PUT ON YR HANUKKAH SWEATER VEST  5:29 pm February 8, 2012

Rick Santorum Fetes The Jews With New Testament Quote

by Jim Newell

Rick Santorum knew just what the Jews of South Carolina wanted to hear around Hanukkah time: A quote from Jesus in the New Testament threatening people who don’t follow him. That means you, Jews! Oh, brother. Also: “Holiday Season”? There is no such thing. Rick Santorum hates Christmas. [via Hunter Walker]

 
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{ 207 comments }

Local_Mojo February 8, 2012 at 5:32 pm

I don't care what people say, that ad with Rick and the kids playing catch with Gabriel is really sweet.

Nostrildamus February 8, 2012 at 7:29 pm

Does he throw him through a tire swing at the end?

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 10:58 pm

Now watch this drive.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:26 pm

I like when they play football and spike him in the end zone.

Chillwillard February 8, 2012 at 5:32 pm

Haven't the Jews suffered enough?

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Well, there are some Christians who think they haven't.

beavertank February 8, 2012 at 10:16 pm

We all have to suffer this fool together. The Jews can take another for the team.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:27 pm

Fundamentalist Christians want them to suffer, forever, if they don't follow The Jeebus at the end.

pinkocommi February 9, 2012 at 2:45 am

Heh, heh, heh… "Team Santorum." Kind of makes you wonder what all those staffers are doing there at campaign headquarters.

Lucidamente1 February 8, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Wait, there are Jews in South Carolina?

Preferred Customer February 8, 2012 at 5:42 pm
Lucidamente1 February 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

A shande far di goyim.

flamingpdog February 8, 2012 at 5:47 pm

It's all about the Benjamins!

bagofmice February 8, 2012 at 7:17 pm

It's all about the Benjamins bibi!

Chillwillard February 8, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Only the ones who donate to Lindsey Graham's campaign.

littlebigdaddy February 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

Oldest synagogue in the US is in Charleston. Read Pat Conroy's Beach Music.

Radiotherapy February 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Of course, they own Pedro's South of the Border.

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:15 pm

To be fair, I believe one member of SC Team Santorum asked another member (the other half of team): "Southern Jews are still Christians, right?"

Preferred Customer February 9, 2012 at 10:41 am

Did they have to flip to decide which one would be Lube and which one would be Fecal?

Lucidamente1 February 8, 2012 at 5:34 pm

In fairness to Rick, they are probably Jews for Jesus.

thebeatgoeson February 8, 2012 at 7:51 pm

I am playing words with friends with one right now. Born again Christian / Messianic Jew. Luckily she doesn't discuss religion with this agnostic Unitarian!

MosesInvests February 8, 2012 at 9:48 pm

Vegetarians for Veal.

Fare la Volpe February 9, 2012 at 7:33 am

Environmentalists for Coal.

Negropolis February 9, 2012 at 9:55 pm

Yeah, but this new coal, it's "clean". Didn't you hear? Clean coal!

I almost lost my dinner just typing that.

BornInATrailer February 8, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Ah-hahahaha. What a fuckin' retard.

HistoriCat February 8, 2012 at 6:07 pm

"Card for the Jews. Hey – what's this Chakakan thing about?"
"Uh – something about a festival of lights I think"
"Oh here's a 'Light of the World' bible quote – that will be perfect!"

ttommyunger February 8, 2012 at 6:58 pm

How did you get that past the dreaded "Administrator"? The last time I used that word in a comment I got the Indian Burn from Hell on my ego.

BornInATrailer February 8, 2012 at 7:00 pm

I think in celebration of Newell's return, the bad word cork got popped, like a champagne bottle full of santorum.

Drink up!

ttommyunger February 8, 2012 at 7:04 pm

Good. That is an important and unique word sorely needed in this Republican Primary Season.

HogeyeGrex February 9, 2012 at 3:32 am

"Retard" is pretty useful in any Republican Primary Season.

