HOOF IN MOUTH SYNDROME  11:50 am March 9, 2012

Palin: Obama Seems To Want To Go Back To The Days Of Slavery

by Liz Colville

yes so true.

Sarah Palin went on Heinity on Thursday to do some sort of to-the-core-of-the-earth analysis of something Obama-related, god knows what, but perhaps hugs? (Hannity describes it as a “sort of bit of information,” which is the closest any conservative has come to admitting how flea-sized this incident is.) And the gist was Sean Hannity asking Palin what all “this” “means.” Something something, Obama’s hug of a guy, “class warfare” and attempts to help the broke suggest that the president is “bringing us back” to the era in which blacks were considered to be 3/5 of a person. It’s true, this — wanting equality, supporting others who do — is a true replica of slavery, you can’t even tell the two apart.

Some of the exchange:

Hannity: Bleebloopityblahblah?

Palin: He is bringing us back, Sean, to days, uh — you can harken back to days before the Civil War when unfortunately too many Americans mistakenly believed that not all men were created equal.

What a thing. What a day. Palin goes on to say (WARNING: CRAP ENGLISH FOLLOWS):

Palin: And it was the Civil War that began the codification of the truth that here in America, yes we are equal, and we all have equal opportunities, not based on the color of your skin. You have equal opportunity to work hard and to succeed and to embrace the opportunities, god-given opportunities to develop resources, to work extremely hard, and to, as I say, to succeed. Now, it has taken all these years for many Americans to understand that — that gravity, that mistake took place before the Civil War, and why the Civil War, had to really start changing America. What Barack Obama seems to want to do is go back to before those days when we were in different classes based on income, based on color of skin. Why are we allowing our country to move backwards instead of moving forward –

Hannity: Whu–

Palin: — with that understanding that as our charters of liberty spell out for us, that we are all created equally.

Incuriouser and incuriouser! Whatever could this white lady be talking about? That welfare encourages people historically deprived of opportunities to continue to not have them? That rich people are more sensitive than others and poor people should be considerate of that? That health care saves people’s teeth from falling out, which causes them to be too elitist? Please let us know, if you know. [Media Matters]

 
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{ 230 comments }

Barb March 9, 2012 at 11:59 am

She only has 3/5th of a brain.

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Mostly as a counterweight to her ass

Terry March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

I think it's actually more evidence that her mother-in-law must still be selling meth.

BarackMyWorld March 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm
MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:32 pm

At best, she's a cognitive octoroon. Or at least she plays one on TV.

Limeylizzie March 9, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Which makes her a …oops, sorry.

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:37 pm

Dozy cunt?

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm

You are so good at cutting to the chase!

Barb March 9, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Thanks Chet!

ph7 March 9, 2012 at 12:46 pm

Her Reality and the Truth are separate but equal.

Designer_Rants March 9, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Needz moar Jim Crow laws to keep Conservative Reality separate from the Truth.

MegPasadena March 9, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Considering the size of her head, it is amazing how little sign of a brain exists in there.
Oh well, I guess it is all looks.
Could we say tofu or concrete brain?

Chillatte March 9, 2012 at 12:00 pm

I agree. Let's go back to the good ol' days, when Alaska wasn't part of the Union.

nounverb911 March 9, 2012 at 12:05 pm

Do you think Putin wants it back?

Chillatte March 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm

I'm afraid there was an eBay-like No Return Policy back then.

BarackMyWorld March 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

It'd certainly make it easier to rear his head into our airspace.

(I remember people trying to tell me she didn't literally mean Putin flew through Alaska on his way to New York or Washington, D.C. (despite the fact the route from Moscow to the east coast probably doesn't include flying through Siberia and Canada). To say those people really overestimated Palin's grasp of both symbolism and geography is putting it mildly.)

horsedreamer_1 March 9, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Perhaps Putin was doing his homework.

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm

We could sweeten the deal: throw in Arizona

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 3:52 am

"THROW" it in? Fling it in with great force.

Terry March 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm

He'll take it back, then have a photo op where he's standing on the Al-Can Highway at the Canadian border, shirtless and flexing.

nounverb911 March 9, 2012 at 12:00 pm

What's 3/5th of Palin equal?

Generation[redacted] March 9, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Divide by zero error

Pres.Beeblebrox March 9, 2012 at 3:39 pm

OH SHI-

Palin brain implodes into infinity like the house in Poltergeist

ManchuCandidate March 9, 2012 at 12:02 pm

A cow pie.

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:08 pm

"Pal"?

I know, I know… LIN LIBEL!

UnholyMoses March 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm

100% Stupid.

40 or 50 % McShineys March 9, 2012 at 12:31 pm

It's Stupids all the way down.

