CONSPIRACIES  6:54 pm March 1, 2012

Wingnuts May Not Believe in Climate Change, But Insurance Companies Sure Do

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

Ugh, unwashed godless free market-hating ecoterrorist hippie cabal “the insurance industry” is whining about global warming, according to this press release just in from Bernie Sanders’ office. Oh just go make out with a bunch of dolphins, brainwashed hippies:

Property and casualty insurers in the United States experienced an extraordinary estimated $44 billion in losses last year when hurricanes, droughts, tornadoes and other natural disasters were more severe, longer, more frequent and less predictable than in the past. “From our industry’s perspective, the footprints of climate change are around us and the trend of increasing damage to property and threat to lives is clear,” said Franklin Nutter, president of the Reinsurance Association of America.

According to Swiss Reinsurance Company Ltd., the average weather-related insurance industry loss in the U.S. was about $3 billion a year in the 1980s compared to approximately $20 billion annually by the end of the past decade. “A warming climate will only add to this trend of increasing losses, which is why action is needed now,” said Mark Way, head of Swiss Re’s sustainability and climate change activities in the Americas.

[Senator Bernie Sanders]


Hola wonkerados.

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SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 6:58 pm

So a certain industry has decided it's no longer interested in Koch sucking.

hagajim March 2, 2012 at 11:47 am

Oh no – they'll still be sucking Koch….they just plan to raise rates to cover their increasing losses. Thus the Head of Sustainability position, which really means sustainability of their business model.

Dashboard Buddha March 1, 2012 at 6:59 pm

I mentioned this to a customer once and all he can say is, "damn insurance companies are just using that excuse to jack up your rates".

In a more open and honest dimension I would have told him, "dude yes, they're fucking with you, but not in the way you think". He still wouldn't have understood, but I'd be able to be more open and honest.

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 7:06 pm

“From our industry’s perspective, the footprints of climate change are around us and the trend of increasing damage to property and threat to lives is clear,” said Franklin Nutter, president of the Reinsurance Association of America.

Hmm, this Nutter doesn't sound like much of a nutter at all.

James Michael Curley March 1, 2012 at 7:10 pm

"And when you saw only one set of foot prints,
That is when Climate Change was carrying you."

Designer_Rants March 2, 2012 at 11:06 am


flamingpdog March 1, 2012 at 8:50 pm

Sounds more like a Franklin to me.

Loaded_Pants March 1, 2012 at 10:47 pm

Poor Ben would be vilified today because he was all about that science & other elitist fancy thinkin'.

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 7:06 pm

They sure give a shit about science the minute it threatens their precious whore diamonds.

Crank_Tango March 1, 2012 at 10:24 pm

or kills browns.

Callyson March 1, 2012 at 7:07 pm

Franklin Nutter, president of the Reinsurance Association of America
I don't suppose this guy is related to Philadelphia Mayor Michael "don't be idiots and assholes" Nutter? Because it sure would be nice if he would share the Nutter message with the wingnuts…

James Michael Curley March 1, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Nutters cross all races.

OzoneTom March 1, 2012 at 7:54 pm

Nuttering nabobs of negativism.

poncho_pilot March 2, 2012 at 12:02 am

all of them descendants of Agnes Nutter.

Advn2rgirl March 3, 2012 at 9:52 am

She was so precise and exact.

James Michael Curley March 1, 2012 at 7:08 pm

Swiss RE the bailout that slipped under the radar during the GHWBush administration. Not to worry it was only a couple billion higher than the Savings and Loan bailout.

DaRooster March 1, 2012 at 7:12 pm

What a bunch of crap… there ain't no warmin'… it has been only 65 fucking degrees on the Northern Nor-Cal Coast all through February.


littlebigdaddy March 2, 2012 at 12:52 am

ANd it's snowing in Colorado!!!!!!11111

Steverino247 March 1, 2012 at 7:17 pm

The Good News: climate change is caused by human activity. Why is this good news? Because if we caused it, we can do something about it, like we did with the Ozone Layer by eliminating CFC's in aerosol products.

