NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR ANYTHING  1:29 pm February 23, 2012

Obama Apologizes To Foreign Leader For Bad Thing, Must Be Impeached

by Jim Newell

Hilldawg wouldn't apologizeAs Mitt Romney’s been saying for months now, this President loves going around the world to apologize for America, because apparently it’s wrong to liberate distant oppressed countries with freedom bombs, rainbow bullets, democracy shrapnel, and war… umm war… whatever. And today Mitt Romney is finally correct! President Obama has apologized in a letter to Afghan President Hamid Karzai for the big Koran garbage barbecue at Bagram the other day, which has led to terrible riots and death everywhere.

From the Times:

“I wish to express my deep regret for the reported incident,” Mr. Obama said in a letter to President Hamid Karzai. “I extend to you and the Afghan people my sincere apologies.”

The letter was handed to Mr. Karzai by the American ambassador to Afghanistan, Ryan C. Crocker, on Thursday afternoon in Kabul.

The acting spokesman for the American Embassy in Kabul, Mark Thornburg, confirmed that the letter had been hand delivered by Mr. Crocker to Mr. Karzai.

“The error was inadvertent,” Mr. Obama said. “I assure you that we will take the appropriate steps to avoid any recurrence, to include holding accountable those responsible.”

Wow, an apology and an assurance that he’ll punish some American soldiers for this! Let’s see how the right wing of American politics is taking this news with a quick jaunt over to Free Republic.

  • “The best thing we could do is pull out our troops, nuke the place back to the stone-age, declare victory and then tell every foreign country that Afghanistan is all theirs on a first come, first serve basis. “
  • “Actions like this will spell the end of Obama if word gets out through all the Lame Stream Media. Obama just proved everyone’s point that he hates America bad enough to apologize to a bunch of radical Islamist.”
  • “A 2000 lb cement brick should be dropped on the Kabala rock right now. With a warning that the next 2000 lb. item dropped on that spot will be live. But nobody with the authority to do so has the GUTS to do it.”
  • “We should replace troops on the ground one for one with nukes set off above ground. But save some for Mecca and Medina and the rest of their viper nests.”
  • “But then the media crawls all over Santorum for telling the truth: we are in the clutches of Satan and Obama is the facilitator…”
  • “I wipe my a.ss with pages of the koran,will B.O apologize on my behalf.”

[NYT]

 
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{ 264 comments }

Local_Mojo February 23, 2012 at 1:34 pm

We don't want to talk to them no more, those empty headed animal food trough wipers. We fart in their general direction. Their mothers were hamsters and their fathers smelt of elderberries.

HateMachine February 23, 2012 at 1:55 pm

You don't frighten us, Wingnut pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottoms, sons of a silly person!

finallyhappy February 23, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Monty python!

UnholyMoses February 23, 2012 at 2:22 pm

I blow my nose at you, so-called "Obama President," you and all your silly Liberal a-polo-gists!.

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Now go away, or I shall nuke you a second time!

Spurning Beer February 23, 2012 at 7:51 pm

Tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms!

ttommyunger February 23, 2012 at 1:34 pm

That last one can wipe anywhere he chooses, he's all asshole.

SayItWithWookies February 23, 2012 at 1:35 pm

A 2000 lb cement brick should be dropped on the Kabala rock right now.

And after that, it's a war on feng shui.

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Shuiah law libel!

SudsMcKenzie February 23, 2012 at 1:56 pm

… and then Wang Chung.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:46 pm
Swampgas_Man February 23, 2012 at 5:59 pm

And THEN. . . the Wu Tang Clan!

FraAnima February 23, 2012 at 2:43 pm

Kabala rock? Is that anything like Fraggle rock? If so, I'm all for dropping a concrete block on it…

Swampgas_Man February 23, 2012 at 6:01 pm

I owned a Kabala toy when I was a kid; green glowing Ouija board, w/ a big glowing eye in the middle, right? Man, those Moozlims are so lucky to have that, it's cooler than the Vatican.

Chet Kincaid February 23, 2012 at 10:10 pm

All over the country, at any time of day or night, Room, House, Bath or Yard Crashers could strike!! This comment brought to you by HGTV's 2012 Dream Home.

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 1:35 pm

“But then the media crawls all over Santorum"

Like flies on froth.

Slim_Pickins February 23, 2012 at 5:35 pm

More like flies on Santorum.

EatsBabyDingos February 23, 2012 at 1:35 pm

We offended their conservatives. We should throw a bonfire and toss one of our conservatives into the fire for each Afghani that was offended. But who first?

Geminisunmars February 23, 2012 at 2:01 pm

There is an unending list. Unfortunately.

mrpuma2u February 23, 2012 at 2:20 pm

Yeah that's a tough one, but I dutifully submit the name of Rep. Joe Walsh (R) tea bagman, vitriol spouting, deadbeat dad douchbag extra-ordinaire. It's a starting point anyway.

