BUT DID SHE HUG A BLACK MAN?  12:44 pm March 18, 2012

BUSTED! Grainy 25-Year-Old VIDEO ‘Shows’ Michelle ‘Whitey’ Obama Sitting In a Harvard Hallway

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Busted! Michelle Obama read a book!What would we do without Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller for the relevant, important Ivory Tower news from 1988 — and more importantly, does Ghost Andrew Breitbart know about this? Daily Caller star reporter Matthew Boyle (recently seen blaming AG Eric Holder for the lack of a pre-crime unit in DC’s Metro) is on the case of Michelle “Whitey” Obama’s race-baiting college and law school days, by linking to some Pajamas Media dude who has unearthed a Smoking Gun!

Newly surfaced footage shows a young woman who appears to be Michelle Obama, and several other students, staging a sit-in in the Harvard Law School dean’s office in 1988.

According to J. Christian Adams of Pajamas Media, the video depicts the students — including the woman who appears to be Mrs. Obama — conducting a protest to “solve the minority faculty problem,” as one student puts it, by implementing race-based hiring practices.

President Obama’s time at Harvard Law has received fresh scrutiny lately, including new attention on relationship with Derrick Bell, the first tenured black law professor at Harvard and the main author of the controversial “Critical Race Theory.”

The White House did not immediately respond to The Daily Caller’s request for comment regarding identifying the woman who appears to be Michelle Obama.

We wonder if Buzzfeed-approved reporter Boyle also told the White House that if they did not respond, he would consider that a confirmation that Michelle Obama bakes the blood of Christian children into her matzo brei?

Regardless! Your editrix has studied Critical Race Theory, in (Elitist) graduate school, and she agrees: Critical Race Theory can actually be really annoying sometimes! But its basic underpinnings — that the law and the courts have consistently been used to keep power and privileges for the majority — is fairly inarguable, unless you believe that American Jesus decided Dred Scott the way He did because of how much He hates fetuses.

Anyhoo, we can’t figure out which nice young lady in the following video is supposed to be Michelle Obama, but since it’s from 1988, and she got her JD from Harvard in 1988 (Affirmative Action baby, obvs), and she would have been a pretty piss-poor female African-American Harvard Law student if she wasn’t Radically and Alinskily hanging out quietly in this hallway for a very well-mannered sit-in, we agree with the Daily Caller that she probably was.

 
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{ 252 comments }

Barb March 18, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Well, in Tucker's defense, they all do look alike.

Dashboard Buddha March 18, 2012 at 1:12 pm

Interestingly enough, so do all pasty ass, bowtie wearing douchebags…look alike, that is.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:46 pm

And dress alike, and talk alike…

Dashboard Buddha March 18, 2012 at 2:25 pm

♫ …you can lose your mind
♫…when douchebags, are two of a kind!

Bezoar March 18, 2012 at 2:28 pm

Ha! I got that, Patsy Duke show, mid '60s, right? See, I'm old but I can still uh, I can still… damn, where was I going with that?

LionHeartSoyDog March 18, 2012 at 4:31 pm

And also a hotdog makes them lose control, alike.

Tilley March 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

I continue to protest the appellation "douchebag" for such individuals, as they do not deserve to be associated with vaginas in any way! It's enema-bag, dammit! enema-bag!

Bezoar March 18, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Why needlessly defame enemas? I propose 'colostomy bag'.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 2:46 pm

Colostomy bags save people's lives.

I suggest "rectal wart."

doloras March 18, 2012 at 7:19 pm

I had an enema once before surgery, and I am shocked and appalled that some people do that for fun.

Loaded_Pants March 18, 2012 at 6:10 pm

Santorum sack?

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Giant Oozing Pilonidal Ass Cyst (GOPAC).

glamourdammerung March 18, 2012 at 2:58 pm

Well, in Tucker's defense, they all do look alike.

The sad part is that I think that is the exact reasoning being used by these clowns.

starfanglednut March 18, 2012 at 8:44 pm

It really is. They're not kidding.

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:01 pm

I think I spotted her. She's the one snacking on the white Christian fetus. This was in the early days of teh Atkins diet, mind you.

starfanglednut March 18, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Fetuses make such a healthy snack. All that protein, and low carb too!

redarmyzombie March 19, 2012 at 1:23 am

Indeed. I'm quite partial to Fetus a la Mode, Fetus dipped in Plum Sauce, and Fetus Tartare.

anniegetyerfun March 18, 2012 at 12:49 pm

I think I once covered a tree in rainbow-colored ribbons for Gay Pride week in college. I hope no one got any photos, because I was naked, and I'm pretty sure my physique at the time could be described as "Santorum-esque".

Advn2rgirl March 18, 2012 at 1:04 pm

We painted the U of Michigan part of the AIDS quilt in my apartment. Do I have to tell my husband I'm gay?

Callyson March 18, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Not if you live in Tennessee.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:47 pm

I hope they don't catch that grainy security camera footage of my kissing a boy in a hallway during my undergraduate years. For as close as we were, the aspirin could have fallen out from between my knees! Heavens!!

glamourdammerung March 18, 2012 at 2:59 pm

I'm pretty sure my physique at the time could be described as "Santorum-esque"

Pasty white and flabby?