The Bad News: climate change is caused by factors beyond our control. Why is this bad news? Because we can't do a damned thing about it and can't evolve fast enough to survive what's coming next.

There is no doubt that the climate is changing. I'm old enough to notice the changes and I'm not in that field of study. Imagine the view that specialists have. Scary.

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 7:20 pm

Can't we just pray the climate away, like we do the gay?

Steverino247 March 1, 2012 at 7:31 pm

When the levee breaks, I'll have no place to pray.

(Not that I would ever waste time like that.)

Loaded_Pants March 1, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Prophetess Memphis Minnie sang:
Oh cryin' won't help you prayin' won't do no good
Oh cryin' won't help you prayin' won't do no good
Whenever the levee breaks momma you got to lose

Wonder why no one paid attention?
Maybe because of two very distinct reasons.

Bonzos_Bed_Time March 1, 2012 at 8:45 pm

Paging Dr. Marcus, paging Dr. Marcus…

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 9:17 pm

Considering that some of the fundamentalists think we don't have to stop climate change because the magic man in the sky won't let things get that bad for us, I wouldn't be surprised to hear that proposed seriously.

montreal_bruin March 1, 2012 at 9:57 pm

Rick Perry is a true pioneer !!

James Michael Curley March 2, 2012 at 8:21 am

Didn't they read Nightfall?

DaRooster March 1, 2012 at 9:15 pm

It probably is beyond our control (there are those here that could give us facts)… however do not let that get you down.
I revert to high school…(my senior year book quote)-

"Live every day as if it were your last and one day you shall be right."
DaRooster, Class of 83

FlownOver March 1, 2012 at 7:20 pm

"…action is needed now."

Well, sure, because you can't raise rates over something that isn't going to happen.

sent from Brownbackistan, where it's 70˚ on March 1. Sam must have prayed winter away.

edgydrifter March 1, 2012 at 7:21 pm

I will pay handsomely to watch an Insurance vs. Petrochemical lucha libre cage-match SMAKKAGEDDON!!!

Actually, I'm guessing we will all pay handsomely for this in the end.

ifthethunderdontgetya March 1, 2012 at 7:21 pm

If only we could get the insurance industry and the oil industry to fight each other, instead of fighting over what little the rest of us have left.

GOPCrusher March 2, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Sadly, taking what little we have left is how they measure victory.

noodlesalad March 1, 2012 at 7:28 pm

Every serious business is now working climate change into the books, even the oil companies. Actually, the oil companies are accounting for it twice – one time for service disruptions (climate events that affect operations) and another time to pay the guys who pretend it isn't happening. Who says Exxon doesn't care about the environment?

GregComlish March 1, 2012 at 7:51 pm

Three times actually: they're already planning on drilling in the artic when the ice retreats

Lascauxcaveman March 1, 2012 at 8:10 pm

LOL, the hotel I run is at 12 feet above sea level. The unfinished basement of the building still has shells and flotsam from where the high tides used to wash up before 1914 when the downtown area was raised up 12 feet with sluiced-in fill dirt.

I think our global warming action plan for the whole downtown area is probably to become "The Venice of the Pacific Northwest." Once those polar icecaps have a chance to sweat a little more, I'll be finishing my commute by kayak.

Bonzos_Bed_Time March 1, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Buddy and I were on the Balboa Penninsula in Newport Beach, just figuring out what would be underwater in the not-so-near future. Billions of $$$ in real estate there. Basically a total loss of some of the most expensive real estate in USAmerica.

Suck on that, bitches.

nounverb911 March 1, 2012 at 7:36 pm

The really good news is: rising ocean levels will wash away all the 1%ers living in Greenwich and Palm Beach.

memzilla March 1, 2012 at 7:44 pm

“'A warming climate will only add to this trend of increasing losses, which is why action is needed now,' said [a Swiss Re spokesman]."

