awful people being awful

America’s #1 Professional Bigot Pat Buchanan Officially Out At MSNBC

Okaybye!Crusted-over boil Pat Buchanan will no longer be fomenting all-out race war at MSNBC, he is sad to announce. In his latest syndicated column (HOW MANY MEDIA DID THIS PIECE OF OFFAL NEED?) which is, of course, hilariously titled “The New Blacklist,” Buchanan revealed he is finally leaving the network after ten productive and bigotry-filled years. Let’s celebrate Pat’s legacy of barely concealed racial animus after the jump!

Well, we are not linking to Buchanan’s prickly “Goodbye, Cruel Multiracial World” announcement, where he predictably rails against the liberals and the gays and the blacks and the black liberal gay atheist blacklisters who, of late, have made being an awful racist-slash-homophobe so unpleasant for him. Let’s just quickly highlight the wisdom of Hero Commenter “derek,” and his response to Buchanan:

i don’t think anyone is restricting your speech or editing what you say.

i think we live in free markets. and the free market decided your thoughts and disapproval of the lives of hard-working gay Americans is not profitable.

Hooray for free-markets!

Hooray indeed, “derek”! And now here is Pat Buchanan being hit in the face with a pie.

[Pat Buchanan on the Internet]

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  • GunToting[Redacted]

    It's so sad that an old, rich, white guy just can't catch a break.

    • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

      As an old white guy, who aspires to wealth, I concur. After all, if it wasn't for them dumb Irishmen, we Finns would be world renown drunks and I could get work ranting at Occupy Washington protestors.

      • Terry

        The other thing holding back Finns is the fact that the word (with one N) also means the appendage of a fish. That makes the rest of us snicker involuntarily.

    • An_Outhouse

      Ageism!!!1!!

    • Callyson

      And I am proud that I was able to give you upfist 69.

  • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

    karma dictates his spot is filled by a cheaper, hard-working Mexican alternative.

    • deelzebub

      I nominate the nice young gay Latino nurse who rescued Gabby Giffords.

    • Jerri

      Lou Dobbs?

    • An_Outhouse

      preferrably one young enough to also pick up the janitorial duties, too.

    • http://whatisawatthedevolution.blogspot.com imissopus

      El Spielbergo?

      • http://gratuity.wordpress.com/ Gratuitous World

        true. i always thought of Buchanan as the football to America's groin.

    • Callyson

      Tom Tancredo?

    • horsedreamer_1

      Antonio Villarraigosa?

      (After his infidelity & messy divorce torpedoed his political future beyond LA mayoralty, I could see "Tony Villar" being the Chicano Harold Ford.)

  • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

    Pat: you ride out on a rail with the bigotry you have; not with the bigotry you wish we had.

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ slowhansolo

    The world's a hard place when you're a noxious asshole.

    • FNMA

      I don't know about that. A lot of noxious assholes make pretty good livings on the TV. If it weren't for noxious assholes, Fox News would be reduced to broadcasting Bedtime for Bonzo repeatedly.

    • sewollef

      "The world's a hard place when you're a noxious asshole."

      Not hard enough by half for bigots….

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Noxious asshole … and role model for Kevin Kookogey, et al.

  • Texan_Bulldog

    Pat Buchanan=bigoted curmudgeon.

    So sad that [the majority of] the country refuses to live in the 1950s, dammit!

    • FNMA

      Don't you mean 1850s?

      • Fare la Volpe

        50s A.D.

        • sewollef

          Ah, right… back when there were slaves, yes?

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Curmudgeon is too nice a word for that guy. Andy Rooney was a curmudgeon. Bigot is OK, though.

    • Isyaignert

      Make that the 1850s.

  • ThundercatHo

    That's not really salad dressing. Mr. T's red-headed stepchild has been saving up for awhile.

  • Tundra Grifter

    It's just before 7:00 am here on the Left Coast.

    I predict Buchanan will be on Sheer uh "Am i uh An Idiot?" uh InSannity's radio show today, playing the victim and listening to InSannity whine about how "Journalism died in 2008" and how unfair it all is.

    Twenty bucks says inSannity works in Mr. Obama and the mainstream media's lack of vetting.

    • freakishlywrong

      Make in $10,000 and you're on.

      • Tundra Grifter

        I'll go $400,000 – after all, that's not much.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Anyone who uses the words "journalism" and "Pat Buchanan" together in a sentence deserves to be screamed at by Coulter and Breitfart non-stop for 24 hours.

  • CapnFatback

    Buchanan's going to be really pissed when he discovers that he's being replaced by a spotted owl.

    • Dashboard Buddha

      Trained by our own User of Owls?

      • not that Dewey

        One can only hope.

        • CapnFatback

          je je je indeed.

          • user-of-owls

            Not only that, but my agent is going to demand a bowl of live stoats in the Green Room before every appearance. And only Red Stoats, not those nasty brown or yellow ones.

