It’s a good thing Rick Santorum is so very concerned with our First Amendment right to freedom of religion. He says so every day! Which is why it might come as a surprise to some (it will not come as a surprise to anyone) that maybe Rick Santorum only believes in First Amendment rights for Christians and not any of those godless Buddhists, Mooslims, Mohommedans, or Other? The heathen infidel lesbian witches at RightWingWatch bring you this not at all terrifying video of some heehaw preacher screamin’ and a-shriekin’ at all us to git out his cuntry before laying his hands on the smiling, smegma-slicked puss of Mr. Senator Rick Santorum.
Here is the touching benediction.





{ 217 comments }
I can haz Christian forgiveness? Nooo, you be stealin my Christian forgiveness!
Apparently Christian forgiveness is only for other Christians. The rest of you can fuck off.
More "compassionate conservative" churches should have this etched into their entry archways. It's like that saying about abandoning, uh, something or other when you enter. It's on the tip of my tongue.
Ceiling Cat is watching you humiliate yourselves.
But atheists are OK, right?
Those scornful bastards will be the first against the wall.
I assume you're talking about the wall of separate between church and state. The one with surveyor's marks on it, right?
I don't think he realizes they exist, honestly. Which is a relief.
They already bin killing 'em out in TexASS.
Jesus fucking Christ…
Jesus just face palmed.
hey now, watch yo mouth!
What about teh Juice?
Orange or grapefruit?
Tomato!
I coulda had a V-hate!
Where V=Vagina, of course.
"It is interesting at great political rallies how you have a Protestant to pray and a Catholic to pray, and then you have a Jew to pray. With all due respect to those dear people, my friend, God Almighty does not hear the prayer of a Jew. For how in the world can God hear the prayer of a man who says that Jesus Christ is not the true Messiah? It is blasphemy."–Bailey Smith, president, Southern Baptist Convention, Aug. 22, 1980.
"If you don't love America, you don't like the way we do things, I got one thing to say: GET OUT!"
Yes, preacher, please do GTFO…
Love means never having to say you're a sorry, misinformed sack o' paranoia.
Does that mean we get to keep the gays?
God called, he wants his son back.
"I got nailed on a piece of wood for this stupid shit?"
–Jesus Sonofgod.
The "One God" of your religion is named Yahweh, you little cretin.
Yahweh or the highway?
Yahway, not Blahway!
We don't need Yahweh-ing in on this Fare.
I thought it is Jehovah … wait, don't stone me !
Slight correction:
"You're either for me, or you're not a Nazi."
– Rick Santorum
There is only one second baseman for the San Diego Padres and his name is JESUS (Guzman).
At least once a week I buy lunch from Jesus. He has lovely brown lashes.
"We don't worship Buddha."
Neither do Buddhists, dumbass.
Never trust a man with two first names.
Chris Christie?
Trust Christie? – fat chance.
Hey wait….Oh that's right no one does trust me. And for excellent reasons.
Rick Perry, Rick Scott, Scott Walker, Walker Texas Ranger …
They hate Buddhists now too? Fucking Buddhists?!
With all their self-awareness and shit? Fuck yeah! USA! USA! USA!
And compassion, acceptance and lack of materialism. We can't have that!
And here I was thinkin' the biggest threat to America was all that turban-wearin' Sharia Muslim stuff.
Seriously! I mean, c'mon!! Who hates Buddhists?!?
These are the same people that hate Sikhs. And they hate them only because they think that is what an Arab should look like.
"…these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know… morons."
Me, but only the ones at the San Francisco Airport.
Sri Lankan Tamils (Hindus and Catholics, mainly) being oppressed by the mainly Buddhist Sinhalese majority. Or those people who remember that the major Zen orders in Japan were totally alongside their WW2 military dictatorship. Or the Tibetan serfs under the old lamaist theocracy.
Westerners seem to have this idea that Buddhism is some kind of cuddly "not-really-a-religion", whereas just like every other religion, it can be used for good and assholish purposes.
All good examlpes but do you think Dennis Terry is actually aware of any of that? I knew there had to be some group of people somewhere but I doubt Pastor Denny is taking a principled stand on they're behalf.
Don't forget people murdered/enslaved by the junta in Burma/Myanmar/whatever the fuck they call it these days.
Maya Arulpragasam?
Easy for YOU to say.
MIA libel!