Action = steep premium increase, and denying that your claim was caused by climate change.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 3:08 am

Better yet, a climate change exclusion. "Sorry, but the tornado/hurricane/wildfire/flash flood that leveled your house was due to climate change, and your policy doesn't cover climate change."
That, and a steep hike in rates.

OzoneTom March 1, 2012 at 7:52 pm

Nutter still doesn't make it clear whether the industry considers climate change to be an "Act of God" or man-made.

Biff March 1, 2012 at 9:26 pm

Whichever of the two that makes it an uninsured loss, obviously.

GOPCrusher March 2, 2012 at 5:12 pm

Depends. If you are a corporation, it's an "Act Of God".
If you're Joe Schmoe from Pocatello, Idaho, it's "Man-Made" and you're fucked.

arihaya March 1, 2012 at 8:09 pm

OT: Petroleum companies do believe in Climate Change, also

It just that they don't want ordinary people and elected officials to believe in Climate Change, so the companies can keep drilling and drilling..

these companies is acting like some thieves who looted Warsaw when Nazi are approaching

user-of-owls March 1, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Oh yeah? Well if climate change is so 'real' then why was it exactly 78 degrees in my house all winter long?! Riddle me that, you lice-ridden surety whore Trotskyites!

ShaveTheWhales March 1, 2012 at 10:03 pm

Really good insulation?

Spurning Beer March 1, 2012 at 10:13 pm

Actuarial bolshies.

user-of-owls March 1, 2012 at 10:18 pm

Atheist abacists.

not that Dewey March 1, 2012 at 10:42 pm

Adiabatic anarchists.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 3:11 am

Because you live in Miami?

pinkocommi March 1, 2012 at 8:13 pm

When Romney said "Corporations are people too, my friends," I am sure he didn't mean insurance companies.

Texan_Bulldog March 1, 2012 at 8:13 pm

But what does the Geico gecko think about this?

KeepFnThatChicken March 1, 2012 at 8:57 pm

Cold-blooded. More warmth is good.

pinkocommi March 1, 2012 at 8:16 pm

Overwhelming scientific evidence of man-made global warming -> I don't believe it!
1000s of pages of crap in the Bible written by ignorant nomads -> It must be true!

Bonzos_Bed_Time March 1, 2012 at 8:48 pm

Jeebus told the nomads what to write. Prove he didn't!

Chichikovovich March 1, 2012 at 8:58 pm

Look, even most if not all of the first all star team of global warming deniers will acknowledge that climate is changing significantly and distressingly fast. That's one reason why a few years ago the word "man-made" crept into the deniers stock phrase: "No man-made climate change blah blah." They have to: it's all around you. Where I grew up in Northern Ontario has millions of tiny streams in which speckled trout spawn and can be caught. My father noticed that many of his old trout-bearing streams weren't yielding fish anymore. Spoke to a Ministry of Natural Resources biologist who said, yes, try maybe 20 miles north and you'll find speckles. They had been moving slowly north, with a regularity that the biologists had been able to predict with astonishing accuracy, year in and year out.

Ask any Michigan cherry orchard manager about the now-regular early starts to the growing season (potentially catastrophic for them because you don't want the blossoms to start growing when frost could still knock them out). Ask Carribean divers about changes in reef flora and fauna. … Ask anybody whose livelihood can be affected by this and they will tell you the same thing. It's happening. You can fake one graph or one study, maybe even dishonestly stack a journal or two. But not even George Soros, font of all that is evil in the world, could arrange this.

So the "serious" global warming deniers have retreated to their fortified fallback: sure, it's happening, but it isn't manmade! Prove it! (Next fallback: OK, it's manmade in part but we can't do anything about it." Next fallback: "OK, there's warming and it's manmade and we can do something about it but it wouldn't be worth the costs which will be so huge we had to invent entirely new numbers to describe them." …

One reason it's clear that most of the people denying manmade global warming are morons (above and beyond their patent moronicity) is that their “arguments" would be arguments against warming full stop, which even their serious paid “scientist"/hacks don't deny.

