What the hell is this? It is the video promo for Sarah Palin’s CPAC keynote on Saturday, guessing from the killer alien Nazis from space come to destroy humanity, as punishment. Oh hey now, isn’t the invasion of a secret troupe of moon Hitlers supposed to be Mitt Romney’s special fever dream?
“Shit, this just keeps getting better and better,” says Sarah of the moon Nazi invasion. Secretary of State Bristol Palin agrees. [YouTube]
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Just yodel and their heads will explode.
Ack ack ack ack ack ack
I've been looking forward to this for years.
Hell yes. This is the same group that made Star Wreck, right? It looks like their CGI's gotten a lot better.
Where is my tinfoil hat, damnit?
I know. I misplace mine all the time. I must have put it out with the recycling.
"Secretary of State Bristol Palin"
I always envisioned Bristol as head of the FDA.
Freakin' Dumb Asses?
Frighteningly Dull Assholes?
Foil & Dye Afros?
Fucking Die Already?
And Willow, as a beautician, will be the Brazilian ambassador.
special envoy to Analwaxistan.
The bleachingista?
"I always envisioned Bristol as head of the FDA. "
Think about it: you put Brisdull in charge of the food and drugs, there wouldn't be any left for anyone else.
Centers for Disease Control.
Or not.
UDSA is more like it.
Or ambassador to Wasillastan.
If moon nazis invade my town I will take them too my leader.
Also.
As someone once remarked to Schubert …
I'll take them to my leder…hosen. Good first impressions are important with invaders.
Actually, this was Ronald Reagan's dream. Too much Alzheimers and Jelly Bellies.
Um, fap?
Thus illustrating the ambivalent feelings of many regarding fascist uniforms and/or Sarah Palin lookalikes.
Do you know who else led an invasion of a secret troupe of moon Hitlers?
Newt?
H. G. Wells?
Andy Williams?
o/~ Mooon Hitler….whiter than a Heil….o/~
Mel Brooks?
Springtime for Hitler on Mercury …
Charles Lindbergh?
The bad guys in Rocket Ship Galileo?
Pink Floyd? (Roger Waters era)?
Crow T. Robot?
REM?
Moon Unit Zappa?
This looks WAY better than "Left Behind VII: A New Beginning"
Is that the one they made after they found Spock?
Left Behind VII: A Brand New Behind
New Moon
NEEDZ MOAR CGI!
Needs MOAR hard drugs.
Or at least some serious paint huffing.
NEEDZ MORE ASSPLOSIONS & BOOMS! ALSO ROBOTS!
This looks WAY better than "Left Behind VII:
A New BeginningJesus Comes Again"Fixed.
When Jesus comes, does he shout his own name?
"Oh, Dad!! Oh, Dad!!!"
Ironsky has ties to Alinsky.
THEY HAVE WATCHED OUR PLANET
THEY HAVE STUDIED OUR CULTURE.
THEY HAVE LAUGHED THEIR ASSES OFF
THEY SAID "SCREW THIS, WE'RE MOVING TO MARS"
GET YOUR ASS TO MARS!
MARS, BITCHES!
I have pondered this idea of what aliens would conclude if they had been watching us all this time & had studied our culture(s). Seriously, I think the parts that they wouldn't laugh at would actually terrify them into never trying to invade.
In other words they'd be thinking: "You think we'd have a chance? Look at how they treat each other! Humans found a way to split the atom simply to kill other members of their own species!"
She can see Mercury from her house.
Is she taking her temperature rectally *again*?
She can see Uranus from her house.
No she can't. I'm sitting down.
That's why I always wear underwear.
You know who else invaded us from the moon?
Wait…what?
Hitler?
The She-Werewolves of the S.S.?
Moon bats?
That traitor Buzz Aldrin?
South Korean mega-preachers?
we gone be doin one thin and one thin only: killin nazis!
sound GOOOD!?!?!?
No, this looks a lot more mature than Tarantino.
I must say that I thought Pitt nailed that accent.
Ha – I happen to know some of the people behind this movie! Trust me, the Sarah Palin character will be an even bigger arse than in real life….
BTW, this comes mostly from socialist paradise Finland who's biggest export in Angry Birds. Actually this is a crowdsourced movie in many ways – but you had to be an EU citizen to actually invest in it for some reason.
