sigh

One Month Later, Half of U.S. Forgets Iraq War, Wants New War (With Iran)

Oh, so the war in Afghanistan is supposed to end soon-ish, like next year, maybe? Sure, we’ve done a pretty good job leaving that country on the brink of yet another horrifying civil war, NEXT. It is now Iran’s turn to be liberationed! Forty-nine percent of Americans, which for you statistically-minded folk means “probably at least one or even multiple people that you know,” believes the United States should start a preemptive war with Iran despite otherwise appearing in possession of the requisite faculties to breathe, eat, take a shit and respond to basic questions from a pollster that should denote sentience. Kind of weird, right!? Also weird: Americans felt as recently as November of last year (by a two-to-one margin) that other famed preemptive war “the Iraq thing” was a really awful waste of human life, money, human life, human life, time, etc. But HELLO, it is February 2012 already, and the troops are home since December! Which means it is time to send them all back out again.

The Hill went out and asked registered voters, “Should the U.S. be willing to use military force to prevent Iran from getting nuclear weapons” and got this:

Forty-nine percent said military force should be used, while 31 percent said it should not and 20 percent were not sure.

Sixty-two percent of likely voters said they were somewhat or very concerned about Iran making a terrorist strike on the United States, while 37 percent said they were not very concerned or not at all concerned about it.

Oh neat, this is basically about the same percentage of people who supported invading Iraq in October 2002 over their special super secret mystery cache of nuclear weapons weapons of mass destruction. Which proves that about half of the United States is in favor of total constant war, forever. Ha ha, which also reminds us: your Wonkette would like to see a constitutional amendment barring any American from supporting a war against a country that that person cannot locate on a map (without the help of Google search, no cheating). ETERNAL WAR OVER, JUST LIKE THAT!

Meanwhile, House Intelligence Committee member Michele Bachmann is trying to warn everyone that actually the problem is that Israel is being targeted by the U.S.:

“Any nation has to protect the safety and security of their people,” she said. “It is the nation of Israel that is being targeted by Iran, as well as the United States. We need to be vigilant. The Israelis need to be vigilant. And I think they’re taking prudent steps to keep their people safe.”

Or, it’s just another one of her losing battles with English syntax. [The Hill/ Bloomberg]

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111 comments

    1. Biff

      My mother used to sing this song, though she wasn't born until after "that" war ended, and before the next one, the big one.

  1. YouBetcha

    Invading a sovereign nation under false pretenses, spending money we don't have, with no plan in place? Sure. Why not? What could go wrong?

  2. memzilla

    "Should the US posture in such a way as to escalate tensions over control of the Persian Gulf — through which 20% of the world's oil passes — and cause Exxon's profits to quintuple overnight?"

    Not like the US has ever rattled this type of saber for this type of reason ever before. No, of course not.

    1. Biff

      I'd suggest that the USAmerica government should buy up all the stocks in all the oil companies, problems solved!

  3. V572 & friends

    Cognitive dissonance is so 20th century. We don't remember any of our past mistakes, and are therefore free to make more of the same ones. Plus Boeing, Lockheed Martin, Bechtel, Dynacorp, Parsons, Xe, etc….lotta jobs there, dontcha know? What're are their employees ever going to be in favor of if it isn't more war.

    ALL WAR ALL THE TIME. THIS IS WHO WE ARE.

    And all those maimed kids at your local Fisher House — they still believe, it's sad to say. The beauty of conscription was that it got assholes like me in the military, where we could say, "Hey, this is all bullshit! Why are we doing this?"

    I was quite good at that.

      1. V572 & friends

        No one remembers this but a few of us, but a hospital near Hanoi called Bach Mai fell under an “errant” string of 500-lb bombs from a B-52 on the night of December 22, 1972. The patients had been evacuated but 22 nurses, doctors and pharmacists were killed. The US government’s official story was that North Vietnamese antiaircraft missiles had crashed and exploded there after missing their targets. I had an aerial photograph that showed the unmistakable chain of craters from an “Arclight” strike, and wrote a letter to Nixon saying he (or his mendacious Pentagon spokesman Jerry W Friedheim) should quit lying about this, and that they could tell from my return address that I was in a position to prove they were lying.They did, probably coincidentally, since nothing happened to me.