One reason it's clear that the paid hacks are hacks is that they actually try to encourage the confusion of all these different positions rather than strive to straighten them out. If some denier with a PhD appears on Hannity and Hannity makes the usual "Man, it was freezing last July 7! Take that Al Gore." argument, the hack won't correct him and strive for clarity. He'll just go with the confused flow. Glad to see it.

johnnyzhivago March 1, 2012 at 9:02 pm

If God intended man to change his climate, do you think he would have started the Weather Channel or created Al Roker???

JustPixelz March 1, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Dick Cheney said any serious threat to the nation with a 1% chance of occurring should be treated as a certainty. Like if al Queda could get a submarine or something.

But with climate change — which has at least a 100% chance of occurring (is occurring, as you point out) — is treated by the Republicans as a hoax or a liberal conspiracy or "just a theory" or something the elites dreamed up. Facts, as Ronald Reagan said, are stubborn things. Insurance companies seem to know this.

BarackMyWorld March 1, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Most of the deniers I hear about are still denying it absolutely. The few "man-made" deniers are getting drowned out by the extremists, at this point I'm afraid.

Redhead March 2, 2012 at 8:00 am

I think there's a little crossover between the groups – the common refrain I hear is that things are cyclical, and we're just in a warm spell. But that's natural, and eventually we'll be in a cool spell again – Denying that it's man-made and deciding that it's temporary.

KeepFnThatChicken March 1, 2012 at 8:58 pm

They're lying. The actuarial tables are just a Ouija board.

johnnyzhivago March 1, 2012 at 9:00 pm

Damned Insurance Companies just want to get their names in Scientific American or something, thats all.

BaldarTFlagass March 2, 2012 at 9:02 am

That's a bad hat, Harry.

Guppy March 1, 2012 at 9:06 pm

It's OK: most weather disasters happen in red states anyway. I'm sure the state governments will let the free market decide insurance rates and not try to over-regulate insurance prices or establish state-run insurance alternatives.

poncho_pilot March 2, 2012 at 12:16 am

and since those states are all about smaller government they should be happy to not take any disaster relief from the federal government. you know, so they can maintain their principled consistency (ha!).

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 3:16 am

Notice that you don't see the insurance companies sponsoring big pray-it-away Jeebusfests, in an attempt to save themselves billions of dollars.

donner_froh March 1, 2012 at 9:23 pm

One of the most obvious indications that everyone other than idiots think that global warming is not only happening but doing so at an accelerating rate is the way countries that border on the Arctic are claiming sovereignty over various parts of it. Russia, Norway, Canada, the United States of Amerikkka and even Denmark (through Greenland) are making plans for a year-round ice free Arctic Ocean.

starfanglednut March 2, 2012 at 9:49 am

Yup, started when the Northwest passage opened.

BaldarTFlagass March 2, 2012 at 9:54 am

Martin Frobisher should have just waited 450 years.

ttommyunger March 1, 2012 at 10:33 pm

I guess we're not much smarter than frogs. Just heat the water slowly enough and we'll quietly boil. Glad I'll be dead before then, but I feel for my grandkids.

MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:14 pm

Grandkids should be okay. Probably 500 years to go. At that point SARS, AIDS, nuclear weapons, tsunamis, lack of food, and global warming should create a whole new generation of fossil fuels.

ttommyunger March 11, 2012 at 8:24 pm

Not a good time to be young, sadly.

ManchuCandidate March 1, 2012 at 9:59 pm

Wow. It's like wingnuts are just stupid ignorant ill informed dipshitty gomers who'll believe whatever some asshole from an oil company sez.

ShaveTheWhales March 1, 2012 at 10:08 pm

Good thing that's just an illusion, huh?

LetUsBray March 1, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Oh yeah? Well, Al Gore flies in planes and is fat. Check MATE!!1!!!!11!

ElPinche March 1, 2012 at 11:05 pm

What does Andrew Breitbart think about this?
Oh wait, he's still dead.

