SNOWBILLY BOOK NEWS  10:56 am February 27, 2012

Todd Palin’s Alleged Prostitute Releasing Exciting Book About Sex With Todd Palin

by Wonkette Jr.

Somehow, the Wasilla gravy train has finally run out of steam. What else can explain Todd Palin’s alleged Wasilla mistress/prostitute not getting a six-figure book deal for her story? America has finally grown tired of Sarah Palin and her snowbilly family’s oxycontin exploits. But, just in case you need a final dose, be sure to buy the hawt new paperback Boys Will Be Boys by Shailey Tripp. (Tripp?)

Boys Will Be Boys: Media, Morality and the Cover-up of the Todd Palin Shailey Tripp Sex Scandal is the true story of how Shailey Tripp, a young single mother of two special needs children became sexually involved with Todd Palin, husband of former Alaska Governor and 2008 GOP Vice-Presidential nominee, Sarah Palin.

This book explains the many factors that culminated in Shailey becoming not only the mistress of ” Alaska’s First Dude” but also a prostitute working for him which ultimately resulted in Shailey being arrested in March of 2010.

We are already burning our copies of John Muir’s Travels In Alaska and Jack London’s The Call of the Wild, because the modern home library only has so much shelf space for quality Alaskan literature. [Boys Will Be Boys/Sarah's Scandals]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 143 comments }

Come here a minute February 27, 2012 at 10:59 am

Todd's weird sexual behavior? Instead of "motorboating", "snow-machining".

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:46 am

Nah uh. "Ice fishing"

It involves a skinny rod and a cold hole, and power tools

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 12:13 pm

That was awesome.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 12:14 pm

*curtsies*

BornInATrailer February 27, 2012 at 12:33 pm

And the only way it is appealing as an activity is if you drink too.

chicken_thief February 27, 2012 at 11:54 am

Also "backpacking" on the "southern slopes". Too.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 12:07 pm

That reminds me of one of my favorite Ernie Kovacs' bits: " 'I'm heading to Canada for some winter sports, and I want to know, is it pronounced "skiing" or "she-ing" '? Well, that depends on what you're going to Canada for."

Neoyorquino February 27, 2012 at 1:56 pm

Upvote for Ernie Kovacs reference.

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 12:17 pm

Tough sledding?

Beetagger February 27, 2012 at 11:00 am

I hope it comes out on Kindle.

nounverb911 February 27, 2012 at 11:03 am

Sarah wants to use it as kindling.

nounverb911 February 27, 2012 at 11:02 am

When does it come that Todd is full of santorum?

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 11:17 am

That's our Wonkette; the first question is always "was there buttsex?"

mannacler February 27, 2012 at 3:26 pm

(sp) buttsechs

orygoon February 27, 2012 at 11:04 am

"Shailey"? Girl or boy?

nounverb911 February 27, 2012 at 11:04 am

"And don't call be Shailey."

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 10:49 pm

Is it a cold? Or a lisp?

PubOption February 27, 2012 at 11:17 am

Southern redneck parents meet an Alaska registrar?

Guppy February 27, 2012 at 11:20 am

It's either a boy or it's fiction.

RadioSBJ February 27, 2012 at 11:32 am

"Tripp," girl or boy?

starfanglednut February 27, 2012 at 9:49 pm

All of 'em.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:46 am

Yes.

OkieDokieDog February 27, 2012 at 11:05 am

Sanctity of marriage! White superiority!

Nope, just snowbilly trash being hillbilly trash… but with snow.

Guppy February 27, 2012 at 11:21 am

"but with snow."

I thought the slang term was "ice."

EloquentScience February 27, 2012 at 11:06 am

I guess Todd likes mothers with special needs children.

not that Dewey February 27, 2012 at 11:19 am

That's just about the weirdest fetish I've ever heard of. (of course, the all-knowing, all-seeing Rule 34 has already accounted for this)

Rosie_Scenario February 27, 2012 at 11:43 am

Of course, because Todd fathers the special needs children. Coincidence? I think not.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:52 am

BRISTOL LIBEL!

deanbooth February 27, 2012 at 12:38 pm

On hearing of Sarah's choice as McCain's running mate, Todd was heard to exclaim, "I'm going to the Special Olympics!"