Guppy March 9, 2012 at 12:32 pm

Christine O'Donnell.

SorosBot March 9, 2012 at 12:47 pm

The bun in one of the kids' ovens.

GOPCrusher March 9, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Snooki?

Generation[redacted] March 9, 2012 at 12:01 pm

needz moar dead breitbart bombshells

FlownOver March 9, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Not often Hannity says something coherent, but in that exchange "Whu–" comes close. By comparison, anyway.

Terry March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Actually, "Whu…" is probably the only appropriate response to what she was spewing.

GOPCrusher March 9, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Certainly was the most intelligent part of that exchange.

Serolf_Divad March 9, 2012 at 12:19 pm

Yeah, but a stopped clock says "whu…" twice a day.

C_R_Eature March 9, 2012 at 12:32 pm

"Whu–" is the only thing I've ever heard Hannity say that hasn't pissed me off.

dyedwool March 9, 2012 at 12:03 pm

Health care libel!

nounverb911 March 9, 2012 at 12:04 pm

"those days when we were in different classes based on income, based on color of skin"
How dare Palin defame Newt's current platform.

Blueb4sunrise March 9, 2012 at 12:05 pm

It's a TRAP!!!
Don't comment!!!!

Crank_Tango March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Now you tell me.

Generation[redacted] March 9, 2012 at 12:33 pm

IT'S A TARD TARP!

ManchuCandidate March 9, 2012 at 12:05 pm

US America History as explained by a Palin:

We the people. Blahblahblahblahblahblah blah blah blah blah Aliens blah blah blah blah Slavery blah blah Negroes blah blah blah WW2 blah blah Hippies blah blah Red Dawn blah blah blah Raygun blah blah Red Dawn Dirty Dancing blah blah blah Mandingo blah blah blah blah Raygun blah blah Iraq did 9/11 blah blah Obamer Palin Palin Dancing with the Stars blah Palin. The end.

Clancy_Pants March 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Mommy. Why is that lady farting out of her mouth?

neiltheblaze March 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Sarah Palin – bringing the same depth and understanding to history as she does to sex education.

Slim_Pickins March 9, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Well she is considered to be the country's leading public intellectual by some segments of American society.

prommie March 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm

Its not a pretty thing when the r******* make an attempt at an ironic analogy.

Blueb4sunrise March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

rapscallion

GemlikeFlame March 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm

Our Sarah seems a trifle confused when it comes to the acceptability of black folk.
http://wonkette.com/453337/best-part-of-palin-boo

Of course, she's also confused about lunch.

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

republican?

Barb March 9, 2012 at 12:21 pm

"refudiated?"

Blueb4sunrise March 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Damnit, you're the best.

Jus_Wonderin March 9, 2012 at 12:54 pm

Ya know, even if I had something to post that was as good as Barb's, and I don't. I could in no way get it posted as fast as she does.

I think Barb has a time dilation device.

Nah, she's just sharp as a tack!!!!

Barb March 9, 2012 at 2:01 pm

That's very sweet, Jus_

flamingpdog March 9, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Barb can be the tack that the nasty co-worker's kid leaves on my office chair any time.

Barb March 9, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Thank you, Blue.

Geminisunmars March 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm

regurgitrant?

bonghitforjesus March 9, 2012 at 12:48 pm

redneck?

Crank_Tango March 9, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Dear Snowkunt,
I am judging you by the content of your character. Also, I am crushing your head.
Sincerely,
Crank

40 or 50 % McShineys March 9, 2012 at 12:42 pm

I am crushing your head with votes, of course!

The original Kids in the Hall reference probably machineguns teh special babbies a little too much.

Maman March 9, 2012 at 1:09 pm

KITH don't have guns. They are Canadian. That is like Americans without the guns.

GOPCrusher March 9, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Canadians don't have murders. They have hunting accidents.

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:42 pm

God beat you to it.

VinnyThePooh March 9, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Head Crusher vs. Face Pincher. A true classic.

fuflans March 10, 2012 at 12:24 am

any kids reference makes me want to, well, kiss you crank.

Chillatte March 9, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Sarah is always finding new creative ways to out-fucktard herself, isn't she?

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm

What Barack Obama seems to want to do is go back to before those days when we were in different classes based on income

Project much, Sarah?

wakkumph March 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm

Man, remember those days, when people were divided according to their income, according to the color of their skin? Man, am I glad that's over. Phew.

NellCote71 March 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm

Oh, god, that hurt to read. Kids, this is your brain. This is your brain scrambled on meth.

