barely legal

Rad Dude James O’Keefe Releases Shocking Video Expose of People Doing Legal Stuff

Big DaddyTake out your wallet, Tim Geithner, and send nice Breitbart protege James O’Keefe all your money at once! Young master O’Keefe has really upped his game this time, and is currently doing the Lord’s Work exposing murderous African dictators nice Vermont poll workers who don’t ask him for ID, because that is not the law there. OUTRAGE! TEARING OF HAIR AND GNASHING OF TEETH! How dare these Communist Socialist Kenyan Vermonter poll workers just totally follow the law? What is even going on here, SHEEPLE! More importantly, what will O’Keefe expose next?
* People writing checks at the grocery store.
* Dads who take the kids to school instead of the moms.
* Somebody watching HBO instead of TV.
*People not being total dicks.
Your turn (and better, we hope), plus WORLD-CHANGING video, after the jump!

[YouTube]

About the author

Rebecca is the editor and publisher of Wonkette. She is the author of Commie Girl in the O.C., a collection of her OC Weekly columns, and the former editor of LA CityBeat. Go visit her Commie Girl Collective, and follow her on the Twitter!

View all articles by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Comments

Hey there, Wonkeputians! Shypixel here to remind you to remember our Commenting Rules For Radicals, Enjoy!

  • nounverb911

    I thought they buried him with Breitbart two weeks ago.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Shit floats.

    • SorosBot

      Or at least his career – what's he gonna do now without his sugar daddy's resources?

      • Lascauxcaveman

        Ha, are you kidding? Having Breibart outta the way just moves him up one rung closer to direct access to that sweet Koch slushfund. If he wasn't such a little chickenshit, I'd have said O'Keefe took out ol' Bitpart himself.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          I bet he had the assassination videotaped, tho.

          • SorosBot

            And then edited to look like a black woman did it.

          • Loaded_Pants

            Probably Michelle O….now that's the real video that will bring down Obama.

    • dadanarchist

      The little bitch escaped when they were pouring the vodka on to the funeral pyre.

    • Doktor StrangeZoom

      I'd have assumed Breitbart would have insisted on something similar to the arrangement for Mr. Burns.

    • ElPinche

      Coroner removes all buttplugs before burial.

  • SorosBot

    Psst, O'Keefe, you need to learn some Latin; Veritas actually means truth, the exact opposite of your pathetic project does.

    • beavertank

      But truth is relative!

      …except when it comes to religion. Or abortion. Those are absolute and literal.

      • http://wonkette.com/ weej_bain

        incestuous, too, also

      • SorosBot

        Or in physics, at least according to Conservapedia, which exposed how Einstein's theory was a liberal plot:
        http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/08

        • Chichikovovich

          You know who else rejected Einstein's theory as the product of non-Christian thinking?

          • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

            Truman?

          • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

            Infinite win.

          • SorosBot

            I do seem to recall something about the Einstein family having to flee in the middle of the night, abandoning everything they owned, but can't recall from whom…

          • BaldarTFlagass

            Werner Heisenberg?

          • http://littlegreenfootballs.com/article/39308_Breitbarts_Fans_Spew_Racism_Call_for_President_Obama_t glamourdammerung

            Well, they do say that you never know where he is at and how fast he is coming for you at the same time.

          • Chichikovovich

            You got me. Though maybe they had some connection to these people:
            http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deutsche_Physik

          • doloras

            Werner von Braun?

          • GOPCrusher

            Sheldon Cooper's Mom?

          • http://dismalpseudoscientist.wordpress.com Deportably_Jose
  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Next O'Keefe expose: People cheating on their *golf scores*

    Film at fornever….

    • beavertank

      And after that he takes on: People failing to tip adequately.

      The shock. The outrage!

      • SorosBot

        These are right-wingers; their expose would be on people tipping "too much" – which would probably even include below adequate tips; they probably think anything over 5% was more than those waitstaff peons deserve.