Twinklesnot March 18, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Brown and viscous? SORRY. Sorry.

RadioStalingrad March 18, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Gotcha!!1!
Derrick Bell: History's greatest monster.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:24 pm

He doesn't have the awesome guns to dethrone Her Majesty, Michelle, from her perch as the Monsterious of All of History's Great Monsters. **shudders, just thinking about her**

Boojum_Reborn March 18, 2012 at 12:58 pm

Read John Tehranian's "Whitewashed". Great book on how various peoples became white through meeting perceptions of white behavior.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Tehranian?!!! Sounds Ee-ranny to me. I ain't readin' that godddamn thing.

Boojum_Reborn March 18, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Yeah, but now he's white.

horsedreamer_1 March 18, 2012 at 5:57 pm

What about my fantasy baseball draft & follow pick, Julio Teheran? They say he's Colombian (Snow Mexican), but I'm suspicious.

Biff March 18, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Mormons thought you had to die first.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:56 pm

So how do you explain the Irish?

Serious question: how did the Irish become white? I remember right up until my grandfather's day Irish weren't allowed to apply to certain jobs or obtain housing in most neighborhoods.

chascates March 18, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Irish cartoons of about 100-150 years ago portray them as looking like pre Cro-Magnon humanoids: http://chnm.gmu.edu/exploring/images/florance.jpg http://www.latinamericanstudies.org/ellis-island/

As I'm Irish on my mother's side of the family I can state the prejudices involved with the stereotypes have a basis in fact.

Also: http://mig82.ucc.ie/stereotypes/images/douglas20….
Also.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Hey now…

glamourdammerung March 18, 2012 at 3:00 pm

Which is odd to me because people whining about how Irish they are have tended to be the most racist folks I have encountered in this country.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 3:03 pm

They finally got whiteness so now they're afraid of losing it.

Boojum_Reborn March 18, 2012 at 3:20 pm

In either Whitewashed or an earlier paper, Tehranian talks about a court case where a black defendant claimed provocation because the person he attacked called him "Irish.". True story.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 12:56 am

It's really something about how when "ethnic" white people "arrived" at whiteness how many in the community totally turned on anyone who'd not as yet achieved whitness or would never. Same thing happened to a lot of Italians, I you're seeing it a lot in some hispanic communities out west.

Boojum_Reborn March 18, 2012 at 3:18 pm
DCBloom March 18, 2012 at 12:59 pm

Yes, well….. I'm sure that will go a long way to change independent minds. I'm sure the Prez is really nervous about this.

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Yeah all those soft spoken black egghead poindexters are about as scary as Steve Urkel.

the_problem_child March 18, 2012 at 1:00 pm

I think I saw whitey walking in. She was definitely (?) white. (Maybe hispanic.) In any case, demonstrably NOT sitting.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:28 pm

Prolly couldn't sit after being raped by all them radical negroes!!!! Bring me a rope! Find a tree!!! We'll learn 'em a lesson!

Maman March 18, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Have highlighter, will protest!

Pat_Pending March 18, 2012 at 1:54 pm

and it's a YELLOW highlighter. Clearly a slight against Asians everywhere.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Michelle Malkin is deeply offended.

HistoriCat March 18, 2012 at 4:52 pm

Yes but what is her reaction to this video?

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 12:58 am

Silly, Fare. Everyone (that is to say only Michelle Malkin) knows that Ms. Malkin is white.

Boojum_Reborn March 18, 2012 at 3:24 pm

That's a blah highlighter, also known as a Sharpie. She'll cut a bitch.

ManchuCandidate March 18, 2012 at 1:04 pm

What a horrible world this is when disadvantaged people who are smart would want something better for themselves and others.

BerkeleyBear March 18, 2012 at 3:52 pm

And might actually want their professors to reflect their perspectives and life experiences to some small degree. Somehow, when blahs seek diversity, very evil. When the GOP asserts that schools only teach subjects that reflect the values of the white majority, though, that's somehow "common sense" or evidence of "superior morality."

Designer_Rants March 18, 2012 at 1:04 pm

What a SNOB !

Callyson March 18, 2012 at 1:06 pm

The White House had better things to do than to immediately respond to The Daily Caller’s request for comment regarding a hyped up story about something that happened over 20 years ago that may have involved Michelle Obama.
/fixed

Crowe2011 March 18, 2012 at 1:06 pm

Holy shit! The Obamas were black back in College?! They never mentioned that during the election! I can accept an African-American President, but only if he spent a lifetime ignoring the issue of race. Frankly, if we're going to let a black man be President of the Harvard Law Review the least he could do in return is overlook things like the racial injustice of mandatory minimums. Alan Keyes 2016!

Salam Bombay March 18, 2012 at 1:07 pm

Comments on that Pajamas media article are a thing of beauty. Nowhere on the internet can you find so much white angst condensed together.

Pat_Pending March 18, 2012 at 1:53 pm

"Bananas in Pajamas
are coming down the stairs…"

commiegirl March 18, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Aw, my son had one of those when he just a baby Communist! How he loved that goddamn thing!

Designer_Rants March 18, 2012 at 1:07 pm

The White House did not immediately respond to The Daily Caller’s request for comment regarding our attempt to waste the entire world's time.