WhatTheHeck March 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

What the fuck is this moron talking about? Shut up. You make no sense. Idiot.
Yet, this country deserves her as president with FoxNews acting as her Press Secretary.

qwerty42 March 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

because … uh … soshuliszm? Or is it teh Acornz? Or was it The Hug™? It's very hard to be sure with these folks. Very hard. There is just something about this President that is, somehow, different.

metamarcisf March 9, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Palin's lucky she is portrayed in "Game Change" by Julianne Moore and not Joan Rivers.

BarackMyWorld March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm
metamarcisf March 9, 2012 at 12:17 pm

I love that movie

elviouslyqueer March 9, 2012 at 12:16 pm

Or Phyllis Diller.

Jus_Wonderin March 9, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Dill. Baby. Dill.

Geminisunmars March 9, 2012 at 12:30 pm

There was a time when Lily Tomlin would have been perfect. (One ringy-dingy…)

NewtsChicknNeck March 9, 2012 at 2:52 pm

so this won't break Julianne Moore's streak of consecutive films in which she gets plowed by some dude who is not her husband/boyfriend/lesbian wife?

Barrelhse March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

Sarah, shut your fucking pie-hole. Come back when you have something to say that is based on facts and expressed in literate English (that should keep her busy).
Can we say Drop Dead?

BerkeleyBear March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

So considering people inherently inferior based on gender or race is equivalent to asking fantastically wealthy people, regardless of their background or identity, to pay a slightly higher percentage in taxes if they are fortunate enough to be fantastically wealthy? Unless there's an underlying assumption that no women or minorities ever get rich, I'm not seeing the connection. But then again, I also don't watch any of the paranormal crap on TV, don't believe Fox News is "fair and balanced" and don't give a shit who wins "American Idol" so I may not be the target audience for this comment.

FlownOver March 9, 2012 at 12:21 pm

It's the inward full Hoekstra with 2 1/2 twists. Degree of difficulty 3.8.

Troglodeity March 9, 2012 at 1:41 pm

"So considering people inherently inferior based on gender or race is equivalent to asking fantastically wealthy people, regardless of their background or identity, to pay a slightly higher percentage in taxes if they are fortunate enough to be fantastically wealthy?" Yes. It is EXACTLY THE SAME.

freakishlywrong March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

Can we say twunt?

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

Just not "retwunt"

C_R_Eature March 9, 2012 at 12:42 pm

Can we say "Twat's that Sarah? I Cunt understand you"?

CrankyLttlCamperette March 9, 2012 at 12:50 pm

You have an ear infucktion?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm

Don't you yell at me, you whippersnapper! Ah'm retarred.

BarackMyWorld March 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm

"What Barack Obama seems to want to do is go back to before those days when we were in different classes based on income, based on color of skin."

Um…she knows Obama is black, right?

Blueb4sunrise March 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm

?!!

Generation[redacted] March 9, 2012 at 12:35 pm

Of course not. She doesn't see race, that's how far beyond racism she is. In fact, some of you look Asian to her.

Designer_Rants March 9, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Some of you even look Russian.

HistoriCat March 9, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Not possible – it's the White House.

anniegetyerfun March 9, 2012 at 12:46 pm

If she realized that, she'd have tried to bed him by now.

SenileAgitation March 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm

Once again, she is clear as custard. Her point is by pointing out inequities in the current distribution of wealth, it's as if Obama has forgotten that once people didn't think so very much of the Negro, and didn't go around electing them President, for one thing, so maybe don't bring that up, OK? Because we learned the hard away about succeeding with God and now who wants to go backwards to that broken time, not me for one!

Limeylizzie March 9, 2012 at 12:23 pm

Mmmmmm custard, one of my favourite things in the whole world.

FlownOver March 9, 2012 at 12:41 pm

"Favourite?" Is it Pommie Heritage Week again?

[wink, wink]

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:51 pm

I love it when you pretend to be dumb! It's just as unconvincing as Sarah pretending to be smart!

Puffperney March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

As a long time Civil War history buff; I have to go purge now…

NewtsChicknNeck March 9, 2012 at 2:56 pm

you'll have to forgive Sarah. her alternative adult ed history class just got to the civil war on the syllabus. she's spent the next few public appearances talking about it. a lot.

CommieLibunatic March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE EVEN TALKING ABOUT!?

Sorry, I got nothin' more intelligent to say than the missive above.

flamingpdog March 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm

No snark. I watched this video on teh Wonkette last night (?rerun?). I didn't understand a word she said last night and I still don't understand it. I can't see that she even answered the question Hannity asked her. All this talk about Mittens being a robot, but I think she's the real robot, programmed to answer questions with babbly nonsense, although in this case I think the wires crossed and she answered some other question. Oh well, I have to go out and play in the dirt today – have a gneiss day, fellow masochists!

