SURE WHY NOT  3:00 pm March 1, 2012

Herman Cain Watches Girl Torture Goldfish From Mountaintop

by Jim Newell

Here is a little girl throwing water and mud on top of a goldfish she dumped on the ground. Did you know that it’s also a political ad from Herman Cain, decrying the Stimulus? Of course you did, what else would it be.

The ad doesn’t really explain what’s going on in the ad. There is a girl and she is just stone cold killin’ her fish, and then there is ol’ Herman “Herb” Cain watching it all from atop a mountain in Mordor. But oh, what is this — a description from the YouTube page!

The goldfish is fine, but our economy isn’t. Are you Sick yet? In essence, stimulus has been just like throwing a bucket of water on a fish and expecting him to swim on land. [...]

We want Solutions, not more Stimulus coming from Washington D.C.
We the people are Sick of Stimulus!

Ah, got it. Shut up.

[YouTube via The Atlantic]

 
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{ 177 comments }

Barb March 1, 2012 at 3:03 pm

That's just fucked up. Santa knows where this little brat lives. And hopefully, Pedobear.

CountryClubJihadi March 1, 2012 at 4:10 pm

I'd like to kick her little ass. Evil.

Extemporanus March 1, 2012 at 4:25 pm

Too bad Child Protective Services apparently doesn't.

redarmyzombie March 1, 2012 at 4:26 pm

As does Krampus.

Fox n Fiends March 1, 2012 at 3:04 pm

The hills have eyes.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:12 pm

Everytime I see that title, I want Julie Andrews to start singing…"The hills they have eyes…."

MOG2410 March 1, 2012 at 4:07 pm

So that's what they were putting on Godfather's pizza?

Trannysurprise March 1, 2012 at 3:05 pm

OT ALERT

Sheriff Joe 'Orly' Arpaio-Taitz to announce results of Obama birth certificate 'investigation' at 3PM.

WHERE IS MY LIVE BLOG WONKETTE????WHERE???

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:13 pm

WHAR BIRF CERFICICACK, JOE????

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

I'm sure it will go something like this:

"Er, black Kenyan man"
"No birfy certigicate"
"Kenyen Aphrica"
"Dur"

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm
BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Oh for fuck's sake. Really?

redarmyzombie March 1, 2012 at 4:28 pm

To be honest, can we really be surprised at this point?

fuflans March 1, 2012 at 3:47 pm

The White House did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

takes a while to stop laughing.

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 4:04 pm

Why the fuck would they respond to this bullshit rehash of the same long discredited idiotic and racist conspiracy theory that's been run into the ground?

Barrelhse March 1, 2012 at 3:51 pm

With the expected intelligent comments from the Washington Times 'readers.'

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:55 pm

I can almost see a scene where Obama steps to a mic and says "Y'know, I've been investigated for four years on these charges, had dozens of experts on both sides validate my birth certificate, but dayum! A small town Arizona sheriff and his half-inbred cousin with bad eyesight sussed me out. I'm resigning! Good luck getting this country back on its feet without me. If you need me, I'll be chairing Al Qaeda meetings"

MOG2410 March 1, 2012 at 4:08 pm

All six of them.

Trannysurprise March 1, 2012 at 3:31 pm

So far it has gone like this:

Obama is a black Kenyan, so therefore his birth certificate is fake. THAT IS SOME NO BULLSHIT PROOF RIGHT THERE FOLKS!!!!1!!

Just throw his black ass out of Air Force One as it passes over Gitmo.

CASE CLOSED.

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Or if you live up in Alaska, he's not President because he's mulatto, which is a word people still use, in English apparently.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:50 pm

In this day and age, I'm surprised they don't think it's something you order at Starbucks.

Neoyorquino March 1, 2012 at 4:15 pm

"Well, what's the word for it, Lana? You freaked out when I said 'quadroon.' " (Sorry — always enjoy an "Archer" reference whenever I can).