Inchhigh February 8, 2012 at 5:34 pm

Frothy the Doh! man

Tundra Grifter February 8, 2012 at 5:35 pm

Can anyone show me a quote using "Judeo-Christian tradition" from before 1950?

I think this was made up to cover Christian guilt when they finally realized all their nice Jewish friends were going straight to Hell.

HateMachine February 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

I think it probably had more to do with WASPs finally deciding to count their Jewish friends as white people*.

*sometimes, whenever it was convenient.

Boojum_Reborn February 8, 2012 at 5:55 pm

It started when they realized that there were religions other than Christian and the Killers of Jesus.

Mahousu February 8, 2012 at 6:07 pm

Actually, the term seems to have become popular after World War I as a means of distinguishing the West from the Communists and, later, the Nazis. The earliest hit that Google News gives is 1927, but it is clear it was already in use before then.

It became fairly common during World War II, particularly by Jewish organizations in the U.S. as a not-so-subtle hint to pay attention to the fate of the Jews in Europe. After the war, especially during the McCarthy period, it was used in a similar way to point out not all Jews were Communists. (Anticommunism and antisemitism were often closely linked in the '50's.)

Sorry, no snark here.

Chet Kincaid February 8, 2012 at 6:25 pm

So as a PR move, the MorMen and Scientologists should start referring to our "Insano-Christian Heritage."

Tundra Grifter February 8, 2012 at 6:47 pm

Mahousu:

No snark needed. Interesting. I wonder if it also became popular when Jewish people united with Black folks to combat racism. I know American Jews worked hard on Civil Rights. That would fit the between the Wars timeframe.

I can see some of the good Baptists waking up one morning and thinking "Geez – those guys helping us really aren't Christians, are they?" And then trying to do something about it.

While it was "in use" by the mid-20's, it appears to me it became popular in the 1950's.

Either way, to apply it all the way to Colonial times is revision with a vengeance.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:32 pm

Hmmm…I always thought it was a way conservatives wanted to try to capture the community's votes and money, a real kind of convenient assimilation to keep their friends close and enemies closer.

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 11:01 pm

you know who else closely linked anti-semitism and anti-communism…

MosesInvests February 9, 2012 at 12:04 am

The Lithuanian "patriots" who murdered my great-aunts and their families. Sorry, no snark there.

much_ado February 9, 2012 at 12:51 pm

The earliest usage I found in Google Books was in 1881 (there were several in the 1880s): Dickinson's Theological Quarterly, vol 7 (1881), p. 114, "They have learned in their studies that pure and complete theism never existed, in a general manner, save in the Judeo-Christian tradition, and has always rested on a basis of faith."

Lit Happens February 8, 2012 at 5:35 pm

I don't think you'd want to do a Google image search on "Team Santorum." Or maybe you would.

weej_bain February 8, 2012 at 6:13 pm

Team Santorum thongs? At least they're made in the USA, USA, USA, but none union bug.

PsycWench February 8, 2012 at 7:10 pm

A headline on CNNs website is "Romney promises to get more aggressive with Santorum". Perhaps we should all brace ourselves.

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 11:03 pm

" ain't no real bruhs on team santorum"

Roland Martin

elviouslyqueer February 8, 2012 at 5:35 pm

"Oy to the World," indeed.

BornInATrailer February 8, 2012 at 5:36 pm

Even one 'L' Michele thinks that took a lot of chootspa.

Lucidamente1 February 8, 2012 at 5:37 pm

You do not want to see the cards he sends out for Ramadan.

Extemporanus February 8, 2012 at 5:37 pm

There are miraculous stories of Santorum burning for eight days as well.

Geminisunmars February 8, 2012 at 6:54 pm

And didn't the smell drive out the money-changers or something?

Extemporanus February 9, 2012 at 12:00 am

The burning, the itching, the redness, the smelloy, how they kvetched about that Santorum!

(Um, Jews? One word: Foreskin.)

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 11:04 pm

I heard Jesus turned Santorum into wine. Which eventually led to the creation of more Santorum.

Viscous circle, that.

Extemporanus February 9, 2012 at 12:06 am

Hakuna my caca, Crank.

