SHARE

Who the fuck came up with this? title=Mitt Romney was back in his home state of Michigan, where he lived 50 years ago, to deliver a hotly anticipated speech on his latest, most deeply considered plan to toss the American people another $3-$5 trillion in tax cuts while offsetting the cost by ???ing tax expenditures. The speech, hosted by the Detroit Economic Club, was held in that most ambitious of Michigan venues, Ford Field, the only structure capable of holding the tens of thousands of people who weren’t there.

What powerful optics for Mitt Romney today, giving his speech to the only 1,200 people with a positive net worth in the Detroit metropolitan area, in a football stadium that spectators will fill to the brim when watching the Lions go 0-16 but won’t come near when Mitt Romney books it to unveil his latest mega-pander.

But let’s not just focus on the hilarious empty stadium. Did he go out of his way to grow the awkwardness at an exponential pace, The Hill?

“I not only think I have the best chance, I think I have the only chance — maybe I’m overstating it a bit,” he said, chuckling awkwardly.

“That’s my family leading the applause,” he said quickly, although no one was clapping, then laughed again. No one appeared to laugh with him.

Jesus Christ. What could be worse? Maybe a paragraph combining… the most oft-mocked lines of his over the last couple of weeks but which still somehow remain in his stump speech with… an unnecessary anecdote about his half-dozen or so cars that only highlights his outrageous wealth with… an overall aura of very forced pandering that suggests everything he’s saying is a lie? Buzzfeed?

I actually love this state. This feels good being back in Michigan. You know, the trees are the right height, the streets are just right. I like the fact that most of the cars i see are Detroit-made automobiles. I drive a Mustang and a Chevy pickup truck. Ann drives a couple of Cadillacs. I used to have a dodge truck, so I used to have all three covered.

This is too much fun, sorry! We’re doing one more! Richard Adams at The Guardian, type!

Mitt Romney just claimed he could smell lunch “wafting into this room” – room being a very odd way to describe a massive 80,000-seat football stadium.

The real winner of the day/year, though, was CSPAN’s camera crew, who cut away from Romney for this slow pan of the emptiness surrounding him.

And so we laugh, at Mitt Romney. Because at least John McCain’s incoherent speech before a lime green backdrop was held in an appropriate-size venue.

[The Hill, Buzzfeed, The Guardian, image via Byron York]

$
Donate with CCDonate with CC
Previous articleJoin ‘Michigan Mitt’ Romney In This American Singalong (Friday Fun Video)
Next articleWhich Terrible Picture of Bill Maher vs. The Pope Won Our Ticket Contest?