          • http://zvibleindmeis.tumblr.com/ Spurning Beer

            Hey Buchanan, eat a bag of lightly salted brown or yellow stoats!

    • Terry

      Hopefully, a gay spotted owl.

    • chicken_thief

      Who?

      *too easy?*

  • SorosBot

    Hey now, you're being unfair in calling Pat "an awful racist-slash-homophobe"; you forget that he's a hardcore anti-Semite, misogynist and Nazi apologist too.

    • Tundra Grifter

      SB:

      Who else thought World War II was a big mistake?

      • Fare la Volpe

        Ron Paul?

      • SorosBot

        Joseph Stalin?

      • Crank_Tango

        Joe Kennedy Sr?

      • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

        Mussolini, when they were hanging him from a lightpost.
        Emperor Hirohito, when he saw the mushroom cloud
        Hitler, as the bullet passed through his brain.
        Pat Buchanan, always.

      • MissTaken

        Prescott Bush?

      • MosesInvests

        John Foster Dulles?

      • GOPCrusher

        Charles Lindbergh?

      • Callyson

        Bob Dole?

    • prommie

      Apologist?

  • grace_nearing

    Too bad Fox News is apparently "toning it down" 'cuz Crazy Uncle Pat would ooze right in.

    • Terry

      He's best suited to a radio show on either AM or shortwave.

    • An_Outhouse

      The only reason I can think is that he charges too much for Faux. I'm sure we'll still be blessed with his presence on the McLaughlin group on PBS.

      • GOPCrusher

        Oh yippie! I still have a reason to get out of bed on Sunday mornings.

  • freakishlywrong

    Good. Doucheborough next please.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      Won't happen. He fills the right wing douche quota so everybody else can "lean forward".

  • Not_So_Much

    How long til he finds a new home on Fox as a multi-cultural specialist?

    • An_Outhouse

      No. He'll be the residient historian.

  • Indiepalin

    Pat and Bay (of Pigs) Buchanan can do what they do best now: lick out the urinals at this summer's convention in Tampa.

  • FakaktaSouth

    Speaking of gay, black, liberals, they shoulda let Jonathan Capehart (my unwitting gay boyfriend and personal stylist) ambush-fire his Blarney Stone ass on the live tv, give a fabulous speech about the horror that is Pat's "legacy", then kick his dumb ass out the studio. This is probably why they don't let me have my own studio. But I think it sounds killer.

    • SorosBot

      That would be awesome; you should have your own studio for that.

    • Limeylizzie

      You and I both , with the love for Capehart , I am especially fond of his constantly changing pocket handkerchiefs.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      FakaktaSouth, you are a national treasure. I would pay to add your studio to my Xfinity package.

  • RedneckMuslin

    There's a lot of slime that will fill this vacuum.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Allen West, that you?

  • Lucidamente1

    First they came for Father Coughlin, and I didn't speak out . . .

    • GunToting[Redacted]

      …because I was too busy organizing the celebratory festival?

      • poncho_pilot

        it was also a surprise party. mum's the word.

    • Nostrildamus

      His altarboys?

  • freakishlywrong

    It's only too bad the nation wasn't treated to his views on contraception.

  • Generation[redacted]

    What did he do, suggest that we all deserve equality?

  • Grief_Lessons

    This is television, folks. They're just making space for a younger race-baiting homophobe, one with marvellous cheek bones and a huge rack.

    • poncho_pilot

      Rush?

      • freakishlywrong

        "rack" not "hack".

        • poncho_pilot

          i dunno. he's probably at least a C cup but i suppose that's not huge per se. as for his hackitude, i think he's like the Hendrix or Jesus of hacks. no one can really top him. they can just imitate.

    • elviouslyqueer

      Substitute "prominent Adam's apple" for "huge rack" and hey presto! Ann Coulter at your service.

      • chicken_thief

        Nah. They'll prolly go with a chick.

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      marvellous cheek bones and a huge rack.

      You mean huge cock, don't you? The wimminz should be too busy holding an aspirin between their knees.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Don't tell me. You're Marcus Bachmann's agent.

    • randoracer

      I'm OK with that. I mean, if I have to listen to virulent, hate-filled gay bashing, overt racism, unseemly anti-Semitism and general conservative blather, I might as well be able to rub one out whilst watching.

  • chicken_thief

    Why fuck did they even hire the douche? It ain't like he's done some 180 over the past couple of years.

    • Tundra Grifter

      In real life, what has he actually done? Same for Boss "I wasn't wrong, I was misinformed" BlunderRush. And, in reality, Ole Newt.

      They are the Paris Hiltons of politics.

    • SayItWithWookies

      He'd been on his way out for a while — but then he picked up loads of cred by garnering so many votes from old Jewish Floridians in the 2000 election. Anyway, the McLaughlin Group should be interesting tonight — he's still on that for now.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        Jesus fuck, is that still on?! Their shit was already stale in 1984.