In Dennis Terry's defense, Richard Gere is a Buddhist.
Ah, there you have it.
hey, me and the Buddha are just brothas from anotha mutha http://www.beliefnet.com/Faiths/Buddhism/2000/02/…
(wait for it…….)
I find this difficult to masterbate to.
Do these ass muskets still believe in the trinity? Or is it a two for one deal now?Holy Ghost, batman.
It's a Buy Two Deities, Get One Free sale. A clever little marketing move designed to undercut the profits of other monotheistic religions and eventually corner the market and establish a monopoly.
It sounds like he is establishing a monopolytheism.
Men like the preacher before us exist to separate morons from their money. God and theology are props they use and discard at will. Fast talking preachers are as old as civilization itself. They survive because there's never a shortage of fools who send them money. What IS different is those fools used to be easily recognized and easily dismissed. Now, they make up the bulk of Republican primary voters. This country is facing a moral dilemma, how to reverse decades of conservative sanctioned ignorance and stupidity.
Poor Jeebus. Every day he's gotta listen to the shit that's said in His name.
jesus libel!
Yea, well, if He doesn't like it, He could always DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT*. How's about some of that fire & brimstone and turnin' people into salt? Turn Rick Santorum inside out on live television, and I'll bet the rest would wise up pretty effing quick.
* If He was real, of course.
Of course.
Yeah, well, have YOU ever turned a bag of shit inside out? Srsly, that's some kind of nasty.
Hmmm… "charismatic" pseudo-leader… buncha white people with their right hands raised up in the air, saluting…. hmmm…
Don't forget the openly expressed desire for a nation purged of believers in disfavored religions…
Someone want to explain that not everyone practicing Judeo-Christian ethics worships Jesus Christ? This crap makes my brain hurt.
And it seems that few for those who worship Jesus Christ practice Judeo-Christian ethics.
Or ethics at all, really.
They think they adopted the Jews to help them out with their rapture. No one seems to have clued them in that more Jews are Democrats than Republicans … let alone this kind.
Nobody ever accused the Jooz of being stupid. Which they'd have to be to join a party that depends on them all being killed or converted.
"…that depends on them all being killed or converted."
Converted under the threat of death if they don't.
What about us agnosticators? Can we keep on burning question marks here and there?
Is an agnosticator someone who doesn't know if he's fucking?
reminds me of a favorite old joke…whaddya call a dyslexic agnostic insomniac? (wait for it) someone who lies awake at night wondering if there really IS a dog!
I am shocked – shocked! – that a man who uses his religion to justify his bigotry against women and gay people would also be a bigot against non-Christians. Shocked I tell you.
That this is even a story is only because the guy's batteries haven't run down yet.
You need a lie-down and a cold cloth for your forehead.
Muslims don't worship Mohammed; Buddhists don't worship Buddha. Must be lots more howlers but that's as far as I could watch this asshat.
I cannot wait for this to be the centerpiece of Sean Hannity's "Vetting Santorum."
Although it might not be fair and balanced, as I'm pretty sure that FOX News current slogan is "Venting Santorum."
The Religion of Peace, my ass!
You know, my daughter goes to a preschool run by a Methodist church. When we've been there for various open houses and shows and whatnot, I've seen a ton of posters up talking about respecting all races, all religions, all socioeconomic strata… and it always gives me the startling realization that these hateful, bigoted, loud-mouthed harpies do NOT speak for all Christians. It's one of those things that I always know, logically, in the back of my mind, but it's easy to forget unless you see evidence to the contrary.
I'm still very secular, still reeling from eight years of Catholic school education, but I'm always so glad to see some actual liberal, progressive, caring Christians out there somewhere. Gives me a ray of hope that is often so fleeting.
"There's one god, and his name is Jesus!" Someone has forgotten to give the father and the holy ghost their due.
The Christian God has three names. The Muslim God with his 99 names has them beat.
So, Arthur C. Clarke is the Supreme Potentate?
Buddha Christ, that congregation looks like the Grim Reaper's waiting room. During the standing ovations, I wonder how many people stood up too fast and broke a hip.
Excuse me, that is Buddha Funking Christ on a Pogo Stick. Full title or GTFO.
Not enough?
Preachers like that are flat-out hilarious. You just know they're laying it on thick, trying to get the camera people and stage crew to laugh. Sort of like the way actors will occasionally get goofy with each other towards the end of a long running stage play.