DahBoner March 2, 2012 at 10:34 am


HistoriCat March 2, 2012 at 1:07 pm


James Michael Curley March 1, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Winter in NJ on the coast in 2011 had three snow storms (Nor'easters) which dumped a total of 64 inches of snow in three weeks. This winter we have not had an inch of snow yet. Yesterday a Nor'easter came through that if it was snow would have dumped a foot to a foot and a half.

My neighbor said last year it was proof Climate Change warming did not exist. This winter an average 45 degree temperature is 'cause by the Gulf Stream moving inland.but Obama won't let the weather service report it.'

The fact we have had Nor'easters before April 1st about four years in a row is, by far, the issue of greatest concern.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 3:19 am

Yeah, well, everybody knows those Northeasters are librul types.

James Michael Curley March 2, 2012 at 8:01 am

Now you see that’s another myth. Nor’easters are down home southern boys that travel up to New England and get corrupted. Just a big old bunch of hot air from Georgia looking for a little acceptance in the big city. Just like Newt.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 8:42 am

Send 'em to Harvard and MIT, and next thing you know they believe in things like science. What snobs!

James Michael Curley March 2, 2012 at 10:58 am

Nobody ever showed me a sciency molecule or atom or germ.I seen earth, wind, fire and rain.I seen sunny days that I thought would never end,But I always ..What? OK, I’ll turn it down.

BaldarTFlagass March 2, 2012 at 9:05 am

Is that the same Gulf Stream that originates in the Gulf of America?

Monsieur_Grumpe March 2, 2012 at 1:39 am

Stupid facts are getting the way of important stuff like what women are doing with their uterus’s and blowing up brown people.

MiniMencken March 2, 2012 at 4:51 am

When a wingnut tells me that climate change is a scam by scientists angling for grant money, I wonder why they never consider academics and scientists in other disciplines doing the same. And, I wonder if they realize the global warming data is coming from a variety of disciplines, making the grant-writing conspiracy remarkably complex and yet very tightly focused at the same time.

Preacher_Griz March 2, 2012 at 6:26 am

All scientists are in on the same living-on-the-govt-teet scam as are the climate scientists. Especially the darwinists.

BaldarTFlagass March 2, 2012 at 9:06 am

As a scientist who works for the federal government, all I can say is: WINNING!

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 8:41 am

The "round earth" conspiracy is the worst …. they're ALL in on that one. For the grant money.

cheaphits March 2, 2012 at 6:22 am

Does anybody else think it's gettin' warm in here?

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 8:39 am

Atlantic waters are hotter than ever … let's see how many monster hurricanes it takes to beat some sense into these fuckers.

DahBoner March 2, 2012 at 10:34 am

Is it hot in here or is it just me???

Preacher_Griz March 2, 2012 at 6:24 am

Climate change is caused by sunspot activity and is therefore an ACT OF GOD!!! These ripoff insurance companies are like the scientists and are trying to profiteer by DENYING GOD's EXISTENCE!!!

C_R_Eature March 2, 2012 at 8:53 am

Hey, Kids, James Inhofe is on The Washington Journal right now, reassuring us that Anthropogenic Climate Change is "The Greatest Hoax" and we should really be very afraid of the U.N. taking over everything, a few people becoming Billionaires off Green Propaganda (Algore!1!!) , Government Forcing Regulation Down Our Throats and Taxes!!

I'm on hold. Dammit!!! Anyone else out there able to call in? Just wanted to talk Science -y stuff with a self-taught oil company whore Expert.

C_R_Eature March 2, 2012 at 8:01 am

Now, some wackjob caller is wasting time asking about the secret US Gov't program of Geoengineering with Chemtrails. CHEMTRAILS! and I'm Still on Hold DAMMIT!!! ARRRRRRHGGHG!

C_R_Eature March 2, 2012 at 8:17 am

Inhofe: Global warming is caused by sunspots because some crank Israeli Scientist (was paid off to say) told me so.

Fucking Inhofe.

Biel_ze_Bubba March 2, 2012 at 8:38 am

Can anybody explain how a fucking moron like Inhofe could possibly rise to a position of power? There's sometihng seriously wrong with the electoral system here, and we need some sort of "Every Moron Left Behind Act" to fix it.