        • Chichikovovich

          Maybe the wingnut who wrote the defense of Scrooge can put pen to paper for Mr. Pink.

      • Veritas78

        Tipping is un-American. Remember that Barbara Bush never tipped: "I don't believe in it," were her words.

    • Tundra Grifter

      If he wants to do the world some actual good, film those jerks with a couple of dozen items in their basket try to sneak through the "12 Items or Less" grocery store checkout.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        Step On A Crack: Liberals Break Their Mommas' Backs!

    • GOPCrusher

      Electricity: Liberal plot to promote Atheism.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    Yea, but the little shit clawed his way out of the shackles.

  • HempDogbane

    Hey, I already watched the Palin video. Wonkette video quota is 1 per month.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      You got ID, please? If you watched a video, you need ID

  • Ruhe

    Some guys will do anything to get some. I respect that.

    • Arken

      But he's already a pimp!

      • bikerlaureate

        Well, it is hard out there.

  • gullywompr

    Breitbart thought he had all the dirt on liberals, but now the dirt's on him.

    • GOPCrusher

      Huzzah!

  • Schmannnity

    They even let Socialists vote in Vermont.

    • Fare la Volpe

      And the Italians!!

  • edywin2

    People not wearing sunglasses indoors.
    People that are not embellishing any random act for profit
    People who think Project Veritas is a hair product for Baby Boomers.

  • Terry

    Why isn't O'Keefe in jail?

    • Fare la Volpe

      When you're a rich white kid with a rich white daddy who is a rich white defense attorney in a state with a documented bias in favor of rich white people….well, you get my point.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      You need ID to get taken in.

  • Callyson

    Ten minutes? I'm supposed to spend ten minutes watching this video?
    Or, I can spend those ten minutes on a quick masturbation break from the news…
    …brb…

  • Baconzgood

    No way! I'm not going to click on anything by him because it will show a "Hit" and only encourage him.

  • http://Wonkette.com DemmeFatale

    Is that not a face just begging to be punched?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      He makes me feel all stabby.

    • prommie

      Repeatedly.

    • Fare la Volpe

      And his eye sockets are just the right size, ifyaknowwhatImean.

      Of course I mean for glasses.

      • Lascauxcaveman

        LOL, I skullfucked upfisted your comment.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        His cheekbones look a little too sharp for my balls. I'd probably want to tape molefoam there.

        What?

    • dadanarchist

      His career trajectory suggests that a serious face punching is only a matter of when, not if.

    • SorosBot

      And are those not balls just begging to be kicked? (repeatedly also, prommie).

      • dadanarchist

        Tasered

    • elviouslyqueer

      Preferably and repeatedly with a rock hard penis.

    • GOPCrusher

      I know we aren't supposed to wish death on anyone anymore on Wonkette, but how about near fatal throat punching?

  • Lucidamente1

    Needs moar Abbie Boudreau.

  • CogitoErgoBibo

    I tried. After hearing the douchey kid pronounce "Mohamud" about twenty billion times in a way that sounds as if he's clearing his throat, I know for a fact I will not survive all 10 minutes and 9 seconds of that video. Nope. Can't do it.

    • KeepFnThatChicken

      "Mo*GACKLE*-amood"

      what a dick.

  • DaRooster

    So the Wiki says he is a resident of New Jersey… He should be arrested for voter fraud.

    • James Michael Curley

      More evidence of the tragedy caused by indiscriminate dumping of toxic waste.

      • prommie

        Or the tragedy of Rutgers' admission standards.

  • philpjfry

    Married people having sex for fun………wait that's not funny. that might happen

  • http://wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    Why can't he do an expose on why many US American's can't wash their hands after going to the bathroom?

    • Lascauxcaveman

      60 Minutes and Inside Edition have both already done that one. And TMZ is working on the celebrity version of it.

      Meanwhile CBS has optioned Survivor: Public Restroom for the 2013 season.