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 3:56 pm

Let's send some Bibles over to Afghanistan and let them make a video of Afghanis burning them.
For the lulz.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:57 pm

Let's send some Bible-^^BASHER^^s over to Afghanistan and let them make a video of Afghanis burning them.
For the lulz.

FIFY, NNTT

GunToting[Redacted] February 23, 2012 at 1:36 pm

I wish I had some snark about this, but I can't. These fucktards were gearing up the impeachment machine starting on November 5, 2008. I swear to Zenu I saw the "IMPEACH OBUMMER!!1!1! bumper stickers before the inauguration. I wonder what they consider to be High Crimes and Misdemeanors?

ChernobylSoup February 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

Oral

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Blah.

Graham Cracker February 23, 2012 at 1:50 pm

Just about anything—if the president happens to be black, and a Democrat, too.

DocChaos February 23, 2012 at 9:50 pm

Presidenting While Black – it's a first class misdemeanor , look it up.

Guppy February 23, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Literacy.

sarah_connor February 23, 2012 at 2:41 pm

Clean. And articulate.

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 4:50 pm

No big deal. Speaker Pelosi said impeachment is off the table. Oh. Wait.

Clancy_Pants February 23, 2012 at 1:36 pm

I wonder what Sarah Palin thinks?

Oh wait here she is.

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Fuck Palin and the snow machine she rode in on.

Clancy_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm

I wouldn't fuck her with Newt's dick.

Negropolis February 24, 2012 at 2:45 am

I wouldn't fuck her with Ann Coulter's dick, or even a 10-point Rasmussen Reports poll.

bureaucrap February 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm

"T"

RedneckMuslin February 23, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Iron Dog!
What does that even mean?

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:11 pm

Man that twitter feed is really down the rabbit hole.

CommieLibunatic February 23, 2012 at 2:24 pm

I'm sorry, but WHO asked her?

40 or 50 % McShineys February 23, 2012 at 4:41 pm

Glen Rice, and Todd.

Oh, asked.

NEVERMIND

Limeylizzie February 23, 2012 at 2:25 pm

But in the midst of all that insanity comes this person.

Beverly Glasser Maiorino Yes..war is hell….How about a solution and peace instead of your usual blather about freedoms. Theocratic twit.
2 minutes ago · Unlike ·

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:50 pm

I like that.

Limeylizzie February 23, 2012 at 3:29 pm

I heartBeverly Glasser Maiorino

elviouslyqueer February 23, 2012 at 3:20 pm

Frosty cunt is frosty.

memzilla February 23, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I think the important thing

memzilla February 23, 2012 at 1:37 pm

I think the important thing is the spirit of tolerance, understanding, and humanity that always infuses the learned debates on this subject.

Nothingisamiss February 23, 2012 at 2:40 pm

Just like Jesus wants.

BarackMyWorld February 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

Is it just me, or is the Freepers' (and pretty much most right-wingers) reaction to EVERY foreign policy issue, large or small, that we should blow everyone up? It's like they're using a two-headed coin of crazy.

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 2:02 pm

They're all too old/fat to serve.

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:11 pm

Heads we nuke them, tails we nuke them but save some for Mecca.

CommieLibunatic February 23, 2012 at 2:27 pm

And what baffles me is that a lot of these… people, if you will… lived through the Cold War. Did they not notice Sword of Damocles dangling above them that whole time? Or did they just not care/buy it?

doloras February 23, 2012 at 7:19 pm

During the Cold War, there was a chance our enemies might nuke us back. Now they don't need to worry about that anymore. It's 1945 again and WE CAN NUKE WHO WE WANT, so why don't we?

sewollef February 24, 2012 at 8:42 am

Sword of Damocles, nah. They were cool about it, since they could: duck and cover…. duck and cover….

Those school desks could survive a 60 kiloton blast and the resulting shock wave, while only 200 yards from ground zero. It's a fact, look it up.

UnholyMoses February 23, 2012 at 2:28 pm

These fucking cowards view war as a video game in which OTHER PEOPLE make the sacrifices, come back with PTSD and missing limbs and horrific images they can never forget, have to decide friend or foe in a split second even though the real enemy doesn't wear a uniform so it's kinda hard to tell the difference …

… all while THOSE NOT LIKE THEM get their houses blown to shit, their marriage parties crashed by a bomb dropped from a drone, their homes invaded and never repaired, and shamed into doing something — hell anything — to reclaim what, ya know, is actually theirs (their nation).

Of course, that last part is, for the right, a feature, not a bug.

ADDING: And, sadly, a disturbing number of Americans agree with this view because, again, they don't have to sacrifice shit. Only military families do.

**sigh**

Bring back the draft and they'd change their tunes right fucking quick.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Currently, less than 10% of the population serves in the military. This means that there IS NO shared sacrifice. The children of the poor are sent off to war by the children of the wealthy. These people have no idea what it is to come home to find that your home has been foreclosed, your wife/husband/partner is divorcing/leaving you, your children no longer recognize you, and your employer couldn't hold your job. They have NO fucking idea about those troops lying in pools of their own piss at Walter Reed, with mold on the ceilings and walls.