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Landshark.

Bently Thurgrew, III March 1, 2012 at 3:19 pm

Candygram.

Crank_Tango March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Candygram, also.

UnholyMoses March 1, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Just a dolphin, ma'am …

Clancy_Pants March 1, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Damn! What did that goldfish do to Dakota Fanning?

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:16 pm

You got it backwards: the fish committed suicide

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 3:33 pm

Death by Cindy is the new death by cop.

bumfug March 1, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Herman Cain ads are like throwing a bucket of shit at the camera and expecting anybody to care.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:16 pm

SANTORUM LIBEL!

LesBontemps March 1, 2012 at 3:05 pm

I thought snuff films went out of style.

Generation[redacted] March 1, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Don't mess with the Godfather. And don't ask what's in the pizza, neither.

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Leave the goldfish. Take the canoli.

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Here's Herman Cain, throwing gasoline on a pile of dogshit. What will happen? Who knows? Who gives a fuck?

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 3:46 pm

That's not a nice thing to do to Mitt Romney.

SayItWithWookies March 1, 2012 at 3:06 pm

I like how it ends with Herman Cain facing his electoral prospects.

YasserArraFeck March 1, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Add bedwetting and fire starting, and we have trouble

nounverb911 March 1, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Herman Cain wets his bed?

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

He's getting kind of old. The ejaculate happens hours after the orgasm now.

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:07 pm

I really hope she doesn't drive a Volkswagon.

sharethegrief March 1, 2012 at 3:42 pm

Trouble's already here. She lives with her parents who thought this was o.k. The dog might be next.

HelmutNewton March 1, 2012 at 3:06 pm

"I'm Herman Cain. And If you elect me, I'll turn America into this post-apocalyptic Hellscape."

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 3:10 pm

That's just fucked up. Hey Pizza man, if my wife ever sees this she's gonna stab you with a broken bottle and ask your dumb ass if you have "ANY QUESTIONS?"

user-of-owls March 1, 2012 at 3:06 pm

Oh to be a fly on the wall when the unbalanced kiddies at ALF headquarters lay their eyes on this.

Barrelhse March 1, 2012 at 3:54 pm

They'd probably pull your wings off.

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 4:04 pm

Alf headquarters? They'll probably wish it involved eating cats instead.

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:07 pm

We the people are Sick of Stimulus!

Speak for yourself, Herman. I for one like to be stimulated. Multiple times, in fact.

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 3:14 pm

And how! :)

user-of-owls March 1, 2012 at 3:19 pm

You're dreamy.

Not_So_Much March 1, 2012 at 4:13 pm

Careful or he'll be grabbing your Judy Jetson ponytail as a handle…

Loaded_Pants March 1, 2012 at 4:47 pm

That's why I'm confused by this, wasn't Herm also a fan of stimulation?

nounverb911 March 1, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Needs more PETA.

anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Seriously, I sort of hope that they go after his ass.

OneDollarJuana March 1, 2012 at 3:41 pm

Hmm. They could. PETA got all upset when the Pike Place Market fish-thowing guys switched to a rubber fish (to mollify PETA) because it "disrespected" the fish.

anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:47 pm

No… what? Seriously? I love the rubber fish – especially when they throw it out at the tourists and it flops around on the floor and everyone screams.

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:57 pm

Is it as good as Tony Soprano's fish singing "Don't Rock the Boat?"

SudsMcKenzie March 1, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Today we are all that godamn goldfish.

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Man, those conservatives are recruiting them young. Future Junior League president material right there.

"No animals were harmed in the making of this commercial."

YasserArraFeck March 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Maybe not, but I suspect the little girl will be scarred for life

anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm
weej_bain March 1, 2012 at 3:08 pm

LBJ's daisy petal picker was better. This young lady was far too koi.

SayItWithWookies March 1, 2012 at 3:16 pm

She's a gourami of one.

LesBontemps March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

All right, all right, stop carping about it.