The end is near…

flamingpdog February 8, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Those little dreidels in the corner look like they're flipping the bird.

emmelemm February 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

They totally do!

MissTaken February 8, 2012 at 6:11 pm

They aren't?

M.L. Rowland February 10, 2012 at 11:41 am

They do! Crack me up!

DerrickWildcat February 8, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Is it the Jewish God that hates homos or the Christian God?

Chillwillard February 8, 2012 at 5:46 pm

All of 'em, Katie.

Radiotherapy February 8, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Jesus was a lib and was down with hanging out with twelve guys. The holy ghost is a Russ-loving ditherhead. God is into S&M. Allah is totally NOT cool with the ghey. Moroni too. Zeus and Apollo were ghey. The funniest thing about supernatural beings is that the devil has been known to say: "I don't want any fags down here."

Negligently_Joe February 8, 2012 at 5:53 pm

Isn't there a scene in the Bible where Jesus blessed some Roman soldier's Rentboy, also too?

LetUsBray February 8, 2012 at 6:28 pm

"And bless your vewy great fwiend in Wome, Biggus Diccus."

Chet Kincaid February 8, 2012 at 6:30 pm

And his wife, Incontinentia Buttocks!

Boojum_Reborn February 8, 2012 at 5:55 pm

12 guys and a hoor, mind you.

BornInATrailer February 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

Don't forget the fag hag!

CapnFatback February 8, 2012 at 5:39 pm

Each card came attached to a delicious spiral ham.

V572 Flambé February 8, 2012 at 5:39 pm

At least he didn't reproach them for snuffing Jebus.

Geminisunmars February 8, 2012 at 6:53 pm

Wait until you see his Pesach cards.

johnnymeatworth February 8, 2012 at 5:39 pm

Reminds me of Kinky Friedman talking about how, as a boy, he always knew when Easter was coming because other kids would come up to him and ask "Why did your people kill our Lord?"

SpiderCrab February 9, 2012 at 8:59 am

Kinky learned his lesson. He threw his political weight behind Rick Perry's candidacy.

johnnymeatworth February 9, 2012 at 11:38 am

Yeah, I was really hoping that Kinky was just laying groundwork for his own presidential bid with that–"You voted for that idiot, why NOT vote for me?"

edgydrifter February 8, 2012 at 5:40 pm

Merry Jewmas!
We're Sorry You'll All Be Burning in Hell with the Muslims Soon!

–Team Santorum

PeaceWithHonor February 8, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Trust Rick Santorum to skull-fuck irony.

BarackMyWorld February 8, 2012 at 6:44 pm

I can't stop laughing at this.

flamingpdog February 8, 2012 at 5:42 pm

"Peace to you this Holiday Season"

Damn printer chopped off the line below it that said "But Bomb, bomb, bomb – bomb, bomb Iran!"

ChernobylSoup February 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm

Why didn't he include the scripture passage that bans birth control?

Oh.

flamingpdog February 8, 2012 at 5:45 pm

Bill O'Reilly: The War on Christmas.
Rick Santorum: The Wart on Christmas.

Nostrildamus February 8, 2012 at 7:31 pm

Rush Limbaugh: The Warthog on Christmas.

Joshua Norton February 8, 2012 at 5:47 pm

He also asked for a kosher ham sandwich and a glass of milk at the seder.

SudsMcKenzie February 8, 2012 at 5:48 pm

The inquisition, lets begin
The inquisition, look out sin
We have our mission, to convert the Jews
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5McSEU48Y8

SayItWithWookies February 8, 2012 at 5:49 pm

I'll bet this really brightened the day of every Jew who received one — especially those who were missing the sanctimony, prejudice and ignorance of the reign of Ferdinand and Isabella.

MosesInvests February 8, 2012 at 9:54 pm

Isabella is referred to in Spanish as "La Catolica"-except by Spanish-speaking Jews, who call her "La Putolica".