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 11:06 am

Just imagine, if Walnuts had won in 2008 the VP's husband could have become America's First Pimp.

RadioSBJ February 27, 2012 at 11:36 am

I was thinking First Dud.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:57 am

Hey, man! Pimpin' ain't easy! Lay off tha playah!

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 12:12 pm

It is hard out there for a pimp, just tryin' to make the money to pay the rent.

ifthethunderdontgetya February 27, 2012 at 11:07 am

Somehow, the Wasilla gravy train has finally run out of steam

That's not steam!

(But it does begin with S.)
~

MissTaken February 27, 2012 at 11:07 am

Shailey becoming not only the mistress of ” Alaska’s First Dude” but also a prostitute working for him

Wow, going from 'mistress' to 'prostitute'. I guess in Alaska they like their Pretty Woman with a touch of Memento. Who knew?

Chichikovovich February 27, 2012 at 11:13 am

I guess in Wasilla the hooker trade has unpaid internships.

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 11:16 am

Pretty Woman told me it's every young woman's dream to become a prostitute, then find some rich sugar daddy to live off of. Isn't that your fantasy?

jus_wonderin February 27, 2012 at 11:27 am

I could go for the sugar daddy/mama thing. I need a secure retirement.

MissTaken February 27, 2012 at 11:30 am

Much to my parents' dismay, no.

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 11:50 am

So the movies lie? Unpossible!

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Yeah, well, she's got it kinda backwards in this case, then. FIRST you're a prostitute, THEN you're a mistress.

bureaucrap February 27, 2012 at 11:38 am

According to South Park, the term is "bottom bitch".

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:47 am

She went from a heart of gold to a pocket full.

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Actually, it poses a very interesting question: Did Toad not have to pay for sex initially, and then she put him on a paying footing? Or was she actually *working FOR* Toad, as in, passing him a portion of her earnings.

It would sort of lend a little weight to the ongoing rumour that Sairey is filing divorce papers right now.

hagajim February 27, 2012 at 11:08 am

Special needs kids? Does this mean that the Tawd is firing slightly off-kilter bullets? Heck, I thought it was Mama Grizzly that was responsible for the special needs kid – now maybe we know different.

Chillwillard February 27, 2012 at 11:08 am

Wasilla is like a giant septic tank that is constantly overflowing.

WinterOuthouse February 27, 2012 at 11:10 am

Poor Tawd. He just can't catch a break. The Palin slide down the Northslope is messy indeed.

Chichikovovich February 27, 2012 at 11:10 am

"Shailey Tripp. (Tripp?)"

Shailey is Linda Tripp's masseuse-name. She needed a new profession now that the wingnut welfare for recording the private girl-talk she shared with Monica and giving it to the special prosecutor has run dry.

flamingpdog February 27, 2012 at 11:32 am

I really have to stop eating breakfast while reading Wonkette.

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 10:54 pm

Yes. You do.

I'm surprised you didn't know this, dood.

RadioSBJ February 27, 2012 at 11:38 am

She was uglier than TRIsomyG's diaper.

WinterOuthouse February 27, 2012 at 11:11 am

Needs moar meth

littlebigdaddy February 27, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Oh, I suspect it's got plenty.

Goonemeritus February 27, 2012 at 11:11 am

Nothing says family values like Chlamydia.

Guppy February 27, 2012 at 11:26 am

I thought nothing said "family values" like a Hapsburg Jaw.

StarsUponThars February 27, 2012 at 11:13 am

Down, breakfast, down.

BaldarTFlagass February 27, 2012 at 11:13 am

That First Dude sure can pull.

freakishlywrong February 27, 2012 at 11:14 am

Henghhhhhhhh…these people. And all conservatives. Really, just go the fuck away.

Mahousu February 27, 2012 at 11:15 am

I was going to make a joke about Todd's "special needs," except it's probably not a joke.

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:59 am

It's not short, it's developmentally challenged

(…and yes the deleted commented used the "r" word….)

freakishlywrong February 27, 2012 at 11:16 am

From the site:
Authored with Vickie Bottoms
I shit you not.

littlebigdaddy February 27, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Is that S.P.'s porn name?