For the sake of this nation's future, I desperately want to believe that… but I think this guy believes what he's saying as much as Santorum does.
Remember this: For every sex and drug scandal you read about involving a bible-thumping preacher, there are hundreds if not thousands involving holy-rollers not famous enough to merit news coverage.
It's show business, and behind the scenes they party like rock stars.
Is this what Santorum is concerned about when he talks about religious people not being allowed to participate in the public sector in a meaningful way?
Haha, just kidding. I know it's not.
The god of Abraham, the god of Issaac and the god of Jacob — there is only one god, there is only one god, and his name is Jesus.
I could be wrong, but I am pretty sure that Jesus was not the god of Abraham, Isaac and/or Jacob.
Fuck you, blasphemer.
I believe that is correct, for a winner of the Daily Double.
Jesus is a time traveler!
Keep an eye out for the Blue Box!
Ask any Muslim, the god of Abraham was Allah.
I'm surprised that he stopped there and didn't come right out and say that the worshippers of the God Of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob killed Jesus.
You might be referring to the trinity, no?
But, how does this affect Bristol Palin??
No on apologized to her.
hahaha! Silly Xtians. They don't know that they're going to be converted to Mormons after they die.
And then converted into GAY Mormons, thanks to the wonder of the Internet.
That's my new interwebz hobby, converting the Mormons into the Ghays.
Also, I'm going to dig them up and put them into new graves, with headstones that say "John Jones- Gay Mormon- Married to Bill Smith Beloved Husband and Devoted Top"
fox news commentary favorably comparing santorum's being blessed by this guy immediately after xenophobic commentary to reverend wright saying controversial things whilst president obama may or may not have been present/hugging a left-wing law professor in 3. . . 2. . . 1 . . .
Most of these guys only know Profit.
I love how these holy rollers never say Jesus. As if "JEEZ-US!!!" is better than just plain Jesus. I guess Jesus is like a 3 Musketeers and "JEEZ-US!!!" is like a Snickers.
No, Jesus is a Pulparindo.
"As long as sexual perversion is becoming normalized…"
This is good news for sexual perversion.
Now that I could masturbate to.
When did we normalize perversion of common sense and logic. That's what I want to know.
I always love how these Holy Roller clowns rant and rant about how horrible things are in the US, but they always end up thanking the Lawd for "this great nation". Somebody needs to take a look at the script sometime.
Its always been a great place for grifters like him. In most other countries his sort is reduced to living in shacks and begging for small change; which locals fork over just to make them leave.
And then they'll say something like the parents whose son just died from bacterial meningitis are so very blessed and lucky because they had the gift of having their son and he'll always be alive with Jesus and in their hearts. No further snark needed, it's built in IMHO.
Silly pdog, EVERYONE know conservatives have a memory span only SLIGHTLY longer than a gnat's!
How long until this Pastor gets found snorting meth off his male hooker's penis?
Or Santorum's?
How long does the photo lab take to get back the prints?
Tingly!
It's nice that the preacher isn't telling God what to do.
I'm sure Santorum would have corrected the preacher on the Christian nation stuff, but the preacher is an old with a cane, and Santorum doesn't believe in correcting the olds, no matter what batshit crazy suff they're shouting.
"God damn Rick Santorum!"
Rick Santorum is The Pusher Man?
Sorry Rick, you Catholics are going to be “left behind“ along with the rest of us, cause the Rapture™ is a Christian fundamentalist sort of thing. You are going to be lumped together with the rest of us. So get used to us untouchables now.
Jesus hates a lot of stuff.
Jesus was ALL about the Hatin'.
Except at Hate-Ashbury. He was mellow there.
If we could just capture the energy of Xtian persecution, we could tell the Saudis to fuck off.
For a round-up of some of Dennis Terry's more whimsical hate-mongering…
http://www.goodasyou.org
Bleck! That's like drinking a bottle of syrup of ipecac.
Look out, Westboro Baptist Church, you have some sizzling competition here!
Thanks, but no thanks. I have work to do — I can't go to bed with a headache again today.
He also says "We don't worship Allah!" Um, yes you do; it's the same god, that Jews, Christians and Muslims all worship.
Just with another name… Just like the Judeos have for God.
The whacky fundies don't believe God and Allah are the same. Not at all. To them Allah is a "moon god". And that's about as deep as I care to get into their fuckedupedness.