      • Generation[redacted]

        Seinfeld broke this case wide open years ago.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      He'd be too tempted by the wide stance of the stalls.

    • Loaded_Pants

      Because he doesn't do it himself.

  • edgydrifter

    James O'Keefe: Bullied too much in school, or not bullied enough?

    • DaRooster

      Yes!

      The odd thing is he was probably bullied by (R)epugnant kids… I guess he is still trying to make them like him.

    • LabRodent

      Oh he pretty much lived in a locker in High School.

    • katamaran24

      No matter how much, it wasn't enough. Someone should find the kids who bullied the little crap weasel, tell them where he lives, and supply them with rubber hoses and updated wedgie instructions.

      • doloras

        So. You think bullying someone in school makes them a better person? I think a lot of people do, secretly, and that's why we have this "pro-bully" lobby.

    • Trinket

      He is a giant retard who needs to be forced to eat a sack of dicks. What else I am I supposed to not say?

  • http://wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    Rebecca:

    Surely you can relax those rules just this once.

    • memzilla

      How maniacally twisted is our Editrix, constantly presenting articles about people who are just begging to have the R-word appended to them… appended, with extreme prejudice.

      • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

        She puts the "tricks" in "editrix"

        If you know what I mean.

        And I think you do.

  • http://wonkette.com/ Sharkey

    People who double-dip their chips.

  • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

    Amazing! Astonishing! Incredible! By that I mean, that someone would go to the trouble to commit voter fraud in Vermont. I lived there and, basically, the Democrat wins almost every time. So fraud ain't gonna get ya much.

    Meanwhile, the right wing meme that you need ID for all these other extra-Constitutional purposes is getting a little tiresome. You need an ID to buy a beer. You need an ID to get on a plane. You need an ID to get arrested. Let's apply that reasoning to some other areas of life:

    – You must present ID before entering a church. After all, you need an ID to buy Sudafed.
    – You must have ID before mailing a letter. After all, you need an ID to take out a loan.
    – You must show ID to buy condoms. After all, you need an ID and an ultrasound and consent form and permission slip and cash to get an abortion.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      It's breathtaking how quickly they gloss over the fact that all those are voluntary acts but the right to vote is in the goddamned CONSTITUTION

      When they write an amendment protecting my right to take a flight to Dubuque, they can raise that issue.

      • Naked_Bunny

        Not having to show an ID only counts if it's the second amendment.

        P.S. Gun violence is an actual problem.

    • Chichikovovich

      You must present ID before entering a church. After all, you need an ID to buy Sudafed.

      Ooooh – I like that one. Follow up: "Are you saying that buying Sudafed is a more significant matter than being in the presence of the Lord?"

  • smashedinhat

    Hasn't he violated his probation yet? I mean, seriously!

    • memzilla

      In Soviet Union, probation violates you.

    • http://www.marionstein.net MarionNYNY

      You would think committing voter fraud would be a violation, wouldn't you?

  • memzilla

    Read the comments on this article at Breitbart for some larfs. I wish we libtard Marxist muslin socialist fascists had a tenth as much power as they think we do.

  • James Michael Curley

    This fart went from New Jersey all the way to Vermont to find out one does not need to show an ID to vote. That is the law in New jersey.

    • prommie

      Vote fraud is easy, but its also hugely labor-intensive, and you do just as well with GOTV, so why bother, what with, you know, the chance of prosecution and jail?

      • James Michael Curley

        Vvoter fraud sometimes can be quite easy. Before NJ changed from the old style lever machines to the current machines, poll workers looked at the tabulation wheels and entered the number on a tabulation sheet.I lost an election by 20 something votes. There were nine voting districts and I averaged 325 (if I remember correctly) voters in each of districts 2 through 8. The tabulation sheet for district 1 said I got 3 votes. By the time the tabulation sheets (back then) were compiled the machines were locked up and could only be opened by a county or state official. Everyone wanted me to contest the election but I would have had to file a bond to begin with and merely plunking my money down for a couple weeks (and loosing the bond fee) was the start of a process which required preparing formal legalese style documents to present a reasonable cause argument to haul all the machines out of storage and re-examine them.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          That's not votER fraud. That's vote fraud. ID wouldn't have changed a bad count.