Harry_S_Truman March 18, 2012 at 1:08 pm

I saw six or seven Michelle (Robinson) Obamas in that clip–all of them black and all wearing black. It's her, all right.

Advn2rgirl March 18, 2012 at 1:08 pm

You know, all the Crits (Critical Race Theory, the Law & Economics movement, heck: the Law & movement) just kind of floored me. I remember calling home as a first year and telling my dad, "You won't believe this! White people think it's NEWS that powerful people set things up to keep their power! No, seriously – there's a whole thing about it. You can tell the professors 'cause they don't wear ties. No, really."

OurDailyBread March 18, 2012 at 1:09 pm

Some of my best friends are Harvard Law graduates.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Mitt and his friends own some of Harvard Law's best graduates.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:49 pm

"I've never been to Harvard Law, but I'm close friends with people who own buildings there."

Biel_ze_Bubba March 18, 2012 at 2:06 pm

HIs wife owns two!

Barb March 18, 2012 at 1:09 pm

"Michelle Obama bakes the blood of Christian children into her matzo brei"

I'm glad that someone is addressing this issue. What about her practice of force feeding children fresh foods, sun ripened vegetables and whole grains? If we have healthy children, the terrorists have won! If global warming is for realz then we will need that extra layer or two of fat to survive the snowpocalypse.

I should get my husband to run for POTUS. The Rose Garden would be made entirely of bacon and America would be great again.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 1:14 pm

I think we should be putting together a cookbook. Something with a catchy title, like uh, To Serve Man.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:36 pm

Oh the OUTRAGE!!!

Yet, somehow slipping under the radar is the mayor of OKC who bragged, yes BRAGGED on Bill Maher's show about his constituents losing a million pounds. He is a white male Republican, but surely that wouldn't make any difference. Would it?

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:32 pm

his constituents losing a million pounds.

That's kinda weird. How'd he get them interested in investing on the London Stock Exchange in the first place?

AlterNewt March 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

"…We take you now to the Bacon Garden…"

imissopus March 18, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Matzo brei. Oy, Michelle must own stock in Ex-Lax or something. Big Laxative is in the tank for Obama! Pun intended!

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 4:37 pm

If by bacon you mean livestock, I would be all for it if they were kept in suitable accomodations outside the whitehouse. Back during the Dubya years the pigs went rampant inside the place, Cheney, Rover, good grief they were almost legion…

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 1:02 am

Free-range, grass-fed, organic children are the best.

deanbooth March 18, 2012 at 1:10 pm

Ok, Michelle, which is it? "Sit In" or "Let's Move"? Hypocrite!

anniegetyerfun March 18, 2012 at 1:13 pm

She was for sitting before she was against it!

neiltheblaze March 18, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Next we'll find out she ate pizza in her dorm.

Harry_S_Truman March 18, 2012 at 1:21 pm

. . . and drank Tab with it.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:50 pm

And once, just on a dare, she did two loads of laundry at the same time.

Sharkey March 18, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Now THAT would be a great video!

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:24 pm

There was a photo, but the GOP Photoshopped Rmoney's head on her body and sent it out as a press release.

Left_Leftie March 19, 2012 at 12:10 am

Two loads of WHITES!

finallyhappy March 18, 2012 at 3:11 pm

yes!!! proves that Michelle and Barack are Jewish. Tab was THE drink of Jewish girls when I was in HS and college(ok, they are somewhat younger than me but I claim them)

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:25 pm

Yes, Tab removed all the calories from M&Ms you ate with it.

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Well yeah, why else would you drink that stuff? I lived on Tab and pizza and could do a three course meal in one electric frypan in my dorm room. In retrospect, I ate better then than I do now, heavy sigh, (pun intended).

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:31 pm

I thought that was Whoopi sittin' there next to Michelle!

Pat_Pending March 18, 2012 at 1:51 pm

oh, that fat-assed BITCH…

swordfis March 18, 2012 at 1:13 pm

This is a sickening development. Now it's ok to be a racist or Antisemite if the victim is a "leftist." Do you know who else victimized…..?

GuanoFaucet March 18, 2012 at 1:13 pm

The White House did not immediately respond to The Daily Caller’s request for comment regarding identifying the woman who appears to be Michelle Obama.

Keep waiting by the computer in your parent's basement. I'm sure the White House will respond to your very important request any minute now.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Try crank calling the White House hotline. They'll let you know if their refrigerator's running.

nounverb911 March 18, 2012 at 1:16 pm

Where is the 1988 tape of Tucker getting his diaper changed by his mother?

comrad_darkness March 18, 2012 at 1:22 pm

More likely the tape of his mother putting a thicker rubber mattress cover on his bed in 1995.

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Trick question! Tucker's mom never changed him, she had a nanny for that and for showing affection for little Tucky during his formative years. Then she was sent away when he hit 12 years of age and this made him the wretched excuse for a human being that he is today!*

*Not intended to represent the actual truth, but an amalgam of trustafarian upbringing, your mileage may vary, void in all states except Michigan and Oklahoma.

rmjagg1 March 18, 2012 at 5:12 pm

she'd always yank it over his head – the bloopers are funny

comrad_darkness March 18, 2012 at 1:21 pm

I love her more and more every day. Does she have a sister?

imissopus March 18, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Urkel went to Harvard Law?