The 101st Chairborne. Qualified to speak about war and its ravages just as much as their bosses are qualified to speak about ladyparts and contraception's effects on wimminz.

sewollef February 24, 2012 at 8:52 am

Damn…. your comment fills me with grief and anger.

"Why is it that we fill our kids with hate to fight an old man's war…. and if 'God is Good and God is Great', why can't he change the hearts of men?"

I'd love to claim that, but that Tom Waits chap beat me to it. Sits perfectly with this thread I think…

Mojopo February 23, 2012 at 2:28 pm

…as if we have never bombed anything over there before. What do these people think we are doing in Afghanistan?

"My God man, what a stroke a genius. I'm going to stop peeing on corpses right this second and look into the bomb thing!"

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 4:55 pm

That's what happens when you consider John Bolton an authority on foreign policy matters.

Ruhe February 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

Jesus. Maybe the rest of the world does hate America but if so they'd better get in line cause Americans get to go first.

Arken February 23, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Pff. Typical black guy apologizing to foreign leaders.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 1:41 pm

I think the phrase you are looking for Jim is "War Exceptionalism."

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 1:41 pm

“Actions like this will spell the end of Obama"

Obamactions?

proudgrampa February 23, 2012 at 2:14 pm

Obamanations??

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Those fuckers can't spell.

FlownOver February 23, 2012 at 2:28 pm

"The end of Obama" is "a." Just ask Will Shortz.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Ah, Christianity. What a loving caring religion.

Designer_Rants February 23, 2012 at 2:14 pm

And the intellects of those fellows!

meatlofer February 23, 2012 at 1:41 pm

If you can't burn a Koran, what can you burn?

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 1:47 pm

We're talking about Freepers, right? Well, calories are out.

CommieLibunatic February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

I'll disagree here. I found that being REALLY FUCKIN' PISSED about something made my jogging rounds significantly easier.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:58 pm

Yes, but I b'leev the Cap'n's point is, that's not going to help a *Freeper* burn a single calorie.

Negropolis February 24, 2012 at 2:48 am

If being fuckin' pissed was an exercize regiment, than the freepers should be olympic athletes by now.

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 4:57 pm

Being shouty and ragey doesn't burns calories?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:43 pm

Nary a one, or I'd look like The Hunger Artist.

FlownOver February 23, 2012 at 2:27 pm

The Bridge to Reality, Katie?

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 5:07 pm

For them, that really was a bridge to nowhere.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 1:42 pm

And yet try to allow some nice lady to get the pill through her health insurance, and that is worth trying to start a civil war over.

ChernobylSoup February 23, 2012 at 1:43 pm

Decency is unchristian.

BigDumbRedDog February 23, 2012 at 1:43 pm

"nuke em"? seriously? that's all these re-tards can come up with?

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Yes. It's the simplest solution for them. Like Hot Pockets & Cheetos for dinner.

Designer_Rants February 23, 2012 at 2:18 pm

I've been listening to these re-tards say "nuke 'em,""turn the Middle East into a glass parking lot," and other assorted pig vomit for 20 years. So yes, that must be all they can come up with.

slowhansolo February 23, 2012 at 5:15 pm

Gotta nuke something!

Swampgas_Man February 23, 2012 at 6:07 pm

And then bitch because we can't get their our oil.

Redhead February 23, 2012 at 1:44 pm

"“The best thing we could do is pull out our troops"

But pulling out is a (albeit ineffective) form of birth control, and birth control is evil because it lets teh ladiez have teh sexxxytimes without teh punishment/babiez.

starfanglednut February 23, 2012 at 1:54 pm

When Santorum talks about "Satan", what he really means is "women".

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:59 pm

I'm beginning to think they all do.

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 4:59 pm

Well, it's all Eve's fault.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:15 pm

When Adam delved and Eve span,
Who was then the gentleman?

John Ball can tell us all.

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 1:44 pm

Hate means never having to say you're sorry.

privatejoker77 February 23, 2012 at 1:45 pm

As I read the Free Republic responses I'm reminded that I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 1:51 pm

Take solace from the fact that Freepers clearly don't.

prommie February 23, 2012 at 2:20 pm

"I don't want to live in this world anymore. . . ." TMBG

nonbeliever7 February 23, 2012 at 2:38 pm

I like my favorite songwriter's advice;
"Oh, I used to be disgusted / And now I try to be amused "

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:17 pm
Swampgas_Man February 23, 2012 at 6:08 pm

Home is where you hang your head.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:30 pm

Or, if you were *my* family, where you hang your children.

Canmon February 23, 2012 at 1:45 pm

"We are in the clutches of Satan and Obama is the facilitator"

Sounds like Santorum has his campaign slogan for the general election.

Guppy February 23, 2012 at 2:07 pm

"Facilitator" has too many syllables.

ElPinche February 23, 2012 at 2:20 pm

"Decider" was hard enough for the r33t4rds.

FlownOver February 23, 2012 at 2:26 pm

"N*****r" is just the right length.