    1. tejanojim

      They got my cousin, which I didn't expect. He went in and volunteered, they trained him up good and sent him somewhere "desert-y". Now he's back home with a substance abuse problem, a discharge, and a suicide attempt. Fuck endless war.

      1. Nothingisamiss

        But isn't the fact that "He's a hero," and "We have freedoms now" change his whole life into unicorns and ponies? No?

        Fuck endless war.

    1. Baconzgood

      War time economy is good. War never ever, in the history of man, put a nation in debt. Except all those times but once.

    2. Negropolis

      I think you misunderstood. We have to stop spending money…on poor and blah people at home. Foreign stuff that's not aid? Yeah, that is totally necessary spending.

  4. mavenmaven

    Why not invade Los Angeles instead? Lots of Persians, and down in Tennessee they don't really care whose side they are on, browns are browns.

    1. Biff

      Everybody loves to hate Los Angeles, but as soon as we attack and TV production halts and the 'tards can't watch their beloved Survivor of Dancing with the Bachelor, they'll lose their will to fight.

  5. chascates

    So this oil-filled country doesn't have weapons of mass destruction but might be working toward them.

    They can have nukes OR oil deposits but they can't have both!

  6. orygoon

    I can't forget Iraq because Mr. Goon brought home this new awful, terrible book about it from the library, which he reads by day and I read by night. The name of the book? The most damning words, evah: We meant well.

  7. SayItWithWookies

    I had a nice conversation a couple of weeks ago with a fellow (older than me, claimed to be a small businessman) who said we should attack Iran. I asked him if he knew that Iran had five times the area of Iraq and three times the population, and his responses were no and no.
    Anyway, if some jackasses want to attack Iran, they're invited to go over there and damn well do it themselves.

    1. BarackMyWorld

      Not to take away the point of your story, but your relative size numbers are a little off, but close.

      1. SayItWithWookies

        Close enough — 2.5 times the population, and almost five times the area. I should've prefaced it by saying that I'd asked the guy which country of the two was larger and he said he figured it was Iraq. So by General Eric Shinseki's calculations — which got him fired because he was right — it would take 1.25 million troops to occupy Iran. I still haven't heard a rightie mention how awesome that would be.

    2. fuflans

      when i hear 'small businessman' (and often 'doctor'), i usually tune right out.

      they are so often walking republican talking points. with a big dollop of ugly ignorance thrown in for good measure.

  8. EatsBabyDingos

    Iran banned "The Simpsons" today. We should send them Kardashians and take no prisoners. Pork rinds for Allah!

  9. SorosBot

    With the constant vitriol and violent rhetoric about Iran coming from two nuclear nations, one of which is the most militarily powerful country in the world, I have no idea why they'd want to develop their own nuclear deterrent,

    1. Nothingisamiss

      Listen, there's no tellin' what them EYE-rackies-er-rannies are thinkin'. They's Muslins! We don't need to figger 'em out.

      1. Loaded_Pants

        As I like to point out, there's only been one country that has ever used nuclear weapons. Guess I'm one of those Un-Americans (Negative-Americans?)

    2. Negligently_Joe

      But you're forgetting! Iranians are Muslins, and thus have a concept in their religion called Martyrdom, which makes them Unpredictable and Scary.

      Unlike Christians, whose entire religion is most certainly not predicated on a single act of martyrdom, and Catholics in particular, who definitely did not proceed to create an entire Expanded Universe of people who were granted superhero status because of their martyrdoms.

      1. SorosBot

        And the Muslims of course have the concept of jihad, or holy war, which Christians have never had, no never.