Nevertheless, some really cool folks behind this – I wish it well!
I'm sorry, Johnny, that's just not possible.
Yeah, "Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning" was amazing for a movie turned out by a bunch of guys in an apartment with their friends.
And don't even get me started on Tiina Routamaa…
Yeah, I've been hearing about this movie for a while. Looking forward to it!
Finns be crazy.
/part Finnish
Honest to God joke from 1940:
Q: Why did Stalin fire all his airplane designers?
A: There was a fin on very tail!
If I have to explain it, I will…
On Nordic Blonde: A Finnish Tail
Finns are awesome, I was lucky to spend a lot of time there and meet a lot of people who remain friends to this day. One time I was taken on a train ride to a car rally – lots of drinking on the way up – and then there (was that a car that went past???) – and then on the way back. Anyway we are in the bar car and the Finns are all singing. I ask my host what the song is and he says "oh, just an old folk song, something like – we welcome you Russians to our country and when you are not looking we will slit your throats and eat your intestines"
Emmmm…. Ok…. !!!
The Winter War, betw. Finland and Russia during WWII, was fucking brutal. And the Russians lost.
Am I correct that Finland was the only European country to save its Jews from the Nazis? Or was that Denmark?
Finland saved it's Jews from the Nazis so they could kill them themselves.
Finland has this very balancing-on-the-edge-of-Blade-Runner look to it. I mostly know about the country from Conan O'Brein's trip, there, and from Little Finland being up here in Michigan's UP, eh?
Well I was promised anal with Bristol if I would buy a copy of her fucking book, that's all I know and care about.
Why do I hear a banjo? No, wait. Two banjos!!
I thinks they may be duelin', too.
Be sure and make her wear a condom, Crank.
She said I wouldn't get pregnant, and she knows all about that kinda stuff.
Well, experience is the best teacher; but the tuition is so dang high!
Dude, ewwww.
Sarah Palin’s CPAC keynote on Sunday,
The far right obviously has a punishment fetish.
Sarah Palin: GOP cilice
I hope they stocked up on Kleenex for all the ear-bleeding.
Nailin' Palin: The Final Frontier?
Nailin' Palin Meets Downfall: Journey to the Crater of the Bottom
Nailin' Bristol Palin: The Next Degeneration.
Hey! Palin's wardrobe got an upgrade! And WE paid for it!
Assuming, like most invading aliens, they feed off brains, I say we send them Santorum along with Palin, so that they starve to death.
needz moar Duck Dodgers
Ah, Tuesday nights on Lake Union. I miss that.
At gasworks?
No, my buddy had his boat moored at the floating community and mini marina between the Montlake bridge and Madison Park. I remember midnight Hibachi parties and swims off his boat in Lake Washington – as late as November. The Duck Dodge was just a big party, and we never finished anywhere near the top. His boat was a slightly larger version of this, and plenty slow. He made it himself while attending the Port Townsend School of Boat building. The chicks dug it. I got to be the token guitar player, and our specialty was taking the girls for a nighttime sail and making up ribald sea chanties, there in the middle of a lake, in the middle of the city, in the middle of the night.
So, when I talk about my wasted youth, yeah, I'm actually being facetious.
Space Nazis or Palins–which ones am I supposed to be rooting for?
Go with the Space Nazis. They can probably communicate in English.
I find it hard to believe that they would actually fight on opposite sides.
"Gosh darn it, those fascist family values just make so much common sense."
I'm certain this is what Jefferson and Madison envisioned. But then of course, they were libruls, who are Communists, you know.
Please; at this point I have a better shot at being President in 2018 than Palin.
SorosBot/Moon Nazi 2018!
Nah you can be my running mate. Just think, you'd be the first woman to run for VP who is actually attractive!
Yay! When you deliver the SOTU I can throw paper airplanes at your head!
And for the first time in my life I will be truly proud of my country.
Ooh – can I be press secretary? Only I demand a strict "tell it like it is" provision in my contract.
Sure, why not? In fact my entire cabinet will be you fellow Wonkette commenters.
Hilarity ensues
And drinking. And buttsecks.
I could be Secretary of the Interior, if you know what I mean.
Can I be Secretary of DHS (Dept. of Homoland Sercurity)? *jumps up & down" oh please, please, please?!