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Two syllables & your can really draw out the "ggrrrr" at the end.

Ruhe February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Has anyone noticed if the Christian "film" industry has been churning out more rapture porn since Obama took office? I'd be surprised if they haven't.

JustPixelz February 23, 2012 at 2:41 pm

These people live in the United States of America. And they literally think they're in Hell.

Chet Kincaid February 23, 2012 at 10:26 pm

That is amusing, as if we are attending one of Satan's motivational seminars, and Obama is moderating the panel discussion.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 1:45 pm

"This colored does run!" as opposed to "These colors don't…"?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:39 pm

Hell, isn't that what they're puttin' all those bumperstickers on the FRONT bumper for? It's "Kill the N*****" season again, for Republicans, apparently.

chicken_thief February 23, 2012 at 1:45 pm

Needz moar Marines pissing on dead Afghanies.

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Aren't these fuckwits "pro-life"?

Redhead February 23, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Pro-fetus-life, not pro-brown-person-life.

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 1:59 pm

It almost makes you suspect "pro-life" is just code for "pro-forcing-women-to-stay-barefoot-and-pregnant-in-the-kitchen".

FlownOver February 23, 2012 at 2:24 pm

"Almost," in the sense of "completely." And "makes you suspect" in the sense of "abso-fucking-lutely proves"

Sounding awfully conciliatory today, S-Bot.

CommieLibunatic February 23, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Pro-life until you leave the womb, as they say.

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Ahh, how I've missed that lovely cow's photo. I wonder if she has finally fused to her chair.

JustPixelz February 23, 2012 at 1:47 pm

From BBC, May 2008:

US President George W Bush has made a personal apology over the shooting of a Koran by an American soldier, the White House has confirmed.

Nov 28, 2002:

President Bush apologizes, via the U.S. ambassador in Seuol, for the deaths of two South Korean girls hit by a U.S. military vehicle in June.

And this

President Bush expressed personal regret to Chinese President Hu Jintao for a protest during an elaborate welcoming ceremony on the White House lawn Thursday.

Tundra Grifter February 23, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Not to mention kissing up to that Saudi Prince of a fellow.

Chet Kincaid February 23, 2012 at 10:27 pm

You mean, "kissing on that Saudi Prince of a fellow."

finallyhappy February 23, 2012 at 2:01 pm

Yeah but he was a white GOP prez so we ignore that

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 2:08 pm

Well, the Freepers thought that Bush was a raging Socialist too.

BarackMyWorld February 23, 2012 at 2:15 pm

At least when he became too unpopular for them.

not that Dewey February 23, 2012 at 2:17 pm

"Facts are stupid things"

-Ronald Reagan

yyyaz February 23, 2012 at 5:19 pm

"Reagan was a stupid thing."

-Fact

not that Dewey February 23, 2012 at 7:33 pm

Beautiful.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 1:47 pm

“I wipe my a.ss with pages of the koran,"

I wonder if it's real scratchy. Most paper that you find in books would not be very comfortable to wipe your ass with. Could be the underlying problem for a lot of these folks.

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:02 pm

What I want to know is, how do they have Internet access but not indoor plumbing?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:48 pm

Ted Kaczynski?

40 or 50 % McShineys February 23, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Oh come on, he was just exaggerating for effect!

You know he never wipes his ass. Ever.

SudsMcKenzie February 23, 2012 at 1:47 pm

"The best thing we could do is pull out our troops", lets just leave it at that.

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Here I didn't know that Hamid Karzai, the hand-picked tool of George W. Bush, is "a bunch of radical Islamist [sic]".

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:50 pm

The US-educated, American-oil-company executive who doesn't even know what life is like for poor people, the common people, who comprise most of that poor benighted nation's population.

Say … doesn't that sound suspiciously like Mittens?

Chet Kincaid February 23, 2012 at 10:30 pm

I would like to see Mittens try and pull off Karzai's look!

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 11:16 pm

Sorry, Mittens is just too white to do that.

Blueb4sunrise February 23, 2012 at 1:48 pm

Ahem.

Blueb4sunrise 100p · 2 hours ago
Don't worry, there'll be a santorum of 'Barry Apologized to Musslinmens' in the near future.

Although I gotta admit that it didn't take much insight to predict this.

bureaucrap February 23, 2012 at 2:06 pm

still, kudos for getting there two hours before the rest of us.

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Jim, I hope you washed up after your jaunt to the fever swamp. We don't want to catch anything.

Designer_Rants February 23, 2012 at 2:29 pm

"Unclean!"

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:05 pm
GunToting[Redacted] February 23, 2012 at 1:49 pm

SnoSnookie weighs in on this matter:

Obama apologizes for inadvertent Koran burning; now the US trained & protected Afghan Army can apologize for killing our soldiers yesterday.

#cunt

bagofmice February 23, 2012 at 5:14 pm

You fly hundreds of thousands of troops half-way across the planet, shoot a few things, use robots to blow up a few things, piss on the corpses and desecrate the regional holy book and it makes you wonder, why do they hate america?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Really, WTH is wrong with these sand-n******?