Barb March 9, 2012 at 12:14 pm

"…..here in America, yes we are equal, and we all have equal opportunities, not based on the color of your skin."

Why does her family get special treatment and government provided health care because Todd is one quarter Yup’ik Eskimo?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:40 pm

Because she deserves it, that's why.

Barb March 9, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Snark free, Fare…
I could be wrong with the math here and welcome a correction. If Todd is 1/4, that would make his daughter 1/8th, and his grandchildren 1/16th, right? Where does it cut off?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 3:08 pm

It depends on the tribe. I've known tribes that cut off the money flow at 1/8th, whereas some are so desperate for members they'll accept as far as 1/32nd. Todd definitely qualifies since according to the Interbutts his grandmother was born and raised Yup'ik.

I'm rather amazed Sarah didn't freak out the first time she saw his willy – from her past it sounds like exotic dick was something of a sticking point.

Jus_Wonderin March 9, 2012 at 1:03 pm

IOKIYRAP

UnholyMoses March 9, 2012 at 12:15 pm

So wanting to tax the top 1% of wage earners an extra 3% on their marginal rate, while also ensuring Americans don't go bankrupt just because they got sick, is the EXACT SAME THING as white folks owning/beating/lynching teh blahs?

Huh.

I, uh … yeah.

Huh.

RadioDead March 9, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Grovel before the Grover.

BarackMyWorld March 9, 2012 at 12:15 pm
C_R_Eature March 9, 2012 at 12:35 pm

That's as concise a description of Palin's whole Career of Exhibitionism as I've ever seen. I'm just glad there's no sound.

MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:36 pm

For some reason "cotton-eyed joe" plays as background music in my head whenever I see that GIF.

slowhansolo March 9, 2012 at 12:17 pm

But, strangely, nothing about GOP state lawmakers taking women back to the Reconstruction era.

elviouslyqueer March 9, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Cabbling bunt is cabbling.

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 2:37 pm

Her new name, "cabblingbunt."

SorosBot March 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Because acknowledging that racism or class differences exist in America, and trying to do something to fix it, is the real racism / is class warfare.

GeorgiaBurning March 9, 2012 at 1:23 pm

That's some catch, that Catch-22

MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:42 pm

But America is like Ronald Reagan on a unicorn, riding a rainbow toward a beautiful future while shooting at wolves below with an assault rifle. Why can't we all unite behind this vision / reality?

soeoho March 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm

Considering her vast knowledge of American history i.e. Paul Revere and his attempt to take away John Wilkes Booth's gun rights over British silly spelling habits I just don't see the issue with her…don't see the issue with her…don't see the issue with her…don't see the issue with her…

orygoon March 9, 2012 at 12:18 pm

This fucking woman.

johnnyzhivago March 9, 2012 at 12:19 pm

My cat has more lucid thoughts than Palin.

actor212 March 9, 2012 at 12:20 pm

A stone sitting in a stream under six inches of ice has more lucid thoughts than Sarah Palin

Geminisunmars March 9, 2012 at 12:56 pm

A basketball being dribbled down the court has more lucid thoughts than Palin.

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 1:43 pm

That furry stuff in the back of the refrigerator has more lucid thoughts than Palin, and reproduces at a more measured pace.

NewtsChicknNeck March 9, 2012 at 3:00 pm

tebow's left arm > palin's left brain

flamingpdog March 9, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Darwin help us if Palin has anywhere close to nine lives.

johnnyzhivago March 9, 2012 at 12:19 pm

Question to historians: why didn't the Civil War end Traffic Light Slavery too??

prommie March 9, 2012 at 12:20 pm

I can't wait till she shows up at the convention and they immediately nominate her by unanimous voice vote! Then when she gets elected, she can use the federal authorities to go after her sister-in-law's ex!

annettaj March 9, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Oh hell– are they still letting Sarah eat the uncooked meat?

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Letting her? They have to toss her chunks of it to keep her from really going on a rampage.

mavenmaven March 9, 2012 at 12:21 pm

It looks like the one "contribution" of Newt Gingrich's candidacy to Fox news discourse is the creation of "Alinsky" as a perjorative. I have no doubt that Palin has no idea who he was, or what he did, or that the GOP used his books as much as anyone else. It is a shame that a great man is being smeared just for Fox news talking points.

Geminisunmars March 9, 2012 at 12:54 pm

On the other hand, now we know who he was. Sort of.

finallyhappy March 9, 2012 at 2:29 pm

I know I've said it here before but 2 degrees of separation- I have a friend who knew Alinsky (but then I have friends who were involved in the Civil rights movement and still work for social justice here and around the world). That's right, we are socialist commie liberals.