BaldarTFlagass February 27, 2012 at 11:18 am

Was the town of Wasilla invented by Harold Robbins and Jackie Collins?

old_phineas February 27, 2012 at 1:40 pm

No. It was Hunter Thompson and Boccaccio.

prommie February 27, 2012 at 11:21 am

Can't possibly be worse than Bristol's book.

flamingpdog February 27, 2012 at 11:35 am

I sincerely hope your comment is not an indication you actually read Bristle's book.

FakaktaSouth February 27, 2012 at 11:48 am

I'm just trying to figure out why B-Money named her kid after her dad's whore AND not hate myself for knowing all these people's names.

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 11:03 pm

Tough job, girl.

RadioSBJ February 27, 2012 at 11:48 am

Wait, Tawd nailed his daughter?

ProChoiceGramma February 27, 2012 at 11:28 am

I think it is hilarious that Levi named his son "Tripp" – how much you wanna bet Levi (and every teen boy in Wasilla) knew about Shailey Tripp? And that Levi knew or suspected that Todd had also frequented Ms. Tripp's servicing? Bristol had no idea the significance of the name "Tripp", but it was Levi's virtual punch in the face to Todd and Sarah! Did you notice how quickly after Tripp was born that Bristol broke up with Levi??

Congrats Levi! You cleverly managed to one-up the Palins!

elburritodeluxe February 27, 2012 at 11:28 am

Why would this former Alaska prostitute diminish herself by associating with the Palins?

LesBontemps February 27, 2012 at 11:29 am

Ew, gross. That is all.

2161911 February 27, 2012 at 11:29 am

But, congratulations to Sarah Palin for taking home the Oscar for best documentary, "The Undefeated"

FakaktaSouth February 27, 2012 at 11:31 am

Well this does explain the Ron Paul bumper sticker on the back of Todd's snowmobile. SNOWMOBILE.

edgydrifter February 27, 2012 at 11:40 am

Exactly. A snow machine makes snow, which seems unnecessary in Alaska and really difficult and pointless to race on.

Mumbletypeg February 27, 2012 at 11:38 am

So this is what gathers at the bottom of the scrap heap that dogged journalist whiz kids muck through on behalf of a worn out story-generator: *gasp!* more white trash.

There seems to be an inverse relationship between the serial Quitter and the related parties who don't know when to quit, also and too (much).

ifthethunderdontgetya February 27, 2012 at 11:38 am
FlownOver February 27, 2012 at 1:57 pm

More of that man-on-dog stuff, eh? Which is which?

Nostrildamus February 27, 2012 at 2:12 pm

Any time Romney's in heat, it's a dead heat.

Biff February 27, 2012 at 10:41 pm

My scanner finally figured out your avatar.

Well done.

An_Outhouse February 27, 2012 at 4:10 pm

gross !

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 11:05 pm

What HistoriCat said, dood.

Barb February 27, 2012 at 11:39 am

I'm sure Todd and Sarah will say they will sue and then they won't sue. They never do and that has got to make you wonder.

ttommyunger February 27, 2012 at 1:28 pm

I've never spent a millisecond wondering-I am convinced.

sillywhabbit February 27, 2012 at 9:17 pm

I believe Shailey would welcome the day that dirty-wig wearing, quitter would be stupid enough to sue.

bureaucrap February 27, 2012 at 11:41 am

With the exception of the Muir and London works cited above, it seems like alaska is just a never-ending pipeline of crap literature. It's a pity that trees have to give their lives for this effluence of wasted paper. On the other hand, it's a fortunate coincidence that Alaska clearly has a lot of trees to spare.

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 12:26 pm

it's even a shame that electrons have to give their lives to put this stuff on an ereader.

Blueb4sunrise February 27, 2012 at 11:43 am

from the creatspace link……

Trim Size: 6" x 9"

widestanceromance February 27, 2012 at 11:44 am

It must have been a nice change for Tawd to have sex without condoms. . .in his ears.

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 12:25 pm

- Faster!

Huh?

-Faster!!

Wha?

-Goddamit Todd, go faster!

Speak up baby

-You ridiculous homunculus GO FASTER!

-Todd?

-Todd?

