HEARTS AND MINDS  2:15 pm February 21, 2012

America Now Burning Korans In Garbage Piles, In Afghanistan

by Wonkette Jr.

Make this man president, if he isn't already!You have probably deduced, after sort of paying attention to the “War On Terror” for more than a decades, that the “War in Afghanistan” has no purpose whatsoever. This would be incorrect. The purpose of the wars against Afghanistan and Iraq and Libya and Pakistan and Yemen and whatever Islamic countries we forgot to mention is to create Islamic terrorists. It’s hard work! You need to piss on a lot of dead Afghan soldiers and bomb a lot of kids at wedding parties and, of course, burn great piles of Qurans, in the garbage, if you’re going to get four or five dudes riled up enough to try to blow up a mailbox outside an embassy or something.

From today’s Bullshit Gazette:

The White House is apologizing for the burning of Muslim holy books in a pile of garbage at a U.S. military base in Afghanistan. Press secretary Jay Carney says it’s a “deeply unfortunate incident” and doesn’t reflect the respect the U.S. military has for the religious practices of the Afghan people.

According to the same brief dispatch, the Qurans in question were removed from a gigantic army base’s prison library — America operates vast prisons in Afghanistan, forever — because the holy books contained “extremist messages.” [Washington Post]


Hola wonkerados.

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nounverb911 February 21, 2012 at 2:19 pm

Fox Noise rant about Obama apologizing in 3…Oops too late!

JustPixelz February 21, 2012 at 2:57 pm

I hear that "Obama apologizing for America" meme. So I googled it … and can't find those nefarious apologies. I found a few "we regret" statements, reminiscent of Bush expressing "sincere regret over your missing pilot and aircraft" to China.

Or "Bush on several occasions apologized to foreign governments for actions taken by U.S. soldiers, such as for the shooting of a Koran".

BarackMyWorld February 21, 2012 at 2:23 pm

You know who else…? Forget it. Too easy.

nounverb911 February 21, 2012 at 2:26 pm

Ray Bradbury?

ShaveTheWhales February 21, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Fuck me.

Swampgas_Man February 21, 2012 at 5:58 pm

Farenheit 911!

MadBrahms February 21, 2012 at 10:27 pm

Tipper Gore, in her dreams?

MissTaken February 21, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Silly! Everyone knows you don't burn the Koran in the garbage. Instead you open it up and funnel vodka into your homoerotic buddies ass for sippy time.

mavenmaven February 21, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Burning Books For Freedoms!

SorosBot February 21, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Well the Bible doesn't contain any extremist messages, like not just encouraging but commanding genocide, endorsing slavery, ordering the death penalty for adultery and disobedient kids, etc.

Loaded_Pants February 21, 2012 at 3:20 pm

But that's what the Real God wants!

iburl February 21, 2012 at 6:42 pm

And don't forget, no Bacon! I mean WTF!?!

James Michael Curley February 21, 2012 at 2:37 pm

"Imprisonment alone is not enough to create a custodial situation within the meaning of Miranda," Justice Samuel Alito wrote in the court's majority opinion.

Do they read these things before they publish them?

Now Scalia gets it; "Imprisonment, leg irons, and a wash tub full of wet cement alone are not enough to create a custodial situation within the meaning of Miranda,"

prommie February 21, 2012 at 2:53 pm

Scalia is losing it. Back in the day he would come up with some superficially appealing bit of sophistry, but I guess he doesn't even think he owes us that courtesy, anymore. Arrogance; "you're going to eat my shit and like it."

NeonTrotsky February 21, 2012 at 3:22 pm

And who voted with the wingnuts? That's right…Kagan!

MadBrahms February 21, 2012 at 10:28 pm

Recent Supreme Court decisions are the very definition of texts containing "extremist messages"

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 21, 2012 at 2:38 pm

Bill O'Reilly launches into a half-hour rant questioning why there was not similar media coverage and protests when his book was burned by soldiers, http://wonkette.com/454979/soldiers-in-afghanista… , in 3, 2, 1……

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 21, 2012 at 2:39 pm

It should be noted that they only burned the Korans after they had finished off all the Book of Mormons that they had.

nounverb911 February 21, 2012 at 2:42 pm

There's a Marriott in Kabul?

johnnymeatworth February 21, 2012 at 2:40 pm

It's Fahrenheit 451-derful!

slowhansolo February 21, 2012 at 2:47 pm

Here's your problem: Someone set this thing to "evil."


prommie February 21, 2012 at 2:51 pm

That doesn't seem like such a smart thing to do. Maybe this is some new kind of "smart." "Army Smart." (Because "military intelligence" has too many syllables.)

edgydrifter February 21, 2012 at 2:55 pm

The wingnut's conundrum: whether to condemn the president because holy books were desecrated under his watch, or to condemn the president because he hasn't publicly defended burning the Koran.

BTWBFDIMHO February 21, 2012 at 3:17 pm

We'd have to work with our North Koran allies to find peace in that region.

DaRooster February 21, 2012 at 3:34 pm

"FREEDOM OF RELIGION!!! Unless you are brownish."

Local_Mojo February 21, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Afghanistan? Is that the "Weapons of Mass Destruction War" or the other one?

Callyson February 21, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Press secretary Jay Carney says it’s a “deeply unfortunate incident” and doesn’t reflect the respect the U.S. military has for the religious practices of the Afghan people.
No, it just reflects the contempt that (some people in) the military have for everyone who is not white and Christian.
How long before FOX tries to frame this as a denial of the soldiers' religious liberty?

Steverino247 February 21, 2012 at 3:59 pm

Somebody tossed the books into a bin, the bin got tossed into a pile, some sergeant yelled at some privates to haul the pile someplace else and burn it (like we do with everything else over there) and some local guys on clean up detail recognized the printing. This is what we get for hiring literate locals, I guess.

Overall, it was felony stupid and someone's career is over. Probably several careers, actually.

ttommyunger February 22, 2012 at 8:46 pm


SayItWithWookies February 21, 2012 at 4:00 pm

What the hell — nobody had the thought to toss a few bibles in there just to make it look more egalitarian? This should be an ongoing policy anytime someone starts a fire — just throw a KJV into the conflagration in case there's a Qur'an burning by mistake, and everyone'll be happy.

bagofmice February 21, 2012 at 6:31 pm

Bloody anti-papist.

chascates February 21, 2012 at 4:49 pm

Where they burn books they burn people too.

Wait, what?

Numbat_Dundee February 22, 2012 at 7:15 am

They did that in Fallujah, with phosphorus.

littlebigdaddy February 21, 2012 at 4:53 pm

Here's a tip for the US Army: if the bookburning doesn't work, try breaking a lot of windows.

MinAgain February 21, 2012 at 5:14 pm

This is why we can't have nice things.

MadBrahms February 21, 2012 at 10:31 pm

Few bad apples, etc, etc, librarian will be pressed to death in the moving stacks, nothing to see here.

DahBoner February 22, 2012 at 7:49 am

We need to get some Catholic Priests over there STAT.

They need something better to do than whine about contraceptives, which they never use, because they are married to Jesus, etc…

HELisforHEL February 22, 2012 at 11:44 am

Siiigh. That's all I've got.

ttommyunger February 22, 2012 at 8:49 pm

Four dead so far (Wed.)in rioting over this SNAFU. Afghanistan, he fuck-up that just keeps on giving.

Redrighthand February 23, 2012 at 10:26 am

Meh, I'll send up a whole stack of fuckin korans and light it with a burning bible. All the "holy books" are good for is kindling fires and hate anyways…

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