Crank_Tango March 9, 2012 at 12:22 pm

This logic is flawless: healthcare=slavery. It always has been, and it always will be.

Not to be confused with the holocaust, which = taxes, of course.

NellCote71 March 9, 2012 at 2:28 pm

And Hitler, which = Obama, of course.

SayItWithWookies March 9, 2012 at 12:25 pm

It's ridiculous — we white people were dragged over here from Africa to work on the plantations and make the black man rich, and after fighting and winning our freedom, that awful Col. Obama wants to force us out into the fields again and under the lash of the overseer while he sips lemonade on the veranda. Never again!

MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Thank god the underground railroad led us to freedom in Alaska.

Lionel[redacted]Esq March 9, 2012 at 12:28 pm

Sarah Palin talking to Sean Hannity: Great Meeting of the Minds, or Greatest Meeting of the Minds Ever?

anniegetyerfun March 9, 2012 at 12:49 pm

The Bestest Greatest Meeting of the Smartest Brains, EVER Forever.

Throw in a little Herman Cain, and you'd have a veritable black hole (heh) of intelligence. Brilliance so dense that it pulls in everything around it.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 9, 2012 at 1:19 pm

No illumination would escape, you can be sure of that.

ttommyunger March 9, 2012 at 1:57 pm

Greatest egos, fer sure!

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:04 am

How 'bout Meeting of the Greatest Dumb Assholes EVAH. Will you settle for THAT?

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:29 pm

So noted Historian Sarah Palin has concluded that the Civil War actually was about slavery, and not state's rights?! Well she might as well stay home from the Convention, because she just kissed the Southern Asshat vote goodbye!!

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:45 pm

That's "War of Northern Aggression," I'll have you know.

(Seriously, I have actually heard people call it that down here. Someone rescue me, please).

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Aren't you moving to Michigan?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 12:53 pm

My new place won't be ready for 3 months – I could get mistaken for a varmint and get hunted down and field dressed in that amount of time.

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm

In that case, I'd watch out for the militias when you get to Michigan, also.

Chichikovovich March 9, 2012 at 1:34 pm

You're coming to Michigan? Welcome! It's actually a great place, so long as you never set foot west of Ann Arbor.*

[*Excepting whatever place the commenter-formerly-known-as-Negropolis lives. If you go there by helecopter and never stray from TCFKAN's protection.]

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 1:46 pm

You're coming to Michigan!? Where?

glamourdammerung March 9, 2012 at 3:46 pm

Yeah, I always thought the "War of Northern Aggression" which started when the Southerners fired on American troops was pretty goofy myself.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:08 am

Sweetie baby, if ONLY I COULD. You'd be everybody's favourite breakfast out here, fuck that cheesy grits shit.

Geminisunmars March 9, 2012 at 12:50 pm

I think you'd have a hard time proving that was what she was saying.

NewtsChicknNeck March 9, 2012 at 3:04 pm

you'd have a hard time proving anything she's ever said. she's the world's worst deposition transcript. you (I) can't train clients to be that stupid.

Oblios_Cap March 9, 2012 at 12:32 pm

So – $arah gleams information while us lesser mortals just glean it?

Generation[redacted] March 9, 2012 at 12:37 pm

you can't refudiate what she gleams!

Wonderthing March 9, 2012 at 12:33 pm

Hey come on. Even mean spirited, bigoted, privileged, anal retentive, fact ignoring, education hating, class unconscious, people have to have a voice. She am it for that.

Guppy March 9, 2012 at 12:33 pm

I thought Bristol brought the depth and Levi… well…

neiltheblaze March 9, 2012 at 12:44 pm

I'm sure it was the most wonderful three minutes of his life.

flamingpdog March 9, 2012 at 3:26 pm

What was he doing the other two and a half minutes?

Guppy March 9, 2012 at 3:30 pm

So you're buying Bristol's line of "only once, while drunk?"

neiltheblaze March 9, 2012 at 3:38 pm

Foreplay! That or fumbling with the rubber. Unsuccessfully.

barto March 9, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Here's the takeaway line from that whole exchange:

Hannity: Whu–

SoBeach March 9, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Obama is bringing back slavery? Crap. And we can't even fight back since we let him confiscate all our guns. Maybe the new Muslim god Obama is making us all pray to will help us.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:10 am

Isn't that teh Gawd Aquabuddha?

BTWBFDIMHO March 9, 2012 at 12:37 pm

Why is she trying to make Obama more attractive to Republicans? Mitt won't like that, bitch.