        Note that this was the argument someone used in a letter to the editor in my local paper in the run-up the the invasion of Iraq – of course it took me too seconds to go "a duh, crusade you fucking moron".

        1. Negligently_Joe

          This is also the literal argument that Sr. Frothy has been using during his campaign, including during several major debates. And he's a Serious Candidate, who's competitive against Romney in several states! I think American politics may really just be over the cliff already by this point.

  10. Chichikovovich

    The Iran question is pretty vague, and people could understand it to mean "Are there any circumstances you can imagine, that would involve Iran arming itself with nuclear weapons, which would call for military action"? That's a tough call, especially if you understand "willing to use" to mean "prepared to use it if other alternatives fail". I'm not sure I wouldn't answer yes to that question myself, understood in that way.

    What makes me weep is rather the numbers in answer to the question:
    Favor or Oppose Cutting Military Spending to Help Balance
    Budget?

    For heaven's sake people – take fifteen seconds to look at a pie chart of how much money gets spent on the military as opposed to (say) PBS. Do you really think you're going to cut taxes and keep that number constant, or even raise it, by putting ads on Sesame Street?

    1. Guppy

      You see "the military." I see "a federal jobs program that the GOP can pretend isn't." Nevermind how much of the defense budget actually goes to hardware manufacturers and/or mercenaries, "the military" gave Jim-Bob's nephew a job.

    2. Negropolis

      It's vague because it's push-polling, plain and simple. It's vague by design. This is the same kind of shit pollsters did to sell a war in Iraq. You nudge them with vague questions about a vague threat knowing that Americans are nuts for vague threats and challenges to our so-believe authority as the world police.

  11. Schmannnity

    Of that 49%, 67% were in favor of nuclear carpet bombing because we can't have countries using weapons of mass destruction.

  12. littlebigdaddy

    I say we start a preemptive war with Fuckwadistan, which includes a number of US states where these ijits live: AZ, TN, TX, AL (and AK too).

  13. Baconzgood

    If you love Israel so much Michele Bachmann why don't you turn it un-gay and marry it?

    {Does this mean we can send Chisel Face Shelly (my pet name for Michele Bachmann- because she needs to use a chisel to get all her make up off every night) to Isreal?}

    1. Loaded_Pants

      I'm actually surprised that Michele loves Israel since they allow gays to serve in their military.

  14. widestanceshakedown

    The only reason I would fight in Iran would be for a hot gay war husband, but I'm destroying America rather well with the not-husband I already have,

  15. SorosBot

    An’ here I sit so patiently
    Waiting to find out what price
    You have to pay to get out of
    Going through all these things twice

  16. Chichikovovich

    Sixty-two percent of likely voters said they were somewhat or very concerned about Iran making a terrorist strike on the United States,

    As the British found in Northern Ireland, shipping over the military in force really cuts down on the terrorist attacks, there and at home.

  17. Lascauxcaveman

    USA and Iran ganging up on Israel? LOL Mish-one-el, that's like the Wanderers and the Duckie Boys ganging up on the Baldies. Ain't gonna happen.

  18. qwerty42

    …Sixty-two percent of likely voters said they were somewhat or very concerned about Iran making a terrorist strike on the United States…
    WTF? Will Iran use land- and sea-based ICBMs, long-range bombers or will they just send their fleet with several aircraft carriers off to attack coastal cities?

    Well, since
    History repeats itself, first as tragedy, then as farce.
    Karl Marx

    I guess we should expect great wailing and moaning about the horrible, horrible danger we are in. Then we attack Iran. But, of course, they welcome us. Or some such fantasy.

  19. Guppy

    Fine. Whatever. Just so long as we implement an Israeli-style draft to fight it and pay for it with a drastic increase on capital gains taxes.

    I'm tired.

    1. snoopyfan2010

      When you say OIsraeli style you mean only the the real Americans who founded this country will fight, right?

  20. johnnyzhivago

    I'm all for a war with Iran as long as it's more exciting – and better TV than the Iraq mess. It also has to be shorter – 8 seasons – come on! and most of all we have to be winning or else it gets really boring.