Lascauxcaveman March 1, 2012 at 4:01 pm

Got a bucket of dirt little girl? Dump salmon on that goldfish and put the poor thing out of it's misery. You look like the kind of kid that tortures small animals just for the halibut. I just hake you little monsters; you make me eel.

I hope you cod hell from your friends for doing this idiotic ad.

anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Stop! You're gilling me!

Mumbletypeg March 1, 2012 at 3:45 pm

Wookies you're not far from the truth; gourami include some types known as mouthbrooders.

Still doesn't give you the right to go actin' uppertii, as if you were one yourself.

UnholyMoses March 1, 2012 at 3:30 pm

Stop with the fish puns or I'll kick your bass …

Tundra Grifter March 1, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Unholy Moses:

You are right. Too much floundering around here!

[I would like some credit for not completely ripping off the great Kip Adotti's "Night in Atlantis" routine; after several beers I can still reel off most of it...]

CommieLibunatic March 1, 2012 at 3:36 pm

Ow. Oww… OOOOWWWW!!! I think this post gave me meningitis!

Have an upvote anyway.

gullywompr March 1, 2012 at 3:37 pm

It's un-BEAR-able.

user-of-owls March 1, 2012 at 3:09 pm

We the people are Sick of Stimulus!

I see Herman is trying to claim he's a person again.

Ducksworthy March 1, 2012 at 3:10 pm

Pedophishia? That's all I got out of that.

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 3:10 pm

It's too bad the "no animals were harmed in the making of this motion picture" rules apparently don't apply to political ads.

cheetojeebus March 1, 2012 at 3:11 pm

In the sequel she plays checkers with Death.
She kicks his ass.

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 4:26 pm

I'm pretty sure the Nixon's dog is dead.

cheetojeebus March 1, 2012 at 4:40 pm

Exactly. Think about it…is your mind blown yet?

Tundra Grifter March 1, 2012 at 4:43 pm

"Death Knocks," by Woody Allen.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:11 pm

(off camera) "Now, Becky Sue, you throw that bucket of water over that dying fish and recite the script just like we told you, or your kitty gets it *snickick*"

Tommmcattt March 1, 2012 at 3:11 pm

Oh, Jesus that is horrible. How could you do something like that? And I'm not at all happy about that fish either.

ManchuCandidate March 1, 2012 at 3:13 pm

Show a man an ad about a fish covered in mud and you stupefy him for a day. "Teach" a man to vote constantly against his best interests and the gubbiment will have to feed him for a lifetime until the 1% has enough of it.

AngryBlakGuy March 1, 2012 at 3:13 pm

…considering that torturing and killing small animals is the first sign of sociopath, I think they just created the next Ted Bundy for a political AD!

LesBontemps March 1, 2012 at 3:14 pm

Is Herman Cain now in the lady-growing business? Is that what this is about?

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:15 pm

That's what I wondered. My mom used to stick fish heads in the soil when she'd plant a garden. I thought maybe the little girl had roots.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:14 pm

Goldfish are people too, Herman my friend!

meatlofer March 1, 2012 at 3:15 pm

That's the way that Fucker rolls!

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:15 pm

Dammit Herman, I specifically said "NO anchovies!"

Lascauxcaveman March 1, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Please tell me your looks aren't as good as your snark. That would be pretty dangerous, in combo.

SorosBot March 1, 2012 at 4:53 pm

Oh they most certainly are.

Chet Kincaid March 1, 2012 at 3:16 pm

What the fuck?!

elfgoldsackring March 1, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Exactly. No-one said they couldn't be rhetorical questions.

LesBontemps March 1, 2012 at 3:43 pm

No matter how many times I click, it only lets me upfist you once.

proudgrampa March 1, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Please, help me understand. What is wrong with these people?