Biff March 9, 2012 at 12:37 pm

"those days when we were in different classes based on income, based on color of skin"
Uh, I'm old enough to remember when we were not only in different classes, but actually different schools entirely.

I know, that's not what she meant, blah blah blah, but really, what DID she mean?

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 1:49 pm

She meant SKREORTCH! Sometimes she goes on for a longer period of time (SKREEEEORTCH). And that is what she means each time. Skreortch. And if you can make sense out of that, you can make sense out of Palin, and if that happens, you should probably get help.

CountryClubJihadi March 9, 2012 at 12:38 pm

I believe John Brown would have referred to our Harriet Flubman as a "Brain Abolitionist".

Chet Kincaid March 9, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Allow me to clean this up a little, I have good reading comprehension of Moron, even though I am not a native speaker. Sarah heard someone much smarter than her critique liberals and their affirmative action by saying that programs and actions intended to redress historic inequities actually perpetuate those inequities. That's because they require us to still differentiate between people in order to "hand out the goodies", instead of pretending that racism and inequality never happened and then expecting everyone to succeed or fail by merit, starting right now.

Of course, if this was a meritocracy, Sarah would never be seen or heard as a public figure again, so thank God some people can still succeed in life by giving Idiot Conservative Men a boner!

imissopus March 9, 2012 at 1:19 pm

This is good news for male prostitutes and altar boys!

C_R_Eature March 9, 2012 at 12:40 pm

Alright. I tried to read that, but it hurt so much I had to stop. Then, I tried to watch the video but that horrible screeching voice saying those nonsense words made me stop the player in fear that she might actually be conjuring some horrible Demon that would eat everyone.
I just can't handle that woman. Not at all.

chascates March 9, 2012 at 12:47 pm

But you'd think Palin would love being the Antebellum Belle of the Planters! Planting the ideas of hate and the seeds of distortion, she'd sashay through the ballroom fluttering her eyes and drawl 'you betcha' to the delight of the entirely white crowd.
Her ideas of equal opportunity don't include people who share different ideas about the role of government, God, and gays in America that she does. She certainly has one thing in common with the post-Civil War era though. She is nothing but a carpetbagger!

flamingpdog March 9, 2012 at 3:45 pm

But watch out for the tea spilled on the carpet.

VinnyThePooh March 9, 2012 at 12:49 pm

In four years Sarah went from
Drill, Baby, Drill!
to
You have equal opportunity to work hard and to succeed and to embrace the opportunities, god-given opportunities to develop resources, to work extremely hard.
Equal opportunity to work hard. Extremely hard.

Also, I never knew Hebrew National was a bike gang.

Biff March 9, 2012 at 1:23 pm

Even "drill baby, drill" was plagiarized from Michael Steele. Beyond her intellect to come up with it on her own, I suspect.

An_Outhouse March 9, 2012 at 12:49 pm

"it has taken all these years for many Americans to understand that gravity" …

That gravity what? I think this is mostly a problem for home schoolers.

ph7 March 9, 2012 at 12:50 pm

That gravity is just a theory with many holes in it.

Guppy March 9, 2012 at 12:52 pm

Uncle Todd's Cabin

An_Outhouse March 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm

$arah is KNOT a CUNT!!

Guppy March 9, 2012 at 12:53 pm

No, knotting it off is Against God's Will.

chascates March 9, 2012 at 12:56 pm

And for more background: http://www.regnery.com/books/pigcivilwar.html

He [author] also explains why the Southern states had more in common with our Founding Fathers and the spirit of the Declaration of Independence than most history textbooks admit.
How, if there had been no Civil War, the South would have abolished slavery peaceably
Why leading Northern generals—like McClellan and Sherman—hated abolitionists
How the Confederate States of America might have helped the Allies win World War I sooner
How bombing people "back to the Stone Age" got its start with the Federal siege of Vicksburg
Why General James Longstreet fought the Battle of Sharpsburg in his carpet slippers
The Politically Incorrect GuideTM to the Civil War is a joyful, myth-busting, rebel yell that shatters today's Leftist and demeaning stereotypes about the South and the Civil War—showing why, in G. K. Chesterton's words, "America and the whole world is crying out for the spirit of the Old South." Civil War buffs, Southern partisans, and everyone who is tired of liberal self-hatred that vilifies America's greatest heroes—must have this book on their bookshelf.

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 1:52 pm

That just makes my hair stand on end. {shiver}

MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Liberal self-hatred? So we are all ashamed to be confederates?

Never use Palin's editor.

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Jesus fuck what a punchable bastard. I'm never in favor of burning books, but I would not mind leaving an entire stinking crate of that tripe to rot on a dirt road. In Syria.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:24 am

Terlet paper is expensive in them parts. Don't let it rot. Distribute it.