        • http://Wonkette.com DemmeFatale

          I worked on an election in NY, and we only won by 25 votes (a primary that decided the election).
          The contesting process was heartbreaking. When the machines, (old style lever), were hauled out of storage, they shook and shuddered and we couldn't all help noticing that they could have changed just from being moved. We crossed referenced the machines with the sign in sheets. I was examining the sheets with our opponent's husband, who saw who did and did not vote in his home town. He was shocked at how many friends said they voted, but actually had not. They could have made the difference.

          • James Michael Curley

            Been there – done that. But my guy (woman) lost. In NJ even a challenger cannot examine the books on Election Day and not until they are returned to the county Board of Elections and released by the Commissioner of Elections. The ‘challenger’ is expected to acquire all the info s/he needs just by sitting there and listening. Violations do occur. I once talked a poll worker into allowing me to get a photo copy of a page and by the time he went to the school’s office and returned with the book there was about a dozen people on line.Back on Topic so the banhammer don’t come down: What passes for alleged voter fraud in the weasel, infested minds of people like O’Keefe, Faux news and the Republican legislatures passing voter ID laws are completely inadequate to really swing an election.

    • Fare la Volpe

      He am smrat.

  • Baconzgood

    FUCK! I did click it. I like this comment at the top

    "Let me get this straight…..you'll get arrested if you ask for a beer or hotel room without ID, but if you go to vote for our leaders that eventually create national policy that we all have to live under, there is no ID needed? Is it any wonder that other countries think we are a bunch of stupid American morons?" Let's just take this step by step:

    1) You won't get arrested if you ask for a beer without ID. I've recived beer without producing ID many times. In fact, after I turned 28, I get a beer 10X more with out producing than being asked for ID.

    • Baconzgood

      2) If you don't produce ID for a hotel room you won't get arrested. You just won't get a hotel room. Actually, speaking from experience, if you make a little loud noise the manager WILL give you a hotel room without producing ID to shut you up.

      3) Other countries think "we" are morons because the "we" you're a part of have that kind of logic. So of course they think "we" (you and your friends) are morons. YOU FUCKING ARE!!!!!!!!

      • Lascauxcaveman

        As probably the only hotel operator in these forums, I can assure you that you most certainly will get a hotel room w/o ID, if the there's no problem with the credit card you're using. (ie; the only time I bother asking for ID is if there is no signature on the card, or it looks different from the signature you sign the cc charge with. )

        • Doktor StrangeZoom

          You're a hotelier? No wonder your comments always have such a hostel tone.

      • boobookitteh

        I've heard tell that there exist hotels that not only will give you a room wihtout ID, but let you pay cash so there is no record at all of your visit.

        I'm sure Republicans know nothing about such things, however.

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          They usually ask for the license plate of your vehicle, however.

          A friend told me

          • boobookitteh

            I wouldn't know.

            /I make the guy pay.

    • SorosBot

      And they are putting the onus on the voter – we're talking about one of our most basic rights, yet they are treating it like it should be as hard as possible to do, the exact opposite of what a true democracy should do. The vile shit-eating cocksuckers.

      • UnholyMoses

        And that's the issue: These dickfaces are convinced that voting is, and should always be, a privilege. Not a right granted to all citizens, but a privilege that only those who tend to vote for the GOP should be granted.

        The reason these clowns cry about "ORIGINAL INTENT!" all the time is because they truly think some group of Superior White Guys should decide who is in the Senate, and that only white, land-owning males should be able to vote for anything else. Because Those Others are just too naive to make those decisions.

