Google ‘Spreading Santorum’ A Little Less When It Comes To Rick Santorum

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Former Pennsylvania (?) Senator Rick Santorum initially rose to prominence when it was discovered that his last name is — go figure! — a perfect homonym with “santorum,” the frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex. So what a stroke of luck for his presidential campaign, that they could take advantage of this link between the candidate’s name and the act he spends 60% of his waking hours contemplating/working to outlaw (when it occurs between unordained homosexual men, at least). Buddy, you can’t buy name recognition like that!

Sadly, as of today(ish), searching Google for “santorum” will no longer generate SpreadingSantorum.com, the first and most reputable site to document this connection, as the first #1 top result. Why? Well, in the dank corners of the Internet where such things are studied, theories abound. In our dank corner of the Internet, however, we must return, always, always, to the horse race and ask, Is this the end for the Santorum campaign? How will Rick ever rebound? Is it too late to maybe talk about the gays some more? [Search Engine Land via Balloon Juice]

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55 comments

  1. nounverb911

    Time to overthrow our Googlistic overlords and replace them with someone that will keep santorum in its rightful place.

  2. Barb

    "Is it too late to maybe talk about the gays some more?"
    I love gay people, or as I like to call them, "people"

      1. MinAgain

        Probably. I mean, can you imagine a straight corporation coming up with the entries for the Victoria's Secret Runway show?

    1. Loaded_Pants

      "It’s unfortunate that we have someone who obviously has some issues. But he has an opportunity to speak," said Santorum.
      I feel the same way about you, Dumbface Whinyvoice Sweatervest.

      Like you have no issues yourself. I can think of:
      1) Stupid
      2) Crazy
      3) Clueless
      And that's just first three items on the list.

      1. tessiee

        I really think "woman hating", "religious fanatic", and "sex phobic" should be ahead of "clueless" on that list.

  3. johnnyzhivago

    As a person actively involved in looking at Google results for clients, let me just say this – it's easier to attribute to malice what's more accurately explained by stupidity – or in this case Google.

  4. RadioCualquier

    I'm shocked and dismayed to think that a mega-corporation like google would do something dubious. I'm sure there were no discussions in quiet rooms. No "crony" capitalism here.
    Yep, Santorum could always use a little SOPA.

    1. Ducksworthy

      Wild Bill Bennett of Vegas fame? Has he ever been wrong? Thank Gawd addictive gambling is a a fundamental Amurrikan male value, otherwise we'd have to stop hearing from this douche-head.

  5. littlebigdaddy

    Yes, but as the Internet is a series of tubes and Google is, like, I guess, the valves (?) of the series of tubes, doesn't that mean that the santorum will erupt someplace else, like maybe unexpectedly on The View?

  6. Spurning Beer

    There seems to be a problem with linking to a site on the spreading of santorum. I tried three times, and the comments vaporized.

    Would something happen if that link were included in a comment?

      1. bravo_sierra

        You're on the right track. It isn't enough to link to the correct definition of Rick Santorum, you have to link key words that people would use in a search.

        Also, I've found Google search results are at least some what tailored to my search history, so don't be too excited if you see spreadingsantorum.com back where it rightfully belongs – others might not get it as the first result.

  7. Data Exactly

    Spreading Santorum is a good site. It should be the top result on every search result. Fecal matter is pretty fun, also. Give us more of that too, Google!

  8. ttommyunger

    O.T: Passing by wife's Lady Cave tonight, overheard Stephen Tyler commend Idol contestant for her "money shot". Wondering now if I should be watching American Idol after all.

    1. tessiee

      Why was Steven Tyler in your wife's lady cave?
      And while you were home, no less?
      If you ask me, they've both got a hell of a nerve!

      1. flamingpdog

        If Steven Tyler were in my ex-wife's lady cave, he'd probably be looking for an elderly Bruce Wayne in costume.

  9. tessiee

    It really doesn't matter if http://spreadingsantorum.com/ is no longer the first result on google for http://spreadingsantorum.com/. It doesn't even matter if http://spreadingsantorum.com/ never comes up (tee hee) again. The damage is done. For the next hundred years, at least, nobody will ever hear the name "Santorum" without thinking of http://spreadingsantorum.com/ and snickering, and it would be hard (tee hee) to think of a more richly deserved punishment.

    And can we all take a moment to say, "Good job, Dan Savage!"?

  10. GodShammgod

    The fun irony is that most santorum comes from straights who don't know how to do anal sex correctly.

    (And yep, I'm back).

  11. DahBoner

    Just the other day, I had to correct one of America's yout, who referred to "booty juice".

    The kids these days…

  12. tcaalaw

    The day when America's school children won't be able to quickly learn from a Google search that "santorum" means a "frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the by-product of anal sex" will be a sad day indeed.

  13. Nostrildamus

    Here's a quick and easy. Every time a winger shows up on Wonkette, trace their profile back to the their winger blogs and post something like this (more sites, higher rank):

    Uh-oh Barry! Santorum is going to mop the floor with the Kenyan this November.

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