That's MRS. Flotus to you... According to most people, journalism has seen better days, and as an industry/art form/whatever you want to call it, is really just sending reluctant, furloughed editors to set up subscription booths at the nearest Walgreen’s and hoping for the best. But there are still young people in this country who want to see journalism survive as more than just a thing that helps interpret trending Twitter topics for Olds. There are young people like 11-year-old Topanga Sena, who want to ask the tough questions that aren’t being answered – questions like, “If you, First Lady Michelle Obama, had magical powers, what great gift would you bestow upon your Obese Nation?”

Young Topanga is a reporter for the Scholastic News Kids Press Corps, which is apparently some sort of liberal group that allows lady reporters to wear simple orange polos rather than the standard cleavage shirt and clown-hooker makeup. In a new video of Topanga’s February interview with our FLOTUS, she questions the First Lady about the federal government’s control of bake sales, something weighing heavily on the minds of elementary school children everywhere.

Obama told Topanga Sena, a young Scholastic News reporter, that ‘Let’s Move!’ is “not about having government tell people what to do, because government doesn’t have all the answers.”

“I don’t believe in absolute ‘no’s’ to anything, because that wouldn’t make life fun,” Obama told Sena. “What would life be without the bake sale, right?”

Conservative pundits and outlets such as the Drudge Report reported last year that Obama wanted to ban French fries in restaurants after the parent company of Olive Garden and Red Lobster announced that it was working on creating healthier options for its children’s menus. The first lady addressed the controversy by talking about her love of French fries.

Here is that important part of the video where Michelle Obama addresses her love of french fries, and also brags about the elitist (and Muslim and communist) “healthy” fries served at the White House.


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  • BigSkullF*ckingDog

    I love sweet potatoes and I love fries. Sweet potato fries? Not so much.

    • Tundra Grifter

      They yam what they yam.

    • You can serve sweet potato fries with salt and olive oil as a side dish or dust them with cinnamon and sugar for afters. Either way, I love 'em.

    • Au contraire! (Oh merde, my agenda is showing!!)

    • DaRooster

      Try about 1/4 part sweet po in with your Sunday mornin' country fries… just right!!

    • Sweet is the jew of potato fascism.

    • fuflans

      i'm with you big red.

      i do not like french fried sweet yam.

    • Negropolis

      I really want to like them, and have tried them from a number of different establishments, but can't get into them. They've either been completely flavorless (so why not just have plain fries, then), or really gummy.

  • Tundra Grifter

    "Topanga?" I don't want to dog an 11-year old kid, and it certainly isn't a child's fault this is the name her parents selected, but are daughters these days being named after famous canyons?

    Are there so many people on the fact of this earth we've flat out run out of names?

    Who knew?

    • metamarcisf

      Director Ron Howard named his daughter after one of those Utah national parks…

      • Tundra Grifter


      • BaldarTFlagass

        Goosenecks of the San Juan Howard? Oh, wait, that's a state park.

      • Zion?

    • BaldarTFlagass

      I was always partial to Christy Canyon, myself. But she was of legal age.

    • coolhandnuke

      The world needz more Fjords.

      • Isyaignert

        Ha! Good one!!

      • Because fjords need no bailing out.

        HAH! I crack me up…

    • usernameguy

      That, or the parents are big fans of Boy Meets World.

    • Actually, I think Topanga is a very pretty name. Then again, I like Bristol, Willow and Piper, too. The names, I mean.

      • Tundra Grifter


        You are, of course, quite correct. It is a pretty name.

        Bristol and Piper I'm not so wild about. Willow is nice enough. If you're a tree.

        • HistoriCat

          Willow is nice enough. If you're a tree

          How about if you're a witch?

          • SorosBot

            A lesbian Jewish science nerd witch – can't believe Sarah named her kid after one of those.

          • redarmyzombie

            And the Nelwyns, don't forget them!

          • horsedreamer_1

            Warwick Davies Libel?

          • Or a small person in a Spielberg film?

          • Tundra Grifter

            For a witch, I'm more in favor of Fauna or Flora. Or Merryweather.