  • lefty74

    Years from now Gingrich will be the fired MSNBC bigot.

    • jus_wonderin

      I can't decide if I want to live in that version of the future…or not.

    • GOPCrusher

      Has Newt ever been on MSNBC? I thought Press The Meat was as far into the Lamestream Media that the ever went.

  • freakishlywrong

    Anyone else prefer pies, (preferred delivery system: mohawked dude), to glitter bombing?

    • Swampgas_Man

      GlitterPie! W/ fresh-squeezed Santorum!

  • DaSandman

    And another one bites the dust, hey hey!

  • elviouslyqueer

    Oh please, salad dressing? Wake me when Pat gets flagrantly assaulted by glitter.

    • jus_wonderin

      Call me an old, but tar and lightly sprinkled feathers works for me. Yes, they can, indeed, be pink feathers.

    • Fare la Volpe

      Why do people keep throwing those when they're so ineffective?

      As any stripper can tell you, glitter comes off.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        I'm not in favor of assaulting politicians. Inevitably, a wingnut is going to throw something "harmless" at a Democrat, and we'll be pissed, but with no high ground if glitter and pies are cool.

        • GOPCrusher

          "Harmless" like a Molotov Cocktail?

          • 40 or 50 % McShineys

            "It's essentially free gasoline."

            –Megyn Kelly

  • comrad_darkness

    Buchanan is at least crazy in his own special entertaining way. The rest are all crazy like they were stamped at some black helicopter, Alaskan special victim's unit cookie cutter factory.

    • poncho_pilot

      he was into being a bigot before it was cool. it used to be underground.

      • Texan_Bulldog

        Exactly. Kind of like when you have to go out in public with your grandpa; although times have changed, crazy racist grandpa hasn't caught on that it's not okay to use the N word anymore (at least in public).

        • poncho_pilot

          and you have to be like, "no my grandpa was talking about his old school pants."
          awkward! no one ever buys that line.

          • An_Outhouse

            I always claim we are on our way to buy nuts. You know, those ones call 'Nigger Toes'.

          • poncho_pilot

            not sure if this is funny, sad, or both because that's what both of my grands called them…i was at least sixteen before i knew what a Brazil nut was.

        • jus_wonderin

          I actually have a sign at my door. Don't enter if you are an individual that uses the N word. Keeps my good ole boy brother at his house.

          • doloras

            Well, at least the sign doesn't say "Dead N-Word Storage".

    • Terry

      Oddly enough, when he was on McLaughlin he seemed like a voice of reason compared to the host.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        Yes, Pat had a way of sounding reasonable and intelligent when responding to a topic on that show. It was actually rather surprising to hear all his bigotry and backwards Catholic Conservatism spew out in other contexts, especially when he ran for President. But even in the '80s on McLaughlin, he and Novak were clearly part of the He-Man Israeli Haters Club. When otherwise right-wingnuts go off on an anti-Israel trip, it's usually about anti-semitism, as he has amply demonstrated since then.

      • GOPCrusher

        Or Monica Crowley.

  • SorosBot

    ♪ ♫ Hit the road, Pat, and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more; hit the road, Pat, and don't you come back no more. ♬ ♭

    • jus_wonderin

      I'm leavin', on a midnight train to Georgia………………….

      • Geminisunmars

        Nah nah nah nah…nah nah nah nah…hey hey hey…goodbye…..

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      I would love to see Tamron Hall and the Tamronettes singing this, with hip and finger-wagging choreography, as he is booed out of the studio!

  • http://www.wonkette.com ManchuCandidate

    What will Pat (and his female alter ego "Bay") do now?

    • Texan_Bulldog

      It is strange that they've never been seen in the same room at the same time. (I figured she was the gey & Pat didn't want anything to do with her.)

    • http://www.toastcat.com Fred_Wertham_Jr

      Pat won't have to put on that dress anymore when he goes on CNN.

    • prommie

      Bay will return to her full-time job, using her face as a tunnel-borer for highway and railway tunnels.

  • KeepFnThatChicken

    …and Reverend Al?

    …and Ed?

    I mean, seriously. Give the Democracy Now! lady a Vitamin B12 shot and let her do THEIR programs.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      It was fashionable to hate on Ed because he was superficially supposed to be just a left wing version of the idiots on the right, but his show is actually very good, and definitely an upgrade from Lawrence O'Donnell in the timeslot (and Keith, too).

    • GOPCrusher

      I got banned from Ed's website forum for repeately calling a Tea Bagger a racist scumbag.
      Seems that they wanted to have a forum where people of all ideals could come and debate the issues.
      You can always expect a well-reasoned argument from someone who has the President of The United States portrayed as the Kool-Aid Man as their avatar.

      • bagofmice

        Oh Yeah!

        Wait, I might be missing some racial and class based context, because as a kid in the trailer park… Kool-Aid was awesome sugar-power for our hijinks in the woods.