JustPixelz March 18, 2012 at 7:15 pm

Yes, he did that.

gullywompr March 18, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Don't worry, Santorum's going to get rid of Blahvard Law School.

comrad_darkness March 18, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Who'd have known the right wing crazy dial went to 13?

Biel_ze_Bubba March 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

There's no stop on the wingnut crazy dial … they'll keep right on winding it 'till they blow a fuse or burst into flames.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 1:04 am

Actually, it stops at 10 like all the others, but they broke the knob off, and now it's stuck.

Arken March 18, 2012 at 1:25 pm

Plus I hear she married a BLACK MAN!

Veritas78 March 18, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Just shows how racist she is!

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Worse, she married half of a white man and half of a black man! Bigamist!!

Tilley March 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

People who claim O'Bammy's a "black man" are the real racists because he's also half-white, plus they're hypocrits [sic].

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:27 pm

Not only that but she married a man who eats Spam. Now that's LOVE.

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:39 pm

For breakfast even!

OT, but I wonder if Mittens claimed he loved Spam for breakfast while campaigning for the Hawaiian Presidential caucuses. Talk about a tough political decision to make!

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 11:25 pm

DerrickWildcat wins that one. He supposed that Romney would claim to eat cheesy poi.

gingerland62 March 18, 2012 at 1:26 pm

During the same era Ron Paul was "pallin' around " with the Klan. Newt was cheating on his cancer ridden wife. Santorum was pro choice, and Romney was helping to destroy the middle class.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:53 pm

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 18, 2012 at 2:09 pm

You mean there's something Mitt has not flip-flopped on?

starfanglednut March 18, 2012 at 8:58 pm

He's not sure. He goes back and forth on that one.

pinkocommi March 18, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Michelle Obama's problem is that she (1) thought critically about a serious issue, and then (2) cared enough to protest about it. If only she channeled that energy into watching an endless loop of Real Housewives Keeping Up with the Kardashians at the Jersey Shore, we could finally accept her as one of us average Americans who have perfected the art form of casually ignoring injustice.

imissopus March 18, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Look at those crazy radicals, quietly studying while sitting in the hallways in clear violation of the fire code. My only consolation is that my racist grandfather didn't live to see such flagrant disregard for the greatest civilization on Earth.

SexySmurf March 18, 2012 at 1:28 pm

No way that's Michelle; look how scrawny and out-of-shape her arms are.

RadioStalingrad March 18, 2012 at 1:37 pm

The comments are precious.
Absolutely! Why should anyone think that exposing the Obamas as race pimps is news? The media in the U.S. has carried water for the race pimps for decades! They will think the Obamas deserve honors for agitating for discrimination against whites. This will also shore up the black base for Obama, people who are disappointed that he didn’t pay their mortgages like he said he was going to. So far this is not news. That said, I am anxious to see/hear what ELSE Andrew had up his sleeve before his unfortunate death.
xactly!
If Pigford (another Breitbart adventure)doesn’t convince you that you are now working for “the Black Man”, you haven’t been paying attention, and nothing will wake you up until something really bad happens.
Just wait. It’s coming.

Pat_Pending March 18, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Yeah, it's coming all right. "Zombie Negroes" to a theater near you!

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Race pimps?! I kind of like that. I want to be a race pimp! "You want to fock my seesters? – I got white ones, chicano ones, blah ones…"

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Chicken_thief, an Equal Opportunity Employer.

Fare la Volpe March 18, 2012 at 1:58 pm

…discrimination against whites

"Black people want to be treated just like whites. Clearly white people are the real victims."

Z Crudmonger March 18, 2012 at 2:59 pm

you are now working for “the Black Man”

Today we are all employed Americans! Where do I clock in at my new employer, Black Man LLC? Awesome benefits, I hear.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:32 pm

The Black Man pays your mortgage?? Get me somma dat!

BerkeleyBear March 18, 2012 at 4:00 pm

I've now been eagerly awaiting "the coming race war" since my freshman year in college, when a nutbag student paper columnist named Max Boot (yes, that one who is now described as a "historian" despite never going to grad school or really learning anything in college) titled a column that. 22 years and counting. I hope my get out of genocide free cards from my friends in La Raza and the NAACP are still valid when it finally gets here.

Loaded_Pants March 18, 2012 at 4:51 pm

Also, the guv'mint seems to be takin' its time in taking all the guns away from the law-'biding citizens.
That bs has been around for as long as I can remember.

LionHeartSoyDog March 18, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Chuckie Manson all Helter Skelter in 1968, also.

The_Trainman March 18, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Occupy Harvard. Who knew! The lady was ahead of her time.

smashedinhat March 18, 2012 at 1:40 pm

Pajamas Media, Matthew Boyle and Tucker Carlson. The trifecta of WTF bringing us the insane and inane on a regular basis. This typing is cutting into my Sunday drinking.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:34 pm

Not to mention "Andrew," who needs no other name, working-while-dead even harder than Hendrix and Jim Morrison.

smashedinhat March 18, 2012 at 5:14 pm

Zombies are always in vogue.