      • SoBeach

        I get a kick out of the crazy names certain ethnic groups come up with for their children. Whenever you read about a "Hunter", a "Dylan", a "Sierra", or a "Courtney" getting busted you just know what neighborhood they came from.

        • BaldarTFlagass

          Mama, bury my heart at the trailer park.

        • Tundra Grifter


          A friend of mine met a couple with a baby named "Cutty." When asked about it, they responded "Yes – her name is Cutty Sark. That's what we were bombed on the night she was conceived."

          Some years later I met a gentleman with a son named Hennessy.

          I didn't ask…

          • That's like the commercial where the kids are named Colorado, California and Dodge.

          • Tundra Grifter


            That reminds me of the scene from the great movie "Blue Collar" where Richard Pryor tries to convince an IRS agent all his deductions for numerous dependents are legitimate and introduces the kids from the neighborhood as his.

            "This is Malcolm X. Brown, this is Martin Luther King, Jr., Brown, this is H. Rap Brown…"

        • metamarcisf

          That goes double for Bryce Dallas Howard

  • BaldarTFlagass

    "Sweet" potatoes implies the presence of sugar. Well, high fructose corn syrup, anyway.

    • So we can call the FLOTUS "sweet potato tits"?

  • French Fry libel!

  • I see the First Lady is wearing the Ceremonial Hoodie.

  • LabRodent

    Give me Freedom Fries or give me death.

  • FLOTUS: “What would life be without the bake sale, right?”

    I was waiting for the good part, when this "Let's Move!" champion got them on their feet to preach the good news of the "Shake N' Bake Sale." Raising those needed school funds with the passion of a thousand line-dancers and sending donors home with a high-carb treat for their hard booty-shaking work.

  • Callyson

    Toss cut up sweet potatoes with about a teaspoon of olive oil and some red pepper flakes.
    Cook for about 15 minutes at 425 degrees, tossing once.
    Suck it, haters.

    • MissTaken


      Also, instead of red pepper flakes, I like them with cinnamon. Mmm.

    • Isyaignert

      Ever had them with a maple syrup- based dipping sauce? VG!

    • Beat me to it.
      And I waited way, way too long to get around to trying it, like just last year; so if anyone else out there is tired of cooking regular potatoes at home? this is the way to go.

      • I'm a man. What is this "cook" of which you speak?

        • I'm a man. What… "cook"…?

          Of course! I forget myself.
          For *everyone's* clarification — not just you actor_:
          I included the "at-home" only b/c, although (around here, in the local-owned eateries) you can add an order of sweet potato fries, it's between $2.50-$4.00 and usually loaded with excess salt/sugar and oil. Making them at home trumps dined-out in all three categories: flavor, cost-savings, and so freakin' easy, esp. if you line the tray w/ foil then just toss afterward, no cleanup.

    • Yes!

    • DCBloom

      I like them with a little curry powder

    • shebeers

      Chipotle powder or cumin is tasty too.

  • LiveToServeYa

    Fuck conservative pundits. Only the virulent, racist, know-nothing right could drum up shit against trying to improve people's eating habits.

  • elviouslyqueer

    Conservative pundits and outlets such as the Drudge Report reported last year that Obama wanted to ban French fries in restaurants

    Wait, wait, wait. I'm confused. Was this before or after Andrew Breitbart discovered Matt having sexytime fantasies about fellating Barry?

  • Blueb4sunrise

    YAMS ARE NOT SWEET POTATOES!! WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111

    • Just ask Karen Finley! She wouldnt be nearly so famous for smearing sweet potatoes on her naked body.

  • Baconzgood

    Off topic.

    HOOOOOORAY FOR PA!!!!!!!!!

    • SorosBot

      Yay, I get free benzene in my drinking water now!

    • fuflans

      rick santorum sheds a tear of pride.

  • Beowoof

    Sweet potato fries are just are trick from liberals to get kids to eat healthy socialist food. Don't fall for it,make sure you and the kids get real lard fried American freedom fries.