  21. poorgradstudent

    I've been finding it really useful to conceptualize the US and Israel relationship by way of Al and Peg Bundy.

    "Aaaaaaaaaal, I don't like the way Iran's been looking at me. I want you to go over there and bomb them!"
    "Peg! You know I'm going through a recession, and I just got done with Iraq. And don't even ask me about Afghanistan."
    "Fine. Here I am, thinking about the best ways I can spend your money, and you won't even help me blow up a country, and by the way I saw you rolling your eyes at me when all I did was make a little suggestion about putting more settlers in the West Bank, and don't even think about…."
    *Al goes back to thinking about his glory days in World War II. "Everybody loved me then. What happened?"*

  22. Beowoof

    Arlo Guthrie screaming kill, kill, kill, I wanna kill kill, and the military recruiter saying "You're our boy" just played in my head.

    Most of these nitwits walk around like their tough cause their hired body guards of the military go and do the fighting for them. If one of those assholes who think war is a good idea had to show up, learn how to shoot and then go kill muslims, pacifism would be the leading movement in this country. Thus, I am supporting bringing back the draft and enlisting all the tough guys who like fighting so much. Let those guys go and have a ball and not sit back and watch someone else fight their battles for them.

    1. Swampgas_Man

      I'd like to add– anyone who's gone on record "supporting" torture, the marines who pissed on the dead or the psychos who hunted civilians for sport gets moved up to 1A on the draft.

  23. Beowoof

    As soon as a republican is willing to raise taxes enough to pay for it, I say go for it. Oh and draft their kids to do the shooting and dying.

  24. hebmskebm

    Even today anybody who opposed Iraq from the start is seen as "not a serious person". Only those who were catastrophically wrong about Iraq can be trusted to lead future wars.

  25. owhatever

    Iraq is not the real problem. I saw a movie that may have been a documentary in which aliens are attacking the earth with big machines that cause explosions and deaths. If we cannot stop them even in a local movie theater, what chance do we have to survive as spices?

  26. C_R_Eature

    Everyone prepare for "Operation Here We Go Again!

    oh…in the case of Bill Kristol, etc.: Operation Here Your Kids Go Again!

  27. unclejeems

    Bachmann–puts the intelligence in House Intelligence Committee.

    To Bachmann–to make or write a statement so contrary to common sense, that even stupid people think the author is stupid.

  28. Dashboard Buddha

    You know, Ahmadinejad may be crazier than a shit house rat. Plus, they're parading a cardboard poster of the Ayahtoldya around to "inspect" the military. So, the crazy is strong over there – must be the heat.

    But, given all of that, one just needs to look at a map to understand that just because you're paranoid doesn't mean people aren't out to get you.

  29. Dashboard Buddha

    "House Intelligence Committee member Michele Bachmann"

    Wait, what? How the hell did I miss that?

  30. grace_nearing

    "over their special super secret mystery cache of<s> nuclear weapons</s> weapons of mass destruction"

    Further downgraded to "weapons of mass destruction program-related activities" by Bush's second term.

  31. Negropolis

    I don't believe these numbers…because I don't want to believe these numbers. Surely, everyone realizes that a pre-emptive war with Iran is far worse than a nuclear Iran, right? I mean, we're not that forgetful, are we? We were really about to do this WMD bullshit, again? Really?

    Obama better have balls when Israel attacks Iran, 'cause the very one thing he could do to not make me vote for him is to get twisted up in Iran. Israel can fuck off for all I care. With "friends" like that, who needs enemies?

    BTW, if they start pre-emptive war with Iran, the military should just revolt. You thought OWS was bad, before, just wait until that decision.

  32. Negropolis

    If we were worried about a terrorist attack funded by Iran, before, just wait until Israel strikes them. Talk about making your self less safe. How much better an example can you have of a self-fulfilling prophecy?

Comments are closed.