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:45 pm

Hey, if you can't type and drink at the same time, Blame yo'self!

angerbear March 18, 2012 at 1:40 pm

People who hate the Obamas find new reason to hate them–details at 11.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:35 pm

Newspaper editors could use that headline every day and get started on their drinking earlier.

chicken_thief March 18, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Oh, for the love of Jeebus. Who the hell is that blah guy with the coke bottle glasses?! That's the best they could do? With all that ebonics and shit I couldn't understand a word the dimwit said. Clearly, he got in, and is able to stay at Harvard only because of Affirmative Action. Sheesh! If Lou Sarah had gone to Harvard, she could have clearly articulated their grievances in Real American American.

chascates March 18, 2012 at 2:15 pm

Urkel.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Now this is just embarrassing. The quality of the Scandals of this Administration has fallen very far in the past three years and it makes me sad for America.

I really miss the World-Class scandals of the last decade: male "escorts" posing as journalists and given priority in news conferences, young party apparatchniks installed as Political Officers in Federal Agencies over Nobel prizewinning scientists, Government personnel forced to sign Loyalty oaths, Party recruitment and election politics run out of every Federal Agency office and coordinated with the West Wing, closed meetings on environmental and energy policy with with vice president and oil companies with the environmental org's and scientists helpfully excluded, corporations blatantly writing legislation, obsessive focus on "anti-missile defense" to the exclusion of the genuine threat of terrorism. Ignoring the August 6th PDB ("Bin Laden determined to strike inside the US.") mismanaging the Afghanistan war, letting bin laden escape to Pakistan, creating the rationale to wage war against Iraq out of whole cloth ("fixing the facts around the policy") pulling the UN inspectors out of Iraq because they found nothing, invading a foreign country without provocation and under false pretenses (for anyone else, this would be called a "War Crime"), invading with a very understaffed ground army and being utterly unprepared to occupy said country (Rumsfield: "You go to war with the army you have…"), installing Randian Ideologues with no idea how to run the country, failing to collect the huge amounts of weapons in the country, firing all the Baathists in the army and failing to collect the weapons, shipping the largest transfer of cash in US history to Iraq and promptly losing track of it, pulling resources out of Afghanistan and ignoring the country for years, letting relations with Pakistan erode, ignoring Bin laden, running two wars completely off the books, implementing Medicare Part D and the Tax Cuts without paying for them and by actions, foolish policy and bellicose rhetoric becoming one of the most distrusted and reviled presidents in modern US history.

I miss those days.

MilwaukeeKent March 18, 2012 at 2:14 pm

That's an amazing list! Well, at least they didn't let the world economy walk off a cliff…Oh wait.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Yeah, and I forgot stuff too, I'm sure. In addition, there's things I didn't add because I got tired of writing and I'm not good enough to craft the Chichikovovich -level Tome that a full accounting would require.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:39 pm

Well, you remembered enough to clearly indicate you are not an American. Our memories don't hold more than 10 month of information. Not like those Europeans who still remember stuff the Germans did to their grandparents.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 4:43 pm

Blast! Now my cover is blown! Must call S.O.R.O.S. Central Control for immediate extraction!

ManchuCandidate March 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Yeah. It doesn't make up for the 8 year scandal of W's clownish admin.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Well, you know..You go to the Election with the scandals you have, not the scandals you wish you have.

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:43 pm

Let's face it, in that regard, W is *very* hard act to follow.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 5:37 pm

You know who else…

Aw, forget it.

Bezoar March 18, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Thank you, that was great. I can't remember all that horrible shit at once, even though I know it all happened. It seems to have in some way eroded my cognitive faculties.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 2:50 pm

I started calling it the "Touretts Administration" during the 2nd term because I was yelling at the TV so much. Almost wore out the MUTE button.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Yours too? Now I can't turn off the sound when that commercial starring the shrieking piglet comes on.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Wheee! Wheeeeeee! Whe Whe Wheee! SHUT UP!!! SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP!! *crash*

Yes. Me too.

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Don't forget trying to appoint an unqualified crony to the Supreme Court! That was one of my faves :)

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Oh, yes – even the Right Wingers got pissed about that one.And there's so much more. I was getting progressively more Enraged, it was affecting my skills and I had to stop.

Biff March 18, 2012 at 3:39 pm

That stunt was calculated. When everyone stopped laughing about Harry, they all figured that Roberts would be just fine, forgetting the role he played down in Floriduh…

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 4:00 pm

Even worse: she was replaced by Alito

Biff March 18, 2012 at 5:23 pm

Of course you are correct, but I never let my lack of facts interfere with a rant.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:42 pm

I smell Rove.

Biff March 18, 2012 at 5:23 pm

No doubt, but eww!

Chichikovovich March 18, 2012 at 2:56 pm

pulling the UN inspectors out of Iraq because they found nothing

And don't forget… "and then claiming that Saddam threw them out, continuing to `demand' that Saddam let them in again, attacking and smearing the UN's chief inspector when he published op-eds saying things like "What are you yammering about? Saddam was fine with having us look around. You were the ones who demanded we leave."

Under these circumstances, naturally the media will present the administrations claims as faithfully as if every major American journalist were really a tape recorder, and never refer to the UN inspectors who spoke out without attaching words like "controversial" before their names.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 3:12 pm

Thanks! As you can see above, I had too few skills and too much accumulated Rage to continue and I deliberately left things out. Please feel free to elaborate at will.