DaRooster February 23, 2012 at 1:49 pm

Shoulda got that one group to pee on the burning Korans…

chicken_thief February 23, 2012 at 1:50 pm

"…and Obama is the facilitator."

I thought Obama was a clueless idiot who never got anything right. Can't they make up their mind?

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:13 pm

Nope.

MissTaken February 23, 2012 at 1:51 pm

If I remember correctly Jesus did say something about 'nuking places back to the stone-age' right before he turned the other cheek.

CapnFatback February 23, 2012 at 1:55 pm

Clearly, Jesus was referring to his ass cheek.

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 2:08 pm

That was General Curtis LeMay who thought he was Jesus.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Actually, the quote you are looking for is:

"Let him without sin cast the first stone, but if you are dealing with brown heathens, let him with sin nuke them back to the stone-age."

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:29 pm

That's the liberal mistranslation. If you go back to the original Aramaic, Jesus is clearly telling Peter, "Turn the other key, on my mark… 3… 2… 1…"

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 23, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Didn't Jesus have to whip out his .45 to get Peter to turn the key in the end?

DaRooster February 23, 2012 at 1:51 pm

"I wipe my a.ss with pages of the koran,will B.O apologize on my behalf.”

You should use one the burning ones…

CrunchyKnee February 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm

That guy is a chucklehead, everyone knows that for a quality wipe, one reaches for the large print King James.

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Soft and Strong with the Love of Christ!

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:15 pm

I doubt that they can even reach their a.ss.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:53 pm

They have these really cool long poles with grippers for that now. You can get them at Mall*Wart.

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

I just thought of the perfect hemorrhoid ad for freepers!

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 1:51 pm

I'm not sure which alternative is worse. Should we close down the internet to rid the world of the haters like those on Free Republic or should we find out who they are and implant RFIDs in their skulls so we will know where to find them?

bagofmice February 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

I want an RFID implant! Imagine the convenience going through the border just by waving your 'plant and having all exculpatory data just pop up. Or going to the emergency room after a car accident and having you medical history found after a quick scan. No more human bureaucracy. No more loss of allergy data, ensuring better recovery rates!

Chip me, tag me, give me a unique name.

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 8:13 pm

I had my cats ‘chipped’. I’ll agree to an RFID if I can get three people to wait on me, keep my food fresh, open the door for me all day long and let me sleep anywhere and anytime.

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 9:33 pm

They'd also cut off your balls / cut out your ovaries, though.

neiltheblaze February 23, 2012 at 1:52 pm

Personally, I'm hoping for a truck-sized meteorite to hit the Republican National Convention during Rick Santorum's acceptance speech. The National average IQ would go up 75 points immediately.

Tundra Grifter February 23, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Is that a photo of Skol Rebel's Mom or girlfriend?

chicken_thief February 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm

Is there a difference in that neck of the woods?

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Both.

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 2:35 pm

I saw what you did there.

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 1:54 pm

At the next debate what will the gang of four say if asked; "What wold you do if you discovered charred remains of the New Testament in the garbage behind a local Mosque?"

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Bomb Iran!

Swampgas_Man February 23, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Bibles are printed on asbestos, everybody knows that.

MadBrahms February 23, 2012 at 6:19 pm

Nah, they're just protected by the holy spirit. If it burns, it's clearly because of translation errors.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:54 pm

You're a Mormon, aren't you?

prommie February 23, 2012 at 1:54 pm

Redneck shitbag pigfucking retards all over Amurrica, and especially in Arizona and South Kakalakee, will now start holding public Koran burnings, organized by the local radio morning zoo-animal fuckers, in order to prove to the world that despite Obama's efforts to display some decency and politeness, we are, in the end, a Nation of Ignorant, Racist, Belligerant Fucktards.

Blueb4sunrise February 23, 2012 at 2:00 pm

….a Nation of Ignorant, Racist, Belligerant Fucktards.
UNDER GOD!!!!

proudgrampa February 23, 2012 at 2:23 pm

"Nation of CHRISTIAN Ignorant, Racist, Belligerant Fucktards"

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Hey Freepers, relax. Obama had his fingers crossed behind his back when he signed that letter of apology, so it doesn't count.

vodkamuppet February 23, 2012 at 1:59 pm

If I wasn't so high from snorting the dust of cremated aborted babies id say that doesn't make any sense. I took some mesculine too.

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 2:24 pm

Do you have any beer or Allman Brothers?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:16 pm

Will you have a little Veuve Clicquot and Diamanda Galas, instead?

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 3:23 pm

On a DG kick, are we?

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:55 pm

Why not? It looks like we might be winning this social issues war against us. Nothing like listening to a little This is The Law of The Plague while contemplating that happy day. (raises glass)

EatsBabyDingos February 23, 2012 at 1:59 pm

Up next, demands for Obama to apologize to BP for the gulf spill.

