a Dick.
And some say he's The Stig.
Actually, no. No one could conceivably say that.
Jeesh Rebecca youre gonna wear them pretty lil fingers down with your non stop posts. Keep up the good work though. Me love'n it
Rickie you're pushing it here. This is a fellow recovered Catholic, Illini & Seattlite for whom you are praying. How's about you Google this? Yeppers, the Seattle Stranger, where Savage works as Editorial Grande Poobah, endorsed your frothy ass. What more do you want???
"I'm praying for you"
"Bless your heart"
"Now isn't that special?"
Huge thumbsup.
Proof, if proof were needed, that context is everything.
Santorum is so homophobic, his kids are taught in homeschool science class that humans are "hetero sapiens."
He's so homophobic, he refuses to buy homogenized milk.
But when his Uncle Moe asked him who his favorite singer was, he said, "Don Ho, Moe."
He pretends his favorite Stooge is Larry, because he can't admit that it's Moe.
Somehow I doubt that anything in the Santorum home school experience has any relationship to "sapiens".
My friends made a band called "The Internet" that had a song titled "Hetero Sapien". Sample Lyric: "Hetero Sapien, Don't know where to stick it in"
I would tell him that I’m praying for him. He obviously has some serious issues. You look at someone like that who can say and do the things that he’s doing and you just pray for him and hopefully he can find peace.
Yes, I know that was my reaction when Santorum made that man on dog comment…
It's a lot of projection. The only issue Dan Savage has is that fuckheads like Rick Santorum think that he shouldn't be entitled to full legal rights just because of his sexual orientation, and even that states should be allowed to imprison him for it. People should be pissed at evil bigots like Rick for that.
You know, I also hoped Rick Santorum would be at rest, having finally found lasting … even permanent … peace.
Dare I suggest… eternal peace?
Pray / furtively masturbate to, same difference.
You know it (fap, fap, fap, fap, fap).
I come from Catholics, and don't mind pointing out that "I'm praying for him" has almost the same meaning as "Bless his little heart" does in the South.
Blah blah white sheep
have you any soul
Yes sir yes sir
three shitbags full
Well the right-wing has always been a staunch defender of the "right" to bully.
I love it that the guy who brought his fetus home for the kids to paw at is telling Dan Savage he's an awful person because Dan is mad at him and says gross things about him for repeatedly denigrating and trying to legislate away an entire group of actual human beings that Dan is a part of.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I know which side of "He's got issues" anyone I know and love is going to come down on on that one, Ricky.
God, why can't Dan Savage be more like a Duggar?
Santorum says he, "would tell him that I’m praying for him,"…
but is he REALLY praying for him?
If so, and then this divinity smotes Savage for being gay,
wouldn't it then be Santorum's fault?
Hm. Makes me wonder if there's gonna be major twister activity in certain parts of Washington state sometime soon.
Only if Rick Santorum is campaigning there. His god don't seem to like him all that much.
well. if god is going to smite anyone, one would hope it would be santorum for whining, and for bugging him so much about the ways he works his wonders to perform.
and for those sweater vests.
I'm praying for him? Worst pickup line ever.
I try to imagine how that prayer goes. "Hey God, it's Rick. Look, I know you need me to tell you what to do too, so I'm just gonna throw one out there for Dan's soul, maybe he'll change? I mean, I believe you are the one who says he's going to the hell you created for people who dig people of the same sex? But since you're the boss of who goes to hell, fix him? Or don't cause you made everything? Except gay people?"
See, this is why I am terrible at praying. But I like Dan Savage. So, thanks for Dan just like he is, God. But God knew that.
Jebus loves the sinner, hates the ASSHOLE!
So, you're saying Jebus loves Dan Savage and hates Rick Santorum? OK. I'm good wit' dat.
"God Hates Assholes"
Gotta put that up on a sign, just in case the Westboro fuckwits show up in town.
Dan Savage has 99 problems and Rick Santorum is one.
Actually, Rick Santorum has 99 problems and Dan Savage is one.
Oh, Rick has MORE than 99 problems, I'm sure.
Rick always struck me as being more of a No. 2.
Other way around.
He obviously has some serious issues.
…says the man who gets down on his knees before his angry, invisible daddy and begs him to not let monsters shove iron porcupines up his ass forever.