The Bush Admin. played the Media like a favorite instrument, the final goal of the R's multi-pronged strategy. Assault all the MSM with accusations of "Liberal Bias" for 20 years, develop an alternate media dedicated to party ideology, threaten to cut access to reporters who don't play along and "embed" media personnel in military units to bring them "within the system" and to best guide the narrative.
Tactically Brilliant and brilliantly executed. They'd be in power still, but for the glaring flaw in the system, Well, two glaring flaws. Firstly, they lost all the benefits of a free oppositional media, that "keeps them honest" and allows for course corrections and Secondly: They were highly incompetent administrators working off a discredited and dysfunctional ideology and an ossified intellectual base.
They were destined to fail , spectacularly. I just wish they didn't take so much good and so many people with them as they fell.

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Don't worry, given the crazies out there, we will be back to business as usual after this election or the next one. Intelligent leaders may come and go, but the stupid and wreckless sort are always in the wings and available.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 5:39 pm

Thanks! I was getting much too happy there.

HistoriCat March 18, 2012 at 5:05 pm

In other words, (picture of W) "miss me yet?" Fuck no.

Also, I think you forgot "exposed a CIA operative in retaliation for her husband's objections to trumped up evidence."

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Yes but, to be fair, by that time my knuckles were turning white and blood was pulsing into my sclerae, making it difficult to see. I had to walk away & leave all the other myriad Outrages in the fine hands of the Wonkette Commentariat. Thanks!

HistoriCat March 18, 2012 at 7:47 pm

The Wonkette Collective is on the task – courage comrade!

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 7:54 pm

Thanks…Thanks. Whew. *Picks up glass of Rum, hand shaking*

Aaaahhhhhhhhh…..

starfanglednut March 18, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Best. Run on. Sentence. Ever.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 9:53 pm

Yeah, I did let that get out of hand. Sometimes these things take on a life of themselves and run.
Thanks!

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 1:13 am

All that (and , oh, so much more) in just eight fucking years. Dear god.

However much someone may not like the guy, when Obama earnestly warns that "we can't go back", he's not just warning for his own sake. He remembers like the rest of us. Only a Republican elephant forgets.

C_R_Eature March 19, 2012 at 5:46 am

So much more, I started typing in the list, as things occurred to me and I had to make myself stop. That's one, long, run-on sentence of Outrages there.

The Republican Elephant forgets because it wants to forget. And it's paid to forget.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 6:19 am

It's crazy how easy it is to run down a list of the sins of the Bush administration. It's not even about being a bitter liberal; you literally just have to think back a few years and the stuff is so incredibly blatant that you can't forget it even if you wanted to.

You're right. Republican Elephants have conveniently selective amnesia, at least the leadership.

C_R_Eature March 19, 2012 at 6:52 am

I absolutely hate historical revisionism, of any kind, but it's especially important that we don't forget just what this band of petty self-absorbed criminals put the whole world through the last decade. No matter how many people tell us to just "get over it and move on".

nirrti_rachelle March 18, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Meanwhile, somewhere in the White House, a black woman with bangin' arms desperately hopes no one discovers that one picture of her playing beer pong during that frat party she went to one time……

ChiRon8 March 18, 2012 at 1:45 pm

"annoying" as well as "fairly inarguable"? Now THAT is a winning combination! Can we just all kill ourselves now?

Pat_Pending March 18, 2012 at 1:47 pm

These people have just GOT to stop being intentionally dark-skinned in public. I'm offended and frightened. Besides, think of the children!

Lascauxcaveman March 18, 2012 at 3:49 pm

I know, it's like they're mocking us. How dare they.

johnnyzhivago March 18, 2012 at 1:47 pm

It looks to me as if those two are plotting something… Maybe the 9/11 attacks???

vulpes82 March 18, 2012 at 1:56 pm

History's greatest monster!

johnnyzhivago March 18, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Second greatest, after Lady Gaga.

Sassomatic March 18, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Damn, dude, why these uppity black people got to act so uppity AND black at the same time?

neiltheblaze March 18, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Drat these intrepid conservatives! Prying open our most deeply held secrets!

johnnyzhivago March 18, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Conspiracy solved! If you look REALLY carefully, you can see she's forging the missing long form birth certificate in that photo.

weej_bain March 18, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Photos of DRats attending protests while in college are expected. Madam Editrix, for balance how about some typical photos of Rethug college activities. For example, where are the photos of Haley Barber doing nekid kegstands while an undergrad at Ol' Miss? Equal time, please.

BerkeleyBear March 18, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Or at least the one of Romney meeting with pro-Vietnam War people while he was briefly enrolled at Stanford. He apparently offered to help organize a pro-war rally (this was before his dad had a conversion on the issue of involvement in SE Asia).

weej_bain March 18, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Or a host, veritable host, of Rethug chinkenhawks – including Barber, getting their deferments.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:45 pm

Not a host. All of them, Katie.

starfanglednut March 18, 2012 at 9:13 pm

Whilst snorting lines of the wings of their personal planes.

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:54 pm

I think I saw a picture of Haley Barbour doing a nekid kegstand. It was on the "Separated at Birth?" website.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 1:16 am

And George Allen just cold hanging nooses around his dorm room and sending minority students animal heads in the mail?