ManchuCandidate March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

That's what happens one lacks a basic understanding of how government works, science, math, psychology, any advancement of the 20th/21st century, the basics of US America history and are suffering from some sort of mental and emotional arrested development as well throw an attitude of entitlement, a touch of racism/regionalism/jingoism/nationalism mixed in a tub of fat and corn syrup.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Here's a book that will help

redarmyzombie March 1, 2012 at 4:39 pm
Loaded_Pants March 1, 2012 at 3:25 pm

Everything.

proudgrampa March 1, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Well, THAT says it all!

Dashboard Buddha March 1, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Simple – the banality of evil.

fuflans March 1, 2012 at 3:56 pm

dude spent a goodly portion of his adult life making crappy pizza and chasing white tail.

WiscDad March 1, 2012 at 3:18 pm

However we are NOT sick of condoms

Bently Thurgrew, III March 1, 2012 at 3:18 pm

I wish to annouce my run for the Republican nomination. I am sure most would consider the timing of my bid to be eleventh hour but I am the only candidate with the business experience and steadfast Conservative values to win the election in November.

Now, I want to extend my hand and a welcome to all of America's little people. Join me as we move forward. Forward for America. Just don't stand to close. You smell a bit.

Mumbletypeg March 1, 2012 at 3:19 pm

Feel the momentum-herman!

Oh wait, he's not in the running anymore. So what's the fucking point, pizza goblin?

EatsBabyDingos March 1, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Need a fish abused? Cain is able, no carping, and. as long as he doesn't flounder like his campaign, he will kick bass and roughy up the competition.

I'd a felt better if he was throwing himself on a lava flow. "Air"-boarding a goldfish is uncool.

gullywompr March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Airboarding FTW!

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 3:25 pm

From my perch, you seem to want to skate past the real question: Are Herman Cain's dating prospects so bad now that he's hanging out in schoolyards?

Barrelhse March 1, 2012 at 4:00 pm

He's a spineless jellyfish who only thinks about getting scrod, but his wife says she has a haddock.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 4:27 pm

So you're saying she's an alewife?

He could just go workout on the barbels until she gets betta. Wobbegong is the husband who tries to ram his sexy time down her trout! He might try to snapper head off!

Sue4466 March 1, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Given the success of the GOP's reliance on a 12 year old Grover Norquist to draft their tax policy, why wouldn't the GOP listen to the economic insights of a child too young to pronounce the word "economy" or to recognize she's killing her pet?

mavenmaven March 1, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Was that his Breitbart eulogy?

anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Needless capitalization of nouns = sure sign of a nut.

Or Hitler.

elfgoldsackring March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Not Just Nouns, Everythings!

gullywompr March 1, 2012 at 3:21 pm

Filmed on location in George W. Bush National Wildlife Area.

Deportably_Jose March 1, 2012 at 3:22 pm

That analogy is as tortured as Herb Cain wishes every single Muslim was.

Goonemeritus March 1, 2012 at 3:23 pm

Well to reach is target demographic you need to bite the heads off a few chickens.

Oblios_Cap March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Bats work better.

Not_So_Much March 1, 2012 at 3:23 pm

I don't think they're really committed if they're not willing to do a kitty crush video.

BarackMyWorld March 1, 2012 at 3:23 pm
anniegetyerfun March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm
HistoriCat March 2, 2012 at 10:31 am

And that is why I try to change the subject whenever one of my kids expresses an interest in fishing.

Lucidamente1 March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

First Bretibart, now this.

EatsBabyDingos March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

He's just parroting Newt's party line, because Cain is "his blubber's keeper."

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

They cut off the end where Herman casts a bunch of fireballs from his staff, turns to the camera, and says "There are some who call me… Herm."

Dashboard Buddha March 1, 2012 at 3:24 pm

Mutherfucking fucker…I would punch Cain in the throat for this ad. Seriously…you had to torture a fish to make a non-point. You fucking prick…you unutterable shitheel. THIS is precisely why I like animals more than people.