"he just cold snapped on Dan Savage"
*sits back* *grabs popcorn*
Of all the many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many times the wingnuts have forgotten history and then tried to rewrite it, this one has GOT to be the most entertaining.
That's A LOT of sleeping blah people.
Well, duuuuuh – lazy, shiftless, what did you expect?
the photo is priceless… none of the kids is paying attention to Frothy. Two of them are texting, one is cleaning his ears and the other just fall asleep straightly
The little dude on the bottom far right is obviously thinking, "I'm probably gonna get in trouble for falling asleep in church, but I just… can't… zzzzz…"
He certainly seems ill-suited to run for high public office. I think he's already done "holding office" experiment.
"I have no intention and no desire to be the pastor of this country," he told a group of Texas pastors.
Of course not. The Catholic clergy are pederasts, not pastors.
RealClearReligion: If you happen to run into Dan Savage, what would you say to him?
Rick Santorum: I would tell him to slap me on the ass and ride me like a pony.
Dan has better taste than a schmuck like Ricky and besides which he's married and off the market.
So what? I'm sure Ricky would like Dan to adopt Christian Family Values™ and what's more Christian Family Values™ these days than cheating on one's spouse?
Dan's actually in an open marriage, though Santorum shouldn't get his hopes up. The slope's not that slippery.
"You look at someone like that who can say and do the things that he’s doing and you just pray for him and hopefully he can find peace."
I bet Dan Savage is more at peace than you will ever be, Ricky, m'boy. You truly deserve being know as santorum, though, even that might be too good for you.
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That photo looks like Rick just let loose one nasty fart.
I pray for those "blah people" behind Santorum to eventually get some self-respect.
I am amazed that there are enough fked- up people in this country to keep this POS in the race.
It's the "anti-RMONEY" vote. They'd vote for a piece of wood if it was running against RMONEY.
Unless it was ebony, amirite?
Oh, hell to the yeah.
Smegmataed One
I can't begin to tell you how much I love that title. It's a thing of beauty.
He Rick, there's a job available in a big glass church out in Anaheim, CA.
"You look at someone like that who can say and do the things that he's doing and you just pray for him and hopefully he can find peace."
You just pray because you have no argument against someone whose taken your public derrogation for 25 years and spit it ( a' la Google) back in your face for the whole planet to see. Yeah, not much left to do but pray.
Ricky is making me feel bored. I want him to come out of the closet already.
Heh, heh, you said "come", heh ,heh…..
It looks like Ricky is preaching to the choir, and they're falling asleep.
Rick, the only way you can help Dan Savage "find peace" is to retire from public life, forever.
When I think peace, I think Rick Santorum. Rick Santorum will be your Secretary of Peace in the coming (heh) Paul/Kucinich administration.
Those kids are wearing pink. Of course they don't care about his anti-gay agenda.
He makes it sound like Dan Savage has done something to personally hurt him, like claim consistently and in front of crowds that he has no right to marry and raise children.
You can stop praying now, Ricky, Dan Savage has found peace. In addition to being worlds hotter than you, he's learned that laughing his butt off at self-righteous, self-aggrandizing self-destructing politicians does wonders for one's disposition and frame of mind.
"Santorum."*Tee-hee!*
You know, I'd tell Rick he can take those prayers and shove 'em up his ass…but I fear he'd actually enjoy that.
Dan Savage is a decent, if opinionated, human being. Santorum does not qualify for inclusion in humanity. Why does the universe not rid us of this turbulent priest-wannabee?
Rick, here's a hint. Many of us have studied for longer than you've been alive about the things you babble on about, and trust me, you have no clue. So. shut up. OK?
No harm done, Dan can use the prayer and Li'l Ricky can use the practice.
Dan Savage is Michael Savage's brother from another brother.
Is it me, or does it look like Rick just farted on all the parishioners?
Except when they are bullies.
Personal responsibility.
whut, you already forgot my brotha frum anotha mutha the Herminator? nigga pleaz
"Bully" is the new "victim."
Remember, this is a political culture where attempts to stop bullying of gays is an infringement on parents' rights, and where Christians are a persecuted minority.
… and FOX News is fair and balanced.
I see everything twice!
I was able to upfist it twice!
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