Ooh ooh, dibs on secretary of beer and roller coasters!
Dibs on Secretary Of Altered States!
Hell, you've got my vote.
Hell, I can't even watch a faux Sarah depiction where she appears competent. My brain hurts. And I like sci-fi.
I hate Moon Nazis.
Moon Nazi's…Fuck Offf!!!
Take the Moon Nazi's bowling, take them bowling!
Milkmen are dead, no, they really are, but Cracker PAC lives on!
My money's on the nazi moon people in a squirmish with $arah Palin. She'll quit before the first blitzkrieg.
She'll quit before the first halb blitzkrieg.
Plan 9 from Outer Space will shortly be joined in infamy. Did anyone on set yell "T'row me da visky and let's shoot dis fokker"? This might, like Plan 9 be worth watching for yucks. I wonder if a Glen or Glenda? remake is coming soon?
I Wood not think so.
Pull the string!
I call for Joel and the bots to do the commentary on this movie.
C'mon, for this thing, Mike could do just as well.
Hell, maybe even just Pearl!
Mike is kind of a rightwinger…
But, in fairness, he has never let that get in the way of the funny….,
Which might make him along with the PJ O'Rourke the only "funny" Conservatives that can claim that.
That feature appears to be pre-baked.
The moon nazis were quiet until Newt started all that 51st state talk. May be best foreign film of the year.
Oh good – another movie to ignore.
Oh My God Win!
Will no one say, "I see what you did there" to you? Fine, I will. But it took me a minute.
Awesome.
I'm really glad someone's clever tonight. My brain's still too much in shock from seeing this.
If Lou Sarah is President in 2018, is it wrong for me to root for the Nazi's?
M-O-O-N, another chance to plug my latest script!
CSI: Moonbase Alpha
On the last episode, Moon Elf Queen Calista ordered the palace detective squad to investigate Emperor Pig Newton's ability to continue to deliver Tiffany diamonds.
Meanwhile Emperor Newton confirmed that he will continue the struggle against the Reptiloid forces of Lord Rmoney from the Galaxy Circinus.
And Moonbassador Palin demanded an increase in her budget for "Space Nazi Defense, and stuff".
~
♫ When the moon hits your eye
Like a big-a Nazi spy
That's Amore! ♫
Eep, opp, ork, ah ah, that means I love you.
R2, is that you???
Thats a classic by Jet Screamer; Judy Jetson won a date with him.
♫ When the Newt's moonstruck fools
Buy Callista a jewel
That's a Whore-ey ♫
Does this mean that John Galt has come out of hiding to save us?
Fucking Michael Bay really outdid himself with this one. My favorite part is the Pauldenburg blimp going down in flames @ 1:43.
That's what Megan Fox thought, and where is she now?
Bristol is going to sign on to whatever reality show our new masters submit.
way to go 'blind spot pictures'. just when she was rapidly descending the ash pit of history, you go and give her ego an unwarranted boost.
This looks like the best movie ever made.
And here I thought the biggest news of the day was that the Duchess of Windsor was a blow-job queen. http://abcnews.go.com/Health/wallis-simpson-inter…
Better than "Atlas Shrugged part 2"?
Hell yes!!!!!!!
It's even better than Left Behind IV.
Oh, like that's news…
It was news to me.
Unfortunately I found out long after she died so it's not news I can use.
Ghoulish Senator Frothy might be up for a hook-up with her.
Umm, wouldn't that be "blow-job duchess?'
Yes, I suppose it would.
My knowledge of how sexually active albeit asexual royals are to be referred to is woefully substandard.
Thanks for setting me straight.
I think it's all in "Burke's Peerage," in the all-new Blowjobs Appendix.
Ah, yes, the Duchess of Lowball & Cornhole.
Will there be a special cameo by Joe the Plumber?
Yes there will be. In one scene somewhere in the middle, the Moon Nazis are succeeding. President Palin is down on her luck and crying. Then, suddenly, the White House plumbing department manager comes and gives her a rousing victory speech. This fails to improve her attitude on winning, so he takes his plunger and sticks it in her face. This snaps her out of it, and she gets back to a teleconference with her generals, then the plumber drives off in a van.
Who was that ass-crack pants man?
He'll be cleaning Palin's pipes. Wait, this movie is a porno, right?