  • poncho_pilot

    he's actually being replaced with a refurbished t-shirt gun: the Pat Bu-Cannon™. whenever they want Pat's take on an issue they'll turn to the cannon and it will fire Nazi flags and bile all over the studio.

  • http://crasstalk.com/ grandinquisitor

    Damn, and I just got my Luftwaffe uniform pressed.

    • Tundra Grifter

      giq:

      When I first came to San Francisco there was an excellent tailor in the first block of Ellis Street (just across from John's Grill). He was an elderly Jewish gentleman who'd survived WW II making uniforms for German airforce officers.

      • http://crasstalk.com/ grandinquisitor

        Damn, talk about unfulfilling work.

        • bagofmice

          Given the life expectancy of pilots, at least it was steady work.

  • http://facethesuncastnoshadow.wordpress.com/ Mumbletypeg

    For reasons I can't explain… that retracting cat-head lurking in the upper lefthand corner is so unsettling to me — and so apropos for completing the "Loser Pat" image. Well done, Blingee®-masters!

    • Guppy

      Ceiling Cat is watching Pat Buchanan masturbate.

    • freakishlywrong

      That would be "ceiling cat". Of the good ole' "I can haz" (worn out racist) days.

    • Biff

      Ceiling Cat, passing judgement…

    • jus_wonderin

      Ceiling Cat Rulez!!!

  • http://www.stumbleupon.com/stumbler/cheaphits/reviews cheaphits

    I'd like to see another doomed presidential run. Drain off some conservative votes from Rick or Willard…make a few bucks…why not, he's got lot's of time now.

    • flamingpdog

      Oh wow, I just got an early Friday morning epiphany from your post. There's a guy in my office named Rick Willard – I am so going to have to give him a hard time.

  • not that Dewey

    And yet,

    Chuck Todd
    Savannah Guthrie
    Joe Scarborough
    Mika Brzezinski
    Mike Barnicle
    Alex Witt
    Dylan Ratigan
    Jim Cramer
    etc

    Clearly, MSNBC is racist against white people.

  • IncenseDebate

    What a nattering nabob of negativity. Sheesh.

  • DaRooster

    But is he too late to get into the race?

    • SorosBot

      I'm sure he'll get the votes of all the elderly Jewish Palm Beach residents again.

    • chicken_thief

      Palin/Buchanan 2012!!!

      • GOPCrusher

        Buchanan/Robertson 2012! Pat is where it's at!

    • Gunner Asch

      He can mud-rassle Sarah at the brokered convention.

    • SoBeach

      Once upon a time, long, long ago, yours truly watched Pat give a campaign speech on the steps of the Florida Capitol. I kept a straight face and resisted the urge shout Sieg heil! at his applause lines. And get this, I even shook his hand afterward.

      He's a creepy guy who drew a creepy crowd. But hey, it was an entertaining way to kill a lunch hour.

      Pat was out of the race shortly after that speech, and some commie from Arkansas went on to win the presidency.

      Ah, the good old days.

  • paris biltong

    Wasn't he a speechwriter for Nixon? And can anyone remember anything Nixon said besides "I'm not a crook" (which wasn't even true)?

    • SorosBot

      "I have a secret plan to end the war" and "You won't have Dick Nixon to kick around anymore" – both also untrue.

    • Chichikovovich

      I've always had a soft spot for "Pat doesn't wear a fur coat, instead she's got a good Republican cloth coat", "when the President does it, that means it isn't against the law", [viewing the great wall of China] "it truly is a great wall", and most especially the two most maudlin displays of self-pity by a moral monster since Macbeth saw Birnham Wood approach Dunsinane: the 1974 resignation speech to his staff, and the glory of human achievement in the field of mawkishness that was the 1962 concession speech, especially the thrilling (if only it were true!): "You won't have Dick Nixon to kick around anymore. Because, gentlemen, this is my last press conference."

      I have to run, or I could keep at this all day. Ah, memories….

      • paris biltong

        My admittedly understated point was that Pat's pronouncements as uttered by the men of power whom he has served are eminently forgettable. He was too young to contribute the republican coat and was a Goldwaterite in the early sixties. What may be really fun to think about is how he felt about Kissinger.

      • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

        I'm fond of Tricky Dick leaning in close to the microphone and saying, "that would be wrong, that's for sure!"

        • http://zvibleindmeis.tumblr.com/ Spurning Beer

          "Raising a million dollars is NOOOOOOOO problem…. But it would be wrong.

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      Needs moar wiggling jowls.

      • Tundra Grifter

        And waving two fingers in the air.

        And – flat out – the world's worst, most cramped, anal, golf swing. Made Sir Charles look like the old Tiger.

    • MissTaken

      There was a theory that Pat was Deep Throat. Thankfully that was not true.

      • SorosBot

        My favorite theory was that it was Diane Sawyer; I was kind of disappointed when it turned out to be an FBI deputy I had never heard of.