GOPCrusher February 8, 2012 at 5:50 pm

I'm rooting on Rick to make it until Easter. Can't wait to see what his greetings to the Jews will be for that.

tihond February 8, 2012 at 7:10 pm

It'll just be that one old B.C. cartoon were a menorah turns into something Christian.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:36 pm

It'll be a totally patronizing:

"We forgive you. Ahem, YOU'RE WELCOME."

Boojum_Reborn February 8, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Fetes is the masculine plural of fetus?

Texan_Bulldog February 8, 2012 at 5:52 pm

Where's the Happy Kwanzaa card for the blah people? Racist….

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:21 pm

"Happy Kwanzer to All the Blahs from Team Santorum!"

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:37 pm

It got lost in the mail, but it was rumored to have the verse from the Bible where it talks about marking Cain for idenitification…

Blueb4sunrise February 8, 2012 at 5:55 pm

He who follows me will be covered with froth.

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:21 pm

Goes without sayin'.

aguacatero February 8, 2012 at 5:55 pm

This is like calling a creationist a dinosaur!

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Paleo libel!

Dashboard Buddha February 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

The dreidels on the right sort of look like cartoon hands flipping the bird. I wonder if that was by accident.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 8, 2012 at 6:27 pm

MIA Libel!

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:23 pm

I'm guessing it was. Much too subtle for Ricko & his supporters.

HogeyeGrex February 9, 2012 at 3:46 am

Perhaps not for the hired-help, possibly Jewish graphic designer, though.

Like that Vermont cop car thing.

GorzoTheMighty February 8, 2012 at 5:56 pm

So begins the next Great Disporia.

fartknocker February 8, 2012 at 5:57 pm

I sincerely doubt that a Kippah was ever intended to go with sweater vests.

Barrelhse February 8, 2012 at 8:59 pm

Kippahed herring?

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 8, 2012 at 5:58 pm

Using a quote from Jesus for a Hanukkah card?

Clearly Rick Santorum is a secret Muslim.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 8, 2012 at 5:58 pm

You know who else thought the Jews should follow Jesus?

ph7 February 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

ZZ Top?

flamingpdog February 8, 2012 at 6:05 pm

Noah Webster?

Negligently_Joe February 8, 2012 at 6:17 pm

Martin Luther?

CapnFatback February 8, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Jesus?

Negligently_Joe February 8, 2012 at 6:23 pm

Mitt Romney? I mean, retroactively.

Chet Kincaid February 8, 2012 at 6:41 pm

Bob "Serve Somebody" Dylan?

Guppy February 8, 2012 at 7:12 pm

Benedict XVI Torquemada?

Chichikovovich February 8, 2012 at 7:14 pm

Saul of Tarsus The Apostle Paul?

Angry_Marmot February 8, 2012 at 7:54 pm

Jesús "Boom Boom" Ramirez, the popular tour guide?

GregComlish February 8, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Neil Diamond?

Dudleydidwrong February 8, 2012 at 8:40 pm

The pied piper of Hamlin, NJ?

GorzoTheMighty February 8, 2012 at 9:19 pm

Probably not Juds..

Crank_Tango February 8, 2012 at 11:07 pm

Pontius Pilate?

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:38 pm

Definitely not Hitler.

BarackMyWorld February 8, 2012 at 6:00 pm

NOTHING SURPRISES ME ANYMORE.

emmelemm February 8, 2012 at 6:30 pm

+1

JackObin February 8, 2012 at 6:03 pm

If there were a god, would there be a Rick Santorum?

Barrelhse February 8, 2012 at 9:15 pm

If Rick Santorum fell in the forest, would anyone give a shit?

ShaveTheWhales February 9, 2012 at 12:17 am

The Pope, maybe?

Fare la Volpe February 9, 2012 at 7:33 am

If Rick Santorum fell out of the closet, would anyone be surprised?

orygoon February 8, 2012 at 6:06 pm

It's better than the reproduction lynching postcards that he sent to his black friends, though.

MissTaken February 8, 2012 at 6:14 pm

The lynching postcards were for Kwanzaa.