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 3:38 pm

In Herman's defense, the fish would have done the same thing if it were Herman on the ground. So would most Americans for that matter.

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 4:37 pm

I support DBBuddha punching Cain in the throat/My wife stabbing him with a broken bottle 2012. Also

BlueStateLibel March 1, 2012 at 6:54 pm

As I commented about the Romney brat with his goldfish, I see a shark in Cain's future come to deliver karma.

DerrickWildcat March 1, 2012 at 3:25 pm

He could totally get President Romney to appoint him to the President of the Army.

johnnyzhivago March 1, 2012 at 3:31 pm

He just wants to hang out with all the Secretaries.

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 4:38 pm

Then they strap a dolphin to the roof of the Presidential Limo and take the family to DickMe Land.

Mahousu March 1, 2012 at 3:25 pm

Yeah, I'm sick of stimulus, too. Total economic collapse is so much better. Just ask any Greek.

Mumbletypeg March 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Herm doesn’t realize what great ideas this gives to the remaining GOP preznit campaigns:

Santorum: flush the fish down the toilet <<>> wasteful gov’t spending
Ron Paul: tie 2 fish’s tails together and leave ‘em to duke it out in their Freedom Fishbowl
Newt: put the fishbowl w/ fish still inside into the freezer for the slow death panel salute
Romney: fish trapped in water bottle <> – Already done: FISH TORTURE LIBEL Mitt! You’d better act fast~

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Metaphor fail.

MissTaken March 1, 2012 at 3:27 pm

I guess the goldfish didn't want the job either?

Fare la Volpe March 1, 2012 at 3:39 pm

You are filthy today. I approve oh so heartily.

JackDempsey1 March 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm

I love the absolute faith in Minimalism.
I get the feeling that Cain believes you could truly understand the essence of the the energy crisis (or anything else) using an empty egg crate, a cabbage, and a garden hose.

johnnyzhivago March 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm

Should have been toppings on a Pizza, not mud on a goldfish!

We want solutions not Stimulus – Except on our Pizza! Extra toppings are free this week only!

Chet Kincaid March 1, 2012 at 3:30 pm

Cain has released the next chapter of this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtHvetGnOdM

(I know, more dignity in his left front toe than Herman…)

KeepFnThatChicken March 1, 2012 at 3:32 pm

Yelly Breitbart spawn is yelly

JackDempsey1 March 1, 2012 at 3:34 pm

My avatar is writing his congressman.

Generation[redacted] March 1, 2012 at 3:37 pm

Future serial killer right there. Puppies are next.

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:39 pm

"It's a good thing little Jenny likes these 'pet funerals' so much."
-Old Gahan Wilson cartoon.

SpiderCrab March 1, 2012 at 3:40 pm

That young lady wasn't spanked enough when it still could have helped.

YasserArraFeck March 1, 2012 at 3:42 pm

What else are you going to do, standing above a huge canyon, but yell "I. AM. HERMAN. CAIN!!!" and listen to the echoed "cain….cain…..cain….ain….ain….in….in….n…..n" fade away, leaving only zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 3:42 pm

Everyone here is totally misinterpreting this ad. See, the goldfish represents the 1%, and the water she pours on it represents more tax cuts.

Extemporanus March 1, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Dude, that was fucking EPIC!

Loaded_Pants March 1, 2012 at 4:59 pm

Cain wants it all but he can't have it.

Doktor Zoom March 1, 2012 at 3:51 pm

I'm kind of hoping that the creator of Hyperbole and a Half sues him for painfully unfunny copyright infringement.

OneYieldRegular March 1, 2012 at 3:58 pm

"Cut! Dammit, she's supposed to light a cigarette at the end. What do I hire you people for?"

fuflans March 1, 2012 at 3:58 pm

demon sheep would have kicked that little girl's ass.

Doktor Zoom March 1, 2012 at 4:00 pm

A Fish Names Whaaaaaa?