      • Swampgas_Man

        Yeah, Dick watched that movie a dozen times, but never could get it down Pat.

    • GOPCrusher

      To this day, I'm still shocked that he ever got work again.

  • AddHomonym

    Throwback is thrown back.

  • CheeseNPear

    I want to thank Kaia for rewarding us with Derek's words after the break instead of Buchanan's whiny rant. A much more pleasant way to start my morning!

    • jus_wonderin

      I agree!!

  • Bezoar

    I may be a foolish optimist, in fact I know I am, but I predict that 'As goes Pat Buchanan, so goes the Wingnut Nation'.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      If Murdoch terminated FOX News, maybe.

  • bikerlaureate

    My heart's going, "Pity, Pat."

    • prommie

      Felix is a wonderful cat.

  • Biff

    So misunderstanding, so misunderstood…

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

    Sorry about that. I jumped so quickly to pure venomous rant that I left out the necessary Snark Quantum. It's early, and the drugs haven't kicked in yet.

    • GunToting[Redacted]

      What, are you new here? We live for quivering invective!

      • http://www.wonkette.com/ FlownOver

        Thanks for the clarification.

        btw, watch for the drop of "Quivering Invective's" new album, We Don' Have To Show You Any Steenkin' Long-Form Birth Certificate!"

    • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

      Drugs? did someone say drugs?

      • Tommmcattt

        We live for Drugs!

    • Lascauxcaveman

      He was a speechwriter for Nixon.

      I think that's about the nicest thing I could possibly come up with to say about the guy. I hope when he dies, they bury him next to Dick Cheney; that would make the grave-pissing a more convenient one-stop deal.

      • Terry

        I passed him once on the sidewalk in Georgetown. As much as I despise him, I have to admit that he wears a very nice aftershave. That is the only good thing I can say about him.

      • chicken_thief

        Dick Cheney with his robo-heart will never die.

      • ttommyunger

        You must enjoy standing in line.

    • Nothingisamiss

      Shit, I can't believe I didn't get here in time for quivering invective. I'm just full of my own Q.I. and I could really use some more.

      • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

        If we ever decide we want to class up this joint, we could change the name to Q.I. Some chumps might think it stands for Quality Investigations.

  • http://wonkette.com/ weej_bain

    Pat, Pat, do you forget that in the beloved FlyOvers the Klan used to burn crosses in the yards of Papists, like yourself, and not just the yards of those with an extra ration of melanin. When I was a kid in Wisconsin, our family had a Catholic neighbor from Nebraska who told us of the joys of his youth.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      The New, Rebranded Klan welcomes the tentacles of Rome.

  • prommie

    He was too mild an middle-of-the-road for the New, Tea Party-era conservatives!

    • jus_wonderin

      That is just so depressing.

    • FakaktaSouth

      And shit, he's Catholic. What the fuck is that? Evangelicals can talk straight to God thanks. Oh wait, no, we are all Catholics now? Or maybe just no fucking, or whatever, Irish people just hate the fucking? I don't know – I can't keep up with who to hate anymore. But Pat and his Mick-ish zealotry should piss off. (Being Irish and Pavlovianly-trained not to say anything that might sound dick-southern-type, I love being able to use tacky phrases for my people. It's like a kid saying swears. I wish I knew some more – besides just drunk, ornery, obnoxious, pregnant and whatever else we all are in my family all the time.)

      • Fare la Volpe

        Irish people just hate the fucking

        If the size of my dad's family is any indication, the Irish love the fucking.

        • FakaktaSouth

          For reals, MINE TOO (my whole fam, both sides) I wish there was a "Not intended as a factual statement" incredulity font.

          • prommie

            Oh, sure, we love fucking, same as everyone, but come on, we have priorities, it takes so much time, it interferes with the drinking. Thats why the term "Irish foreplay" refers to a purely theoretical concept and not a real thing.

          • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

            And don't forget the wife beating! Veeery time consuming, that.

          • prommie

            Whack-fol-the diddle.

          • FakaktaSouth

            That's why I married a guy of questionable Belgian descent. I get to do all the beating.

          • bagofmice

            I was going to say, if we're going to be doing Irish stereotypes here, it should involve drinking, fooking, and blowing things up. A redneck's redneck… except they get freckles.

        • Gainsbourg69

          My Irish grandfather loved fucking so much that he had nine kids.

      • HateMachine

        I can't speak to anything else you said, but Irish people most certainly do not hate fucking.

        • SorosBot

          It's just the birth control that they hate.

          • LagunaB

            And Oliver Cromwell.
            Our hate goes deep and long.
            But currently directed at rethugs/women haters.

          • prommie

            Life would be empty, without grudges to hold on to.

          • GorzoTheMighty

            Irish alzheimer's-you forget everything except the grudges

      • prommie

        Its all the Irish in South Carolina that make that place such a shithole. Noone can hate harder than the Irish, noone! My name, BTW, is Padraig.