Generation[redacted] February 8, 2012 at 6:09 pm

"Holiday" season? That dirty secular humanist!

neiltheblaze February 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Rick has a great relationship with the Jews.

Geminisunmars February 8, 2012 at 6:38 pm

Some of his best friends are Jews. Like Eric Cantor.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:39 pm

Don't you mean the Jjj…jahs?

Come here a minute February 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

Rick also invited Mitt Romney over for coffee.

Callyson February 8, 2012 at 6:12 pm

I read that as "May your Hanukkah be bought," and thought I was looking at a Mittens ad.

Sharkey February 8, 2012 at 6:13 pm

"And congratulations! Just by reading this card, you have automatically been upgraded to Christian."

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:34 pm

"You're Welcome. Happy Jesus Baby Day!"

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:40 pm

So, now he's stepping in on the Mormonic's turf, eh?

Negligently_Joe February 8, 2012 at 6:16 pm

So, even assuming it's an "innocent mistake", wow.

Good to know the people who want to replace our Representative Democracy with a Christian Theocracy totally know their holy book well enough to avoid picking a Bible quote, for the Jews, that's not only from the wrong half of the Bible, but in context, is one of the more "Screw the Pharisees" moments.

Jukesgrrl February 8, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Santorum is Catholic. Most Catholics aren't taught to know the Bible, Old or New Testament. Their religious education is more likely to come from the papal-issued Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC). The Christmas and Easter stories are read from the Gospels at holiday masses and many familiar traditional stories, such as the prodigal son and the camel going through the needle's eye, are used as epistles, but I can't tell you of a single Catholic among my family and acquaintances who has actually gone to Bible study, save the ones who were students at Jesuit schools.

alzronnie February 8, 2012 at 6:17 pm

In Yiddish, Rick Santorum is Chaim Yankel

Swampgas_Man February 8, 2012 at 11:44 pm

See, I woulda gone w/ meshugga pisher.

MissTaken February 8, 2012 at 6:19 pm

In my family when it's time to celebrate a traditional Hanukkah we decorate the tree and then listen to grandpappy tell the story of how little baby Jeebus was born in a manger. We then eat ham, lots of yummy ham. Happy Hanukkah!

orygoon February 8, 2012 at 6:30 pm

My Jewish ex-neighbor Frank's mother's favorite holiday was Christmas and she bought shit for Christmas all year long. So every year I send him the most over-the-top Babby Jeebus card I can find.

I just love those personal holiday traditions, don't you?

Biff February 8, 2012 at 6:50 pm

My one Jewish friend and I have opposite traditions–he sends me Xmas cards, I send him Hanukka cards. Easter time is festive, as well.

HelmutNewton February 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Poor Frothy can't help it. He thinks all the Jews are going to Hell anyway.

spends2much February 8, 2012 at 9:11 pm

And it takes a real class act to tell them that in the form of a Hanukkah card!

Chet Kincaid February 8, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Oh Christ.

Chet Kincaid February 8, 2012 at 6:21 pm

Happy Ramadan! Enjoy this coupon for 1/2 off Rib Tips at Famous Dave's!

MosesInvests February 8, 2012 at 9:58 pm

Come in at Happy Hour and get 2 for 1 pitchers of beer!

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:42 pm

*coupon only redeemable between sunrise and sunset.

Chet Kincaid February 9, 2012 at 1:12 am

Grop, Moses, I like your thinking. Let's form the worst marketing/PR firm ever!!

Nothingisamiss February 8, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Bad for the Jews.

Lionel[redacted]Esq February 8, 2012 at 6:23 pm

The worse part is that Rick paid retail for the cards.

BlueStateLibel February 8, 2012 at 6:25 pm

Oh my, the stupidity…

SayItWithWookies February 8, 2012 at 6:30 pm

Oh, speaking of Santorum and terrible ideas, there seems to be a good deal of wailing and gnashing of teeth over at RedState. Really, I found this much more enjoyable than the usual fare over there — even the comments.

