COULD IT BE ... SATAN?  4:35 pm February 23, 2012

Here’s Some Sex Cartoon of the Devil Boning Rick Santorum Or Something

by Wonkette Jr.

Those Taiwanese animators are sure having some sexytime fun with Rick Santorum. It is important to wonder if these Taiwanese animators are even American, the way they attack our most precious institutions (Satan, Rick Santorum). [NMA.tv/YouTube]

 
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{ 66 comments }

nounverb911 February 23, 2012 at 4:37 pm

They left out the part where Santorum plays catch with his kids and Gabriel.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 4:39 pm

We're all going to hell.

nounverb911 February 23, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Florida?

DemmeFatale February 23, 2012 at 4:55 pm

I see you've been to "The Villages."

neiltheblaze February 23, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Arizona, possibly.

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 7:28 pm

As long as Santorumites aren't there, I'm cool.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 4:39 pm

The devil has too small of a dick to be Obama. That little blackout box would barely cover an acorn.

SoBeach February 23, 2012 at 4:50 pm

"The devil has too small of a dick to be Obama. That little blackout box would barely cover an acorn. "

That's how the devil fools you, son. Makes you think it ain't gonna hurt much, but once you turn your back, WAMMO. You've got satan's own fence post extracting your soul through your badkside like a giant crochet needle.

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 5:02 pm

Maybe he's a grower and not a shower.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:10 pm

WOOOO!

savethispatient February 23, 2012 at 4:41 pm

I loved the Mormon spaceship; I hadn't realised that Newt was a Mormon too!

nounverb911 February 23, 2012 at 4:44 pm

Newt's been through the gay mormon baptizing machine a few times already.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:49 pm

Thanks for the reminder. I just converted another dozen.

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 5:10 pm

MORMONS … IN … SPACE!

Damn that got me.

Guppy February 23, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Write a big enough check and Newt will be whatever you want him to be.

Gratuitous World February 23, 2012 at 4:44 pm

But Jeremy Lin gets first choice, right?

Callyson February 23, 2012 at 4:46 pm

Glad to see that NMA is back on top of its game.
As for the devil boning Rick Santorum, I guess that's one explanation for why the frothy mix has lasted so damn long…

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Santorum/Father Merrin 2012!

Barb February 23, 2012 at 4:57 pm

That's a minute and 15 seconds of my life that I want back, please.

HempDogbane February 23, 2012 at 6:08 pm

My first-ever clickee on a Wonkette video. And thanks to slow internet, that's about 3 minutes I want back.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 5:05 pm

If Satan is really attacking America, why does rock music suck so much now days?

emmelemm February 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Excellent question.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 6:53 pm

We should be in a great time for rock. We have wars, unemployment, bad economics, singers killing themselves with drugs and alcohol. These are the basic ingredients of great music. And you add Satan into the mix, we should be seeing the second coming of the Beatles, or at least something as fruitful as Seattle circa 1990.

It makes me weep that our dark lord and master can't pull the rock anymore. Maybe Keith Richards sucked it all out of him. It makes me weep.

BarryOPotter February 23, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Maybe Keith Richards sucked it all out of him.

Or maybe he shared a needle with Keef, and the D. Lord is all kinds of fucked out of his horn-ed skull. Or he's just chilling, working on some new material with Mick and the boys. Or he wants to finish work on the GO(T)P primary before moving on, cause he such a prissy little fallen angels who likes to get shit picture-fucking-perfect…

BaldarTFlagass February 27, 2012 at 8:38 am

Axl Rose is the devil?

BlueStateLibel February 23, 2012 at 7:22 pm

If you were spending all day buying bankers' souls left and right, do you think YOU would have time to inspire great music?! Hardly.

iburl February 23, 2012 at 9:43 pm

ADD Drugs killed Rock. These kids today with their mental health, bah!

starfanglednut February 23, 2012 at 10:44 pm

It's all that warbly, out of tune "indy" shit nowadays.

Oh, and get off mah lawn!

GOPCrusher February 24, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Instead we have fucking Coldplay.

Dashboard Buddha February 25, 2012 at 8:07 am

The music industry is more subtle and sophisticated now. It has legislators in its pocket…legislators that are are also in the pockets of polluting industries, arms dealers, and cranky evangelicals. This all combines to make music that keeps the majority of people oblivious and stupid. This in turn will hopefully turn music consumer's (there are no more music lovers) attention away from war, pollution, and born-again grifting.

There's a phrase in marketing…cross collaboration…cross selling…cross something.

It's working 'cuz it makes me pretty cross.

mavenmaven February 23, 2012 at 7:30 pm

Because he bought the industry.