        • HistoriCat

          The thing I love about the Original Intent line is that most of the losers who are whining the most are the kind of idiots the Founders feared would vote. Women? Negroes? Not on their radar. Dumbshits who could easily be led with some stupid slogans – that was their fear.

      • Doktor StrangeZoom

        [spittle-flecked screaming voice] IT'S NOT A DEMOCRACY IT'S A REPUBLIC AND IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE YOUR GOING TO HELL

  • memzilla

    Say, Keefe-For-Brains: isn't subverting the constitutionally-protected voting process a Federal crime? Shouldn't you be at the USS Graybar Hotel for that, making big rocks into little rocks?

  • neiltheblaze

    Before it's all over we're going to find that Andy Breitbart was actually a restraining influence on these jerkoffs. A voice of reason, even.

    • proudgrampa

      Jeez, don't talk scary like that!

    • CogitoErgoBibo

      OMG. That actually makes a twisted sort of sense. Baby Jeebus help us all.

  • chascates

    "Hello, my name is Abraham Lincoln. I'd like a voting ballot, please."
    Sure, here you go.

    "Hi, I'm Adolf Hitler. Give me mein ballot, bitte."
    Heil, Fuhrer.

    "I'm an retired school nurse who is black and low income. May I have a ballot please?"
    GET OUT OF HERE, YOU COMMIE SCUM!!! NO VOTER FRAUD HERE!

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "* People writing checks at the grocery store."

    Yeah, but in the express lane!!!

    • Naked_Bunny

      Grocery stores still take checks?

      • http://wonkette.com/ Sharkey

        You have to show ID!!!!!

    • Lascauxcaveman

      The death penalty is too good for those folks.

    • Veritas78

      Or fishing through a change purse for pennies so they can pay with exact change. By the way, this is done overwhelmingly by women, mainly because men don't generally carry change purses.

      Which is why they should be fired for using contraception.

  • beavertank

    I bet they only ever take pennies from the "take a penny, leave a penny" dish too.

    Thievery!

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      Halloween candy: welfare for kids?

      (actually, I think Althouse already did that expose, but it was a written column and O'Keefe makes videos for people too stoopit to read)

      • Fare la Volpe

        They've already exposed how Halloween is a holiday heralding Satan, and "most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches."

        http://www.charismamag.com/index.php/prophetic-in

        (This writer is dead serious too; What is wrong with these people?)

        • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

          Holy fuck and I was kidding…

        • Loaded_Pants

          <obvious candy corn joke>

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    He should do the Muslim gag and try getting into a NASCAR event or a gun show.

    Check health insurance first, though.

    • GOPCrusher

      Do like on Jackass and Super Glue pubic hair on his face to make the beard.

  • EatsBabyDingos

    Encyclopedia Brittanica is no longer making book encyclopedias, but they are getting into a "Scratch and Sniff" book for the deaf and blind. "Butthole" smells like O"Keefe.

  • KeepFnThatChicken

    Maybe this is false equivalency, but are there any complaints about his obfuscation?

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      You use big words.

      You got ID?

  • http://johnnyzhivago.blogspot.com johnnyzhivago

    I bet the swarmy twerp would get carded if he tried to buy a beer or a can of spray paint at Walmart. He looks about 14 years old.

  • ChernobylSoup

    FEMA camps for people who write checks at grocery stores!

  • Barrelhse

    Now you got me goin. brb

  • Oblios_Cap

    currently doing the Lord’s Work

    Probably Lord Voltemort's. Possibly Lord Vader's, too.

    • paulabflat

      is it true that there are only two (2) sith at any one time. a master and an apprentice? since breitbart's dead, is o'keefe not now the master?

      i think we're safe.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Nice try, Rebecca, but there is not enough tequila in this hemisphere to make me click that video.

    What? IT NEEDED SAYING.

  • proudgrampa

    Now THERE'S an issue the candidates should be debating, not crap that was decided ages ago.