        • FakaktaSouth

          My dad says it's we Scotch Irish assholes that make the whole south suck. So many settled down here, and we are a bunch of dicks.

          • prommie

            He pretty much nails it, yes.

          • prommie

            The Saint Patrick's Day parade in NYC is the single largest assembly of raging fucking assholes on the face of the planet, baying drunken shitheads, every one of them, worse even then an Auburn crowd, that Bama fan who teabagged the unconscious drunk, thats fucking nothing, these people live for mayhem, limbs and appendages, biting. Watch out when you fight a Mick, they fucking bite. Mike Tyson is probably part Mick.

          • FakaktaSouth

            And because I am an arbitrary shamrock shagger, this description here only makes me want to experience the St Patrick's Day parade all the more.
            Alabamians teabagging LSUers in a Krystal's is some kind of metaphor – I just don't know exactly how to capture the beauty yet.

          • prommie

            Oh, thats the best strategy to maximize drinking time and keep the courting time to a minimum, random hookups in the alley behind the dumpster! A real man doesn't put down his beer, same as playing softball.

          • HateMachine

            As in all things, the optimal solution is a beer helmet.

          • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

            A kid in one of my classes once described St. Patties day as "an angry Mardi Gras".

          • SorosBot

            In Philly at least you also get a lot of drunks who still will start raging against the English and claiming it was perfectly OK for terrorists to kill them. And they're mostly like third or fourth generation. Grr. I normally try to avoid going out on March 17.

          • prommie

            Have you ever hung out around any currently English-type peoples? The Irish are regarded as animals.

          • SorosBot

            Well I am an English-type person, so yes.

          • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

            Oh, cool! Next time some asshole bitches about something an African-American did, we'll just blame it on unwanted, rape-borne Scotch-Irish genes.

        • FakaktaSouth

          I get words stuck in my head the way I do songs. I have been walking around saying Padraig for 2 fucking hours now. I gotta go outside or something. (we was Brennan)

      • SorosBot

        Well here's what Pat's old boss Dick had to say about the Irish: "The Irish have certain – for example, the Irish can't drink. What you always have to remember with the Irish is they get mean. Virtually every Irish I've known gets mean when he drinks. Particularly the real Irish. "

        • FakaktaSouth

          That's because we are mean to begin with – it's the whole, making your personality more-so with liquor – Irish folks need not do this.
          ALso, I LOVE how any time ANY "kind" of person is mentioned, there could also be a "what racist thing did Nixon say about them" footnote. And I don't even know what Nixon was to ridicule him, besides a paranoid megalomaniac.

          • SorosBot

            The Nixon tapes are the gift that keeps on giving, when it comes to both the cursing and the bigotry.

          • HistoriCat

            I don't even know what Nixon was to ridicule him

            Well, I don't know what he was ethnically but he was raised a Quaker. If you take that along with the fact that two of the last three Democratic presidents have been Southern Baptist, I think some bizarre inverse religion rule must apply. We need to elect a Scientologist if we want a liberal president.

        • Fare la Volpe

          Hey now, I get really cuddly when I drink.

          Of course I first have to go outside and smash a couple of bottles against a dumpster to "work things out," but afterwards I'm all sunshine and smiles!

      • prommie

        As to this new coalition of the Fundie prods and the opus dei wing of the Catholics, that confuses me too. They are suppose to hate catholics, what with the 'works" thing (its a euphemism for giving charity, and charity goes against the protestant "let the lazy starve" work ethic), and then there is the fucking Pope! But it seems that the historical divide between fundies and catholics has been bridged by the emergence of the new anti-vatican II fundie catholics, and by the discovery of their shared love of fetuses and barefoot, pregnant, and subjegated women,

    • Ruhe

      It's like there is this ladder of conservative intellectual rigor (not automatically an oxymoron) with Buckley once at the top and each guy at every rung all the way down is looking at the guys below and thinking "Jesus, I'm with these idiots?" And now with the Tea Party they don't tolerate anything above "ground level" intellect. It's a herd mentality and they like to choose their leaders by the way they smell.

  • http://www.wonkette.com/ slowhansolo

    Stone free, to do as he please
    Stone free, to shoot the breeze
    Yeah, Pat can't stay, got to got to bash the gays

  • LiveToServeYa

    So, it's the Microsoft No Buchanan Channel? Good news!

  • Steverino247

    It's time for Pat to retire. Seriously. The guy's been at this since Nixon so hate him or love him, it's time for him to draw a nice warm bath, open some veins and enjoy a good wine while he fades to black.

    • Ruhe

      Tom Hagen approves.

  • http://www.wonkette.com Pres.Beeblebrox

    Yo dawg, I put a video in your video so you can get hit in the face with a pie while you get hit in the face with a pie.

  • hagajim

    Amazing how this ancient asshole was able to stay an asshole 40 years after he was even relevent. Good bye assmunch, your severence is this bag of salted dicks!