Steverino247 February 23, 2012 at 2:00 pm

Yes, boys and girls, it is odd that burning a book can cause such an insane reaction, but we knew they were that crazy when we went there and someone should have known better. Some Muslims, like some Christians, are unable to separate the material (a book) from the faith (what people believe) and go berserk when something like this happens. Recall all the nonsense about burning flags years ago. Instead of just charging the protestors with arson or burning without a permit, we have to all put our tits in the wringer and scream. Burning the symbol is not the same as burning, oh, never mind. We're talking about a black guy, so you're not listening…

Goonemeritus February 23, 2012 at 2:00 pm

For a group that is constantly asking for an apology the Conservatives sure do hate hearing an apology.

Baconzgood February 23, 2012 at 2:01 pm

(Unrelated to this post)

C'mon ass face!!!!!!!! JOHN'S ON VACATION!!!!!!!! no matter how many times I call or pretend to e-mail him on Wonkette he's not going to fucking answer! You wanna know why? HE WON'T ANSWER HIS PHONE BECAUSE HIS CELL IS IN THE 2ND TO BOTTOM DRAWER ON THE LEFT OF MY FUCKING DESK!!!!!!!!!!!! As for e-mail, he has a reason that his response is "I'm won't be able to respond to any e-mails 3-1-12 please contact J***********Y-AKA Baconzgood if you need assistance with anything" HE'S ON VACATION DICK NOSE!!!!!!!!

Now I'm pretending that I give a fuck about John's client and tapping the key board with an intense look on my face so he will think I'm trying to get a hold of John on his 2nd honeymoon……

(this comment is 100% snark free)

prommie February 23, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Don't forget to ask them if they want fries, or a hot apple pie, with that.

freakishlywrong February 23, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Feel better?

DaRooster February 23, 2012 at 2:29 pm

At least we understand… I swear people are getting more stupid every fucking day! And the driving… "What do I do at a 4 way stop again? Oh, I'm on the right and I was here first… I guess I should wait until someone else goes… OK… now I'll go."

Fuck!

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:07 pm

What the fuck is this lever on the left side of the steering column for?

Nothingisamiss February 23, 2012 at 2:50 pm

FUCKWITS!

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 3:34 pm

Baco guy, you got to get to be the IT droid in that op. Then you keep them in the dark about how much you need to do to keep things running. In that capacity, even when the president goes by, it's easy to look like; "Our bandwith is crashing, If I don't pull it up the whole freberslock will go down."

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 2:02 pm

Gah, these vile bigoted fucktards really do want to start a religious war, a new Crusades against the brown Muslims. Fuck them. Maybe we should drop 2000 lb cement bricks on Branson, Missouri and Nashville, Tennessee.

MissTaken February 23, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Rapture, it's what's for dinner.

SorosBot February 23, 2012 at 2:16 pm

Oh it would be so nice if they all just vanished, leaving the rest of us in peace.

Nostrildamus February 23, 2012 at 2:04 pm

I see a reptilian in back of Obama's head!!!

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:26 pm

That was just John McAncient, trying to grab the O-man's butt.

donner_froh February 23, 2012 at 2:04 pm

Actions like this will spell the end of Obama if word gets out through all the Lame Stream Media

Since this story is only being covered by the New York Fucking Times no one will ever know about it.

johnnyzhivago February 23, 2012 at 2:05 pm

Mitt Romney would fly his dog straight to Mecca and tie it to the top of the Kabala rock and let it poop all over it.

Then these Mooslims would start showing Amurica some respect.

DemmeFatale February 23, 2012 at 2:05 pm

I guess the wingtards are not interested in protecting US soldiers.
I'll bet this simple apology saves lives.

(BTW: Keep those "oldie but goodie " photos coming, Wonkette!)

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:27 pm

Disirregardless, civilized people usually apologize when they have done something wrong. I understand this has even been true of Americans. Also, too.

owhatever February 23, 2012 at 2:06 pm

The wingnuts have a thing about burning books, because it is easier and more wackadoodle fun than reading them.

johnnyzhivago February 23, 2012 at 2:10 pm

Next thing you know this Obama is going to give away the Panama Canal.

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:22 pm

Nuke it!

prommie February 23, 2012 at 2:11 pm

The fucktards always, always turn to their secret fascination, sodomy, in times like this. Someone tell me, there has to be a post, there must be multiple posts, threatening or fantasizing about shoving Korans, and boots, and gun barrels, up various people's anuses, are there?

MoeDeLawn February 23, 2012 at 3:18 pm

careful – they could retaliate with tales of buttsechs in the comments they read on this …

wait. I said "read." Never mind.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 6:40 pm

The difference is, buttsechs here on teh Wonketz is voluntary and enjoyed. The sodomy they speak of is always forceful and involves an unwilling recipient.

It's just like their attitudes towards sex/rape.

RedneckMuslin February 23, 2012 at 2:12 pm

“But then the media crawls all over Santorum for telling the truth: we are in the clutches of Satan and Obama is the facilitator…”

There is a person alive that thinks this.

proudgrampa February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

More than one, my friend.