Critics agree! It's pants-shittingly shitty!
Will they bring anal probes? Don’t aliens always bring anal probes?
It must be pointed out that that is a stereotype. Only the Little Greys have probes. Now, I don't think we want to discuss what the other aliens bring.
Granted, the Little Greys do have large probes. Which is terrifying, or fun, depending on your perspective.
The little Greys must frequent the Southern U.S. Most of the alien encounters there involve trailer dwellers who have been annually probed often by a being who has taken the shape of a family member.
Thanks for the information.
This is CPAC. The anal probes are already among us.
Oh, you’re right. It is off to the closet (water or otherwise; real or metaphorical) to assume the wide stance…
Is that Santorum on the seat?
They're going to be pretty busy, considering the number of assholes that will be present.
Do you think more catchers than pitchers…?
Geez, the Moon really is a harsh mistress.
Oh for fuck's sake. (this will be a cut and paste comment this weekend-Nov 2).
I love that comment. We should definitely keep it on retainer.
So if Newt wants to go to the moon, that probably makes him Neville Chamberlain.
Needs moar Flesh Gordon.
"Cis, and Decease!"
I do think a Sex Ray would help move the story along. At least it's got a Zeppelin-Phallus.
Dude, if Sarah Palin became president I'd PRAY for fuckin' Moon Nazis.
"I have had it with these motherfucking Nazis on the motherfucking moon!"
Will they take her home and deprive us of her leadership?
Giving her fake respect long enough to fool them could, could kill us.
It is the video promo for Sarah Palin’s CPAC keynote on Sunday
Impossible–the Palin character here is much more intelligent than the Palin character IRL…
What? They couldn't have sprung for 3D?
We never should have smoked that weed and got the munchies and ate that giant marshmallow-baby Moonbase Gingrich…
That's why Newt is 2 Ballchins ahead of Sarah Failin'. We must colonize the moon first!
And if your head asplodes with dark movie previews,
I'll see you on the Dark Side of the Moon.
Sci-Fi writer David Brin (kinda) saw this one coming. Only he got the pantheon of Norse Gods involved, too.
I'll have to read that one. I love Brin; Earth is one of my top five favorite books.
He's good. Even better in short story form. One of my fave collections is River of Time which you should get, if you don't have it already.
Geez, Saturday Night Live promos are getting better, that was Tina Fey wasn't it?
You know who else…oh fuck it.
You know, in any scenario where Americans elected Sarah Palin president for life, I'm pretty sure I might end up rooting for the Moon Nazis.
If the Moon Nazis invade, which side will the USMC Scout Snipers fight on? (See Mother Jones for explanation.)
For some reason I find myself cheering for the Nazi.
I totally believed it until "The battle for Earth is gonna get Nazi." Everyone knows Germans have no sense of humor, and that even if they did, they wouldn't stoop to abominable puns like that one.
But we will. There is no bottom to our abonimable puns. Except for the asses making them.
That's a no-shitter. Just read the lightbulb thread.
Somebody found Philip K. Dick's stash!!
If I didn't know this was a comedy, I'd say this was a cross between Mars Needs Women and Castle Wolfenstein.
Just how in hell am I supposed to Godwin this?
Moon Nazis are people too and as such deserve one term under Palin.
Not only do I find the lead in this tale fuckable, her glasses make me want to fuck her and then talk with her for a couple of hours afterward. Odd, that.
If we are stupid enough to elect Sarah Palin president, then we deserve whatever punishment the Moon Nazis see fit to dole out to us.
Will you guys hate me if I become a collaborator?
Yes.
I meant, with the Nazis.
Needz moar Tina Fey.
I notice that the Moon Nazis waited until the Schvartze was out of office before attacking.
Just think what might be hiding on the dark side of Mercury.
Ummm…WTF?!
BTW, this would be so much better with Britney Spears casted as the president.
One of these days, Sarah…one of these days…Bang! Zoom! Right to da' Moon!
Fucking moon. I knew there was a reason I don't trust it. I'm not just paranoid like the doctors said!!!!!1!!
Arbeit Mach 5!
Fucken Werewolves of Luna.
Is this the sequel to Surf Nazis Must Die? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8LV1S2q2GA
This looks like fun! Weeeeeee
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