  • Monsieur_Grumpe

    My empathy seems to broken. Sorry Pat. Oh, there it is.

  • SorosBot

    But then she actually supports gay rights and the rights of her fellow vagina possessors – in fact I'm really not sure what she's still doing in the Republican party, other than pleasing daddy.

    • MissTaken

      Once daddy is six feet under I'm sure our Megs will bounce, bounce, bounce her tig ole bitties to the Dems where she truly belongs.

      • SorosBot

        Oh, I would like to see that; she really is in the wrong party given her politics. And those boobs are nice, although they don't compare to my favorite pair of big bouncy breasts.

      • horsedreamer_1

        Democrat Megz will be Ron Reagan, Jr., with a tit job. Like Marilyn Mansonon the Mechanical Animals jacket.

    • bagofmice

      Inheritance is a hell of a drug.

  • teebob2000

    Awwww, now Morning Joe will have to find fill-in bigots!!

    "And now here is Pat Buchanan being hit in the face with a pie tin filled with spooge from 47 gay men."

    /fixed

    • freakishlywrong

      Mark Halperin called the President a "dick" and he's still on. And Joe maybe or maybe not be a racist, but he's a right-wing shill of the highest order. And an obnoxious cocksucker to boot.

  • http://simplyleftbehind.blogspot.com/ actor212

    *sniffsniff*

    Anybody else smell that?

    Smells like "You can't fire me! I quit!" burning on the stove.

  • HateMachine

    If only the Tan-Americans and Vagina-Americans knew what it was like to bear my burdens. It can be hard to stand up straight beneath the weight of all this privilege.

    • Nostrildamus

      This comment has not been deleted by the user.

  • Biff

    MSNBC has a long history of firing people whose ideology differs from their own. Shouty Keith, Cenk, David Schuster, and now Pat. One of these is not like the others.

  • occams8ball

    I always thought when "petticoat junction" was cancelled, Pat took whatever character actor work he could get.

    • GOPCrusher

      LOL! His Mr. Haney character on Green Acres was epic.

  • chascates

    He'll still be infecting The McLaughlin Group if anyone can stand to watch that freak show. Maybe Stormfront needs a new public face. Without a white hood I mean.

  • Barb

    Love ya like a cold sore Pat!

  • Biff

    For true, but that was before I had TV so I give myself a pass.

  • not that Dewey

    OT: Dave Mustaine denies endorsing Santorum, although he's still apparently a douchebag republitard. I wouldn't want that shit staining my reputation, either.

    • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

      But he did say he wants the Repubican to win because Obama is "the most divisive president we've ever had." More divisive than Buchanan (James) is a remarkable accomplishment of historical ignorance. (Although you could argue Lincoln was literally the most divisive as his election triggered Southern secession.)

    • GOPCrusher

      Megadeth still sucks.

      • not that Dewey

        No disputing that.

  • SorosBot

    Fired despite having the highest ratings on MSNBC for daring to oppose the invasion of Iraq. And that's the supposed liberal news network.

  • gullywompr

    Yeah, that's great and all, but can you really applaud a network that has Krystal Ball as one of their regular commentators?

    • CapnFatback

      I believe the real question is can I not applaud such a network?

    • SorosBot

      Yes I can, with my penis.

      • gullywompr

        No kidding? Just what is the sound of one penis clapping, exactly?

        • Geminisunmars

          Ummm, splat?

        • rickmaci

          Fap fap fap.

    • Gainsbourg69

      What the fuck did her parents name her brother, Uni?

      • ShaveTheWhales

        Blue.

  • http://wonkette.com/ starfanglednut

    He's OUT at MSNBC? We can only hope he'll soon be joined by Marcus.

  • V572 Flambé

    Say hello to Novak when you see him, Pat!

    It's good to know that MSNBC is filling the gaping void in their programming by broadcasting Whitney Houston's funeral live.

    But it's sad that we won't have the opportunity hear Pat's Catholic jehadi views on the birth control issue.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Don't worry Pat — old racists never die — they just cling to the vine whilst everything they hold dear is repudiated and replaced with fresh, vibrant multicultural new growth. Probably sucks worse than death sometimes, too.

  • http://hong-kong-actresses.blogspot.com/ donner_froh

    Pat Buchanan can kiss my Irish ass.

    There was a real blacklist in the United States led by HUAC that destroyed careers and ruined lives of a lot of creative people who were guilty of nothing more than exercising constitutionally guaranteed rights. To conflate this with Buchanan's employer finally telling him that he is costing them money and harming their brand is disgusting and cowardly.

  • Nopantsmcgee

    The end of an error.

  • elburritodeluxe

    Cool! Now, can Mexico please start annexing Texas and Arizona?

  • http://www.storycorner.us/ JustPixelz

    Someday Fox will fire someone … for something non-loofah related.

  • Naked_Bunny

    I hope that was a santorum pie.