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:57 pm

Whole friggin' churches full of 'em.

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:14 pm

ie. Free Republic readers

mavenmaven February 23, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Those Free Republic folks are just waiting to unleash their new weapon against Islam: Santorum!

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:17 pm

President Santorum will don his chain mail and armor, climb aboard his war stallion, and lead the forces of Xtianity in a Holy Crusade to rescue Jerusalem from the Infidels, with the blessings of The Pope.

mavenmaven February 23, 2012 at 5:35 pm

I just thought they'd fling some Santorum at them :)

teebob2000 February 23, 2012 at 2:17 pm

Let's all wipe our asses with the fucking Book of Moron and see how much Mittens enjoys desecrating HIS beloved book.

Better yet, let's first shit ourselves wearing magic fucking Mormon underwear, too.

yyyaz February 23, 2012 at 5:44 pm

Careful with that line of thinking, next thing you know you'll be a GOP senator.

ElPinche February 23, 2012 at 2:18 pm

BTW, that koolaid lady is dead already.

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Victim of Death Panel, no doubt.

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Aye…but is she dead enough?

WiscDad February 23, 2012 at 2:18 pm

…and Jesus said…"nuke not, lest you be nuked"

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 2:21 pm

What's next? An Obama apology to the Egyptians for The Burning Bush?

Tundra Grifter February 23, 2012 at 2:28 pm

JMC:

I once had to apologize to an old girl friend for that.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:29 pm

"I am Pierre ze Fighter Pilot, and when I go down, I go down in FLAMES!"

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 2:39 pm

I just had a horrible thought…what if that was George's nickname for Laura's hoohaa?

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 2:56 pm

That’s how we ended up in this mess. Dubya wanted to punish the Marines and sent to Iraq because every time he was near them they would yell “Hoo Rah” and he thought they were talking about Laura.

MozakiBlocks February 23, 2012 at 3:03 pm

And that incident with the Red Sea.

James Michael Curley February 23, 2012 at 3:38 pm

I forgot about the Red Sea. Before Obama became president it wasn't the socialist commie Sea it is now.

BlueStateLibel February 23, 2012 at 2:23 pm

Time for my semi-annual dragging out of this photo of Dubya tip-toeing through the tulips with the Saudi king: http://bit.ly/zqYbpc It never grows old.

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:57 pm

Awww

BaldarTFlagass February 23, 2012 at 3:05 pm

Tulips are Dutch. European, as it were. Them are Texas Bluebonnets through which the Saudi royal and his rentboy are tiptoeing. Texan through and through, to the point that they are our state flower. I'm not much of a Texas chauvinist, but they are lovely.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:31 pm

Aren't they a kind of lupine? Very pretty en masse, as they must be during wildflower season, eh?

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:19 pm

Sounds like a job for Dennis Moore!

yyyaz February 23, 2012 at 5:48 pm

Found everywhere in the western U.S. of America. Leave it to the bloatfish Repubelick of Tex-ass to be so insular and provincial to appropriate it as their own and then demand everyone else call it Texass bluebonnet.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:55 pm

Really? I thought it was native to the Southwest, TX in particular, and then spread outward from there. But I really don't know for sure. I seem to remember something about Lady Bird Johnson being a great proponent of native flora, and starting some kind of program to raise the profile of native plants and flowers.

All I know is, lupines don't seem to do well in my overly cool soil. I've tried them about a dozen times, and so far, I've succeeded in getting two little sprouts, both of which died young. And I did everything short of peeling the seed coat off with my teeth.

MadBrahms February 23, 2012 at 6:25 pm

You just need to make a flash / youtube version with swooning classical music (or maybe something from Kismet?) in the background, and it will be perfect.

BlueStateLibel February 23, 2012 at 7:04 pm

Ummm, good idea… I'm thinking "Wild Horses" by the Rolling Stones or "Angie." It will be beautiful (and I'll add the kissy ones).

Troglodeity February 23, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Now, Ronald Reagan: THERE was a manly-man President who never apologized to any foreign country about anything!

Oh wait … never mind: http://ceinquiry.us/2011-02-05-reagan-apology

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:20 pm

And he showed those filthy Muslims when he pulled the Marines out of Beirut after they suicide bombed their barracks.

Tundra Grifter February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Wow! I thought I was cold – you guys make me feel much better.

Those are some solid shots right there!

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 2:33 pm

Gotta keep the family line pure ya know. . .

Blueb4sunrise February 23, 2012 at 2:30 pm

Somewhat On….from Atrios……..
Iraq stopped buying rice from U.S. [market forces?]
USian rice farmer says

"You would think with all that we've done over there, there would be a way to get them to do business with us,"
<a href="http://www.philly.com/philly/business/20120223_ap…” target=”_blank”>http://www.philly.com/philly/business/20120223_ap

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 2:44 pm

These dumbasses have it in their heads that we did a good thing in Iraq. I wish they would go there and allow Iraqis to express their gratitude in person.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:31 pm

Wow. These people are … uh … FUCK ME!!

banana_bread February 23, 2012 at 2:31 pm

Aw, come on! Finding crazy in a Freeper thread is like bowling with the bumpers on. There's no challenge!