40 or 50 % McShineys March 9, 2012 at 12:58 pm

You know, if she said she exclusively read "e e cummings," instead of answering "All Of Them, Katie" she could have opened up a serious new performance art grift front for herself.

Allmighty_Manos March 9, 2012 at 1:01 pm

God it must suck working for Media Matters. I'd imagine its media center resembles the ludovico treatment scene in Clockwork Orange.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 9, 2012 at 1:17 pm

I think this is what the Mayans were trying to warn us about.

archikvetch March 9, 2012 at 1:26 pm

CLOVEN hoof in mouth, right?

Troglodeity March 9, 2012 at 1:42 pm

With spokespeople like Palin, I just don't understand why the GOP isn't rocking the African-American vote.

NellCote71 March 9, 2012 at 3:18 pm

Or the wimmenz vote too, while they still have it.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:25 am

Wimmenz are allowed to VOTE? Oh, shit, nobody TOLD them!

HelmutNewton March 9, 2012 at 1:55 pm

With her constant barrage of verbal diarrhea, Palin must have to stick close to a bathroom.

ttommyunger March 9, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Does she not know that this shit is being recorded? How can she not know she sounds like the airhead kunt she is? And Insanity? Don't get me started about that big dumb kunt. He is actually a bigger kunt than Palin and she is Horse-Collar Variety kunt. Why is my spell-check going nutz?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 3:11 pm

I really think Sarah was that bitchy hot chick in high school that could say whatever dumb thing she wanted and boys would still laugh and buy her presents. She hasn't yet figured out that the real world is not the same as junior prom queen elections.

ttommyunger March 9, 2012 at 7:37 pm

Sadly, her (mostly) male supporters are stuck well within that adolescent mind-set and mentality.

reasonbran March 9, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Wait, wait, I think I get it! Obama acknowledges the reality of class and financial inequality. Sarah is aware that before the Civil War, there was class inequality. There was a special word for it. It'll come to me in a moment. Yeah, that's it, slavery! It was mentioned in a book she read in school once. This establishes an incontrovertible parallelism, well a sort of converging parallelism really, between Obama's awareness of class issues and pre-Civil War slavery and such. Since A now equals B and Obama wants A, well then he must want B too. Which makes him like, uh, into slavery.

Ow. Brain hurts. Must drink tequila.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:27 am

Oh, so you're struggling with the delusion that Parasailin' actually understands concepts like "parallelism"? Here, have a cool glass of water and a crate of Advils. They'll help with that blistering headache.

reasonbran March 10, 2012 at 6:03 am

Naw, she doesn't need to. We're talking serpentine, subterranean pseudo-logic here. Imagine a snake-path in the grass. That's Sarah Palin's brain. Pre-logical and possibly pre-stupid.

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Palin. Sarah. Yes, you, twatwaffle. You are getting angrier and angrier and looking more and more haggard and bitter with every passing day.

You must accept it. I know it is eating away at you like the monster drool in Alien, but seriously, President Obama is not ever going to think of you for even a nanosecond.

You are not ever going to wink and shimmy your way into his manly arms. You are never, ever, ever, going to be able to elbow Michelle aside as you gloat that Bamz is yours.

You see, our excellent, brilliant, and yes, studly, President has the lovely, brilliant, kind, loving, gorgeous Michelle to fall into bed with night after night after glorious night.

An embittered, vicious, rapidly aging, breathtakingly stupid hag whose raging narcissism is stunningly out of touch with reality, simply isn't of any interest to the President.

And Sarah, I think you know it. The barely contained simmering rage thinly layered over your unrequited lust* is becoming just too, too tackily obvious, dear. Really. Take a break. Ratchet down the rage, honey. At some point even Hannity may notice that you are becoming more than a little unhinged.

*By lust, I mean the lady grasshopper biting the head off her hapless mate at the crucial moment.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:32 am

Also, too, the fact that Toad has been banging that Shailey female (who, frankly, looks like a rather unsexay lump of dough, and I mean that in the BEST fucking way) forEVAH while she wuz tootling on to the whole planet about what a studly lump of man-meat he was has GOTTA be fuckin' killing her, and I mean that in a totally loving, caring, nonviolent sort of way. Her husband doesn't want her, her kids don't listen to her, her husband's business partner (whom she was banging, until he came to his senses and returned to his screech-deficient wife) doesn't want her, and she's reduced to giving freebie speeches to empty halls in Bumwad, FL and Arsewipe, CO. This is her last desperate grab at relevance. The only way out for her from here on is straight down the fucking tubes to oblivion. It hurts, and it shows. Good.