JohnHoffman March 19, 2012 at 12:36 pm

Hey! I think I remember wandering around drunk/stoned at several college hippie protest marches in the early 1970's, and never once did my image appear in the local news media. I am pretty sure I was wearing beads, but the pants are iffy.

Sharkey March 18, 2012 at 2:07 pm

She will do ANYTHING to get on TV.

donner_froh March 18, 2012 at 2:08 pm

People who remember the infamous 1986 Harvard Law sit in:

1) Matthew Boyle

2) Maybe someone else

Antispandex March 18, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Ladies having a sit-in and no one is beating the crap out of them? Yeah, it's probably Harvard. The FLILTF? Well, that's tougher call.

Blueb4sunrise March 18, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Can't be sure, but at 1:39, down the hall in white t-shirt…. might be Hitler?

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:56 pm

You know who else might be Hitler?

No, no, forget about that.

chascates March 18, 2012 at 2:17 pm

I'm sure Michelle Obama's hatred for America began before Harvard Law. Probably from going to Communist Martyrs Preschool.

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 9:59 pm

And Malcolm X in the Middle School.

DemmeFatale March 18, 2012 at 2:20 pm

I love how dear little Tucker feels he must fill the void (ew) left by Breitbart.

(He's Breitbart-lite! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!)

JohnnyQuick March 18, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Have you seen Tucker Carlson lately? He's not falling on the 'lite' side of the salad bar anymore.

Loaded_Pants March 18, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Gained the weight back that he lost on DWTS, did he?

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 5:03 pm

Slowly the trustafarian nymph transforms into the mature adult shitbag. The facial bloating, the growth of a beard and unkempt hair will complete the transformation. Unlike most shitbags, those that metamorphose from trustafarians do not need to attach to a host organism for sustenance, but can independently go about spewing shit without the need of siphoning sustenance from a larger host such as the Kochs or others.

barto March 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Honestly, is there no bottom to the depths of these people's hatred of Merka? This will definitely derail any "hopes" they had of a second term, fershure.

MilwaukeeKent March 18, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Hah! They've got us this time. Proof positive right there, maybe, that Michelle Obama was black in 1988. This here is what they're reduced to? Things like this? Can I be embarassed for them, because really, they're incapable of even knowing how silly they look. Hint, Tucker, it's not just the bow tie that has people snickering when you enter a room.

Vecchiojohn March 18, 2012 at 2:26 pm

It's her all right – I'd recognize the back of that head anywhere.

Sharkey March 18, 2012 at 2:29 pm

She's got a good explanation though. She was high on the "marijuana".

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 2:35 pm

I think we're all missing Boyle's underlying point: when did we start allowing blah's and wimmin's to get schoolin' at all?

Bezoar March 18, 2012 at 2:41 pm

What's most apparent here is the obsession churning within the people who are determined to find something awful here. What is the scene from Hamlet? (Poorly remembered) "Hey, doesn't that cloud look like a hamster?" "Why, yes, I believe it does!" "No, wait a minute, it looks more like a giraffe-" "Why yes, now that you mention it, it does look more like a giraffe!". Etc.

not that Dewey March 18, 2012 at 2:43 pm

"See what happens when you encourage the wrong people to go to college?"

-Rick Santorum

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Wasn't Saint W. a raging drunk in college and didn't he continue said lifestyle until he reached the tender age of 40? One might almost suspect there is a double standard applied here…

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 2:57 pm

"W"? W who?

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Yeah, you're right. 2001-2009 were the dark ages created by the shadow of Bill Clinton's shlong. Very little is known about this time except that it was Obama's fault.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 3:14 pm

It was a Shameful part of our history. We don't speak of it now.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 4:49 pm

I never understood why that photo of W. as a cheerleader didn't automatically disqualify him from the presidency. Had there been a photo of John Kerry as a cheerleader, it would have been proof-positive he had a raging case of Teh Ghey. A cheerleader as COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF?!?!?! We can't have it!!! Yet, we did.

Sharkey March 18, 2012 at 2:47 pm

It was lucky for her that pepper spray hadn't been invented yet.

freakishlywrong March 18, 2012 at 2:55 pm

She is History's greatest monster.

commiegirl March 18, 2012 at 2:55 pm

You guys, @abwisdom would like us to stop being disrespectful jackasses making fun of the first family. So, you know, STOP IT.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 3:15 pm

Are we in trouble again? That didn't take long!

finallyhappy March 18, 2012 at 3:15 pm

huh, I am not making fun – I know for a fact that the Obamas are actually middle-eastern Jews(thus the dark complexion) and closely related to me

Blueb4sunrise March 18, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Now?

commiegirl March 18, 2012 at 3:21 pm

Oh no, AB is mad at yr Wonkette for making fun of the first family in this very post! Because …. ?

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Andrew Breitbart? I thought he was still dead.

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Some dumb kid must have said his name 3 times in a darkened bathroom mirror

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Shit! There's a specific methodology for that, involving vodka and piles of blow. I thought we destroyed all the documents, but some asshole must have put one up on the web.

Doktor StrangeZoom March 18, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Seems everything is funny to you, Wonket

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 6:02 pm

This is turning into a shameful episode in our history.

imissopus March 18, 2012 at 4:00 pm

Oooo, someone needs his/her satire meter adjusted. I like that there is a #stopwonkette hashtag now, though. Let's get that trending up. Free publicity!