Limeylizzie March 1, 2012 at 4:01 pm
Chet Kincaid March 1, 2012 at 4:18 pm

Not one word from Obama about Jesus, at this Easter event?! Typical!!

Limeylizzie March 1, 2012 at 5:15 pm

You know they will have something to say about this.

Chet Kincaid March 1, 2012 at 6:11 pm

Rolling away stones on the White House lawn looking for empty shrouds wouldn't have the same "kid-appeal."

BaldarTFlagass March 1, 2012 at 4:03 pm

Cain: "I have been to the mountaintop!!!"

starfanglednut March 1, 2012 at 8:45 pm

I's rather read a letter of his from the Birmingham jail.

YouBetcha March 1, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Flopping goldfish is my favorite pizza topping.

Neoyorquino March 1, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Just one question – what the fucking fuck was that? Or, http://youtu.be/TM-G0bkl8MQ

hagajim March 1, 2012 at 4:22 pm

Did Herman ask the little girl if she wanted a "job" afterward?

mormos March 1, 2012 at 4:23 pm

Incidentally, Dark Lord is what Hermain Cain would make women call him while he sexual harassed them.

SenileAgitation March 1, 2012 at 4:36 pm

Well, little psycho girl, yes, my question is what the fuck are you thinking? You dump your fish out then pour water on it to, what, taunt it? That's messed up. And misguided. Nobody cares about the 3 year old stimulus that saved the economy. Except your lecherous master Herman, the dude standing behind you on that mountain talking to nobody? You should stay away from him. And next time Mom and Dad say it's OK to go with him and just say what he tells you to? Run away from home. Hell, you can stay here. The Wonketeers will take care of you until CPS arranges a nice foster family for you.

Troglodeity March 1, 2012 at 4:44 pm

I liked Romney's ad better: you know, the one with the Irish Setter strapped on top of a station wagon.

Generation[redacted] March 1, 2012 at 4:45 pm

"This is the economy strapped to the roof of an auto bailout moving down the freeway at 70mph"

redarmyzombie March 1, 2012 at 4:47 pm

So, who else here is familiar with the Macdonald Triad?

Tundra Grifter March 1, 2012 at 4:48 pm

You say "goldfish," I say "sushi."

This is just a logical extention of the Chinese woman in the yellow shirt commercial. "Yellowtail," I believe it was…

lochnessmonster March 1, 2012 at 5:01 pm

PETA is going to be all over this!

FlexPerks March 1, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Give an asshole a sweater vest and he thinks he owns the world.

MinAgain March 1, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Sick of stimulus? Obviously, this ad was not made by a 16 year old boy.

ttommyunger March 1, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Herman who?

ClydeMydia March 1, 2012 at 11:40 pm

I've been waiting YEARS for the next Ingmar Bergman flick……………….moor please!

Negropolis March 2, 2012 at 12:01 am

You see what President Obama did to that precious, little white girl and her precious pet goldfish? He stole her innocence; he's corrupting our lil' snowflakes with stimulus, y'all!

Herman, you are one vile motherfucker with your dog-whistle imagery. All that's missing is a strung-out Playboy bunny.

bhobg March 3, 2012 at 4:08 pm

Is it wrong if this ad turns me on?

Oh, wait, never mind, that's easy – yes, that's very wrong, I need to get that checked out sooner rather than later.

In other topics, why tf is Herman Cain still making commercials?

WunkRocker March 1, 2012 at 4:20 pm

Can Joe prove he is not a illegal space alien here to suck all the U.S. American donkey cock and bring those vital juices back to him home world of OhFistMyBum? Can he?! The offense rests.

actor212 March 1, 2012 at 4:22 pm

AND. ALL. ONE. PERSON.

redarmyzombie March 1, 2012 at 4:30 pm

Now you see, this is why we can't have nice things!

Neoyorquino March 1, 2012 at 5:27 pm

And, while we're at it: sploosh.

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