    • ChessieNefercat

      So down the road, you can watch your your little Hutts waddle off to war.

  • Stop fry-pandering, Mrs. Soweto!! You're still not an American!1!!

    • UW8316154

      You know, before she was Mrs. Soweto, her name was Michelle Robinson. Weird.

      • BaldarTFlagass

        Koo koo ka choo

        (Simon and Garfunkel, not Beatles)

  • SorosBot

    As someone who really dislikes sweet potatoes, I'll say no thanks; give me my salty regular old fries instead.

    • Lotsa folks thought they wouldn't like the buttsecks either, til they tried it. After that, they just said they didn't like it.

      • SorosBot

        But I have tried them! The sweet potatoes, not the assfucking, that is. And I didn't like it.

        • Did you use butter? That could help.

          • memzilla

            That was one obscure "Last Tango In Paris" reference there, Mr. K.

          • Not really, somebody else mentioned it here within the last day or two.

        • You've never done buttsecks?

          Wow. Dude. I can get a line started around the block here for ya!

          Oh, wait…I mean, you'd be catcher, so put that thing away…

      • Tundra Grifter


        It's an acquired taste – like Scotch and asparagus.

        Especially if you're gettin' and not givin'.

        • Wait a minute, what exactly are you doing with the yams?!

        • I'd just as soon not have scotch and asparagus inserted there.

          Scotch or asparagus, maybe.

    • Hear hear! Even if it's poutine, it's better than sweet potato fries!

  • FakaktaSouth

    Apparently the end goal of everything you do as a Republican has to be about getting fat.
    Sex for pregnancy, food for obesity, got it.

  • MissTaken

    Eat too many sweet potatoes you'll turn orange, like Boehner. Just a warning.

    • SorosBot

      And here I thought that was the whiskey.

    • Boehner's lovely glow comes from sauteeing his liver in Cointreau.

  • vulpes82

    History's greatest monster.

  • dadanarchist

    "Fucking elitist."

    "Wait, aren't sweet potatoes a big part of Southern cuisine."

    "Fuck you, elitist. Roll Tide!!!!"

  • So lemme get this straight: two restaurant chains, perhaps under coercion from the administration, but more likely making a decision based on focus groups and surveys that indicate they'd get more customers if they didn't turn kids into walking buttermilk, decide to serve healthier options and somehow, it's Michelle's fault.

    K, got it now.

  • I'd like to think Fox "News" is at least a tiny bit ashamed to be so thoroughly outclassed by the Scholastic News Kids Press Corps, but I'm pretty sure they maintain a "No Shame Zone."

  • MadBrahms

    I bet she serves them to Barack with his mustard burgers. Communists.

    • I heard down at the Abortionplex, they serve sweet potato fries with the "chicken fingers"

      Say, why don't they ever need medical waste disposal at the Abortionplex?

  • Sassomatic

    So does Islam forbid regular potatoes or what's the deal?

  • An_Outhouse

    She could have suggested selling fruit as a money raiser. I used to love it when kids delivered oranges to me in the winter time. I hate the shit kids make nowadays – some crap mix they got at a store, open up, and add water to Who knows what else they threw in it.

  • Redhead

    Sweet potato fries are the shiznit and I question the humanity of anyone who says otherwise.

  • ChessieNefercat

    If our dear FLOTUS suggested that scraping the grass clippings and dog poo off the bottom of my lawn mower and and boiling them up with toilet tank water would make a tasty and nutritious drink, I would give it a try.

    Oh, and I found that sweet potato fries were fine once I learned to appreciate them for what they are instead of chomping on them while sullenly telling myself, no, they are not real fries.

  • zedbot

    I'm with the delectable FLOTUS…sweet potato fries rock. Also, elitist mustard mixed with a bit of mayo to dip them in.

  • fuflans

    michelle and her fancy food can keep running decoy with the wingtards for as long as it takes mitt to lose in november.

  • Toomush_Infer

    Sweet potato fries in bed with Michelle – delicious!…

  • ttommyunger

    Fap, fap, fap…..

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