  • http://sickrantorum.com KenLayIsAlive

    I must say Kaia, you certainly do bring the blingee.

    Also Pat Buchanan is a rat turd in America's milk. also.

    • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

      Darlin', you've been gone for so long I feared you'd taken another grrl to Ecuador. Then I clicked on your name to see when you posted last. That's quite a creation! Kaia's not the only one who brings the blingee.

      • http://sickrantorum.com KenLayIsAlive

        I wouldn't do that. Just been sleeping off a years worth of substance abuse, that's all. ; )

        I'm listening to the The River and thinking about our trip to Ecuador right now.

  • Exhausted66

    Editor's Note: Please change Blingee image from Pat Bukakke to Pat Buchanan. Wonkette regrets the error.

  • Troglodeity

    Looks like he got hit with a Whiter Shade of Santorum.

  • proudgrampa

    Old bigots never die, they just ____________.

    Any suggestions?

  • MosesInvests

    The United States Marine Corps Scout Snipers regret this.

  • HamsterSandwich

    Best post on Pat's web site after Pat gave his bigoted rant telling his followers why he was fired, came from this guy.

    Reverend Mik McAllister, on February 16th, 2012 at 6:20 pm Said:

    "That homosexual acts are unnatural and immoral has been doctrine in the Catholic Church for 2,000 years." <— Buchanon statement

    1. The Catholic church has not existed for 2000 years.
    2. Homosexuality was not considered against doctrine until roughly the 13th century. (Paul’s epistles are political tracts meant to prejudice people against the Romans, who – gasp – allowed same sex relations)
    3. Virtually every species has examples of homosexuality. How can it be unnatural?
    4. Immoral means "violating one’s moral code" – not violating someone else’s moral code. Your moral code in no way governs anyone else’s unless they choose to adopt the same code.

    I can find no redeeming value in you being allowed a pulpit to trumpet your hate and intolerance on MSNBC. You are not an expert on Christianity (proven by your quotes of Leviticus, among others). You are simply a hateful man who delights in leading others to pain and suffering. I hope you find your rightful place in history, with the likes of Jim Baker, Jimmy Swagger, Fred Phelps, and other self-aggrandizing con artists.

    And yes, that is my real name, and I am indeed a minister. I speak for no one but myself. I was called to help others, regardless of the color of their skin, the gender of their loving spouse, the amount of money in their wallet, the building they worship in, or the medical procedures they needed or had in the past. That is a minister.

    Should you ever be given a second chance, I have no faith that you will rise to the occasion. Because ministering to those in need, for you, is unimportant when compared to the chance to fill your pockets with cash and to fill the faces of those around you with hate and fear.

    You may maintain that your God will forgive you. God’s forgiveness may be infinite, but His gullibility is not. Asking forgiveness without any intention of changing your ways is nor repentance, it’s lying.

    It always amazes me how those who preach hate and intolerance feel that it is appropriate to pray to God with the same mouth.

    • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

      Are you creating hairs to split? According to Apple's (New Oxford) Dictionary: Immoral means "not conforming to accepted standards of morality." Merriam Webster: "conflicting with generally or traditionally held moral principles."

      • HamsterSandwich

        The comment was Mik McAllister's, not mine. However, other than that split hair, I agree with most of it.

        • http://loljazzcatz.blogspot.com/ Chet Kincaid

          My mistake!

  • MUHAMMED_PBUH

    Intelligent conservatives like Buchanan who could clearly articulate and defend their loathsome viewpoints and are willing to actually engage with their opponents have now been almost completely excluded from the national media by reflexive, automated outrage on the left. In their absence, we've been left with petty pundits like Michael Steele, his counterpart Lawrence O'Donnell and all their disingenuous ilk . Truly this is a victory for the forces of justice, etc.

    • GOPCrusher

      I will give Pat credit for one thing. Shortly after the President's election and the Republiklans started getting more shouty and ragey, he did try to distance himself from the modern Republiklan Party.
      But he was still an racist asshole.

  • rickmaci

    Bad timing for Buchanan. He was an intolerant, racist, homophobic, misogynistic Republican bigot too far before his time.

  • fuflans

    i think as a matter of principle we should fire anyone who advised a president EIGHT PRESIDENTS ago.

    just for, you know, relevance.

  • http://www.southsidejohnny.com/ Jukesgrrl

    Of all the invectives being tossed around here related to Pat, no one's directly discussed his massive ego. Surely someone who worked for the administration that sent the most felons to prison in my lifetime should have a little humility. The term unindicted co-conspirator was tailor-made for Pat. (And maybe his buddy Joe Scarborough, too.)

  • ttommyunger

    Small victories are somehow not satisfying. Now, if he were videotaped having his 'nads nailed to a stump, then being pushed over backwards?

  • http://www.marionstein.net MarionNYNY

    When I saw the headline about his being "out" I thought you meant something else. Also in addition to the gays and the blacks, he hates Jews, even the ones who voted for him in Florida.