ZZZzzzZZZzzz

actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:45 am

"Exciting" and "Todd Palin" have no business in the same sentence together, so there's your answer why she got no big ass advance.

weej_bain February 27, 2012 at 11:48 am

♪♫ She1ey Shailey comin' 'round Wuzsilluh when Todd cumz
Shailey comin' 'round Wuzsilluh when Todd cumz
She'd be cummin' with a grifter, if Todd's Iditarod wuz stiffer
Shailey comin' 'round Wuzsilluh when Todd cumz ♫♪

ProChoiceGramma February 27, 2012 at 11:49 am

I think it is hilarious that Levi named his son "Tripp" – how much you wanna bet Levi (and every teen boy in Wasilla) knew about Shailey Tripp? And that Levi knew or suspected that Todd had also frequented Ms. Tripp's servicing? Bristol had no idea the significance of the name "Tripp", but it was Levi's virtual punch in the face to Todd and Sarah! Did you notice how quickly after Tripp was born that Bristol broke up with Levi??

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Didn't you JUST say that? I mean, like, in this very same thread?

ProChoiceGramma February 28, 2012 at 7:39 am

Well hey, glad you were paying attention. ;-) My first comment was in "moderation" for more than an hour.

FROTHY February 28, 2012 at 1:35 pm

I think I know you from Twitter.

Callyson February 27, 2012 at 11:50 am

Boys Will Be Boys tells the whole story from Shailey's viewpoint and includes the evidence.
Really, didn't the wingnuts learn from Bill Clinton not to leave anything behind?

chicken_thief February 27, 2012 at 11:50 am

I thought "Shailey Tripp" was Bristol's "Irish masseuse" name….

RedneckMuslin February 27, 2012 at 11:52 am
actor212 February 27, 2012 at 11:56 am

Just saw the photos:

Squat, hairy-lipped, bad unkempt hair, horrible clothing…and that's just Todd!

Tundra Grifter February 27, 2012 at 12:02 pm

Sounds to me like a very bad Tripp.

Beowoof February 27, 2012 at 12:04 pm

Although it may sound as if I am not supportive of the sanctity of marriage, I have to say that if I am Todd banging any woman other than Sarah would seem like a vacation from sex with a lumpy sack of potatoes.

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 12:22 pm

I just saw the picture of the author. It was more of a lateral switch..much like eschewing russetts for an Idaho.

Beowoof February 27, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I don't know I don't think the fill in comes with that voice or attitude. That would seem to be a huge upgrade.

Dashboard Buddha February 27, 2012 at 1:45 pm

I say potato, you say screaming hell beast…(4 out of 5 snarkers choose potato)—

Beowoof February 27, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Well Sarah does have the IQ of a potato so you have me there.

Tundra Grifter February 27, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Opening with "Authored by Shailey M. Tripp; Authored with Vickie Bottoms" just doesn't bode well for the quality of the writing.

"Authored by?" Good Grief!

SayItWithWookies February 27, 2012 at 12:17 pm

The nation's prostitutes and pimps would like to formally ask the Palins to stop giving their noble professions such a bad reputation.

Redhead February 27, 2012 at 12:23 pm

I'm actually, genuinely shocked that when the inevitable happened, it was a female adult. I truly thought it would be him, Sarah and Bristol competing for the same guy.

chicken_thief February 27, 2012 at 12:31 pm

I can hardly wait for the book by Shailey's sister-in-law's cousin's butcher's son who knew a close friend of Shailey during her high school years that will provide the prequel to this sure to be best seller.

BornInATrailer February 27, 2012 at 12:42 pm

Calling it right now. The name of Todd's special needs child was his choice and his way of honoring his lover/ice prostitute Shailey.

mavenmaven February 27, 2012 at 12:46 pm

A story like "Pretty Lady" but opposite and in reverse. Bizarro Julia Roberts!

el_donaldo February 27, 2012 at 12:50 pm

"Boys Will Be Boys," by Tripp and Bottoms. That's it; I just wanted to say it.

DahBoner February 27, 2012 at 1:11 pm

What a Tripp, man….

ttommyunger February 27, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Odd, Todd certainly didn't need to stray to get some "strange".

redarmyzombie February 27, 2012 at 2:03 pm

well you know, they'll come out of the rain, but they *never* remember your name…

redarmyzombie February 27, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Shaily…Shaaaillly…hmmmm…

Is that like, a cross between Sapphire, Halley, and Bailey?