SheriffRoscoe March 9, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Gravity is a mistake? Did I at least read that one correctly?

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Gravity was a mistake that happened before the Civil War. And then the Civil War had to really start changing America so now we don't have that gravity mistake any more? But Obama wants to take us back to the days when we had the gravity mistake?

Roast in hell, John McCain (after a long and happy life filled with joy, blah, blah, blah, of course).

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:35 am

As an atheist, I regret that I cannot consign that malignant miserable motherfucker to a so-richly deserved eternal torment. Therefore I console myself with the knowledge that he is bitter, unloved, and irrelevant, and that must be eating at him in a way that is a thousand times worse than his cancer ever was. He will not be mourned by anyone except his children (and he deserves their love and solicitude, despite his faults). Certainly not by the wife he has treated so badly. Nor by the nation he has done so much to destroy.

MadBrahms March 9, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Gravity: how did it get there?

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 3:31 pm

Dragged in on the tide?

jolpaj March 9, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Mitt Romney has never hugged a critical race theorist! He may or may not have hugged anybody, but if he has, that person has never published an article arguing that the uplifting rhetoric of equality and integration should not be allowed to distract us from persistent material inequality.

.

stncmchnc March 9, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Ewwww! What's that? Oh its the Honey Grifter. The Honey Grifter don't care, the Honey Grifter don't give a xhit. My sincere apologies to Randall.

GOPCrusher March 9, 2012 at 2:27 pm

There was a sign at a Tea Bagger rally in 2009 that expressly said the Obama's Plan was White Slavery.
But there was nothing racist about it.

James Michael Curley March 9, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Watching that clip last night I had the image that one day she is on the TV and all that plastic surgery goes crashing down like a hundred year old Brooklyn townhouse facade only it takes out several blocks while doing so.

FlipOffResearch March 9, 2012 at 2:33 pm

"Hannity: Bleebloopityblahblah?"

That is the most accurate transcription of a Hannitty thought I have ever seen.

NewtsChicknNeck March 9, 2012 at 2:44 pm

Ms. Palin will be the first to tell you not all men are created equal. See, e.g. Rice, Glen.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:36 am

Woof, woof.

AlaskaGrrl March 9, 2012 at 3:00 pm

Sarah can see the English Language from her house.

ChessieNefercat March 9, 2012 at 5:22 pm

Sarah can see the English Language in her crosshairs from her house.

AlaskaGrrl March 9, 2012 at 3:01 pm

Syntax? Nope, our Sarah is anti tax of any kind!

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:37 am

And *certainly* on SYN, of any kind, given how much she has indulged in.

freddymcmurray March 9, 2012 at 3:19 pm

created equal, not created equally, dipshit

WiscDad March 9, 2012 at 3:23 pm

What the fuck ever….when will this bitch just go away?

DahBoner March 9, 2012 at 4:38 pm

It's sad, really that all Obama wants to do now is sit around and play banjo music all day…

Veritas78 March 9, 2012 at 7:15 pm

She certainly is a "rutted dancer." If you know what I mean, winkwink.

horsedreamer_1 March 9, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Let me suggest Sarah is one those who vows never to be a wage-slave.

rocktonsam March 9, 2012 at 9:19 pm

maybe if Todd rode $arah more often than his snow machine, oh forget it.

W88 March 10, 2012 at 2:21 pm

Poor Sarah.
She has not been right in the head ever since Glen Rice put his black love stick deep into her and gave her brain damage.

wolvenwood13 March 10, 2012 at 4:48 pm

Good Lord, this woman makes me sorry we women ever got the vote.

Come here a minute March 12, 2012 at 9:05 pm

In Sarah's world, "develop resources" means oil drilling, so clearly, when she sees a black man all she can think of is "Drill Babby Drill".

Sharkey March 9, 2012 at 1:11 pm

Is that what the kids are calling it?

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 3:15 pm

Ann Arbor — details on neighborhood still forthcoming. Originally I was trucking up to Ferndale, but Ann Arbor sounds more like the city feel I love.

Fare la Volpe March 9, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Ha, I had a friend who offered me a place in Detroit and I politely declined — gun shot wounds clash with my hair color. Fortunately a few months later he packed up and moved to Ferndale and then Ann Arbor and offered me a place in his new house now that his roomie is moving out. Now we just have to wait three months until his co-tenant skedaddles so I can swoop in and claim it.

Chichikovovich March 9, 2012 at 3:37 pm

What will you be doing here?—

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:09 am

Tsk! Being the sexayest hot young thing in town, of course!

Honestly, Chich.

FROTHY March 10, 2012 at 4:23 am

"Viagra" is a little difficult for their tender little palates.

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