BarackMyWorld February 8, 2012 at 6:42 pm

Just in terms of statistical probability, every once in a while something reasonable must get published over there.

Bonzos_Bed_Time February 8, 2012 at 6:34 pm

Romney's "Holiday Season" card: Don't worry, your people have all been baptized!

rickmaci February 8, 2012 at 6:34 pm

Don't think we can pin this one on the Dick. Looks more like local campaign staff that got a little to lubed up with a frothy dose of holiday excitement.

Geminisunmars February 8, 2012 at 7:01 pm

I read that at first as "a frothy dose of holiday excrement." I guess that works too.

rickmaci February 9, 2012 at 5:31 pm

Exactly. LMAO.

Blueb4sunrise February 8, 2012 at 7:29 pm

Nope. Sorry. Don't play nice with them. Stomp every motherfucker even remotely connected, and ESPECIALLY the candidate.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:44 pm

You're judged by the company you keep. These folks are on his campaign, and a real leader takes responsibility for his staff.

And, that's just being objective. Subjectively, this is totally something that Rick would personally do. He's certainly more gay married to Jeebus than his staff.

SudsMcKenzie February 8, 2012 at 6:34 pm

Rick was also surprised that there was no difference between Katz's Delicatessen and any other restaurant in New York City. "I mean, it was exactly the same, even though it's run by Jews, primarily Jew patronship." Rick added: "There wasn't one person in Katz's Delicatessen who was screaming, '" This Gogl-Mogl is Meshuganeh".

Jukesgrrl February 8, 2012 at 8:56 pm

And he was sad to see they didn't have any mother-fucking iced tea to go with the pastrami on rye.

Barrelhse February 8, 2012 at 6:36 pm
Blueb4sunrise February 8, 2012 at 8:02 pm

I propose to rename Mississippi 'Largeasshole'.

Dudleydidwrong February 8, 2012 at 8:44 pm

"God bless Vespucciland…"

Barrelhse February 8, 2012 at 8:55 pm

Rancho Malario.

Jukesgrrl February 8, 2012 at 8:58 pm

My favorite comment from one Ronni Aiello: "Just call it the Gulf of The Confederacy and let the south secede and take it with them! Good riddance to the moochers!"

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:46 pm

This just in: The Onion announces bankruptcy citing crushing competition from reality.

MosesInvests February 9, 2012 at 12:12 am

According to one commenter, a constituent of the guy who proposed the bill, this was most likely a joke.

ShaveTheWhales February 9, 2012 at 12:24 am

Yeah, it will be interesting to see how the committee hearing goes.

OC_Surf_Serf February 8, 2012 at 6:38 pm

Yeah, Rick. Most of you Conservative Christains spell Jew "A-T-M".

montreal_bruin February 8, 2012 at 8:11 pm

I'm totes stealing "Christains."

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:38 pm

Weren't Christains on that shroud thingy?

Biff February 8, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Whoa, whose side is this motherfucker on in the war on Xmas, anyway? Xmas cards not good enough?

KosherUnicorn February 8, 2012 at 6:55 pm

Santorum: Happy Hanukkah Jews! Now convert and accept Jesus as your Savior!
What a self righteous dinkus.

Yisroel http://www.kosherunicorn.com

sezme February 8, 2012 at 6:56 pm

Ok, that was a little anti-Semitic, but his Jesusween card was totally inclusive.

chascates February 8, 2012 at 6:59 pm

Hey, half of his staff were ready to use a quote from The Protocols of the Elders of Zion!

ttommyunger February 8, 2012 at 7:01 pm

So, this moran either has balls the size of melons trying to convert the Heebs, or he is the dumbest motherfucker on the planet. I'm going with number two (get it?). Seriously, this stuff makes me want to shit…..a wildcat.

Veritas78 February 8, 2012 at 7:02 pm

There wasn't enough crap to quote in the old testament?

As I suspected, none of them have read the damn thing at all.

bagofmice February 8, 2012 at 7:30 pm

Blessed shall he be who takes your little ones and dashes them against the rock!