  • joshleefolsom

    Excellent description and analysis of all the flaws in this chowderhead's project: http://crooksandliars.com/karoli/james-okeefe-tak

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Voting right are protected by the Constitution. Buying a beer, getting a hotel room or renting a car aren't.

    Buying a beer, etc. is a commercial transaction. Voting is a right one has as a citizen.

    Strange these people don't understand the difference–almost as if they have been paid to act stupid, although Faux News anchors are naturally stupid.

  • Blueb4sunrise

    I am going to make a prediction: Someday, this O'Keefe tick-dick is going to stumble onto a bit of information that is actually important and true, follow it, and produce a piece of journalism.

    I have not been drinking this morning.

    • annettaj

      . . . .and no one will believe it because he is a slimy piece of fecal matter.

    • Trinket

      I predict that he will got to jail for something way before that ever happens.

      I myself HAVE been drinking, so this is probably just wishful thinking.

  • Jus_Wonderin

    I am not sure if our new rules allow me to call O'Keefe a dick. If not, I won't do it.

  • commiegirl

    Actually, I've "interviewed" (got drinks from) many bartenders at gop conventions, and they all say it's only Young Republicans who tip like shit. Old Republicans tip like ballers.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Probably because their 401ks are the size of small European countries.

      When you have money like that, giving an extra gratuity to the bottle jockey is chump change. It's too bad the born-on-third brats don't get that yet.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    I worked for a living, man and boy. I've done every kind of labor from blue-collar manual to white collar executive. I know what it means to sweat until you get home to shower and collapse in bed.

    I tip really nicely. My base is 20% and even if I get shitty service, I leave at least 15%. Why? Because I don't know these people from Adam but I do know they work at sub-minimum wage jobs trying to perform a service for me. I don't consider a tip as part of their compensation but as my acknowledgement that they saved me from having to hunt and gather my own food.

    • Fare la Volpe

      I tip like a mother fuck for those poor schmucks who work at the cafe across from my office. I gave the haggard coffee girl a 30% tip on my cookie and drink because she had a line out the door behind me.

      If it made her day just a tiny bit better, it was worth it.

  • bfstevie

    Nice use of the same footage multiple times to make a little bag of shit into a giant size bag of shit. It's like watching reality TV shows about storage locker auctions, but not nearly as compelling. I'm looking forward to the video of this guy making new friends in prison when some gumint entity actually has the balls to prosecute him for criminal acts.

    • GOPCrusher

      New episode for MSNBC. Lockdown: James O'Keefe-Prison Rape Victim

  • UnholyMoses

    Well, I'm a guy who does the family's laundry and cleans the bathrooms and kitchen.

    And since The Mrs dusts and vacuums (and cooks like a master chef), that means we're distributing the labor and OHMYGODWE'REGODLESSCOMMIELIBERALFASCISTASTICEVILDOERS!!!11!!!!11

    We will turn ourselves into the Notvery Brietblart Police IMMEDIATELY!

  • fitley

    I can just imagine O'Queef and his buddies high fiving each other and yelling
    "This one is for you Andrew. Woof, Woof". And then they get in a circle and jerk each other off. Woof Woof. The end.

  • spareme

    Why didn't his mother eat him at birth?

  • http://wonkette.com/ outragedcitizen

    Every time I see that snotty, white jerk dressed up like a pimp, I wish I could dump him on a corner in Southeast DC just to see how long he can go before someone shoves that video camera up his ass.

  • snoopyfan2010

    Being able to drink is not a right so not being able to get an ID is irrelevant. The issue is that someone who is poor has a right to vote so not being able to get an ID puts an unecessary obstacle on exercising a right.

    But hey everyone HE knows has an ID so any comments to the contrary must be wrong.

  • Generation[redacted]

    I watched the first 0:05 until the nice black screen turned into pictures and annoying voices.

  • ttommyunger

    O'Keefe? I fucking doubt it. O'Queef? Much more like it.