C_R_Eature March 2, 2012 at 8:52 am

Hey, Soon as you find out, please let me know!

I've seen a lot of Public "Deniers" of various inconvenient truths and it's obvious which ones are too smart to believe what they're paid to say. Inhofe's truly Blithering and he's bought into it completely.

BaldarTFlagass March 2, 2012 at 9:08 am

"Can anybody explain how a fucking moron like Inhofe could possibly rise to a position of power?"


MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:18 pm

What's the Washington Journal exactly?

C_R_Eature March 11, 2012 at 8:24 pm

It's a live daily discussion program on CSPAN, run in the mornings. Starts with a call in section, then interviews, with phone calls. You can watch streaming live or back catalog video at their website Here.

James Michael Curley March 2, 2012 at 10:35 am

Oklahoma House

DistrictNamePartyRoomPhoneCommittee Assignment
1 Sullivan, JohnR434 CHOB202-225-2211Energy and Commerce
2 Boren, DanD2447 RHOB202-225-2701Natural Resources
Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence
3 Lucas, FrankR2311 RHOB202-225-5565Agriculture, Chairman
Financial Services
Science, Space, and Technology
4 Cole, TomR2458 RHOB202-225-6165Appropriations
5 Lankford, JamesR509 CHOB202-225-2132Budget
Oversight and Government Reform
Transportation and Infrastructure

Oklahoma Senate

Coburn, Tom – (R – OK)Class III
(202) 224-5754
Web Form:

Inhofe, James M. – (R – OK)Class II
(202) 224-4721
Web Form:

MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:16 pm

Somehow I wonder if Howdy and Doody will pay much attention to missives from people with "facts".

Lucidamente1 March 2, 2012 at 9:47 am

And thus insurance companies join the ranks of those other extreme leftists who believe in climate change:

Chichikovovich March 2, 2012 at 10:06 am

Or possibly: It's warming, and it's manmade, and we can do something about it, and not doing so would be catastrophic, and the cost of doing something would not be prohibitive. BUT much of the money would go to an organization affiliated with another organization that spends 0.001% of its annual budget on abortion services.

DahBoner March 2, 2012 at 10:32 am

Where I'm at, we are supposed get 6 to 10 inches of snow tonight!


That proves Al Gore made up those insurance claims…

Blueb4sunrise March 2, 2012 at 10:37 am

sez something clever with topical newslink, and youtube video so that headliners will be inspired to post a new thread.


slowhansolo March 2, 2012 at 3:26 pm

I drove to work with the sun roof open every day this week. What were we talking about again?

Data Exactly March 2, 2012 at 3:53 pm

Maybe the Wingnuts will believe in Climate Change when they think it's a gigantic sentient being that can mind read?

DerrickWildcat March 2, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Ask any bird nerd and they'll tell you it's for realz. Birds are showing up early. Birds are showing up in areas where they're not supposed to be showing up. Birds are breeding in areas that they're not supposed to be breeding in. Current species Range distribution maps are being turned inside-out. Believe me, not all bird nerds are tree hugging hippie liberals. Some of the most accurate home school records come from retired farmer folks that live out on acreages in the country. Some of these folks have impressive journals that go back many many years of which day they show up and leave, which type and for how long birds appear in their yards.

MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:17 pm

Too bad the birds are fucked just like everything else on the planet. Give them some single-malt and an Escalade. That should keep them happy for a while.

MinAgain March 3, 2012 at 4:37 pm

My office was closed, and I was sent home early yesterday because of the weather. And that wasn't even the first tornado warning this year in Middle Tennessee. When tornados start coming before Valentine's Day, something is clearly wrong.

MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:18 pm

It's GOD!! nothing to do with fossil fuels. Jeez.

James Michael Curley March 2, 2012 at 9:37 am

Between Inhofe and Coburn using a complex logarithmic formula their combined IQ reaches positive intergers.

MrFizzy March 11, 2012 at 8:19 pm

His IQ is the sum of everyone else in the state combined. 90

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