Dashboard Buddha February 23, 2012 at 2:37 pm

I see your point, but you've never seen me bowl.

proudgrampa February 23, 2012 at 2:41 pm

You know, I am all for sensitivity to other people's beliefs. But I gotta admit, I don't really give a rat's ass whether Muslims get all strung out about troops destroying a Koran.

On the other hand, I really don't give a damn about the wingtards who think Obama is wrong to apologize.

So I guess I'm neutral on this one…

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 5:29 pm

Well, its that old "Winning the hearts and minds" thing. When you state that you are engaged in a war against terrorism and not a war against a specific religion, it kind of looks bad when you destroy their symbols of that religion.

jus_wonderin February 23, 2012 at 2:44 pm

So, that's a female with the Koolaid package??????????

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 3:33 pm

Well. Sort of.

Wonderthing February 23, 2012 at 2:50 pm

Those bastards better not burn a copy of the Constitution. That's OUR job!

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 2:52 pm

Gah!

Fox n Fiends February 23, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Where was the wingnut outrage when Saint Ronald Reagan apologized to the Japanese for WW2? http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/

Loaded_Pants February 23, 2012 at 3:00 pm

"A 2000 lb cement brick should be dropped on the Kabala rock right now. With a warning that the next 2000 lb. item dropped on that spot will be live."
Was the poster referring to themselves?

MozakiBlocks February 23, 2012 at 3:05 pm

I'd like to apologize for Free Republic but that would mean assuming responsibility for them and I ain't doing that.

elburritodeluxe February 23, 2012 at 3:12 pm

She's clearly drinking Kool Ade, but not the Obama kind!

GOPCrusher February 23, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Actually, I can't believe Freepers have time to post comments on the web site, what with being out on S&D missions all day in the mountains of Afghanistan.
After humping all day, I'd just want to sleep.

jus_wonderin February 23, 2012 at 4:16 pm

Okay, now we've gone to far. I won't be able to sleep tonight. But, you have a point or two.

widestanceromance February 23, 2012 at 4:27 pm

No, THIS is too far:

Curtains parting in the night,
let me in your sweet delight

[I'm pretty sure she's who Robyn Hitchcock was thinking about.]

headphase February 23, 2012 at 5:07 pm

"With a warning that the next 2000 lb. item dropped on that spot will be live."
Rush?

MadBrahms February 23, 2012 at 6:26 pm

Chris Christie?

chascates February 23, 2012 at 9:01 pm

Via TPM:

Newt Calls Obama's Apology To Karzai An 'Outrage'

The Gingrich campaign released the following statement regarding President Obama's reported apology sent to Afghan President Karzai, over the burning of the Quran by NATO troops:

It is an outrage that President Obama is the one apologizing to Afghan President Karzai on the same day two American troops were murdered and four others injured by an Afghan soldier. It is Hamid Karzai who owes the American people an apology, not the other way around.

Gingrich added:

This destructive double standard whereby the United States and its democratic allies refuse to hold accountable leaders who tolerate systematic violence and oppression in their borders must come to an end.

But if some one burns a Bible or the American flag . . .

Chet Kincaid February 23, 2012 at 10:14 pm

Obama sang "Sympathy For The Devil" with Mick Jagger at the White House!! Pass it on!1!1!1!!!

ttommyunger February 24, 2012 at 12:01 am

So, I gather from the pix that Newt does not like Kool-Aid.

DahBoner February 24, 2012 at 10:55 am

“A Kenyan, a Muslim and a socialist walk into a bar. And then he makes everyone get an abortion.”

Generation[redacted] February 23, 2012 at 1:58 pm

For true effect, we would need a much more powerful Afghan army stationed in Alabama, acting with impunity and with full air support. Then they could burn a bunch of bibles and see if the locals react peaceably or with their 2nd Amendment Remedies.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 2:51 pm

But no religous Muslim would *ever* do that, because they consider the bible sacred.

glamourdammerung February 23, 2012 at 5:13 pm

These same people would be all in a lather if the Afghan army burnt a bunch of bibles.

Well of course they would be. That would be different.

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 5:45 pm

Me too. (Hugs you back, blows on your belly)

HEY! Not THAT part.

yyyaz February 23, 2012 at 7:35 pm

Lupine is actually even more widespread than I thought. It is blooming profusely right now out in my stretch of the desert. And it is lovely, but poisonous. So, please, do not crack its seeds with your teeth.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lupinus

FROTHY February 23, 2012 at 7:51 pm

Why, yyyaz! I had no idea you cared!

I'm not planning to try it ever again. The seeds just seem to rot or the plants die. Everything else does SO well, it just seems a shame to keep trying to force these poor little guys, they *clearly* don't like my weather. Echinacea doesn't do so well either. Spindly, with tiny stunted little flowers and a <40% germination rate.

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