SHARE


You are so right, Republican National Committee attack ad, it is very bizarre that Barack Obama is busy singing while an overlay graphic indicates that gas prices continue to — oh wait, there he goes with that “come on,” right on cue! And so on pitch! Oh god that is a good song. Why don’t they write songs like that anymore? Did you hear that Mick Jagger endorsed Barack Obama for Queen of England, based on this performance? Oh crap, the video is already over. Uh, wait, so what happened with gas prices?

Who knows! Why is the RNC trying to make Americans pay attention to graphs when there are more interesting things happening, like singing and applause and singing? Maybe they were expecting Americans to feel the sort of instant boredom that Mitt Romney trying to cough out patriotic hymns to a tune inspires and that actually makes studying ominous graphs seem like a more interesting alternative.

Anyway, yes global oil prices are very high right now, and Barack Obama will do exactly what he and every other president have ever been able to do about it: effectively zero. (Or actually, he will mostly continue begging Israel not to launch strikes on Iran in order to avoid a global oil shock.) And if Rick Santorum becomes President, he will appoint Herman Cain to Secretary of Defense so that he can go nuke Iran 999 times and bring oil to over $999 a barrel forever, the end. [YouTube]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
Previous articleWhich Terrible Picture of Bill Maher vs. The Pope Won Our Ticket Contest?
Next articleWhy Is Obama Making Allen West Pay $70 To Refill His Hummer?