GhostBuggy February 27, 2012 at 3:09 pm

Bristle? Is that like gristle? (A: Yes.)

ElPinche February 27, 2012 at 4:59 pm

Todd would rather go to pound town with a thick ass brown girl…hey, at least me and Todd have something in common. We both like chimichangas.

MinAgain February 27, 2012 at 6:01 pm

It's hard out here for a pimp.

tcaalaw February 28, 2012 at 2:49 am

Needs more happy endings, in my opinion.

Chichikovovich February 27, 2012 at 11:18 am

The page makes a compelling case, to be sure, but personally I prefer the subtle understatement of the same poster's "Unmasking the Coup":
http://obamaosamabidenbinladen.blogspot.com/

GhostBuggy February 27, 2012 at 12:12 pm

Well, this is a new one.

Redhead February 27, 2012 at 12:28 pm

"Unelected officials took over Washington and the media following the coup and cover up."

Well that's news to me. I certainly wasn't aware that my job had been taken over by an unelected official (Henh???)

HempDogbane February 27, 2012 at 1:15 pm

Wonketeers who wish to read the question "Does Gayle King bare any resemblance to singer Whitney Houston?" should click on that link. It is positioned directly beneath photos of the two, so you may wish to look at them for a moment. This is the internet, after all.

imissopus February 27, 2012 at 7:47 pm

You forgot the reverse vampires. WHY DOES EVERYONE ALWAYS FORGET THE REVERSE VAMPIRES???!!!! THEY ARE LEGION!! GAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

FROTHY February 27, 2012 at 10:56 pm

I'd forgotten about you, you crazy person.

Isyaignert February 28, 2012 at 1:01 am

You're so right! Even her glasses are fake. When she first started wearing them, her eye surgeon contacted her to find out why she was wearing glasses when he had just performed Lasik surgery on her. I guess she thought they made her look smarter. But, it's going to take more than glasses to make her not be a fidiot.

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 11:24 am

Some people look kind of like other people, therefore they're secretly the same person and part of the conspiracy!

TweetOnThis February 27, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Nice diversion, try again

RedneckMuslin February 27, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Man, where was I? Vaginas are my favorite.

TweetOnThis February 27, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Your job doing what? Attacking, discrediting, and diverting attention from the truth leaking out? Your job at Newsweek where you lie on message boards? What job is that? It's obviously not reporting on the truth.

TweetOnThis February 27, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Was that in English?

TweetOnThis February 27, 2012 at 1:54 pm

And you call yourself SorosBot? Who did you think was being exposed in that story? You act like people cannot ever conspire to do anything. Anyone seen on that page is part of a code whether or not they choose to be.

Redhead February 27, 2012 at 2:28 pm

"Anyone seen on that page is part of a code whether or not they choose to be. "

Hmmm…. The Onion or Not the Onion? Freeper commenter or Newell making fun of a Freeper commenter? This one actually has me stumped.

LakeLucilleLoon February 27, 2012 at 3:34 pm

Tweet's avatar kind of looks like Jodie Foster in a blond wig, OR a young Morgan Fairchild. Is this the real key to "the code"?

GhostBuggy February 27, 2012 at 2:36 pm

No, it was in Reptilian Moon-Speak.

What kind of conspiracy theorist doesn't even know that?

SorosBot February 27, 2012 at 3:32 pm

TweetOnThis has spread his/her crazy here before, though this is I think only the second time they've replied to us. Definitely a true believer, certified loon. But (s)he is funny.

Redhead February 27, 2012 at 4:02 pm

What makes you think I'm not a Congressman?

An_Outhouse February 27, 2012 at 4:08 pm

No shirtless pics?

starfanglednut February 27, 2012 at 9:56 pm

You'll have to tweet us all pictures of your dick, then we just might believe you're a congressman.

starfanglednut February 27, 2012 at 9:54 pm

Looks like schizophrenia to me. It's actually pretty sad.

FROTHY February 28, 2012 at 1:32 pm

Yup. When they start seeing and hearing secret messages everywhere … it is sad.

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