I was about to insert a Sailor Moon joke here, but that would push my geek meter way past 11.
No Sailor Moon joke reaches 11…. I was thinking more about what the Bondage Fairies might like to do to him…
I'll be in my bunk.
Does that mean Moonbase Newt is a sekrit Muslim?!?
Too bad for them they're wrong. The big difference is just that the Muslims view Jesus as just a prophet, not an incarnation of god – but it's the same Yahweh / god the father of the Bible.
The Torah and the old testament are basically the same thing, right?
The Torah is the first five books of what Christians call the "Old Testament"-we Joos just call it the Bible.
let's hope there are no Maronite Christians anywhere near this douche bag, or he will get a nice rim shot
That is the kind of plain, simple fact that people like this are unable to comprehend. In fact, a lot of these theocratic state Christians actually have no idea that Islam is a monotheistic religion. Most of them, actually, cannot find their asses in the dark with both hands.
Shouldn't the headline on the YouTube say "Asshole Introduces Santorum – Front Row Sprayed With Stank"?
Its ironic that this man would bless a smegma-smeared Santorum, because smegma and santorum is just about the unholiest combination in the universe.
Show us on the doll where Dennis Terry touched you Rick.
Wonder if he'll get the GCB endorsement, also?
This is bad news for Mitt Romney.
This type of dude is why I'm agnostic. I grew up being yelled at by a Southern Baptist preacher who, I shit you not, would come into the Sunday school class and bitch because we (who were only 8 or 9) were only giving $1 in the offering.
Did he want you to steal the money from the Miracle Children's Network jar on the 7-Eleven counter?
At least his message was crystal clear. It's all about the $$.
To be fair, the distinguishing mark of Christianity is the insistence that their prophet is God; of course they're going to project that hubris onto everyone else.
You got your savior in my deity! You got your deity in my savior!
Two great tastes that taste like shit for everyone else.
No wonder Santorum was there.
Do yourselves a favor and turn on Youtube's closed-captioning. Then go to 2:29 on the top video. You heard it here first, folks: God declares that marriage is between "a man anna wallman."
Stand up and say "Fallow. Powell. Lalo. Lalo." LOLOL, I say! There are lots of lols in that closed captioning!
That's it, time to set up a Shadow Liberal State and shut these assholes out. I call Secretary of Energy. (I like power, but not too much power.)
The current movement of Southern Baptists to, "re-brand" themselves isn't going as smoothly as expected.
And all of you Pagans with your egg-balancing tomorrow can git outta here, too!
That's the most uplifting thing I've seen since the Kardashian family sex tape. [spit!]
Muscular Christ sez: genuflect or GTFO!
WORST REMAKE OF THE APOSTLE EVAR!!!!!!
♪♫ That little cretin is a millionaire ♫♪
I'll bet he's got more than one installed microwave oven, too.
♪Rmoney for nothing and clicks for free.♪
Well, that was unpleasant.
But Obama gets shit for Jeremiah Wright…fucking hypocrites
Even more screwed up when people were trying to claim that Wright's statements about blacks historically getting a quite a bit of less than a fair shake in this country was somehow controversial.
Two things, just in the first 15 seconds:
1. Did this clown ever stop to think that God's will *is* being done? That the guy in the White House now is supposed to be there?
2.) "We want revival." Dennis Terry
"You cain't always git whut you want." Mick Jagger
This pretty much sums up why the Republican Party is a joke without a punchline.
Kanon Tipton or GTFO. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5F3XLSXw1gk&fe…
Allahu Akbar.
If fucktwats like this screecher-man really loved Jeebus they should want to meet him immediately, no? But offer them the chance to be with him right now and they're all, "Nah, it's cool. I'll wait." Fucking hypocrites!
I worship money. Can I stay?
"Gawd, I don't want to tell yeeuw whut ta doo, BUT….."
While DHS is monitoring Twatter, Facebook and the Wonketter, should send a note with the lovely YouTube videos of these sermons to the IRS and ask them to look at the church's tax exempt status. Shit like this is why she be taxed as a entertainment business and treated as a PAC.
And afterward, all three men on stage tossed each others' salad. The end.
We don't worship Mary neither, ya dirty Cafflicks!