Biel_ze_Bubba February 24, 2012 at 6:33 am

Because I've been working full time with Leonard Cohen.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 24, 2012 at 2:04 pm

While that is something to be applauded, you need to spread the wealth. Surely there are some teenagers that you can corrupt into great rock?

Biel_ze_Bubba February 25, 2012 at 3:08 am

There is this hot number I'm thinking has some promise.

BarackMyWorld February 23, 2012 at 5:10 pm

I have to admit my favorite part was the Scooby Doo sound effects at the end when everyone was running away.

Pragmatist2 February 23, 2012 at 5:10 pm

Honestly, you had me at "sex."

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 5:11 pm

Sorry Rick, but sensuality is a virtue, not a vice.

BarryOPotter February 23, 2012 at 7:15 pm

"No, Rick, it's "grab and twist." Grab…(that's it)… and twist."

Antispandex February 23, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Needs more santorum, and less Santorum.

1swellfoop February 23, 2012 at 5:25 pm

They missed the obvious, which MAD magazine, thankfully, did not. http://mad.blog.dccomics.com/2012/02/22/the-eerie

edgydrifter February 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Barry swings a flail about as well as he bowls, I see. Pathetic.

littlebigdaddy February 23, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Is there an Oscar category these guys qualify for (best computer animated political satire short under two minutes from an Asian country)? In their way, they are geniuses.

MiniMencken February 23, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Like the old saying goes, "Once you've tried Asia, you'll never have aphasia." Or, something like that. Love those NMA folks!

weej_bain February 23, 2012 at 5:39 pm

Obvs, Frothy gets fellatio and flossing confused.

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Satan got out just in time, right before Ashton Kutcher copped a feel of the blonde lady @:15.

"Hey, Ashton, My horns are up here!"

Tundra Grifter February 23, 2012 at 7:03 pm

When Li'l Ricky laid his hands on that young woman and she tipped over, it was quite thoughtful of the young man to not only catch her back but also to make sure her left boob didn't go anywhere.

Mondo_Cane February 23, 2012 at 7:12 pm

A Santorum campaign poster composed entirely of gay porn –
http://www.happyplace.com/14401/a-rick-santorum-c

starfanglednut February 23, 2012 at 10:46 pm

Hawt!

LettucePrey February 23, 2012 at 7:24 pm

Sofia Vergara is not a real person. She is a disguise that Bugs Bunny would wear to prank a matador.

RedneckMuslin February 24, 2012 at 7:59 am

May I borrow it for my wife?

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 7:31 pm

In reality, Santorum is a sucker of Satan's cock. Seriously. I there were a Satan and I were him, I wouldn't waste time trying to "wage a spiritual war". I would make asshats like Santorum, Falwell, Robinson, Swagger, et al make Christianity look like such a steaming pile of shit that people would renounce Jesus simply out of disgust. Luring people away with promises of promiscuity, worldly things, or buying souls is so 20th century. It's all about psyops now.

poorgradstudent February 23, 2012 at 7:44 pm

How did they get that footage from inside Santorum's fantasies?

chascates February 23, 2012 at 8:36 pm

That's how our country ends. Not with a bang, but with Chinese takeout.

ttommyunger February 23, 2012 at 11:52 pm

Satan boning Little Ricky? Satan Libel, fer sure.

Biel_ze_Bubba February 24, 2012 at 6:18 am

I approved this message.

DahBoner February 24, 2012 at 7:57 am

Does NMA stand for "No More Arsenio"???

JustPixelz February 24, 2012 at 10:13 am

Satan has really lowered his standards. I heard somewhere he was boning America for being too successful. But now he's boning a tool of the Papacy for being, well, a tool.

alzronnie February 24, 2012 at 10:18 am

I'd like to meet his tailor.

WiscDad February 24, 2012 at 10:26 am

Praise Zevon

WiscDad February 24, 2012 at 10:26 am

That's hilarious…why did they block Satan's dick…afraid he would make us all jealous?

elburritodeluxe February 24, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Taiwan's last President is sitting in jail right now. They think our politics are funny?

Chet Kincaid February 24, 2012 at 1:46 pm

There's your proof — like I said, "Assassin's Creed: Sanctum Santorum" is the worst game in the franchise!

MinAgain February 25, 2012 at 1:01 am

Okay, I give up. Who's the guy in the dress?

Dashboard Buddha February 25, 2012 at 8:08 am

It's never too late to hate Coldplay.

lulzmonger February 26, 2012 at 10:30 pm

NMA FTW !!!
(/WTF)

The music for this cartoon should be Santorum's theme song.

axmxz February 28, 2012 at 12:00 am

"Soon the 'Father of Lies' will take over the entire country."

Herodotus 2012?

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