Important Website Now Lets You Turn Dead Mormons Into Gay Dead Mormons

It was very exciting to learn that the young Mitt Romney maybe baptized the sad ghosts of Jewish victims of the Nazi Holocaust, to turn them into followers of Mitt's folk religion. Who knew Mitt ever did anything but the kind of vicious 1% capitalism that ruins the lives of countless Americans?

Well now, thanks to the Internet (again!), there is a new "web app" that lets you easily turn all Dead Mormons into homosexuals. Dead Mormon homosexuals, we assume, unless there's some fine print/privacy policy thing on the bottom of the web page that explains in dense legal terminology how the Dead Mormon Homosexuals will then Rise Up From Their Graves and commit deep crimes against the Living ... oh god, that's how Romney's going to become president, isn't it? OH GOD. [ Gay Mormon Zapper Website ]