This (practicing if demonstrably imperfect) Christian will let his born in the U.S.A. Buddhist wife be removed from the country as soon as she is pried from his cold, dead hand.
I think we're all forgetting that Barack Obama is the real bad guy here.
At 1:38: As long as they continue to kill little babies in our mothers' wombs
So, uh, dropping bombs on people that may include pregnant women, not cool then? Just asking.
Those aren't bombs. They're Freedom Balloons!
I didn't actually think Christians "worshipped" Jesus, I thought we worshiped with Jesus???
Does this clown know that Santorum is a papist?
They're so desperate to have a social conservative back in the White House they'd even take a Catholic. You'd think they would have given up after George "Yes I'm a Christian, I Just Don't Go to Church" Bush didn't give them everything they want. Then again, they HAD a real Christian in Jimmy Carter, but they didn't like him either. Maybe they just enjoy hating.
We welcome full religious diversity in the U.S. As long as you're Baptist, Southern Baptist or Methodist.
don't know about those Methodists, though…some are almost Lutheran
They're not booing. They're saying, Buuuuuuuuuuuuuddhists!
The Christians are tired of being persecuted in America. Here's secret footage of one of their clandestine meetings.
I would pay lots of money to be able to totally kiss another guy in the middle of that satanic service. we have got to keep same-sex kissing until things change!
Is this another phase of The Obama War Against Religion that I keep hearing about?
It's a recruiting poster- for the Obama side.
Good Lord on high, did I really just hear this guy say the god of Abraham, Issac and Jacob is…JESUS?
Yeah, I noticed that too.
I waz just going to make that comment. Oy gevalt.
Yes. Yes, you did.
This is one of the most nauseating things I've ever seen.
This must be that "Christians are being persecuted" crap I keep being lectured about by teabaggers.
No snark. I'd love to say something clever, but I'll settle for just saying something. I promised myself I wouldn't just sit on my hands when another knuckle-dragging mouth-breathing bubba defined Christian faith to others as jingo-istic, atheist-bashing, gay-hating xenophobia. The ones that make the loudest noise gather the most attention. For lack of a clever rejoinder, let me just say, "we're not all like that." We just need to speak louder, and more frequently. http://johnshore.com/best-hits-2/
"There's only one God! And his name is Jesus!"
Errrrm – which of you heathen-atheist-Buddhist-Muslins wants to be the one to correct this asshole on what his own bible says?
Okay, I'll go. God's name as told to Moses is the Hebrew letters "Yod-Heh-Vav-Heh", usually transliterated as YHVH or YHWH. Pronunciation is uncertain-traditionally, Jews don't say His name but use the name "Adonai", "My Lord". The Tetragrammaton is an amalgamation of the Hebrew words for "Was-Is-Will Be." In other words, The Eternal.
Jesus (or JAAAAY-ZUS!) ain't it.
Congrats! That's 60 words more than this clown has ever read of the Bible!
Love his Foghorn Leghorn moment. "We don't worship Buddha…I say, we don't worship Buddha.."
I say, I say, that's a joke, son…A JOKE
I can't help but notice that, yet again, the Pastafarians have not made the list. This is an unacceptable Outrage.
We Demand the right to be demeaned, belittled, discriminated against and treated as shittily by the evangelical Christian/Right wing Catholic axis as all the other religions and philosophies!
RAMEN!
ARRRRR!
Playin' the hits!
Got no snark for this. Too scared. If these people have their way this country will be a Christian version of Iran. This has nothing to do with going -back- to the way we were before. Fundamentalism is a radical new political philosophy that is asserting itself in many countries, including this one. It is not a joke. It is very, very dangerous.
Did Santorum just cough to try to hide his laughing when the preacher man said "I pray tonight for our president"?
I see what you did there!
Let me just say that you've got to be pretty fucked in the head to hate Buddhists, and that includes you, fundamentalist Hindus. Sorry.
Good rule: never trust a man with two front names. Also, Jesus is coming back, but this time he is really pissed, too, as well as….
wait a second…
i thought rick santorum said that protestants aren't real christians. and. yet. here he is in a protestant type establishment, begging for acceptance.
boy. you know what? the signs usually aren't this overt….
http://videocafe.crooksandliars.com/heather/santo…
Does that guy know Rick Santorum is a Papist?
I know…It's a dated joke. But the snark is there in spirit.
We've all been there dude – but the snark IS there in spirit, so it's OK.
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