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:41 pm

They don't have to read it. The hierarchy read it for them & tell them how they should feel about it. Duh.

Barrelhse February 8, 2012 at 9:11 pm

Like, "God said: Abraham, kill me a son!"
Sounds kinda pro-choice.

BornInATrailer February 8, 2012 at 7:02 pm

If he had the Romney war chest, he probably would have sprung for those talking cards and had Cartman yelling "Jews can't eat Christmas snow!"

Chichikovovich February 8, 2012 at 7:02 pm

Well, this is better than the original card, which had Matthew 27:24-25:

24 When Pilate saw that he could prevail nothing, but that rather a tumult was made, he took water, and washed his hands before the multitude, saying, I am innocent of the blood of this just person: see ye to it.

25 Then answered all the people, and said, His blood be on us, and on our children.

Rick decided to save that one for Yom Kippur.

MosesInvests February 8, 2012 at 10:02 pm

Yeah, like Pontius Pilate ever *didn't* want to kill a Jew. AFAIK, he was the only Roman Procurator ever to be removed from office for excessive cruelty. You had to be mighty damn cruel for the Romans to think you were overdoing it.

*EDIT: Corrected split infinitive. I'm a bit of a grammar, you should excuse the expression, Nazi.

Huevos Ocupados February 9, 2012 at 2:51 am

Blood libel!

owhatever February 8, 2012 at 7:05 pm

Well, if they don't like it, we have Sheriff Joe building some special camps in Arizona, just for the Jews.

Chichikovovich February 8, 2012 at 7:11 pm

You'd think Ricky would have paid more attention to a holiday like this. You're guaranteed lots of Santorum if you have a miraculous supply of oil.

Guppy February 8, 2012 at 7:11 pm

Stay classy.

MinAgain February 8, 2012 at 7:26 pm

Hey, are those dreidels in the corner flipping someone off?

Nostrildamus February 8, 2012 at 7:30 pm

That takes Choot-spa!

mavenmaven February 8, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Latkes Libel!

StarsUponThars February 8, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Fetes don't fail me now.

ElPinche February 8, 2012 at 8:15 pm

Today we're all bathing in santorum.

C_R_Eature February 8, 2012 at 8:26 pm

It could have been worse. A nice visiting Kazakh journalist almost had them talked into printing several verses of the quaint but rousing traditional village song they'd been belting out in the office all afternoon.

Loaded_Pants February 8, 2012 at 8:26 pm

How about Revelation 2:9?

BZ1 February 8, 2012 at 8:48 pm

light coming from that dim bulb??

fuflans February 8, 2012 at 11:03 pm

i can't help it. when i see 'santorum', i don't think about rick.

Negropolis February 8, 2012 at 11:24 pm

Stay klassy, Rick.

Hey, you guys should just be happy he didn't wish them a happy "Chaka Khan".

Negropolis February 9, 2012 at 9:54 pm

I demand whorediamonds.

zappadoo76 February 9, 2012 at 12:26 am

Rick's Hanukkah card isn't aimed at Jews. It's aimed at evangelical Christians.

Negropolis February 9, 2012 at 3:01 am

Which is why he sent it to Jews, right? lol

He's a true-believing Jesus freak. He means everything he says when it comes to religion.

ruperto32 February 9, 2012 at 10:37 am

Psst–the evangelicals will find out about the card. It's a ploy to get their approval.

Cannolele February 9, 2012 at 11:05 am

Rick is dumb, but he's not that dumb. (Not in your league, lol.) He wants bible thumping Christians to know that he has been pimping Jesus to Jews.

Bobbysox22 February 9, 2012 at 11:18 am

Isn'tit a llittle tedious to have to have everything explained to you?

elburritodeluxe February 9, 2012 at 8:52 am

Is it me or do those dreidel look like middle fingers?

teebob2000 February 9, 2012 at 11:23 am

If the word of God can be wrong, I don't want to be right!

finallyhappy February 8, 2012 at 7:05 pm

good catch!

ttommyunger February 9, 2012 at 1:35 pm

True!

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