Jeb Bush Is So Terrified Of Republicans

What's Jeb Bush, OLLLLL' JEBBIE, up to these days besides being rich and Mexican? He's not running for president, despite many urgings, because "his last name disqualifies him." He hasn't endorsed any candidate, most likely -- though we haven't verified this scientifically -- because they're all losers. (Just kidding, we have verified this scientifically.) Not just losers, butscarylosers. The Republican party candidates are too busy appealing to people's "fears and emotion," Bush says, to win a general election. Why can't these folks run positive, inclusive campaigns like the one that carried brother George W. Bush to reelection in 2004 over the gay French windsurfing Masshole fucko terrorist and bad soldier John Kerry?

Via the Warrrshington Post :

“I used to be a conservative and I watch these debates and I’m wondering, I don’t think I’ve changed, but it’s a little troubling sometimes when people are appealing to people’s fears and emotion rather than trying to get them to look over the horizon for a broader perspective and that’s kind of where we are,” former Florida governor Jeb Bush said in a Dallas speech Thursday, Fox News reported. “I think it changes when we get to the general election. I hope.”

In an interview with CBS News after the event, Bush added, “I think it’s important for the candidates to recognize they have to appeal to primary voters, and not turn off independent voters that will be part of a winning coalition.”

Ha, so yeah, he's completely traumatized. You can tell because if he weren't, this whole rabid anal circus of a primary season wouldn't matter. Bush Men have a secret constitutional right to just name themselves president at any time, if they'd like. But perhaps being president is just a shitty unfun thing to do.

[ Washington Post ]