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 5:35 pm

Leave Michelle ALOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNEEEEEEE!!!1!!!111!

HistoriCat March 18, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Firedoglake or Daily Kos commenter? Or one of those lone wolves tweeting out into the sky?

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 10:06 pm

I had an abcessed wisdom tooth once, and it was a real pain in the ass. I guess history does itself.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 1:20 am

Who?

Sharkey March 18, 2012 at 2:58 pm

"Is this the line for the free birth control?"

Schmegeg March 18, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Hey Hey, LBJ, how many tenured professors have you matriculated today?

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 10:09 pm

Ho, Ho, Harvard Yard, how many honkies are retamentally challenged?

BarackMyWorld March 18, 2012 at 3:10 pm

These conservative "journalists" suck more at busting people than Phineas and Ferb's sister.

gurukalehuru March 18, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Candace. And you're right.

BarackMyWorld March 18, 2012 at 6:10 pm

I know her name, but if I'd just put "Candace" people would've been all "are you talking about Phineas and Ferb's sister?"

Jeffrey Grant, DVM March 18, 2012 at 3:12 pm

There you have it: Apparently "sitting" is a violent and rebellious act if done while black

flamingpdog March 18, 2012 at 10:11 pm

It was at lunch counters in the South in the 50s and 60s.

GreatChristiano March 18, 2012 at 3:14 pm

So they are saying it will ENHANCE their education by hiring less-qualified applicants by using race as preference?

Wow, USC is elitist???

commiegirl March 18, 2012 at 4:17 pm

College is Elitist. Graduate school gets you sent straight to the camps.

GreatChristiano March 18, 2012 at 7:21 pm

Yikes! What would TEACHING at a university get one, then?

Liberalizing the future liberals…

GreatChristiano March 18, 2012 at 4:06 pm

My goodness I certainly wouldn't want to be her for a variety of reasons…

Exhausted66 March 18, 2012 at 4:12 pm

Learning While Black
What's next?

Doktor StrangeZoom March 18, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Golly, I wonder if anyone in the Daily Collar comments will call her a "Wookiee"? Because that NEVER gets old!

Rotundo_ March 18, 2012 at 5:09 pm

Comedy gold from a bunch whose most feminine conquest was inflatable.

ttommyunger March 18, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Demonstrating? In College? The noive! Why, I oughtta……..Pssst. Tucker, your tampon string is showing.

horsedreamer_1 March 18, 2012 at 6:11 pm

The Right is gobsmacked that one of "those" people has so few, if any, skeletons in his closet. I mean, even their favoured Negro, Clarence "Coca-Cola Pubis" Thomas*, was dirty. Why no Obama shadiness, then?

*Push meets shove, even the most ardent partisan would admit CT is a goon, but as with, later, Diaper-Dandy Dave Vitter, there is policy agreement, so the personal unpleasantness can be forgiven.

GreatChristiano March 18, 2012 at 7:59 pm

Please correct me if I'm wrong,

but isn't that just liberals being liberals?

ElPinche March 18, 2012 at 11:10 pm

Michelle Obama is the Devil!!!1!!

Chet Kincaid March 19, 2012 at 12:20 am

We wonder if Buzzfeed-approved reporter Boyle also told the White House that if they did not respond, he would consider that a confirmation that Michelle Obama bakes the blood of Christian children into her matzo brei?

Silly, Michelle doesn't have to bake Jewish Anti-Christ bread herself. She can just call up her cousin and order some.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/05/magazine/05rabb
Funny capers, indeed.

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 12:29 am

Wait, notorius crime boss Whitey Bulger and Michelle Obama are related?

Boys, get me my chalkboard. Daddy's got some work to do…

Negropolis March 19, 2012 at 12:50 am

Weren't the 80's great?

BTW, they must realize that old videos of famous people are like catnip to the majority of Americans of any political stripe, right? I honestly don't see how they think showing old vaguely (?) controversial videos of current celebrities pushes away as many people from their argument as it gains us. Most people are going to click this shit for no other reason than to see if they can spot Michelle, and then see how she looked back then. lol

DahBoner March 19, 2012 at 12:40 pm

If Liberals had their own Drudge…

BOW-TIED BOY POOPS BURNING WHITE KKK-ROSSES!!!!

BerkeleyBear March 18, 2012 at 3:50 pm

Well, for blahs back then, being native born was the one thing they had over any white trash like the Micks. So yeah, those could be fighting words.

The most hilarious example of the phenomenon that whiteness is a mindset as much or more than a true racial issue (in a truly horrible way) was how under Apartheid they actually had classifications of honorary white for good Asians who acted the part.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 5:38 pm

WAS IT OVER WHEN THE GERMANS BOMBED PEARL HARBOR!?!!

horsedreamer_1 March 18, 2012 at 5:55 pm

& Patty Duke & her mixed race Hobbit son are — Teatards!

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 6:32 pm

I'm glad someone is taking “voluntary deportation” seriously.

Jukesgrrl March 18, 2012 at 6:35 pm

My college cuisine was created in a popcorn popper.I guess we are both outing ourselves as pre-microwave.

C_R_Eature March 18, 2012 at 6:39 pm

Even the Longest Journey begins with a single Step Voluntary Deportation.

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